Jason’s Out There… Watching… Ready to Kill… Thirsty for Young Blood: Friday the 13th, Part II (1981)

And if you listen to the old-timers in town, they’ll tell you he’s still out there, some sort of demented creature, surviving in the wilderness, full grown by now… stalking…Jason’s out there… watching… always on the prowl for intruders… ready to kill… ready to devour… thirsty for young blood.

So today is Friday the 13th!

And you know what that means! Time for one of my traditions!

Suit up in Ghostbusters’ clothing!

That’s how I roll

Pick up some pizza:

And watch some horror films!!!!

And of course as this isFriday the 13th in October, you all know exactly which film I will be reviewing.

Yep, this is the whole reason why I moved all the TV episodes to Tuesdays. So I could review Friday the 13th on Friday the 13th.

I was so busy with my movie marathon:

That I wasn’t able to post my review in time. I will be updating soon though. Promise! Until then:

And if you listen to the old-timers in town, they’ll tell you he’s still out there, some sort of demented creature, surviving in the wilderness, full grown by now… stalking…Jason’s out there… watching… always on the prowl for intruders… ready to kill… ready to devour… thirsty for young blood.

So you all know how I don’t like sequels:

But I decided to watch this and surprised myself in enjoying it more than I thought.

Slow down everyone, I haven’t changed that much. I didn’t say that I loved it, but I did enjoy it a lot more than I thought I wouldSo the film starts off with a review of what happened at the end of the original Friday the 13thWhen the real killer’s identity was discovered, the fight, almost drowning in the lake, etc.

Pamela Voorhees: [high voice] Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! Don’t let her get away, Mommy! Don’t let her live!
[normal voice]
Pamela Voorhees: I won’t, Jason. I won’t!

It has been two months since then, and Alice has been horrified with nightmares and flashbacks. One night she has had a bad one when Jason comes and kills her.

Why is Jason so old? In the first one he died as a child. If he becomes a ghost/monster/zombie thingy-why is he so old? He should have stayed a child. Like in the original film.

Friday the 13th (1980)

They never say why, just that he never died fully and was living on his own in the woods hunting, etc. But if he never died, than why was his mother so angry and trying to get revenge on the people who caused her son’s death. The fact that he is still alive ruins all the motivations and stuff from the first.

I will say, that Jason may be a crazy, psycho, serial killer-but he is courteous. After he kills Alice he turns off the kettle that Alice was using to make tea. That was nice of him.

Oh, well

Five years pass and Paul is a camp director, having called in the new recruits. He’s training them in the basics before the summer season starts. They aren’t at Camp Crystal Lake, like in the original, but right next door. Paul warns them of the story of Jason, but doesn’t believe in him or the things he “did”.

The next night some of the counselors go out to party in the town bar, while others have to stay behind. Two of them got caught by the police checking out Camp Blood, one guy is in a wheelchair and in training for the olympics, one girl wants to do with the olympic guy, one girl is searching for her dog, and the last guy is there to try and make it with one of the girls. Of course, Jason starts taking them all out one by one.

The reason why I liked this film was that the characters were actually not too dumb, and you felt bad that they died. I mean there was still sex scenes (this is Friday the 13th), Vicky walks around outside in her underwear to get something from the car (why?), and one of the ladies wears a shirt and shorts that cover nothing and walks around naked for a chunk of time.

But while I only cared for like two in the other film, in this one I was sad each time they were taken out.

So sad

But then Paul and his assistant Ginny come back. I don’t know why, but Jason doesn’t kill Paul-he knocks him out. Ginny has to run from him and she is hardcore. She attacks him, tries to trick him into thinking she’s his mother, and does the final knockout. Pretty sweet!

But the end is weird. Did Paul die? Why didn’t Jason kill Ginny? What’s real and what is a dream?

To start Horrorfest VI from the beginning, go to One of Our Guests is a Werewolf, I Know It.: The Beast Must Die (1974)

For the previous post, go to A Survivor… Unclouded By Conscience, Remorse, or Delusions of Morality: Alien (1979)

For more on Friday the 13th, go to Tuesday the 17th: Psych (2009)

For more camp movies, go to Someone Very Special: The Addam’s Family Values (1993)

For more on the holiday Friday the 13th, go to Don’t Fear the Reaper

For more slasher films, go to Have You Checked the Children: When a Stranger Calls (1979)

For more serial killers, go to Is She Mrs. X?: So I Married an Axe Murderer (1993)

For more sequels, go to I Don’t Kill People Anymore: Psycho II (1983)

For more ’80s films, go to China is Here Mr. Burton. The Chang Sing, The Wing Kong, They’ve Been Fighting for Centuries: Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

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How To Survive A Horror Film

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With Halloween approaching and the number of Horror films increasing, I thought it would be a good time to write a post on how to survive a horror film, just in case you happen upon this situation 😉 . Most of us have heard of the “Randy Rules” in Scream (1996), but in this we are going to look a bit more in depth in how to successfully survive a horror film.

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1) Do Not Try Out Witchcraft, Ouija Boards, or any of the Occult for “Fun.” You Will Be Messing with Forces You Have No Control Over

It is never good to mess with the occult, play around with witchcraft, or use the ouija board. When you do such things you are opening a door to a lot of stuff you don’t want to mess with. Often you open yourself or others to demon possession or evil spirits. It is best to just stay far away from such things.

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2) Do Not Make Deals With the Devil, Demons, or Other Supernatural Beings

Never, ever make a deal with the devil. It is like trying to mess with the occult or witchcraft, you are opening yourself up to serious trouble, and the devil will not like to loose his quarry. Besides, the deals/wishes you make never turn out exactly as you hope.

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3) Anything and Everything Can be a Weapon

One of the things that bothers me the most is when people are surrounded by potential weapons and don’t use them. I mean look at Scream (1996), when Tatum is in the garage and attacked by Ghostface, she tries to squeeze herself through a tiny hole to escape rather then use something, anything in the garage. I mean she is in a GARAGE!!! There are hundreds of potential weapons! USE THEM!!! That is one example, but seriously, use anything and everything.

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4) Don’t Stop Assaulting Your Attacker Until You are Sure They Are Not Going to Get Up

Now this is huge. In horror movies, if the person is able to outwit the killer and knock them out, they usually just leave it at that and take off. DON’T! You knock that sucker out until you are sure they are no longer going to try to injure you. Break their legs if necessary. Because if you don’t, they are just going to recover and come after you.

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5) If Someone Gives You a Protective Charm Do Not Give It Away

I have mentioned this in Dracula (1931), The Mummy (1932), The Wolf Man (1941), Scream 2 (1997), and many more. If someone gives you some kind of charm that is supposed to help you and only work for you, DO NOT GIVE IT AWAY!!!! It will only work FOR YOU!!!! That is why it was given TO YOU!! And if you give it away you are just going to get yourself and the person you were trying to help in serious trouble. Keep it and protect yourself so that you can actually help others, instead of accidentally killing them.

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6) Sex = Death

As Randy says in Scream, Sex = Death. Never overlook the purity angle, it is like a protective charm. If you don’t do it, you are less likely to die.

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7) Doctors are Almost Always Evil

Sometimes Doctors can be good people, but if you are in a horror film, forget it; they are usually evil. Such as Dr. Hartz from The Lady Vanishes (1938), he seems kindly and trying to help, but in reality just wants the main character to think they are going crazy! Same thing in Dr. Hollingshead from The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (1947). Then you have doctors who commit horrible things in the name of science; like We have Dr. Frankenstein (from any Frankenstein film) who tries to create life and can’t control his monster. Or  there is Dr. Arthur Carrington from The Thing From Another World (1951), who almost kills everyone as he doesn’t care about human life but scientific discovery is what matters. Not to mention Dr. Alfred Brandon from I Was a Teenage Werewolf (1957), who experiments on teenage boy. And lets not forget Dr. Hannibal Lecter, who eats people. I could go on, but there are too many examples to choose from.

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8) Do Not Spend the Night in an Abandoned or Haunted House, Psychiatric Hospital, or Carnival

I mean seriously. Just do not go there. Nothing good will ever, ever, ever come of it! I mean look at The Uninvited (1944), House on Haunted Hill (1959), House on Haunted Hill (1999), The Hunting (1963), The Haunting (1999), etc. I could go on and on, but let’s continue with our list.

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9) If There is a Curse on Something Do Not Touch It

I know curses, many laugh at them; but of you are in a horror film and you see something that says it is cursed DON’T TOUCH IT! It is better to live another day then to have yourself face all kinds of horrors.

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10) Do Not Drink Any Potions or Test An Experiment On Yourself

NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER test a potion or try an experiment on yourself. It always ends badly! I mean you have Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, The Fly, Batman’s Man-Bat he had to fight, even Goosebumps did an episode where the dad ended up creating a plant clone of himself. I know many don’t like animal testing or get under the stress of trying to accomplish something; but just stop! Don’t test yourself or else something bad will be created.

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11) If There is a Murderer Running Around, Do Not Go Out and Party

This drives me crazy! A murderer is running around killing people and people decide to: 1) not take any precautions; 2) go about their lives like nothing is different; and 3) party. If there is a murderer running around, yes it is good to be in a group (rule 12 & 17) but you shouldn’t be out partying, drinking (rule 13) or putting yourself in a dangerous situation.

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12) Never Split Up

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NEVER, EVER, EVER go anywhere by yourself. There is power in numbers! As a group you could take a killer down, versus as a couple or single. When you split up, all you do us make it easier for someone to kill you.

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13) Do Not Do Drugs or Drink

While some of you might enjoy that type of thing it is never a good idea in a horror film. Anytime you try something that will keep you from thinking clearly, you are in serious trouble as you are likely to make bad decisions that will lead to your death. It is better to just say no.

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14) Always Call the Police

If you are being attacked, threatened, harassed, etc.; call the police. Don’t try and take care of it yourself, don’t try to investigate, call FOR BACKUP! That’s their job!!! They have guns and can make an arrest!

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15) Never Say “I’ll Be Right Back”

Unlike the Terminator here, you won’t be back. Uttering these words is signing a death warrant, as soon as they leave your lips you become next on the killer/creature’s hit list.

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16) Never Say “Who’s There?”

Killer Scary Movie

Never say “who’s there”. If the person was a friend, they wouldn’t be skulking around your house in the first place, trying to scare you. Instead they would knock, ring the doorbell, or call out to you. The only type of person who would be creeping in your house is one who intends on harming you. And if you call out “who’s there”, you’re just helping them find and kill you faster.

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17) Do Not Go Out to Investigate a Strange Noise

When you hear something strange outside, do not go out and look into it. You should wait for assistance or call in the police. If you try looking yourself, you are going to end up in a trap set by a monster, psychopath, murderer, etc. Besides, why unlock the door or turn off the alarm; allowing whatever is watching you the opportunity to come in and attack? Just stay inside snug like a bug.

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18) Do Not Use the Bathroom

Have you ever though of how vulnerable you are in the bathroom? Most have no windows to flee from or they aren’t the most accessible. Some do, but for most the only easy way out is the door, which is where most attackers will come through. Plus the reason you would be in the bathroom; shower or toilet, you won’t have any weapons to help you and it would be extremely easy to kill you. If you are in a horror film, just hold it or stay stinky. You are more likely to live that way.

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19) Never Go Off By Yourself

Like I said before, the less people around you, the easier you are to kill. If you go off on your own to investigate, look around, run away; you are just putting a giant target on your back. Stay together, it is safer.

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20) Always Look Behind You and Above You

Always take a 360 degree look around you. They may be behind, they may be in front, they may even be above you. Search every angle!!!

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21) Be Nice, A Person Scorned or Mistreated Can Do Horror-ble Things

In horror movies, there are lots of people who have been bullied so much and hurt by others they end up becoming homicidal maniacs. And who do they tend to attack first? The last person to hurt them. Look at The Phantom of the Opera (any version), Carrie (1976), Hangman’s Curse (2003), Heathers (1985), etc. So if you don’t want to end up being first on the hit list be kind to those you meet.

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22) If You Are a Girl Or Not White, Be Extra Cautious

Psychopaths and monsters love to kill/eat women and minorities. Because of this if you are either, or both; take extra steps to protect yourself. Be like Ben in Night of the Living Dead.

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23) Don’t Trust Anyone, They Are All Suspects

People can tell you all kinds of things, but that doesn’t mean they are telling the truth. If you find yourself in a horror film, don’t trust anyone. And I mean ANYONE!

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24) Never Judge a Book By its Cover

Never judge a book by its cover. Someone who seems sweet, innocent, impossible to commit cruel acts, etc; could secretly have evil intentions lurking under the adorable facade. Always be watchful and once again, trust NO ONE!

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25) Children can Be Evil too, Never Rule Them Out

When trying to figure out who the murderer is, never overlook kids. I mean sure some will be obvious in their creepiness, such as the one pictured above, but there are many who look innocent and sweet but are actually evil. Don’t be fooled!

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26) Never Try to Create Life

NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER try to create Life. It just does not go the way you plan. You can’t control the beasts you create and they just run amuck everywhere. I mean look at FrankensteinBride of Frankenstein, Jurassic Park, Jurassic World, Alien: Resurrection, the list goes on but I’ll stop here.

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27) Never Try to Control a Monster

In any horror film, whenever they create  life they always think they have complete control over it. Well, that never works out. You see, just because you made it doesn’t mean it will listen to you; every parent knows that. And more often than not, those creations will try and kill you.

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28) If Someone Tries to Make a Deal with You to Kill Someone, Do Not Think it is a Joke

Joking around with the idea of murder might be something you would do with a friend, but be careful, you never know how far they might take it.

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29) Listen to Urban Myths, They Tend to be Right

We all like to hear scary stories around a campfire and about areas. But if you are in a horror film, play very close attention as more often than not, the myths and legends turn out to be true or someone is copying them and making them true. It is always good to pay attention and know the details, it just might save your life.

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30) Never Think You Have Destroyed a Monster, They Always Find a Way to Come Back

You try to kill them and you think you do, but they always come back. Always make sure you keep an eye out for the sequel and their return.

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31) Don’t Be an Idiot

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Be smart! Don’t be stupid and do stupid things. Use your common sense! Bimbos and Mimbos are almost always the first to die.

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So there we are, 31 tips to help you survive a horror film. I hope they help you survive October.

This post is brought to you by a

horrornerd

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To start Horrorfest V from the beginning, go to Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

Keep tuned for more horror film reviews!

Horrorfest IV: The Curse

HalloweenStartsNow

Sorry, sorry, for the messy posting and the lack of posting. I have just been so excited for Horrorfest and trying to get everything ready in between work and all my other commitments.

So October is upon us, and while:

 

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October is the penultimate.

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So what do I have planned for you this year? Every year has had something extra planned, beyond just reviewing horror film. In Horrorfest (2012), I reviewed what I call the Big Three in remakes & sequels, Friday the 13th (1980), Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)and Halloween (1978)

I see more sequels and remakes coming in the future.

I see more sequels and remakes coming in the future.

The year after that, Horrorfest II: Return of the Terror and Woe, I posted on the odd days of October. I also reviewed all three Jurassic Park films: Jurassic Park, The Lost Worldand Jurassic Park III

It was great

It was great

Then last year, Horrorfest III: The Revenge was the best Horrorfest I have ever done. I was able to get it halfway completed, before October 1st even came around. Last year I did a Werewolf theme: I started with The Wolf Man (1941) and ended with The Wolfman (2010), and making nine out of the thirty-one reviews Werewolf related.

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And I also reviewed all four films in the Scream series: Scream, Scream 2, Scream 3and Scre4m.

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And I reviewed three Alfred Hitchcock films: Shadow of a Doubt (1943), Under Capricorn (1949)and Dial “M” for Murder (1954). Yes, I had to make up for lost time.

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I even finally got around to reviewing a Vincent Price film, Laura (1944)

Laura Interviewing Shelby

So what do I have planned for this year? Well you’ll just have to wait to find out.

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After all:

BetterWhenScared friday the 13th jason voorhes

So stay tuned for 31 days of terror, woe, mystery, murder, monsters, mad scientists, vampires, witches, robots, stalkers, serial killers, and much, much more!

Happy Halloween jack-o-lantern

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To start Horrorfest from the beginning, go to I Don’t Belong in the World: Carnival of  Souls (1962)

To start Horrorfest II, from the beginning, go to There are Many Strange Creatures in the Amazon: Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)

To start Horrorfest III, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart: The Wolf Man (1941)

Beast or Man: The Wolfman (2010)

There is no sin in killing a beast, only in killing a man. But where does one begin and the other end?

So this year I decided to do something very, very different. Now the in the past, all Horrorfests have ended on a film that takes place on Halloween. This wasn’t a credence that I set out to make, it just kind of happened along the way. With Horrorfest I had always planned on ending on Halloween (1978)I knew it was the best way to end the first year with a big bang. Besides, that year I had done the other slasher films that spanned numerous sequels and remakes (Friday the 13th Nightmare on Elm Street). Horrorfest II I was trying to also end on a really great film that would produce the same kind of bang, and decided on Children of the Corn as that film was creepy. It also happened to take place on Halloween.

This year I was trying to decide what would be the best opener and closer. I was originally going to open with Metropolis as I had done a post in July referencing it. But after I wrote that post, it just didn’t speak to me as an opener. I started going through my drafts and that’s when I spotted The Wolf Man (1941)The Wolf Man has to be my favorite of the classic horror film monsters (along with The Phantom of the Opera). I hadn’t had a chance to review it yet, and since it was the last of the classics I decided it should be the opener.

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Once I wrote that post, I was so excited. You see, I felt I really couldn’t to a post on any werewolf films until I had covered the first one. I thought it was only right to start with the original. With that done, I could move onto any other werewolf film I desired. The possibilities were endless.

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With the beginning finished, I then set my sights on the end. What could I do that would really pop? As I started thinking and looking, I saw my draft for The Wolfman (2010). And that’s when it hit me.

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I could end Horrorfest III with The Wolfman (2010). It could be like bookends!!!! In the beginning the original that started it all  and the end the newest rendition. !!! Yes!! It could work and it will. So here we are The Wolfman (2010).

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So a little backstory before we begin the review. As you would have read in an older post, I love The Wolf Man (1941). It is one of my all-time favorite horror films. One day in my photography class, we were watching trailers of different films as we were looking at the cinematography and technique. My teacher was on a Mac which has Front Row, and shows you trailers of the past, present, and future films. One trailer I remember looking at was Nightmare on Elm Street (2010). I wasn’t planning on seeing it, as I hadn’t seen the original. But as we reached the end, I saw The Wolfman.

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I screamed ay my teacher, stop!! I want to see that. So we watched the trailer.

AWESOME!!! RIGHT!!! So I knew there were going to be changes, I knew it was going to be nowhere near as good as the original, but I was soooo pumped!! So I watched the trailer in February 2009, and saw the film was slated for that October. I couldn’t wait!!!

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I ticked off the months, but then in October I discovered it wasn’t out in theaters.

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Yep, there had been some production problems, so they pushed it back to February. FEBRUARY!!! V-Day weekend. I was upset, but what could I do? I just had to wait it out.

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But then February came and I decided that it would be my V-day present to myself. You see I have never had a boyfriend or date for V-day, so I always just buy myself whatever I want. It’s actually pretty nice as you don’t have to fight with anyone over where to go or what to see; and you are never, ever, ever, disappointed.

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I asked a couple of friends who were also single and we bought tickets for opening night. I knew that I wouldn’t be 100% pleased, but I was looking forward to those improved transformation scenes.

So moving on to the review.

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So let’s go back in time. The year is 1891 and we are in England. Lawrence Talbot (Benicio del Toro) is the second son of Sir John Talbot (Anthony Hopkins). He and his dad had a lot of issues and problems so he left as soon as he could. Since then he has been a renowned Shakespearean actor, famous throughout all England for his Hamlet and Macbeth.

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He recieves a letter from a Gwen Conliffe (Emily Blunt). She was engaged to his older brother Ben, but he has been murdered. Not only was he murdered, but horribly mangled by something. When Lawrence gets the news, he immediately returns home for the funeral.

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When he gets there he sees his father and the two have a harsh welcome. Unlike The Wolf Man (1941), where father and son were trying to work on repairing their relationship, Sir John doesn’t care. He still has huge issues with his son not being what he wants him to be. The way that Sir John treats him, causes Lawrence to want to leave, and go far away…but he can’t. He has to properly say good-bye to his brother.

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Lawerence does try to get away from his father as he knows staying near him will just cause more fights. He also really wants to see his brother. So he heads down to the local slaughterhouse where the body is kept before burial.

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I know but you have to remember this is a small village in 19th century England. They didn’t have a mortuary to hold the body until burial. They also didn’t understand how diseases spread and that it is not a good idea to have a dead body near your food.

There at the slaughterhouse, the butcher gives Laurence his brother’s items, that is everything found on him at the time of his death.

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Later that night he heads over to the local pub for a drink and overhears the gossip on the murder. Most of the villagers blame a band of gypsies. Not long after they moved into the area, Ben was murdered. In fact, someone remembers a case occuring years earlier of gypsies moving into the area and dead bodies surfacing. As they discuss this, Laurence remembers that Ben had had a gypsy medallion on him.

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This is the first time that Laurence has ever met his brother’s fiance Gwen. Now for you Wolf Man fans, you should recognize that it is the same name given to Laurence’s love interest in the original film. Except in that film she was to marry the hunter/groundsman of the Talbot estates. Anyways, Laurence meets her and can instantly see why his brother fell for her, as he himself is attracted to her.

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Of course Lawrence is the most amazing, gentleman/good guy that he would never ever think of putting the moves on her. He does thank her for trying to be there for his father and for everything. He also let’s her know that if she ever needs him, he’ll be there for him.

Gwen is also attracted to him, and you really can’t blame her. If Benecio is in his early 40s, that means her husband to-be was hecka old. Also Benecio/Lawrence has this adorable hurt puppy dog look that makes you just want to show him he is special, and that you care for him. He looks so sad that it makes you just want to take him, and take care of him. Making sure is life is bright and never unhappy again. That look is killer on any girl as it flies through their best defenses. Major chink in the armor.

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Sorry, digressing….So with Lawrence back, and the funeral over, Gwen decides to return to London. Laurence would like to leave too, but wth his brother’s death, he now is sole heir to the estate and the first son. When his father dies he will become Sir Lawrence and be expected to uphold all those duties (House of Lords most likely). This isn’t the life that Laurence wants, but at this moment he is too loaded with grief and confusion over his brother’s death that he doesn’t question or try to rebel.

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So with Gwen gone, and his father an emotionless robot who only cares about himself; Lawrence takes it upon himself to try and figure out what happened to his loving brother. Now Lawrence is putting on the black cowl and trying to become a vigilante or anything, he just wants some closure about his brother’s death. He heads down to the gypsy camp to try to get some answers.

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Where were you the night in question?

That night is a full moon

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Which as you’ve guessed it means trouble is going to be roaming about. Lawrence meets up with the gypsy woman Maleva, who tells him that something truly evil has attacked his brother.

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But before he can get anything more, the townspeople attack the village. They try to drive the gypsies from the area, and kill a dancing bear they believe to be the beast that killed Ben Talbot.

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Grab your torches and sharpen your pitchforks!

As they are attacking, a superhuman, wolfish creature descends upon the area and starts slaughtering people.

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And I’m not talking about just a few people, this is like a Scream sequel. The body count by the end of this film is in the double digits.

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Hey, my generation is the Millennials. They aren’t as classy, they need lots more blood and guts.

Anyways, the werewolf is attacking everyone, and Lawrence spots a young boy running into the woods. At the same time the werewolf spots the boy, causing Lawrence to put himself in the way in order to protect the child. As he does so, the wolf attacks him.

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And he gets bitten.

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Malvea find him and cares for him, despite the community telling her that it is better for all if they let him die. But Malvea can’t, she says he still is a man and deserves to be treated as such. She also states that only a loved one can kill him.

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Malvea honey, I don’t think so. Anyone can kill a werewolf as long as they have some kind of silver object. Nowhere is that in the original film, as if you read my post you would know that film revolutionized werewolf mythology. Click here to check it out now.

And besides that, is there nothing you can do for him? You are a cinematic gypsy in a horror film! You’re supposed to have a potion or herb or special thing that can protect you from turning. Now if you have read my DraculaThe Mummy, The Wolf Man, or Scream 2 posts, you know I make fun of the films when the guy is given a special charm to protect him but then stupidly turns it over to the girl he loves, EVEN THOUGH IT WILL NOT WORK FOR HER.

Every time!

Every time!

But I really enjoy that part of the film, as it humanizes the character and makes you adore them. I mean its sweet how much they love the girl in their life that if there is anything that can do to ward of the monster, they prefer them to have it. Even though by doing so they make things worse, hey it’s the thought that counts.

Frozen Sacrifice self love you sisters

I also hate how gypsies have been giving “B” standing in modern horror films. I mean without their supreme wisdom and knowledge in the supernatural, they are just nomadic people. In real life they are still awesome, in a  horror film? That’s just boring.

Bones David Bored I;m bored boring

But I guess that’s just they way it is these days.

Sadface Batman

So where was I? Oh yeah, Lawrence has been bitten by the werewolf. He is moved back to Talbot Manor, and Gwen returns from London to nurse him back to health. While recovering he has really strange dreams. Lots of blood, murder, and even his mother appears. You see his mother died when he was very, very young and her death severely traumatized her as he discovered her dead body. But why would that death be haunting him now? Is it because of Ben? The slaughtered people seen in the gypsy camp? Or is it something else?

suspicious  Hmm

Lawrence actually heals pretty quickly, which he finds kind of odd. And that’s not the only thing that’s odd in the Talbot homestead. One day his father’s manservant, Singh (Art Malik), shows him a case of silver bullets and hints that something monstrous is walking through the woods.

Weird

Weird

He’s not the only one concerned. Inspector Abberline (Hugo Weaving) comes to town. Yes, yes I’m going to admit it. Any film with Hugo Weaving gets an 10x increase in awesome. I mean this guy is truly one of the most talented actors alive. When he ecomes a role you totally forget that he is Hugo Weaving and just think of him as that character. For me I’m always going, Hugo Weaving was in that film? Oh that’s who was that amazing character. I totally forgot that character was being played by an actor. I mean he is that  good. You have Agent Smith in The Matrix, Elrond in The Lord of the Rings trilogy, V in V for Vendetta, the Red Skull in Captain America: The First Avenger, and that’s just to name a few.

wolfman 2010 inspector abberline hmm i've almost got it hugo weaving

Anyways, Inspector Abberline comes to town to investigate. He already believes he knows who the killer is…Lawrence.

Yeah I don't understand it either

Seriously? Lawrence? A Murderer? Come on, this guy wouldn’t hurt a fly. I mean look at him, really look at him. There isn’t a murderous bone in his body! Besides, he just arrived in town so there is no way he could have murdered his brother. Dude, you’re dumb.

felix_the_cat_laughing

But it isn’t completely ungrounded. You see, Lawrence has a history of “mental problems.” You see, I didn’t want to give you the full story so early, but Lawrence’s mother’s death really did a number on him. Now today, we would really try to help the child as we understand such events as those are highly traumatic and can cause serious issues. Then not so much. Lawrence discovered the body and was very upset. He was afraid and kept mentioning a monster had hurt her. Instead of trying to help his kid, Sir John sent him to an insane asylum, where he was tortured. And I mean torture. Many methods to improve these patients were electrotherapy, iron cuffs/collars, bloodletting, dipping the patient in hot or ice-cold water, and a gyrating chair “to shake up the blood and tissues of the body to restore equilibrium”. By the 1900s, many hospitals had added lobotomies to their lists of “cures”.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah not fun. So Aberline thinks he is the perfect suspect. Laurence though, is having none of that.

Lawrence Talbot: I get your implication, and resent it. You’re clearly aware of my personal history, as I believe I’m aware of yours. Weren’t you in charge of the ripper case a couple of years back?

Det. Aberline: You’re a direct man. So I’ll be equally direct with you. I am not your enemy, Mr. Talbot. You’ve been seen as Hamlet, Macbeth, Richard III, all with that same face. A prudent man would ask who else might be living inside that head of yours?

Laurence doesn’t quite know what is going on and asks Gwen to leave as he’s worried something might happen to her. That night he follows his father, and watches him go down to the family crypt, to the area where his dead mother resides. There he finds a chair with restranints. His father locks the door and stays in the crypt, leaving a confused Laurence.

Weird

Weird

As Laurence turns to go inside, he becomes…The Wolfman!

wolf

Now this was worth the price of admission. These transformation scenes are awesome!!!

Freakin’ sweet!

So now that he is a wolfman, he does what they all do. Ravage the countryside.

Film Title: The Wolfman Claw

The next day the Inspector comes for him and has him arrested to be sent back to the “mental hospital”

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

How horrible is that. I mean this has to be Laurence’s biggest fear, to be sent back to that horrible place. Poor guy. And I was doing some research last night, not only were insane asylums awful, but the one he has to go to, Bedlam, was one of the worst.

you're evil

Dr. Hoennegar, the leading physician, takes Laurence under his wing and subjects him to ice treatments, that is to be consistently dunked into ice water and left there for long periods of time.

the-wolfman-2010-freezing-therapy

Can you imagine?

And oh joy, he also gets electroshock therapy.

Stupid, stupid

While he is incarcerated, Sir John comes to visit and tells him a story. You see Sir John is the cause of all this.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

Back in the day when he was younger and hunting in India, he heard this rumor about an unusual predator. He travels to the remote cave that the predator calls his home and while there was bit by a feral boy and became a victim of lycanthropy.

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Except, it was more than “imagining” he actually became a werewolf and began attacking things.

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That’s when Laurence realizes everything about his mother’s death makes total sense. He did see a beast kill her, but it was his father! His father killed his mother and then sent him to a mental institution!!! What a truly, truly evil man to allow his son to be tortured. And now for a second time!!!

you're evil

Now this was my biggest issue with the film. Every other part of the movie was actually pretty great. It was an amazing homage to the orginal film. Benecio del Toro was actually a huge fan of the original and tried to bring a lot of Lon Chaney Jr. into his acting. But the thing I absolutely hate was the changed relationship with his father.

HateEverythingthewomen

It just didn’t work in my opinion. I mean that is what truly made the original fantastic, was that everything in his life was going great, he was a great man; and this tragedy strikes that ruins everything. He and his father were finally, finally becoming close and working out all their issues. He had met a nice girl, even though she was engaged, and had hope for that relationship. He loved England and was getting back into the groove of it. But then this horrible thing happens and he has to say good-bye to it all. He knows he is going to die, but what does he do? He goes to his dad and makes sure that he has something to protect him. Because even though he has spent years hating and being angry at his father, he truly loves him. It’s just so wonderful and sad all at the same time

The_Wolf_Man_4Crying sad

But having the dad the evil guy, I don’t know…it just makes the film feel as if it is missing a huge part of it. It doesn’t hit in the heart like the orginal.

But moving on, so his father murdered his mother and then sent the only witness to a torture chamber (mental hospital) to ensure that those memoris would never come to light as they are only crazy “child fantasies”.

you're evil

Since then, Sir John has had his manservant Singh has been locking him up so he doesn’t wreck havoc anymore. However, Ben was planning to leave with Gwen once they were married and this enraged Sir John. He wasn’t locked up that night and killed him to keep him from going away. He became so incensed with the power that he ran wild later, killing all in the gypsies camp and biting Laurence purposely.

Omg what a–

wordICan't say Toy Story

He did it on purpose because he wanted a fall guy. He wants to roam free as a werewolf and he allows his son to be caught and tortured. Argh!!! Urhg! this man! I;m so angry I can’t spell right. He needs a good sock in the face.

dean_punching_supernatural

After he finishes his story he leaves, intent on never returning.

Jerk

He deserves another punch.

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That night Laurence is taken to the observation room, where the good doctor presents him as a curio to his collegues. Unbeknowest to him, moonlight is coming through the window and landing on Laurence. This causes him to turn into….the Wolfman!

wolfman

This is one of the coolest scenes, but unfortunately I could only find it in Italian. Sorry! But you don’t really need to understand what they are saying to enjoy the effects/makeup.

Dr. Hoenneger: Ah, Mr. Talbot. We are here tonight to illustrate conclusively that Mr. Talbot’s fears are quite irrational. So, we will remain in this room together, and once Mr. Talbot has witnessed that the full moon holds no sway over him, that he remains a perfectly ordinary human being, he will have taken his first small step down the long road to mental recovery. We are all aware that Mr. Talbot has suffered quite traumatic personal experiences. He witnessed his mother’s self mutilations. His young mind, unable to accept it, created a fantastical truth, that his father is to blame. That is father is literally a monster. But, your father is not a werewolf. You were not bitten by a werewolf. You will not become a werewolf, any more than I will sprout wings and fly out of that window.

Freakin’ AWESOME

Totally fangirl over that.

Laurence runs away, being chased by the Inspector, and also wreaking havoc. There are some truly amazing shots of him by the bridge, on statues. Just plain awesome!

wolfman statue on tiop of werewolf

The next day he visits Gwen in her antique shop. They realize they have fallen in love, but Laurence knows nothing can come of it. He has to kill his father and himself in order to protect others.

the_wolf_man_1941_larry_is_talking_to_gwen

Inspector Abberline comes to see if Lawrence is there, but he is too late. Lawrence has already left for Talbot estate.

Gwen refuses to believe that they can’t be together. She starts studying lycanthropy and tracks down Maleva the gypsy for more advice. Maleva cannot help her, as there is no cure for werewolf.

Noo!

Noo!

Meanwhile, the Inspector has also headed back to the village and this time armed with silver bullets. That show in the Observation room must have finally convinced him that werewolves are real. Gwen also heads toward Talbot Hall.

Lawrence is the first to arrive and discovers a murdered Singh. He takes his gun loaded with the silver bullets and starts hunting his father.

Sir John Talbot: You have me at a disadvantage. It makes me happy.

Lawrence Talbot: What does?

Sir John Talbot: Well, seeing you here like this. My son returned. It is glorious, isn’t it?

Lawrence Talbot: No, it’s hell.

Sir John is a freak. He needs help. Serious help.

Anyways, it turns out there are no bullets in Singh’s gun, but blanks. Sir John did that on purpose as he will not be destroyed. Sir John attacks his son and the two begin fighting. The full moon comes up and transfroms them into werewolves. And yes, yes we have a werewolf fight. I personally thought it was a little cheesy (and dumb) but this is the millenal generation. And it is something the people want.

So after Laurence burns and decapiitates his father, Gwen walks into the house.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GWEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The wolfman, Lawrence, attacks her. Luckily, the inspector had also just arrived on the scene. He tries to use his gun, but misses allowing him to be bit by the werewolf. Gwen steals the gun and takes off, being pursued by the wolfman.

wolfman 2010 hiding from wolfman

He chases her to a waterfall. With nowhere left to go, Gwen starts begging and pleading with the wolfman, hoping to get to Lawrence. Lawrence reason faintly returns to the beast, who hesitates. He then hears the sound of a posse coming to attack him.

mob

Grab your torches and sharpen your pitchforks!

While he is concentrated on them, Gwen shoots him through the heart.

Noo!

Noo!

Laurence changes back to his human form, and before he dies thanks Gwen for saving him.

Lawrence Talbot: [his eyes open after being shot by a silver bullet and transforming back into a human] Gwen?

Gwen Conliffe: [crying] I’m sorry…

Lawrence Talbot: It had to be this way.

Gwen Conliffe: I’m sorry.

Lawrence Talbot: [he holds her hand] Thank you. [Dies]

aw cry

The posse and an injured inspector arrive just as Laurence dies.

So that is The Wolfman. Now do I think it is as good as the original? HECK NO! But that does not mean it isn’t an awesome film. Besides that one thing that majorly irks me, I really enjoyed it. I thought it was a pretty awesome film. The cinematography is beautiful, the acting incredible, and those transformation scenes? Freakin’ awesome! And I did like how they moved the story to show how harshly “mental disabled” people were treated. And you know what? Most of the people who were in those didn’tr even have serious problems. They would throw in the homeless, those with learning disabilities, women of large fortune who had husands that wanted the money but not the girl, etc. It was horrible. Horrible.

But back to the film, I think it is a worthwile view. It may not be exactly how I imagined it, but you do have some great werewolves in this, and no Jacob ones. Real werewolves.

2010The Wolfman

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And so ends another Horrorfest. I am so pleased with this years as I was able to redeem myself from last year’s only half the month’s posts. 31 days of terror and woe once again. I hope you all enjoyed it. I wish you all a very happy, and safe, Halloween. May it be everything you wish it to be.

Happy Halloween jack-o-lantern

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

For the previous post, go to The Perfect Murder

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For more on werewolves, go to Werewolves Roam Among Us

For more monster movies, go to There’s Nothing Out There. Nothing in the Mist

For more on 19th century England, go to The Past of a Man

For more on insane asylum, go to I Bid You Welcome

For more remakes, go to Don’t F*** With the Original

Tuesday the 17th: Psych (2009)

Tuesday the 17th

I knew we never should have come back here

So this episode of Psych is a parody of Friday the 13th, hence the Tuesday the 17th. I thought that since we don’t have a Friday the 13th or a Tuesday the 17th, so I thought it would be awesome to have this on Friday the 17th, so its a combination of both.

So for those of you who aren’t Psych fans, the series is about a guy, Shawn Spencer, who pretends to be a psychic and works with the Santa Barbara Police Department. His BFF, Burton “Gus” Guster, helps him out. He works with Head detective Carlton Lassiter and junior detective Juliet O’Hara.

*Spolier Alert*

So the episode starts off with Shawn and Gus in their preteens at summer camp. They are being picked up by Shawn’s dad, and Shawn is pissed. He is mad at for Gus choosing Jason as a partner over him for the piñata contest. (They picked the name Jason in reference to the boy and later killer, Jason Voorhees.) As we transition to the present we get a the theme song from Friday the 13th series and a creepy view of Shawn’s piñata, Rick Astley, stuck under the water.

Friday the 17th

20 years later a girl, Annie (named after the stupid Annie that is killed in the original Friday the 13th) is sitting down watching one of the Friday the 13th films.

Ren Stevens: What? Honey, you're chased by six mutants, and you just decided to take a shower?

Ren Stevens: What? Honey, you’re chased by six mutants, and you just decided to take a shower?

She decides to go off, when the phone rings like When a Stranger Calls.

When-a-Stranger-Calls-s01

But its just her friends and she tells them she is feeling sick and going to stay home. All of a sudden she is attacked from behind!!!

Tuesdaythe17th

Back at the Psych building, Shawn and Gus find Shawn’s old summer camp piñata hanging outside their building. Jason did it as a joke as he came to ask the two to help them. Jason is reopening the summer camp this upcoming Friday, but one of his counselors, Annie, is missing. Shawn doesn’t want to return, but Gus convinces him to go back there.

There the two meet Billy (named after Billy in Scream), the jock and fitness counselor; Clive, the nerd and the water instructor; and Sissy, the damsel in distress in charge of arts and crafts. They start investigating, when Jason starts acting weird. He keeps speaking strange and walking around with a dummy.

tuesday the 17th

They start breaking up into twos and singles, which angers Shawn as everyone is breaking the horror film rules. Never split up!

Randy Scream

While they go off into the woods, Billy gets taken by the killer.

Tuesdaythe13th

They all meet up again, at 6:00 minus Billy. Sissy shows Gus and Shawn the laundry room; in which they discover Annie’s pjs, covered in blood.

Gilmore girls creep

Shawn gets freaked out and calls Juliet O’Hara from the SBPD to come down and check things out. She gets everyone to stay inside the cabin.  When Jason leaves, Shawn chases after him. As he is running and looking for him, he notices the laundry room going again. He goes inside and finds Annie’s strangled body. After that, a man in a potato bag (like that in Butterfinger the 13th) chases after him. Shawn screams and runs away.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Only to be caught by the killer!

Tuedaythe17th

But all is not what it seems. Shawn figures out that Jason is behind it all and that it is merely a camp created to scare people. The counselors are actors. People pay to come and get scared out of their minds. It’s like living a horror movie, except you know you will survive in the end.

So everyone goes back to the cabin and celebrates the “rehearsal” of the event.

Tuesdaythe17th

Everything is great until Shawn spots a dead body in the pond.

Victim #2

Victim #1

They all pull him out and discover that it is the creepy janitor. There is a huge storm that starts up, causing no to be able to leave. Or come to them.

dun-dun-duuuun

All have to wait until it blows over. They decide to play strip cribbage, as stupid as the strip monopoly they play in Friday the 13th.

Well I don't make out alive. Must have been too much strip monopoly.

Well I don’t make out alive. Must have been too much strip monopoly.

Billy ends up being the one who looses all his clothes. And you know what that means…..Yep let the bodies hit the floor.

After the janitor, Annie is killed and then Billy when he goes to check the breaker after the lights go out.

Shawn figures out that it is Clive and goes after Billy, finding his dead body. Juliet chases Annie down and discovers that she is dead too. They go looking for Clive and find him fighting with Gus. One gets knocked into the pool and Shawn jumps into the pool thinking it was Gus. It’s not, it’s Clive!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Clive tries to attack Shawn, letting him know that the reason he is doing so is because his father died at this camp and he wanted to get revenge.

Pamela Voorhees: [high voice] Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! Don't let her get away, Mommy! Don't let her live!  [normal voice]  Pamela Voorhees: I won't, Jason. I won't!

Very similar to the orginal Friday the 13th film

Luckily Juliet manages to shoot him before he can harm Shawn.

tumblr_nbzk97FFx11t9pwxfo1_500 tumblr_nbzk97FFx11t9pwxfo2_500

The episode ends with Shawn, Gus, and Juliet looking off into the distance. Thinking about the horror they’ve witnessed.

Tueadaythe17th

You know how the original Friday the 13th ended, with Jason coming out of the water? Well, they parodied that too, except with Rock Astley.

Tuesday17th

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even A Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to Part X: The Movie List that Would Not Die!

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For more on Psych, go to At the End of the Rainbow

For more Friday the 13th (1980), go to Camp Blood

For more on Shawn Spencer, go to Treat Her Right

For more parodies of horror films, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?

For more on summer camp, go to Someone Very Special

For more of my fav songs, go to It’s Happening Again, Isn’t It?

Part X: The Movie List That Would Not Die

 

Horror Films

901)”Dr. Ross Jennings: Respect is fine, but actually I’ve always wanted to be feared.”–Arachnophobia (1990)

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902)”Cathy Brenner: He [Mitch] has a client now who shot his wife in the head six times. Six times! Can you imagine it? I mean, even twice would be overdoing it, don’t you think?”–The Birds (1963)

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903) “Brody: You’re gonna need a bigger boat.”–Jaws (1975)

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904)”Madeleine: Here I was born, and there I died. It was only a moment for you; you took no notice.”–Vertigo (1958)

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905)”Roger Thornhill: I didn’t realize you were an art collector. I thought you just collected corpses.”–North by Northwest (1959)

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906)”Roderick Fitzgerald: [narration] They call them the haunted shores, these stretches of Devonshire and Cornwall and Ireland which rear up against the westward ocean. Mists gather here… and sea fog… and eerie stories…”–The Uninvited (1944)

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907)”Prof. Gerald Deemer: The history of medicine is the history of the unusual.”–Tarantula (1955)

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908)”Earl Bassett: Run for it? Running’s not a plan! Running’s what you do, once a plan fails!”–Tremors (1990)

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909)”Steve Andrews: How do you get people to protect themselves from something they don’t believe in?”–The Blob (1959)

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910)”Mary Shelley: It’s a perfect night for mystery and horror. The air itself is filled with monsters.”–The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

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911)”Harrison Hill: A very famous man once said that sincerity is everything. Once you learn to fake that, the rest is easy.”–Perfect Stranger (2007)

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912) “Johnny: They’re coming to get you, Barbara.” –Night of the Living Dead (1968)

Night of the living dead zombie

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913)”Dr. Frankenstein: I am going to turn you into a mindless zombie. Have you ever seen a mindless zombie?
Alvin Seville: Are you kidding? I live in Hollywood!”–Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein (1999)

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914)”Burt Robeson: I spy, with my lttle eye, something that starts with C.

Vicky: Corn.”–Children of the Corn (1984)

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915)”Stephanie ‘Steve’ Clayton: You make it sound so creepy.
Dr. Matt Hastings: The unknown always is.”–Tarantula (1955)

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1616)”Carl Denham: And now, ladies and gentlemen, before I tell you any more, I’m going to show you the greatest thing your eyes have ever beheld. He was a king and a god in the world he knew, but now he comes to civilization merely a captive- a show to gratify your curiosity. Ladies and gentlemen, look at Kong, the Eighth Wonder of the World.”–King Kong (1933)

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917) “Ro: It’s a world where you *think* actions have no consequence, where guilt is cloaked by anonymity, where there are no fingerprints. An invisible universe filled with strangers, interconnected online and disconnected in life. It will steal your secrets, corrupt your dreams, and co-opt your identity. Because in this world, where you can be anything you want, any *one* you want, you just might lose sight of who you are.”–Perfect Stranger (2007)

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918)”Fred Krueger: I’m your boyfriend now, Nancy.”–Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

EW!

EW!

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919) “Burt: Any religion without love and compassion is false! It’s a lie!”-Children of the Corn (1984)

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920)”Debbie Jellinsky: I don’t wanna hurt anybody. I don’t enjoy hurting anybody. I don’t like guns, or bombs, or electric chairs. But sometimes people just won’t listen. And so, I have to use persuasion. And slides. [Showing slide pictures] My parents, Sharon and Dave. Generous, doting, or *were they*? All I ever wanted was a Ballerina Barbie. In her pretty pink tutu. My birthday. [the slide shows her as a child, smiling and opening a gift] I was 10, and do you know what they got me? *Malibu* Barbie.

Morticia: Malibu Barbie.

Gomez: The nightmare.

Morticia: The nerve.

Debbie Jellinsky: [flicks to the next slide of her throwing a bared-teeth temper tantrum] That’s not what I wanted! That’s not who I was. I was a *ballerina*, graceful, delicate! They had to go. [the next slide shot shows a burning house].

Bad things happen when you don't listen

Bad things happen when you don’t listen

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921)”The Monster: Alone: bad. Friend: good!”–The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

The-Bride-of-Frankenstein-006

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922)”Dr. Jekyll: I have no soul. I’m beyond the pale. I’m one of the living dead!”–Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

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923) “Alice: The boy. Is he dead, too?

Tierney: Who?

Alice: The boy. Jason.

Tierney: Jason?

Alice: In the lake, the one – the one who attacked me – the one who pulled me underneath the water.

Tierney: Ma’am, we didn’t find any boy.

Alice: But – then he’s still out there.”–Friday the 13th (1980)

Alice: The boy. Is he dead, too?  Tierney: Who?  Alice: The boy. Jason.  Tierney: Jason?  Alice: In the lake, the one - the one who attacked me - the one who pulled me underneath the water.  Tierney: Ma'am, we didn't find any boy.  Alice: But - then he's still out there.

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924)”Hooper: I’m not going to waste my time arguing with a man who’s lining up to be a hot lunch.”–Jaws (1975)

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925)”Walter Chang: Earl. Here’s some swiss cheese and some bullets.”–Tremors (1990)

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926)”Morticia: Wednesday’s at that very special age when a girl has only one thing on her mind.

Ellen: Boys?

Wednesday: Homicide.”–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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927)”The Monster: [Speaking to Frankenstein and Elizabeth] Go you live [turning to Dr.Pretorius] You stay we belong dead.”–The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

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928)”Simon: Aren’t you afraid this will rot your brain?
Alvin: Too late.”–Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet the Wolfman (2000)

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929)”Quint: But it’s not gonna be pleasant. I value my neck a lot more than three thousand bucks, chief. I’ll find him for three, but I’ll catch him, and kill him, for ten. But you’ve gotta make up your minds. If you want to stay alive, then ante up. If you want to play it cheap, be on welfare the whole winter. I don’t want no volunteers, I don’t want no mates, there’s just too many captains on this island. $10,000 for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole d*** thing.”–Jaws (1975)

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930)”Children: One, two, Freddy’s coming for you. Three, four, better lock your door. Five, six, grab your crucifix. Seven, eight, gonna stay up late. Nine, ten, never sleep again.”–Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

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931)”Police Lieutenant: Well, Denham, the airplanes got him.
Carl Denham: Oh no, it wasn’t the airplanes. It was beauty killed the beast.”–King Kong (1933)

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932)”Morticia: [confronting Debbie in her house] You have gone too far. You have married Fester, you have destroyed his spirit, you have taken him from us. All that I could forgive. But Debbie…

Debbie Jellinsky: What?

Morticia: …pastels?”–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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933)”Lucas: I can tell you something about this place. The boys around here call it “The Black Lagoon”; a paradise. Only they say nobody has ever come back to prove it.”–The Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)

Love Triangle!

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934)”Angela Dodson: I guess God has a plan for all of us.”–Constantine (2005)

GodhasaPlan

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935)”Brody: I used to hate the water…
Hooper: I can’t imagine why.”–Jaws (1975)

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936)”Steve Karnes: I feel Admiral, what we’re facing is a marine animal of tremendous size and strength.

Admiral Summers: Do you mean to believe that a whale could’ve smashed through steel plates so high above the water line?

Steve Karnes: I didn’t say a whale.

Professor James Bickford: Behemoth?

Steve Karnes: That’s as good a name as any for now.”–The Giant Behemoth (1959)

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1637)”Wednesday: [as an Pocahontas ad-libbing during a Thanksgiving play] Wait!

Amanda: What?

Wednesday: We cannot break bread with you.

Amanda: Huh? Becky, what’s going on?

Becky: [whispered] Wednesday!

Wednesday: You have taken the land which is rightfully ours. Years from now my people will be forced to live in mobile homes on reservations. Your people will wear cardigans, and drink highballs. We will sell our bracelets by the road sides, you will play golf, and enjoy hot hors d’oeuvres. My people will have pain and degradation. Your people will have stick shifts. The gods of my tribe have spoken. They have said, “Do not trust the Pilgrims, especially Sarah Miller.”

Amanda: Gary, she’s changing the words.

Wednesday: And for all these reasons I have decided to scalp you and burn your village to the ground.–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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938)”Mr. Hyde: So, you’re the great Van Helsing.

Van Helsing: And you’re a deranged psychopath.

Mr. Hyde: We all have our little problems.”–Van Helsing (2004)

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939)”Angela Dodson: Well, this has been real educational, but… I don’t believe in the devil.
John Constantine: You should. He believes in you.”–Constantine (2005)

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940)”Hooper: Ha, ha – they’re all gonna die.”–Jaws (1975)

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941) “Nancy: Whatever you do don’t fall asleep.”–Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

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942)”Burt: [about the Bible] What, did you rewrite the whole thing, or just the parts that don’t suit your needs?”–Children of the Corn (1984)

 

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943)Frank Whemple: Had to! Science, you know. Well after we’d worked among her things, I felt as if I’d known her. But when we got the wrappings off, and I saw her face… you’ll think me silly, but I sort of fell in love with her.

Helen Grosvenor: Do you have to open graves to find girls to fall in love with?”–The Mummy (1932)

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944)”Mr. Hyde: Think before you decide, I tell you! Do you want to be left as you are, or do you want your eyes and your soul to be blasted by a sight that would stagger the devil himself?”–Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

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945)”Officer Burroughs: Jill, Jill. We traced the call! It’s coming from inside the house! Do you hear me? It’s coming from inside the house! You need to get out! Jill?”–When a Stranger Calls (2006)

When-a-Stranger-Calls-s01

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946)Anna Valerious: I think if you’re going to kill somebody, kill them! Don’t stand around talking about it!”–Van Helsing (2004)

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947)”Bill: Sweetheart, you can’t buy the necessities of life with cookies.”–Edward Scissorhands (1990)

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948)”Richard Hannay: Beautiful, mysterious woman pursued by gunmen. Sounds like a spy story.
Annabella Smith: That’s exactly what it is.”–The 39 Steps (1935)

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949″Jenny Williams: Even a man who is pure in heart and says his prayers by night, may become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms and the autumn moon is bright.”–The Wolf Man (1941)

wolfman

 

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950)”Jill Johnson: Tiffany, I know it’s you. I can see your name on Caller ID, genius.

Voice of the Stranger: This isn’t Tiffany.”–When a Stranger Calls (2006)

Oh Crap! [Note: Pic from When a Stranger Calls not Phantoms]

Oh Crap!

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951)”Van Helsing: My life… my job… my curse… is to vanquish evil.”–Van Helsing (2004)

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952)”Mary Henry: It’s funny… the world is so different in the daylight. In the dark, your fantasies get so out of hand. But in the daylight everything falls back into place again.”–Carnival of Souls (1962)

Carnival of Souls

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953) “Tony Wendice: [to Mark] People don’t commit murder on credit.”–Dial “M” for Murder (1954)

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954)Sheriff Watson: And this bullet stuck among the hymns, eh? Well, I’m not surprised Mr. Hannay. Some of those hymns are terrible hard to get through.”–The 39 Steps (1935)

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955)”Hannibal Lecter: [on telephone] I do wish we could chat longer, but… I’m having an old friend for dinner. Bye.

Clarice Starling: Dr. Lecter?… Dr. Lecter?… Dr. Lecter?… Dr. Lecter?…”–The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

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956)”Doctor Muller: Burn the scroll, man. Burn it! It was through you this horror came into existence.”–The Mummy (1932)

the mummy

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957)”Minister: You cannot live in isolation from the human race, you know.”–Carnival of Souls (1962)

Carnival of Souls

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958)”Morticia: [to Gomez] I’m just like any modern woman trying to have it all. Loving husband, a family. It’s just, I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade.”–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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959)”Steve Karnes: [solemnly] One thing is sure. Something has happened here that isn’t in the book. Something came out of the ocean and now has gone back into.”–The Giant Behemoth (1959)

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960)”Sheriff Leigh Brackett: It’s Halloween, everyone’s entitled to one good scare.”–Halloween (1979)

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961)”Hannibal Lecter: Well, Clarice – have the lambs stopped screaming?”–Silence of the Lambs (1991)

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962)”Gomez: [to Fester] You’ll meet someone. Someone very special. Someone who won’t press charges.”–The Addams’ Family (1993)

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963)”Tom Trevethan: From the sea… burning, like fire!

John: What was it?

Tom Trevethan: Behemoth!”–The Giant Behemoth (1959)

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964)”Verden Fell: The eyes, they confound me. There’s a blankness, a mindless sort of malice in some Egyptian. They do not readily yield up the mystery.”–The Tomb of Ligeia (1964)

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965)”Don Nicholas Medina: You will die in agony. Die!”–The Pit and the Pendulum (1961)

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966)”Chip Douglas: You know what the trouble about real life is? There’s no danger music.”–The Cable Guy (1996)

thememusic

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967)”Debbie Jellinsky: [meeting Gomez] Isn’t he a lady killer!

Gomez: Acquitted.”–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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968)”Maleva: Whoever is bitten by a werewolf and lives becomes a werewolf himself.”–The Wolf Man (1941)

Wolf Man 1941 5

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969)”Fred Wilson: Lights! Camera! Kong!”–King Kong (1976)

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970)”Hannibal Lecter: A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.”-Silence of the Lambs (1991)

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971)” Morticia: My baby is ill, and my husband is dying. Oh Mama, what shall I do?

Grandma: Well, you have a black dress.”–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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972) “R: [voice-over, introducing M] This is my best friend. By best friend, I mean we occasionally grunt and stare awkwardly at each other. We even have almost conversations sometimes.”–Warm Bodies (2013)

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973)”Doctor Lloyd: I believe a man lost in the mazes of his own mind may imagine that he’s anything.”–The Wolf Man (1941)

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974)”Beni: [after a shipwreck] Hey, O’Connell! It looks to me like I’ve got all the horses!

Rick: Hey, Beni! Looks to me like you’re on the wrong side of the river!”–The Mummy (1999)

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975)”Jame “Buffalo Bill” Gumb: It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.”–Silence of the Lambs (1991)

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976)”Gomez: [at the police station after asking to arrest Debbie. *Shouting*] Has the planet gone mad? My brother, passion’s hostage. I seek justice – denied! I shall not submit! I shall conquer! I shall rise! My name is Gomez Addams, and I have seen evil! [Grandma waves Pubert in the air] I have seen horror! [Lurch waves]I have seen the unholy maggots which feast in the dark recesses of the human soul!

Morticia: They’re at camp.

Gomez: I have seen all this, officer. But until today, I had never seen… *you*!

Desk sergeant: Hook him, book him, cook him. *Now*!

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977)”Kevin: Hey.

R: [voice-over] *Say something human. Say something human.* How… are… you…? [voice-over] *Nailed it.*

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978)”Sir John Talbot: You policemen are always in such a hurry. As if dead men didn’t have all eternity.”–The Wolf Man (1941)

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979)”Evelyn: [Upon opening the tomb] I’ve dreamt about this since I was a little girl.

Rick: You dream about dead guys?”–The Mummy (1999)

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980)”Evelyn: No harm ever came from opening a chest

Rick: Yeah, right, and no harm ever came from reading a book. You remember how that one went?”–The Mummy Returns (2001)

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981)”Debbie Jellinsky: My first husband, the heart surgeon. All day long, coronaries, transplants.

Grandma: What about your needs?

Debbie Jellinsky: “Sorry about dinner, Deb. The Pope has a cold.” [the next slide shows a shadow of an axe on the wall heading towards the Surgeon]

Grandma: An axe! That takes me back.”–The Addams’ Family (1993)

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982)”R: [voice-over] Don’t be creepy. Don’t be creepy. Don’t be creepy.”–Warm Bodies (2013)

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983)”Larry Talbot: It isn’t a wolf… it’s a werewolf!”–The Wolf Man (1941)

wolfman-strangle

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84)”Mort: [voiceover] ‘I know I can do it,’ Todd Downey said, helping himself to another ear of corn from the steaming bowl. ‘I’m sure that in time, every bit of her will be gone and her death will be a mystery… even to me.”–Secret Window (2004)

He stole my story!

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985)”Evelyn: Look, I… I may not be an explorer, or an adventurer, or a treasure-seeker, or a gunfighter, Mr. O’Connell, but I am proud of what I am.

Rick: And what is that?

Evelyn: I… am a librarian.”–The Mummy (1999)

Librarian

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986)”Rick: [witnessing Imhotep’s resurrection] You know, a couple of years ago, this would have seemed really strange to me.”–The Mummy Returns (2001)

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987)”Debbie Jellinsky: Husband number two. The senator. He loved his state, he loved his country!

Grandma: What about Debbie?

Debbie Jellinsky: “Sorry Debbie, no Mercedes this year. We have to set an example.” Oh yeah? Set this![the next slide shows car headlights heading towards the Senator in panic]”–The Addams’ Family (1993)

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988)”Rick: Are you sure you want to be playing around with this thing?

Evelyn: It’s just a book. No harm ever came from reading a book.”–The Mummy (1999)

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89)”Mort: You know, the only thing that matters is the ending. It’s the most important part of the story, the ending. And this one… is very good. This one’s perfect.”–Secret Window (2004)

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990)”R: [voice-over] They call these guys Bonies. They don’t bother us much, but they’ll eat anything with a heartbeat. I mean, I will too, but at least I’m conflicted about it.”–Warm Bodies (2013)

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991)”Ardeth Bay: There is a fine line between coincidence and fate.”–The Mummy Returns (2001)

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992)”Debbie Jellinsky: But with your looks, your charm… women must follow you everywhere!

Uncle Fester: Store detectives.”–Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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993)”Dorian Gray: If only it was the picture who was to grow old, and I remain young. There’s nothing in the world I wouldn’t give for that. Yes, I would give even my soul for it.”–The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945)

Ivan Le Lorraine Albright's famous painting of the decayed Dorian Gray - which took approximately one year to complete - is now owned by the Art Institute of Chicago, where it has been on display for many years.

Ivan Le Lorraine Albright’s famous painting of the decayed Dorian Gray – which took approximately one year to complete – is now owned by the Art Institute of Chicago, where it has been on display for many years.

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994)”Mort: I don’t respond well to intimidation. Makes me feel *icky*.”–Secret Window (2004)

secret window

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95)”Norville ‘Shaggy’ Rogers: [as two female zombies approach him and Scooby-Doo] Like… we’re not looking for any ghoul-friends, are we, Scooby?”–Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island (1998)

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996)”John Proctor: Because it is my name! Because I cannot have another in my life! Because I lie and sign myself to lies! Because I am not worth the dust on the feet of them you have hanged! How may I live without my name? I have given you my soul; leave me my name!”–The Crucible (1996)

How may I live without my name? I have given you my soul; leave me my name!

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997)”Rick: I only gamble with my life, never my money.”–The Mummy (1999)

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998)”Ardeth Bay: If a man does not embrace his past, he has no future.”–The Mummy Returns (2001)

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999)”Morticia: Children, do you think we love the baby more than we love you?

WednesdayPugsley: Yes.

Morticia: Do you think that when a new baby arrives, one of the other children has to die?

WednesdayPugsley: Yes.

Grandma: Well, that’s just not true. [sighs] Not anymore.”–The Addams’ Family Values (1993)

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100)”Daphne Blake: What I need is a real, live ghost.

Velma Dinkley: That’s an oxymoron, Daph.”–Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island (1998)

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to I Was Here For A Moment. And Then I Was Gone

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For more of my fav movie lines, go to Part IX: Adventures in Movie Lines

For more on The 39 Steps (1935), go to Part VIII:The Little Movie Line List

For more on The Addam’s Family Values, go to Someone Very Special

For more on Arachnophobia, go to When the Itsy-Bitsy Spider is No Longer Itsy-Bitsy

For more on The Bride of Frankenstein, go to I Want Friend Like Me

For more on Carnival of Souls, go to I Don’t Belong in the World

For more on Children of the Corn, go to He Who Walks Behind the Rows

For more on The Creature from the Black Lagoon and The Silence of the Lambs, go to Disnified Horror

For more on The Crucible, go to I Saw Goody Osburn With the Devil

For more on Edward Scissorhands, go to 25 Films of Christmas

For more on Frankenstein, go to My Favorite Movie Lines

For more on Friday the 13th (1980), go to Camp Blood

For more on The Giant Behemoth, go to From the Sea Burning Like Fire

For more on Jaws, go to For All the Men Who Wonder What It’s Like

For more on The Mummy (1932), go to Eternal Punishment for Anyone Who Opens This Casket

For more on Night of the Living Dead, go to They’re Coming To Get You Barbara

For more on Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), go to Whatever You Do Don’t Fall Asleep

For more on North by Northwest, go to Part VII: It Was Said One Night

For more on Perfect Stranger, go to Secrets are Great, Unless You Get Caught

For more on The Picture of Dorian Gray, go to If Only It Was the Picture Who Was to Grow Old, and I Remain Young

For more on The Secret Window, go to The Only Thing That Matters is the Ending

For more on Warm Bodies, go to Say Something Human

For more information on When a Stranger Calls, go to It’s Coming From Inside the House


horror films

It’s Happening Again, Isn’t It?: Scream 2 (1997)

scream-2

It’s happening again, isn’t it?

So welcome to another Screamin’ Saturday. Yep, every Saturday this month we are going to cover the Scream franchise. Go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie? to read about the first one.

**** Contains Spoliers ****

Now the first Scream film was a parody of horror films. Scream 2 is similar, but takes it one step further by making this a parody of horror sequels, and sequels in general. Kevin Williamson actually came up with the ideas for Scream 2 while writing the script for Scream. Scream 2 began principal photography just six months after the release of Scream, and it was released less than a year after its predecessor.

keanu Whoa

So Scream takes place two years since the last film, and Gale Weathers has not only written her book about the Woodsboro murders, but her book has been turned into a film, Stab. They are having a midnight showing for the film in which all those who attend receive a free ghostface mask + costume.

So we open with a boyfriend and girlfriend going to see the film. She’s not really into it, but her boyfriend is all over the slasher flick. The two start watching the film, when her boyfriend goes off to the bathroom. Just like in Friday the 13th, he meets his end.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Making it body #1

Victim #1

Victim #1

Back at the theater, his date is chilling, watching the film, when she too meets her end.

Victim #2

Victim #2

Everyone hears her screams, but does nothing as they think it was just a publicity stunt.

The next day we go to Windsor College, where the dead boy and girl attended school; and also the place that Randy and Sidney go to. Randy is in his film class where they are discussing whether or not violent films really encourages people to become killers. The reason this plays such a crucial role in the film, was because after the first film came out there were a ton of people trying to copy the murders and they way they killed people in the film. In fact many tried to blame it on scary movies and try to get directors like Wes Craven to be held responsible for it.

“Film Teacher: You could say that what happened in that theatre was a direct result of the movie itself.

Cici: That is so Moral Majority. You can’t blame real life violence on entertainment.

Film Class Guy #1: Yes you can. Don’t you ever watch the news?

Film Class Guy #2: Hello? The murderer was wearing a ghost mask just like in the movie. It’s directly responsible.

Cici: No, it’s not. Movies are not responsible for our actions.

Mickey: Its a classic case of life, imitating art, imitating life.

Film Class Mopey Girl: Its not hypothetical, it’s not about art. I had biology with that girl. This is reality.

Randy: Thank you. I agree with you. Let me tell you about reality, Mickey. I lived through this, okay? Life is life. It doesn’t imitate anything.

Mickey: Oh come on Randy, with all due respect, the killer obviously patterned himself after two serial killers who were immortalized on film.

Film Class Guy #2: Thank you!

Film Teacher: So, you’re suggesting that someone is trying to make a real life sequel?

Randy: Stab 2? Who would wanna do that? Sequels suck! Oh please, please! By definition alone, sequels are inferior films!

Thank you Randy!

Bad Sequels psycho-1960-alfred-hitchcock-janet-leigh-pic-21

And this spurns a debate on whether or not sequels are horrible films. I have to say that I usually hate sequels, but there are some that are better than the original, such as Aliens, or just as good, like Terminator 2.  Anyways, as they are debating, one student, Mickey, says that Godfather II is so much better than the original. Mickey you are stupid. Godfather II is no where near as awesome as the original GodfatherThe Godfather was an amazing film about this family and one man’s struggle to get free, but getting trapped in something he does not want. It is AWESOME! The second one isn’t bad, but the plot is a little scattered with the juxtaposition between Vito’s start in America, and Michael’s life. I don’t think it’s awful, but it just doesn’t hold a candle to the original. Mickey, I only have one thing to say to you:

Don't mess with me!

Don’t mess with me!

Sorry! Back to the film…

So Randy still is in love with Sidney, and I personally hate how the directors never put them together. I wanted Randy to win the girl. But sadly, that’s not in his future.

Scream 2 geek get the girl

He checks up on Sidney who is scared about everything happening again.

scream 2 start again

We are then introduced to the rest of the crew. Sidney’s new boyfriend Derek (Jerry O’Connell),  his best friend Mickey (Timothy Olyphant) and…wait a sec. Timothy Olyphant? the sexy guy from Deadwood and Justified? He’s in this film???? Woaaaaaah!! This dude is one incredible actor. He goes from yucky creep:

Uber Creep!!!

Uber Creep!!!

to:

look behind watching

Excuse me again. Sorry! And Sydney’s best friend Hallie (Elise Neal). (Funny it mimics the old crew. In Scream: Sidney, Randy, Billy, Stu, & Tatum. Scream 2: Sidney, Randy, Derek, Mickey, & Hallie. 3 boys and 2 girls). Soon to join them is Deputy Dewey, as he wants to watch over Sidney and make sure she is okay. He does suffer from a limp and other ailments, as his stabbing almost killed him. Following after him is Gale, who is once again, not received well.

verbalbeatdown

Meanwhile Sidney continues to get harassed on the phone:

when-a-stranger-calls

“Sydney: Hello? Hello?

Phone Voice: Hello Sidney.

Sydney: Yes?

Phone Voice: What’s your favorite scary movie?

Sydney: Who is this?

Phone Voice: You tell me.

Sydney: [picks up caller ID] Cory Gillis, 555-0176.

Phone Voice: S***!

Sydney: Hot flash Cory…

Phone Voice: S***!

Sydney: …prank calls are a criminal offense prosecuted under penal code 653M.

[caller hangs up]

Sydney: Hope you enjoyed the movie.”

Meanwhile, that night in a sorority house, Cici, the girl from the film class (and played by Sarah Michelle Geller) recieves a lot of phone calls and is attacked that night.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Making her

Victim #3

Victim #3

That night Sidney gets attacked by ghostface, and just manages to get out okay with Derek’s help. He saves her but gets a flesh wound in the process. She is then is given two policemen bodyguards to protect her.

The next day, Sidney is totally freaking out, as she herself also gets attacked. Derek tries to make her feel better by singing her a Partridge Family song, I Think I Love You:

This is one of my all time favorite songs! I find it so incredibly romantic!

So romantic!

So romantic!

And gives her his Greek letters for protection.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Derek NO!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Have you not seen any horror films?!!!!

princess Bride Victim to classic blunder Vizzini

 

This is why Randy is awesome, he would know about this and he would not make this stupid mistake. OMG movie heroes make this mistake all the freakin’ time. The Wolf Man, The Mummy, Draculaetc. If you have been given a necklace just for you DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT GIVE IT AWAY! IF YOU DO YOU WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Every single time! I mean it is true that this is just Greek letters and not something given by Van Helsing, or a Gypsy ,or whatever, but still. If you hadn’t given it away you wouldn’t have marked yourself as a dead man. Just saying.

Ouch

Ouch

Randy and Dewey meet up to try and figure out who the killer might be. While they are discussing it, they see clips from the film Stab. Now I do have to say I love the movie within the movie as they show scenes from the film. And good job Wes on continuity. In Scream, Sidney mentions how she wouldn’t be lucky to have a great actress play her, she’d probably end up with Tori Spelling.

Randy also goes over the rules for sequels.

And also discusses our potential killers. Is it Derek, the boyfriend? Could Sydney have made the same mistake twice? How about creepy Mickey? Or the supposedly sweet Hallie?

Everyone's a suspect!

Everyone’s a suspect!

Sidney, meanwhile is suffering from PTSD. She is supposed to be the star of the school play, but has a complete breakdown in rehearsal.

And this is something that makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. I know Wes did it this way so that when Ghostface is attacking her she can go all loca, but still who would ever be in a play where people in freakin’ masks are attacking you? There is no way whatsoever that someone with that much trauma would dare even do that. I’m sorry, but I just don’t believe it.

You-serious?-Not-happening-babe!

Now I want to take a brief sidebar from the film (I know again…sorry!) But let me just say that I love how this film is such a great representation of the ’90s. You have that one side of the culture with the dark clothing very goth (Sidney and Gale). And on the other hand you have the prep look with floral and pastels (Derek and Hallie). You have everyone running around in denim, stonewash of course. Ah, it’s such a throwback. They even give a Saved By the Bell reference, and call each other bonehead. Oh ’90s.

Sidney_&_Friends Scream 2

Anyways back to the film. So Randy, Dewey, and Gale have now teamed up to try and find the killer. Poor Randy. He loves Sidney so much, but she won’t give him the time of day. Now I cannot understand why Sidney won’t date Randy. Randy is awesome. He has great taste in film. He is tall and buff. He does a great British accent. Why Sid? Why? He’s perfect.

perfection

So they get a call, and while Randy talks to ghostface, Dewey and Gale hunt around the area trying to find the murderer.

Victim #4

Victim #4

RANDY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

padme-youre-breaking-my-heart-gif-1

Why, why why!!!!!! Why did Randy have to die? Why?????????!!!!!!!!! Just like the garage scene was the biggest mistake of Scream, killing Randy was the biggest mistake you could make for the sequel. Randy was awesome. Randy was hot. Randy was the only one who had seen horror films. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

right in the feels broken heart

So Sidney, even though her life is threatened, has schoolwork to do. She goes to the library and her guards go to the other side of the building.

SayWhat?

MeanGirls I know right!

WHY AREN’T THEY NEXT TO HER?

Then Sidney gets threatened and her bodyguards take off to investigate.

Say What

So what is up with Sidney’s bodyguards? Do they want her to die? She gets threatened and they live her alone to investigate. SHE WAS JUST THREATENED!!!!! DO YOU WANT HER TO DIE??????? Ugh! One of you should have stayed while the other went out looking.

hmm_yes_i_see_youre_a_moron_trollcat

While they are gone Cotton Weary comes onto Sidney. I’m sure you guys remember Cotton. He was played by Liev Schreiber, and was the man that Sidney thought had murdered her mother. He had been released after the whole Stu & Billy issue. He’s been trying to reach Sidney to have her go on TV with him and discuss the past, but she has been ignoring him.

Scream 2 Doubts

Okay Cotton is a real creep. The way he just pops out of nowhere and how he is obsessed with Sidney, I’m having Phantoms flashbacks. Let me just say that I don’t like Liev Schieber. I think he is creepy in everything! (Well except Kate & Leopold). 

Certified Creepo Ribbon

So after that they decide to take Sydney and Hallie to a safe house. She stops to say good-bye to Derek, but it turns out he gets kidnapped by his frat brothers as he is going to get a beat down for giving away his letters.

post-32452-this-is-a-fight-gif-we-are-fig-xWvc

Okay this is a weird scene. Seriously what is with all the Troy references? They are doing a Greek tragedy about Troy as their school play. The Greek frat/Sorority yells about how this is for Troy and call themselves gods. Who talks like that? What is their obsession with Troy in this film?

whatsthedeal

Anyways, so the four of them are on their way to a safe house, when Sydney asks the cops where they are going. They tell her that they can’t, because if they tell her, then they’ll have to kill her.

Ryan-Gosling-Oh-No-You-Didnt-Half-Nelson

Sydney is being threatened BY A KILLER AND YOU THINK MAKING A JOKE ABOUT KILLING HER IS FUNNY?

jerk_alert32

Like dude really? Bad form, bad form

Darcy P&P OMG Can't Even

I mean like

Get out

Anyways, back to the film.

So as they are driving they get attacked by Ghostface.

Ghostface attacks!

Ghostface attacks!

Now this makes no sense to me. How did Ghostface know where they were going? I mean they were taking her to a secure location, a safe house, yet he reaches the intersection way before them. I mean he could have guessed they would exit and go down that way, but every campus has at least four exits, how did he know they weren’t going to double back? And how did he make it there on foot? And what was his plan if they didn’t happen to get a red light? I mean he is on foot, and they will be driving at least 35m/hr, maybe faster.

Shame on you!

Shame on you!

So the two take a really long time, trying to get out of the car without disturbing ghostface. They make it out and start running away. When Sidney decides to go back and take a look at who the killer is.

No thank you

This isn’t the time to stay there, this is the time to RUN AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Scream 2

She goes back, but the killer has magically disappeared and kills Hallie. Bringing our total to:

Victim #5, 6, & 7

Victim #5, 6, & 7

The body count is racking up!

Sidney, finally takes the right advice and runs away, toward the theater/film department/building.

run-away

Meanwhile, Gale and Dewey go are in the theater to check out the film department and look at some tapes.

Ringu Watch TV

While their things get a little heated. Now Dewey and Gale, tsk. tsk. What is this Twin Peaks? You are going to sex while there is a killer loose?

clueless twin peaks

But they get interrupted by a tape that shows images from Cici’s murder, Randy’s, and then the two of them. Ghostface then chases them around stabbing Dewey in the process. Now Gale manages to outrun him for quite a while and it is  pretty B.A. how Gale is attacking and trying to take Ghostface down. The whole chase scene with Gale and the killer is very reminiscent of Jurassic Park. The raptors and Ghostface could be best buds.

27c_jurassic-park-image-4

Sidney has reached the stage, where she sees Derek tied up. She goes to help him when ghostface comes upon her and reveals himself to be……….

dun-dun-duuuun

Uber Creep!!!

Uber Creep!!!

Mickey

Yep, Mickey is crazy and the killer. He tells Sidney that he isn’t working alone, but has a partner.

“Mickey: Don’t you know, history repeats itself? Hmm, Sid? [removes mask to reveal Mickey; uses voice-changer] Surprise, Sidney.

Derek: What the f***?

Mickey: Since Derek here disappeared on my a**, I’ve been on my own, all f****** night. Thanks a lot, partner.

Derek: You motherf*****! Sid, you know me better than that. Untie me.

Sydney: Oh my god, Derek!

Derek: No, no, no… Sid.

Mickey: It’s okay, Derek. We got her.

Derek: No, no, Sid, listen to me. You know me better than that. He’s lying.

Mickey: What do you think, Derek? Sidney’s experiencing a little deja vu?

Derek: Sid, he’s lying! The man is lying! Sid, untie me! Untie me!”

So now Sidney is caught between the two. Could she have made the same mistake?

What else could go wrong?

What to do

Before Sidney can make a decision Mickey shoots Derek in the chest. Bringing us to:

Victim #8

Victim #8

Mickey: You should really deal with your trust issues Sid: I mean, poor Derek. He’s completely innocent and such a nice boy too. He’s bright and funny and handsome. Decent singing voice. And he was going to be a doctor. This is just the kinda boy you’d like to take home to mom. If you had a mom.”

Mickey tells Sidney to look behind her and she his partner. She does and it is Gale

What the

But behind Gale is another reporter who had been around earlier, Debbie Salt. The women who Sidney recognizes as Mrs. Loomis, Billy’s mom.

OMG

Now what’s really interesting about Scream 2 is that the cast didn’t know who the killer was until the last day. They had kept it a big secret and had actually gone through multiple endings with different killers. Everyone from Derek, Hallie, Mrs. Loomis, and Cotton; before settling on the deadly duo of Mickey and Mrs. Loomis.

Anyways, so Billy’s mom and Mickey have been working together. Mickey wanted to kill because he wanted to get caught and use horror films as his defense at trial. Mrs. Loomis, shoots Mickey who shoots Gale and knocks her off the stage. She then turns to Sidney and explains her real reasons behind it all. Pulling a Mrs. Voorhees, she wants to get back at the person who killed her son.

Pamela Voorhees: [high voice] Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! Don't let her get away, Mommy! Don't let her live! [normal voice] Pamela Voorhees: I won't, Jason. I won't!

Pamela Voorhees: [high voice] Kill her, Mommy! Kill her! Don’t let her get away, Mommy! Don’t let her live!
[normal voice] I won’t, Jason. I won’t!

After Mrs. Voor…Loomis is about to slit Sidney’s throat, when Cotton comes on the scene.

I love this ending. Even though Cotton is a total creep and this is the meanest thing ever, I just love that he blackmails her into giving him the interview.

Gale is alive and after she joins the group. Mickey seems to wake up, but Sidney shoots both Mickey and Mrs. Precott.

Gale-Randy-Billy-and-Sidney-scream-23148646-499-198

Dewey is alive and gets taken to the hospital and Cotton gets his interview as the hero of the night.

TheEnd_Title_2

So tell me Wes Craven, how does Dewey survive another extreme stabbing and live? How does he live and not Randy? Randy is awesome, why’d he have to die? Why. I’m still not over that. Wes Craven you break my heart.

Wes Craven and I

Wes Craven and I

Tune in next Saturday for the third installment

1997_scream-2

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to Happily Ever Aftermath

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For more on the Scream saga, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?

For more on Wes Craven, go to Kruegar Town

For more horror parody, go to A Deliciously Creepy Tale

For more on slasher film, go to It’s Coming From Inside the House

For more on Friday the 13th, go to Camp Blood

For more great sequels, go to The Boys Are Back in Town

For more films that spanned sequels, go to I’ll Be Back

For more of my fav songs, go to Rock You Like a Hurricane