I Will Get You What You Need: I’m With Lucy (2002)

Most Romantic Moment #7

I’m With Lucy (2002)

I saw this movie at the library and had to check it out as it has David Boreanaz, you know Angel from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and FBI Agent Booth from Bones.

So the movie starts off with Lucy picking up her friend-who has just been horribly dumped and hates all men-to take her somewhere. Lucy knows what that is like as that was her a year ago-but today she is getting married.

Huhhhhhhh

Yes, this is one of the weirdest openings. How come she didn’t tell her friend before? Anyways, Lucy felt the same but then she was set up on five dates:

  1. Date #1: Doug the Entomologist (John Hannah) who Lucy sees right after she is dumped and she is horribly drunk on the date, but they do have some meaningful conversations throughout.
  2. Date #2: Gabriel (Gael García Bernal) is Spanish and a passionate playwright, who Lucy sleeps with right away.
  3. Date #3: Bobby (Anthony LaPaglia) a former baseball player who is incredibly narcissistic, but after they spend time together she realizes there is more to him.
  4. Date #4: Barry (Henry Thomas) a computer salesman who’s date occurs right after Lucy has had a horrible time getting her fridge delivered, is in the middle of an awful allergy attack and can’t find her medicine in any pharmacy-and to make it worse the date gets hijacked by her parents as they convince the two to join them for dinner.
  5. Date #5: Luke (David Boreanaz) is a doctor, who is extremely hot-but their date gets shanghaied  when a colleague of Luke’s invites them to join them and his daughter goes after Luke.

Lucy goes on all these dates and eventually narrows it down to two men. But which one will win her heart?

Most Romantic Moment: I Will Get You What You Need

So I know you’ve probably been on bad dates-and have seen a lot in comedy films and TV shows, but I think this movie takes the cake. This date starts off incredibly bad with Lucy angry about the fridge not being delivered and starts yelling at Barry-who yells back when she gets really rude.

Then they go to multiple stores as Lucy needs a certain allergy medication, but can’t find it. Whenever Barry suggests another medication, she turns it down as it isn’t the right one. Both are extremely angry and annoyed. After the two have a bit of a blowout, they decide to start over as this date is going nowhere near like how either thought.

Barry: Okay. Let’s start this thing over.

Lucy: Fine. Hi Barry, its nice to meet you. I don’t have a refrigerator.

Then they run into Lucy’s parents who guilt them into coming with them-in which they serve them good food for dinner but they completely embarrass Lucy.

So embarrassed

But the two have a lot of fun. And Barry comes to see Lucy the next day with the allergy medication she needed. He went to 10 different pharmacies, 10 different ones to find it for her.

How romantic!

I don’t know about you all but I know very few people who would do that-that’s true love there.

For more with David Boreanaz, go to I’d Risk My Life to Save Yours: Earshot, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1999)

The Puppet Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997)

So sorry to post so late, but I have a really good excuse.

Yes! Really! So a week ago I wrote this post, and then scheduled it-all it needed was some editing and it was good to go. But then my parents had to go out of town and I ended up getting their tickets to A Woman’s Friend banquet, in which Robia LaMorte Scott spoke. Yes, Robia LaMorte who played Jenny Calendar on Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

I know what are the odds of these happening on the same day?!

Wow

They weren’t originally going to have her either. It was going to be Ashley Bratcher, star of the movie Unplanned, but something came up and they asked fellow Unplanned actress Robia LaMorte Scott to fill in. Crazy, right!

Her flight was actually delayed so it made me get home late.

Sorry, but at the same time, I’m not sorry as I really enjoyed hearing her speak. But enough on that, let’s move on to the review. It friday so that means a TV episode…

So it is time for another Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode.

So I had a hard time choosing a Buffy episode this year as I have already reviewed the creepiest episode (at least in my opinion) of BVS.

And with both Netflix and Amazon not having it anymore, I was at a loss what to pick.

But then the library saved the day. At my library we have 5 seasons which gave me a lot to choose from.  Unfortunately, the DVDs were donated and their cases don’t have any listings as to what episodes are on them.

Ugh!

So I just grabbed random discs and figured I would watch until one struck me. But then I ran into problem number three: my blue-ray doesn’t have a remote so I could only watch the very first episode of each disc.

I got lucky on Season 1, Disc 3, episodes 9-12 with The Puppet Show.

So brief recap on what’s happened so far: so Buffy Summers (Sarah Michelle Geller) moves to Sunnydale and fulfills her role as vampire slayer aided by her watcher, Giles, and two best friends-Willow and Xander.

Buffy has a mysterious friend, Angel (David Boreanaz), who is revealed to be a vampire. But unlike other vampires, he was cursed with his soul so he acts more human than bloodsucking evil. The two fall head over heels with each other.

So far they have fought vampires, witches, a giant praying mantis, an animal demon spirit, an ancient demon masquerading as teenage boy online, and the Master’s plans to destroy Buffy.

Wow

With this episode it is time for a talent show and Principal Synder wants to hurt Giles by forcing him to be in charge. When the gang are overheard making fun of the magician who sucks and Cordelia being off key-the three are cast in it, although they have no clue what to do.

One person is doing a ventriloquist act, and what I want to know does anyone know anyone who does that? They always have it in TV, films, and books but has anyone ever had a kid from their school enter a talent show doing a ventriloquist act?

In fact-we only ever see three acts: dummy, Cordelia, and the magician. Weird as there should be more.

So Morgan sucks at his ventrloquist act, until the dummy starts talking back rudely and in a deeper voice. It’s like he has been taken over by a man from the 1940s.

Morgan also looks ill, and the more time he spends with the dummy, the sicker he looks. Headaches, gray skin, etc.

The only good act, the dancer, is stretching when she is attacked by something.

They find her later with her heart carved out.

That is not good,

So they find no tell tale signs tat this is supernatural and intend on leaving it for the cops. However, Buffy feels there is more to this and convinces them to start looking into whether it was something else, some kind of demon.

Hmm…

Meanwhile, the dummy, Sid, is watching Buffy. He tells Morgan she is the one.

We also get to watch the magician be more terrible at magic. There is a girl helping him and she isn’t good at it either.

That night Buffy talks to her mom who encourages her in the talent show letting her know she will be there that night to watch her perform. Buffy begs her not to come, but no dice.

Ugh! Really, mom!

That night, when Buffy is in her bed something attacks her. She fights it off and her mom runs into the room to check on her, they find nothing-but we see Sid in the window peering in.

Yeah, I’m on the train that Sid is the creepy dummy. I mean was there any doubt, After that Twilight Zone episode? And with R.L. Stine picking up the torch?

Buffy is sure she saw Sid, but when she tells the others-they laugh it off.

Bad things happen when you don’t listen

Buffy tries to talk to Morgan, but they get interrupted by Sid and can’t continue to tal. Morgan puts him in his locker and then Buffy breaks in later, Sid is missing. Did he walk away?

Meanwhile Morgan is acting weirder and sicker, and the dummy is talking so much, it gets taken away from him by the teacher.

Xander steals it when Morgan and the teacher are preoccupied and morgan searches for it, frantic.

Not the best idea.

Meanwhile, Xander reveals to Buffy he has the doll and plays around with it. Buffy warns him not to, but Xander laughs her off. Buffy goes to speak to Morgan while Xander sits the dummy down.

Mr. Giles and Willow do some investigating, and find a book on demons possessing toys. One particular demon needs a heart and brain.

Rupert Giles: Every seven years, these demons *need* human organs, a-a brain and a heart, to maintain their humanity. Otherwise, they-they-they revert back to their original form, which is, uh, slightly less appealing.

Willow Rosenberg: [reading] “On rare occasions, inanimate objects of human quality, such as dolls and mannequins, already mystically possessed of consciousness, have acted upon their desire to become human by harvesting organs.”

Uh, oh. They go to Xander, but the dummy is gone!\

Saw that coming,

Buffy goes to find Morgan, but he’s dead, head missing.

What, but I thought he was the guy?

As she investigates further, a candelabra prop crashes down on her. All done by Sid the dummy. She uses her super strength to push it off . The two fight but it turns out that Sid isn’t a demon but a demon hunter.

Sid: This is what I do. I hunt demons. Yeah. You wouldn’t know it to look at me. Let’s just say there was me, there was a really mean demon, there was a curse, and the next thing I know, I’m not me anymore. I’m sitting on some guy’s knee with his hand up my shirt.

Sid chose Morgan to team up as he was very smart and thought someone as beautiful, strong, ad powerful as Buffy must be a demon.

They discuss who the demon could be and decide it has to be someone involved with the talent show. They go to see who is missing during rehearsal but Buffy finds Morgan’s brain!

Why would the demon not want the brain, that’s what he needs???????! They investigate a bit more and are still puzzled as how Morgan was the smartest kid in school?

Giles leaves as he has to go back to the talent show while the kids hack into the school’s computer. They do notice a lot of sick days and Willow goes into his medical records and find out that he had cancer, and it returned.

The demon needs a new brain, but which one is the demon?

Hmmm

I admit I was lost, I thought maybe they shouldn’t trust Sid after all.

They decide that Willow is the next smartest person so as long as she stays away from the talent show. But then they realize there is another really smart person there, Giles.

That is not good,

There the magician needs a new partner and is using Giles as his sister is sick. The magician straps his head in a guillotine-okay this guy is clearly the demon,

As he prepares, a bit of his arm shows which reveals he is the demon.

Giles is about to be killed, when Buffy and crew come in to save the day. She and Sid go after the demon while Willow and Xander free GIles.

When Buffy knocks the demon out. Sid carves the heart out and is released from his curse, free!

Buffy hold him up, deeply disheartened he’s gone; Xander and Willow are by the guillotine with Willow holding the mallet to break the lock on the guillotine; and Xander holding the rope trying to keep Giles from getting his head cut open; and Giles in the guillotine.

And the curtain goes up!

So a great episode. I really love the twist at the end when it turns out that the dummy is’t the bad guy.

To start Horrorfest VIII from the beginning, go to Count Dracula the Propagator of This Unspeakable Evil Has Disappeared. He Must Be Found and Destroyed!: Horror of Dracula (1958)

For more Buffy the Vampire Slayer, go to I’d Risk My Life to Save Yours: Earshot, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1999)

For more demons, go to Night on Bald Mountain: Fantasia (1940)

For more Sarah Michelle Geller, go to A Study in Fandoms

I’d Risk My Life to Save Yours: Earshot, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1999)

Romantic Moment #10

Go here to see which you belong in

Go here to see which you belong in

“Earshot” from Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1999)

So my friend was a huge fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and took me along for the ride. I loved it, especially Angel (David Boreanaz).

Angel

Why did he have to leave the show?

MeanGirls I know right!

Anyways, he makes it so hard to pick just one romantic moment, darn you super romantic guy. But I think I settled on a moment that truly shows how much he cares for Buffy.

hearts banner

So this episode takes place during season three. The Mayor has been revealed as evil:

Mayor from Buffy the vampire slayer

Faith accidentally killed a guy and has gone crazy, siding with the mayor and trying to destroy Buffy (Sarah Michelle Geller).

She is crazy!

She is crazy!

They tried to take away Angel’s soul so that he is evil

Dracula

He joins Faith, dating her now:

1Star-Wars-Luke-NOOO-Not-my-father

But it turns out to be a plot cooked up by Buffy and Angel to get info on the mayor.

However, having Angel going off and be with Faith like that has given Buffy lots of doubts and uncertainty about if Angel really cares about her and what really happened between them.

HeartHurtsDon'tKnowCanDoAgainHeartbroken

She fights a demon, but accidentally gets its blood on her. This gives her the power to read minds.

What?!

But soon this goes bad. The powers grow so strong that she can’t stop hearing voices, her mind hurts so bad, and she overheard that someone is trying to kill everyone in the school.

Not good

Not good

Buffy gets sent home to rest, while her watcher Giles searches for a cure, and the rest of the crew try to find out who is the possible murderer.

hearts banner

Most Romantic Moment: Angel Practically Gets Burned Alive to Save Buffy

So Buffy is going to go completely insane unless she can drink this antidote. The only problem? They need the other demon’s heart, but how can they get it without the Slayer?

Angel buffy the vampire slayer

That’s right, Angel goes out and spends all night and half the day searching for the demon, killing him and bringing back the heart. Now why is that romantic? Well Angel is a Vampire, and has risked his life and suffered in pain; burning in the sunlight. I mean he was literally smoking.

ouch Hermione

And he continues through this to track down the only thing he knows can save Buffy, because he loves her.

igotitbuffythevampireslayerigotthis

And if that’s not enough he then stays by her side watching her until he knows she is okay.

buffythevampireslayerlayinginbedsleepsickwaitingareyouokay

So romantic!

So romantic!

hearts banner

To start Romance is in the Air: Part V, go to I Did It for You: Edward Scissorhands (1990)

For the previous post, go to I Would Go Through Anything for You: Sleeping Beauty (1959)

hearts banner

For more Buffy the Vampire Slayer, go to She’s Been Totally Different…Like Stepford: Ted, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997)

For more Angel, go to Lookin’ Over a Four-Leaf Clover: 17 More Irish Heroes

For more Buffy, go to I’m the Chosen One. And I Choose to be Shopping: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

For more David Boreanaz, go to The Butcher of Burtonsville High: The Death of the Queen Bee, Bones (2010)

For more Sarah Michelle Geller, go to A Study in Fandoms

He Has Risen

heisrisen Easter Jesus

So ends another Easter countdown. May you all have a blessed day!

There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men.”

The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified.  He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay.  Then go quickly and tell his disciples: ‘He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.’ Now I have told you.” –Matthew 28:2-7

The Death of Christ

1500-Pieta Michelangelo

So happy Good Friday everybody. This year we have looked at very different mediums; a photograph, woodcut, and now a sculpture.

This piece is the Pietá by Michelangelo. He did this piece when he was extremely young, in his early twenties, and it shows his genius at sculpture. Even though Michelangelo could paint and sculpt, he never thought of himself as a painter. He always said that he saw the things he wanted to make in the marble, that it was alive and spoke to him; all it wanting was to be freed.

1500-Pieta Michelangelo

This piece is amazing. First of all it is not proportionate and Mary is too young; but Michelangelo wanted to create the essence of the person rather than the actual, realistic self. So let’s talk first about Mary.

We have the youthfulness of when she was told by an angel that she would be the mother of Christ. She is distraught at the death of her son, that she is holding his body in her lap.

Her body os much larger than Jesus’ is as to mimic the way the mother could hold a small child, their baby; which even though Jesus is an adult he is still her baby. Mary’s stance also mimics the way that mother’s would give birth in that time, the birthing stool. So in birth and death she is with her child.

Now let’s look at Jesus:

jesus247e29774-1

In his face we see no life in him, but that he died with a smile on his lips. He has fulfilled the plan of God and the great sacrifice; to save us and have us reign in heaven forever.

Also look at his body and hair, not to mention the folds of his clothes. They just look so real. As if they are two people under a cloth rather than carved out of marble.

Many people didn’t believe that Michelangelo created such an advanced piece of art, so he went back and signed his name in a large script. This is one of the few pieces to bear his signature.

“One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at him: “Aren’t you the Messiah? Save yourself and us!” But the other criminal rebuked him. “Don’t you fear God,” he said, “since you are under the same sentence?  We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.” Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”  Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”–Luke 23: 39-43

“At noon, darkness came over the whole land until three in the afternoon. And at three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”)… Someone ran, filled a sponge with wine vinegar, put it on a staff, and offered it to Jesus to drink.”–Mark 15: 33-36

“When he had received the drink, Jesus said, “It is finished.” With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.”–John 19: 30

“At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook, the rocks split and the tombs broke open…When the centurion and those with him who were guarding Jesus saw the earthquake and all that had happened, they were terrified, and exclaimed, “Surely he was the Son of God!”–Matthew 27:51-54

“So as evening approached, Joseph of Arimathea, a prominent member of the Council, who was himself waiting for the kingdom of God, went boldly to Pilate and asked for Jesus’ body…Joseph bought some linen cloth, took down the body, wrapped it in the linen, and placed it in a tomb cut out of rock. Then he rolled a stone against the entrance of the tomb.”–Mark 15: 42-46

heading-banner11970857801243195263Andy_heading_flourish.svg.hi

For more Good Friday posts, go to The Lamentation of Christ

For the previous painting, go to The Arrest

Angels We Have Heard on High

thebishopwife

If you don’t recognize who the angel is, then you need to read this post!

So Angels We Have Heard on High is one of my favorite Christmas carols. The song was written to commemorate Jesus’ birth, as told in Luke. It was translated in 1852 to English, and has been sung in almost every language by countless artists, my choice being REO Speedwagon.

My favorite part is when they sing “gloria” during the chorus. I just love how clearly the song is written, as every word conjures an image in your mind as you sing.

christmas-flowers-banner

For the previous Christmas carol, go to Inner Beauty

For more on The Bishop’s Wife, go to 25 More Films of Christmas

She’s Been Totally Different…Like Stepford: Ted, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997)

BuffytheVampireSlayerTed

“Will, I’m not wrong here. Ted has a problem with me. He acts like I’m in the way or something. And Mom’s been totally different since he’s around.

Different, like happy?

Like Stepford.”

So quick background for those who don’t know who Buffy Summers is. Buffy is a strong, independent woman that totally kicks butt slaying demons, monsters, vampires, aliens, bug creatures, etc. She is lead by Giles her Watcher or mentor. He’s the type of guy you’d want as a dad or uncle. One if her best friends is Willow (played by Alison Hannigan) a shy, insecure, brilliant girl who takes care of spells and reversing curses. The other is Xander who is a total goofball. There is also Cordelia, the snooty, rich girl. At first she is Buffy’s nemesis, but she actually ends helping the group out. And lastly, Angel. Angel was a guy living in Ireland in the 19th century. He was turned into a vampire and wrecked havoc on the world. He was cursed by a group of witches in getting his soul back, forcing him to have feelings and a conscious. He turns from his life of killing, to protecting; attempting to atone for his mistakes.

That's a lot!

That’s a lot!

So this episode takes place in season 2 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Short recap: Buffy knows she is the “Slayer” and accepted her role. At the end of last season, she saved the whole world from the Hellmouth. She and Angel are dating, and getting closer and closer. More recently, Cordelia and Xander have put aside their mutal disgust as they have become make-out buddies. Giles let loose a demon when he was younger, and that secret/demon came back out in the open. Spike and Druselia have been causing problems, but the crew think they have gotten rid of them. Now onto the review!

DeanSupernaturalLetsGetStarted

So one day Buffy, Xander, and Willow are patrolling the city at night, looking for any Vampires to get rid of. Everything is actually extremely quiet and nice for a change. Maybe it will stay like this for a while?

Spoke too soon

Spoke too soon

So Buffy goes home with her pals, and while she is outside she hears her mother scream and glass break. She pushes the door in, intent to save the day!

I-got-this-reaction-gif

Only to interrupt her mom and a man kissing.

idon'tgotthis

It turns out her mother has been dating a computer salesman, Ted, for quite a while. He came over tonight to cook mini pizzas for Buffy and her. The others of course join them.

Buffy is not happy at all as she does not like her mom dating again. In fact in a lot of ways they reverse roles, as she is scolding her secrecy.

I don't like it 11

Her friends however, love Ted. It turns out he is an amazing cook.

I love Pizza

Now the guy they choose for Ted is John Ritter. You know the sweet, funny guy from Three’s Company? The lovable, over-protective dad from 8 Simple Rules? And in this he is sweet, a great cook, pleasant, kind, etc. But something is just not right.

IDon'tTrustHimGreatGatsby

It’s weird, he’s like the perfect guy ever, but that’s the problem. It’s almost as if he is tooo perfect. Like he’s hiding something.

suspicious Hmm

Maybe I’m reading too much into it.

The next night Ted comes over again and cooks everyone dinner, along with baking cookies.

cookies

That night Buffy is so angry about how everyone is raving over Ted, she goes out patrolling, this time with Giles. Instead of finishing off Vampires like usual, she beats them to a pulp. She clearly has some issues with Ted dating her mom.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

And you can’t really blame her, it was all kind of sprung on her, I mean her mom didn’t even tell her she has started dating again.

How rude

The next day, Willow and Xander can’t stop talking about Ted. It is driving Buffy crazy, and she is convinced that something with Ted just isn’t right.

 buffyvampireslayerTed

Just as Buffy is talking about her suspicions, guess who shows up? Ted.

Person hate talking

Yep, he’s installing some new computer software for the school. He invites Buffy and her friends to mini-golf with him and Joyce, Buffy’s mom. Buffy doesn’t want to go, but her friends do and cancel their nonexistent plans.

On a side note, Giles and the computer teacher, Jenny, were getting close, but because of his old secret coming back to bite him in the butt, she can’t be around him at the moment.

Sadface Batman

That night Buffy goes to Angel’s place. She has been caring for him after he was badly injured in a previous episode. She complains about everything, but sweet Angel tells her to give Ted a chance. After all, her mother’s is probably been lonely from the divorce.

buffyvampireslayerTed

Buffy agrees and heads home.

At dinner that night, Ted is over once again. He not only made dinner, but went to the guidance counselor about her grades. He keeps going “Dad” on Buffy, even though he’s only known her for a couple of days. This makes Buffy angry, not only because he is overstepping his bounds, but being extremely controlling.

Something is not right!

The crew goes mini-golfing and Buffy isn’t very good at it. She knocks her ball way out in the bushes. Everyone wants to let her have a second chance, but Ted. He keeps insisting that rules are rules and they need to followed.

jerk_alert32

Like just chill, it is just a game.

Ted has convinced everyone that Buffy has to follow the rules like everyone else. She then picks up the ball and tosses it in the hole, yelling to everyone that she got a hole in two.

Double double yay

Ted tells her he saw what she did and gets angry. Buffy just shrugs it off and says that it is a game, making Ted get really mad and threaten her.

buffyvampireslayerTed

That’s it, Ted is a creeper.

Certified Creepo Ribbon

He needs to get very, very, far away.

Buffy tries to tell her friends and her mom about it, but no one will listen to her. In fact after Buffy tells her mom what Ted said, Joyce says “No, honey that’s not true. Ted told me what happened.”

Whattheheck

Yes her mom is taking his word over her own daughter!!!

what what'shappeningSupernatural

And that is what makes this episode scarier than any other one in the show. Because this is something that could really happen. Yeah vampires, ghosts, the swim team turning in fishes, a substitute teacher turning out to be some alien insect, etc.; are all pretty creepy. But this one tops them all because it could actually happen. The fact that someone could treat you cruelly but others nicely, causing no one to believe you is the creepiest. Especially when you know they mean you harm.

keanu Whoa

So Buffy knows that she needs to dig up some serious proof is she is going  get everyone to believe her. She goes to Ted’s work and discovers that he has planned his and Joyce’s wedding for two weeks from today!

This can't be happening

This can’t be happening

She looks over at his desk and sees a picture of her mom. When she looks closer, she realizes that she has seen that picture before. She opens the back, and it turns out to be a picture of her and her mom. Ted took it from the fridge where it was hanging, and folded Buffy out of the picture.

buffyvampireslayerTed

da dum Jaws

Yep, it is clear to see that this is a metaphor for what Ted wants to do. Remove Buffy from the picture.

That night Ted comes over for dinner. When he is praying he talks sweet and kind, but all his words are edged in double meaning. He knows what Buffy did.

Spoke too soon

Buffy asks them is they are planning on getting married. They say they aren’t but ask Buffy’s feelings on the matter. She tells them that it makes her want to kill herself.

ouch Hermione

This earns her a ticket to her room. She leaves out the window and goes patrolling. When she gets back she has a surprise waiting for her.

Ted.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not only has he been waiting for her in her room, but he’s been snooping through everything. He found her diary and read it, threatening to tell her mom that she is crazy, and needs psychiatric help for her “Slayer” and “Vampire” delusions; unless she does everything he asks her to do.

Screen shot 2015-06-22 at 6.43.55 AM

Buffy tries to get the diary back and Ted slaps her. The two start fighting, with Buffy’s Slayer abilities causing her to over power him, and him to fall down the stairs. Joyce sees them and checks the body, finding Ted dead.

What! Mark Wahlberg that's weird

You know Joyce is so focused on Ted, she doesn’t even ask why they were fighting. Buffy has been a good kid her whole life, but Joyce just assumes her daughter is a murderer than needs protection, rather than assuming Ted was not as he seemed. Yes, Joyce, bad mother alert.

So they call an ambulance, which takes Ted off to the morgue. Joyce tries to cover everything up, telling the police he fell down the stairs, but Buffy speaks up and tells the truth.

The cops take her downtown and start questioning her.

Being questioned police Annex - Tierney, Gene (Laura)_03

She tells them Ted hit her, and she fought back. The police see no marks on her, [as a Slayer she is fast healer], and are very suspicious but let her go home.

At home things are worse. Her mother won’t talk or look at her. And Buffy has to now deal with the fact that she killed a human, she took a human life. She is not a Slayer or protecter, but a murderer. An accidental one, but still a murder.

Reality Sucks

At school things are not better as everyone stares at her. Willow and Xander try to cheer her up. But nothing seems to help.

Sadface Batman

Buffy goes back home, while Willow, Cordelia, and Xander try to find something on Ted. As they are researching in the library, Xander finds some of Ted’s cookies and eats them. He suddenly becomes completely mellow.

That's weird.

That’s weird.

Willow takes the cookies and runs tests on them, discovering that they were tranquilized. Yep, Ted dosed the cookies so he could control everyone around him.

Then they discover an address for him along with a lot of marriage certificates. Marriage…but no divorce…marriages that go back to the 1950s.

The plot thickens

The plot thickens

Back at Buffy’s house, she is trying to talk to her mom, but Joyce isn’t having anything. Buffy goes up to her room, and finds the window nailed shut. And that’s not all she finds…

buffyvampireslayerted

Ted!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But he was dead!

i'mscared

It turns out that he wasn’t dead, but had to “shut down”. He attacks Buffy and begins strangling her.

OMG

Before he can finish, he hears Joyce and runs downstairs.

Back with the rest of the gang, they find the address, but it looks abandoned. Xander breaks in, and as they are looking, Cordelia notices that the carpet doesn’t match. Moving it aside they find a secret passage that leads to an underground house. As they search inside Xander discovers the best evidence against Ted. His four previous wives’ dead bodies.

OMG

Back at the Summer’s house, Joyce is overwhelmed at seeing Ted alive. He explains that he flatlined, but was brought back. He didn’t come sooner as he “didn’t know who he was.” He tries to talk Joyce into running away with him, but every time he speaks it is all mumbled, almost as if he is short circuiting.

That's weird.

That’s weird.

Ted starts spazing out and Buffy comes down, knocking him out with a frying pan.

tangled_____frying_pan_by_disgrace_angel369-d398z19

Poetic Justice if I do say so myself.

When Buffy does that, we have a major reveal. It turns out that Ted was a cyborg!

buffyvampireslayer2-11p2

They call the police

The next day everything is sorted out and it turns out that the real Ted was dying, back in the 1950s. His wife left him, and he built a robot to be his replacement. The robot went and brought his wife back, imprisoning her until her death. When she died he went searching for “his wife”, choosing another girl who looked just like his first wife, marrying her, and locking her up until she died. This continued up until Joyce.

Oooh creepy!

shiver

It might not be what most would choose as an inaugral episode, but it defintely stuck with me as the creepy factor is super high.

halloween banner

To start Horrorfest IV from the beginning, go to You Cannot Conquer It. It Has Conquered You!: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

For the previous post, go to She Cries in the Night: The Screaming Skull (1958)

halloween banner

For more Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Series), go to Heaven on Earth

For more Buffy Summers, go to I’m the Chosen One…And I Choose to Be Shopping: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

For more on cyborgs/robots, go to I’ll Be Back: The Terminator (1984)