Women are Like Werewolves

So I’m back from my mini vacation with my niece, and my review of the second half of The Buccaneers, isn’t finished. So we will have a brief intermission with this post.

Have you ever noticed that women are like werewolves?

Huh?

I know some of you might find it weird, rude, and possibly offensive for me to suggest it-but hear me out. I have shared this on twitter before-but thought I would go a bit more in-depth on here.

So I’m on my period, and I’ve talked about this before-it sucks.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up.

And every time it comes the same thought enters my mind. A woman on her period is like a werewolf.

So werewolves-they are affected by a full moon which happens to be about 4-6 days once a month (sometimes two if the days fall a certain way.)

Women have their period once a month (sometimes two if the month falls a certain way or stressful situations arise) and it lasts about 4-7 days. Hmm…

Hmm…

When a werewolf changes he has no control over his emotions or body. They get hairy, larger, claws, etc They can’t fit in their clothes right-it seems like none of the tops ever fit, only the pants-barely.

And for us ladies on our period-acne, aches and pains, I always feel I’m more hairier, and I feel gigantic in everything. I can’t go clothes shopping as I’m bloated and there are certain clothes that do not fit.

Ugh!

And it isn’t a painless process either. Like I hate modern adaptions where the werewolves change and it is no sweat, in legend and original films the transformation was a painful thing.

And same for us ladies. Every time my period comes, constant pain.

No joke this enters m mind every month

Not to mention the anger. Original werewolf tales-angry, furious, and can’t control it.

I Was a Teenage Werewolf

When I’m on my period-watch out!

When one is transformed into a werewolf, they crave strange substances-human blood, flesh, raw meat…

And I don’t know about you, but when I’m on my period I start craving the strangest things. I’m not really a sugar person but on my period all I can think of is candy, cake, pie, brownies, etc. And I’m not a big meat eater-mostly vegetarian, but whenever my period comes-I’m dreaming of steak, burgers, pepperoni and sausage pizza, etc. And I want to eat all the time.

I know some of you think I’m crazy, but I’m not.

I just think us women are like werewolves.

I hope you all enjoyed this silly post, and of you have anything for me to add, leave a comment.

For more werewolf posts, go to Mr. Hyde Versus the Werewolf: Dr. Jekyll Versus the Werewolf (1972)

For more period posts, go to Period Days are Reading Days

 

Man, She Sure Looks Great in Clothes

“Man, she sure looks great in clothes

-Steve Burkett, Move Over, Darling (1963)

So Doris Day passed away!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

I love Doris Day, I grew up watching her movies with my mom and listening to her sing.

Noo!

Noo!

She was amazing-sweet, kind, adorable, a fantastic singer. I can’t believe she is gone.

So I couldn’t let her death pass by and not honor her. Yes, I am going to list off ten of my favorite films.

The quote and title, you all are probably wondering about, and it took me quite some time to settle on one. I didn’t want to go the “Que sera, que sera” route and started looking through her films to try and find the perfect quote. I choose this one because whenever my friend and I watch her films, we are always like-she is so beautiful, and we love her clothes.

Seriously, Doris Day is one of the best dressed ladies in film. Gorgeous outfits.

YEEEEES!!!!!!

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10) Beverly Boyer from The Thrill of it All (1963)

Doris Day plays wife of famous gynecologist (James Garner) and is used to long nights by herself and missing her husband. When she calls a company to tell them how much her children enjoyed their “Happy Soap”, she ends up becoming the spokesperson and a HUGE star. Now the roles are reversed as her hubby finds himself missing his wife, nights alone, and getting to hear everyone talk about how great his spouse is.

So I have issues with this movie as I don’t like how her husband is zero supportive of her, from the getgo. Geez, you need to hangout with Jason Seaver from Growing Pains and learn how to be there for your wife. So this would be a meh except that it works because of Day and Garner. Day is fun as she starts off innocent, unsure, and blossoms into a fantastic star. She and Garner sizzle with chemistry and comedy, making this film work. An as a star and face of “Happy Soap” she gets gorgeous gowns.

9) Ruth Etting from Love Me or Leave Me (1955)

So this film is extremely different from her other films and sooo sad. The story is a fictionalized account of Ruth Etting, dance hall girl turned singer-a woman who kicked, clawed, and climbed her way to the top. And she didn’t do it herself, it all started with the gangster Martin “Moe the Gimp” Synder. He intimidates lots of people to move her ahead, although eventually she makes it on her own. Their relationship is extremely abusive…with lots of ups and downs.

Doris Day wasn’t sure about making this film as it was so different from the other films she made, and darker content. But Doris Day shines in singing, dancing, and really becomes the character-astonishing as she is nothing you’d expect. I mean I was just like-huh? Wha? Watching it as it is just beyond the realm of what I thought Doris Day would do. It was amazing, and she has gorgeous Roaring Twenties clothes, just like that dress (which incidentally I have one just like that my sister made for me.

8) Calamity Jane from Calamity Jane (1953)

Doris Day is Calamity Jane-a sharpshooter who wears men’s clothing, fights Native Americans, spends time in the saloon, gambles, saves damsels in distress, etc. In a series of comedic events she is given the task of bringing actress Adelaid Adams from Chicago to Deadwood, but accidentally mistakes Adelaid’s maid, Katie Brown, for the singer. She and Calamity room together, and Katie tries to change Calamity’s ways, attempting to feminize her. Katie has also has attracted the attentions of “Wild Bill” Hickok and Lt. Daniel Martin, the latter being the man Calamity is in love with. Uh, oh! The fight is on!

I have mixed feelings on this film as Calamity does silly things, such as being frightened by a cigar Indian and thinking wigs are scalps; but at the same time Calamity still remains an independent, strong-willed character who refrains from changing herself for anyone. She is strong, tough, and does all the cowboy heroics that men usually were given to do instead of women.

7) Josie Minick from The Ballad of Josie (1967)

So I haven’t seen this movie in a looooong time, but it stuck hard in my mind. Josie is a widow who is taking a different stand with her land. Instead of raising cattle-in the cattle run area-and is raising sheep! Cattle vs. Sheep was a huge battle in the West-blood was spilled! The cowman and the sheepherder are not friends! Josie also takes things further when she starts pushing women’s suffrage, getting the wives and daughters stirred up about their rights, and WEARS PANTS!

I loved this as I loved Western films and though Josie was awesome! My favorite scene I remember is the pants wearing scene. I couldn’t find any video clips or anything, but it cracked me up! I know this wasn’t one of Day’s favorite, but I loved it.

6) Janet Harper from Do Not Disturb (1965)

Janet and her devastatingly handsome husband, played by Rod Taylor, move to London as he takes over a fashion company. She wants to live in the country (he in the city) and works on restoring an old house and befriending woodland creatures like the Disney Princess she is. Her husband is too preoccupied with work to give her any attention, and him being surrounded by beautiful models makes Day feel queasy. She decides to get his attention by using the attentions of the interior decorator to make him jealous. Things go too far when her husband knocks the decorator out, and storms off to another country. In order to make things up to him, she sneaks into a party as a mistress and things seem to get better, only to fall apart again. Will the Harpers finally be able to get it together, or will the ensuing comedy continue to separate.

So the plot isn’t that original, in fact it is very similar to Please Don’t Eat the Daises, but this movie rocks as it is just plain hilarious. I love Day and Taylor together, they just work so well with the slapstick and the lines. Day does the outward comedy and slapstick, while Tatlor does it with his facial expressions and sarcasm-they are just fantastic. I think if it were anyone else paired up, it wouldn’t be as good. And that dance scene is hilarious! And of course with a husband in the fashion industry, her clothes are amazing.

5) Kate Robinson MacKay from Please Don’t Eat the Daises (1960)

So this film is so high up on my list because of nostalgia-I used to watch this all the time growing up and had the titular song memorized. Professor Laurence MacKay (David Niven) is leaving the academic world to become a drama critic. His wife, Kate (Doris Day), is at first thrilled for him, but as he becomes more sought after and being invited to parties nearly every night; she starts to wonder if the fame will go to his head and that he will change for the worse. When the lease comes up on their apartment, and they find themselves going to homeless, they decide to live their dream of being in the country. However, Laurence finds it hard adjusting to country life and the constant repairs of the house. Kate sends him back to New York to finish his book, while she completes the house. Throw in the mix a Broadway writer angry at his bad review plotting revenge on the MacKays and a starlet setting out to seduce Laurence; and you have one highjink-filled film.

So the Professor acts like a major jerk through most of the film, while Day is awesome as she smart, funny, independent, artistic/crafty. I love how she works on the house, cares for the children, helps out at the school, taking care of the animals-and remains energetic, warm, and a breath of sunshine. Her husband does barely anything, and is all-I’m bushed, wah. I love how they have this awful play they are trying to put it on, and even though you recognize it as bad-she still makes it look good.

For more on Please Don’t Eat the Daises, go to With a Little Luck of the Irish: 17 More Irish Heroes 

4) Elizabeth Wagstaff Arden from Move Over Darling (1963)

Nick and his wife Elizabeth were on a boat that crashed in a storm. Elizabeth (or her body) wasn’t found and five years of constant searching has revealed nothing. Nick has decided to have her declared legally dead and has remarried. The very same day as his second wedding, Elizabeth has finally been discovered on her desert island she washed up on, and returned home. Now Nick finds himself in a tough predicament-married to two wives!

This movie is a remake of a favorite of mine, My Favorite Wife-starring Cary Grant and Irene Dunn. Now you all know I’m not a fan of remakes, but I love this movie. It is fun, hilarious, and once again-Garner and Day do spectacular in the physical comedy. I love when he can’t bring himself to say what happened, and pretends he injured his back. Or when he is calling for Mrs. Arden, and the clerk is all which one? Paging for Mrs. Arden-which one? Hilarious!

For more Move Over, Darling, go to You’re My Wife and the Mother of My Children: Move Over Darling (1963)

3) Jennifer Nelson from The Glass Bottom Boat (1966)

Jennifer Nelson is a widow who works for NASA during the week and on the weekends swims dressed up as a mermaid for her dad’s glass bottom boat business. Bruce Templeton, NASA’s genius working on top secret inventions, spots her and learns all he can to win her-lying about a few things. He tries to pursue her, but the government is leery as they fear she is a spy. When Jennifer finds out about Bruce’s duplicitous behavior, she decides to get back at him and ends up caught in a spy ring!

As stated above, Day and Taylor work amazing together. They have great energy and chemistry. I love them. And this movie is just so funny, like I can’t describe how much-you NEED to watch it. I love when she decides to get back at him, better not be playing her-she’s gonna get you back. I LOVE it!

For more on The Glass Bottom Boat, go to Mata Hari Stops At Nothing. Nothing Comes Between Mata Hari and What She Wants: The Glass Bottom Boat (1966)

2) Cathy Timberlake from That Touch of Mink (1962)

Cary Grant is a handsome billionaire that is trying to romance the everyday girl-Cathy (Doris Day). Grant just wants an affair, while Day’s character wants marriage. He tries to take her on a weekend away-which goes comedically awry, same when Day tries to go after him. A crazed opy machine, a scheming brother trying to marry off Grant, and a plan to reunite the lovers that is probably the worst thought one ever made.

This movie is just so funny. Day plays the comedic part so well, while Grant is the straight man. She is limbs, raised voices, stumbling around-while he is cool, collected, and sarcastic. Just so many funny scenes like her getting drunk to be with Grant and falling out the window, her making too many copies-filing the room, Grant’s brother trying to get them together, etc. I LOVE it!

1) Georgia Garrett from Romance on the High Seas (1948)

This is Day’s first film, and it is amazing! A husband and wife are extremely jealous and suspect each other of cheating. The wife plans a cruise to Rio, and hires Georgia (Day) to go in her place, while she remains in town to spy on her husband. Her husband is suspicious that she might be trying to met up with a man, so he sends a P.I. to watch her, Peter Virgil. The two fall for each other, but finds themselves in a moral quandary as Georgia is “married”, and Peter is working. Will everything work out, or get even more muddled?

OMG this film is so funny and so much fun. I LOVED it, it is probably my favorite as it has everything-romance, comedy, music, and just all around fun. FANTASTIC! And of course this was the film that got her noticed, and signed!

So there we go, 10 fabulous films starring one amazing person. And if you noticed all of her movies-amazing clothes.

No, but on a serious note-we are sorry to see you go, were amazing actress, singer, humanitarian, and person.

The Conscripted Seamstress

From the Madsen Creations tumblr: Fashion Inspiration Journal

So I do not sew-not at all. I have tried to do it and have failed again and again. Sewing is just not for me. I get completely flabbergasted.

From the Madsen Creations tumblr: Fashion Inspiration Journal

I am like Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality, when I look at the sewing machine and the instruments.

So those of you who follow me on instagram and facebook may have seen my embroidery, and might be wondering, isn’t that the same thing as sewing?

Sewing is about construction-in clothing or accessories. Typically you are joining two pieces of fabric together to make something or mending a hole or frayed edge.

Embroidery is about style-you are adding careful and intricate stitching to something, to elevate a pillowcase, dishcloth, blanket, or other home goods.

So embroidery is something I know how to do, my mom taught us young and I have embroidered pillows, dishcloths, pillowcases, blankets, baby shirts, etc. After all:

So last week my friend was getting married and she was planning on saving money by wearing her mother’s old dress.

I told her to try it on months before, just in case it didn’t fit, but she didn’t. On Thursday, two nights before the wedding, she tried the dress on and it didn’t fit.

They weren’t able to add more cloth to it, instead a new dress had to be made. Friday, the day before the wedding.

But my sister, she went to work and created a dress in a day.

What?

After the dress rehearsal, I went over to my parent’s house and saw my sister sewing on appliques to the dress. If she was to be doing it on her own, she was going to be up all night and we were supposed to be at the church at 9 on Saturday.

Ouch!

So my mom lent a hand and then they conscripted me into service.

Like I said sewing is not for me, and I kept messing up. I threaded the needle wrong and it kept falling out. And I was moving so slow…

We stayed up until two in the morning and my sister and mother did lots of appliques…but in the four hours I sewed….I did one.

Yes, this is why I don’t sew. But I was pretty proud of my one applique.

For more on sewing, go to Desire & Decorum: Chapter 3, Threading the Needle

For more embroidery, go to Jane Austen Manors

For more on weddings, go to Crazy Rich Asians

A Water-Logged White Christmas

So every year my family goes and cuts down a Christmas tree. And this year, things did not go as expected.

So it rained.

Which was good. California really needed it. But because of fire and storm the place we usually go to was closed.

So we had to drive over an hour away, wait an hour to process for permits (never had to do that before), and then drive another hour away.

When we got there, the snow was super deep. The banks went up to your knees and thighs, depending on the area. It was such hard work. We couldn’t drive up to the tree cutting allowed area, as the snow was so deep, we had to hike in.

NoooooooooooooooS

While it was raining, which turned into sleet-and snow.

So it was hard to look for a tree with the snow, as my family we all wear glasses-so quickly fogged up and covered in rain.

Then the chainsaw broke so we are all sitting out there standing in the snow and getting even more soaked then we already were.

We finally got the tree, but the rest of the group couldn’t help, so my sister and I are trying to drag this huge 14 foot tree through the crazy deep snow.

Ugh

And finally we were ready to go. It was so wet that my gloves were full of water and falling off of me, my jacket so soaked it was drippingly full-the rain had gotten through my coat and on my shirt, pants and leggings, etc. I felt like Marianne Dashwood.

[after Marianne has first met Willoughby]

Elinor: Marianne, you must change. You will catch a cold.

Marianne: What care I for colds when there is such a man.

Elinor: You will care very much when your nose swells up.

Marianne: You are right. Help me, Elinor.

But even though it was a lot of work-and we all were soaked it was still fun. Even though after we got home, changed, and ate-all I wanted to do was sleep.

For more stories on cutting down our Christmas tree, go to Winter Wonderland

For more Marianne Dashwood, go to The Austen Series: Reason and Romance

Which One of These is Lipstick?

Makeup…why is it so hard.

I am completely inadequate, I mean most of the time I feel like Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality. 

I mean I know foundation, eyeshadow, lipstick, eyeliner, mascara; but once they get into priming, contouring, etc-you lose me.

Help me! I’m confused!

In fact my sister bought me a full set of like 20 brushes, and I am completely confused as to what to use them a for. I mean four are easily identifiable, but the rest? What do you need them for?

Huh?

Or I went to buy lipgloss from the store, and when I got there, there was over fifty shades. How am I supposed to know which one to choose? Which is my color?

In fact I am going to have to get help from a friend to figure it out. but I guess that is life-this is how it will always be:

A Real Non-Party Animal

Who likes big parties?

Not me.

I hate large parties. I always feel uncomfortable as I am not good with small talk.

Especially if it is mostly people I don’t know:

Or people I don’t know well.

I’m an introvert so the whole big party thing, I find completely overwhelming. Usually I do one of two things: Hang out at the snack table/buffet:

Or unsure

It is one of the best places to be as you don’t have to talk (food in mouth) and you don’t feel awkward as you have something to do. But sadly, you can’t spend the whole party eating.

So the other place I wind up with is children.

They are just easier for me to connect with and feel more comfortable. But even that doesn’t always work out, as what about parties that don’t have any kids?

In those situations, I usually find myself sitting alone and wishing I had a book to read.

Small parties made up of a bigger ratio of people I know, I am great with. I can turn my introverted nature into be an extrovert and have a good time.

But any other situation, and I am ready to go as soon as I can.

I’m out!

I guess I’m just a real no-party animal, and that’s okay with me.

For more on my lack of partying, go toWhen You Shockingly Relate to Mr. Woodhouse 

For more Jane Austen Quotes, go to A Visit to Highbury: Another View of Emma

GISHWHESing Away

So GISHWHES is over.

It was hard this time. First of all, the friend I always do it with was out of the country.

So I had to try and find others to pinch in with me. That meant I wasn’t able to do as much as I would have liked.

I also got sick

And my phone broke: which made it so I couldn’t do the things I needed to, I couldn’t contact anyone, and I had to redo an item.

And then when I tried to upload a video, youtube wouldn’t process it.

Argh!

But now it is over.

I had a lot of fun with it. I put E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial in Jello. (Which was really hard, heavy, and took ALL DAY! 😦

Sorry E.T, you are going nowhere!

I painted seven rocks with encouraging words on them and left them in areas that are in need of hope. They looked really cool! My favorite, of course, was this one:

I turned a grocery cart into a spaceship and helped an “alien” collect specimens.

I also dressed up as a Ghostbuster and took care of a pesky ghost at my local library.

That’s how I roll

Made a child’s idea of happiness come true.

Broke a rule

Made my own Scavenger Hunt list

Created cars out of boxes and did human nascar. This was fun, I made a Herbie, the Love Bug:

The 1966 Batmobile (Adam West TV show):

The 1967 Impala from Supernatural:

The Ecto-1

Lighting McQueen

And much more! It was a lot of fun and I’m glad this one is done with, but sad the whole thing is over. Apparently this was the last GISHWHES  they are ever going to do.

Well, now things can settle down and go back to normal. Or at least I hope so.

 For more on GISHWHES, go to Tired With a Capital T

Don’t Let My Size Fool You

Ever hear don’t judge a book by its cover, it might surprise you? Well, I’m the same thing. Except for me its my size. I’m only 5’3 so people often think that I’m a weakling or need help.

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But I’m a firecracker and a lot tougher than what you see at first glance.

littlefierce

Looks also don’t help as everyone thinks I’m 17 (or sadly sometimes younger).

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But hey, even though the body looks like a baby, I have experience and intelligence in my brain that makes up for the lack of marks on my face or height.

thought you would be older

So don’t let my size fool you.

For more on being short, go to These Shoes Were Made for Walking

For more on being a baby face, go to Clothes Make the Woman

For more Princess Leia, go to A New Hope

For more on William Shakespeare, go to You’re Just Too Good Too Be True: 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Viva Las Vegas

So I know you’ve probably been wondering, what’s going on? Where have I been? Have I just crashed from my Valentine’s Day postings?

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Well not exactly. I’m sure you have seen on the news how crazy the weather in California has been. We actually had to evacuate the area for fear of flooding.

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Headed up more north, where I connected to the internet and was able to finish the Valentine’s Day countdown. Then we returned home, as no water had overflowed, repacked and planned to head down to Southern California to wait out the evacuation.

I'm outta here

I’m outta here

But they were going to get the worse storm in 20 years. We decided to skip it, which was good as everyone I knew house’s got flooded.

Not good

Not good

So we were trying to decide where to head next, when Las Vegas was just randomly chosen. There we headed out in a trailer, with my cat (as I wasn’t leaving her) for Sin City.

I'd never leave you.

I’d never leave you.

Now I’ve never really had a desire to go to Vegas. I like gambling, but just for fun. Anytime money is involved I lose; if we play for fun, chores, candy-I’m golden.

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If money-

idon'tgotthis

But that is where everyone wants to go, so we went. Well it took a day to get there as California is huge.

What?!

What?!

We got there around five, but were too tired we just stayed there in the trailer resting.

Draculasleep

The next day it poured! Like crazy pouring, like monsoon weather. It was so crazy and we were so tired of the water that we decided to just stay in again.

Saturday and Doing Nothing

The next day was sunny, but cool which was nice, and we decided to head out. But you know me, I’m not normal.

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Now what I wanted to see more than anything was the mob museum.

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It was AMAZING! Tri-level, with information from the early years to present time. It was chock full of information on the 1920s to the 60s. The later years focused more on the police and FBI. It was extremely interactive with video in a replica of the Las Vegas courthouse, depicting the hearings and using actual furnture from the time period.

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They had practice with weapons, a fake tommy gun that you could pretend shoot:

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and the wall from the St. Valentine’s Massacre that was brough over and reassembled brick by brick. You could see the bullet holes.

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There is so much more, I barely even skimmed the surface in this review of all the amazing things this building has to offer. If you are ever there you should check it out as it was AMAZING!

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After that we drove down the strip looking at all the lighted signs and buildings.

What?!

Wow!

The next day we hit the casinos, but not to play.

Whattheheck

Yep, I wanted to look at all the architecture.

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Hey, I told you I was different.

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I loved looking at them, and spent hours walking and checking them all out. Unfortunately, I didn’t get to see everything, but I tried my best. My favorite was probably Caesar’s Palace. I loved the extensive details in recreating the roman architecture. It was beautiful. As a former Art History student, I was enthralled.

They even have a life-size replica of Michelangelo’s David, made from the same marble as the original.

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Michaelangelo purposely made this disproportionate as it was supposed to me placed high above on a roof in Florence, so that all could see it.

The sculpture is designed to show David’s warrior soul, not actual physical age, that is why is so muscular and strong. It was also designed to be right before he throws the slingshot, his face in fierce contemplation. It is amazing the way Michelangelo is able to create life out of stone.

The Flamingo is the oldest casino on the strip. It was created by the mobster Bugsy Siegal and his friends and the reason for his death. It was taking too long to build, using too much money, and many believed Bugsy was skimming off the top. Never try to cheat the mob, they will always take you out.

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The Paris Casino was also amazing as it tried hard to replicate the city-from the Arc de Triomphe, to the “cobblestone” floors, to the Rococo style artwork and Salon furniture.

What?!

Wow

And it was cool looking at the Bellagio first hand instead of just a movie, like Ocean’s Eleven.

But there was one big disappointment for me.

Laura Angry Mad Upset

So you all know how much I love Elvis, I am a super fan.

ElvisPresleypandemonium

So I was looking for an Elvis themed souvenir in all the souvenir shops on the strip. But I couldn’t find anything!

SayWhat

I know, right?! I searched every where and was getting desperate…at this point I would have bought anything.

So cool, I want it to be true.

But there was nothing, nada, zip!

Life'sNotFairPrincessBride

I know, crazy! No Elvis in Vegas! No nothing! Not even an impersonator! Not a copy of the film Viva Las Vegas!

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

Oh well, I could probably find something cheaper online.

Supernaturaldean whinchester shrug smile oh well

But hey, just because I missed out doesn’t mean you should. So Elvis, take us out:

ElvisPresleyDanceDancing

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For more on Vegas, go to A Fantabulous Post

For more on the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, go to You’re Sad So I’m Making This Day Extra Special: The Bikini in the Soup, Bones (2011)

For more on Michelangelo, go to The Death of Christ

For more Elvis, go to Someone is Killing By Copying Old Murders!: Real Murders

Eye Guess I Won’t Be Seeing You

So I hate going to the doctors. You have to wait forever, and then they give you a millisecond after all the paperwork and time spent with dumb old magazines.

doctorhatedoctors

There is only one doctor I don’t mind visiting, the eye doctor/optometrist.

Say What

I only go once a year, I get in fast, spend some time looking through lenses at a sign on the wall; and then I’m out and off with my life.

No problem at all.

No problem at all.

This time however things were a little different.

OhNOthisisgonnabebad

So I went in for my yearly visit as I have to buy new glasses. My old ones the bridge is messed up and scratching my nose and irritating my skin.

glassesnotafashionaccessory

While I was there the doctor asked me if she could dilute my eyes.

UHHHHHHHH!!!!

UHHHHHHHH!!!!

I had no idea what that was but since she had never done it and I have to do it every so many years I agreed.

I don't need it.

I don’t need it.

I asked if I needed to call a ride or anything, but she said I should be fine to drive. It was mostly going to affect my vision of things close up, like reading, but far away should be okay.

startrekletsgetstarted

She then pulled out this weird creepy headpiece that looked like it was from a horror film or something.

totalrecall3

She put the drops in my eyes and of course wore the headpiece and checked me out.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

I passed, but afterwards things were weird.

weirdtwilightzone

It was so hard to read anything, I felt like a 40 year old woman or something. I could only look at things after they were a foot away from my body.

see cute guy look

I had such a hard time paying my bill.

idon'tgotthis

The light was also super bright in the store.

The light burns.

The light burns.

I was told that it would be blinding outside and given special lens to wear under my glasses. I walked outside and the light was crazy bright in my face. I had to shut my eyes and pull out the lenses to block out the pain.

It burns

It burns

I felt like a vampire or something.

Dracula

I tried to drive, but the power of the sun was just too strong I had to call for a ride.

idon'tgotthis

Having your eyes diluted is one of the weirdest things ever. Your pupil is so big and black you look possessed or something.

DemonDean MonsterSupernatural

I had to shun the light and the day, instead becoming a creature of the night.

But something terrible lurks inside.

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For more doctor visits, go to Avengers Assemble

For more on glasses, go to Not a Hipster, But an O.F.

For more stories on my everyday life, go to My Trip to Teavana

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Now in other news, today is a very special day in our world & nation’s history. I would just like to take the time to give a shout out to all the veterans who have served, and all the troops currently serving.  Thank you so much for everything you have done and for all the sacrifices you have made. I am so happy to live in a country that gives honor to those who deserve it for all that they do. Happy Veteran’s Day!

freedomlibertyneverforgetMrSmithgoestowashington