So as I said in my review of Twilight, I have never read or watched this “saga”. I remember when they came out (I’m 29) and how crazy everyone went over them, including one of my best friends, but they never interested me.
But my niece was visiting this summer and she really wanted to watch them, so I thought why not give them a look over. And do #twihardsaturdays for Horrorfest X.
Plus people are always saying that if Catherine Morland existed today she’s be all over this series, so it is Jane Austen related. Sort of.
This film was really really hard for me to watch. It is badly written, which I expected, but what was worse was how manipulative and abusive Bella was to Edward.
We begin the film with Bella having a dream that she is old and she has turned 18 in real life, but Edward will stay forever 17. The first thing she starts with is trying to convince Edward to turn her. She uses emotional abuse and manipulation to convince Edward to turn her. She is constantly trying to guilt him into it and almost all of her dialogue is about 18 is ancient turn me, when will you turn me, please turn me, and so on.
They watch Romeo and Juliet and Bella keeps talking over and over that suicide is great and how she would love him to turn her into a vampire and it is really disturbing. Edward is not at all into it, and all I can think is Edward should dump her and run far away because Bella is really weird.
I feel so much for Edward, Bella is super annoying about being a vampire and constantly harassing him. He’s only known her for less then a year and she’s only 18, like how does she know she will want to spend “forever” with him? She kind of sounds like The Little Mermaid, and not in a good way.
To be perfectly honest it feels more like she would try to be “forever” with any vampire as she just wants to be a vampire. She doesn’t love Edward, he was just the first vampire she met.
Then Bella has her birthday party at the Cullen’s house and I think it is super rude that she doesn’t celebrate with her dad. Why didn’t she bring Edward over to her house? Like that would make a lot more sense. In fact as I think about it, she never has Edward come to her house or interact with her dad. Very suspicious!
So at the party Bella gets injured and Edward flings her across the room and throws her on the wall where she breaks something and is more severely injured then she was before, her arm bleeding everywhere as he tries to “protect” her.
Like seriously? What is Edward doing.
So Bella is all this is fine even though that is a serious injury, and again one she has had from being around the Cullens and vampires. Although it’s just a cut when she should have a seriously bruised tailbone as Edward threw her across the room, into the wall, with his vampire super strength. Edward is starting to realize that this is not a good idea, then being around will probably just put her more at risk especially as Jasper has a really hard time dealing with stuff like that.
Edward is starting to realize that hanging out with a mortal human who is constantly getting injured at his hands is not a good idea, and that continuous time around her will probably just put her more at risk. So Edward does the mature thing and breaks up with Bella, he and his family leaving as it isn’t the best thing for them to be around her right now.
Bella Swan: If this is about my soul, take it I don’t want it with out you!
Edward Cullen: It’s not about soul Bella. You’re just not good for me!
But Bella is not mature. She does not deal with the breakup well. She isolates herself from her friends and spends all her time in her room. I don’t know why people always hate on her dad as he tries really hard. He’s so concerned about her he is going to send her back with her mom but she refuses to go and hangs out with Jessica to please him. Her dad is trying to help her, but she doesn’t really communicate well with him.
When she is out with Jessica she sees some bikers and it reminds her of the time when Edward saved her from some dudes. She goes with him and sees Edward’s image. Here is where she becomes abusive by using coercion and constantly putting her life in danger so that she can bring Edward to her, so that he will save her from these terrible situations, or if she dies so that he will be forced to turn her. Because if he really “loved” her he would always be there to “save” her. Well how about your stop doing things like that.
This really gives me a vibe that Stephanie Meyer was obsessed with some boy at school and he rejected her and she wanted him and tried to get him and instead wrote this book.
So Bella starts hanging out with Jacob and using him to make her feel better. And this really makes me upset as she has no romantic feelings for him but she continues to lead him on.
“Bella Swan: Dear Alice, I wish I had your real address. I wish I could tell you about Jake. He makes me feel better. I mean, he makes me feel alive. The hole in my chest… well, when I’m with Jake it’s like it’s almost healed for a while. But even Jake can’t keep the dreams away.
Like this is a horrible thing to do and it really makes me mad how she just uses him. Poor little boy, he’s like only 15 in this film.
So she and Jacob grow close and she injures herself again and again being dumb and bleeds a lot. It’s funny to me how she doesn’t see how much better it is with a human helping her as he doesn’t push her into another rock or something and cause more bleeding or broken bones.
Jacob really likes her and let’s her know his feelings but she crushes them. He then gets sick and she takes him home and it turns out that he is a werewolf.
Bella is furious at this and tells him he should try and stop and I’m like really? Werewolves don’t have any choice in the matter, like vampires. And I can’t believe someone who is constantly begging vampires to turn her can tell someone to stop being a cryptid, especially one who has no control over it but has a gene that causes them to turn. Stop being a hypocrite and get over yourself Bella.
It really bugs me too how horribly they treat the Native Americans. The Native Americans are seen as the bad guys as Bella tells Jacob to change, he can be better than that. Better than my race Bella? Really?
I also don’t like how the one man, Sam, he abused his girlfriend as he couldn’t control his wolf power (which I like that the film makes it very clear that this is not okay) and Bella is all upset, but yet the damage Edward does to her is no big deal. I mean Emily had her face scratched but Bella has been thrown against the headboard (when they were making out in her underwear), had her leg broken, femeol artery cut open, Edward sucks the poison out and almost kills her (Carlisle has to smack him out of it), and she’s been thrown against a wall by Edward causing a vase to break and cut her arm open. Yet, that’s okay? But the Native American werewolves are bad guys?
Bella is also mad that Jacob doesn’t want to be around her because he is afraid of hurting her. But again, all she tells him is he should change.
She is also mad that Jacob killed the vampire that tried to kill her as Vampires being killed is evil. This whole storyline is that werewolves are really bad as they kill animals and vampires they don’t have a treaty with but what are the vampires killing and eating? They are definitely killing animals too.
I also don’t like this negative undertone of Narive Americans as being angry, aggressive, can’t control themselves, killers, need to change who they are but Vampires are pale, perfect, and something to be achieved.
So it turns out Edward thinks that Bella is dead as Alice told him she saw a vision where Bella died and when he called the house Jacob tells him the dad is at a funeral (his friend who had a heart attack when he was hunting) and Edward thinks it is Bella, even though Edward could have just asked who’s funeral.
I think it is weird as the first thing he does is decide to kill himself instead of coming to the funeral or paying the last respects first. Something that most normal people would do. And interesting that Bella this while time has been trying to kill herself so Edward could save her or turn her, but when he finds out she died he does neither of those things. Sucks to suck.
Edward then heads to Italy to try and kill himself by the Vultori but they don’t want to kill him as they want his ability to read minds. Weird, whatever.
Back in Forks, Alice comes and is surprised to see if Bella is alive. It turns out because Bella was with a werewolf that it blocked her vision.
They then hurry to Italy but I don’t know how as Vampires aren’t able to cross over water. And even if they aren’t following that lore, they’re no way they would beat him with how long it takes to travel and these vampires don’t shape shift.
But they save Edward, return home, and stood up to the Volturi who aren’t even scary. They look like they bought their vampire outfits at the discount store.
I know a lot of people like these movies, but I don’t get it. And there are three more films left to watch, I’m really regretting this.
For more on Twilight, go to Bella Becomes Obsessed With Edward and Won’t Leave Him Alone Until He Dates Her: Twilight (2008)
For more vampires, go to You’re Mother is a Shadowhunter…Like You: The Mortal Instruments, City of Bones (2013)
For more werewolves, go to Holy Smokes! Your Mom’s a Werewolf!: My Mom’s a Werewolf (1989)