We’re in the Future: Good-bye 2015

So you all know what I think of 2015

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I decided that as I started my year with:

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it was only fitting that after I ended my year with Back to the Future as well.

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So in ending 2015, I decided that I’m going to list everything that Back to the Future II (BTTF II) got right about 2015

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Other Fuel

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So while we don’t fly in our cars or through space yet, (Yet I say, yet) there is another method of fuel that has there is another method of fuel besides gas that is gaining popularity, electric cars. Not popular you say? Do you remember when I wrote a post on my car breaking down in San Francisco and we couldn’t find a single parking spot as all were reserved for electric cars? I’m telling you, they are really pushing those things.

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Weather Watch

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While in BTTF II future, we actually control the weather, which of course is not happening now, there are two things that BTTD II was spot on about. First, that we would be able to get weather information instantaneous (which we do on the internet/phones) and that we could actually get that information from our watches.

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Laserdisc Losers

Record not a laserdisc, I know.

Record not a laserdisc, I know.

When Marty and Doc first settle down the alley in the future you can see a bunch of laserdiscs wrapped up and ready to picked up by the trash men. Back in the ’80s, laserdisc weren’t super popular, but still seen as the way of the future. However, BTTF II knew they wouldn’t go far and now most of the people alive today have no clue what they are.

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Self-Lacing Nike Shoes

One of those self-fulling prophecy’s. Nike saw it and decided to make it.

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2015 Fashion

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I was going to make these all separate, but decided it would be easier to put them all together.

*One Size Fits All*

While we don’t have the awesomeness of buying clothes and pulling just one tab to make it fit us perfecctly, BTTF II did get one thing right; the one-size-fits all craze. Now I don’t know how popular this was in the ’80s, but in today’s world it has become a thing.

*Caps Lock*

Now what is it called when you do something before it was cool, in a future before it happened? I don’t know, but that rainbow dipped cap Marty wears in 2015, it is something you see in stores today, that the hipsters would be wearing all over. If you took that and added a triangle or a quote, someone would even use it as their phone’s wallpaper

*Workout Wear as Regular Clothes*

Everywhere you look in this film people are wearing workout wear as they do their regular thing. This was happening in the ’80s, but not by people of all ages like today. Yep, from older men and women; to middle aged mothers, teens, preteens, and kids; wearing workout wear when you have intention of actually working out has become a thing. It is acceptable and BTTF II caught onto it way before we thought it was okay.

*Eye Makeup*

BTTF II really tried to go spacey on their mkeup, but they actually hit the nail on the head. For some reason I am signed up for Teen Vogue, and what they keep perpetuating is crazy makeup.

*Two Tone **

One of Griff’s gang sports a highlighted pompadour, something all the guys are doing these days.

*Studded Out Shoes*

Biff wears them in BTTF II, and today you go anywhere and it is like studzilla. 

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Endless Remakes/Sequels

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While remakes and sequels were happening in the ’80s it was nothing like it is today. I mean look at the Spider-man series; made in the 2000s, remade in 2010s, going to be remade again?

Or what about the Halloween series? There is like 9 already! Or Friday the 13th

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Annoying Ads & Persevering Pop Ups

So as Marty is walking along, everywhere he goes ads appear; Jaws 19, Vote For Mayor, etc. Sound familiar? It seems like today we are being constantly hit by them; going beyond TV and radio, to the internet, youtube, and even Amazon.

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I Love the ’80s

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When Marty steps into the Cafe ’80s he sees a palozza of ’80s love, which has defintely been going on today. Part of it has to do with the fact that 1985 turned 30 this year, but the 2015 has had some serious ’80s love in film; fashion, & more; it is clear we are just as gaga as they thought we would be. Although no Cafe ’80s yet, sadly.

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“You Have To Use Your Hands”

BTTF II called it when they said 2015 would be  world in which you didn’t have to use your hands to play video games. While some still require it, BTTF II dreamed up the Wii and Kinect long before those companies did.

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Hoverboards

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While they aren’t really like the ones in the film, more along the lines of a skateboard, we still technically have them. For me, https://www.youtube.com/embed/vbOWr7y0cT4” target=”_blank”>I’m waiting until we actually levitate.

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News in a Nanosecond

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When Griff & Gang crash into the clock tower, you see a flying computer with the words USA Today on the side that captures the event. Boy was that prophetic! First today most newspapers aren’t run as they used to. They don’t have as many reporters, choosing to pay for the associated press and get their stories that way, outmoding people. Also news is now instantaneous. Things happen, and they are posted on the web, pics and videos. Also computers are the way most get their news, a lot of papers don’t hand out physical copies as much as they used to.

Not to mention that with vlogging and blogging, the news is taking a very different form.

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Books No Longer Paper

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So when Marty purchases the almanac in order to place all those bets, the saeslady mentions “back when books were printed on paper.” Now it is true that in almost every science fiction book or film you read/see, they get rid of paper books, it still is eerily to see them talk about it, knowing that in 2015 books will be available in another format.

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A Delorean? Haven’t Seen One of Those In…

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Sadly the Delorean went out of business in the early ’80s, before this film was made. And because of that, you didn’t see them anywhere. However, in the ’90s the DeLorean company was made to bring it back, but it still is a rare sight.

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Check Out the Telly

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Let’s talk about the TV they show in BTTF II. First did you notice they have large flat screen TVs that you in today’s stores? Yep, back in the day of the bulky square TVs, BTTF II saw a thiner, wider, version coming along the horizon.

They have the ability to watch relaxing scenes of scenery, just like you can today. Think of Netflix’s Christmas log/fireplace.

They also have the ability to watch six different channels/screen at once. Just like Direct TV is always showing in their ads.

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Google Glasses

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At the table eating, you’ll see that both Marty Jr. and Marlene both have glasses that give them the ability to search the web, receive phone calls, and they have to do voice commands. Sound like anything you’ve heard of? Like Google Glasses.

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Phone More Interesting Than People

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When you watch the film you’ll see that as the McFly clan gathers around to eat their rehydrated pizza, the kids are all focused on their google glasses not caring about actually conversing with anyone. The only ones who are talking, are those that were young in the ’50s and ’80s, the older generation. Sound familiar? I see that everyday.

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Skype You Later

While it is true that most future films, books, and TV shows tend to have these kind of communication; BTTF II was spot on when it said we would have the technology to communicate with people face to face when we call. Whether you use Skype, Facetime, Snapchat, etc.; BTTF II knew what was what.

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For me 2015 was a great year as I was finally able to live one of my dreams, see all three Back to the Futures on the big screen. But whether it was all that you wished or not exactly a dream year, I wish you all a happy new year, and may this one be a great new start!

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Back to the Future

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For more on Back to the Future, go to Back to the Supernatural

For more on 2015, go to Where We’re Going, We Don’t Need Roads

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We Are Family

Family

Day 25) Your Family

So a while back I did a post, Considering Lily, about how I was inspired by a book to write my own blog. One thing I learned from that story was that it was best not to write about family and friends, just in case they didn’t like what I had to say. So talk about my actual family…

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So instead I will talk about my other family. My babies. My kitties!!

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I have two adorable kitties, of which I have posts to come on, and they are my babies. They may give me trouble every now and then, like all cats:

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But I just love them!!!!!!!!!!!

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I also have another family, my blogging family. So there is the original:

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All about Jane Austen, Holidays, things that happen in my everyday life, music, etc.

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But that is not the only blog in my family. In fact, I have a younger sister, that is sister blog, called Mysterious Eats.

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This blog reviews mysteries:

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And recipes. The recipes come either from the mystery books, or are just recipes I want to test out. A Mystery! (On both ends)

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And then their is my youngest sister, sister blog, From Print to Screen, who just had its first post. Congrats!

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This post compares the books to their film versions and tells you which they like best.

So if those strike your fancy, check them out!

Take it away Sister Sledge!

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To start the 30 Day Challenge from the beginning, go to Musical Madness

For the previous post, go to One of Many

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For more Lillian Jackson Braun, go to Cat Lovers All Know This

Considering Lily

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9) Something That Has Inspired You

Something that has really inspired me is the book Consider Lily, by Anne Dayton and May Vanderbilt.

The story is of an Californian, Christian girl, Lily Traywick, who is the daughter of true fashionistas and owners of the humongous department store Traywicks. Lily didn’t inherit this fashion gene, as she hardly knows what goes together, and also is bemoaning her lack of ever being on a real date. She starts writing a blog and becomes famous as her pseudonym “Fashion Victim”;  starts a bet with one of her best friends Lily promising to get a makeover and follow everything to the letter, while her friend promises to come to three Sunday services; and sets out to try and win the man of her dreams. Of course nothing is perfect as the guy she originally likes is not her, the fame from her blog gets her a real job writing but her editor turns out to be horrible, the cute Christian boyfriend she lands ends up dumping her, and everything she has ever ranted gets spilled in the San Francisco Chronicle. What’s girl to do?

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Trust in the Lord.

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And everything turns out alright.

Now I have loved this book because the main character is a lot like me. We have had trouble in not having a date either because the guy sees us as too much of a friend:

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Doesn’t want to date us once they find out we are a Christian and plan on waiting for sex along with our other beliefs:

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Or wants the whole marriage and tons of kids thing instantly

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We both had a love of sports, writing, and are fashion-challenged. Although she is worse than me.

We also had a similarity in dating, although her guy turned out alright in the end, while mine was a rotter. But ah that is fiction versus reality.

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I loved the idea of her blogging, and  this book really inspired me to start my own blog and share me thoughts on the internet with others who would be receptive.

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I mean it’s not that my friends or family don’t like listening to me, but if you have been following you know that when I like something, I really like it and love to talk about it. Sometimes making it annoying for those who don’t care about it as much as me, or who really don’t care about it at all.

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So having a blog is a great way of releasing all that, without making those close to me bored.

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This book also taught me that it is probably best to keep the topics away from friends and family, just in case they ever read it or you were exposed. I try to not talk about them, or if I do I have given them all fake names so I can deny it was them I was talking about.

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And it made me kind of want to be a writer too. Too bad I don’t have a friend who can fix me up with a great job like she does in the book. But once again, that’s fiction versus reality.

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But I loved this book, and it inspired me to create this blog, of which I have had a lot of fun these last few years. Thank you Anne & May, as without you’re lovely character Lily, janeaustenrunsmylife.wordpress.com would not exist.

psych thank you

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To start the 30 Day Challenge from the beginning, go to Musical Madness

For the previous post, go to GISHWHES Girl

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For more on May Vanderbilt, go to Fashionably Postworthy

For more bookish posts, go to Going on a Treasure Hunt

Fanning All Over the Place

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Yes, its true.

I am such a fangirl and have so many, many, many fandoms that I belong to. They take over my life! I mean if you think of all the hours that are put into being a massive fan, it’s astounding!

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Here is a list of  things (alphabetically) that constantly take over my life. I’m actually breaking this up into a series of posts, as just one was tooooo much.

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Anne of Green Gables Series

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I love Anne of Green Gables. It is one of my most favorite book series and books turned into films. The book takes place in Canada in the early 20th century. Marilla and Matthew Cuthburt, two elderly people, have decided to take in an orphan boy to help take care of their farm, Green Gables. When Matthew goes to pick the orphan up, he finds a girl instead of a boy! A redhead named Anne. Anne proves to be widely entertaining, spirited, imaginative and a whole lot of fun.

Anne is just so awesome how she is always trying to find a kindred spirit and using her optimism and sweetness in everyday life. She also has an overactive imagination and gets herself into the best scrapes.

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All my friends say that I am just like her, which I have to say is definitely true. While I’m missing the red hair; I most definitely have the same temper, imagination, and tendency to get into accidents/scrapes.

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Yep I totally would have whacked him too!

So the first book Anne of Green Gables, is about her life as she lives on Prince Edward Island. You get introduced to her character along with meeting the rest of the people who live on the island. She studies hard and ends up getting a scholarship to college, but things happen that makes her decide to wait and become a teacher for the present.

In its sequel Anne of Avonlea, it chronicles her time as a teacher on the island, and her desire to become a writer. She continues to get into scrapes, even though she that being older should make her wiser. Her family also takes in twins, Daisy and Davy, to raise.

In Anne of the Island, Anne goes to college and it chronicles her years there. She also gets six proposals.Yes, not one, not two, not even three, but six!

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In the end, she agrees to marry one of her suitors. I won’t tell you who, as you have to read!

Anne of Windy Poplars she can’t get married right away as her fiancé is still in school. She goes to Windy Poplars to teach and has to contend with the politics of the areas, as certain “old families” run the roost.

Anne’s House of Dreams Anne is married and has to deal with the issues of early marriage, running a home, and eventually kids. But that doesn’t stop her from her earlier imaginative games and friendmaking.

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Anne of Ingleside details her married life, spotlights her children, and visits old friends and flames.

Besides the wonderful, imaginative, and fun Anne; you also have one of the best romantic heros ever. Gilbert Blythe.

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Yep, I’m Anne. I know I say stuff like that all the time, but if I had to pick a fictional character I’m really like, it is her. We are the same although I live about a hundred years later than her. (Yeah an exact 100 years, spooky).

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Which means that Gilbert is absolutely perfect for me. Still looking for him. Someday I’ll find him.

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Definitely check out the books and the films. Just an FYI the films move away from the stories, and the first two are the only good ones.

For more on the Anne of Green Gables seriesgo to Part XI: A Movie Lines List’s Excellent Adventure

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Austenite/Janeite

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Do I really need to explain this? I mean look at the title of my blog and half the things I write about. I am a huge Austenite and love everything Jane Austen.

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Jane Austen was an amazing woman who faced all kinds of adversary. She grew up with money, but ended up living in poverty. She fell in love with a high class man, but his family intervened and sent him away. She was given another opportunity to marry a wealthy man that would have saved her and her family from destitution, but  she couldn’t marry him as she didn’t love him.

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She continued to wait for her true love; although he never walked back into her life. Her first book she ever wrote, Northanger Abbey (then called Lady Susan) was published post-mortem. Her second novel and the most famous, Pride and Prejudice, was turned down several times before being published. In fact, it was published after she wrote her third novel, Sense and Sensibility.

Austen wrote not only great stories that have stood the test of time, but wrote about real issues and her more radical thoughts/philosophies, that wouldn’t be as easily accepted if spoken in person.

There is so much more I could say, but that would take several posts to fill it up. I recommend reading On the 10th Day ‘Til Christmas: Merry Christnas from the Austen Novels to read more of my love for Jane Austen’s work and her characters.

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For more on Jane Austen, go to Opening With…

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The Avengers

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Now I may be one of the few that are far more interested  in The Avengers than Magic Mike but I see that as a good thing. The Avengers are another part of the Marvel (now Disney) family. The comic originated in the ’60s, with the team consisting of Iron Man, Ant Man, Wasp, Thor, Hulk, & Captain America. Superheros from all the Marvel comics have joined up as team members through the years, such as Kitty Pryde and Wolverine from the X-Men. Even solo acts like Spider-man, have joined up for a while.

Now the film was amazing. The Avengers is one of the best superhero films to come out.They did an outstanding job as the film gave each superhero its chance to shine and made it about them as a whole, instead of one individual (that’s how it’s done X-Men. Yeah I’m looking at your 2000 series that was really only about Wolverine). Plus you have some extremely hunky guys. There is Chris Evans as Captain America, Robert Downey Jr. as Iron Man, and Mark Ruffalo as the Hulk.

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LOVE IT!! Check it out!

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Back to the Future

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I LOVE Back to the Future. Words cannot describe what this film means to me.

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After the first time I saw this film, I immediately became obsessed with it. I memorized every single line in the films. I would comb through the TV listings, and watch it every, single time it came on. One time I even got up at 4:00 am! That’s commitment right there. And why not be obsessed with it? Duh, it’s AWESOME!

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The film is a combo of Science-fiction, historical fiction, the ’50s, and the ’80s. All things I love and hold dear. Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox), is the youngest of the McFly household and growing up in 1985. He wants to be a musician but is afraid of failing. He’s close friends with amateur scientist and millionare, Dr. Emmet Brown, Doc for short. Doc has finally created the time machine he’s been working on for 30 years. And put it in a Delorean.

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Before he can set out on his trip through time, Doc is killed by the terrorists he bamboozled for uranium. Marty jumps in the car and takes off, accidentally going back to 1955 and messing up his parent’s meetup. If he doesn’t get them back together, he’s history.

What’s not to love? Comedy, romance, science-fiction, great music, clothes, Michael J. Fox? Plus amazing gags!

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This film was a hit and followed by two more films. In Part II Marty goes to 2015 to fix something, but indadvertedly causes his present to be destroyed. When he goes back to 1985, he finds out his father is dead, mom is married to Biff, and the whole town is run by Biff and is a hell hole. He then has to go back to 1955 in order to refix the time stream. But, it won’t be as easy as before, he can’t run into himself or else the whole time-space continuum will be destroyed!

Part III, Marty discovers that the Doc from 1985 has gone back to 1885. He then has to get the 1955 Doc to help him out and send him to 1885. When he gets there, he discovers that Biff’s however many grand pappy, “Mad Dog” Tanner, is planning on killing Doc.

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They not only have to figure a way to get back without any modern convinces, but to make the issue even harder…Doc falls in love with a 1885 woman. Will they survive the Old West? Will Marty ever get back to 1985? Watch to find out!

Great mix of the ’80s & Western film

I visited Universal Studios in 2012 and was devastated to see that they had hardly anything from Back to the Future. The clock tower was destroyed in that big fire, the ride had been taken out for “newer” things, and you couldn’t find any cool souvenirs. When I went in 2013, things were different. Universal Studios has a studio museum that they constantly move props in and out and they had a whole Back to the Future collection. I was having a ball, in fact I wanted to climb over the plexiglass and sit in the Deloran.

Here are the clock tower building plans

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And the beautiful car

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For more on Back to the Future, go to Just a Friendly Reminderhearts banner

Batman

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So I love Batman. He will always be my favorite of the DC comics. And I like all the Batmans!

So here we have a man who’s parent’s die and cause him to become a vigilante; always hoping to finally destroy crime as that was the thing that killed his parents. He is a billionaire, but other than that a normal person. I mean, unlike Superman who has a gazillion powers, Batman relies on his mind, martial arts, and inventions.

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He also has his strain of the double life. Just like Sir Percy Blakeney aka The Scarlet Pimpernel, Don Diego de la Vega aka Zorro, and Francisco Domingo Carlos Andres Sebastián d’Anconia from Atlas Shrugged. Batman knows that this charade of a playboy not only hides his intelligence, but the fact that he is be a main piece in destroying the crime. It has to be hard to be thought of and treated “as the richest man and the most spectacularly worthless playboy on Earth” (pg. 56, Atlas Shrugged). But Batman knows that it is a must to continue his work.

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So there are many versions of Batman and I pretty much love them all.

So besides the comic books you have Batman (1966 – 1968), starring Adam West. This is a hilarious show as it just makes you giggle. It’s fantastically corny.

Then you have Batman (1989) starring the handsome and wonderful Michael Keaton. In this we have Batman taken to the big screen in a darker way, with none other than the Creeper McCreepy Creep Jack Nicholson as the Joker. He is one of the best as his uber creepiness in real life was magnified on the screen. A great film, you should check out.

In Batman Returns, Michael Keaton is back and facing up against Christopher Walken, the Penguin, and Catwoman. I never really liked the penguin’s part in this film, but Michelle Pfeiffer is the best Catwoman ever. Halle Berry and Anne Hathaway wish they could be as awesome as her. Definitely worth seeing for her and Michael Keaton.

Batman Forever totally sucked. Val Klimer is too stiff and monotone as Batman, Nicole Kidman the therapist is a sex-crazed woman who needs to help solve her own issues before getting into others, and Tommy Lee Jones as Two-Face is just…no wrong. Wrong. The only bright spot is Jim Carrey as the Riddler. He was absolutely perfect, and the only reason I watch this film.

That’s probably how most of us fans would act when we meet out idol.

Batman and Robin is…its a mess. I know it. It is full of puns, lots of stuff makes zero sense, but I LOVE IT! I can’t explain it. I find it absolutely hilarious. I love Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze. Its more of a parody, and I love it.

Besides that you have a some great cartoon series that came out. Such as Batman: The Animated Series. This has to be one of the best versions of Batman ever made. It really develops into the psyche and relationships of Bruce, Dick, Barbara, Comissioner Gordon, etc. Plus you have great villans like the Joker, Poison Ivy, Harley Quinn, etc. It is definitely worth a watch, and it is free on Amazon Instant Watch. I have my own favorite episodes, but Nostalgia Critic really hits on the best ones in the series (although I would add Harley & Ivy episode to that list).

Then we have Batman Beyond. In this they took the story to a different level. It was very dark and used the colors black and red only. It takes place in 2039, and Bruce is all alone. All his old friends have died or left him alone. Terry McGinnis gets involved with Bruce accidentally, and eventually Bruce trains him to become the new Batman and avenger of Gotham City.

Intense!

And then we have the new Batman films. Now I really liked Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. I didn’t like The Dark Knight Rises however, but I’m like the only one. I just couldn’t get into it and hate how they chose to end with Bane after the Joker. Come on now, seriously. But I thought the first film was great. The only issue I had with the second film was that they didn’t give Two-Face enough screentime, and that he didn’t argue with himself as much as he should have. He didn’t have the same rooted issues. But all in all they were really good.

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And I’m super pumped for Batman vs. Superman. Bring on the bat!

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For more on Batman, go to That Girl is Poison

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Bones

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I love Bones because of one reason really, FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth played by David Boreanaz.

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He is AMAZING!

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Bones is about forensic anthropologist Dr. Temperance “Bones” Brennan (Emily Deschanel) who gets hired by the FBI as a consultant to help them solve cases. There is also an amazing secondary cast: wild, artistic, Angela Montenegro who does facial reconstruction; Dr. Jack Hodgins, an entomologist who spurned his family’s wealth and “buisness” to study science; Dr. Zack Addy, genius graduate student who is unfamilar with “social norms”; and Dr. Lance Sweets, the young, handsome, FBI psychologist who helps them out.  It is a great show, that I highly recommend.

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Ah, the life of a fangirl

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Stay tuned for Part 2!

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For more on my fangirlness, go to How I Differ from Others

For more of my favorite quotes, go to Peeta Please!

That Girl is Poison

So if you have been following me for a while, you are quite aware of the fact that I am a huge Batman fan. For any superhero fan you have got to have a favorite villain. And mine is Poison Ivy.

poisonivy DC comics

I’ve always loved how she is this super stong feminist, girl-power; yet at the same time isn’t above using seduction and feminine wiles to get what she wants. Plus, I don’t know, she always seemed so cool. So back in April my friends and I were discussing Halloween costume ideas and that’s when I decided I was going to be Poison Ivy.

Go here to see who you are.

Go here to see who you are.

But then I ran into a few problems with the putting of the costume together. You see her original outfit is like a green sweetheart leotard, tights, and boots. Not a lot there and October is cold. I wasn’t going to do a leotard and tights. That’s crazy!

No thank you

So I decided to reimagine her outfit. Instead of the tights and leotard I decided a corset top, shrug with a high villaness collar, green leggings, and my yellow 5 inch platform shoes.

hot pretty sexy

But things didn’t quite turn out as I planned.

nightmare before christmas nothing turn out like it should

The corset and shrug looked awesome, it was the leggings that ran into some issues. You see I have a large butt.

curvy

And I do like it, but it can cause some problems. One of which being that leggings don’t always cover its ampleness like they should.

Stupid, stupid

So then we had to change plans. I was going to go with a skirt and tights, although it wasn’t what I really wanted. I wanted pants because if I was an evil villian that is what I would wear. I would want to be able to kick somebody. Luckily my sister heard of my dilemma and told me she could make me some pants.

Double double yay

Everything was going according to plan. The only thing left to do was my hair. And we know how that usually goes.

Hair humidity lion king

But it went better than I thought it would. You see I had thought about using a wig, but they are so itchy I decided to dye it instead (temporarily). I went to the beauty store and was warned my hair was too dark of a color the red wouldn’t show. I told the workers I understood that, but I didn’t want bright Ariel hair, I was hoping for a more auburn-y color.

Game of thrones jon Snow kit harrington I know how

So I ask my sister to help me as she has died her hair multiple times. She went to work and the results were…well let me start that by saying my hair is unusual.

DisneyJHair

Yeah, it doesn’t do what most people’s hair does. Even my hairdresser has remarked on this. When you want it to be wet, it dries instantly. When you want it dry, it is resistant to the hairdryer. When you want it parted on one side, it flips to the other. When you want it pushed back, it wants to go forward.

hair no control

So she was trying to slick my hair back to put the dye in, but it kept going forward. Luckily, I had read online that when you dye your hair you should put vaseline along the hairline to protect the dye from staining your skin. It was a good thing I had read that, or else I would have come out looking weird.

Queen of outer space

When my sister was done putting the dye in. She showed me her gloves and it looked like we had just murdered someone, the way the dye had gotten everywhere. It was like a Dexter episode.

large_Dexter_Morgan_Bloody_Hand__93640

Ayways, after I sat the most time allowed, we washed my hair. Sadly it looked like all the dye was running out into the tub and that my hair was the same color.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

But I figured, oh well. If nothing happens, then at least I have a great story to blog.

Yeah-Dean-dean-winchester-33251540-500-300

Well, I was wrong. Not all  the die did wash out. It still looked red!

hair dying

I really liked how it came out. You see my hair is a golden brown with blond and copper natural highlights. The whole mane ranges in lights and darks. The dye came out really cool, witth some areas being a really dark brown, auburn, red. While others were much, much brighter. I actually really like it and am considering dying it permenantly. I could totally pull it off as I have the two thinngs needed to be a sucessful redhead. 1) I have light eyes-green. 2) I do not tan at all, but remain white year round. The only issue I face is money!

So here’s the pic of my costume and hair. My sis and friend went as Catwoman and Harley Quinn, making us the three tantilizing women of Gotham.

PoisonIvyHalloweenDC costumes copslay

Yep you should join the dark side.

Star Wars Dark side power Darth vader

heading-banner11970857801243195263Andy_heading_flourish.svg.hi

For more on Batman, go to I’m Batman!

For more strong, independent women; go to How to Catch a  Man

For more quizzes, go to You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Boat

For more on Star Wars, go to Part IX: Adventures in Movie Lines

Don’t F*** With the Original: Scre4m (2011)

Scream-4-Intl-3

You forgot the first rule of remakes, Jill. Don’t f*** with the original!

If only Wes had followed his own advice.

2013-11-27-bradpittUgh

I wish they hadn’t messed with the original. This movie sucked.

Bad Sequels psycho-1960-alfred-hitchcock-janet-leigh-pic-21

Just plain horrible. You see this all happened because everyone wanted to make another film after Scream 3. Wes told them he wouldn’t, unless the script was as good as the original film. Unfortunately, those dunderheads thought that meant they needed to do a horrible remake of the first amazing film.

hmm_yes_i_see_youre_a_moron_trollcat

For those of you just tuning in, this is the last of our Screamtastic Saturdays. Every Saturday this month I reviewed one of the Scream films. To read about them before you start this one, go to Scream, Scream 2, Scream 3

Now as you can tell I didn’t enjoy this one. As I watched this film I took a lot of notes on my feelings, A LOT. I’m just going to write them verbatim.

So let’s get started on this travesty…

I don't wanna

I don’t wanna

So the film starts out with two girls (Lucy Hale and Shenae Grimes) hanging out discussing horror films and stuff. One of them has a facebook stalker. It turns out to be ghostface who stabs and kills them both.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

1&2

Victims 1&2

But wait…

Psych!Gameofthrones

It turns out that its not real. It is the opening scene from the film Stab 6 that two girls are watching. (Anna Paquin and Kristen Bell).

So that’s the first problem of this film. It was so dripped in big name actors that it was impossible to get into. I mean the original had famous actors too, but this was tooooo jam packed. It’s too much, far too much.

Darcy P&P OMG Can't Even

So Anna Paquin talks too much during the movie that Kristen Bell kills her.

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

I know Kristen Bell? Whatever.

3

Body #3

Just kidding

Psych!GameofthronesSyke

Yep, it’s just another fakeout. It’s Stab 7  that Julie from Friday Night Lights, I mean Jenny (Aimee Teagarden) and her friend Marnie are watching. After that Jenny goes upstairs to get something, and instead prank calls her friend. The “real” Ghostface comes in and kills Marnie, with Jenny right behind her.

Victim 4 & 5

Victim 4 & 5

And here we have another garage scene that is improbable. I’m telling you, any automatic garage door will not be able to kill someone. They design the mechanisms so that if there is something underneath them, it will cause them to be incapable of being squished.

Duh!

Duh!

And the other problem with this scene is the fact that having two fakeouts was too many. After the two psych-outs, I was not attached to the characters as I was just expecting them to die. It wasn’t scary, mysterious, funny, or good. It was just bad. Bad, bad, bad. Plain ol’ lazy writing. Come on Wes, you’re better than this. This is reverting back not evolving.

Bones David Bored I;m bored boring

So this film, and the first scene, take place 10 years after “The Woodsboro Massacre” or the amazing phenomenon known as Scream. Deputy Dewey is now Sheriff and married to Gale Weathers. Gale has stopped reporting and turned to writing fiction. Sidney has written a book on her experiences and is on tour. In fact, she has just arrived in Woodsboro. And Randy is dead.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Still not over that.

We then see the horrible Emma Roberts getting picked up for school. I hate Emma Roberts. She has no talent whatsoever. She always seems as if she is acting, so I never believe that she is whatever “character” she is playing. She’s like a block of wood. I think she is secretly a robot as she never gives any emotion. None whatsoever. She’s proof that just because one family member has talent, doesn’t mean the rest do.

big mistake

I bet she is the killer. She’s all I hate Sidney.  Blah, blah blah…

boohoo_zps058c9fe1

Anyways, Jill (Emma Roberts) is being picked up by her friends Kirby (Hayden Panettiere) and Olivia (Marielle Jaffe). Now who are these girls trying to fool? There is no way these girls are in high school they look sooo OLD.

I mean Roberts could pass for 19 at the youngest, but Panettiere and Jaffe? They are clearly are late 20s heading for their thirties. I’m looking it up now…let’s see…Roberts was 20 at the time, Panettiere was 22, and Jaffee was also 22. Okay so they weren’t as old as I thought they were, although they look it. I mean it’s laughable how they think they could pass off people so old as high school students.

Jill and Olivia receive texts from Jenny and Marnie, even though they aren’t close friends or anything…and the two girls are dead (although no one has discovers it yet. Speaking of which where were the parents during all of this? Why weren’t they with their kid? How come it took someone so long to discover the body? Come on now!)

Wes also has a love affair in this film with fake jumps. It’s like every five seconds. Seriously, just stop.

Stop stop it now!

At the station Sheriff Dewey gets called on the scene and I notice something here Wes. Yes…yes…it appears that Dewey no longer suffers from a limp. I see, I see. Dewey  gets to be limp free WHILE RANDY IS DEAD??!!

800__shadow_of_a_doubt_blu-ray_04_intense stare angry upset mad creep

Never letting that one go. Moving on.

So Sheriff Dewey is called on the scene and he knows, he just knows

RIP Randy! Love you forever!!!!!!!

RIP Randy! Love you forever!!!!!!!

So as Sheriff Dewey is looking around, one of his deputies calls him Sheriff Riley. And I was like Whaaaaaaat????? Dewey has a last name?

phil first name agent Avengers phil coulson tony stark pepper potts

Sorry. Back to the film.

So then we zoom to the high school were we have Hollywood’s version of high school students. You know horribly unrealistic and clichéd to the farthest ranges of the imagination. Because in Hollywood:

thats-how-its-done

Yep, enter super nerd who has a computer hooked up to his headphones so he can blog every moment of his life.

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

Really Wes? Have you been to a school and seen real nerds? They don’t dress like that or do that? I mean when Ned’s Declassified did the Nerd has camera/computer hooked up to their glasses they did it to spoof. They weren’t trying to portray the nerd/online/blogger culture. You fail. Big time.

Duh!

Duh!

So then we enter douche boy, Jill’s ex-boyfriend. I mean this is some serious deja vu as he ex is a total creep. I guess douche dating runs in the family.

Girl Please

So during homeroom, everyone’s cellphones buzz with the news. I’m just like, why wasn’t the school notified? When I was in high school we had two deaths. One was a car crash, the other an overdose and the teachers were all immediatey notified before the friends even found out. Same thing in college when a guy committed suicide, and another guy jumped off his balconey as he was high and had a bad trip. Although in college they sent emails and texts to the students, while in high school they told us.

At the bookstore, Sidney is reading an excerpt from her book when Sheriff Dewey comes marching in. He interrupts the signing as they are tracking the phone that placed the calls. They discover it in the back of Sidney’s rental, along with bloody handprints.

dun-dun-duuuun

Back at the station, Sheriff Dewey s dealing with a lot. Gale comes down as her old investigative spirit is still alive. She encounters a huge prob though. Dewey’s deputy, Deputy Judy, has a mondo crush on Dewey. But Gale, she’s not having any of that.

that girl is going after my man she is going to wish she was never born

I love that Gale is still kickin’ butt.

verbalbeatdown

So Sheriff Dewey decides to put Sidney on 24-hour police protection, and all I can think is do you remember what happend last time? Yeah, it did not end well.

ouch Hermione

You know what almost everyone in this film has drunk the kool-aid. I know that Wes wanted to provide a wide range of “suspects” (totally obvious Jill and Culkin brother/crazy film nerd guy). But he makes everyone seem CRAZY!!! Jill’s ex, the deputy, and that’s not all. Let’s add Sidney’s publicist who delights in the murders because it will sell more books. She actually hopes more will occur. And then we have Sidney’s aunt Kate. “Nobody cares about the fact that it was MY sister that was killed or what I’VE been going through.

Gilmore girls creep

So at this point in the film I’m starting to wonder what happened to Patrick Dempsey? AKA Detective Mark Kincaid. I guess he was too busy being a doctor or maid of honor. Let’s see…Yes to doctor, no to maid of honor. He was trying to protect a bank teller and working with Decepticons. I wish they had given us a clue as why they didn’t stay together. I liked Mark.

Later that evening, Sidney goes to talk to Jill and you know what..how come we have never heard of this aunt and niece before? I mean they have lived in the town their whole life and not once was concerned with Sidney? Like why didn’t she stay with her aunt when he dad was out of town? This Wes, is why you do not try and remake a good thing. Just leave well enough alone.

So Sidney goes in to talk to Jill and sees her creep ex climbing in her window trying to talk to her. He’s extra creepy and weird calling himself “the ninja”. Who nicknames themselves? He is also a total control freak and won’t listen to “no”. What a jerk.

jerk

That night Kirby comes over and she and Jill are watching scary movies. Kirby gets a call from Ghostface that he’s hiding in the closet. She decides to be stupid and looks around, finding no one. Like this guy KILLED people. Maybe you should CALL THE POLICE!!!!

Scream 2

The voice says that he never stated which closet he was in.

Now the house next door is Olivia’s who is home alone (of course). The police offered to walk her to her home but she refused and like the stupid caricatures they are, they agreed. I just realized that policeman in the Scream  films are pretty stupid. Dewey and Mark being the exception. I mean SHE RECIEVED A DEATH THREAT FROM GHOSTFACE EARLIER!!!! WHY IS NO ONE PROTECTING HER!!! So of course, Ghostface is in her closet and kills her.

Victim 6

Victim 6

And her friends just watch.

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

Seriously, they DO NOTHING BUT WATCH THEIR FRIEND GET SLICED APART. Scream! Call the police!!! Do something!!!!

Sid hears it and rushes over to help. Now Sid I love you, but couldn’t you have brought a weapon with you? How do you expect to save the girl if you have nothing. I mean come on, grab a bat, frying pan, knife, SOMETHING!!!

Sid does manage to take him down as she rules! But when the cops come he’s disappeared? Who is he Michael Myers? How does he move so fast? I mean they did the same thing in Scream 2.

Why weren’t the cops able to find him? WHY DOES EVERYONE SUCK??? THIS MOVIE IS HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE I TELL YOU!!! CRAVEN YOU HAVE DISAPPOINTED ME AGAIN! IT’S LIKE NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET ALL FREAKIN’ OVER AGAIN!!!

800__shadow_of_a_doubt_blu-ray_04_intense stare angry upset mad creep

Not happy, not happy at all

Gale seduces the two nerds to get them to help her. At first I thought it was funny, but the more I think about it, it’s creepy. I know on Cougar Town you are always with younger men, but this is a 47 year old woman hitting on 17 year olds.

ew! Gross Yuck

PR girl is the devil. I am sorry but the way she gushes about the killings, she needs help.

you're evil

So after she leaves from visiting Sidney in the hospital (minor cut) she runs into Ghostface and is killed.

Victim #7

Victim #7

Now to be honest its her own fault as she really shouldn’t be walking around at night by herself with a killer on the loose. And what’s really stupid was that she was by her car. Just get in and drive away, run him over. Instead she tries to run. DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB. I mean come on, you were sitting inside the car! Why would you ever take off?

Girl Please

You know what I just realized. so far the killer has only murdered women. What’s up with that? In the other films it was always equal. How come you’re just killing women Wes? Huh? Why? You know what else? In every film we have couples who are murdered first. Scream– Steve and Casey, Scream 2– Boyfriend and Jada Pinket-Smith, & Scream 3– Cotton’s girlfriend and Cotton. But in this one its only been girls. There’s a formula!

But now, we only have females murdered. What happened Wes, did you have a woman break your heart so now you are releasing your anger on females?

And you know what’s really depressing about this film is that it lost everything. It isn’t a horror parody and a horror film at the same time; It’s just sad and boring. You can tell from the beginning who the killers are (Jill & Charlie [Culkin brother super nerd]). It’s just a recycled plot. A poorly recycled one too.

Bones David Bored I;m bored boring

I mean each previous Scream brought something new and fresh.

Scream

  1. Parody of the Horror film Genre while still being a great horror film
  2. Twist ending with two killers, and one being the boyfriend.
  3. Obsession with horror films and trying to create their own
  4. Revenge because his mother left.

Scream 2

  1. Parody of sequel films and horror sequels
  2. Debates issue if whether horror films turn people into killers
  3. Twist ending where you think it is the boyfriend murdering, but really ex’s mom
  4. Female serial killer

Scream 3

  1. Parody of trilogy films
  2. Twist ending with mother’s secret early life + half brother
  3. Single killer this time
  4. All the survivors end in a couple-Dewey & Gale, Mark & Sid

Scre4m

  1. Recycled plot
  2. Pop culture of the day inserted but it feels more like an old man trying to be “hip” and failing than avant-garde.
  3. They waited far too long to make this film. It should have come sooner.

So the next day Gale gets Sidney to come speak at the film club at the high school. In return for this, the two geek boys Charlie (the Culkin brother) and his friend blogger- headphones, Robbie, will help her out. Gale thinks the new Ghostface is copying the murders, but the nerd twins point out that it is a remake “as only remakes are being made these days.” Tru dat. In 2011 alone there was Silent House, Gnomeo & Juliet, The Green Hornet, The Roommate, The Mechanic, Just Go With It, Unknown, Jane Eyre, Winnie the Pooh, Arthur, X-Men: First Class, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, Fright Night, Conan the Barbarian, Real Steel, Straw Dogs, The Thing, Footloose, The Muppets, and The Sitter.

The kids tell Gale & Sidney that if the killer wants to make it intense and new he is going to record the murders. That’s not new, it’s been happening for quite so time now. Just another ripoff.

They decide the next place he will strike is the annual Stab-a-thon. Now you have a killer running about and you refuse to stop your party? Definteky Charlie. He’s the killer. I mean come on, any smart person would be like nope, let’s stop this so people don’t die.

jerk_alert32

So a bunch of the kids dress up in Ghostface masks which is incredibly stupid. I mean you have a KILLER IN THE GHOSTFACE MASK? Why is everyone so STUPID.

Ugh

Ugh

Gale goes there just like in the first film and hooks up some “secret cameras”. The cameras get covered up and Gale calls Dewey before she goes into take care of them. Now the smart thing would be to just wait as it is obvious that Ghostface is the one doing it, but whatever! I mean like even if you feel like you HAVE  to go, why not be extra cautious and take a weapon! I mean, come on now people. She goes and is stabbed by the killer, however, she’s Gale so she just has to go to hospital. That’s cause Gale is awesome.

I just want this film to be over. It is that painful.

So I am liking nobody in this film. Like every character is crazy or stupid. The only exceptions are Gale, Sid, Dewey, and Aimee Teagarden’s character as she tried to run away. Even though I think Emma Roberts is the killer I want her to get stabbed so I won’t have to see her face again this film and hear her horrible acting voice.

Duh!

Duh!

So back at the house Sidney sees something outside. She goes to take a look at it instead of CALLING THE POLICE! Come on Sid, you’re better than that.

Stop stop it now!

So the cops outside Kate/Jill/Sid’s residence are all comedic and talking about movie cops. They say that cops are what you never want to be as they are always “getting it” in films. Uh, not true! What about Dirty Harry? Ain’t nobody taking down Clint Eastwood. Or what about Patrick Dempsey in Scream 3, I mean Wes you freakin’ made that film. Witness? Harrison Ford always dominates! Sidney Poitier In the Heat of the Night or They Call Me, Mr. Tibbs! Mark Wahlberg in The Departed? Die Hard?

Besides why would the black cop be worried that since he is a cop he’s going to killed? He’s got bigger worries, he’s a minority. He’s going to get killed for that. The only horror films I’ve ever seen where the minority doesn’t get killed first and makes it to the end would be Night of the Living Dead and Aliens vs. Predator.

They both get killed.

Victim #8 & 9

Victim #8 & 9

I was actually happy about that as they were annoying.

So someone in this film finally wises up, as Sid grabs a knife to protect her. Ghostface comes and attacks. Yawn! Knew it was going to happen. There is NOTHING original in this film, NOTHING!!!! Wes you have failed, fAILED FAILED FAILED!!!!!!!!!!!

So Kate also gets killed, she was stabbed through a door.

Victim #10

Victim #10

Yawn! Wes you already did that in Scream 2.

STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!

Is it over yet? Is the film done yet? Boo. There’s still 30 mins left! UGH, UGH, BLEH! I would stop watching like a did with An American Werewolf in London, but I promised full reviews of every Scream film and I can’t go back on that.

So Sidney escapes. She starts to head next door to protect Jill.

Next door we have Jill, Kirby, Robbie, & Charlie watching horror films.

So why don’t any of these kids feel remorse for the murdered people? I mean in Scream the main characters weren’t close to Steve and Casey (except Stu) so I could see where it didn’t make the biggest impact. But Sid started feeling when it was Tatum, Dewey, Gale, etc. In Scream 2, the girl in the film class was sad about her friend that was murdered in the movie theater and everyone is heartbroken over Randy.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Then in Scream 3 Cotton’s death, and while the characters didn’t know the movie stars, they were still sad to see them killed. I mean Olivia was their friend as she was MURDERED!!! And you know how they react? Jill in her monotone voice is fine and doesn’t say anything. Kirby goes to the Stab-a-thon in sa freakin’ ghostface mask. A GHOSTFACE MASK! I mean your friend was MURDERED, MUREDERED! And you are wearing the thing that killer wore to murder to your friend. Something is wrong with you all.

Darcy P&P OMG Can't Even

 And you know what, that is the problem with this film. In the other versions you believed the actors were the characters. You believed them. In this film every character except for the 3 survivors are so fake. They have any real emotions. They don’t have any real reactions. They are like robots or something.

metropolis-Robot

Why is everyone dumb in this movie? This movie is horrible and stupid! Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb! OMG! it’s LIKE HE WANTS TO MAKE A SUCKY VERSION OF AN AMAZING FILM! WHY WOULD HE DO THAT? WHY? WHY? WHO GAVE HIM THE MONEY. You all should be held accountable for this!!!!

Is this too crazy?

Is this too crazy?

This is film is a HUGE DISAPPOINTMENT! BIG MISTAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

big mistake

So the group is hanging out. Trevor comes over as he says Jill invited him. She tells them that is impossible as her phone has been missing. Jill goes upstairs and Trevor follows her. While he is gone, Robbie gets drunk and heads outside for another blog post. When he does this we have the only real scare in the film. He runs into a plant. That’s it folks, so far the plant has been the most scariest and original thing in this travesty. And that’s not even that original.

Back inside, Kirby is trying to seduce Charlie in the most horrible and painful way. It hurt to watch this scene. It was awkward, it was stupid, and it would never happen that way in real life.

ouch Hermione

You know what I’m wondering now? Where are the parents? Come on now, is Jill the only one in town with a parent? They are completely absent! At least in Scream they explaned it. Casey’s parents were out having dinner. Mr. Prescott was going out of town. Mrs. Riley (Dewey & Tatum’s mom) is a single parent. Stu’s parents don’t care and are out of town all the time. Mr. Loomis works late hours and has recently become a single parent. I get that, although they should have done a better job. Scream 2, in college parents aren’t there., although I’m really surprised not one of them came down to check on their kids. Scream 3 all are adults. But these kids have no parents anywhere, nor do they give an explanation except for Olivia She mentions that her mom works late. Its like this whole film is in an alternate dimension where reality plays no part at all. I mean I know its a movie, but explain! Movie EXPLAIN!!!

So this film is far too predictable. You know Robbie who is hanging outside is going to be killed first, then Kirby, then Trevor, and then Charlie. It is soooo obvious.

This is horrible. Why am I watching this? Why?

So Robbie of course is killed, and too his shock as he thinks being gay will save him. I thought that was a weird thing to say. I mean, I can’t think of horror films where a gay person always survive. I mean technically he’s in the minority category and we all know that minorities hardly ever make it to the end of a horror film.

Victim #11

Victim #11

Before Kirby and Charlie could get it on, Trevor comes downstairs. He couldn’t find Jill upstairs. He and  Charlie head to the kitchen, leaving Kirby alone in the living room. Jill comes from downstairs, now how the heck was she there? (I mean obvs to me she’s the killer, but why doesn’t anyone else think that weird?) Sidney runs into the house to warn everyone. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE IF YOU HAD CALLED THE POLICE FOR BACKUP. Kirby goes down to the basement, while Jill and Sidney go upstairs. Jill hides under the bed.

I don't think so

That is the worse place to hide. Beds and  closets are always checked first.

Sidney comes down to the basement with Kirby and they see Charlie. He wants them to let him in, but Kirby is unsure whether or not she can trust him. Ghostface grabs him and ties him to a chair. Ghostface then calls Kirby.

scary movie mansfield park Scream

The two are going to play a game. Kirby wins, Charlie is free.

The Voice: I hear you like horror movies, Kirby. But do you like them as much as him? Forget watching Stab, instead you get to live it.

Kirby Reed: No. No, no, no, no. He’s the expert. It’s not me.

The Voice: Warm up question: Jason’s weapon?

Kirby Reed: Uh,it’s a machete.

The Voice: There. You see? You do know the genre. Michael Myers?

Kirby Reed: Uh, butcher knife.

The Voice: Leatherface?

Kirby Reed: [crying] Chainsaw! Please!

The Voice: Just ask Sidney if you need some help. Freddy Krueger?

Kirby Reed: Razor-hands.

The Voice: Name the movie that started the slasher craze: Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Last House on the Left or Psycho?

Kirby Reed: Psycho.

The Voice: None of the above! Peeping Tom, 1960, directed by Michael Powell. First movie to ever put the audience in the killer’s POV.

Kirby Reed: Wait. No, no, no. Please, just ask me one more question. Just one more.

The Voice: Alright, Kirby, then it’s time for your last chance. Name the remake of the groundbreaking horror movie in which the vill…

Kirby Reed: Halloween, uh, Texas Chainsaw, Dawn of the Dead, The Hills Have Eyes, Amityville Horror, uh, Last House on the Left, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare On Elm Street, My Bloody Valentine, When A Stranger Calls, Prom Night, Black Christmas, House of Wax, The Fog, Piranha. It’s one of those, right? Right?

[silence]

Kirby Reed: I got it right. I was fucking right. [goes outside; unties Charlie] Don’t worry, Charlie. I f****** won. I won. He tried to beat me but I f****** won.

Charlie Walker:[holding knife] Kirby? This is is making a move! [stabs her] Four years of class together and you notice me now? You stupid b****! It’s too late! Shhh, I know. It doesn’t happen as fast as it does in the movies, I know.

[finishes stabbing her and drops her; runs away]

Yep Kirby is dead.

Victim #12

Victim #12

And Charlie was the killer. Totally obvious.

Duh!

Duh!

So deputy Judy comes into play as she discovers Kate’s body and the dead cops. She heads over to Kirby’s house to check on everyone. I still want to punch her crazy-obsessed with Dewey face.

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Does that make me a bad person?

So Sidney is being chased by Charlie and manages to escape him heading for the door. But Sid, don’t forget, except for Scream 3 there are always two killers. And as she heads for the door…boom Jill stabs her.

Now if Wes wanted to make this really unique. He should have down a group of female killers. It is rare, but does happen. Olivia, Kirby, and Jill. Or deputy Judy. She could be doing all these murders just so she could kill Gale and get Sheriff Dewey. Or he could have not tried making a remake. That would have been fantastic!.

So the two totally obvious killers start revealing the reasoning behind it. Jill was always jealous of her cousin’s fame. And as Emma Roberts…I mean Jill has no talent, she figures this is the quickest way to make her famous.

Jill Roberts: My friends? What world are you living in? I don’t need friends. I need fans. Don’t you get it? This has never been about killing you? It’s about becoming you. I mean, for f***’s sake, my own mother had to die, no great loss there, so I could stay true to the original. That’s sick, right? Well, sick is the new sane. You had your 15 minutes, now I want mine! I mean, what am I supposed to do? Go to college? Grad school? Work? Look around. We all live in public now, we’re all on the Internet. How do you think people become famous any more? You don’t have to achieve anything. You just gotta have f***** up-s*** happen to you. So you have to die, Sid. Those are the rules. New movie, new franchise. There’s only room for one lead, and let’s face it, your ingenue days, they’re over.

Charlie was her new boyfriend that was helping her do this. They plan to have Trevor take the fall for it, stabbing themselves, but shooting him to make it look like “self-defense”. Charlie is happy that the “geek will get the girl”, but Jill tells him sorry and kills him.

Victim #13

Victim #13

You know what I just realized. They never clean the knife. Ever. With all those kids having sex and the amount of diseases that abound, now all I can think is how they’ve been spreading so much to people. They’ve all probably got Chlamydia or something.

Also WHERE ARE THE POLICE!!!??? I mean deputy Judy was right next door!!!

So then Jill kills Trevor and Sidney.

Victim #14 &15

Victim #14 &15

After that she starts taking care of the evidence. Planting the knife/gun. Beating /mutilating herself. Even ripping hair out and putting it in Trevor’s hand.

When the police finally come, they discover her and name her the sole survivor. They cart her off to the hospital. In the hospital Dewey visit Jill, who is all smiles. I have to say nobody is freaked out by the fact she doesn’t care that her best friends, mother, and cousin have all been brutally murdered???!!! Someone ship her off to the psycho ward. That girl is crazy!

Certified Creepo Ribbon

Jill tells Dewey that maybe she and Gale can write about the murders as they have matching wounds. Dewey tells her that Sidney might be able to also help, as she is going to recover.

Say What

Yep, looks like we have Dial “M” for Murder all over again.

“Margot Mary Wendice: Do you really believe in the perfect murder?

Mark Halliday: Mmm, yes, absolutely. On paper, that is. And I think I could, uh, plan one better than most people; but I doubt if I could carry it out.

Tony Wendice: Oh? Why not?

Mark Halliday: Well, because in stories things usually turn out the way the author wants them to; and in real life they don’t… always.”

You can’t plan everything sweetheart.

So Jill gets out of her bed and charges down to ICU to get to Sidney.

I don't think so

That is impossible. There is no way she would be able to get across the hospital as they are jam packed with people. Especially ICU. Most ICU units actually are protected by some kind of card swipe or button so that only certain people can go in. There’s no way she’d be able to get to Sidney.

Girl Please

Dewey goes to see Gale, and as he mentions Jill’s comments they both realize that the information about her stabs were not released to the public. There is no way she could have known where Gale was stabbed, unless she had done it herself.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

Dewey runs down to get to Sidney, and sees Jill trying to kill her. Sidney is doing a great job as she is Awesome!  Sid you rule! Jill does have an upper hand as she tries to hurt Sidney in her stab wounds. Dewey is trying to help, but gets knocked out by a bedpan. Gale and Deputy Judy also come in, but Jill stole Dewey’s gun and threatens killing Dewey to get Deputy Judy’s gun. After the gun is passed, she shoots Deputy Judy in the chest.

Victim #13

Victim #15

Jill is threatening all and planning on killing them but this is very stupid. She already framed Trevor and gave a statement. How is she going to explain the other dead bodies? Who can she pin the murder of Sidney, Gale, Deputy Judy, and Sheriff Dewey on. Not going to work.

Jill plans in killing Gale next, as Sidney’s wounds have reopened and she seems to be the lesser threat. She is about to when Sidney shocks her with the defibrillator.

Jill tries one last time, but Sid shoots her.

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Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

Sid is awesome!! Best scene in the whole film. Yeah don’t mess with the original baby!!!! Yeah!!! But its not over. What about deputy Judy

Psych!GameofthronesSyke

She’s alive! She was wearing a bulletproof vest. In the end the body count ends at 15.

Victim #13

Victim #15

And Wes I only have one thing to say to you

Over You

So this ends our Screamtastic Saturdays kind of on a bad note, but don’t blame me. I didn’t make this film. Wes did.

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

For the previous post, go to You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Boat

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For more on the Scream series, go to All I Know About Trilogies is That in the Third One, All Bets are Off

For more modern remakes, go to Keep Clear of the Moor. Beware the Moon

For more serial killers, go to But the Book, It Will Never Close…

For more slasher films, go to It’s Happening Again, Isn’t It?

For more on Wes Craven, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?

Murder is My Favorite Crime: Laura (1944)

Laura 1944

Murder is my favorite crime.

So I strongly contemplated whether or not I wanted to include this in my Horrorfest. It isn’t really a horror film but more of a mystery thriller, even better defined as a film-noir. I really wanted to include it but, since it wasn’t a real “horror film” I wasn’t sure if I should. But then I had a moment of clarity.

zenon zetus lupetos

This is my blog. I can do whatever I want!

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

So I decided I would.

thats-how-its-done

 

So this actually started out as a play and then was turned into a novel. Otto Preminger saw it as the perfect thing to turn into a film. It is known to be one of the best Film-Noir films along with one of the best mystery-thriller films of all time. AFI ranked it #4 on their list of the 10 greatest mystery films.

This film is also famous for Gene Tierney’s portrayal of Laura. This helped give her title of “Film-Noir Queen”.

So anyways, on to the film.

So it starts off with New York City police Detective Mark McPherson (Dana Andrews).

Det. Lt. Mark McPherson laura

He is investigating the death of the beautiful, successful, advertising executive Laura Hunt. Laura was murdered by a shotgun blast to the face.

Det. McPherson starts investigating and finds himself with multiple murder suspects and motives.

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1) Waldo Lybecker

Waldo Lybecker Laura Innocent

Waldo (Clifton Webb) is a famous columnist and he was the one who actually discovered Laura. She tried to get him to advertise something for him, and faster than you could say Pygmalion, he takes her under his wing and tries to change her and “improve” her.

“Waldo Lydecker: She was quick to seize upon anything that would improve her mind or her appearance. Laura had innate breeding, but she deferred to my judgment and taste. I selected a more attractive hairdress for her. I taught her what clothes were more becoming to her. Through me, she met everyone: The famous and the infamous. Her youth and beauty, her poise and charm of manner captivated them all. She had warmth, vitality. She had authentic magnetism. Wherever we went, she stood out. Men admired her; women envied her. She became as famous as Waldo Lydecker’s walking stick and his white carnation.”

But it goes a little more than that. Waldo becomes obsessed with Laura.

800__shadow_of_a_doubt_blu-ray_04_intense stare angry upset mad creep

Yep. He is in love with her and wants to be the only man. Every time some other guy came around he would find a way to criticize them and demean them. The two broke it off, but Laura was very upset with him.

Laura Angry Mad Upset

Laura started dating another guy, Shelby Carpenter. No matter what Waldo said, Laura wouldn’t listen to him. In fact she decided to marry him.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Yep he was angry. Extremely upset about losing Laura to someone he thought was so unworthy? Angry enough to kill?

Sound suspicious

Hmm…

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2) Shelby Carpenter

laura_shelby

Shelby (played by Vincent Price) comes from great stock, has expensive tastes, and loves the high life. Only one problem, he has no money. None at all. Instead he has to use to his charms to court rich, older women and have them pay for his expenses. In fact he had found a real great giver in Ann Treadwell (Judith Anderson). That is until he met the very charismatic Laura. Not only is she the perfect cash cow to support him, but young and beautiful. Who could ask for anything more?

Shelby Carpenter: I knew there was something on my mind. Ah yes, will you dine with me tomorrow night?

Laura Hunt: Yes.

Shelby Carpenter: No, it’s not that – it’s the next night. And what about three weeks from tonight? And all the nights in between?

Laura Hunt: Shelby, you talk as if I had no other engagements!

Shelby Carpenter: And two months from now? And the month after that?

Laura Hunt: What about next year?

Shelby Carpenter: Oh, that’s all settled. What about breakfast?

Laura Hunt: What about dancing?

Shelby Carpenter: What about lunch? Beautiful lunches, day after day after day?”

The two starting dating and she gave him a job, one of which he didn’t have to do too much work. The two become engaged and all is well.

Sound suspicious

Or is it?

It turns out that Laura wasn’t the only person Shelby was seeing. He was going around with a lot of poor models. Rumor has it that Laura found out and was not happy…could he have killed her? If she was about to leave him high and dry, he might have become incensed and murdered her?

Laura Interviewing Shelby

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3) Ann Treadwell

Laura question

Ann Treadwell is the rich older aunt of Laura. She and Shelby had been in a relationship for a long time. She knew what he was, but that was what she wanted.

Laura what I want

When he left her for Laura, she was furious that her niece stole him away. Furious enough to kill?

Sound suspicious

Sound suspicious

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As Det. McPherson continues to delve into the clues and motives…he learns more and more about Laura. As he learns more and more he starts falling for Laura as well.

lauraportrait

One night Det. McPherson is at Laura’s apartment looking at her painting and trying to figure out the mystery, along with Laura. Why does she draw him to her?

When suddenly somebody comes crashing through.

annex-tierney-gene-laura_04

It’s Laura!!!

Laura Switch on you dames

But wait…

What!

But if that’s Laura? Who is…?

Who is the dead body?

They find out that the murdered girl is one of the models, Diane Redfern. The same model that Shelby was involved with.

Yep this leads Mark with another suspect…Laura

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4) Laura Hunt

Laura New Hat trying it on mirror

So we’ve heard how Laura rose from nothing to being the top girl. She was beautiful, smart, classy, etc. All women envined her and all men wanted her.

Laura Smart Intelligent woman Dopes

But then the guy she loves and is supposed to marry is running around with a model!!! Cheating on her!!!!

Ryan-Gosling-Oh-No-You-Didnt-Half-Nelson

She knew Diane was in love with Shelby, and she knew Shelby only cared about her money. She knew Shelby was taking models to her house and she could have gone after them and shot her for trying to mess with her man.

that girl is going after my man she is going to wish she was never born

Or she could be so angry at Shelby for cheating on him that she prepared a way to take care of him.

dialMforMurder Killer Hate

Instead of killing him, she could have killed Diane to make it look like Shelby and make him pay!

Does it seem too far-fetched? Well she wasn’t at the cabin when the cops looked that weekend. Her response “I was talking a walk.” She didn’t see the newspapers and come back saying she was alive? Or hear it on the radio? Her response: I don’t get a newspaper and my radio is broken.” Did anyone see you there? “Nobody”.

Being questioned police Annex - Tierney, Gene (Laura)_03

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What does this mean? Who is the killer?

You’ll have to watch the film to find out.

Laura

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

For to the previous post, go to Every Time I Bring a Girl Over, You Try to Eat Her!

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For more on Laura (1944), go to All I Know About Trilogies is That in the Third One, All Bets are Off

For more on Vincent Price, go to The World’s Greatest Criminal Mind

For more mysteries, go to Quite a Horror Story

For more films based on books, go to But the Book, It Will Never Close…

For more films based on a play, go to Some People Are Just Born Evil

Girl on Fire

So I love taking those personality quizzes, especially ones with movie characters. I have so much fun seeing which ones I match up to. I especially love zimbio, they are better than Quizilla. Quizilla was fun, but just not as cool.

So I did The Hunger Games quiz and got:

Katniss

I think it fits pretty well. I have to say I’m pretty tough and capable in most situations. I am pretty level-headed and think fast on my feet. I definitely care about my family. If any of them were chosen, I would volunteer to save them, any day. Perseverance, loyalty, honesty, and compassion are like my four most important traits. I also am an INTJ, so moral integrity, justice, etc; are extremely important to me. I’m not that big on parties, but prefer more intimate and small gatherings.

However, I am more clear on social cues and better at interacting with others. I definitely would have picked up on the whole Gale and Peeta situations. I do have trust issues like Katniss, I’m working on that though. Slow, but that’s how every process is, right?

Trust

To be honest I don’t know what I would do in a situation like the Hunger Games. I’d like to think that I would be cold-blooded to survive, but still be trusting and caring like Peeta. But, I don’t know, and I hope I never find out.

And I would start a revolution. I have tried before at an Oxfam  banquet when I tried to overthrow the high class to get a salad, but that will have to wait for another blog post. I know, it doesn’t make a whole lotta sense, but will when I write it out.

The biggest difference between Katniss and I is the whole Peeta question. I LOVE Peeta, and would have definitely pick him over Gale. I mean Gale is great but Peeta is awesome!!! Click here to read why I think so.

Peeta

To take the quiz yourself and see who you get, click here.

To read more posts on The Hunger Games go to The Hunger Games:Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory 

For more quiz related posts, go to They’re Alive

For more of my favorite quotes, go to Now You’re Gone

For more on INTJs, go to My New BF

For more on trust issues, go to The End by Silverstein 

A Reader’s Shelf

booksbooks

Some of you may not be aware of this, but Moreland is my pseudonym for this blog. So this little nugget is one I made up myself. 😀

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And this is true. When you love books you just keep getting more and more and stuffing your shelves until they burst.

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This is me.

books

This is why I need this in my life

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To read more book related posts, go to I’m Already There

To read more of my favorite quotes go to A Real Man

Project Runway

So there is a blog that I check out every now and then and I saw this little goodie and decided to share it.

projectrunway

All I could think was that he would totally lose because we all know who would win.

tilneyonmuslin

Because Mr. Tilney is that awesome.

tilney on muslin

For more on Pride and Prejudice go to The Real Revolutionary

For more on Northanger Abbey go to Words that Describe Me Perfectly