All I Know About Trilogies is That in the Third One, All Bets are Off: Scream 3 (2000)

Scream3_ver2

What do you know about trilogies? You mean like movie trilogies…Well, all I know about trilogies is that in the third one, all bets are off.

So welcome to another Scream-tastic Saturday! (For the previous Saturdays, go to Scream and Scream 2)

Scream-Casey-Becker-drew-barrymore-31896958-2560-1088

Yep the third installment in this now trilogy, Scream 3.

While this was a great horror parody, it wasn’t my favorite of the three. I thought it was okay, as it had Patrick Dempsey, but didn’t like how it was missing one of the best characters: Randy.

Randy

So this one is a complete throw out of left field, as it is the third film. This time we have the secret backstory that changes all that was ever given to us in the first two.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

In fact Wes Craven actually filmed three different endings and didn’t tell the cast which one he was going to use. It was one big surprise.

Scream 3 takes place three years after Scream 2. If you recall from Scream 2, Cotton Weary is exonerated and Sidney agreed to do that interview with him. Well, that really helped as now Cotton hosts his own nationally syndicated talk show, called 100% Cotton.

hold-up-wait-a-minute-let-me-put-some-pimpin-in-it

That’s really the name they went with? I know its catchy, but it sounds more like an underwear commercial than a real show.

felix_the_cat_laughing

Anyways, back to the plot. He gets a phone call that starts out benign, but then quickly turns deadly.

Look at that smile!

Cotton Weary: Who’s this?

Female Caller: Who’s this?

Cotton Weary: Who are you calling?

Female Caller: Oh, you know what, I’ve got the wrong number.

Cotton Weary: That’s okay.

Female Caller: Wait, your voice. You sound a lot like that guy on TV, uh, Cotton Weary.

Cotton Weary: I do huh?

Female Caller: Yeah, I think he’s got a really sexy voice.

Cotton Weary: [laughs] Okay, well, thank you.

Female Caller: Wait a minute. You are Cotton, aren’t you? Oh my God, I am talking to Cotton Weary.

Cotton Weary: [laugh] You caught me. Listen can you hold on for a minute? I got someone on the other line.

Female Caller: Yeah…

Cotton Weary: Hold on.

Cotton Weary: [switches to car phone] Andrea, I got someone on the other line. I’ll have to call you back [switches back to cell phone] So… you a 100% Cotton fan?

Female Caller: Yeah, 110%.

Cotton Weary: [chuckle] That’s very good. So, uh… Why don’t you tell me your name?

Female Caller: Ooh, you’re a naughty boy, Cotton. Now, what would your girlfriend think?

Cotton Weary: What makes you think I have a girlfriend?

Phone Voice: [click] I know you do. I’m right outside her bathroom door. She’s in the shower. She’s got a nice little… voice. Let’s go in for a closer look. Ooh, she’s very, very pretty, Cotton. A step up from Maureen Prescott. Speaking of which, let’s play a game. Answer right, your girlfriend lives, answer wrong she dies. Where’s Maureen’s daughter, Sidney?

Cotton Weary: Who the f*** is this?

Phone Voice: Someone who would kill to know where Sidney Prescott is. You’ve got connections. One chance, Cotton. Where is she?

Cotton Weary: Listen to me, you son of a b****, if you touch Christine, I’ll f****** kill you.

Phone Voice: Wrong answer! [click; dead line]

LOL Cotton and Cotton

LOL Cotton and Cotton 100% Cotton

Cotton rushes home to try and reach his girlfriend.

Now Christine the girlfriend is pretty stupid. She doesn’t lock her bathroom when she takes a shower? Who does that? Everyone does!

Ren Stevens: What? Honey, you're chased by six mutants, and you just decided to take a shower?

Ren Stevens: What? Honey, you’re chased by six mutants, and you just decided to take a shower?

Pretty much she gets killed, Psycho-style.

Psycho-Shower

Making her

Victim #1

Victim #1

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Cotton is soon to follow.

Victim #2

Victim #2

Now that begs the question, where is Sidney? What happened to her?

Suspense have to know

So Sidney had a major breakdown and faced a lot of changes since the last film. Let’s review. She had a killer target her again. She thought it might be her boyfriend. She watched her best friend die. She watched her boyfriend die. Someone who she thought was her friend, turned out to be a “sleeper agent” and tried to murder her. She almost died.

ouch Hermione

Yeah…that’s a lot to deal with a lot.

I don't know what to do

In fact, so much to deal with that Sidney has moved very, very far away to a secluded spot and only a handful have an idea of where she is. What she does for a living is work with a suicide prevention hotline. She gets one call a day. Today’s call isn’t the usual…its THE caller.

When-a-Stranger-Calls-s01

When a Stranger Calls

She hears about what happened to Cotton and realizes, it’s happening again.

scream 2 start again

Currently in Hollywood they are creating another Stab film, Stab 3, based on the true events of Scream 2. Cotton was one of the producers, so the cops have been checking it out. One cop is Mark Kincaid, played by Patrick Dempsey. In fact just like Mark Wahlberg in The Lovely Bones, Dempsey was hired the night before and had to figure the character out without any real ideas of the script. Anyways, Kincaid has been using Gale Weathers for background info as they found a photo of Sidney’s mother Maureen at the crime scene. Gale journeys out to Hollywood and when she gets there she discovers Dewey is there. Yep, the two broke up as Dewey didn’t like how she treats people. He is working as a consultant for the film, and dating the actress playing Gale Weathers that looks just like her, Jennifer Jolie.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

 Meanwhile on the set of Stab 3, one of the blond bimbos enters an office looking for someone and gets murdered.

Victim #3

Victim #3

Yep, this killer wastes very little time as later at Jennifer Jolie’s house her bodyguard gets a phone call and is murdered by ghostface.

Victim #4

Victim #4

The bodies are just dropping like flies. I wasn’t going to post this, but I feel like I can’t go any farther as this song is running through my brain nonstop.

To add to the intensity of this particular Ghostface is that he then blows up Jennifer Jolie’s house

OMG

The killer tries to attack Gale, but Dewey saves her by shooting at him.

Meanwhile, Sidney’s back. The attacks and calls encouraged her to come back and help find the killer. She and Mark clash at first a bit.

Sidney: What do you know about trilogies?

Mark: You mean like movie trilogies?

Sidney: You seem to like movies, Detective.

Mark: Call me “Mark”, will you? ‘Cause I’m gonna keep calling you Sidney.

Sidney: I’ll call you “Mark” when you catch the killer, Detective.

Mark: Well, all I know about trilogies is that in the third one, all bets are off.

Sidney: Did you request this case?

Mark: No. They tend to put me on the ones that deal with the business. I grew up here and I know my way around the studios.

Sidney: Must be exciting. Beautiful place, beautiful people.

Mark: To me, Hollywood is about death.

Sidney: Excuse me?

Mark: I’m a homicide cop. When you see what I see day in and day out, the violence that people do to each other, you get haunted. I think you know about that.

Sidney: What do you mean?

Mark: I know what it’s like to see ghosts that don’t go away, to be watching a scary movie in your head, whether you want to or not, watching it alone.

Sidney: Ghosts are tough. You can’t shoot ghosts.

Mark: Can’t arrest ghosts. But the trick to keep from getting haunted is to be with people. You’re here, you’re not in hiding. You’ve done the right thing… Miss Prescott. What did you know about your Mother?

Sidney: I always thought I had the perfect Mom, the perfect family until I found out I was wrong. She had a secret life and I tried to understand that. And… soon as I thought… then I had more secrets. I don’t know who my Mom was.

Mark: You knew who she was to you. Here’s the deal: I’m off to search the set. I think that what you saw is real. That’s the good news.

Sidney: How’s that good news?

Mark: Because it means that we are dealing with a flesh and blood killer, and I know how to handle guys like that.

Sidney: Oh, yeah. How?

Mark: Catch him or kill him.

Sidney: Hey, Detective? What’s your favorite scary movie?

Mark: My life.

Sidney: Mine, too.”

And that brings up a very interesting concept. What are the rules for a trilogy? How should we do this? Last time we had Randy to lead us, but now what are we going to do? Poor Randy! Best character ever! Oh, Randy! Randy nooooooooo!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

So what Craven decided to do is to bring Randy into the film via video recording.

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

That’s how you gonna do it? That’s it? That’s really it?

Darcy P&P OMG Can't Even

 

The original idea was to have Randy survive the stabbing in Scream 2, his family having rescued him secretly. This was ultimately deemed to be too far-fetched so Randy was resurrected via a post-mortem video appearance instead. They knew they had to bring him back as the fans loved him. In fact Wes Craven got a ton of hate mail for killing off Randy, and thought this would appease the fans. Yeah you dunderheads, you made a big mistake.

big mistake

Well you know what would have been an even better idea? NOT KILLING HIM!!!!!!!!

Mhm great gatsby

So here we go. Rules for a trilogy.

So Gale is eager to do some investigative reporting and finds herself being followed by Jennifer Jolie. Jolie wants to really “get into” her role. Great for Jolie, bad for Gale.

Ugh

Ugh

I’m sure she would rather be punched in the face by Sidney.

Scream-Punch

So they go down to the archives and we have the funniest scene in the whole film.

Sidney also gets attacked by the killer.

Scream

She gets away and goes down to police headquarters to make a statement. At this point in time Sidney discovers that Mark Kincaid has a lot of newspaper clips and info on her. It creeps her out and makes her wonder whether or not he is the killer.

Scream 2 Doubts

But it turns out her story and survival had intrigued him and he fell for her. Just like Det. Lt. Mark McPherson in Laura (1944). Which causes this earlier statement to make a lot more sense.

“Mark: I’m gonna talk to the studio guys about those photos.

Detective Wallace: Yeah right, I know where you’re going.

Mark: Yeah keep an eye on Sidney.

Detective Wallace: I know where you’re going, you’re gonna get her some flowers and candy, right? Huh?

Mark: Gimme a break!”

You're_in_love_with_her

The main producer of the film, John Milton, invites everyone over for a cast party at his house. Unfortunately, they have been dragged to that house for one reason alone, the killer is going to kill them all!

dun-dun-duuuun

Time to prepare yourself.

Sidney in the parlor with a candlestick

Sidney in the parlor with a candlestick

Now this is where the bodies really start hitting the floor.

Dewey and Gale discover the film’s director, Roman, stuffed in a chest.

Victim #5

Victim #5

Angeline, an actress, runs off and is murdered.

Victim #6

Victim #6

Then Tyson (another actor)

Victim #7

Victim #7

And Jennifer

Victim #8

Victim #8

The killer then attacks Gale and Dewey, knocking them out and tying them up. In a surprising twist, Ghostface doesn’t murder them but uses them to bait Sidney to the house.

Sidney shoots him, but he ends up escaping. Kincaid comes in to save the day, but gets knocked out by the killer. The killer then chases Sidney and reveals himself to be Roman.

Say What

Yep he had faked his own death. Now you may be wondering why would a famous film director want to murder Sidney Prescott? Well it turns out that he is Maureen’s illegitimate son.

dun-dun-duuuun

This is actually radically different than any of the other Scream films. All the others have two killers; Scream-Billy & Stu, Scream 2-Mrs. Loomis & Mickey, Scream 4 had two but I won’t reveal until next week. Now the reason that this film had only one was that it was supposed to be the last film. That is until Wes got greedy and made the atrocity Scream 4 which I will review next week.

So know not only do we have the villain monologue, but the big reveal.

Phone Voice: You’re not going anywhere Sidney. It’s time you came to terms with me, and with mother. Maybe you never knew her at all Sidney… maybe you just can’t get past the surface of things.

Sidney: Who the hell are you?

Phone Voice: The other half of you. I searched for a mother too, an actress named “Reena Reynolds” tried to find her my whole LIFE, and four years ago I actually tracked her down. Knocked at her door thinking she’d welcome me with open arms, but she had a new life and a new name, Maureen Prescott! You were the only child she claimed Sidney. She shut me out into the cold forever! Her own son [takes off mask to reveal he is Roman Bridger] Roman Bridger, director, and brother. She slammed the door in my face, Sid. She said I was “Reena’s” child and Reena was dead… and then it struck me. What a good idea, so I watched her. I made a little movie, a little family film. Seems Maureen…”Mom”… she really got around. I mean Cotton was one thing; everybody knew about that. But Billy’s father – that was the key. Your boyfriend didn’t like seeing his daddy in my film too much. He didn’t like it at all. And once I supplied the motivation… all the kid needed was a few pointers. Have a partner to sell out incase you got caught, find someone to frame, it was like he was making a movie.

Sidney: You… this is all because of you.

Roman: I’m a director Sid, I direct.

Sidney: Ah.

Roman: I had no idea, that they were gonna make a film of their own. I mean intoducing Sidney the victim, Sidney the survivor, SIDNEY THE STAR!

He also reveals that John the producer raped Maureen, and Roman was their child. He kills John for revenge, bringing the body count to

Victim #8

Victim #8

Sidney is just tired of this.

boohoo_zps058c9fe1

Tired of hearing another killer blaming the circumstances of their life on her. Sidney berates Roman who gets angered enough to attack her leading to a fight. Roman manages to gain the upper hand but a distraction by Kincaid allows Sidney to grab his knife. He takes Kincaid’s gun and shoots her.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

However, it turns out that she is wearing a bulletproof vest. She uses the knife and stabs him several times in the back and heart. Dewey takes his gun and shoots him several times, making sure he gets in a headshot.

Gale-Randy-Billy-and-Sidney-scream-23148646-499-198

The four-Gale, Dewey, Kincaid, and Sidney head out to her secluded mountain home. There Dewey proposes to Gale, by carving out her book and placing the ring inside. Now I know this is “romantic”, but to me it sounds horrible. You just destroyed a book!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Sidney also starts a relationship with Kincaid, and it ends on a happy note. At last it is all over.

hereIgoagainWhitesnake

That is until this horrible thing comes up:

Scream-4-Intl-3

Well that was Scream 3. Tune in next week for the final chapter.

2000Scream-3

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to Tuesday the 17th

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For more on the Scream Franchise, check out It’s Happening Again, Isn’t It?

For more trilogies, go to Life Finds a Way

For more on serial killers, go to You Think You Know Something, Don’t You?

For more horror parodies, go to A Deliciously Creepy Tale

For more on slasher films, go to Hello? Is There a Killer in My Kitchen?

For more on Patrick Dempsey, go to I Don’t Dance or Sing, Except When I’m With You

For more on Wes Craven, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?

For more on Whitesnake, go to Here I Go Again

For more of my fav songs, go to Rock You Like a Hurricane 

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It’s Happening Again, Isn’t It?: Scream 2 (1997)

scream-2

It’s happening again, isn’t it?

So welcome to another Screamin’ Saturday. Yep, every Saturday this month we are going to cover the Scream franchise. Go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie? to read about the first one.

**** Contains Spoliers ****

Now the first Scream film was a parody of horror films. Scream 2 is similar, but takes it one step further by making this a parody of horror sequels, and sequels in general. Kevin Williamson actually came up with the ideas for Scream 2 while writing the script for Scream. Scream 2 began principal photography just six months after the release of Scream, and it was released less than a year after its predecessor.

keanu Whoa

So Scream takes place two years since the last film, and Gale Weathers has not only written her book about the Woodsboro murders, but her book has been turned into a film, Stab. They are having a midnight showing for the film in which all those who attend receive a free ghostface mask + costume.

So we open with a boyfriend and girlfriend going to see the film. She’s not really into it, but her boyfriend is all over the slasher flick. The two start watching the film, when her boyfriend goes off to the bathroom. Just like in Friday the 13th, he meets his end.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Making it body #1

Victim #1

Victim #1

Back at the theater, his date is chilling, watching the film, when she too meets her end.

Victim #2

Victim #2

Everyone hears her screams, but does nothing as they think it was just a publicity stunt.

The next day we go to Windsor College, where the dead boy and girl attended school; and also the place that Randy and Sidney go to. Randy is in his film class where they are discussing whether or not violent films really encourages people to become killers. The reason this plays such a crucial role in the film, was because after the first film came out there were a ton of people trying to copy the murders and they way they killed people in the film. In fact many tried to blame it on scary movies and try to get directors like Wes Craven to be held responsible for it.

“Film Teacher: You could say that what happened in that theatre was a direct result of the movie itself.

Cici: That is so Moral Majority. You can’t blame real life violence on entertainment.

Film Class Guy #1: Yes you can. Don’t you ever watch the news?

Film Class Guy #2: Hello? The murderer was wearing a ghost mask just like in the movie. It’s directly responsible.

Cici: No, it’s not. Movies are not responsible for our actions.

Mickey: Its a classic case of life, imitating art, imitating life.

Film Class Mopey Girl: Its not hypothetical, it’s not about art. I had biology with that girl. This is reality.

Randy: Thank you. I agree with you. Let me tell you about reality, Mickey. I lived through this, okay? Life is life. It doesn’t imitate anything.

Mickey: Oh come on Randy, with all due respect, the killer obviously patterned himself after two serial killers who were immortalized on film.

Film Class Guy #2: Thank you!

Film Teacher: So, you’re suggesting that someone is trying to make a real life sequel?

Randy: Stab 2? Who would wanna do that? Sequels suck! Oh please, please! By definition alone, sequels are inferior films!

Thank you Randy!

Bad Sequels psycho-1960-alfred-hitchcock-janet-leigh-pic-21

And this spurns a debate on whether or not sequels are horrible films. I have to say that I usually hate sequels, but there are some that are better than the original, such as Aliens, or just as good, like Terminator 2.  Anyways, as they are debating, one student, Mickey, says that Godfather II is so much better than the original. Mickey you are stupid. Godfather II is no where near as awesome as the original GodfatherThe Godfather was an amazing film about this family and one man’s struggle to get free, but getting trapped in something he does not want. It is AWESOME! The second one isn’t bad, but the plot is a little scattered with the juxtaposition between Vito’s start in America, and Michael’s life. I don’t think it’s awful, but it just doesn’t hold a candle to the original. Mickey, I only have one thing to say to you:

Don't mess with me!

Don’t mess with me!

Sorry! Back to the film…

So Randy still is in love with Sidney, and I personally hate how the directors never put them together. I wanted Randy to win the girl. But sadly, that’s not in his future.

Scream 2 geek get the girl

He checks up on Sidney who is scared about everything happening again.

scream 2 start again

We are then introduced to the rest of the crew. Sidney’s new boyfriend Derek (Jerry O’Connell),  his best friend Mickey (Timothy Olyphant) and…wait a sec. Timothy Olyphant? the sexy guy from Deadwood and Justified? He’s in this film???? Woaaaaaah!! This dude is one incredible actor. He goes from yucky creep:

Uber Creep!!!

Uber Creep!!!

to:

look behind watching

Excuse me again. Sorry! And Sydney’s best friend Hallie (Elise Neal). (Funny it mimics the old crew. In Scream: Sidney, Randy, Billy, Stu, & Tatum. Scream 2: Sidney, Randy, Derek, Mickey, & Hallie. 3 boys and 2 girls). Soon to join them is Deputy Dewey, as he wants to watch over Sidney and make sure she is okay. He does suffer from a limp and other ailments, as his stabbing almost killed him. Following after him is Gale, who is once again, not received well.

verbalbeatdown

Meanwhile Sidney continues to get harassed on the phone:

when-a-stranger-calls

“Sydney: Hello? Hello?

Phone Voice: Hello Sidney.

Sydney: Yes?

Phone Voice: What’s your favorite scary movie?

Sydney: Who is this?

Phone Voice: You tell me.

Sydney: [picks up caller ID] Cory Gillis, 555-0176.

Phone Voice: S***!

Sydney: Hot flash Cory…

Phone Voice: S***!

Sydney: …prank calls are a criminal offense prosecuted under penal code 653M.

[caller hangs up]

Sydney: Hope you enjoyed the movie.”

Meanwhile, that night in a sorority house, Cici, the girl from the film class (and played by Sarah Michelle Geller) recieves a lot of phone calls and is attacked that night.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Making her

Victim #3

Victim #3

That night Sidney gets attacked by ghostface, and just manages to get out okay with Derek’s help. He saves her but gets a flesh wound in the process. She is then is given two policemen bodyguards to protect her.

The next day, Sidney is totally freaking out, as she herself also gets attacked. Derek tries to make her feel better by singing her a Partridge Family song, I Think I Love You:

This is one of my all time favorite songs! I find it so incredibly romantic!

So romantic!

So romantic!

And gives her his Greek letters for protection.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Derek NO!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Have you not seen any horror films?!!!!

princess Bride Victim to classic blunder Vizzini

 

This is why Randy is awesome, he would know about this and he would not make this stupid mistake. OMG movie heroes make this mistake all the freakin’ time. The Wolf Man, The Mummy, Draculaetc. If you have been given a necklace just for you DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT GIVE IT AWAY! IF YOU DO YOU WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Every single time! I mean it is true that this is just Greek letters and not something given by Van Helsing, or a Gypsy ,or whatever, but still. If you hadn’t given it away you wouldn’t have marked yourself as a dead man. Just saying.

Ouch

Ouch

Randy and Dewey meet up to try and figure out who the killer might be. While they are discussing it, they see clips from the film Stab. Now I do have to say I love the movie within the movie as they show scenes from the film. And good job Wes on continuity. In Scream, Sidney mentions how she wouldn’t be lucky to have a great actress play her, she’d probably end up with Tori Spelling.

Randy also goes over the rules for sequels.

And also discusses our potential killers. Is it Derek, the boyfriend? Could Sydney have made the same mistake twice? How about creepy Mickey? Or the supposedly sweet Hallie?

Everyone's a suspect!

Everyone’s a suspect!

Sidney, meanwhile is suffering from PTSD. She is supposed to be the star of the school play, but has a complete breakdown in rehearsal.

And this is something that makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. I know Wes did it this way so that when Ghostface is attacking her she can go all loca, but still who would ever be in a play where people in freakin’ masks are attacking you? There is no way whatsoever that someone with that much trauma would dare even do that. I’m sorry, but I just don’t believe it.

You-serious?-Not-happening-babe!

Now I want to take a brief sidebar from the film (I know again…sorry!) But let me just say that I love how this film is such a great representation of the ’90s. You have that one side of the culture with the dark clothing very goth (Sidney and Gale). And on the other hand you have the prep look with floral and pastels (Derek and Hallie). You have everyone running around in denim, stonewash of course. Ah, it’s such a throwback. They even give a Saved By the Bell reference, and call each other bonehead. Oh ’90s.

Sidney_&_Friends Scream 2

Anyways back to the film. So Randy, Dewey, and Gale have now teamed up to try and find the killer. Poor Randy. He loves Sidney so much, but she won’t give him the time of day. Now I cannot understand why Sidney won’t date Randy. Randy is awesome. He has great taste in film. He is tall and buff. He does a great British accent. Why Sid? Why? He’s perfect.

perfection

So they get a call, and while Randy talks to ghostface, Dewey and Gale hunt around the area trying to find the murderer.

Victim #4

Victim #4

RANDY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

padme-youre-breaking-my-heart-gif-1

Why, why why!!!!!! Why did Randy have to die? Why?????????!!!!!!!!! Just like the garage scene was the biggest mistake of Scream, killing Randy was the biggest mistake you could make for the sequel. Randy was awesome. Randy was hot. Randy was the only one who had seen horror films. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

right in the feels broken heart

So Sidney, even though her life is threatened, has schoolwork to do. She goes to the library and her guards go to the other side of the building.

SayWhat?

MeanGirls I know right!

WHY AREN’T THEY NEXT TO HER?

Then Sidney gets threatened and her bodyguards take off to investigate.

Say What

So what is up with Sidney’s bodyguards? Do they want her to die? She gets threatened and they live her alone to investigate. SHE WAS JUST THREATENED!!!!! DO YOU WANT HER TO DIE??????? Ugh! One of you should have stayed while the other went out looking.

hmm_yes_i_see_youre_a_moron_trollcat

While they are gone Cotton Weary comes onto Sidney. I’m sure you guys remember Cotton. He was played by Liev Schreiber, and was the man that Sidney thought had murdered her mother. He had been released after the whole Stu & Billy issue. He’s been trying to reach Sidney to have her go on TV with him and discuss the past, but she has been ignoring him.

Scream 2 Doubts

Okay Cotton is a real creep. The way he just pops out of nowhere and how he is obsessed with Sidney, I’m having Phantoms flashbacks. Let me just say that I don’t like Liev Schieber. I think he is creepy in everything! (Well except Kate & Leopold). 

Certified Creepo Ribbon

So after that they decide to take Sydney and Hallie to a safe house. She stops to say good-bye to Derek, but it turns out he gets kidnapped by his frat brothers as he is going to get a beat down for giving away his letters.

post-32452-this-is-a-fight-gif-we-are-fig-xWvc

Okay this is a weird scene. Seriously what is with all the Troy references? They are doing a Greek tragedy about Troy as their school play. The Greek frat/Sorority yells about how this is for Troy and call themselves gods. Who talks like that? What is their obsession with Troy in this film?

whatsthedeal

Anyways, so the four of them are on their way to a safe house, when Sydney asks the cops where they are going. They tell her that they can’t, because if they tell her, then they’ll have to kill her.

Ryan-Gosling-Oh-No-You-Didnt-Half-Nelson

Sydney is being threatened BY A KILLER AND YOU THINK MAKING A JOKE ABOUT KILLING HER IS FUNNY?

jerk_alert32

Like dude really? Bad form, bad form

Darcy P&P OMG Can't Even

I mean like

Get out

Anyways, back to the film.

So as they are driving they get attacked by Ghostface.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Now this makes no sense to me. How did Ghostface know where they were going? I mean they were taking her to a secure location, a safe house, yet he reaches the intersection way before them. I mean he could have guessed they would exit and go down that way, but every campus has at least four exits, how did he know they weren’t going to double back? And how did he make it there on foot? And what was his plan if they didn’t happen to get a red light? I mean he is on foot, and they will be driving at least 35m/hr, maybe faster.

Shame on you!

Shame on you!

So the two take a really long time, trying to get out of the car without disturbing ghostface. They make it out and start running away. When Sidney decides to go back and take a look at who the killer is.

No thank you

This isn’t the time to stay there, this is the time to RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Scream 2

She goes back, but the killer has magically disappeared and kills Hallie. Bringing our total to:

Victim #5, 6, & 7

Victim #5, 6, & 7

The body count is racking up!

Sidney, finally takes the right advice and runs away, toward the theater/film department/building.

run-away

Meanwhile, Gale and Dewey go are in the theater to check out the film department and look at some tapes.

Ringu Watch TV

While their things get a little heated. Now Dewey and Gale, tsk. tsk. What is this Twin Peaks? You are going to sex while there is a killer loose?

clueless twin peaks

But they get interrupted by a tape that shows images from Cici’s murder, Randy’s, and then the two of them. Ghostface then chases them around stabbing Dewey in the process. Now Gale manages to outrun him for quite a while and it is  pretty B.A. how Gale is attacking and trying to take Ghostface down. The whole chase scene with Gale and the killer is very reminiscent of Jurassic Park. The raptors and Ghostface could be best buds.

27c_jurassic-park-image-4

Sidney has reached the stage, where she sees Derek tied up. She goes to help him when ghostface comes upon her and reveals himself to be……….

dun-dun-duuuun

Uber Creep!!!

Uber Creep!!!

Mickey

Yep, Mickey is crazy and the killer. He tells Sidney that he isn’t working alone, but has a partner.

“Mickey: Don’t you know, history repeats itself? Hmm, Sid? [removes mask to reveal Mickey; uses voice-changer] Surprise, Sidney.

Derek: What the f***?

Mickey: Since Derek here disappeared on my a**, I’ve been on my own, all f****** night. Thanks a lot, partner.

Derek: You motherf*****! Sid, you know me better than that. Untie me.

Sydney: Oh my god, Derek!

Derek: No, no, no… Sid.

Mickey: It’s okay, Derek. We got her.

Derek: No, no, Sid, listen to me. You know me better than that. He’s lying.

Mickey: What do you think, Derek? Sidney’s experiencing a little deja vu?

Derek: Sid, he’s lying! The man is lying! Sid, untie me! Untie me!”

So now Sidney is caught between the two. Could she have made the same mistake?

What else could go wrong?

What to do

Before Sidney can make a decision Mickey shoots Derek in the chest. Bringing us to:

Victim #8

Victim #8

Mickey: You should really deal with your trust issues Sid: I mean, poor Derek. He’s completely innocent and such a nice boy too. He’s bright and funny and handsome. Decent singing voice. And he was going to be a doctor. This is just the kinda boy you’d like to take home to mom. If you had a mom.”

Mickey tells Sidney to look behind her and she his partner. She does and it is Gale

What the

But behind Gale is another reporter who had been around earlier, Debbie Salt. The women who Sidney recognizes as Mrs. Loomis, Billy’s mom.

OMG

Now what’s really interesting about Scream 2 is that the cast didn’t know who the killer was until the last day. They had kept it a big secret and had actually gone through multiple endings with different killers. Everyone from Derek, Hallie, Mrs. Loomis, and Cotton; before settling on the deadly duo of Mickey and Mrs. Loomis.

Anyways, so Billy’s mom and Mickey have been working together. Mickey wanted to kill because he wanted to get caught and use horror films as his defense at trial. Mrs. Loomis, shoots Mickey who shoots Gale and knocks her off the stage. She then turns to Sidney and explains her real reasons behind it all. Pulling a Mrs. Voorhees, she wants to get back at the person who killed her son.

Pamela Voorhees: [high voice] Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! Don't let her get away, Mommy! Don't let her live! [normal voice] Pamela Voorhees: I won't, Jason. I won't!

Pamela Voorhees: [high voice] Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! Don’t let her get away, Mommy! Don’t let her live!
[normal voice] I won’t, Jason. I won’t!

After Mrs. Voor…Loomis is about to slit Sidney’s throat, when Cotton comes on the scene.

I love this ending. Even though Cotton is a total creep and this is the meanest thing ever, I just love that he blackmails her into giving him the interview.

Gale is alive and after she joins the group. Mickey seems to wake up, but Sidney shoots both Mickey and Mrs. Precott.

Gale-Randy-Billy-and-Sidney-scream-23148646-499-198

Dewey is alive and gets taken to the hospital and Cotton gets his interview as the hero of the night.

TheEnd_Title_2

So tell me Wes Craven, how does Dewey survive another extreme stabbing and live? How does he live and not Randy? Randy is awesome, why’d he have to die? Why. I’m still not over that. Wes Craven you break my heart.

Wes Craven and I

Wes Craven and I

Tune in next Saturday for the third installment

1997_scream-2

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to Happily Ever Aftermath

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For more on the Scream saga, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?

For more on Wes Craven, go to Kruegar Town

For more horror parody, go to A Deliciously Creepy Tale

For more on slasher film, go to It’s Coming From Inside the House

For more on Friday the 13th, go to Camp Blood

For more great sequels, go to The Boys Are Back in Town

For more films that spanned sequels, go to I’ll Be Back

For more of my fav songs, go to Rock You Like a Hurricane 

What is This Thing?: Phantoms (1998)

Just what is this thing? Chaos, chaos in the flesh.

Phantoms is a 1998 film that is based on the book by Dean Koontz. The story is very creepy, and I was surprised at how well the film was done. I thought it was going to be done in a very stupid, silly way; but it was the essence of creepiness. The only thing I didn’t care for was Liev Schreiber, I felt that he didn’t portray the character very well in the beginning. I wouldn’t have chosen Rose McGowan either, but she did surprisingly well. I loved Ben Affleck as the sexy Sheriff and love interest. I love Ben Affleck though, I mean who doesn’t? They changed the film from the book, as expected, but the changes do not destroy the film, thank goodness. If you’d like to watch the film go here. So the film starts out with Dr. Jennifer Pailey bringing her trouble-making sister Lisa to live with her. They are hoping the change of scenery will help straighten her out as she was involved with gang members in Los Angelas.

I want to go back to LA

When they reach the town, it is empty. Like really empty. There is no one out and about even though they are in a ski town, in the middle of winter with great snow.

Gilmore girls creep

They continue on home. When Jennifer gets there she finds her housekeeper dead. All the life had been sucked out of her and she looks burned.

[Note: Pic from The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms not Phantoms

[Note: Pic from The Giant Behemoth not Phantoms]

OMG

The girls are widely freaked and decided to head to the sheriff’s. But there is one problem, their car won’t work.

Oh no!

Oh no!

The girls hurry on to the sheriff’s office where they find a deputy, burned and blackened. He appears to have shot his gun at something, but they don’t find any traces of it, except shells. Dr. Jennifer grabs a gun and the two run off to the bakery, as it is getting dark and they are really freaked out. They head to the baker’s, running quickly as they hear sounds as if someone is following them. When they get there the oven goes off revealing severed heads!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!

The girls are completely grossed out and confused when the Sheriff (who ex-FBI) finds them.

Hello Sexy!

Hello Sexy!

With him are his two deputies Steve Shanning (Nicky Katt) and Stuart Wargle (Liev Shreiber) have come to investigate. They decide the best thing to do is go to the sheriff’s department, and just when they do every single horn, siren, whistle, bell, etc. goes off and then suddenly stops. The only lights left on are down on the Candleglow Inn up the street.

What the

They check it out and see that only four guests are registered. The Sheriff and Stu go upstairs, while the girls stay behind with deputy Steve.

While the sheriff is upstairs he goes into a room and starts looking through an opening in a closet. When he does he sees a vision of a young boy with a gun, which disappers. You see when the Sheriff was FBI he accidentally shot a boy, which made him quit and turn to small town life.

Aw! Look at his face. :(

Aw! Look at his face. 😦

Stu goes in the other room and finds a beautiful, dead woman. He sits next to her and puts his hand up her leg…

ew! Gross Yuck

What a perv!

Certified Creepo Ribbon

Then the Sheriff walks in. He lets it go, even though he is severely grossed out as he knows what Stu was doing, but he needs every man he can get as he has no idea what the situation is.

The Sheriff has Stu watch the hall as he continues checking things out. Stu comes on to Lisa who tells him flat out no, she is not digging that.

I don't think so

Dr. Jennifer joins the Sheriff and they discover that a bathroom locked from the inside (that has no other windows or doors) is empty, with something written on the mirror in lipstick. The writing says “Dr. Timothy Flyte–The Ancient Enemy“.

Phantoms Timothy Flyte Ancient Enemy mirror Note

 

The two have no idea who Dr. Flyte is but intend on finding out.  In another empty room they find a bunch of metal objects like jewelry, buttons, watches, gold teeth, a pacemaker, etc.; concluding that this thing, whatever it is strips a person completely of everything, if it chooses.

EW!

EW!

They go back into the lobby to regroup and figure out their next step. But then they suddenly hear a woman crying out “Help me!” and Deputy Steve rushes out to save her. The Sheriff follows him, but when he gets outside all that is left of Steve is his shoes and a gun.

What the

They head back to the Sheriff’s office and put the dead deputy in a body bag. They then call for help–military, Dr. Flyte, anybody, but the line was so bad they don’t know whether or not it went through.

AAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

AAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! [Note: from When a Stranger Calls not Phantoms]

Bryce and Stu go through the dept. and pull out all their ammunition getting ready for–whatever the thing is that is trying to attack them. The lights go out and the creature takes on a Alien/The Thing (1982) feel. The next thing you know, Stu is dead.

victim

Too be honest, good riddance. He was a creep and I didn’t like him.

IDon'tTrustHimGreatGatsby

They also put Stu in a body bag and wait out the night.

We then switch to another part of the country- Dr. Flyte. Dr. Flyte (Peter O’Toole) is a tabloid worker in New York City. He used to a professor at Oxford, but they let him go as they felt his writings were “too silly”.

Phantoms Swine Peter O' Toole

 

Two FBI agents ask him to go to the small, winter, town of Snowfield to help solve what the “thing” is.

Back in Snowfield the three survivors are trying to figure out what to do next. Lisa tries to take a nap while the Sheriff tells Dr. Jen about how the monster called up the incident with the young boy. The two are interrupted when Lisa asks the Sherif to walk with her to the bathroom. He checks it and finds it clear. Lisa begins to smoke when she hears a squealing noise coming out of the drain.

Psycho-Shower

She checks out the bathroom stalls (much like Scream) and finds the Deputy Stu there!

im-back

 

Scream-Casey-Becker-drew-barrymore-31896958-2560-1088

In the book the “Phantom thing” was more like the Blob from The Blob (1958); although it could take on the shape of other things, or create small phantom pieces of itself. In the film, however, the “Phantom” embodies the form of Stu, which is understandable from a filmmaker point of view. It doesn’t copying The Blob at all, as I mentioned earlier copying The Thing. Just like The Thing, the “phantom” takes on the appearance of something. This wasn’t a horrible decision as I bet it was easier to film. They also did a lot of blackout or limited lighting when the creature was in its true form, which allowed it to remain creepy as your imagination creates it. The director of It (1990)  should have used the same technique, it would have been a better film.

I didn’t really care for Liev Schreiber, and thought he could have been much creepier. Instead he just comes off as a pervert. This film has actually ruined him for me in all other films. When I watch Kate & LeopoldScream, Scream 2, Scream 3, Lee Daniel’s the Butler, or X-Men Origins: Wolverine; I keep expecting him to do something perverted to all the women.

Yes I am

Yes I am

Anyways, back to the story. So the Sheriff goes into the bathroom and can’t find anything. They go down to check the body bags, but both are empty.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meanwhile Dr. Flyte is on route to Snowfield with military General Leland Copperfield, some mobile labs, an armored strike van, etc–all ready to take on whatever the “thing” is. They ask Dr. Flyte about “the Ancient Enemy”. Dr. Flyte explains that there were creatures, he calls “Ancient Enemy” who are amoeboid shapeshifters. This Ancient Enemy rarely feeds, but when it does, the effects are devastating and it was theorized that the Enemy either caused or aided in the extinction of the dinosaurs, the destruction of the Mayan civilizationRoanoke disappearance, the missing army of Nanking, China in 1939, etc. And the town appears to have been built on the home of one of these “Ancient Enemies”.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

The group arrives to Snowfield and the three survivors come to meet the army. The next thing you know, “the thing” has taken out almost the whole team using its shape-shifting qualities and the pipes/sewers. Now these scenes are pretty intense. I was watching them and screaming and my roommates were all, are you ok? I highly recommend watching this film.

General Copperfield is last of the military to be killed; as a pair of oily black tentacles seeps up through the pavement, penetrates his hazmat suit, and smothers him.

[Note: From The Mist]

[Note: From The Mist]

This leaves Dr. Flyte, Sheriff Bryce, Jenny, and Lisa as the remaining survivors..

He’s dead but the “Phantom” uses his body as a mouthpiece and begins speaking to the crowd.

 “My Flesh. Study it. Write the gospel. But do not try to leave. Witnesses to the Miracle.”

Phantoms

The body then falls to the ground and an oily black substance comes out along with a gecko, of which the group is supposed to get a sample of. Dr. Flyte begins to analyze the sample, coming to the conclusion it has lived in the depths of the earth for eons, growing to immense size, and absorbing knowledge from its prey. It can separate off parts of Itself to send as drones, warriors, phantoms, etc.–having them assume the shapes of anything or anyone It has absorbed; even of people or monsters from memories and dreams.With these, It has manipulated Bryce, Jenny, and Lisa into bringing Dr. Flyte here, to be Its prophet, and to write Its gospel. For It has begun to think of Itself as God–or the Devil. Indestructible. All-Powerful. Immortal. Unstoppable.

This is bad. Very bad.

This is bad. Very bad.

Dr. Flyte’s analysis reveals that It is similar to oil and if they are able to make the same kind of bacteria that eats away at oil spills, they may just have a chance at stopping it. They create cultures and prepare for the final battle.

Dr. Flyte goes out and calls to the creature.

Fantomy_Phantoms_1998_1266246010-25163.jpg

He tells It that he needs to see all of it in order to write Its “gospel”. He says that the others are creating a weapon against It, that they don’t believe in It like he does. It appears first as a single person, but then becomes all 400 residents of the town, merging and melding into one swirling mass, which resolves Itself into an immense, hideous, upright millipede.

The Sheriff, Jenny and Lisa run and fire the guns loaded with the bacteria culture  into It. This causes It to scream.  Jenny and Lisa run for shelter into the nearby deputy’s office, to reload their guns but are pursued by a drone of Deputy Stu.

Deputy Wargle: Oh, you've got some guns, ladies, you wouldn't shoot an unarmed man, would you? [both women cock shotguns and point them at him] Deputy Wargle: That's a dumb question.

Deputy Wargle: Oh, you’ve got some guns, ladies, you wouldn’t shoot an unarmed man, would you? [both women cock shotguns and point them at him] That’s a dumb question.

They empty their shotguns into him, knocking him down, and blowing away huge chunks of his legs and arms. Tentacles shoot out of his arm and leg stumps. The girls run away and and he follows, but is killed by Dr. Jen as she shoots him with the last of the culture.

The bigger entity is falling apart and the Sheriff follows the last of It down into the sewer, finding him face to face with the boy that he killed. He hesitates, and while he does so, a tentacle shoots out of the boy’s mouth, and knocks him down. His gun with the culture is stolen by It. It pulls the vials out and starts taunting the Sheriff. In response to It’s mockings the Sheriff pulls out his gun and shoots the vials, causing the bacteria to spread all over.

Hello Sexy!

With one final ear-shattering scream It is gone, and Bryce makes his way back to the others. As a helicopter arrives to rescue them, Dr. Flyte announces to the others that the Entity has won after all: It wanted him to tell the world, and that’s just what he’s going to do. Everything seems to end well, or well enough. Dr. Flyte has his story and will win back his prestige; Sheriff Bryce  is no longer traumatized about killing the boy; Dr. Jen and Sheriff Bryce have found each other; and Lisa and Dr. Jen have bonded. Sounds as perfect an ending you can get for a horror film.

TheEnd_Title_2

Uh, uh uh. Not quite yet!

We switch to a scene in a bar where Dr. Flyte is in TV talking about It and how it may still be out there waiting. One of the guys in the bar turns to his companion and says its a lot of hooey. A strange laugh is heard and at the end of the bar is Deputy Stu Wrangle, showing that It is still alive.

dun-dun-duuuun

So it really was a good film, and I’m telling you the scenes with the creature are super creepy!!! You’ll love them if you love scary movies!

phantoms-

So unlike the other facebook cover pages I have made (and you should have guessed by now that practically every post has one) I made two for this one as the first one wasn’t working out right. Here’s the second one for those of you interested.

1998_phantoms-

Comment below which you think is better!

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to Unleash the Savage Instincts That Lie Hidden Within

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For more monster movies, go to Let Them Fight

For more films based on books, go tA Bit Pottery About Jane Austen

For more on Rose McGowan, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?

For more on Ben Affleck, go to Pot o’ Gold

The Teddy Bear that Would NOT Die!

evil_shadow_teddy_bear_by_fureox-d5yb3uw

Now I know I’ve been talking about this forever! I mention all the time how there was a demon bear, the bear that would not leave, etc. I keep promising and promising you guys that I would tell the story, but just haven’t gotten around to it. However, I was reviewing my old posts and decided that it is finally time to do it.

So back in high school there was this one boy, Scott, that liked me. He would do the standard guy thing trying to get my attention, but I pretty much ignored him. I have to admit I was pretty mean back in the day. One day he tried to make a move and sneak attacked me, asking me out.

Not quite this bad

Not quite this bad

 

I was unnerved and told him maybe, just trying to get out of there. He never asked me again, and I thought that was the end of it.

It wasn’t.

So that was in November/December and the months rolled by…February comes up and then its V-Day.

Now I have had a love/hate relationship with Valentine’s Day for a long time. I used to always get sick right around it, and then had to wait to eat the candy until much later. And its not just sick, but like a, everything coming out. 

So this year I was pretty happy. I was feeling good, and thought I wouldn’t get sick. It was Thursday the 13th, so you know not on guard for anything, but I should have been. No wonder this bear was a demon.

So its Valentine’s Day and I’m chilling with my friends as I have given them Valentine Cards and were eating candy. Its break between classes when Scott walks in the door with a giant teddy bear that says “I Love You” in a pilllow he’s holding and a red rose.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m like eternally freakin’ here. I have never been schooled in this situation. A RED ROSE?!! I LOVE YOU?!!! You haven’t spoken to me in two months what could have possibly made you think that this was the best move? Are you crazy?

clueless twin peaks

I just stare at it for a bit, some of my friends saying its adorable while the others say I don’t have to accept it if I don’t want it. I end up going to the bathroom and getting sick. The V-day flu stalk me again (although after this year I never experienced it again.)

So I took the bear and stuff and left it at home. I shoved the bear in my closet trying to find a way to get rid of it. It would watch me with those button eyes, eternal smile, and “I Love You” pillow.

Don't be fooled by its cuteness, evil lurks in that heart.

Don’t be fooled by its cuteness, evil lurks in that heart.

Tried to donate it but somehow, it kept being forgotten or left behind, continuing to lurk in my room.

So a few months later I was in this anti-gambling play, while being performed in April, was set in February. One of the characters in the play falls for this girl, who only cares a fraction for him, and gets her this huge gift. They needed something, and I was like take it, take this bear I don’t want it.

After the play finished, my friend Eliot was talking about how great it would be to have that bear, joking around that he could save it and use it for next year. Well, he may have been joking, but I wasn’t. I told him he could have, as I REALLY did not want it.

take-it-please-32129662702

So I was like, yeah that’s the end of it. Sucess! 🙂

Inspector-Gadget

Until…bum bum bum! He left it behind! HE LEFT IT BEHIND!!!!!!

im-back

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How could he do this to me! How could this bear still be here? Why, why, why?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, once again it was in my life. I put it in the closet this time and it would just rest there with its horrible happy face. I would try to get rid of it but it just wouldn’t go. I was starting to feel as if I was cursed. Maybe this was some sort of punishment. I don’t know. 😦

A few months later, my friend Amelia’s mother was doing a toy drive, and was collecting bears. I was so excited!

 

Yes!

Yes!

So I would bring the bear out when Amelia would come over, I would try to pawn it off any chance I got, but she would always forget to take it!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

 

So here I was, with the bear once again. I was starting to feel like it was Talking Tina from The Twilight Zone. Would I ever get rid of it? Would it try to kill me? Was I safe?

Again I tried. I tried and tried and tried and tried again to get rid of it, but nothing worked out. Everytime, everytime it would just come back.

Then I was invited to a White Elephant party and I knew it was the best thing. I took it to the party and it was the largest gift there so I know someone would take it. I would sit and watch, waiting and hoping for someone to pick it.

take-it-please-32129662702

Finally it was picked and gone. And I breathed a sigh of relief. My friend liked it and has kept it to the best of my knowledge.

Sometimes though I have nightmares of it coming back. That one day I’m going to wake up and see it in the corner of my room.

teddy_bear_i_love_you-EVIL

Just like I still get creeped out over this guy

Furby

But that’s another story

 For more creepy tales check out Hororfest and Horrorfest IIand keep you eyes peeled for Horrorfest III coming this October.

Also look at Kruegar Town

And Final Destination: Bike Edition

And Bad Penny

 

A Trip to the Mall Turns into the Twilight Zone

So if you’ve been around since the very, very beginning of the creation of this blog, then you will remember that this isn’t my first blog. You see, I read this book Considering Lily, and the main character in there reminded me of myself and made me want to create a blog like she does. My friend Elaine also encouraged me after we had a particularly strange encounter at the mall. That blog was called My Life is a Movie. However, I stupidly forgot to bookmark the page and when I tried to go back to write more on that blog I could not find it at all. I also discovered that there are many, many, many, many blogs who share that name or a variation of it. I gave up and decided blogging wasn’t for me. That is until six months later, after I had finished reading Emma. I loved the book and saw so many similarities that I decided to create a blog, and that dear readers is how Jane Austen Runs My Life was born.

cropped-jatitle2.jpgAnd, that in case you were all wondering, is why it is not only about Jane Austen. That’s how this blog started out, but it quickly expanded into other films and books. However, my Austiniteness will always be the core of these blogs.

Anyways, so what about this Twilight Zone title? Well, I was cleaning through some files and I found two pics I had created and saved from that orginal blog and story. I decided to treat you all with this time capsule as I try and relate this adventure that happened two years ago. I’m so sorry of I leave anything out. So now we shall take a seat in my time machine Delorean and  go back to February 10 or 11 2012 (I know it was before V-Day)

Gonna Go Back in Time!

Since this is a past memory, it must be written in italics. You know, kinda like an old-fashioned diary or something.

So the other day my friend Elaine and I decided that we would go to the mall. She wanted to go to Bed, Bath, and Beyond for something and I wanted to pick something up from Bare Escentuals. She decided to put on her GPS, but there was just one problem. GPSs HATE ME! Every time I get in a car with one we end up in the middle of nowhere, we go in the opposite direction, the GPS malfunctions, takes us through the creepiest areas, etc. I’m not kidding, it is literally every time. I mean once my friend went to the Super Target in the next town, and the next week was going to give me and two of our other friends a ride. Even though she had saved the route from the week before, this next time because I was in the car it took us as far away as possible, even though it said it was saving the exact route.

So we are driving around, when the GPS tells us it has to recalculate. We both look at each other:

Say What

Like what the heck GPS you had nooo reason to recalculate. We didn’t make any wrong turns, or do anything to screw you up. What are you doing? And the little evil thing decided that it was  going to keep doing that to us.

GPS

It just kept doing that nonstop! Recalculate, recalculate, recalculate, again and again and again!!! It made both of annoyed, but I just wanted to take that thing and toss it out the window.

ARRRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!

ARRRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!

You know I really didn’t like that movie, but I use this screenshot a loooot. It really expresses my emotions sometimes.

So, of course I didn’t toss the GPS, it belonged to my friend. Instead we had to use a mixture of her phone GPS and our memory of where we thought the mall was. We ended up getting there and thought, well everything will be fine and normal now, right? WRONG!!!!

So we park the car and head into Forever 21 so that we could get into the mall and get the items we needed. As we enter Forever 21 we look around the store, and look, and look, and look; and can’t find a way out!

AHHHHHHH!!!!

AHHHHHHH!!!!

I am serious there is NO WAY OUT!  We can’t even find the way we entered. I’m like I”M STUCK IN HERE FOREVER!!!!!!! THAT’S WHY IT’S CALLED FOREVER 21, I WILL BE IN HERE FOR 21 YEARS!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so let’s get serious. I felt like I was going to be stuck in there, but not for years. Just hours. So the reason we couldn’t find a way out was that it turns out that they had all these mirrors hanging strategically in front of the doors, so unless you looked at the doors from an angle you would only see the clothes reflected back, therefore leaving one to think the store extended farther than it did, and that there was no way out.

Whoever designed that store was like Jigsaw level of sadistic and psychotic.

Whoever designed that store was like Jigsaw level of sadistic and psychotic.

I’m serious, those designers and planners were just plan mean and cruel. Who does that?

So after we had survived the dastardly Forever 21, we continued to our destination, when Elaine says she has to use the bathroom. So we decide that we are not going back into Forever 21, but look through the place for other bathrooms. We found them, but you had to walk down this hallway with black and white checkerboards. We walk and walk and walk and walk  and walk and walk…. Yeah it just seems to go on forever. And those white and black checkerboard tiles, give the hall an appearance of shrinking that we start to feel as if we are in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory or something! 

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Except sadly there was no chocolate or Gene Wilder in this adventure.

gene wilder

So we finally reach the bathroom, and go in. But when we come out it feels so weird. It feels like we have been in the mall for hours and hours, or even days. We both started joking around that when we finally got back to the mall we would be entering the 1960s or something. I have expected Rod Serling to pop out at any moment and say “What started out as just an average day for those two girls, turned out to be a shortcut…into…THE TWILIGHT ZONE.”

To be perfectly honest, I love him so much I wouldn't care if he did pop up like that.

To be perfectly honest, I love him so much I wouldn’t care if he did pop up like that.

So the rest of the trip was pretty normal. We were both freaked out, that we got what we wanted and got outta there. We were able to get past the Forever 21 gauntlet/maze

I can do this....just have to wait for the right time

I can do this….just have to wait for the right time

We get out to the parking lot and when we do we CAN’T FIND THE CAR!

Dude-Where-is-My-Car

And NO we were not high. So we are walking up rows looking for it. Joking, and half-believing, that we will find out that it is parked in a completely different area or back on campus. We finally find it and head home. 

Yep what an adventure right? You might not believe me but its true.

Like that's happen

I swear. And I have never been back to that Forever 21 because it is tooo creepy to do that again. Stick to the Disney store, its safe. 🙂

On the 8th Day ‘Til Christmas: Holiday in Handcuffs (2007)

On the 8th day ’til Christmas  my blogger gave to me

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Holiday in Handcuffs (2007)

This film is another one of those that goes under the cliché of two people who can’t stand each other being stuck together for a period of time; and then end up falling in love. This copies the film, It Happened One NightThat is such an influential film that I promise you I will do a review on it.

So this film was made by abc family, a part of their 25 Days of Christmas. It stars the amazing Melissa Joan Hart; sparking her return to acting; along with the very handsome Mario Lopez. I had the biggest crush on Mario Lopez when he was A.C. Slater on Saved by the Bell. (Although he was my second, my heart first belonged to Mark-Paul Gosselaar).

So the film starts out with Trudy, (MJH), being ragged on by her parents. In everything she’s been in lately, she always has mean parents, it makes you wonder if they are really like that.

Hmm

Hmm

Anyways, her mom is complaining about Trudy. Everything about her and she does is wrong. In fact, one thing her mother always complains about is Trudy’s hair, so she decided she would get a perm “to fix” it. It doesn’t turn out as planned as she completely wrecks her hair.

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Because she was distracted by her hair and a phone call from her mother she also misses a job interview.

What else could go wrong?

What else could go wrong?

When she gets to work, Raj’s Diner, her boyfriend stops by. Instead of going with her to her Christmas Family Reunion, he dumps her.

mary_bennetCan't get a break

Trudy has a complete breakdown, kidnapping the next guy she sees, David (Mario Lopez), and takes him with her. She has a 19th century gun, but David manages to slip on some ice making it much easier for Trudy to lug him in her car.

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Trudy ties him up with pantyhose and her scarf. She explains the situation and starts to tell him a little bit about herself. She runs out of gas and has to go get some, but the attendant comes out to pump her gas and sees David tied up. Trudy hurriedly explains that he’s her bf and they are going away for a weekend of “fun”. He runs back to his store and Trudy hurries to pump the gas before he gets back, worried he is going to call the cops. As the attendant comes out, he gives her free furry handcuffs for her “weekend”.

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So every Christmas Trudy’s family rents out a place for Christmas where they can be away from the world. No cellphones, phones, or any electronics are allowed. This year they are going to a cabin far out in the middle of nowhere. She takes David there, but first goes into the cabin to tell her parents that “Nick”, (as she is pretending David is Nick ), likes to pretend that he is kidnapped and doesn’t want to be there. When she brings David in, he starts yelling about him being kidnapped but all Trudy’s parents do is laugh. When her brother and sister also come in, they have the same result. Trudy also becomes the key-master, in charge of  hiding the phones and keys from everyone.

Its-so-crazy

Trudy also keeps an eye on David, by having him share the room with her; telling her mom that she’s old enough to sleep in the same room as her bf. They end up sharing a room with bunk beds. That night David tries to escape, and Trudy catches him, bringing him back to the cabin.

I don't think so

The next day, David catches Trudy on the phone, and the two fight over it until Trudy crushes it with a meat mallet. The mom lends David some of the dad’s old clothes, which are too small, causing him to be the butt of everyone’s jokes. When the mom needs something from the store, he and Trudy’s dad go out to get it. Trudy tries to stop them, but everyone convinces her it will be great “bonding time”. While the guys are gone, Trudy’s sister helps her with her hair; straightening it out.

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David and the dad drive out to the closest store,  which happens to be the same gas station that Trudy had stopped at before. When David tries to convince him that he was kidnapped and needs help; the man brings out a shotgun and tells him to go back to the pretty lady. David complies. As he and the dad are driving back; David tries to take the wheel, almost crashing them. The dad puts David in a chokehold and calms them down. When they get back, David is so bummed that he is still stuck there he flings himself down upon a chair. When he does that, his too-tight pants rip, and Trudy’s older brother comes to his rescue by lending him some of his clothes.

When he goes to get the clothes, David discovers that Trudy’s brother Jake has a phone. He borrows it and runs into the bathroom to hurriedly call his girlfriend, Jessica. When he reaches her, he can say nothing; because she is too busy yelling at him for standing her up.

007HIS_Gabrielle_Miller_002 HOliday in handcuffs not happy

I am not pleased

David is finally able to explain by bursting out that he was going to propose. Now this part made no sense to me. Jessica is the daughter of David’s boss, and used to the high life. And he was going to propose to her in a diner?

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

That makes no sense! You think he would pick something a little more classy than Raj’s Diner.

Anyways, he tells Jessica that he’s been kidnapped and to send help asap. Jessica promises to help, eagerly thinking of the ring she will be receiving.

By this time Trudy has figured out what is going on, and picks the lock on the door. She grabs the phone and tosses it in the toilet, but it’s too late by then. David laughs at her, and promises that he will be the best bf ever, just to make things worse when her family finds out what she did. He proves to be as her family tells him of all of Trudy’s secrets, has him put the angel on the top of the tree, make Trudy fetch David pie, and has him read Twas the Night Before Christmas. Trudy becomes extremely upset the way that her family seems to like David more than her.

After they read the book, the mom has them write out their Christmas lists and leaves Oreos and milk out for Santa. Here Trudy and David have a heart-to-heart. Trudy tells him that she is a disappointment to her parents and David tries to console her.

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The next day is Christmas, and in the morning Trudy and David spend the day out having fun. They play hockey and take a walk out in the snow. They both learn more about each other as David reveals that his parents died when he was about six, and was raised by his grandpa. He worked his way through college and studied architecture, becoming a developer only  because there was more money in it. Trudy realizes that while her family isn’t perfect there is plenty to be thankful for. She also tells David about the best Christmas she’s ever had. One year she was supposed to be in an ice-skating performance and it was canceled because of snow. She was so disappointed, that her father sprayed water over the patio, icing it up and decorated the whole area with lights so she could perform for them there.

Later, they go inside and play chess where they have some more heart-to-hearts and David realizes how sorry Trudy is for kidnapping him. They also just happen to walk under some mistletoe, causing the two to share a kiss and start up some feelings between the two.

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Later when David is cleaning up, he finds an album with photos of Trudy’s artwork. She does a lot of portraiture; very post-impressionism style. Trudy finds her mom, and discovers that not everything is perfect in her parent’s marriage.

zenon zetus lupetos

When present time comes around nobody gets what they want. Trudy receives a pink sweater, as her mom buys her one every year; Jake gets a tie; the Dad gets underwear; the mom a case of socket wrenches; and the grandma a mug that says “World’s Greatest Grandma”.  David got a backscratcher and Katie (Trudy’s sister) a book of all the law firms in the nation. Trudy is also given a briefcase, which starts another argument about Trudy’s need to get a “real job”. David can’t watch her parents be so cruel to Trudy, and interrupts telling them that her artwork is amazing. He also pulls out his ring for Jessica and proposes. It’s so sweet and romantic.

Double double yay

Meanwhile Jessica and the cops have tracked down Trudy’s friend and coworker to find out where Trudy is. They interrupt her and her boyfriend, and when the cops threaten her, she spills all.

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Back at the cabin, all are getting ready for Christmas dinner. In fact Trudy walks in on David getting ready, getting a great look at his bod. All I can say is I greatly appreciated the writers creating this scene.

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Right before dinner, David gets Trudy and tells her he has a Christmas surprise. He has recreated her prefect Christmas. He sprayed the patio so it was icy, and put lights up everywhere; and asks her to show him her ice-skating routine. She does and the two’s love for each other is cemented, but neither has realized it.

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You're_in_love_with_her

Christmas dinner arrives, and all hell breaks loose. Katie tells her parents that she dropped out of school and has used the tuition to start a pilates studio in CA. Jake reveals that he is gay and has been seeing a man for a long time. The parents tell all about their marital problems. Just as all is revealed, the cops break in arresting everyone and letting the cat out of the bag about the kidnapping.

ouch Hermione

Everyone spends the night in jail. The next day they are all released as David chooses to not press charges.

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Trudy realizes that she is in love with David, but puts herself into her painting, creating a piece about David’s Christmas surprise.

Meanwhile David is starting to see that Jessica isn’t the right person for him. He starts to reevaluate what his life is going to be like with her, and not quite pleased with what it will be like.

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As all this is happening, one of Trudy’s pieces is picked to be in a show. She invites her brother to come to it, and he brings along his boyfriend. At the show Trudy is surprised to see the rest of the family. The parents have been in counseling and all have promised to be more open with each other. Trudy’s piece also gets sold. However, her happiness is short-lived as she is heartbroken over David, he got married the Saturday before.

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Trudy leaves the show by herself, and is kidnapped. She is blindfolded and taken somewhere by………….David! David is the one who had purchased her picture and came to tell her he couldn’t marry Jessica. That not only is he in love with her, but she inspired him to create his own architectural firm. The film ends with the two being together; happily ever after!

Holiday in handcuffs kiss

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To start the 12 Posts of Christmas from the beginning, go to On the 12 Day ’til Christmas: The 12 Men of Christmas

For the previous post, go to On the 9th Day ’til Christmas: Borrowed Hearts

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For more on two who hate each other falling in love, go to I Don’t Want the Money

Secrets are Great, Unless You Get Caught: Perfect Stranger (2007)

Secrets are great. Unless you get caught.

So a week ago I had some free time and was flipping through channels, planning on just zoning out in front of the TV until my next class. I landed on FX and started watching this movie with Halle Berry and Bruce Willis. It seemed really good, but I couldn’t finish it as I had to run off to my next class. I decided to rent it  and finish watching it as the plot really intrigued me. Unfortunately; it wasn’t very good. I thought it had too many sexual scenes that were just awkward and painful to get through, I ended up having to fast forward through them all. I also thought they dropped the F-bomb too many times. I’m not one who curses at all, but I think everyone who does will agree with me that there are times when the F-Bomb is said too many times that it loses its meaning and makes the person just look stupid.

I also didn’t like Halle Berry’s character Ro. I thought that she was a mean, selfish jerk. Her friend Miles is head over heels crazy for her, and Ro knows this and instead of letting him off gently; she is totally rude to him, just using him for all the information he can get. Now I know I have been a total witch to guys (check out the Elton Saga: 1,2,& 3 plus lame lines  and flirting post), but at least I never toyed with a guys affections to get him to retrieve information for me.

The only really good part about this film is the end. It was amazing! I wish there was a way one could just watch it and understand the rest of the film.

Here are the links if you want to check it out yourself.

FYI Spolier Alert

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

So the movie starts out with Halle Berry’s character Ro, a journalist,  tricking a senator into revealing all of his dirty secrets.

Ro is pretty high on her recent sucess and goes out to celebrate with her best friend/computer whiz/guy madly in love with her that she doesn’t care for, Miles. After she becomes extrremely drunk, she ends up being told by her boss that they are burying the story. Extremely angry that her freedom of press is being stomped on, she quits.

She starts on home feeling angry and crappy. She’about to board the subway and head home, when her old school friend she hasn’t spoken to in years; and is really mad at, because she slept with her boyfriend, Grace approaches her.

Hey girl, what up?

Turns out Grace met this guy, ADEX, online and had cybersex with him, later meeting up with him in real life. It turns out that “ADEX” was really the rich and famous Harrison Hill. She and him had a big fling and now she is threatening to blackmail him. She also wants Ro to write this up for the paper and completely embarass Hill. Ro blows her off and continues on home.

A week later, Ro gets a call from Grace’s mom telling her Grace is thought to be dead. Ro goes and identifies the drowned body, confirming that it is Grace. From here Ro decides she is going to take on Hill, and get him for what he did. She enlists Miles who has all the knowledge and contacts to pull off a caper like this.

She starts working at Hill’s Ad agency and quickly makes friends with the biggest gossip there; thus learning all the dirty secrets on everyone. Apparently Hill has had many affairs, all of which his wife is tired of. In fact, if he does it one more time, she’s leaving him. Now you might think, so what? He can get along without her. Wrong-o! Turns out Hill has nothing, nada, zip! His wife has the money, the company, EVERYTHING! He wouldn’t dare let her know that he was having another affair or else he would be kicked to the curb. He pretends to be the dutiful husband, going along with her to fertility tanks, because his wife is infertile. Sounds like a motive to me.

Then Ro witnesses what Hill does to people he thinks are betraying him. He beats up on one of his employees that he thinks is spilling secrets to their competitor.

Don’t make me angry

So more and more he is looking like the villain. But is it ever that easy?

Now there are a lot of web chatting, and online sex, and gross things…between her, TruBlue (random guy she meets online), and ADEX.

Oh and Ro has these weird flashbacks throughout the film that involve her father. They don’t outright say it, but strongly hint that he was molesting/raping her as a child. At times they become a mishmash of flashback/present day dream/nightmarelike things. They get very confusing at times.

Then the movie gets intense again. Ro has pretty much confirmed that ADEX is Hill. And she starts talking to him online AT WORK! I mean COME ON! HOW STUPID CAN YOU BE?

I mean the stupidity level is on par with taking a shower when there are monsters running about. Just saying.

So of course she has stuff on her screen that she doesn’t want Hill to see, and he just HAS to come over to talk to her. The scene is actually pretty intense ands set up very well.

So Ro is able to get out of that tight spot, and turns down her boss’ offer to go out with him, wanting instead to keep things “professional”.

That night she meets up with Miles, once again being  complete dermo (a word I created for loser/jerk/b**** who uses someone. I actually found out the definition for the “true” word isn’t that far off. Cool, huh?) to him. Miles brings a friend who works with the coroner. Apparently Grace was not just drowned but drugged with Belladonna and had some put in her eyes. Hill’s wife’s family has donated a ton of money to medical research, a majority of that which used Belladonna. Hmm…suspicious. Also, after she was poisoned, Grace was drowned. She was also pregnant. Things are looking worse and worse for Hill.

*At this point in the film I have already decided that it is not Hill. It is way too obvious and I think that there is another character who has a stronger motive, Hill’s wife. What if Grace approached the wife right after talking to Ro. Maybe the wife was one of those women who couldn’t stand to lose her man and would take out any woman who dared try to take him from her. What if all those past affairs have just been compounding on her brain all these years, and she just snaps hearing about this one. But the most likely motive; she couldn’t bear to hear that after trying so long to be pregnant and being infertile, that this little tramp got pregnant by her husband. The one thing she could not do, being done by some harlot? That’s enough to drive any woman to the brink of insanity. It would be easy, all she would have to do is meet up with Grace to see the proof, give her a drink laced with the Belladonna, which of course would be easy for her to get, and kill her. If she didn’t want to do it herself she has plenty of money to hire someone to do it for her.

Anyways, so Ro goes out with Hill after all to try and probe his mind a little. She ends up being slightly charmed by him instead.

The next day he comes to pick her up and we see his wife is creepin’ on them from a taxi. Makes her look totally suspicious.

Ro is trying to get into Hill’s computer to get a look at his emails. Miles give her a spyware program on a flashdrive, but it tkes some time so she has to do it when Hill won’t be around. She waits until after work, when everyone is gone and sticks it in. Only prob is, Hill hasn’t left yet. She’s caught red-handed.

She ends up making up a dumb story involving a private joke the two shared the night they went out.

For some strange reason he buys her answer and takes her out to dinner. They are having fun, making out, etc; and Ro leaves to go to the bathroom. And she leaves her purse and phone behind.

Okay, hold up now, what woman does that? What woman would leave to go to the bathroom and not take her purse and phone. Bad call writers, bad call.

So while she is gone her phone goes off, and Hill decides that he’s gonna read her text message. Seriously, who does that? Does he not understand the word “privacy”?

She comes back, and Hill starts driving her home. He stops in a random place and then starts yelling at her. Telling her he knows her secrets, that she is a spy from their rival competitors. Ro, trying to save herself, admits to it. Hill becomes so angry that he almost hits her.

Let’s rewind and back that up. Almost hits her. At this point in the film I knew it wasn’t him. He just had the sense that he would never hurt a woman. And I found it odd that the only thing he thought Ro was trying to discover about him was spying for another company? It just seemed off to me. I mean if he had killed Grace, Miles message would have made him think that Ro was onto him about that, yet the only thing that comes to mind is a rival company spy? Hmm….

So Ro is fired. Now this is where the story gets weird.

Miles decided to go in and save the day. The next day he pretends to be an IT guy for Hill, ready to do a complete inspection on Hill’s computer. Hill tells him to wait a bit and check out the office. He looks at these photographs done by Mrs. Hill of eyes dilluted with Belladonna.

At this point I’m completely sold on the fact that Mrs. H is the murderer.

Meanwhile, Ro goes to Miles house to make him dinner and discovers that he has some freaky, jacking-off, man-cave, room thing. Really gross and freaky. She also sees that Miles was TruBlue and had been sleeping with Grace.

ew! Gross Yuck

He also channeled Helga from Hey Arnold with a super creepy Ro shrine. Its actually talks and says “Miles is sexy” in Ro’s actual voice. Very sick.

Yeah, pretty freaky!

Miles comes home and Ro starts yelling at him, and accusing him of being the murderer. Miles admits he’s a freak but shows her Hill’s company’s website with the Belladonna pics. He is now absolutely convinced that Hill or his wife killed Grace. Ro still won’t listen and walks out, never wanting to speak to Miles again.

The next day she takes all her info to the police and they set up a sting to catch Hill. Everything pretty much falls apart as the evidence is so high against him. His wife gives some pretty damaging evidence against him. Hill is convicted and sent to jail.

Ro goes back to work and starts writing an article on everything that went on. She has a really great opening:

Ro: It’s a world where you *think* actions have no consequence, where guilt is cloaked by anonymity, where there are no fingerprints. An invisible universe filled with strangers, interconnected online and disconnected in life. It will steal your secrets, corrupt your dreams, and co-opt your identity. Because in this world, where you can be anything you want, any *one* you want, you just might lose sight of who you are.

So here, the movie seems pretty wrapped up, but you just know there has to be one last twist. I’m waiting for the wife to go crazy or be discovered or something.

So then we have this great shot of Mrs. Hill going to the medicine cabinet (where she kept the Belladonna) and opening it. Then we see gloved hands pull out some hair spray, unscew the bottom (like in Jurassic Park) and pull out Belladonna. The person is………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Ro.

Yes Ro. Ro is trying to dump out her secret Belladonna down the drain. Ro then has a flashback and we get the whole story. Her father was going to molest her, when her mom stepped in and beat her dad with the fireplace poker. Instead of calling the cops they buried him in the backyard, and Grace saw the whole thing and has been blackmailing her for years. Watch the video:

Great ending. Only great part of the film.

I especially love how they review the scene between her and Grace. You now get the full meaning of the words that she used when talking to Ro.

The only thing I didn’t like was the moving around of Miles and Ro when he is telling her he had it all figured out. I thought it was just weird. Ugh, and Miles was so gross trying to blackmail her into sleeping with him, yuck!

I love how in the end Hill wasn’t the “perfect stranger”, but they all were. Each character had secrets and things about them they were hiding; in the end being someone completely different than you expected.

So that’s today’s freaky tale. More are on the way.

PerfectStranger

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To go to the beginning of Horrorfest, go to I Don’t Belong in the World

For the previous post, go to Universal’s Classic Monster Movies

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For more on unrequited love, go to Feast Your Eyes On My Accursed Ugliness