The Enemy of My Enemy is My Friend: Alien Vs. Predator (2004)

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The enemy of my enemy… is my friend

So some of you might be wondering, why am I reviewing Alien Vs. Predator before reviewing Alien (1979), Predator (1987), Aliens (1989), Predator 2 (1990), Alien3 (1992), or Alien: Resurrection (1997).

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Well there are two reasons why: 1) I just saw it last week so it is fresh in my mind; and 2) This was the first movie I saw in either franchise. Although I kind of knew what Alien was about as I had seen Spaceballs.

So Alien Vs. Predator, was an idea that began in back in the ’80s after the films came out. It was then shown in comics, video games, etc. Eventually a script was written, but no studio wanted to make it, so it sat on the back burner for ten years.

It eventually was accepted and is the higest grossing film in either franchise to date. It is absolutely riddled with references to both films, so if you are a fan you will enjoy.

So let’s get started!

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So it is the year 2004, a Predator ship is nearing the Earth, and some scientists detect a mysterious heat bloom beneath the ice on the island Bouvetoya, near Antartica.

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What is it with aliens/monstrous creatures and Antarctica? We have Aliens Vs. Predator, The Thing from Another World, The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, etc. I guess some like the cold, although The Blob didn’t. Sorry, moving on.

Billionaire Charles Bishop Weyland (those who are Alien fans should recognize why I bolded that), decides he wants to claim it for himself. He sends out his top man to recruit the best from all over the world.

Alexa “Lex” Woods is the best field guide for Antarctica. They offer her a large sum to come to a meeeting and hear Weyland’s proposal.

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Sebastian de Rosa, is a struggling archeologist in Mexico. He is just about out of money, and the bank won’t supply anymore; when just like in Jurassic Park Weyland’s man comes with an amazing offer.

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I love this man. He is smart, sexy, Italian, and oh…there’s only one word to describe how I feel. Swoonworthy!

swoon dreamy

Anyways, these two and a collection of paleontologists, linguistic experts, drillers, and mercenaries all gather together. Weyland shows the prospective team the discovery, a pyramid that is a blend of three different cultures. He proposes that they all go try and discover what this phenomenon is.

Alexa ‘Lex’ Woods: Where exactly on the ice is this?

Charles Bishop Weyland: Bouvetøya Island. But it’s not on the ice. It’s 2,000 feet below it.

All will be rewarded handsomely.

AWESOME!!!

AWESOME!!!

Lex is the only one that disagrees, stating that they aren’t ready to make the journey in, they need more time to train the crew. Weyland refuses, saying they need to go now before anyone else moves in.

Lex says she won’t be a part and goes to leave. Weyland agrees to let her go, saying they will go with their number 2 guy.

Good-bye

Good-bye

When Lex hears who it is, she refuses to go. While she doesn’t want to stay and help a group she thinks is doomed for failure, she’d rather go and help them survive.

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So the team moves out. While they are getting there, the Predator ship has entered the Earth’s orbit. They make a shaft from the surface to the pyramid below.

From the film Stargate.

From the film Stargate.

When the team reach the island they discover that on the surface is an old whaling station. A hundred years ago, in 1904, the whole crew disappeared. It is still an unsolved mystery.

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When the team gets ready to drill a cavity to reach the pyramid. The discover one has already been dug for them.

What?

What?

And when the drillers start examining it, they discover that the area was cut with no tools that exist on Earth.

weird

They decide to head down to the pyramid anyways, with a few near mishaps along the way.

When they get inside the pyramid, they start examining the walls and the rooms. They discover that this civilization must be older than anything they have ever known in history. And one of the rooms, appears to be some mind of sacrificial chamber.

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Noooooooooo!!!!! Don’t go in!

However as this is a film and the characters can’t hear me, they of course go in and start looking around. There they find remains with a large hole on the left side of their chest.

Adele Rousseau: What happened here?

Thomas: It’s common in ritual sacrifice to take the heart of the victim.

Adele Rousseau: That’s nice. But that’s not where your heart is. [pauseBesides it looks like the bones were bent straight out. [Thomas stares at RousseauSomething broke out of this body.

Now this bothered me the first time I saw it, and it bothers me still. THE ALIENS SHOULD NOT BE COMING OUT OF THE CHEST!!!! THEY SHOUD BE COMING OUT OF THE STOMACH!!!!

MeanGirls I know right!

They screwed up one of the best scenes. It is way creepier seeing this:

Anyways, back to the film.

So unbeknownst to them, on the surface, the three predators have takes out the rest of the team. Below them, their presence has begun the preparations for “the game” and awakened the Queen Alien Queen. It is a creepy scene. I couldn’t find a video, but trust me, it is super creepy!

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So back in the sacrificial room, Sebastian has discovered what appears to be a sarcophagus with a calendar lock, set for October 10, 1904.

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He studies it and notices that ten, and multiples of it, seem to be significant to this culture, whatever this culture is. He then moves the date to October 10, 2004; the current date.

Stop stop it now!

Don’t you know better than to touch/mess with things. Like in The Mummy (1999), you never know what might happen.

Some things should just be left alone. But no, these are scientists and they never know when to back off, setting off the spring lock and revealing guns.

Whattheheck

What is an ancient civilization doing with such advanced weapons we don’t even have today? How did they get them? Where did they get them? It just doesn’t make sense.

[the team finds the Predators’ shoulder cannons]

Graeme Miller: Any idea what these are?

Sebastian de Rosa: No, you?

Graeme Miller: No.

Maxwell Stafford: It’s a good thing we brought the experts.

Graeme Miller: Well, yeah, it is a good thing, cos’ this is like finding Moses’ DVD collection.

And then as Lex convinces them it is time to move topside and regroup, they stupidly take the guns, beginning the “game.” Now part of the game is that every so often the pryamid shifts, making one difficult playing ground for either team.

If that was me? I’d start shooting everywhere, killing as much as possible.

For reals, they would all be dead.

For reals, they would all be dead.

So the teams are separated and all are trying to find an exit, but soon they will realize that will be near impossible.

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As Lex’s party makes their way to the exit, they are attacked by the Predators, of which have to switch gears when the aliens start showing themselves.

Yeah two Predators end up getting killed. Too bad they didn’t have their guns.

Soon everyone is being killed or taken to be impregnated by the aliens until they are properly formed. This actually reminds me a lot of the tarantula wasp, who lays its eggs in the spider. When the eggs hatch they eat the spider, then creating a cocoon in the spider body, coming out when it is fully matured. After all that’s what happens here, except no eating. The alien baby goes into the human, emerging only when fully pupated.

ew! Gross Yuck

The only ones left are Weyland (who is slowing them down as he is on his deathbed with his bad heart), Lex, and sexy Sebastian. Lex wants to lighten Weyland’s load, discarding the gun he took from the sacrificial chamber. When he refuses, wanting something from the death and destruction, she switches the heavy weapon to her pack instead. They are then interrupted by Sebastian, who has figured out that the pyramid also goes off the decimal system, and that every ten minutes the pyramid shifts.

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Weyland asks to be left behind, to buy them some time from the predator hunting them. Lex and Sebastian don’t like it, but agree and head off to another area trying to escape. Weyland is killed when he attacks the remaining Predator, but Sebastian and Lex make it out. Oh, this scene always stresses me out.

So luckily, they ended up in the room full of the hieroglyphics that tell us the backstory of why these extraterrestrials have come to our planet.

Yes, the whole thing was a trap. They made that heat signal to attract somebody, as this was the only way to begin the hunt as they need the humans for hosts.

After hearing the story, Lex figures out what they must do to survive, is to give the weapon back to the Predator.

Sebastian de Rosa: When that door opens, we’re dead.

Alexa ‘Lex’ Woods: Not if we set things right.

Sebastian de Rosa: What do you mean?

Alexa ‘Lex’ Woods: This pyramid, it’s like a prison. We took the guards’ guns, and now the prisoners are running free. To restore order, the guards need their guns.

Sebastian de Rosa: During a big game hunt, the animals being hunted don’t arm the hunters!

Alexa ‘Lex’ Woods: They’re not hunting us. We’re in the middle of a war. It’s time to pick a side.

Sebastian de Rosa: We are on our side!

Alexa ‘Lex’ Woods: We have to consider the possibility that we might not make it out of here.

Sebastian de Rosa: The enemy of my enemy… is my friend.

Alexa ‘Lex’ Woods: [pyramid starts to reconfigure] Let’s go find our friend.

So after the pyramid opens, the two go looking for a Predator, but run into an alien. They run away, but reach a collapsed bridge. Taking an Indiana Jones  leap of faith, they jump across the chasm. Sebastian lands rights, while Lex on loose stones and starts falling.

Spoke too soon

Sebastian helps pull her up, until he is taken by an alien.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

WHY!!! WHY!!! WHY SEBASTIAN?????????

Why

He was an awesome character. He was intelligent, funny, kind, has common sense, and hot. Poor Sebastian. RIP handsome.

AVPSebastian_De_Rosasmilehappy

Back to the review.  So Lex is running away, and runs right into the Predator. He is about to kill her, when she stops him and gives him back the weapon. Before the Predator can do anything else, and alien attacks them.

Having proven her worth, Lex and the Predator head out to finish up.

Alien-vs-Predator_Sana

The two head back to the sacrificial chamber, which we should really call the birthing room. There Lex finds all her team members, including Sebastian, all of which have been impregnated.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

NOT SEBASTIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So the Predator scans the room, and sees that the eggs are all going to try and hatch. He activates his bomb, to destroy everything. Then he and Lex run to the lift, planning to get out of there and to the surface, as quickly as possible. They are followed by the Queen, but make it up the surface. The whole pyramid goes Kablooey!

Jaws Backstage Universal tour

But it turns out that the Queen wasn’t destroyed in the blast! She comes topside and knocks the Predator out, chasing after Lex to destroy her too.

You know for a huge environmentalist, Lex just threw a whole bunch of trash into the ocean. She could seriously damage the ecosystem. And I don’t know if that was the best idea as we don’t if the aliens are unable to survive underwater. Maybe they can. I couldn’t find any info on that. Anyways…

So after all the fighting is completed, the Predator ship returns to pick up its champions. They take their fallen warrior inside and are about to kill Lex, when the see the sign the Predator carved into her face. She is a warrior, equal to them.

They leave and in the ship, the crew get a surprise.

Now this was a part I didn’t like either. All the other people when impregnated, had the alien jump out rather quickly. I mean Sebastian got his after the Predator was supposedly infected, and his came out way before. And I looked it up, so don’t say it is because they were in a different species, its supposed to happen for everyone two hours after impregnation. This was just a cheap twist in order to ensure a sequel. And I hate it when filmmakers do that.

I don't like it 11

But on the whole I loved this movie. The story was a great homage to both films, with its own flavor and not giving the vibe of being a remake. The characters were great, and pretty intelligent, making only one big mistake (removing the weapons). The main character, Lex, was a strong character like Ripley: powerful, and in control; but a realistic way, being scared and frightened but using that fear to fight. Great movie.

As for the sequel? We’ll just have to save that for another post.

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To start Horrorfest IV from the beginning, go to You Cannot Conquer It. It Has Conquered You!: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

For the previous post, go to Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up?: The Twilight Zone (1961)

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For more aliens, go to It’s Mrs. Archer. She’s On a Rampage!: Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958)

For more expeditions gone wrong, go to Eternal Punishment for Anyone Who Opens This Casket: The Mummy (1932)

 

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Eternal Punishment for Anyone Who Opens This Casket: The Mummy (1932)

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“Eternal punishment… for… anyone… who… opens… this… casket. In the name… of Amon-Ra… the king of the gods.”

I LOVE this film!!!! It is a classic horror/B film that stars the amazing, wonderful, absolutely fabulous Boris Karloff! That man was a genius and can do creepy so well. Just check out FrankensteinAnyway The Mummy is a member of Universal’s Classic Horror collection; a collection that also houses The Phantom of the Opera, Frankenstein,  The Bride of FrankensteinDracula, The Creature from the Black Lagoon, The Wolf Man, etc.

I love this movie so much that last year I made my own poster for my cover page on facebook. Here it is, hope you like it.

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So The Mummy has become such a huge part of our culture. It has been in so many other films and TV series; such as Scooby-Doo and the Ghoul SchoolScooby-Doo and the Reluctant WerewolfGet Smart: The MummyLaverne & Shirley: The Mummy’s BrideTransylvania 6-5000DuckTales: Ducky Horror Picture ShowSupernatural: Monster Movie, Frankenweenie, etc

It also has had countless remakes such as The Mummy’s Hand (1940), The Mummy’s Tomb (1942), The Mummy’s Ghost(1944),  The Mummy’s Curse (1944),  Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy, The Mummy (1959), The Curse of the Mummy’s Tomb (1964), The Mummy’s Shroud (1966),  Blood from the Mummy’s Tomb (1971), The Mummy’s Revenge (1973), The Mummy Lives (1993),  The Mummy (1999), The Mummy Returns (2001)The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008), and the animated series The Mummy

What’s funny is that The Mummy started out as something completely different. It was originally going to be called “Cagliostro“, based on a “prophet”/charlatan who claimed that he had lived for several centuries. It was changed with the discovery of King Tut‘s tomb and the controversy over “his curse”.  It is the only one of the Universal Classic Horror Collection that is not based off of legend, myth, or classical fiction; but was created all on its own. Interestingly enough, this film is very similar to Dracula, as the writers and directors who worked on that worked on this as well.

Previous to Frankenstein Karloff was unknown, but by this time Karloff was such a huge name that all they had to do was advertise “KARLOFF is THE MUMMY!”

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So the film begins with Sir Joseph Wemple leading an archeological expedition in Egypt. He and his crew strike it rich finding a mummy and all his belongings.

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However, this mummy, has a curse placed upon him.

“Sir Joseph Whemple: [translating inscription on box] “Death… eternal punishment… for… anyone… who… opens… this… casket. In the name… of Amon-Ra… the king of the gods.” Good heavens, what a terrible curse!”

Not only that but

“Doctor Muller: Look – the sacred spells which protect the soul in its journey to the underworld have been chipped off the coffin. So Imhotep was sentenced to death not only in this world, but in the next.”

Sir Joseph’s best friend, Doctor Muller, warns him to stay away from the mummy, that only bad things will come of it, but Sir Joseph can’t, he just has to continue to examine the body all in the name of science. Doctor Muller is very much a Van Helsing type character, expressed more so as the film continues.

Sir Joseph manages to find the scroll of Thoth that brings the dead back to life, and his assistant, Ralph Norton, can’t help but read it.

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He reads it in front of the Mummy and brings him to life!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Isn’t Karloff gruesome? What a great costume!

I can’t really blame Norton, as I would do the same thing if I could see Boris Karloff. 😀

This is so me.

This is so me.

We are then fast-forwarded ten years to the present, 1932. Sir Joseph’s son is also an archeologist, but unfortunately his digging crew has come up with nothing so far. Frank Whemple, Sir Joseph’s son, is the only Whemple left in Egypt, as after his father discovered his crazed assistant, Sir Joseph packed up and returned to England, determined to never come to Egypt again. Frank is about to follow his father when he is approached by a modern Egyptian Aderth Bay [they used this name for the leader of the Maji in The Mummy (1999)]. 

Look familiar?

Look familiar?

Yep Ardeth Bay is really the Mummy. He gives Frank a map to finding a site “greater than Tutankhamun’s”, his reasons for sharing being that Egyptians are not allowed to dig up their own land but can only do it through foriegners.

Karloff’s makeup was based on the appearance of Ramses III; and had to go through eight hours of makeup application. Karloff speaks in a stilted voice that only adds to his mummy persona, but this was due to the fact that so many layers of cotton were glued to his face to create the wrinkled skin that Karloff was unable to move his facial muscles enough even to speak.

Even though I am referring him to as the Mummy, his real name is Imhotep. Imhotep is the high priest and they named him after the orginal high priest who designed the stepped pryamid of Djoser in 2630–2611 BCE, the first pryamid ever created in ancient times. That Imhotep wasn’t sentenced cruely but actually so honored he was declared a god.

Anyways, back to the film. They dig and find the remains of Ankh-es-en-Amon, the princess.

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Later Frank attends a ball in which he spots the beautiful Helen Grosvenor, played by Zita Johann.

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Helen is biracial, her mother was Egyptian while her father was British (the Evie character in the 1999 version). Her father is in charge of the Sudan, but Helen didn’t want to go and is staying with Dr. Muller. She is very nostalgic and easily lost in  the mystery and mysticism of ancient Egypt.

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Imhotep prepare a ceremony t0 help him discover who his beloved Ankh-es-en-Amon’s reincarnated body is. You see back in the day, Imhotep was mummified after trying to resurrect his forbidden lover, the princess Ankh-es-en-Amon. Ever since he was revived he has been trying to find ways to bring her back. But first he needs her reincarnated form as they are “linked” to put Ankh-es-en-Amon’s full spirit in.

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This reincarnated body is Helen Grosvenor who looks just like Ankh-es-en-Amon.

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Imhotep calls to her, and she answers. In a zombie like trance she gets a cab and goes to the museum. She tries to get in, but it is locked for the night. Frank finds her and tries to figure out how to help her when she faints. Frank picks her up and takes her to Dr. Muller’s.

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Helen wakes up and her and Frank form an Insta-connection. While they are busy oogling each other, Sir Joseph and Dr. Muller are trying to figure out how Ardeth Bay, Imhotep, and Helen are all connected. They also hear of a murder at the museum (Ardeth Bay killed a guard who discovered him) and find the remains of his ceremony.

Hmm...

Hmm…

Sir Joseph and Dr. Muller return and have connected all the dots. They try to bring Frank up to speed but he just thinks they are talking crazy.  Imhotep shows up as he knows that they hold his scroll needed for the ritual. When he arrives he finds Helen. He tries to remind her “who she is”, but she doesn’t remember. She does however have a bond with him, one she cannot explain. Dr. Muller tries to get her out of there, but she doesn’t want to go. However, Frank is able to convince her.

They too hold a bond

They too hold a bond

Dr. Muller, Sir Joseph, and Imhotep all have a confrontation, everyone letting each other know that they know who each is. They tell Imhotep that they are going to burn the scroll of Thoth that brings people back from the dead. Imhotep warns them to return the scroll to him or die.

Gilmore girls creep

That night Imhotep uses his magical pool to see Sir Joseph trying to burn the scroll.

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He doesn’t like that one bit and sends Sir Joe a heart attack. He then commands the servant, as he has the power to command all those with Egyptian blood, to burn some other paper and bring him the scroll.

The next day Dr. Miller gives Frank an Isis charm that will protect him. But he warns him not to give the charm to ANYONE ELSE IT WON’T WORK FOR ANYONE ELSE!

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That day Imhotep calls to Helen and she goes to him. He shows her the past in his wishing pool.

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He was punished for messing with fate that wasn’t his to mess with.

When Helen goes home, Frank is there waiting having been extremely worried about her. Helen goes through a range of emotions as her two sides are fighting with each other. Dr. Muller puts her under house arrest/house care. She acts very much like Mina after Dracula has bit her.

They keep looking for Imhotep but can’t find him. They ask Helen to answer the next time he calls so they can find him and kill him.

Frank waits outside Helen’s door and decides to help her by placing his Isis charm around the doorknob to keep Imhotep out.

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DID YOU NOT HEAR THE MAN EARLIER?

princess Bride Victim to classic blunder Vizzini

HE SAID IT WILL WORK ONLY FOR YOU! YOU KEEP IT! I mean this is such a classic mistake made by these men in these horror films. In Dracula, he just has to give the girl the cross charm that is supposed to protect only him, and then gets knocked out and is unable to keep her from being kidnapped. In The Wolf Man, he gives the girl the charm to protect him, and it doesn’t work for her. Instead he manifests into being a werewolf and almost kills her. MORAL OF THESE STORIES, KEEP THE DANG CHARM!!! DON’T GIVE IT AWAY!!!

Imhotep knocks out Frank and kidnaps Helen, taking her away to the museum to complete the ritual.

Boris Karloff and Zita Johann in 'The Mummy'

However, Ankh-es-en-Amon doesn’t want to die and be transformed, she likes being alive. She also knows that she is someone else and wants to live that life as well.

Just as Frank and Dr. Miller storm in, Ankh-es-en-Amon calls upon Isis for help and protection.

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Isis comes to life and turns Imhotep into a pile of dust. Frank calls Helen back from the spirit world and the two live happily ever after.

I guess that's all

Click here to watch the full movie.

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So I took this quiz to see what classic monster I am. I totally thought I would get The Phantom of the Opera, but instead I got the Mummy.

Go here to see who you are.

Go here to see who you are.

I have to say that some of that I agree with. The classic things are spot on as I’m sure any of you who have read my posts have realized that.

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To start Horrorfest II from the beginning, go to There Are Many Strange Legends in the Amazon: The Creature From The Black Lagoon (1954)

For the previous post, go to Say Something Human: Warm Bodies (2013)

 halloween bannerFor more Boris Karloff, go to It’s Alive, it’s ALIVE!: Frankenstein (1931)

For more Classic Horror Films, go to Feast Your Eyes On My Accursed Ugliness: The Phantom of the Opera (1925)

For more mummies, go to Grimwood Ghouls’ Gym Teacher: Scooby-Doo and the Ghoul School (1988)