Happy Horrordays

DO YOU LIKE HORROR FILMS?

ME!!!!!

Well I do too!!!!!

horror films

So I love horror films and every October I try and do 31 posts on films, TV shows, songs, ideas, that all revolve around:

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As I am gearing up for Horrorfest V, I may be posting a little haphazardly the rest of of September. Just wanted to warn you guys as I try my best to make this year’s Horrorfest: unusual, different, and unpredictable.

I’m so excited! I just can’t wait!

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So stay tuned! So far I have ghosts, psycho killers, mutated creatures, comedy, noir, science fiction; and who knows what else is next to come!

I do know one thing:

Horror Films

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To start Horrofest: 31 Tales of Terror and Woe from the beginning, go to I Don’t Belong in the World: Carnival of Souls (1962)

To start Horrofest II: The Return of the Terror and Woe from the beginning, go to There Are Many Strange Legends in the Amazon: The Creature From The Black Lagoon (1954)

To start Horrofest III: The Revenge from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart: The Wolf Man (1941)

To start Horrofest IV: The Curse from the beginning, go to You Cannot Conquer It. It has Conquered You!: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

The Story, We’re Living it. It’s Alive: The Brothers Grimm (2005)

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The story, it’s happening to us now. We’re living it. It’s-it’s alive, it’s real, it’s breathing.

So remember way back in April, when I talked about how much I love the Brothers Grimm and all their stories?

brothers grimm fairy tales

Well for those of you who don’t, I loved them. I used to read the stories over and over and over again.

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They are such a huge, huge part of my childhood. I not only read them, but I read like every version of their tales. Such as Shannon Hale’s The Goose Girl; The Princess Test by Gail Carson Levine; or The Rumplestilskin Problem by Vivian Vande Velde. And that’s just naming a few, I’ve read practically every version and retelling out there.

LifeasaFangirl

So when I saw a trailer for The Brothers Grimm I was so EXCITED! I’m not quite sure what I was expecting, I don’t even remember what the trailer was like. I just know if it had the Brothers Grimm’s name on it. I WAS THERE!!!!!!!!

excited

My mom, sister, and went to see it and I thought…..

Whattheheck

 

WHAT THE HECK IS THIS THING? THE BROTHERS GRIMM WHAT? THIS THING IS SO CREEPY I AM SCARRED FOR LIFE!!! SCARRED!!!

Needless to say I didn’t like it.

I don't like it 11

I didn’t understands half the things that were happening! I didn’t like most of the characters. And I thought it was one of the creepiest things I had ever seen. And I was like thirteen at the the time and saw many different films, but this one creeped me out. After a while, I kind of forgot about it, other than I liked Heath Ledger (he’s always awesome) and that I actually liked Matt Damon in this.

What the

I know, I know. If you have been following you should be shocked at that statement as I have said quite a few times how much I dislike Matt Damon. I just think he is a horrible actor as he is the same in everything!! However, he was so different in this film that I actually forgot it was him. And that is what a good actor does, they melt away so all you see is their character on the screen.

So there! tongue sticking out pug

Anyways, so time past and I completely forgot about this movie. That is until I saw it on Amazon Prime Instant Watch.

It's Paul!

Amazon’s all watch this!

And I thought, hey, ten years have past. Maybe it’s time to give it another view.

The plot thickens

Why not?

And as I remember it being a horrorish/comedy film (what I call Com-Ror), I can totally review it for horrorfest. So here we go. I present to you:

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So this film is actually a melting pot. It is a historical fiction, horror, comedy, and fantasy concoction.

IndianaJonesHmmMaybe

And they actually work pretty well together.

So the film opens up with the poor Grimm family. The young sister is sick and they are all shivering from the cold as they have no more wood for a fire. Wilhelm, the oldest, is trying to be the man of the house and helping his mother while Jacob has gone out to sell the family cow. Instead of bringing back money, he has “magic beans”.

Spoke too soon

Poor, sweet, naive little Jacob. He was tricked into getting magic beans. The mom is sad, but Wilhelm becomes incensed and beats his brother.

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I know we are barely into the film and already we have a dead father, soon-to-be dead sister, a boy tricked out of everything, and then one brother getting beat by the other. That’s a really dark opening scene for a family picture.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

And by now you can kind of see the direction this film is taking. It is going to be the story pieces occurred in real life and lead to the collection of tales we have today. I have to say I was actually down with that. It could be pretty cool. The sort of prequel to Once Upon a Time or something.

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We then have the title and a killer opening scene. SUPER DRAMATIC! And I loved it! Dark night, rain, two strangers on horses with a note demanding entrance!

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It was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!

Anyways, it turns out that Wilhelm (Matt Damon), or Will as he is more often called, and Jacob (Heath Ledger), or Jake are ghost hunters/witch killers/ monster destroyers. Basically the 19th century version of Dean and Sam Winchester.

Supernatural

Say What

When I first saw this I was like what are you doing? I’m pretty sure that there were nothing like that. After watching I had to read up on them.

It turns out in real life that Jacob was actually the older brother. Their father did die when they were young and they had to take care of the family, eventually going to school for law. But later during the Romantic period, they began collecting folk tales, creating the classic literature we have today.

keanu Whoa

How did they go from that to:

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Yeah…

SayWhat?BuffyVampireSlayernosense

This was one of the reasons I wasn’t really into this “modern”, twisted type of film, in fact a lot weren’t. This film was actually ahead of its time as if it had come out a few years ago (instead of 10) it would have fit right in with Red Riding Hood (2011), Snow White and the Hunstman (2012), The Raven (2012), Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012), and Hansel & Gretal: Witchhunters (2013)I mean look at that poster! Isn’t this something you would see today?

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Eliminating Evil Since 1812 this is something you would definitely see today.

Anyways, back to the review. So the brothers are in Karlstadt to get rid of a witch menacing a mill. This is actually a pretty awesome scene as they fight the witch. I wish I could find a video. Oh well. This is kind of what it looked like:

black cauldron

So this witch comes at them and attacks. They try and destroy her, but she starts to control them and they start to fight with each other.

Spoke too soon

They fight, but Will manages to overcome it and kill the ghost. They get paid and all is well until we discover that the whole thing is fake. They hire two guys to play the monsters of the folk tales around the area, and then the Grimms come in and save the day by ridding the area of them.

Oh jeez.

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You are taking folk historians and making them not only hunters but conmen.

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Besides that, movie, I see what you’re doing.

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This is going to be one of those films where they show a fake thing in the beginning that is going to be the direction the film goes to in the end. You know like in An American Werewolf in London, where he growls at himself in a mirror, only to later do the same things as a werewolf.

Gotcha!

Oh well.

I guess we will just have to wait to see how it turns out.

So while in reality Jacob and Will were the best of friends, in this Will is extremely cruel.

Jerk

When he goes to give Jacob his half of the money, his has to throw in one last dig.

Will: Your half professor, or would you like it in beans?

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Come on Will, he was just a little boy!!!. He was trying to help!!!! Let it go!

LetGoofthePast

So while they are celebrating and having fun, we cut to the village Marbaden. A girl in a little red cape is looking through the forest. Now the forest is amazing! It is exquisitely beautiful and terrifying. It looks just like something out of an illustration in a book or a painting. The film was worth it for those moments alone.

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Anyways, the little girl becomes fightened and tries to outrun whatever it is, but doesn’t manage to and is taken.

What! Mark Wahlberg that's weird

So as the the guys are celebrating their sucess, Jacob starts to feel down. He was a scholar and is unhappy as to what he is doing now.

All I could think was why isn’t he a scholar anymore? Did he lose his job? Was it because of the French? Time for a history lesson!

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So in 1837 the two lost their posts at the university of Göttingen as they went against King Ernest Augustus I who dissolved parliament and demanded oaths of allegiance from all employees. But this film takes place earlier than that…In the early 19th century, Napoleon was seizing control of the world and had gained Western Germany. It is logical that Jacob, being rather outspoken and prone to not always thinking before he speaks, refused to do something similar to what happened at Göttingen, and lost his position.

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Moving on…

Anyways, Will has gone on to be with some bar maids, while Jacob is scribbling in his book when a man charges in. It is the famous Italian torturer, Mercurio Cavaldi. He takes them to see French General Delatombe who is strangely played by the same actor who plays Elizabeth Swann’s dad in Pirates of the Caribbean.

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They have discovered that the Grimms are conmen, having captured their other workers, and tortured them And this movie spares nothing, showing the men upside down and covered in snails.

Whattheheck

Yes, snails. I mean I hate snails and that would be torture to me, but is having snails on you really painful? Let’s look it up! And I found nothing so I’m unsure why they would do that.

Anyways, Delatombe demands to know where the 10 missing girls are. Jacob and Will have no clue what is going on.

SayWhat?BuffyVampireSlayernosense

Apparently someone has stolen 10 girls from the village of Marbaden. The French General doesn’t like that the German people are not listening and reverting back to their cultural ways. He sends the Grimms and their team to solve the mystery, or be killed. The Grimms heartily go.

Meanwhile, two siblings have decided to go looking for the missing girls, Hans and Greta (Hansel and Gretal). The forest steals Greta’s scarf away from her, using it to eventually lure her away and capture her.

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Hans races home to find his father.

Back in the villlage the town has gathered and are telling the Grimm brothers everything that has happened. Who has disappered and how they have disappered.

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As they are talking, Hans rushes in and relates what has happened. The Grimms are eager to get started and ask for a guide. They recommend the “cursed one”.

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They go see the “cursed one”, who turns out to be Angelika. Her father was a great woodsman, but died last year in the winter snow, although a body was never recovered. Her two sisters were the first to be taken, hence making her “cursed”.

Reality Sucks

Angelika doesn’t want to help, but the torturous Calvadi convinces her, by almost killing her with a knife. And then he starts hitting on her in the nastiest way. He’s just ew!

ew! Gross Yuck

Yeah…

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So with all parties in accord they journey into the forbidden forest.

Now I just want to stop and say that I really like that while the film is predominately English (of course) there is quite a lot of dialogue spoken in French and German. I like when movies do that. Good going guys.

Take note Hollywood

Take note Hollywood

Back to the forest. Will is totally in his role saying how he “feels” things and can “sense” things.

And Jacob is all, whatever Will.

Karen stop talking

But he loves the forest as it seems as if all those stories he’s studied over the years are finally coming alive. In fact he believes that this particular story they are in is about King Childeric I’s beautiful Queen. She was the fairest of all, and cared only about herself. When the black plague came, she built a tower high above the forest and the dying people. Unfortunately she still caught it, but tried to use black magic to overcome it and live forever. The spell worked, but instead of remaining beautiful, she aged.

It was this bad.

It has been over 500 years and Jacob believes that not only is she in the tower, but she is behind it all.

Will on the other hand thinks that is the stupidest thing he has ever heard

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and that someone else is trying to con the villagers.

They find the tower in the woods, of which Angelika tells them that it was destroyed, but mysteriously grew back.

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Ahhh!

Ahhh!

Some of the first creepy things we see are all these ugly black bugs coming out of stuff. It’s like The Mummy beetles or something. Then the trees keep moving all around. If that was me I’d want to get out of there asap.

Run Away

So far we have had beetles, creepy trees, and now birds. Creepy birds right out of a Hitchcock scene.

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Gilmore girls creep

They want to leave and are trying to go, but can’t find the way as the trees have moved around.

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While everyone is distracted, a wolf transforms into a person, the woodsman.

I guess a backwards wolfman?

I guess a backwards wolfman?

And feeds one of the horses spiders. And guess which horse it is? Jacob’s.

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He leaves and the Grimm team regroups eager to leave the forest. Angelika grabs a toad and talks to it, licking its belly so it will point the way.

ew! Gross Yuck

DISGUSTING!!!!

I mean seriously, what were you thinking?

At this point I was looking at Anjelika and thought, she looks really familiar. Where have I seen her before….?

suspicious Hmm

So I looked her up and it was LENA HEADEY. Man that woman, I CAN NEVER RECOGNIZE HER. She looks different in like every movie she is in. From The Jungle Book, to The Brothers Grimm, to 300, to Dredd, to Game of Thrones; man I never would have realized her characters were played by the same person unless you lined them up next to each other. And probably not even then. You’re good Lena, real good.

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So they make it back to the village. The Grimms are working as Cinderella’s in girls clothes, by orders of Calavadi.

Whattheheck

I told you he was one real sicko.

Meanwhile, a little girl hears a voice calling her. She gets up to see where it is coming from and it turns out to be one of the horses making noises. She goes over to calm it down. ALONE!

Every time!

Now this part always bothered me. We see how SUPER protective the father was of his daughter, and she knew that pretty much every girl has been captured and taken away, why would you do this alone? I would have woken up my father and been like I hear something come with me.

Now this part is truly disgusting with the horse. All these spiders come and make a web that grabs the girl, and the horse swallows her. The third most horrifying scene in this film.

There is always a but

It is so disgusting and horrible, but also very well done. The Grimm brothers and friends follow them and her and the forest is truly horrifying.

When the tree kills the man, just ouch.

Calvaldi believes that the Grimm brothers killed his men with the help of Angelika, and they all head back to see the General. Now this is the second most horrifying scene when they torture them, trying to get them to confess. They kill a kitten! A KITTEN! Why would they kill a cute orange kitten in this?

I mean seriously, what were you thinking?

I mean seriously, what were you thinking?

They convince the General they will stop it and head back to the village.

Now in this moment I realized how much I absolutely love Jacob Grimm.

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Jacob is a total fanboy!

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He loves folk and fairy tales, and has studied them for so long.

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And now he is actually in the story!! He gets to be the hero of his favorite thing to read!!! How awesome is that!!! That is like every fan’s dream. I know it was mine. There were so many places I always wanted to visit and so many tales I wanted to be the hero of. I AM JACOB.

Anyways so Jacob is really excited, but Will isn’t. In fact Will wants to take off and leave this all behind.

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And what’s wrong with that? Doesn’t everyone?

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Anyways, so Jacob tries to convince Angelika to help him out.

Will Grimm: Ignore him. He wishes his whole life was something out of a book. And now he thinks he’s in love.

Jacob Grimm: Shut up, Will!

Will Grimm: Angelika, do what your father wanted: leave the village now.

Angelika: No, Will. I’m gonna find my sisters.

Jacob Grimm: Will doesn’t care about them. Will doesn’t care about anything but himself!

Will Grimm: This isn’t a fairy tale. They are not coming back!

Jacob Grimm: This is not your world, Will! [to Angelika] Angelika, you know, don’t you? The story, it’s happening to us now. We’re living it. It’s-it’s alive, it’s real, it’s breathing. And we can give it a happy ending.

Angelika: Jake…

Jacob Grimm: Angelika, we’ll find your sisters. All right? We’ll bring them back.

Will Grimm: [getting angry] Bring back her sisters? [kicks Jacob] Bring them back? Bring them back with what? Magic beans?

Jacob Grimm: Why do you say that?

Will Grimm: Magic beans don’t work! They don’t bring people back to life! They did not then and they will not now! You go wait by the horses! Jacob, wait by the horses!

Will is such a jerk, I totally want to punch him in the face!

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Will talks to Angelika, but Jacob will not be deterred and he runs off to the forest to try and save the girls.

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But Will chases after him.

When Jacob punched Will in the face finally I was so happy. Yeah!!!!

Finally something GOOD!

Finally!

So now the brothers are back to being a team, but while they are doing that, back in the village comes the most horrifying scene ever. This is not for the weak of heart. I swear, this scene scarred me FOR LIFE! FOR LIFE!!!!

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So Sasha is going to get water from the well, when a bird falls in and…I can’t do the scene justice, you’re just going to have to watch it yourself.

OMG

That ball of goo coming to life

ew! Gross Yuck

Her face, eyes, and mouth melting away

Ahhh!

Ahhh!

Then this black blob has her face and mouth and starts following her

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then it goes inside and grabs her and eats her!

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And turns into a cookie and runs away!!!

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I am SCARRED FOR LIFE!!! It gave me nightmares, it made it impossible for me to eat gingerbread for a few years. And I wasn’t a little little kid when I saw this either. I was 13. This scene, it just

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I have to move on now.

So the Grimms are in the forest. Will has helped get Jacob on top of the very high tower,

Don't fall.

Don’t fall.

On the roof Jacob notices the coffins they saw before are numbered 12, like a clock.

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Down below Will spots something strange in the water. It’s Sasha in a dress. He goes over to look at her, when the wolf comes.

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He changes into a person and we see his face, seeing that it is Angelika’s dad!!! He goes over to Sasha and places her into a coffin. On her feet form glass slippers, and he takes one drop of blood, giving it to a raven to give to the queen upstairs.

In the mirror she looks beautiful and young, but in reality she is an old skeleton.

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She starts to charm Jacob, while below Will has to deal with her woodsman.

The whole breaking the mirror destroys the power of the witch reminds me of The Picture of Dorian Gray. The only way to kill Dorian was to destroy his picture, the only way to kill this witch, break the mirror.

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They run back to the village with Sasha, Will being the one to kiss the frog to find out the way. When they get there, Sasha is prounounced dead as she isn’t breathing, even though Will saw her walk to the coffin. While they are trying to figure things out who should show up but the French General and a mass of troops.

They declare that the Grimms are really behind it all, having killed their two workers who “confessed” it all.

They decide they are going to burn down the forest and the Grimm brothers. As they are tied up and ready to start the pyre, they toss in Jacob’s book, his collection of tales. All I could think was

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

NOT THE BOOOOOOOOOOOKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anjelika has been able to free herself and she goes and saves the boys from being burnt to a crisp. Jacob tries to save his book, but Will drags him off as his life is more important.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

NOT THE BOOKS!!!!

you're evil

Now the Queen doesn’t appreciate anyone trying to destroy her home and sends out some magic that not only stops the flames, but takes out a few guys as well.

When the get into the forrest they run into the wolfman/huntsman who reveals to Angelika that he is her father. He was dying in the forest when the Queen found him and saved him. He is in love with her and would do anything for her. Even sacrificing his own children.

Star Wars Dark side power Darth vader

Not only did he take his two youngest girls first, but he snags Angelika to replace Sasha and complete the circle of 12.

How rude

I know he’s under a magic spell, but his OWN DAUGHTERS!!!

Will is totally unsure of what to do, while Jacob is in his element and has become even more attractive. Not only is set out on saving Angelika, but he also takes out the murderous General.

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It must be nice for Jacob to be the hero for once, instead of Will.

I noticed something about the French, German, and Italians. Everyone who is not German is a crazy psychopath. We have the murderous, vain, evil Queen; the gloutton, tortourous, evil General; Calvadi the pervert and master of torture; and then the general’s right hand man just as crazy and creepy. I think it was on purpose, trying to show the way that the Germans thought of the invaders, how stereotyped and evil they are. It works for the film.

New plan

Jacob climbs up the tower to kill the queen, but the knife he picks up is enchanted and he ends up stuck to the wall. I know that he had no other weapon on hand, but come on! She’s an evil sorceress, anything in the room that belongs to her, chances are she can control them!!!

Will ends up following Jacob and when he gets there the Queen enchants the knives so that they have a duel to the death. (Just like I said they would)

I think that is a pretty jerk move to slip from the knife so you brother can kill you. I understand why you do it as it is the only way to free one of you and have him save the day, but it still is pretty mean.

As Jacob is trying to figure out what to do next, the Queen decides that dear old dad, is too old, and turns her attentions toward Will becoming her love slave. As she is turning Will, Jacob finally remembers the mirror and destroys it, killing the Queen.

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So Jacob is the hero!

      Jacob’s Hero List

  • Save the Girls ✓
  • Defeat the Evil Queen ✓
  • Save the Day ✓

Now if only he had a plan on how to get out of a crumbling castle.

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He makes it out okay, but it looks like he celebrated prematurely. The girls are still dead, or really frozen in eternal sleep.

Spoke too soon

Spoke too soon

Jacob is lost in what to do, but Calavadi, who has now become a “Grimm-y”, tells him that in his home country there is a story of true love’s kiss waking the girl. Jacob goes to kiss Angelika, but Calvadi warns him that if the love is not true than Angelika will die!

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

Jacob goes for the kiss and…

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The spell is broken. All the girls come out and are alive and well.

Double double yay

Jacob goes over to Will, but he’s not moving…

Spoke too soon

Spoke too soon

Jacob is heartbroken, but Calavadi reminds him that a kiss could wake him too. As Jacob goes, Will interupts him. Yep it turns out that Will the stinker is alive and fine. Angelika kisses him to “wake him up”; and then everyone returns to town. There the village throws a big party, happy to have everyone back.

Will Grimm: I’ve been thinking of an alternative career path.

Jacob Grimm: Will.

Will Grimm: One that uses all of our new expertise.

Jacob Grimm: Will.

Will Grimm: Now, I haven’t really sorted it yet…

Jacob Grimm: Will, Will, Will, listen. This is the real world. We’re-we’re men without a country, we’re enemies of the state, and worst of all we haven’t a single bean to our name.

Will Grimm: It’s a good name, though, isn’t it?

Jacob Grimm: It’s a damn good name. Let’s dance. Come on!

TheEnd_Title_2

So how did I like it ten years later? I liked it. It made much more sense now that I was older and more used to this kind of film style. The CGI was pretty good for a 2000’s film, and the backgrounds were just beautiful. The story was so-so, but cute and funny, except for the three deranged parts. I don’t think this would be a movie I would purchase to add to my collection, but I definitely will re-watch it in the future.

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2005TheBrothersGrimm

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To start Horrorfest IV from the beginning, go to You Cannot Conquer It. It Has Conquered You!: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

For the previous post, go to It’s Mrs. Archer. She’s on a Rampage!: Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958)

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For more Brothers Grimm, go to If the Shoe Fits: Why Cinderella is Actually Awesome

For more fairy tales, go to The Fans and the Furious

For more Horror-Comedies, go to I am the Chosen One. And I Choose to Be Shopping: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

For more on Heath Ledger, go to You’re Just Too Good to Be True: 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

For more on Matt Damon, go to A Horse’s Tale: Chinese New Year

200 Years of Glorious Emma

So as I mentioned in an earlier post, I decided instead of reading through each Jane Austen novel one by one, I will instead read four chapters of one and then move on to another, then another, etc; that way each book would get posted on. I decided to do this mainly because Mansfield Park, Northanger Abbey, and Persuasion are really forgotten in the Austen fan world. Also because it is more fun this way. I started with Pride and Prejudice as it turned 200 in 2013. Then I moved on to Sense and Sensibility as it was the first book published. I should do Mansfield Park next, but decided to wait as this year is a special year. Yes 2015 marks the 30th anniversary of 1985, of which I have written a post celebrating The Breakfast Club, will be posting one on Back to the Future, and one honoring the rest of the awesome stuff that came out that year. BUT, 2015 marks another anniversary, this Christmas marks the 200th Birthday of Emma.

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Emma is a very unique character unlike any of the other Austen heroines. Many people don’t like this book because they don’t like Emma. I know my friends who love Austen tend to like her least of all the Austen heroines as they think she is too shallow or silly. In fact Jane Austen herself said that in writing Emma:

“I am going to take a heroine whom no one but myself will much like.”

Well I love Emma. Most likely because she and I have a lot of similarities.

WhichJAheroare YOu?Emma

Sister’s amor hating you, a guy who won’t stop following you around. In my case 3), a friend who has a trifecta of boys rejecting her, deciding to become a spinster, has meddled in friends’ love lives…need I go on?

I am who I am

I am who I am

There are probably many of you out there who have had similar experiences.

But Emma is more than just fluff and comedic moments. Through this novel Jane Austen was able to share her own ideas of spinsterhood and how being a spinster who could care for one’s self (like Jane was able to) was nothing to look down on or pity.

Yep, just like her modern counterpart, Cher from Clueless, there is something about that girl that is just lovable.

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Not to mention Emma has the amazing Mr. Knightly.

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Like with the other two books, I will also will be reviewing books and films that are either another version/interpretation of the story or based on the book with a twist. Hope you all enjoy!

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Books:

Emma: A BabyLit Emotions Primer by Jennifer Adams

Jane Fairfax by Joan Aiken

Emma (Jane Austen Children’s Stories #4) by Jane Austen, adapted by Gemma Barder

A Visit to Highbury: Another View of Emma by Joan Austen-Leigh & Jane Austen

Victoria and the Rogue (An Avon True Romance #12) by Meg Cabot

“An Honest Man” by Karen M. Cox from Dangerous to Know, Jane Austen’s Rakes & Gentlemen Rogues: MODERATE edited by Christina Boyd

The Emma Project (The Rajes #4) by Sonali Dev

Mr. Knightley’s Diary (Jane Austen Heros #2) by Amanda Grange

Interference by Kay Honeyman

Emma: Manga Classics adapted by Stacy King and illustrated by Tse

Pride, Prejudice, and Personal Statements by Mary Pagones

Rational Creatures: Emma Woodhouse, Miss Bates, & Harriet Smith by Anngela Schroeder, J. Marie Croft, and Caitlin Williams; edited by Christina Boyd

Amanda by Debra White Smith

Daring Chloe (Getaway Girls #1) by Laura Jensen Walker

Film:

Clueless (1995)

Emma (1996) AKA Gwyneth Paltrow

Emma (1996) AKA Kate Beckinsale

The Jane Austen Book Club (2007)

Emma (2009)

Emma Approved (2013)

We Are Family: Austentatious, Episode 1 (2015)

Big Girls Don’t Cry: Austentatious, Episode 2 (2015)

I’ll Be Watching You: Austentatious, Episode 3 (2015)

Hit Me With Your Best Shot: Austentatious, Episode 4 (2015)

Call Me, Maybe: Austentatious, Episode 5 (2015)

Drive Me Crazy: Austentatious, Episode 6 (2015)

Make Me a Match: Austentatious, Episode 7 (2015)

Take a Chance on Me: Austentatious, Episode 8 (2015)

Achy Breaky Heart: Austentatious Episode 9 (2015)

Lean On Me: Austentatious Episode 10 (2015)

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For more on Emma, go to Opening With…

For more quizzes, go to Lookin’ Over a Four-Leaf Clover

Oh Oh De Lally

fox robin hood

Day 25) Your Favorite Disney Classic

Robin Hood

Robin Hood (1973)

So this is one of the best Disney films. Many have not seen it, so it remains a beloved little known classic. It is also one of the best depictions of Robin Hood ever made. You know why? Because the person they use for Robin Hood is perfect:

robin-hood

So just like The Great Mouse Detective this film also uses animals instead of people to tell the story, and each one was perfect for the character they are supposed to portray.

The film is told by the minstrel Alan-a-Dale, who is played by a rooster, of which is perfect because he is never quiet. He starts to tell us the story of Robin Hood who is a fox (literally and figuratively) and Little John, a bear. The two live in Sherwood Forest and rob from the rich and give to the poor. You see the people of Nottingham are not doing very well. King Richard (a lion as he was called Richard the Lionhearted) is in the Middle East fighting the crusades, and his brother John is in charge. Prince John sucks as a ruler (and sucks his thumb) and is heavily taxing the people. He leaves the  dirty work to the Sheriff of Nottingham (a wolf) and his posse. The Sheriff tries to catch Robin and Little John, but fails every time.

robin-hood

So the film starts off with Prince John charging through the forest and stopping to get his fortune read by two Gypsy women. And those women turn out to be…you guessed it Robin and Little John. The two dressed up to rob whoever was coming through and decide to take down Prince John.

Sir Hiss tries to warn Prince John that the two can’t be trusted and sure enough Prince John gets robbed blind. The guards try and chase the two and fail, fail miserably.

We then see  Friar Tuck visiting the poor, such as an injured blacksmith. He tries to give him the earnings that Robin Hood won for him, but  who should come along? The big, bad, wolf Sheriff. Yep

jerk_alert32

 The Sheriff then goes to visit a family of rabbits, one of which is celebrating their b-day and he takes all their money, the rabbit Skippy’s b-day present.

How rude

But soon a blind beggar comes on the screen who is secretly…you guessed it Robin Hood. And he makes everything better

throw confetti HIMYM

Robin gives the rabbits some money, along with his bow and arrows, for  Skippy’s b-day present.

The kids scurry off to test it out, sending an arrow into Prince John’s castle grounds. Luckily the group doesn’t run into Prince John, but Maid Marian, Robin Hood’s sweetheart (also a fox) and her lady-in-waiting, Lady Kluck (a chicken). They all play act, with Marian discussing her love for Robin and hope that he feels the same way. Lady Kluck assures her that there is no way would he forget her. After all:

Absence Heart

Back with the boys, Robin and Little John get a visit from Friar Tuck who has told them about an archery tournament that Prince John is hosting. Prince John was enraged by how Robin embarrassed him and decided he was going to take Robin down. He knew that an archery contest would be impossible for Robin to resist. Especially if the prize was a kiss from Maid Marian.

perfect plan

Robin pf course can’t resist, no matter what they say and decides that he is going to go. But he comes up with a crazy plan to get in:

Its-so-crazy

So the two head out to the competition. Little John dresses up as the Duke of Chutney and Robin is a stork. Sir Hiss figures out who hey are, but Friar Tuck and Alan-a-Dale locks him up in a barrel of ale.

So Robin competes and of course, wins.

Robin wins, but Prince John unmasks him and is about to execute him when he has a sudden change of heart. He wants to let Robin go.

Say What

It turns out that Little John is holding him at knifepoint, only to be caught by the Sheriff. What follows is craziness, chaos, and comedy. 🙂

 So the group hurries off to the forest where they have a great time making fun of Prince John.

Robin and Marian also fall in love again.

pierce–soul–Persuasion

But while that is going good, back in the castle trouble is brewing. Prince John is angry. He decides he is going to heavily tax the people, taking everything. When he takes the poor box from the church, Friar Tuck becomes so enraged that he starts fighting the sheriff.

Them's fighting words!

Them’s fighting words!

The Sheriff arrests him and they decide to hang Friar Tuck to capture Robin Hood. I don’t know why but my sis and I would randomly say this all the time in his accent. “Hang Friar Tuck?”

Anyways, so this is when we get spend some time with Sheriff’s minions, Trigger and Nutsy. It’s hilarious. I love how Nutsy announces every hour and says “All’s well!”.

Robin decides that he is going to do a jailbreak and steal all the money.

 

Everyone escapes, except Robin as he went back to save a baby and missed getting out. Him and Prince John have a fight in which he manages to escape, but  causes the castle to burn. Robin leaps from a tower into the moat below, all the while being pelted by arrows. Little John and Skippy watch and think he is dead, only to see him emerge unharmed after using a reed as a breathing tube.  King Richard returns to England, placing his brother and his cohorts under arrest and allows Robin and Maid Marian to be married and leave Nottingham with Little John and Skippy in tow.

Love that movie!

For more on Robin Hood (1973), go to Snakes on a Post

For more on Disney animals, go to Wake Up Dad

For more on Disney animated films, go to The Boys are Back in Town

For more on Disney Royalty, go to And Away We Go

For more films based on books, go to I Could Kiss You

For more films in which the main characters disguise themselves, go to This Isn’t Love, This is Ecstasy

For more on Persuasion, go to A Letter of Love

For more of my favorite quotes, go to Beautifully Miserable 

 

You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Potato: Aliens in the Attic (2009)

You’re gonna need a bigger potato.

First I want to say happy 50th! This is my 50th post! I never thought I would make so many in such a few months 😀

So I know this isn’t really a Halloweeny film; but it has aliens in it so it counts. I was up early this morning and was flipping channels and this came on. I remember when this first came out in theaters, I never saw it as I thought it was going to be extremely dumb and full of childish slapstick comedy. It was full of that, and it was pretty dumb at times; but it ended up being better than I thought it would be. I actually only came in at the end of the film, so it took a while for me to get a sense of what was going on.

So these aliens invade, and only the kids are aware of this; as always the adults are stupidly blind to anything going on.

When I came into the story, the aliens had attached these mind control devices to one of the kids, Bethany’s, boyfriend Ricky. There was also one attached to the Grandma, but the kids were controlling it. The twin boys were incredibly adorable and remind me of my nephew who is obsessed with video games.

The fight between the two, was purely structured to garnish cheap laughs from children as they watch an elderly lady kick butt.

The only thing that makes this scene even funny is the lovely Doris Roberts. I love her so much!

Bethany comes in at the end and sees her boyfriend kicked through the basement. The other kids tell her that aliens have invaded which she finds hard to believe. She goes to talk to her loser boyfriend, which we find out is a liar and cheating on her. He breaks up with her and takes off.

The adults discover the worn-torn, destroyed room and immediately yell at the oldest kid in the room, Tom (Bethany is in the basement). All the kids get sent up to their rooms as they are being punished for destroying everything.

Bethany reconvenes with them upstairs trying to do something. Tom has given up, as he feels they can do nothing to save Earth. Bethany tries to get everyone to go fight, but they won’t follow anyone but Tom.

Tom I thought was very attractive. Super sexy as he was played by Carter Jenkins. Anyways, Tom is now encouraged and they go down to the basement to defeat the aliens.

When they get there they discover their cousin Jake, played by Austin Butler. (Where has he gone? I haven’t seen him in anything recently.) He was kidnapped by the Zarkonian aliens and knows they are trying to create some kind of machine. The kids had become friends with one of the aliens, Spark, and he is the techno one that they are forcing to build the machine.

Metropolis supermachine

They are about to give up again, when Jake comes up with a mentos/cola bomb. They shoot them at the aliens which knock them all out except for the commander. Tom takes him out with his potato gun, which accidentally knocks him into the machine they were forcing Sparks to create.

Everyone cheers at this, but then Sparks tells them that it is not good, it makes the commander big!

They have to try and battle him while the other kids handle the small aliens. Jake is able to distract the commander while Tom calibrates the mathematic equation to shoot the commander with a mind controlling device. While he is doing this, one of the other aliens increases his size and the commander and him have an epic fight.

While they duke it out Sparks reverses the machine, making anything that goes through it little. Tom sends them both through the machine, with the “ugly” alien going off with his girlfriend, while the commander is seemingly zapped into nothingness.

They have stopped the aliens, but there is still an invasion coming. One the adults stupidly think are a meteor shower.

Sparks calls the aliens and tells them to retreat. After a tearful goodbye, he goes home to be with his family. All the kids enjoy the rest of their vacation, having finally bonded and become a perfect unit.

Cheesy, yes. The very, very, end was hilarious though. 😀

Hope you enjoyed that lighthearted post. More posts to come. 10 days until Halloween!

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To start Horrorfest from the beginning, go to I Don’t Belong In the World

For the previous post, go to Quite a Horror Story

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For more on aliens, go to When Potatoes Go Bad

For more on channel surfing, go to Secrets Are Great, Unless You Get Caught

For more on video games, go to Push All the Buttons!