May the Odds Be in Your Favor

So back in July I celebrated my 7th blogiversary!

I wanted to do something special-but I wasn’t sure what to do…

Hmmm

So I asked you all, and you responded with “do a giveaway”. A giveaway?!!

I have done a giveaway twice before and I swore to never do one again. Why? Well the first giveway–I received zero entries.

But I rallied, I regrouped-instead of one item I decided I would include three.

And I included it on rafflecopter!

And how many entries did I receive? ZERO!

I know I was so sad I swore NEVER, EVER again.

Yes, here we are three years later and I’m trying to do another giveaway. I have worked hard to get a group of items that will hopefully be irresistible to you all. Please, just one person enter or else I’m going to sit in a corner and cry.

Please, oh please!

So you will win:

  • Tea of Life White Tea Pomegranate 50 Tea Bag Tin
  • July 2019 to December 2020 Planner
  • Cranberry Spice Dionis Goat Milk Lotion
  • Jane Austen Notebook
  • Wooden Box
  • Sense and Sensibility Upcycled Bracelets
  • 4 Mini Chesapeake Bay Candles
  • Sense and Sensibility Upcycled Ornaments
  • 1 Wool Multicolored Scarf
  • 1 Upcycled Library Book Checkout Slip Bookmark
  • Flower Earrings

So I am sharing this here on my blog, on facebook, instagram, twitter. To enter to win on each platform, follow the instructions below!

On My Blog:

  • Like this post
  1. EXTRA ENTRY: Reblog this post
  2. EXTRA ENTRY: Follow me
  3. EXTRA ENTRY: Comment below

On Facebook:

  • Like this post
  1. EXTRA ENTRY: Tag a friend (each comment an extra entry)
  2. EXTRA ENTRY: Share this post
  3. EXTRA ENTRY: Like Me on Facebook

On Instagram

  • Like the post
  1. EXTRA ENTRY: Tag a friend (each comment an extra entry)
  2. EXTRA ENTRY: Share this post in your stories (mention me)
  3. EXTRA ENTRY: Follow me on Instagram

On Twitter

  • Like this post
  1. EXTRA ENTRY: Tag a friend (each comment an extra entry)
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Pride and Prejudice and Mistletoe

Pride and Prejudice and Mistletoe by Melissa de La Cruz

So my friend gave this to me last year for Christmas, along with Praying with Jane…she knows me so well.

And I have been saving it until this December as it just didn’t feel right posting after Christmas.

I was a bit wary when I saw that the book was to be turned into a Hallmark movie. It could be fantastic…or it could be a horrible cliché.

I figured I’ll start off the month with this book, review the film on 13th, and then review Holiday Mix Tape on December 25th. At least that’s the plan…we will see what happens.

My life motto right there…

So…having read this-sorry ya’ll we are starting this holiday season off with a Scrooge review. I hated this book and thought it was horrible.

**Spoiler Warning**

I will be giving away the end so if you don’t want the end ruined, better leave now.

GOOD!

So I know who Melissa de La Cruz is although I have never read her books before. I do know that she is Filipino-American and I wish she had used that in writing her story. I would have much rather read Pride and Prejudice with the influence if Filipino culture than this.

If this was just a holiday cozy Christmas tale-I probably wouldn’t care-but when they added Jane Austen into the mix-I judge much harsher…

They failed!

So the first thing about this book is that it is gender swapped. Darcy is a 29-year old female and Elizabeth is Luke Bennet. Jane is a younger brother named Jim, and there is a Kit and Lyle instead of Kitty and Lydia. Charlotte Collins instead of William Collins and a Carl (Caroline Bingley?) Darcy also has four brothers (more on that later) and a best friend named Charles Bingley.

I thought you said they were all gender-swapped?

Yes, Charles. Charles is the only one that isn’t gender swapped which makes no sense at all. If you are going to swap everyone else, why exclude him? It is so odd when everyone else is gender-swapped.

So Darcy Fitzwilliam is a beautiful big lipped beauty (not kidding about the lips, the description goes on and on) is 29 and single. She’s afraid of commitment and never wants to be married but tired of hearing everyone saying she is alone and thinking she should be married. She is a:

At least until midway through the book.

Her mother had a heart attack so she heads back to Pemberley, Ohio-her hometown she left and swore never to return to after a horrible break from her family. When she refused to marry Carl (Caroline Bingley ?) her father disowned her.

So first of all problem one-Darcy never had a bad relationship with his father-he greatly admired him. And problem two-having his parents die and him having to be the father to his sister created his character. You ever notice how people who lost a parent/parents and had to take on that roll for younger siblings are always a littlr more bossy or parental? They tend to tell others what they should do, just as they would for their sibling. Now there is a way to do it without the parents being dead-but it should be a bigger deal with his/her roll in the family. Having Darcy separated doesn’t work at all. Like how is Darcy supposed to take care of Georgiana-or George in this-if they have been separated from their family for EIGHT years-no phone calls, emails, social media, etc. (Except she talks to the mom every now and then.

Speaking of which there is extremely little social media in this book at all which I find completely strange as this was published in 2017.

No social media? She’s 29!

So Darcy has to get a dress and her mom tells her to go to Bloomingdales-now this wouldn’t have registered with me but someone who reviewed the book mentioned that there are no Bloomingdales in Ohio, and I checked online and yes, there are none. So wow-wonder where Darcy got her dress at?

Hmm…

Darcy is an annoying character as she has no personality. Example: she named her lion “Little Lion” and she sees nothing wrong with that as an adult. She can’t even think of a name for her baby at first as she likes to name everything factual. REALLY!!!!! She can’t even think of a name AND WANTS TO CALL HER LITTLE BABY until Luke makes her stop and choose a name.

So back to the story-every year her parents throw a big holiday party and Darcy goes to it and she is upset at everyone being married and talking about families because oh no, Darcy is not about any of that. Really? This was turned into a Hallmark movie-it says on the cover, so all that is a LIE.

I get they are trying to set her up for she fell in love and changed how she felt and everything…but she says that all the time, it is really annoying. And she is rude to all the people who are married and have kids and still live in Pemberley.

At the party she runs into Charles Bingley who she hasn’t seen or spoken to in eight years. Yep, they become best friends again and Charles listen to the advice given to someone who he hasn’t seen in eight years. What kind of logic is that? And they don’t even act like normal people! If I ran into my best friend after EIGHT years we would be gabbing and talking about all we’d been doing and life and here they do none of that. They reminisce for a few minutes and are best pals. But that’s it. No how’s life, no sharing about work or jobs, or anything. Wow-great “best friend” here, she’s too busy talking about how “hot” he is rather than about finding out about who he is.

You are a bad friend.

Bingley runs into Jim (Jane Bennet)-literally and the two are off together. Wow, Bingley has been to every Fitzwilliam Christmas party every year, but oh on this time he’s hit by cupid’s arrow. Why? What? Like why now? There is no explanation and feels contrived.

What?

Darcy gets drunk and runs into Luke Bennet-her hated attractive archenemies. Yes, she goes on about how she hates him but goes on and on describing how hot he is. He is happy to see her and wants to catch up but she just yells about how everyone is jealous of her beauty and being self made and a woman. She goes on a long rant about how much better she is than anyone at the party. She keeps going yelling at Luke about how he is a loser for being a carpenter and staying at his hometown.

WWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!!!!!

I know…I have no clue what the writer’s were thinking.

Did you EVEN read the book????!!! If not reading the book, DID YOU you even watch the movie???? This is so not Pride and Prejudice. This a train wreck!

Ugh! Really!

This is a horrible book!!! Horrible!!!!

I shouldn’t have read this.

They turn out to be under the mistletoe and even though she’s been a horrible person, Luke decides to kiss her anyway-why I don’t know??! They should stay away from mistletoe though.

They kiss again, but are interrupted by Carl who comes into the scene. She dumped him, was disowned by her father, and fled to New York-but hooks up with him every now and then.

Why?

Seriously, Mr. Darcy would never do that. He would never drag someone’s hopes on when he isn’t interested. Such a jerky thing to do!

I can’t help but compare this book to the Christmas film 12 Men of Christmas. Like that film isn’t an official Pride and Prejudice film, but did this soooo much better. It had interesting characters, it had a new angle, it was a cute Christmas film-and it did keep to the finer points of the STORY!! Sorry for that rant, but I totally recommend it.

So Darcy meets with Carl for coffee the next day but then even though she 100% does not want to get married, have children, etc-and 100% does not want to marry Carl-she tells him when offered an ultimatum-give me time to think about it. What!!!!!! Seriously!! UGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH What is this character. Soooooo annoying. I have had to read page after page about how she doesn’t want marriage or family, or Carl-but instead of cutting him loose “I’ll think about it?” NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Darcy talks about how great she us at her job and makes so much money and is so smart, but we never hear or see what she does. Guess she’s not so important.

So Darcy gets invited to Christmas Caroling with Bingley who is in love with Jim. They are going with the Bennets and Darcy meets Kit and Lyle who are demon spawn. Seriously- they are horrible human beings. Like geez-did you read the book?

Did you even read the book!!!

They all go out caroling and we get a rant about how sexist, and against human rights, and against animal rights the 12 Days of Christmas…WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW

WHAT IS THIS BOOK???!!!!!!!

WHAT!!!??

They end up at the Fitzwilliam house where they all get drunk-Darcy gets really drunk, and she and Luke kiss again under the mistletoe.

She wakes up with Luke in her room. They had started to get together last night, but Darcy passed out. WOW such great writing and storytelling. Jane Austen would be so proud-(in case you don’t know I’m being sarcastic!) This is horrid!!!!

Ugh!

Darcy and Luke argue and fight and she’s all I’m better with my money blah, blah-but she gets a call and her deal fell through. But no big deal, it’s like a blimp. Seriously what does she do? Oh that’s not important-she’s just rich and important, that is all we need to know. Bleh, bleh, bleh-this is awful, this is horrible, I hate it.

This book!!!!

Bingley goes on about how he is in love with Jim and prepared to move back to Pemberley and be with him forever…after 2 days. Yes, they have never spoken or spent time with each other before, but after 2 days he’s sure he is the one. Darcy tells him to slow down and YEAH she’s got a point. Dude you have spent 2 days with him, just TWO!!! Like in the original book they have spent more time together and Darcy’s fears came from Jane not showing overt affection, not seeming to be as invested, and of course Jane’s family. Here there is no wiggle room, Darcy is 100% in the right-it has been two days, but they make it seem as if she is being a jerk and selfish when she isn’t. She’s actually being a good friend…for once.

She actually can be a good friend.

She convinces Bingley to break a date with Jim and hang out with her and Bingley agrees, not a bad idea as they have been spending 24/7 together and need to have some space. But instead of Bingley telling him the truth he lies and says he is sick and goes off with Darcy on the town and get caught. So then Jim is mad, understandable, and they’re over. But then Darcy convinces Bigley to pull a Lloyd Dobler and they get back together. Wow, that happened all in a day-such an emotional roller coaster.

At least for this post!

Meanwhile, Luke is engaged!!! He was kissing Darcy and would have slept with her if she hadn’t been drunk and he’s engaged!!!! Everyone in this book is awful!!!!!!!!!! He claims he was on a break-but unlike Ross-he wasn’t!!!!! I’m sorry I really, just really…I CAN’T EVEN!!!

Like this is based on an amazing novel, and this whole things feels like a separate story that was just inputed with names from Jane Austen to capitalize on all us fans. Like this has nothing to do with the book!!!! NOTHING!!!! THIS is HORRIBLE!!! I HATE IT!!!!!!

This book

Darcy is in love with Luke why I don’t know as they have had, what three conversations in three days (most of the conversations being about how great and wonderful Darcy is and Luke sucks)-and shared two kisses. That’s the sum of their relationship. But she’s in love. And looks through her yearbook. Now this gets me. She’s already been mooning over him, why not look up his facebook or instagram. They never spend any time on social media at all-I don’t know any 29 year old who is so free from the siren call of social media.

Read in this case.

So Darcy looks over her yearbook and sees the picture of Luke and admits she’s always been in love with him. WOOOOOOWWWW!!! Really? This is dumb. Because guess what guys even though she is sooooooooo in love with Luke ever since high school she gets engaged and reserves the plaza to a wedding to Carl. What the freak is this?!!! Yes, pages of how she doesn’t love Carl or want to ever be with him an she gets engaged!!!!

Oh and her mother who was on death’s door, is better in like  four days.

No social media? She’s 29!

Then Darcy has three brothers who they all hate her and treat her like crap. Which was not like in the bookokk!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m so angry!

I have to take a break…

I’m done

Okay…so her little brother Will got into Harvard and she’s like whatever no big deal. Now I am not from a wealthy family, if interested I wrote a little about it in Pride, Prejudice, and Personal Statements, so I don’t assume I know what it is like. But I do know from watching Gossip Girl you can’t have someone be a Blair and a Nate. This whole book Darcy has been Blair-I’m great, money, wealth, I have a plan for my life, cares about what people think, cares about where to go and what to do, etc. But then when her brother gets into Harvard-she suddenly becomes like Nate Archibald when he wants to join Carter in giving up everything and backpacking the neighborhood saying screw the inheritance, trust funds, big name schools, etc. You can’t have a character be both.

And Darcy is a horrible older sibling and her younger brothers are all horrible too and the they nothing like Georgiana and Darcy!!! Where is this???!!!

Darcy is engaged to Carl (a mess of her own doing), doesn’t break off the engagement, and goes to the engaged Luke to tell him that she loves him. Really?????????

He calls her names and Darcy heads to NYC. WOOOOOOOOOOOWW!!!!!!!!! So romantic. AWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFULAWFUL

It is so awful!

So Darcy goes back to work where we see is is a horrid boss and her employees dislike her which wasN’T IN THE BOOOOKKKK!!! Did they even read the book? Or see an adaption?? The employees and renters loved Mr. Darcy!  That’s one of the things that fully convinces Elizabeth she was in the wrong-how could anyone be a horrible awful human being but be good to their employees? It’s like people yelling at the waitstaff. You can have someone who seems great-but inside are horrible and treat the waitstaff like crap-but you never have someone who is a horrible human being but treat their waitstaff great.

Darcy dumps Carl in a note and flies home to Pemberley to help out Kit and Lyle Bennet who are demon spawn. Like they should be sent to Juvie. Here is what they have done:

  • Set a trash can on fire
  • Set a classmate’s shoe on fire
  • Set frogs free from the science lab (pass for that)
  • Had drugs
  • Spray painted obscenities
  • Stealing test answers
  • Giving a student a stick-and-poke tattoo
  • Physical fights with students and faculty

If they were in school with my kid, just because some rich girl paid off the principal I’d be furious. They are horrible.

And one their names are Kit and Lyle

Darcy does the good deed of helping them and keeping them in school instead of juvie, which is a horrible idea, and then she collapses.

She ends up in the hospital as she was dehydrated. And in like two pages (15 mins) all the issues between Dacry and her father solved. Oh he cut her off because he was afraid she would be hurt in New York and never come back. He’s been mean to her because he doesn’t know how to tell her he loves her. Oh wow. …..yeah this is dumb.

Read in this case.

Darcy gets healed and she’s invited to Charlotte and Luke’s wedding rehearsal (why as they aren’t friends) and she decides to go, no ones there and the two are together.

So back it up, it has been like five days-they have had four conversations

  1. Darcy dunk at the party-talking about herself and insulting Luke
  2. Christmas Carols where they hardly speak at all
  3. The morning after Christmas caroling-Darcy insulting Luke and talking about herself
  4. Darcy admitting she loves Luke and Luke insulting her

As you can see most of these are Darcy talking about how Luke sucks, and most of Luke’s conversations are calling Darcy a snob and other names…but oh no they are in love.

Seriously!!!!!!!!!!! I’m sorry, I am not a writer-I know it’s not my talent, and I really can’t say I could do better but this sucks.

In the end Luke and Darcy get married and have a daughter, move to New York. It never says what Luke does but I assume Darcy keeps working at her job even though she lost the biggest deal, the biggest deal that turned out to not be a  big deal. Whatever.

I know…I have no clue what the writer was thinking.

This is awful and I’m glad its over. I’m sooo done…

So will the movie be as bad? I watched the trailer and it looks like they actually spend some time together so there is hope…but we shall see…

Pass on it!

For more Pride and Prejudice, go to Drive Me Crazy: Austentatious (2015)

For more Pride and Prejudice book adaptations, go to Pride, Prejudice, and Personal Statements

Book Club Picks: Chasing the Wind

So it has been a loooooooooooooooooooong time since I did a book club book review, I was only a few behind but then things happened and I fell behind.

I am almost a year behind in reviews, but I will do my hardest to catch up.

So quick recap for those who haven’t heard of my book club.

So as you all know I started a book club, because you know me and books…

Every month we read a book and I do a little post on the book we read and discussed. What can I say, I just love books and need to be around others who feel the same.

There is no theme, other than with each month, a different member gets to pick a book, whichever one they want. This time was my turn and I chose:

Chasing the Wind (California Rising #3) by Paula Scott

So I was first introduced to Paula Scott when I worked at our local museum. I actually got to meet the her and speak to her, and after hearing about how she researched and just listening to how she spoke about her work I decided to borrow the book from the library and read: Until the Day Breaks.

Then the second book came out and my coworker and I were discussing the series and she told me that she had really enjoyed it. A couple weeks later I was at work and realized, I had forgotten to bring a book to pass the time when we had no one visiting the museum.

I bought the Far Side of the Sea and could not put it down!

So of course I had to share the books with my book club:

So on to the third book:

The first book was the story of Protestant Rachel coming to Catholic California from the East coast, getting an arranged marriage to Roman Vasquez, befriending Roman’s sisters Maria and Isabella, and getting caught up in Bear Flag Revolt.

The second book was about Maria who gets kidnapped by Rachel’s father, raped, joins a shipping company, goes around the Americas, and ends up in the gentrifying/creating the lawful city of San Francisco. The second book is my favorite as it is an amazing story of overcoming trauma, working through past issues and insecurity, redemption, and has a powerful female character.

Chasing the Wind is the third installment and the story follows the path of Isabella Vasquez. Isabella is biracial (Native American and Russian), her mother died when she was a baby and her father, a fur trapper, brought her to Mission San Francisco Solano. There she was adopted by the Vasquez family, adopted cousin to Roman and Maria but raised as their sibling.

In the first book, she is a young girl who is one of Rachel’s first friends, spending time with her and giving her an education on the culture. With the Americans taking California, Isabella’s life is about to dramatically change. In the second book she has grown into a beautiful young woman, headed with her adopted father to the gold fields of Marysville, CA.

Marysville, for many who don’t know, was named after one of the survivors of the Donner Party and was the gateway to the gold fields. It used to be one of the largest cities in CA, a rival to San Francisco (until all the silt went into the river and made it hard for ships to pass through). You could get anything and everything you wanted in Marysville, but it was also a very hard place to live-especially for a woman-especially for a Native American woman. 

Peter Brondi is a mountain man who tamed the west with Kit Carson and John C. Fremont. He fought in the Mexican American War and against Native Americans. In fact he hates Native Americans for the horrors he witnessed and because one stole his father-he married one and had a son with her.

He’s currently searching for his half brother Paul, to bring him home and see their old and dying father. However, there is always time for cards and and he plays them winning the mining camp singer Bluebird-nickname for Isabella Vasquez.

Yes, once Isabella was the daughter of the rich Californio and now she is property-having lost her privilege and status when California changed hands.

I really enjoyed the way Paula Scott dealt with the cultural issues as there are very few books out there that cover this. We have a biracial character, raised in a completely different culture, and trying to navigate the changing culture of the state she lives in while trying to understand the identity of who she is in a world that there are hardly any like her.

Tell you what Isabella it’s almost 170 years later and it still is difficult for biracial and multicultural people.

So it doesn’t matter that Isabella is half Russian-Native American is all the world sees and how they treat her. She was educated, knows how to read and write, and speak multiple languages…but is treated like cattle. She is won by Peter, who is pressured into marrying her by a circuit preacher.

They have a night of passion-with sweet, naive, and young Isabella falling head over heels in love. The next day Peter drops her off at a brothel as he doesn’t believe they can really be married. I mean she was in a saloon and traveled the mining camps singing, there’s no way she is a classy lady-she must be a prostitute.

The brothel that she is dropped off at is still standing and now a restaurant, The Silver Dollar Saloon. We were able to meet with Paula Scott there and discuss this book along with the one she was currently working on Farming Grace: A Memoir of Life, Love, and a Harvest of Faith (which we read in September and I will review later).

Silver Dollar Saloon in Marysville, CA

When Peter left I was like this can’t be real, he’s going to march right back-but no. Isabella stays behind at the brothel earning her keep by reading to men and singing.

Poor Isabella, all she wanted was to belong to a family and then start her own. She lost hers, gained one with Peter…or so she thought. Now she has no one.

I’m so happy!

Peter leaves and Paul comes back to town. Paul falls for Isabella and every night tries to charm her more and more. Isabella is heartbroken, vulnerable, and alone.  Each night Paul breaks down more and more of her walls and she gives in to him.

But oh no…Paul leaves to get away from some card players he owes, Isabella turns out to be pregnant, she is attacked by a sadistic man, she flees to Fort Ross to search for her real father, Peter returns and discovers her “betrayal”, and Peter follows her-intent of finding her and doing right by her, but will they be able to reconcile after all that has transpired?

Tell ME!!!!!

So at first I was very angry with Peter. He left her in a brothel and then is angry because she started having sex with someone???!!! YOU LEFT HER IN A BROTHEL!!!! WHAT DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN???

But he does improve as you read. Scott created complex characters as Peter isn’t your usual hero and has to go on an emotional journey of working through envy, bitterness, prejudice, pride, iron out the issues with his father and brother in order to be a real man and a good husband.

Isabella has to go on her own journey to discover who she is, work on her abandonment issues, insecurity, forgiveness, bitterness, her own familial issues

Both are able to accomplish this by their faith and trust in God.

It was an amazing story! I highly recommend it! I LOVED it! I could not put it down as I consumed page after page in earnest to see how it would end. The characters are amazing and the story captivating.

For more Book Club Picks, go to Book Club Picks: Julie

For more Paula Scott, go to Book Club Picks: The Mother Keeper

For more California Rising books, go to Book Club Pick: Far Side of the Sea

For more Christian novels, go to Book Club Picks: Desperate Pastors’ Wives

For more bible verses, go to Literary Tea Parties

Drive Me Crazy: Austentatious (2015)

OH NO!

It’s Back!!!

The dreaded TV show I can’t stand:

Ugh-Austentatious (2015)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

Yes, I really, really do not like this show or how they portray the characters. But I started it, so I’ve got to finish it.

So Austentatious is the story of Elinor, Marianne, Emma, Elizabeth, and Mr. Knightley being friends in modern times. In the last episode Marianne was trying to find a job, but kind of sucked, although she did manage to be a smoothie barista.

Elizabeth went on a date with a guy and was crazily obsessing over it:

Going mad!

And they held a Girl’s Night/Mouse Killing Night:

I know…I have no clue what the writer’s were thinking.

I just…This is dumb! This is a dumb show!! Who wrote this? Who??? What were they thinking???!! Argh! Why did I ever watch this??!! NOw I have to finish!!!

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHH!!!!!!

This episode is called Drive Me Crazy and Amazon says the air date is DECEMBER 30TH 1899. 1899? Did we just time travel?

Time to go back…

This show does drive me crazy, like Norman Bates crazy.

We all go a little mad sometimes.

Is that too mean? I’m not trying to be a jerk but I hate this show. I can’t believe the episodes are only 22 mins, they feel so much longer. It feels like hours of my life is being sucked away in watching this.

Ugh! Really!

Anyways here we go-ready or not.

Pass on it!

We start off with a tired Marianne making a mess in the kitchen-food is everywhere but Elinor doesn’t care.

Crazy control freak Monk level of obsession Elinor does’t care about the messy hours-OMG she’s been abducted by aliens, joined a cult, is a zombie!!!! It has to be one of those things…or love. She could be in love as that is the extremely cliche way most TV will depict “love”.

Thats not right!

Yep, Edward is meeting with her-her dream man.

With her books

Collin approaches Elinor trying to reach Lizzie as he wants to date her. Elinor tries to dissuade him, but no dice. He’s after his prey.

In the lobby of their apartment I can’t help but see a GIANT sign that says no lifeguard on duty. Like what? Even if the apartment has a pool there is no way they would have that posted in the foyer unless there is a pool in the foyer. Like that is one of the weirdest randomest things in this show.

What the heck?

Lizzie goes to see Emma and is trying to avoid Darcy as he keeps calling and texting and emailing her about houses. Darcy is a total jerk in this, telling her what to do. Ugh I hate him.

I know what I said=BELIEVE ME you would understand if you watched this show. They make him utterly terrible!!!! I hate this!!!!!!

Elinor and Edward are traveling to the country to visit with an old lady who hasn’t filed her taxes for the last few years. Like the background is weird as it ranges from lush green to dry desert. Where are they? Behind them is green, but the sides are all arid and dry. I kinda tuned out what Elinor and Edward were saying as I couldn’t stop looking at the background. I don’t know. Does it really matter?

Darcy stalks Elizabeth down the street and calls her name. He’s a jerk and buys her a hotdog when she tries to explain that she is in the middle of closing a house. UGH!!!!!

Elinor and Edward are driving for a long time and talking. Elinor tells Edward how she decided on accounting because it was a safe choice- but then they get a flat and have to pull over.

They are in lush fields and trees, where are they? What happened to the dry and arid area?

This is ELINOR!! Don’t tell me the way they have been building Elinor’s character yeah right-she’d have five spare tires!

Darcy stops being quite so jerky and admits that the house he’s looking for is a gift for a certain woman who plays piano-not mom or girlfriend. Obviously Georgiana.

Flashback to Elinor and Edward-they have to walk to the city they passed-so where were they and where were they going if they were passing through another city?

Hmmm…

Elinor goes on and on about how nice Edward is-He shares a little about his company and that his family has a company in telecommunications, interesting choice.

Hmm…

Darcy and Elizabeth make some headway but are interrupted by Collin who sits right between them on the bench to try and ask Lizzie out. How did he find her? She’s not at home? Or at work? She’s in a random park! Creepy!!

Colin creepily hits on her and tries to feel her up, but Darcy interjects and walks off with Elizabeth. It stops Collin…for now.

Flash to E& E walking and talking and being boring. Bleh-IRS, Accountant, IRS, accountant, IRS, accountant, statistics, bills, blah blah blah blah blah.

Blah, blah

I need to mop my floors. Like that is legit more interesting to me than this.

Elizabeth meets with Emma at the smoothie shop and tells her about what happened. Darcy gets a kick out of Collin asking her out and can’t stop teasing her. Darcy drops that the house is a birthday gift for a girl next month so the house needs to be picked like NOW!

Darcy offers to pay the commission earlier, but Elizabeth gets offended and angry. She becomes extremely upset and shares her feelings with Emma. I don’t think what Darcy did was that bad, I think she’s overreacting.

I’m done

What’s Marianne been up to-she’s been out of the game this whole episode except the cereal eating.

Hmmm

Elizabeth keeps talking about Darcy and how he’s being rude or is he being nice? Meh!

Marianne enters and goes on break with Elinor coming in to share what happened and how great it was with Edward although their conversations are super boring.

Elinor does offer to make him her homemade lasagna. She then shares part of her power bar that she keeps in her purse! She-Miss Always Prepared has a power bar in her bag-she’d have more stuff in her car to fix the tire.

Edward notices that she has a blister and puts a band-aid on her foot. Cute, but all I can think is her feet probably smell.

Someone is running in the park? Oh it is Darcy and Collin just happened to find him?! What? HOw? Weird.

Collin is super super creepy-like psychopath horror film creepy. Watch out Lizzie-“we are meant to be together”-he wants to be like creepy Ted in Buffy the Vampire Slayer and enslave you in his home or something.

Yay! That’s the end of the episode. Although that was a super creepy ending.

He’s watching her…

How many more will I have to watch until it is over???? Let me check…

Yay!!!! Only four more left!! Woohoo!!! I’ve been doing an episode a month but skipped September, October, and now we are in November-so if I catch up with those and the do one for December I should hopefully finish before the new year!!!

But then if I do that, what Austen TV show should I review every month? Hmm….? I guess I’ll have to think about it. All I an say is YAY!!!!! Almost done!!! Woohooo!!!

For more Austentatious, go to Call Me, Maybe: Austentatious (2015)

For more Jane Austen film retellings, go to Mrs. Darcy Wants to Know the Truth!: Death Comes to Pemberley, Episode Three (2013)

For more Sense & Sensibility, go to Rational Creatures: Elinor & Marianne Dashwood

For more Pride & Prejudice, go to Rational Creatures: Elizabeth Bennet & Charlotte Lucas

For more Emma, go to Rational Creatures: Emma Woodhouse, Miss Bates, & Harriet Smith

Non-Austen Reads for Austen Readers: And Only to Deceive

So this is something I started a while back. Sometimes you want more Austen books after you have read all her books. There are variations on her stories, but you don’t always want to read the same story. You want Austen-like works, but what to read or watch?

Hmm…

That’s why I started this series. I will review books that have the things we love about the Austen novels, but in something fresher than a retelling.

And Only to Deceive (Lady Emily Mysteries #1) by Tasha Alexander

Lady Emily is a widow.

But she isn’t sad as she never loved her husband.

What?

Emily Ashton is an only daughter and all her life her mother has been plotting and planning and maneuvering, etc to get her daughter married off to a wealthy and eligible bachelor.

Emily chose Viscount Phillip Ashton for three reason:

  1. He seemed less chauvinistic than most men
  2. He appears to be someone she could live
  3. By marrying she would be free of her mother

Phillip was interested in pursuing her, was ecstatic at capturing his quarry, and not long after they married went on a big game hunt to Africa were he became sick and died.

Emily was actually happier after his death as:

  1. She didn’t really know her husband or spend time with him
  2. Was free of her mother
  3. Given freedom
  4. Has money
  5. Has large houses
  6. She had to absent from society for two years but that was okay as she didn’t really care for “society”.

Life was solitary but it wasn’t bad.

However, everything changed when her husband’s best friend came to visit after a year and a half. Mr. Colin Hargreaves came to speak to Emily about her Greek villa-all is in order, and she is free to go there anytime, just let him know and he will arrange the trip for her, Kallista.

Emily is completely surprised as her husband never said any such thing about villas and he never called her Kallista.

What?

Emily is baffled by this and even more when her butler let’s her know that he fired a footman who was digging in her late husband’s desk. She starts looking to see if anything is missing, although how would she know as she has never been in there really, and discovers a threatening note.

What the heck?

This is just the firsts in a series of instances that makes Emily realize she knew very little, if anything, about her husband. It turns out that he was an avid collector or Greek art and throughly knowledgeable of it and Greek history.

She also finds his journals and reads about his love for her (in incredibly sweet journal entries).

So cute!!

Emily’s interest is piqued and she begins reading Homer’s The Odyssey and researching into Greek art and mythology.

She discovers more things do not add up and that her husband was caught up in a fake antiquary ring. Could it be that he was duped, with all his knowledge and expertise? Or was he the ringleader?

Hmmm…

Emily cannot believe the later, as she reads her husband’s journals, she starts to fall in love with him, and remembers the wonderful and romantic gestures he would do, but took for granted at the time.

Emily isn’t sure who to trust, besides her old friend Ivy and new friend Lady Cécile du Lac. Colin Hagreaves spends a lot of time around her, and then she discovers that he has been watching her. Why? Could he be the ringleader?

Hmm…

Emily meets another friend of her late husband, Andrew Palmer. Andrew is fun, light, sarcastic, and likes to party and go out. He gives Emily a lot of attention and she enjoys it, as anyone who has been sent to the sidelines would. He is from noble stock, but no money. Could he be after her wealth, or is he really interested in her?

Colin and Andrew were both on the hunting trip with her husband, could one of them have killed him?

Hmmm

Then Emily gets a note about her husband being alive! Is he a criminal hiding out? Or was he betrayed by a friend and desperately in need?

Hmm…?

Emily sets off a plan to Africa, and will she be happy with what she finds? Or is she heading into a trap?

Hmm…

I really enjoyed this mystery as I liked that Emily was an independent woman with a strong personality and ideas about what she wanted, but at the same time she was still a woman of her times. I hate when people write historical fiction and the people are so much a product of our time. It makes zero sense.

So why would an Austen fan enjoy this? Well first of all, Lady Emily’s mother could be Mrs. Bennet. Both are soooo similar in the way they try to maneuver and manipulate their daughters into getting a good match. Both are driven by fear-Mrs. Bennet of Mr. Bennet’s death and no home or income; and Emily’s mother fears that her daughter will grow old single and childless. Emily and her mother; along with Elizabeth and Mrs. Bennet-do not have a very good relationship.

The book has these wonderful journal etries of Phillip’s love and his pursuit of her.  I LOVE how we see the total love he has for her. Those scenes were to me, very reminiscent of Captain Wentworth’s letter of love-both extremely romantic.

One theme throughout the book is how we can see one view of a person and think we know them, when in reality we know nothing as to who they really are. With Emily-she believed her husband was a hunter and hunted her, she never took the time to see more of who he was, We see the same thing in Jane Austen from Marianne seeing Willoughby do a few “romantic things” to believing he had a completely different character: to Emma believing from the stories about Frank and his few letters that he was noble and true; to Elizabeth and everyone disliking Mr. Darcy and loving Wickham. All saw one side of a person and believed they knew his true character only to in the end be wrong as there was much more to this men that what was seen at first sight.

Emily, Colin, and Andrew Palmer all remind me of several Austen triangles. Emily meets Colin and at first thinks him kind and interesting, but after he tries to warn her off her investigating she becomes angry and dislikes him. Instead she gives all her attention to Andrew Palmer, a pretty party boy who has name but no cash. He flatters, imbibes, resists tradition, has fun-but isn’t an honest or upstanding man. He paints a bad picture of Colin, something Emily should be wary of as she hardly knows Andrew, while Colin and Phillip were friends since boyhood. It reminded me of Elizabeth not liking Mr. Darcy, and believing Wickham’s view of Darcy instead of Bingley.

A pretty party boy with no money-we see this in Willoughby, Wickham, and Frank Churchill. All men care about the dollars and any way to get them-and all are sarcastic, critical, full of laughs-but laughing at other’s expense.

Plus, our main character loves Jane Austen:

“Finally I [Lady Emily] happened upon a bookstall that had a ragged secondhand copy of Pride and Prejudice, which I promptly bought. Phillip, engaged in some business of some kind, did not accompany me. Back at the hotel, I showed him my purchase and settled in for a nice read. The next morning at breakfast, he presented me with a beautifully wrapped parcel containing a first edition of the book.” -pg 141

Sounds like my kind of gift!

For more Non-Austen Reads for Austen Readers, go to Book Club Picks: Julie

For more book reviews, go to Jane Austen: Her Heart Did Whisper

Matcha Green Tea Blast Smoothie

So a while back I shared my love of Matcha tea and how to make your own Matcha Latte

Well of course after Jamba Juice added their Matcha Green Tea Blast Smoothie to the menu, I had to buy it!

But I’m not made of money, so I had to find a way to make my favorite drink for less-so here is a way to make it at home. This recipe comes from makedrinks.org

Ingredients:

  • 1 Tsp of Matcha Green Tea Powder
  • 1 Cup of Milk (your choice)
  • 1/2 Cup of Plain Sorbet
  • 1/2 Cup of Frozen Vanilla Yogurt
  • 1 Cup of Ice

Directions:

  1. Place ingredients in blender and blend.

Sorry my picture didn’t come out nice as I would have liked it. But this smoothie is fantastic!

I’m addicted to the Matcha:

For more recipes, go to Amish Baked Oatmeal

For more Matcha Tea posts, go to Green Tea Frappuccino

For more tea posts, go to I Won the Two Sisters Tea Giveaway

For more smoothies, go to Earl Grey Infused Blueberry Smoothie

Jane Austen: Her Heart Did Whisper

Jane Austen: Her Heart Did Whisper by Manuela Santoni

So we added this at the library and I was jazzed for it-Jane Austen biography? In graphic novel?

It seems like a win win to me!

But it wasn’t-I did not like it.

I’ve read several Jane Austen biographies, books and online, and I really enjoyed read Just Jane last year. I do not know everything about Jane, but I feel enough to know that this had quite a bit of historical inaccuracies it.

Hmmm

It also felt like they wanted to make her “ahead of her times” but it just feels like something we have seen before and not as if the author really was trying to show Jane, who this book is supposed to be about. Like how Nostalgia Critic words it in the Alice in Wonderland review.

It starts off with Jane sick at the end of her life writing a letter and thinking back on her life.

Hmm…

We go back to them as girls and Jane hates the piano playing:

But in reality, she enjoyed piano playing. From The Jane Austen Centre:

“Jane, studied with the respected composer and organist, William Chard well into her twenties, long after most girls would have given up their lessons. After that point, it was up to the student to progress if she wished, on her own. Jane owned a small piano at various times during her life and, when this was not an option, rented one. She played for her own enjoyment and would rise an hour before the rest of the family in order to get her practicing done.”

And Santoni has her hate doing embroidery:

But she was extremely talented at it, most likely loved it. From Jane Austen’s House Museum:

“Like all women of her time and class, Jane Austen learnt to sew in childhood and gained a life-long skill. Sewing was something she was particularly good at. In 1796 Austen wrote in a letter that she was “the neatest worker” of a group making shirts for one of her brothers. Edward Austen-Knight remembered of his aunt that “Her needlework both plain and ornamental was excellent, and might almost have put a sewing machine to shame. She was considered especially great in satin stitch.”

And I am currently reading Praying With Jane: 31 Days Through the Prayers of Jane Austen by Rachel Dodge and she shares this in Day 5:

“From this description, we see that while Jane sat and worked (needlework) quietly, lines, descriptions, and plot ideas for her novels came to her in delightful bursts.”

“She [Jane Austen] could have declared needlework a boring, repetitive task and herself too intelligent for such menial jobs. Instead she appears to have spent the time in happy reflection.”

I am so sick and tired of authors being like, oh I want my historical character to be modern and powerful so she will hate embroidery. Why? Why is music revered, painting treated as a superpower, sewing something to be proud of-but embroidery is treated like dirt. Embroidery is a lot of hard work, amazing art, and takes blood, sweat, and sometimes tears to create.

Santoni gives Jane unruly curled hair that just seems to show again that she is “modern” eschewing society’s idea of how women should be.

So the story has Jane proposed to twice and she turns them both down, but in real life she only officially ever received one formal proposal, when she was 27, from Harris Bigg-Wither-but the next day refuses him.

Santoni also has Jane fall in love with Tom Lefoy, he propose, she accepts, and then turn him down as she can’t be a wife and mother but has decided to be a writer. Now there is a bit of leeway here as Cassandra Austen destroyed a lot of Jane’s letters, but she seems to ignore what history we do know.

Thats not right!

It even says at the end of the book “many suitors asked for my hand…” I found this hard to believe as there is no historical proof to confirm this, along with the fact that she had no dowry and very little to entice someone to marriage. I felt like did Santoni do any research? She says she is a Jane Austen fan, but it seems she was making up her own story and characters.

Yeah, not as good as Just Jane

For more Jane Austen biographies, go to Just Jane

For more Jane Austen inspired books, go to Rational Creatures: Catherine Morland, Eleanor Tilney, & Lady Susan

For more Jane Austen inspired work, go to Northanger Soapworks Review