You’re Mother is a Shadowhunter…Like You: The Mortal Instruments, City of Bones (2013)

I don’t understand what any of this has to do with my mom.

Your mother was a shadowhunter, like him; like you.

So about a year ago, I read the book City of Bones (Shadowhunters: The Mortal Instruments #1) by Cassandra Clare. I decided to read it as it is SUPER popular at the library. The book is returned and gets checked out as soon as it is shelved.

After I finished it…I was not pleased at all and I could not get the appeal.

It kind of felt like a mashup between Supernatural and Harry Potter. And it MOST definitely was not better than The Hunger Games. 

Seriously, they thought that?!

It was an okay story, but it went overload on the cultural references. Like these kids are into fantasy and Scifi, I get it-but when you just reference or quote things constantly to fill in your story instead of developing the characters-that’s where I have issues.

Not for me.

Plus I found the character Simon, Clary’s best friend, to be super annoying, and I wanted her to end up with Jace the shadowhunter she meets-as the author is constantly putting them together, but it turns out that they are brother and sister?

I mean why would you construct a story that way to want two characters to get together and then be all, psych they are brother and sister.

Why, why would you do that. Ugh, it made me feel disgusting after reading it.

Or are they? Could Valentine be lying?

Hmm…is it her?

Yeah, not interested in reading more…

So I was scrolling through my streaming sites, and the film popped up and I thought, why not? There was nothing else on. Let’s see how they did the film.

Hmm…

So Clary Fray (Lily Collins) is a normal 16-year old. She lives with her mother as her father passed away years ago. Her family is rounded out by her best friend Simon, who has a huge crush on her that she can’t see, and her mother’s best friend Luke Garroway (Aiden Turner).

Wait, what?

AIDEN TURNER is in this?

For those of you who don’t know-Aiden Turner is an Irish actor who is immensely talented and has the best looking curly hair I have ever seen. I became a fan of him and his hair after watching Poldark, so I was excited. As I said, it’s been over a year since I read the book, but I do remember Luke playing a crucial role in the end of the book and I couldn’t wait to see Aiden Turner.

Clary and Simon go out to a coffee poetry night. Clary sees this “hot” blonde guy and decides to be spontaneous and go to the club he is going to. To be fair it wasn’t just because of the guy-her mother has sheltered her, her whole life and tht coupled with her mom calling her again about when she will be home and her turning 16-she decides to have fun. The hot gut was the final push.

At the club she sees him with a girl and a guy and watches the group as they approach a man and kill it.

What!

She hurries away but its too late. Life has changed forever.

She has realized the “reality” of her world and its not going away. Clary gets in a fight with her mom, and later Jocelyn Fray (Lena Headey) calls Clary and warns her not to come back. Jocelyn is kidnapped and the apartment torn apart. Clary returns home, but is attacked by some wolflike creature. Jace, the boy from the club, comes and saves her.

Where is everyone?

He saves Clary and tells her the creature was a demon, as was the man the night before. Jace is a shadowhunter, shadowhunters are a race of mortals who have angelic blood. They reside in the shadow world but cross over to the mortal realm to hunt demons, vampires, werewolves, etc. Shadowhunters can only be created by being born of a shadowhunter or turned into one by The Mortal Cup.

As you have guessed it, Jocelyn is a shadowhunter, meaning that Clary is too. That is why she could see Jace and his friends and no else could. They question the neighbor, a witch, and discover that people are after the mortal cup and believe she has it.

That’s not good.

They need a ride and Simon drives her and Jace over to Luke’s to get more information. Simon is less annoying in this, but is still annoying. And surprise, surprise he hates Jace as Jace is clearly into Clary.

The actors weren’t bad but Lily Collins and the guy who plays Jace have like zero chemistry. In the book they actually connected better.

They reach the antique shop to look for Luke, and find him being beat up. He tells the two guys (the ones who kidnapped Jocelyn) that he cares nothing for the Frays and only wants the cup too. If they let him go he will be able to find it.

The crew leave him-RUDE, like geez Clary this guy was a surrogate dad and you watched him get beat up and did nothing.

So Jace knows they won’t be safe in the city and takes them to the Shadowhunter Institute. On the outside the muggles mundanes see a dilapidated broken down church, but on the inside it is a beautiful building with weapons.

There she meets Alex (Kevin Zeggers) and Isabella Lightwood, and Hodge who runs the institute. The three of the Shadowhunters are on earth because of what their parent’s did. Years ago, Valentine Morgensten’s father was killed by a werewolf and that set him on dark path. He wanted to destroy all downworlders (demons, werewolves, vampires, etc) even ones that were not breaking the law or the Accords. He was aided by the Lightwoods and intended on starting the killing when the next Accord signing was set up. They were stopped and punishment ended up with them being sent from Idris, their home in the Shaddoworld to New York City. Later Jace was sent to live with them. Hodge on the other hand is banished to never be able to return to Idris.

Valentine was experimenting with The Mortal Cup to become more powerful, but he was believed to be dead. With them searching for the cup and coming after Jocelyn, he must have returned.

That’s not good.

Hodge tells Jace to take Clary to the Silent Brothers so they can reveal her memories. When she gets there she discovers that there is a lock on her memories only one person could do that-Magnus Bane.

Magnus Bane is the high Warlock in the area and is just happening to be throwing a killer party. Of course poor Clary knows nothing about fashion and wears boring clothes so we have a makeover by Isabella.

After the makeover all the boys are upset- Jace has been struck by cupid, Simon is mad that Jace is into Clary, and Alec has a thing for Jace and doesn’t like that he is into Clary.

They head to the party and Clary goes off with Magnus. Magnus tells her that her mother wanted to keep her safe and used to take her to appointments regularly. It was getting harder for the block to stay as she growing older and they missed the latest appointment which was to be on her birthday. Magnus tells her he can’t do anything but that without the last session in time everything and all her powers will develop.

Well, thanks for that I guess.

Well that was a useless detour-except Simon gets kidnapped as he is turned into mouse and stolen by vampires. The gang has to go after him and fight, only surviving when they are saved by werwolves.

So about here I was checked out of the film. I like that they had pared down the pop culture references but to be honest this movie is really boring. It was just too much like things you’d seen before you know. I wouldn’t be able to give specifics but it was like a large order of deja vu.

Back at the institute Simon recuperates while Jace and Clary grow closer. Clary is a prolific artists and it turns out that her Shadowhunter powers are very interesting. She can draw something and pull it off the page, or put an ordinary object on into paper. That gets her thinking…

Hmmm…

Jace, Clary, and Simon all have a spat as they are in a triangle-Simon likes Clary, and Clary likes the attention but she likes Jace who likes Clary, but Jace doesn’t like how close Clary and Simon are, etc.

Blah, blah

Clary thinks about her abilities inherited from her mom and realizes she has seen a painting by her mom of The Mortal Cup. It was on set of tarot cards her mom made or their neighbor, the witch.

Jace, Alec, Isabella, and Clary head to her neighbors to get the cup-but she is possessed by a demon. They fight and get the cup, but Alec is wounded. At the institute Isabella blames Clary as Alec is wounded badly, so badly they have to call Magnus as he is the only one who could do anything.

That’s not good.

Clary gives the cup to Hodge, who betrays them by bringing Valentine into their word-he’s been biding his time working for him, the Death Eaters, as long believed dead leader is back.

Oh, wow…

Valentine is back and played by Jonathan Rhys Meyers, oh I had a huge crush on him in the ’90s.

From Bend It Like Beckham

So Valentine reveals that he is Clary’s father. Clary has special abilities she isn’t aware of as he experimented on her when she was a fetus with angel blood and his son (her brother) with demon blood. I am really disappointed that he isn’t in the film that long and second his character is top comical. He’s chewing the scenery in every shot-and he’s not usually like this, so I blame the director.

So Clary is asked by her father to join the dark side him but she refuses, She puts the cup back in the card and travels through a portal to Luke’s. Meanwhile, Valentine bring Jocelyn to the institute and tries to figure out how to turn his daughter. Hodge comes up with the plan to lie to Jocelyn and Clary that Jace is the dead son Jonathan. I’m glad they made it clear in this that the incest is a lie-although it is still a weird plot.

Apparently, in a later book it is revealed that Valentine faked his and his older son Jonathan’s death and took the identify of Michael Wayland becoming a recluse. Michael and his wife had died, Valentine has been experimenting on Jace’s mother without her knowledge and when she died he saved the child and raised it. Jonathan had extra demon blood and Jace extra angel blood.

Hmm…

So they get to Luke’s shop and he reveals that he is a werewolf (Valentine was trying to get rid of him and took him on a hunt to get him turned into one and killed). Luke has always loved her mother and traveled with her to this world to protect her. He reveals information about Valentine and tells her that he lied to the the men torturing him to protect them. After he escaped he fought with another werewolf and gained a pack, them being the ones that saved them with the vampires.

The werewolves and few shadowhunters team up to take Valentine down.

Back at the institute, Valentine has brought demons in to help him and the Shadowhunters and werewolves do their best to fight him off. Simon discovers Jocelyn in a comalike state in the crypt of the church and tries to revive her. Valentine and Jace fight, but Jace stops when he is told that Valentine is his father.

He stops fighting, as that’s his “dad”, but Clary defeats Valentine and tricks him by giving him a fake cup ands him through the portal. Later Jace goes to see Clary and invites her back in to the Shadowhunter world-telling her he doesn’t think they are really siblings.

That doesn’t change it, still…

This wasn’t that good of a story. I think it was better in some ways than the book, but it was boring. It felt like a Star Wars, Harry Potter, Chronicles of Narnia, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer smoothie-and not in a good way. I liked Aiden Turner-although I wish he was in it more. Otherwise, meh.

For more demons, go to Suspense & Sensibility (Or First Impressions Revisited)

For more on angels, go to Book Club Picks: This Present Darkness

For more Teen Horror films, go to Just Because I’m a Vampire Doesn’t Mean I’m Bloodthirsty: Cirque du Freak, The Vampire’s Assistant (2009)

For more on Lena Headey, go to The Story, We’re Living it. It’s Alive: The Brothers Grimm (2005)

For more on Jonathan Rhys Meyers, go to Lookin’ Over a Four-Leaf Clover: 17 More Irish Heroes

Shame Book Tag

So I was just checking out what dinged on my comments and I saw I was tagged in Audra’s Book Blabbing for the Shame Book Tag. Aw, thank you for tagging:

So I was tagged like a looong time ago but its taken me forever because this is actually really hard!

Uh oh

I don’t really get embarrassed or feel ashamed-so it took some time as I had to really think and come up with an answers to these!

1. A Book that Everyone Hates but You Love

The Secret of Chimneys (Superintendent Battle #1) by Agatha Christie

So I have talked about this book before-but I just can’t stop. I LOVE it, yet everyone else seems to just feel okay about it or they can’t stand it. Why? I don’t know.

Why, not?

It is very different from Agatha Christie’s other books as it is a mystery, spy story, thriller, adventure story, and more. It actually contains five plots-yes, FIVE-that all interconnect. Missing memoirs, blackmail, a game of thrones, missing jewels, and a murder. Plus we have characters who they are one thing but are secretly something else-such as one is a prince, one a thief, one a Pinkerton agent, and one is an actress.

Plus Virginia Revel is an amazing character! Widowed, independent woman who is up for adventure, investigations, and more. She is AWESOME! Believe me!

I think some people struggle with it being so different from her other works, but I love it and completely recommend it.

For more on The Secret of Chimneys, go to Book Club Picks: The Secret Of Chimneys

For more Agatha Christie, go to The Murderer is Never the One You Initially Suspect: Crooked House (2017)

2. Unpopular Character You Love

Draco Malfoy from the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling

So Harry Potter, I’m sure you have heard of it. A boy finds out he is a Wizard and the Chosen One, and continues on a journey trying to learn magic, information on his family, and stop evil.

So I know a lot of people hate Draco Malfoy, but when I was reading it, he cracked me up. “Wait until my father hears about this!” “Potter!” I mean Harry was nice, but Draco was zesty! He’s just one of those you love to hate.

For more on Harry Potter, go to What Separates the Real Fans from the Fakes

3. A Book Boyfriend You Know You Shouldn’t Love

Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

I’ve talked about this many times, I love Wuthering Heights, it has always been one of my favorite books. The story is a man gets trapped at Wuthering Heights for the night and encounters a ghost of a woman, Catherine. He then is after the whole story and hears a tale of star crossed lovers, abuse, unhappiness, the moors, revenge, etc.

Heathcliff was one of my first book boyfriends, and even though I will always love him, I know he would be horrible in a relationship. I understand how Heathcliff feels-with no last name and known family-he is essentially without a social security card and has no way of really doing anything. However, because he is hurt, he then hurts others-and no matter what happened to him that behavior is never okay.

For more Wuthering Heights, go to Book Club Picks: Wuthering Heights

For more Heathcliff, go to One of Many

4. A Book You Know Is Bad But Still Love

Bittersweet (California Historical Series #2) by Cathy Marie Hake

So this was the hardest of all. THIS IS NOT A BAD BOOK!  Instead I chose a book that was predictable. 

Laney Harris is the daughter of a wealthy landowner. She has been in love with Galen O’Sullivan as soon as she returned from finishing school. The problem is that he sees her as nothing more than a child. She continues to do all she can, but Galen has enough on his mind with running the farm; taking care of his mother and three brothers, being in charge of the pony express horses; and a family of squatters (father and twins-brother and sister) residing on one of his acres. But one day Galen realizes that Laney is a woman and strives to win her, but before he can pop the question he is accused of impregnating the squatter’s daughter and forced to marry her. Now Laney has to live out being a Christian even when everything she wanted has been taken away. And Galen has to release the love of his life. Will the story end in happiness or only sorrow?

So this book isn’t bad, (although they talk a lot about how thin she is and pulling the stays tighter and tighter-that I consider bad) but it is predictable and some of characters are a little bland, like Laney’s sister-in-law and brother. But the story was really cute, even though you had a pretty good idea how it will end.

For more on Bittersweet, go to Top O’ the Morning: 7 More Irish Heroes

5. Underrated Author

Carrie Anne Noble

This was a really hard pick as I’m not sure which authors were in need of some serious love and was wondering who I should pick. I was looking through my books read list and I settled on Carrie Anne Noble.

I first was introduced to her with The Mermaid’s Sister, getting a free pre-release copy from Netgalley. I LOVED it and began following her on Instagram. She followed me back and let me just say her instagram is sooo cute!! 

Then she saw my Saint Patrick’s Day book display I did for library and she gifted us her book The Gold-Son. I know, how sweet and thoughtful! She didn’t ask us for anything, or to post about her, she just decided to send her book to us completely free. Of course, after she gave us the book I had to read that one too!

I think her work is fantastic and she is such a sweet person. You should check her and her books out!

6. A Book that You Don’t Want People to Know You’ve Read

Masquerade by Jenna Ryan

So years ago I was checking out a library book sale and I found this book and bought it as the synopsis sounded great. Gabrielle grew up with a street gang, robbing from people like Fagen’s kids in Oliver Twist. Gabrielle, now Rielle, and her best friend Luke left that all behind-she becoming a famous fashion designer while Luke moved up to white collar crime. The Phantom, a serial killer taking out actresses, goes after Luke, the only one who knows its true identity. When Luke vanishes, Rielle teams up with Adrian De La Costa, Brazillian race car driver and Luke’s cousin, and they head to a midsummer event in a mansion on the Yorkshire coast to discover what happened to him. There are a group of really imaginative characters, and any of them could be the killer.

I loved the gothic fiction, and how it referenced Dracula, The Phantom of the Opera, Charles Dickens, etc. I was telling my mom about it and when she saw the book she realized it was a Harlequin romance. That was embarrassing-but not really. I loved the book and there wasn’t really any sex or even kissing in the book-that’s why I didn’t catch it. I still love it and read it as it is a fun little novel.

I Tag:

Don’t forget to tag me back as I’d love to see what you choose!

For more books posts, go to Happiness is Having a Library Card: Another 13 of the Best Fictional Libraries

Don’t Fear the Reaper

Guess What Today Is?

Fridaythe13th

At work everyone was talking about how it is a Friday the 13th, and a full moon.

attack Wolf Boy Meets World moon full moon night

I know that freaks some people out.

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So I thought I would bring you something to put you at ease:

Erik: [at the Bal Masque as "The Red Death"] Beneath your dancing feet are the tombs of tortured men! Thus does The Red Death rebuke your merriment!

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper by Blue Öyster Cult

This song was written by the lead guitarist Donald “Buck Dharma” Roeser and is about accepting the fact that we are mortal and eventually our time will end. In the song he tries to talk about how we shouldn’t be afraid, after all:
Nothing in the world certain but Death

And that when our time eventually ends the love we have with others will carry on until we can meet again on the other side.

“And then he [the third brother] greeted Death as an old friend, and went with him gladly.” J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

I love this song, not just for the message, but the guitar:

BacktothefutureMartyMcflyrocknrollguitarsolo

And the cowbell! I just LOVE it. It is just perfect.

And of course this song has been on countless films and TV shows, including Halloween (original and remake)

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And Supernatural.

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It is a fantastic song.

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For more on Friday the 13th, go to Who Ya Gonna Call?

For more of my musical choices, go to No Mere Mortal Can Resist the Evil of the Thriller: Thriller (1983)

For more on Jean Froissart, go to It’s A Hard World: Backfire (1950)

For more Harry Potter, go to What Separates the Real Fans from the Fakes

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So you guys know what Friday the 13th means to me. My annual tradition:

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Time to Ghostbuster up in uniform or shirts:

ghostbusters

Bring out the pizza!

PizzatheNanny

And horror films:

Psycho-1960-Alfred-Hitchcock-Bates-Motel-pic-51

Or TV shows:

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Have Frightful Night

She'll get what's coming to her.

She’ll get what’s coming to her.

Pride & Prejudice & Zombies

Day 26) Z is for Zombie: Choose a Zombie Retelling of a Classic Novel

Zombies

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (Pride and Prejudice and Zombies #1) by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith

When I saw what Z stood for I knew that this was going to be the book I was going to review for it. First of all I have read very little Zombie themed books as that is just not really what I am in to. And secondly, pass up a chance to talk about Jane Austen?

Like that's happen

So I remember when this book was first released. It was right as the teen book world was moving out of wizards (Harry Potter) and Vampires (Twlight, Vampire Diaries, Vampire Academy, etc.), and was searching for a new thing to fill this niche. They settled on Zombies.

ZombiefilmsTheWalkinDead

But not just Zombies. They decided to take it one step further and pair it with Jane Austen.

AA_KnightleyDisapproved

And not just her. After this book, almost every classic was getting some kind of overhaul. We had Little Vampire Women, Sense & Sensibility & Sea Monsters, Jane Eyre: Vampire Slayers, etc.

Bad Sequels psycho-1960-alfred-hitchcock-janet-leigh-pic-21

It was a pretty bad time.

Ew Yuck Gross

Anyways, back to this book. So when it first came out it was a big hit. Everyone was talking about it. Everyone was reading it. The library was backlogged in holds.

ineedthis

I wasn’t really interested until my friend Elise recommended it to me. She really liked it and told me she would let me borrow her book. I was a bit wary as I didn’t understand why Austen needed any “makeover” or “spin” as her books were amazing the way they are. But I’m a sucker for a free book and borrowed it.

blanceTea&Books

I should have remembered:

notwopersonsreadthesamebook

So I read it. And how did I feel afterwards?

Guy you suck!

You suck!

I HATED this book. I thought it was badly done and the parts inserted by Seth Grahame-Smith were horribly written. And a lot of it made no sense.

Whattheheck

But that was seven years ago. Could I still feel the same way?

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Let’s see!

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13 Days Later

I HATE THIS BOOK!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT IS HORRIBLE! JUST HORRIBLE? HOW CAN PEOPLE LIKE IT? THEY RUIN AUSTEN. Grahame-Smith IS HORRIBLE! EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE. HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

wordICan't say Toy Story

I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT….I could go on for hours.

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But you don’t want to hear that over and over, instead let’s dissect everything I hated about this book.

DeanSupernaturalLetsGetStarted

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A) So Seth Grahame-Smith takes Jane Austen’s work and doesn’t really write a new story but just swaps out pieces for zombies.

really?

Really?

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B) Mr. Bennet’s Motivation

So the first biggest problem is Mr. Bennet not wanting his daughters married but “engaged in the deadly arts”. But that doesn’t change that the house and money all revert to their cousin because the estate is entailed.

Lady-Mary-DOWNTONABBEYENTAILMENTSUCKS

So if these girls don’t get married how will they live?

Seriously

Seriously

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C) Mr. Bennet Hates His Children

And the way Mr. Bennet hates his daughters? He didn’t hate them in the original book. He thought they were silly and not worth his time, but he didn’t have an outright hatred for them like in here.

That's not how it was in the book!

That’s not how it was in the book!

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D) The “Warrior” Code

In this world “the warrior code demanded she avenge her honor” for the insult that Darcy gave her when he said she wasn’t handsome enough for her. If they can kill for that why didn’t Darcy just kill Wickham?

ooh!

ooh!

I mean it makes no sense. Yeah, he doesn’t want what happened to his sister to taint her or make her an outcast in society, but in this world you can kill someone for an insult. Why didn’t he just kill Wickham and make up that he said an insult. The rules of this world just don’t work.

uh-no-gifuhno

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E) Elizabeth is a Jerk

Lizzie is so freakin’ cruel. She is incredibly mean to her sisters and everyone around her. Just downright cruel.

you're evil

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F) More “Rules” of Society That Don’t Make Sense

It is “unladylike” to bring more serious weapons than daggers and knives to a ball, but is okay for them to kill, flip around, kicking and showing off their lady parts (no underwear like us), etc. Wow Grahame-Smith you aren’t confusing at all.

confused

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G) No Knowledge of Martial Arts

Does Grahame-Smith know anything about martial arts? He has Elizabeth get into a crane position to attack the zombies, but then does a chop on the thigh. That makes no sense at all. Crane positions are for kicking, kicking! Why would you get ready like that and then chop on the leg? It is completely weird and wasteful of energy.

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H) None of the Characters Have a Heart

Mrs Bennet says all Charlotte Lucas deserves is a “crust of bread washed down with a cup of loneliness.” You see? Grahame-Smith is so cruel. None of these people were that mean. They all had faults but they wren’t downright heartless. How does removing the heart and soul of the characters make them better? Huh, Grahame-Smith? How. Well I’ll tell you, it doesn’t. It makes it horrible.

Or an author

Or an author

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I) Mr. Bennet is Abusive

Seriously, the way Mr. Bennet talks to his wife is downright abusive. Thanks Grahame-Smith for ruining a fantastic book.

I don't like it 11

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J) You Need to Reevaluate Your Career Choices

All the girls say that they could make great lives as assassins, bodyguards, or mercenaries. Really? Really? You think with all those in the military eventually coming out of the service that won’t be a problem? And how many people need a bodyguard or assassin? And if they are rich enough to hire assassins, bodyguards or mercenaries, why wouldn’t they just get ninjas from Japan or something? And to top it all off you are really only trained to kill zombies, not people. Slow moving, barely threatening zombies. Not the same thing at all. You don’t have the same training for the others.

Night of the living dead zombie

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K) You Can Pretty Much Kill Anyone for Anything

Mary almost kills Mr. Collins when he insinuates that one of them did the cooking. Now, don’t get me wrong, that is a serious insult. He implies that they are so poor they have to take on the role of a servant putting them on the same level of a domestic. But hey, if that is open for murder why didn’t Darcy just kill Wickham? I mean seriously, I just keep circling back to that.

Why?

Eh?

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L) People Do Not Understand the Levels of Class

I hate how everyone praises that Mr. Bennet says the girls aren’t trained in the kitchen but are trained as warriors. Only one problem, they were never trained for the kitchen. They were too wealthy for that. I blame the Pride & Prejudice (2005), in which they are made to look really dirty,  muddy, with animals running all over the place. They made them look really poor, but the Bennet family wasn’t. They were well-off; the only problem was the estate was entailed and the wealth they had wasn’t theirs to keep, like in Sense & Sensibility. And the reason there is an issue with marrying Mr. Darcy is that his aunt, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, is in line for the throne. I mean a lot of people would have to die, but still hypothetically she could become the next queen of England. That means it would eventually come down to him, so who he marries is a big deal.

Get it right!!!!!

Get it right!!!!!

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M) Why Wasn’t There a Duel?

So we have Wickham’s big pack of lies about Darcy and how he dishonored himself and Wickham by not giving him the legacy that was originally promised. One issue with that, if in this world you can kill someone for insults why didn’t Wickham do a duel with Darcy or kill him? Why doesn’t Elizabeth think of that?

BraveheartVictorySwordinAir

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N) All the Innuendo

The sexual innuendo. Come on Grahame-Smith, is sex all you think about. I feel like the girls in Grease 2, refocus your mind.

And that’s what makes Austen so great. She didn’t need cheap paltry things. She created a fantastic novel full of great wit and amazing work. Every sentience piece of art, delightful storytelling, Grahame-Smith not so much.

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O) Front Lines? You Mean No Lines

Elizabeth writes to her aunt that she is on the front lines of battle and prefers it to marriage, love, and family. Only one issue she’s on the front lines of nothing. She’s just hanging out in the country. Front lines would be the battlefield with the soldiers, but Elizabeth isn’t a soldier! She talks as if hired by crown but why isn’t she paid? And she’s only battling the village zombies she’s not even out there fighting where the hordes are coming from. Get off your high horse.

Seriously

Seriously

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P) Why/Where Did the Zombies Come From?

And that’s another thing that bothers me. Why did this happen? How? Why don;t they ever explain?

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Q) Grahame-Smith is a Child

Grahame-Smith is a ten-year old boy. I mean think about it. His obsession with body fluids (poop, pee, vomit, farts, etc.) and likes saying balls as much as he can. It’s the only explanation.

Seriously

Seriously

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R) Charlotte a Zombie?

I hated how they turned Charlotte into a zombie. I thought that was a dumb decision. How can no one notice but Elizabeth? Really?!

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S) Fifty-Five? Schfifty-Five

Fifty-Five years of zombie attacks? How are there that many zombies in existence to keep living? Why did zombies even start? Explain!!!!

totalrecallmachinedestroyargh

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T) The Battle Scenes are the Worse

Let’s talk about my least favorite part-when Elizabeth fights the ninjas. First the way that Lady Catherine talks about being taught by Ninjas. False, ninjutsu wasn’t something you were taught, but passed through families as they were assassins.

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Second Elizabeth fights at least three of them according to the illustration, but when she takes the time to strangle one with its own intestine why didn’t the other ninjas kill her?

Really?

Really?

The second ninja she blocks the throwing stars, and then grabs the last one midair and throws it back unharmed. You grab something moving that fast that sharp, no way. She would have cut her hand. And hands bleed like crazy.

ouch Hermione

The third ninja she just throws her katana and kills him. That easy?! Really Catherine with all her money and fame, that’s the best she could hire.

I don't think so

Oh, and I forgot. Elizabeth did that all blindfolded. Hmm, maybe she was hit by the same radioactive stuff that Daredevil was hit with because I don’t think she could have done that.

uh-no-gifuhno

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U) Elizabeth is a Cannibal?

She rips the heart out of the ninja and starts eating it. First that is serious zombie signs right there, I would have killed her. And second, eating human parts, i.e. a cannibal, makes you go crazy and get extremely sick. She should be totally insane right now.

I'm crazy

I’m crazy

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V) Grahame-Smith’s Mind

Ball joke after ball joke and now fingering? Austen is rolling over in her grave. If she became a zombie and hunted Grahame-Smith down, I wouldn’t mind at all.

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W) Why Won’t They Explain About the Zombies?

They travel to the Orient multiple times? Is the zombie plague just in Europe? Western Europe? In America as well? It would be nice if Grahame-Smith gave a moment to EXPLAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fliptablesangrysurprised

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X) Who?

On pg. 169 Jane and Elizabeth punish Catherine? Catherine who? Do they mean Kitty? Why call her Catherine suddenly? Strange.

SayWhat?BuffyVampireSlayernosense

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Y) Grahame-Smith Does Not Understand Women or Sisters

Elizabeth dreams of cutting off Lydia’s head? Really? Grahame-Smith doesn’t really know how to write female characters or sisters. First he has Elizabeth being mean to Jane, then Mary, and then Lydia. So completely cruel. And that is one of my biggest problems with this book. I hate Elizabeth! She is mean, cruel, harsh, rude, judgmental, and just downright nasty. I dislike her and don’t want to read more about her as I just can’t stand her. Yes Grahame-Smith, you actually took a character I lived and made me hate her. Good job.

dialMforMurder Killer Hate

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Z) Not Hatred, Circumstances

In this book Grahame-Smith makes Mr. Bennet hate Mrs. Bennet as he finds her stupid and dumb. That’s not how it was in the real book. Mr. Bennet married Mrs. Bennet and didn’t realize that they werent well suited until much later on. They lived well together, spending all the money as no need to save, they will have sons. When no sons came each went to the opposite extreme. Mrs. Bennet became so worried and crazed over her “failure” that she threw all her efforts into trying to catch husbands. That’s why she puts the girls “out” all at once, she wants them settled as soon as possible or they will be worse off then the Dashwood sisters. Mr. Bennet took the failure of no male heir and money a different way, he isolated himself in his library and books, trying to escape reality. They didn’t hate each other, they just didn’t really suit each other, drawing farther and farther apart.

The_Wolf_Man_4Crying sad

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AA) Elizabeth is a Freak

Elizabeth enjoys listening to the screams of burning zombies. What a sadist and creep.

Gilmore girls creep

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BB) Return of the Bad Fight Scenes

The fight between Lady Catherine and Elizabeth is horrible as well. Leaping all over the place like they are taking part in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon or something, The way Lady Catherine attacks, Elizabeth should be dead. Elizabeth stabs Lady Catherine in the stomach but Lady Catherine survives? What, that isn’t even possible. She’s dead, end of story.

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CC) Ew, Yuck, and Gross

Words some Catherine’s lips “After I behead her, ninjas you can do what you want with the body”, Grahame-Smith has some serious issues.

Certified Creepo Ribbon

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So yeah I hated it.

Hate YOu

Grahame-Smith just plagiarized someone else’s work changing a few words here and there and making it horrible. Grahame-Smith offends me to my very core. Destroying talented writing with his scribbles.

This is what I would like to do to him

This is what I would like to do to him

Grahame-Smith doesn’t even know how to write. His characters are unlikeable, story underdeveloped, and just all around bad, bad, bad.  Only one thing left to do:

DissedP&P

This is one book you should defintely skip!

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To start the 30 Day Challenge from the beginning, go to It Was a Pleasure to Burn: Fahrenheit 451

For the previous post, go to Why I Still Love My Fair Godmother

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For more on Pride & Prejudice, go to Austenland

For more Pride & Prejudice variations, go to Is Love at the Thanksgiving Day Parade Really Just Pride & Prejudice?

For more books based on Jane Austen, go to Midnight in Austenland

For more Zombies, go to No Mere Mortal Can Resist the Evil of the Thriller: Thriller (1983)

What Separates the Real Fans from the Fakes

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But whether they are cat or woman, one thing remains the same.

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Let reading cats lie.

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For more on Harry Potter, go to The Ultimate Torture

For more on Cats, go to Cat Lovers All Know This

For more book-filled posts, go to Six Degrees of Separation

The Ultimate Torture

I like to think that I am strong-willed and able to stand up to any pressure.

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But I think there would one thing that would be hard to get through, something extremely painful…

twilight

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You know if this happened it would be the ultimate torture. Everyone would behave and do what they were told.

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Speaking of Twilight, can I just say:

end Twilight

Too bad he didn’t accomplish it.

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For more Harry Potter, go to A Man of Great Worth and Respectability

For more on Twilight, go to Every Time I Bring a Girl Over, You Try to Eat Her!: Vampires Suck (2010)

A Man of Great Worth and Respectability

“[He] must be a man of great worth and respectability.

Yes, he is the kindest and best of men.”

-Sense & Sensibility (1995)

Wow, what a week. First David Bowie on Sunday and now we have lost one of the best actors to the same dreaded disease.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Oh Alan Rickman, how I miss you so. We are not ready for you to be gone from us.

Noo!

Noo!

Alan Rickman was an outstanding actor, no matter what he played you loved him. Part was his looks:

COL Brandonsexybeast

His amazing voice:

swoon dreamy

And his ability to breathe an incredible amount of life into these roles, so much that they seemed so real.

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So I decided to truly honor this great man, I’m going to countdown my top four favorite roles of his.

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4) Sheriff of Nottingham from Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

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I know a lot of people make fun of Kevin Costner, for his lack of accent:

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But I always loved this film. And one of my main reasons were because of Rickman’s incredible portrayal of the Sheriff.

Rickman originally was courted twice to play this, but turned it down until they gave him full control of his character. And he does it so perfectly. Crazy, evil, ambitious, logical, and somehow hilarious.

Favorite scene:

Sheriff of Nottingham: Locksley. I’ll cut your heart out with a spoon.

Robin Hood: Then it begins.

Guy of Gisborne: Why a spoon, cousin? Why not an axe?

Sheriff of Nottingham: Because it’s DULL, you twit. It’ll hurt more.

And being the awesomeness that he is, he went through 10 swords in that film. Just weren’t strong enough for him.

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3) Alexander Dane/Dr. Lazarus from Galaxy Quest

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This role is from the hilarious comedy and parody of Star TrekGalaxy Quest. 18 years ago the TV show Galaxy Quest was the hottest thing on the TV. Since then, none of the actors have been able to find much other work, being forced to be their characters for conventions, commercials, etc. One day they are transported to a real alien ship by aliens who believe their show to be “historical documents” asking for their help in fighting their enemy. They are forced to work together to save these people, in a most hilarious way.

In this film Alan Rickman’s character Alexander Dane the Spockish Dr. Lazarus, is a brooding, melancholy, mess who is dissatisfied with the way his life and career have gone. Sort of like Arthur Conan Doyle hating Sherlock Holmes, Dane feels the same way about Dr. Lazarus. However, as this group has to really fight, Dane proves that he is just as herioc and amazing as his fictional counterpart.

Favorite scene:

[Quellek has been shot, and is dying. Alexander rushes to him]

Alexander Dane: Quellek? [sees Quellek’s woundThat’s not too bad. We’ll get you to the medical quarters, and you’ll be fine.

Quellek: It has been my greatest pleasure to serve with you. I have been blessed, Sir. I… I… I…

Alexander Dane: Don’t speak, Quellek.

Quellek: You’ll forgive my impertinence, Sir, but even though we have never before met, I have always considered you as a father to me.

Alexander Dane: Quellek… by Grabthar’s hammer… by the Suns of Worvan… you shall be… avenged.

A sad scene, but one of the sweetest. He hates that line, but says it to his biggest fan; knowing he would appreciate it.

For more on Galaxy Quest, go to Don’t Give Up

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2) Professor Severus Snape from The Harry Potter Series

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This is the one you are probably the most familiar with. In the Harry Potter Series, Rickman plays the crotchety Professor Snape. Truth be told, if it wasn’t for Snape and Draco Malfoy I never would have become a fan of the Harry Potter Series. And if Snape wasn’t played by Alan Rickman, nothing would have induced me to watch or read.

Snape is first portrayed as evil (as Harry suspects him) but in reality is one great, although tragic man. Hurt, abused, bullied and tormented as a youth, his genius unappreciated, the love of his life choosing a popular and way uncooler guy; he was drawn into the false inclusiveness of the Death Eaters. Accidentally putting into motion the death of his love, he turned his back on the Death Eaters and redeemed himself.

However, when a new threat emerges he not only helps Harry by protecting him; although anonymously and ungraciously by Harry, along with becoming a double agent to get Dumbledore his information.

Even more tragic, he is willing to take the place of Draco, protecting him and keeping him from going down a dark path he could not return; dying for him and his students.

Favorite scene:

[Snape blasts Lockhart off his feet in a practice duel]

For more on Professor Severus Snape, go to A Bit Pottery About Jane Austen

For more on Harry Potter, go to The Fans and the Furious

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1)Colonel Brandon from Sense and Sensibility

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My favorite Alan Rickman role, and the best Colonel Brandon. This was actually the first film I ever saw Alan Rickman in, and my introduction to Jane Austen. I thank/blame Rickman for starting my life long obsession for the author. Thank you.

Colonel Brandon is one of the best Austen heroes. He has such a sad backstory, but still remains kind and good-hearted. When he was younger he fell in love with a girl, but his father broke them up. He went on to India, but she went down an awful life as she fell in love with a man who left her alone and pregnant. She died young, but Brandon took care of her child, raising it as his own. He then falls for Marianne, not caring that she had no fortune, but instead loving her mind and spirit. And even though she may not care for him, he still loves her from afar and wishes her well. When she is injured and caught in the rain, he carries her to safety. He is such a kind, generous, and one of the most amazing Austen men.

Even though some complain that Rickman was too old for the role, I don’t care. No one could create a more caring, compassionate, brave, kind, strong, amazing character the way he did.

Favorite scene:

[after a reading of Spenser’s The Faerie Queen]

Marianne: Shall we continue tomorrow?

Colonel Brandon: No, for I must away.

Marianne: [Worried] Away? Where?

Colonel Brandon: [Reassuring and playful] That I cannot tell you. It is a secret.

Marianne: [Pauses. Looks away, then looks back] You will not stay away long?

[Colonel Brandon can hardly believe that she cares for him. Shakes head no with smile]

 For more on Colonel Brandon, go to God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

For more on Sense & Sensibility, go to Waiter, There’s Some Disney in My Jane Austen

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So that’s my countdown to one great man. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, you will be missed and left us too soon.

Noo!

Noo!

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For more posts dedicated to a favorite artist/actor, go to Changes, Turn and Face the Strange

Year of the Anniversaries

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So you might have noticed that 2015, like every year, marks the anniversaries of certain things I adore. For instance I talked about the 30th Anniversary of The Breakfast Club.

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For more on that, read Don’t You Forget About Me.

The 200th anniversary of Emma

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The 90th anniversary of The Phantom of the Opera

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Go to Fantom of the Opera

And that this year also marked the 40th anniversary of everyone’s favorite shark:

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For more on that go to, You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Screen: Happy 40th to JAWS

And let’s not forget one of my most favorite movies ever! Yes folks, Back to the Future also celebrated 30 years of awesomeness.

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Go to Back in Time: Happy 30th Anniversary Back to the Future

But this year also marks the third anniversary of yours truly, JaneAustenRunsMyLife.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

In three years we have grown from a few categories to now covering all the Austen books, artwork, Back to the Future, almost every holiday, Disney, fairy tales, Harry Potter, nightmares/dreams, The GodfatherThe Phantom of the Opera, The Princess Bride, quotes, quizzes, my favorite music, horror films, things I FANGIRL over, Star WarsSupernatural, and many many more.

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From one follower to now 305. (And all real, not one paid).

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From just being on WordPress to having an account on tumblr, twitter, and my own twitter newspaper: Jane Austen Runs My Life

Gotcha!

And I want to say thank you to all my viewers who follow me on any of my sites. You all brighten my day! 🙂

And I truly mean it

And I truly mean it

So as the traditional gift for a three year anniversary is leather…well I decided that I would splurge and give myself…

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Clint Eastwood in a Leather belt

The law never looked so good

The law never looked so good

Clint Eastwood in a Leather hat

Dean Whinchester thinking leather jacket

Dean Winchester in a Leather jacket

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Indiana Jones in a Leather hat & jacket

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Shawn Hunter in a Leather jacket

Guardians of the Galaxy Star Lord Chris Pratt

Star Lord in a Leather jacket

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Owen in a Leather vest

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Rick O’Connell in Leather gun holsters

Do you think that’s too much? I don’t.

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For more on anniversaries, go to 25 More Films of Christmas

For more on the happenings of my life, go to Avengers Assemble

The Fans and the Furious

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Sorry I missed last week, I had a lot of stuff happening plus my post celebrating Back to the Future’s 30th anniversary and the 4th of July. But here we are with another installment of all things I fangirl over.

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Fast & the Furious Franchise

I remember when this film first came out. I didn’t see it in theaters as I was too young, but once they started playing it on TV I couldn’t stop watching it. I loved it!

love it

I would watch it mostly for Paul Walker (still sad about his death) and the awesome looking cars. I may not know that much about them, but I could still appreciate them.

So the first film stars Paul Walker as an FBI agent going undercover to bust racers who have been robbing trucks. I have to admit that I was (and still am) a huge Paul Walker fan and that was the first reason I watched it. Not ashamed.

It's Paul!

It’s Paul!

I like Vin Diesel too, but just as an actor. He reminds me a lot of my brother, lookswise.

Anyways, FBI Agent Brian O’Conner (Paul Walker) has a hard time trying to infiltrate the group as it is very tight-knit and hardly ever allows stranger. Him racing against Dominic “Dom” Toretto (Vin Diesel), and completely smoking his car doesn’t help his case.

Reality Sucks

He does catch a break when he helps Dom escape the police. Being the only one who doesn’t run away but helps him out, brings him into the group.

Double double yay

As he spends more time with these guys, he really gets to know them and like them. In fact he can’t believe there is anyway they could be involved with the robberies, as his objectiveness is thrown out the window for friendship.

He even starts dating Dom’s sister.

Spoke too soon

Eventually he realizes the truth when he hears about them going into the action, and follows them to help keep them safe. When one of the racers is shot during the robbery, Brian blows his cover by calling a helicopter in.

In the aftermath the rest of the group scatter, with Brian heading out to Dom’s house to get him. Instead of taking him in right away, as Brian still considers him a friend, they have one last race.

It was a fantastic movie!

Then came the sequel, 2 Fast 2 Furious.

In this Brian has been kicked out of the FBI for having let Dom go. He has been making a living as a racer, when the FBI ask him to come back and help them take down a drug-smuggler. The have an agent on the inside, Eva Mendes, but need someone to take the job as racer, and with Brian they won’t have to build a false character or worry that their guy will think the whole thing suspect. Brian agrees, but things get complicated fast. He and the FBI agent fall for each other, which is a horrible idea when the  guy you are trying to arrest is a psychopath, and another FBI agent hates his guts and is doing everything possilbe to make this hard for Brian.

It wasn’t as good as the original, but I still liked it. Paul was good as ever.

Then the third one came out, Tokyo Drift.

Karen stop talking

I don’t know what they were thinking! You can’t have a franchise be built on an actor and then suddeny new storyline, new character, new location. This was dumb, and doesn’t exist.

donotspeakofit

Moving on to number four, Fast & Furious, dumb name but good movie.

In this Dom and the crew are back together and once again robbing trucks. When the heat is on, they disband. However, Dom finds out that Letty was murdered. When he starts tracking down who killed her, he runs into Brian O’Conner. Brian is back to being a FBI agent again, and is trying to take down a drug trafficker. The two team up, and it’s just like old times!

Finally something GOOD!

At the end, Brian is suspended from duty and Dom is sentenced to 25 years. He never serves one as Brian, Mia, and the rest of the gang break him out.

In Fast Five, not only do we have the group heading down the Rio, (the year’s theme as tons of things took place here), but the addition of the Rock, Dwayne Johnson.

The group is supposed to do an easy job of stealing three cars from a train, but discover there is a lot more involved. Computer chips, betrayal by a friend, DEA agents, and of course fast cars. The twist end in this is a final scene that shows Letty is alive!

In Fast & Furious 6, the group is scattered, but as always can be brought back together for a mission. In this the Rock asks for Dom’s help in taking down former British Intelligence Special Agent Owen Shaw. He only agrees after seeing the photo of Letty alive. So once again the group is back together for fast cars and butt kicking.

Which brings us to Furious 7. I haven’t watched it yet as I am still disheartened by Paul Walker’s death. But I’ll see it eventually and am sure to love it too.

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Hans Christian Anderson

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I’ve talked about him before, but I’ll say it again. Just like the Brothers Grimm, Hans Christian Anderson is one of the best fairy tale writers of all time.

love it

Also being Danish, I feel a lot of pride in my countryman.

So I’ve probably mentioned this before, but I love fairy tales. I read them over and over as a child and continue today.

Or 10th, 50th, 100th....

Or 10th, 50th, 100th….

In fact I am currently rereading Han Christian Anderson’s work.

Anyways, his fairy tales are amazing, and because he is a Christian, they all have a deeper moral or parallel that he is trying to share with children and adults.

keanu Whoa

He didn’t write as many stories as the Brother’s Grimm, but the few he did are really powerful. Now I’m just going to list off my favorites with a brief note about them. You really should check him out for yourself.

There is the Emperor’s New Clothes, which teaches you that you shouldn’t focus solely on material objects, but need your sight somewhere else. It also shows you that people can be afraid to go against the grain and would rather stick with what’s stupid, than admit the truth.

stupidpeople

The Little Match Girl is a tale of a good girl living in poverty and abuse. She is wearing hardly anything, as they don’t have anything for her, trying to sell matches. To keep herself warm in the snow, she starts lighting matches, every time seeing a wonderful vision, until she sees her grandmother and is taken into heaven. It’s about dreams, hopes, and the eternal reward.

aw cry

The Little Mermaid is one of his most famous works, but I’m not going into it as I have already posted on it in The Little Moreland. The book is much better than the Disney film as it is about true love and being willing to sacrifice yourself for others.

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The Nightingale is about a Chinese emperor soon to be dying. A nightingale comes and sings him back to health. At first he wants to imprison him so that he can only sing for him and no others, but the nightingale tells him he can’t sing without freedom. He is let go and comes back to visit him. Someone makes a toy nightingale for the emperor, and soon everyone prefers this electronic and perverted one rather than the original. The real bird is banished, but unfortunately the new one breaks down from overuse. The emperor is once again sick, and the nightingale returns, causing the emperor to realize the true art was best. Not only commentary on art and artists, but original vs. new technology, the way people are willing to trade “old” for “new”, etc. There is a lot to be said about this piece.

Or story in this case

Or story in this case

The Snow Queen is probably Anderson’s longest story as it is actually divided into seven parts. Disney based Frozen on it, but it is nowhere near as amazing as the actual tale. This is the story of not only demons releasing shards of hate and evil onto the world, but of the equally evil Snow Queen. When she takes a young boy, Kay, who’s heart has been turned to ice by her and the shards; his best friend Gerda does all she can to find and save him. A powerful story of love, friendship, sacrifice, and bravery.

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The Steadfast Tin Soldier is so romantic. A tin soldier is created, but they ran out of tin so he is actually missing his leg. He falls in love with the beautiful paper ballerina, thinking she too is missing a leg like him. A toy goblin warns him to stay away, but the soldier refuses, and is thrown out the window. He does all he can to return to his love.

How romantic

How romantic

The Swineherd is one of those they get it in the end tales. In this a poor prince wishes to marry the emperor’s daughter. He sends her his finest rose and the best nightingale, but she refuses wanting the status of someone who has money to buy manmade ones, rather than something beautiful and real. She determines the prince unworthy of anything of her. He disguises himself as a poor swineherd and is able to con over a hundred kisses from her as she desires two inventions of his (a musical rattle and pot). When the king discovers this he throws her out, having been disgusted by her behavior. The prince reveals himself and also heads on his way, happy to be gone from someone who would prefer a swineherd with objects than a prince with true love. The princess is left alone to think on her bad decisions and lost status.

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Thumbelina is another cute tale about the beautiful girl only the size of a thumb and how she goes from crazy adventure to the next as she has to overcome many obstacles and creatures who want her.

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The Tinderbox is an adventure tale. In this a poor soldier is returning from war when he comes upon a witch. She asks him to go into a tree and get her a tinderbox, taking anything else he desires. When he retrieves the tinderbox and asks why she wants it, she tries to fight him and he kills her. Later he discovers that as owner of the tinderbox he can control three monstrous dogs. Now he uses his power to live well, rescue a princess, and battle a mean king.

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The Wild Swans is the last story I will write on. In this book we have a widowed king with a daughter and eleven sons who unknowingly marries an evil witch. She turns the boys into swans (by night they become boys again) and banishes the princess. After struggling, Princess Elisa ends up in the land of the fairies were she discovers that she can help her brothers if she takes a vow of silence and makes them shirts out of nettles. A prince finds her and brings her to his castle, the two eventually falling in love. They are to be married, but the archbishop is against it as he believes her to be a witch, a belief that is in his eyes confirmed when she goes to a graveyard to get nettles. They plan to burn her at the stake with her works, but as the are heading that way her brothers in swan form arrive, and she throws the shirts at them, transforming all but the youngest who is left with two wings. The truth is spoken and all live happily ever after.

The rest of his work is just as amazing and definitely worth a reading!

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For more on Hans Christian Anderson, go to The Little Moreland

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Hawk Nelson

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This was a Christian band that I got into when I was a teenager, and I have stayed a fan ever since. They gave great singers, musicians, and I loved that they still rocked out when it seemed that all music was destined to be pop and  rap.

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The only reason why I wanted to see the remake of Yours, Mine, and Ours, was because there are the band in the party scene.

Some of my absolute favorite songs of theirs are: Bring ‘Em Out, Crazy Love, Every Little Thing, Friend Like That, Live Life Loud, Love Like That, Skeleton, Take Me, Things We Go Through, and Turn It On. 

I definitely will be posting on them soon, but you should check them out for yourself.

For more Hawk Nelson, go to Fulfilling the List: A Walk to Remember (2002)

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Potterhead

Harry Potter Slytherin

Now I know Potterhead isn’t the official name for those who are Harry Potter fans, but I have been calling my friends that for years. Now this was a fandom I long tried to resist. When the books came out my parents didn’t want me to read them as they were unsure with how they presented magic and the patronus and such. Later they decided that I was old enough to make my own decisions, but by then I didn’t care. They didn’t really interest me.

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And then it was everywhere and in everything. And when things get too blown up, then I’m not really interested. And no I am not a hipster.

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I just don’t like doing things because everyone else is doing them. I’m not a hipster, I’m just old-fashioned.

So with all my friends being huge fans, and everyone I came into contact with loving it, it became almost like a game, my resisting peer pressure.

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It was funny two how they were always discussing whether I was a Ravenclaw or Gryffindor, and I had no idea what they were saying.

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I did follow the memes though, and found them hilarious. Even though I didn’t understand all of them.

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But then I met this guy and we started dating, striking a deal that for every Harry Potter film I watched, we would watch an equal amount of Jane Austen. (You can read more in What’s the Dealio)

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We broke up before finishing the series and there I was stuck at film five not really understanding what was happening. I could have just watched the films with my friends and asked them a gazillion questions, but I decided that wasn’t for me and instead read the whole series.

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I enjoyed it, and will post my whole thoughts on it later. I have a super long post in the works as a summary of all my thoughts on the subject. I’m will end with two more things, my favorite characters. One of which is Draco.

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Boy does he make me laugh.

My other favorite character is Snape.

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Not only is he totally awesome, and played by Alan Rickman, but he’s just…i don’t know perfect. He has a sad past, brooding nature, is a romantic, and all around doesn’t care what others think of him he does what he wants.

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Snape I love you. I know I’m probanly the only one, but I really wish you and Lily had ended up together and I think James Potter is a jerk.  Snape 4-EVA!!!!!

Oh, by the way I did finally find out what house I belonged to (on pottermore). I’m a Slytherin. And proud of it.

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I guess my love for Draco and Snape makes a lot of sense now. Nah, I’d probably love them no matter who I was.

For more Harry Potter, go to Heaven on Earthhearts banner

The Princess Bride

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I am a HUGE Princess Bride fan. But I actually wasn’t for a long time.

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I know crazy right? Well whenever I would flip channels on TV I would always tune in right at the end. For years I would only see the end of the film, and I didn’t quite understand it.

Every time!

This was back before everything was online so I could either buy it or rent it. Unfortunately, we didn’t have a card to Hollywood Video or Blockbuster.

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And my library didn’t have it.

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Then one year as I was talking to someone about how I had never seen the whole movie, my mom overheard and was in shock. So that birthday, guess what my present was? The Princess Bride. I watched it and loved it! From Westley,

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To Inigo,

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Even Vizzini

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And who can forget Miracle Max

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And let’s talk about the comedy of it all. From Westley never being killed but always threatened

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To the fire swamp

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There is so much to say, I just can’t get it all out.

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This is just one truly amazing film that I could watch over and over and over again.

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I loved it and had become a major fan.

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I even read the book (which is nowhere as fantastic as the movie, trust me).

In fact whenever I meet another person who loves The Princess Bride, I fangirl crazily with them.

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Just kidding. Although I do love that movie something fierce.

For more Princess Bride, go to Are You the Dread Pirate Roberts?

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That’s the truth!

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For the previous post, go to Fun & Full of Fancy

Stay tuned for part 16

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For more on fairy tales, go to If the Show Fits: Why Cinderella is Actually Awesome

For more of my music, go to Counting Stars 

Where We’re Going, We Don’t Need Roads

So it’s that time of the year again!

Happy-New-Year

It’s time for our year in review! This is a time to reflect on what the past year held for us, the big posts, what’s new, and what you all seemed to like the most. 😀 Something I did this year that I have never done before is post every single day, in fact I have reached my 300th and 400th post in this year.

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So even though what I have listed below may seem like a lot, especially compared to the previous year’s reviews, this post is actually only covering a few things. You really should check out the year yourself. To start at the beginning go here.

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1) The Views

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This year I had 31000 views!!!! Isn’t that amazing! I had only 9,542 views last year, which means this blog has widely grown! I have all of you to thank along with twitter and the good people at Buzzfeed who have been using my pics and linking them back to me. The top viewed day was October 11, in which I posted my review of Scream 2It’s Happening Again, Isn’t It?: Scream 2.

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2) The Number One Post

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The number one post this year came during my 30 Days of Disney (see #17) in which I wrote about my favorite Disney princess. Since Disney has acquired Lucasfilm that makes Princess Leia a Disney Princess, and, in my opinion, the ultimate one. To read more go to A True Princess.

Second place went to a post from my first Valentine’s Day countdown, Fulfilling the List: A Walk to Remember. In third was a post from my 2013 Halloween countdown, I Saw Goody Osburn With the Devil: The Crucible. In fourth place a post dedicated to my sixth month anniversary, Happy Anniversary. And rounding out this list we have in fifth place, a post all the way from my first holiday countdown, HorrorfestA Monster Race: Scooby-Doo and the Reluctant Werewolf

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3) The Followers

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So this community has really grown in numbers and I can not describe how pleased I am about that. We have gone from 14 followers in 2012 to 42 followers in 2013, and are now at 169. That’s amazing!

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So enough about the statistics and numbers! Let’s move on to what was covered this year and what changes I have made to the blog!

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4) Quotable Quotes

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I started a new category this year called Quotable Quotes. These are different quotes from books or sayings that I just absolute adore. Since I’ve added it, I’ve had a gazillion of them posted. In fact, almost every post has a quote or saying now incorporated in it. Be sure that 2015 will bring many more!

For more on Ayn Rand, go to In Their Proper Place: Metropolis (1927)

For more Quotes, go to The Final Chapter

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5) Social Media

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This year I have expanded myself throughout social media! I am on facebook, twitter, and tumblr. Follow me for extra goodies, including my #ManCandyMondays and #FilmFridays.

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6) Quizzes

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Go here to see who you are

Another new category I added this year was quizzes. Everyone loves personality quizzes, right? Well I’ve decided since I love to take them, that I might as well incorporate them in my posts. They are fun, and I always include the link so you can take your own.

For more Quizzes, go to What a Fanatic!

For more on Mean Girls, go to Food, Food, Food!

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7) Chinese New Year

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With 2014 we saw a return of the Chinese New Year post, but it being a bit different. Because there are so many lovable Horse characters, I decided to list 14 of my favorite fictional horses from books and movies; instead of favorite moments involving horses. To read the post, go to A Horse’s Tale

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8) Romance is in the Air: Part II

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I brought back my Romance is in the Air: 14 Most Romantic Moments. I have to say some of them may be unusual, but my blog, my choices. The movies I covered were: It Happened One Night (1934), It’s a Wonderful Life (1946), Roman Holiday (1953), Mystic Pizza (1988), The Little Mermaid (1989), Anastasia (1997), Flintstones Viva Rock Vegas (2000), Princess Diaries (2001), The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002), Love Actually (2003), The Notebook (2004), Persuasion (2007), Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II (2011), and Catching Fire (2013)

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9) Scenes from My Life 

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As every year I like to include little snippets of my everyday life. Such as my brush with death in Final Destination: Bike Edition. A weird experience in the mall, A Trip to the Mall Turns Into the Twilight Zone. Getting attacked in Snow White of a Day. Phone harassment by an ex-girlfriend in Do You Know Where Alex Is? A teddy bear I could NOT get rid of no matter how hard I tried in The Teddy Bear that Would NOT Die! My views on clothes of the day in Fashion Show. A day of incredibly BAD luck in Just One of Those Days…Nights…No DaysHow ordering pizza can be more than ordinary in Pizza Delivery. My attempt to start a revolution and its failure in Viva La Révolution. My attempts to dye my hair in That Girl is Poison. An exercise attempt gone horribly wrong in The Little MorelandA chance meeting with a really hunky guy in Just a MomentHow chickens really hindered my day in Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?  And an attack by a Christmas Tree in O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree.

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10) My Favorite Movie Lines

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As promised I brought this back! I tried to post every month 100 of my favorite movie lines: Episode III: Revenge of the My Favorite Movie Lines, Episode IV: A New Favorite Movie Lines List, Episode V: My Favorite Movie Lines List Strikes Back, Part VII: It Was Said One Night, Part VIII: The Little Movie Line List, and Part IX: Adventures in Movie Lines.

In June I did a whole post on my favorite Disney movie lines, Episode VI: Return of the Favorite Movie Lines ListIn October I did a post on my favorite horror film lines, Part X: The Movie List That Would Not DieAnd in November, I did an ’80s themed post: Part XI: A Movie Lines List Excellent Adventure.

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11) Verne’s Back

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2014 saw the conclusion of the Verne Saga. Some of you may have read my Verne Saga, but for those of you who have never heard of it before, Verne was a guy who kept hitting on me and never leaving me alone. Everytime I thought it was over, he’d pop up again. Although this last sighting was the very last one…I hope.

To read the Verne Saga from the beginning,  go to Flirting With Disaster

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13) Honoring Pride and Prejudice

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Two years ago marked the 100th birthday of Pride and Prejudice and I was hoping to do extensive posts on the book; going over the novel, reviewing books based on it, movies, TV series, etc. Unfortunately, things happened and I was unable to continue. However, I did pick it up this year, and here are the posts I did on it. In Flu Season I talk about how Kitty is treated unfairly. In Just Can’t Get a Break I discussed how worse off Mary has it. In First ImpressionsI talked about all the wrong things Mr. Darcy did when he was introduced to everyone. In Oh NO YOU DIDN’T I wrote on Elizabeth’s reaction to Darcy calling her “tolerable.” In The After Party, I wrote on how one always discuses what went on during a dance when it has ended. In An Assembly Such As This, I reviewed Pamela Aidan’s first novel in the Fitzwilliam Darcy, Gentleman series. Be assured there are plenty more to come.

Now when I was working on going through the novel, I decided it was unfair to the rest of the works to ignore them all. So what I have decided is that I am going to try and do all at the same time. Reading so many chapters in one, and matching that in all the others. Of course, along with doing books based on, films, etc. I have already started on Sense and Sensibility. 

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I have so far done only one post on it, A Family Affair, but there are plenty more coming. I also will be doing something on Emma as December 25th marks her 100th birthday as well.

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14) Painted Portrayals

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For Easter, I once again discussed different pieces of Art that depicted Christ. This year I chose The Last Supper by Juan de JuanesDuccio’s Betrayal of Christand Reubens’ The Elevation of the Cross

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15) Musical Stylings of Me

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So I continued my posts of my favorite songs. This year I covered The Final Countdown by EuropeUnbound (The Wild Ride) by Avenged Sevenfold, Carry on Wayward Son by Kansas, Na-Na-Na (Na-Na-Na-Na-Na-Na-Na-Na-Na) by My Chemical Romance, Highway Star by Deep Purple, Rock You Like a Hurricane by The Scorpions, Animal I Have Become by Three Days Grace, and In Love with the ’80s (Pink Tux to the Prom)There will be many more as I love music!

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16) Scenes of Supernatural

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Since my love of Supernatural is extremely strong and I include stuff from them all the time (i mean they have a gif for everything), I have also included a Supernatural category this year. There is plenty in the past and even more of Supernatural in the future.

For more on Supernatural, go to I Before E, Especially After P

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17) 30 Day Challenge: Disney Edition

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Every day in the month of June I did a post on something I love about Disney. I’m such a Disney girl, that these were hard choices but I was able to complete them all. Day 1) Your Favorite Disney Princess, Day 2) Your Favorite Disney Prince, Day 3) Your Favorite Disney Heroine, Day 4) Your Favorite Disney Animal, Day 5) An Underrated Disney Movie, Day 6) Your Favorite Disney Villain, Day 7) Your Favorite Disney Male Sidekick, Day 8) Your Favorite Disney Female Sidekick, Day 9) A Disney Film You Like but Others Hate, Day 10) The Most Aesthetically Pleasing Disney Film, Day 11) Your Favorite Disney Song, Day 12) Your Favorite Disney Love Song, Day 13) Your Favorite Disney Villain Song, Day 14) Your Least Favorite Disney Song, Day 15) The First Disney Movie You Ever Saw, Day 16) A Disney Movie that Makes You Laugh, Day 17) Your Least Favorite Disney Classic, Day 18) Your Favorite Disney-Pixar, Day 19) Your Least Favorite Disney-Pixar, Day 20) Favorite Disney Sequel, Day 21) A Disney Movie that Makes Your Cry, Day 22) Saddest Disney Death, Day 23) Your Favorite Disney Theme Park Ride, Day 24) Your Favorite Disney Kiss, Day 25) Your Favorite Disney Classic, Day 26) Your Favorite Disney Original Movie (DCOM), Day 27) Your Favorite Disney Hero, Day 28) Your Favorite Scene from Your Favorite Disney Movie, Day 29) Your Favorite Disney Remake, and Day 30) Your Favorite Disney Character of All-Time.

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18) Getting Over a Heartbreak Series

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This July I started a series of songs to help someone get over a break up. I would post every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday from July to September. It was a lot of work but fun as well. The songs I chose were If It Means a Lot to You by A Day to RememberThe End by SilversteinI Don’t Love You by My Chemical RomanceNow You’re Gone by Everyday Sunday, Heartbreak Hotel by Elvis Presley, Good or Bad by Action Item, Love Stinks by The J. Geils Band, That’s What You Get by Paramore, Chin Up Kid by Forever the Sickest KidsI’ll Be Alright Without You by Journey, For a Pessimist, I’m Pretty Optimistic by Paramore, Missing You by John Waite, Gone Forever by Three Days GracePut Me Out by The Used, But It’s Alright by Huey Lewis & the News, Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson, Move Along by The All-American RejectsUp and Up by Relient K, Red Rubber Ball by The Cyrkle, Over You by Daughtry, I Don’t Want to Be in Love (Dance Floor Anthem) by Good Charlotte, Here I Go Again by Whitesnake, Love Will Find a Way by Pablo Cruise, Don’t Stop Believin’ by JourneyThe Lining is Silver by Relient K, Whip It by Devo, Be Good to Yourself by Journey, Any Way You Want It by Journey, Unbound by Avenged Sevenfold, Here I Go by Relient K, and I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor.

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19) Harry Potter

Harry Potter Slytherin

So this year I read all the Harry Potter books and saw all the movies. I am planning on doing a post on my thoughts of them soon. (I just have so many ideas and never enough time!) But because of that, I included a new category on Harry Potter and have mentioned it in many posts. And, yes I am a Slithryn, just like my favorite character Snape.

For more on the Harry Potter Series, go to When in Doubt

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20) Horrorfest III

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So this was the third installment of my horrorfest series, that is 31 days of horror films or Halloween episodes.

I covered the following films this year: Metropolis (1927), The Wolf Man (1941), Shadow of a Doubt (1943), Laura (1944),  Under Capricorn (1949), Dial “M” for Murder (1954), I Was A Teenage Werewolf (1957), Queen of Outer Space (1958), Jaws (1975), An American Werewolf in London (1981), The Terminator (1984), Scream (1996), Scream 2 (1997), Phantoms (1998), Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet the Wolfman (2000), Scream 3 (2000), Along Came a Spider (2001), The Ring (2002), When A Stranger Calls (2006), The Mist (2007), The Lovely Bones (2009), Vampires Suck (2010), The Wolfman (2010),  Scre4m (2011), Godzilla (2014), and Gone Girl (2014). 

I also reviewed the following TV episodes: Happily Ever Aftermath from Grimm, Monster Movie from Supernatural, Tuesday the 17th from Psych, and Who’s Afraid of Cory Wolf? from Boy Meets World, 

And I did a post on 100 of my favorite movie lines from horror films, Part X: The Movie List That Would Not Die. 

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21) The Fifth of November

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So celebrating the 5th of November isn’t exactly new as I have done it in the past. However, the last time I did it, it was on Doc Brown’s amazing idea of Time Travel. This year I did it on V for Vendetta. To read the post, go to Remember, Remember the 5th of November.

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22) Fandom Posts

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This year I started a series of posts on things I am a huge fan of or fandoms I am in. It was supposed to just be one post, but instead has become very many. I post every Sunday, with each post covering six of the things I fan over. So far I have covered: Agatha Christie, Alfred Hitchcock,  Anne of Green Gables, Archie ComicsThe Avengers, Avenged Sevenfold, Awkward, Back to the Future, Batman, Bones, Boy Meets World, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Captain America, The Chronicles of Narnia, Copper, Criminal Minds, CSI, DanisNotOnFire/Dan Howell, Deadwood, Diagnosis Murder, Disney, Downton Abbey, Frank Peretti, The 4400, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Friday Night Lights, Game of Thrones, Garfield, Gilmore Girls, The Godfather, and Jane Austen

If you would like to check these out, go to Fanning All Over the Place, Simply Fantastic, Fantastic Fantasies, A Whole Lot of Fanfareand What a Fanatic!

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23) Thanksgiving
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Two years ago I did a Thanksgiving post, and I decided to do it again this year. I not only talked about what I’m thankful for, but pie, Twin Peaks, and Supernatural.

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Last year I mentioned I found this on Pinterest:

Jar of memories

But I ended up with so much stuff I actually had to do a shoebox full. Just so you all know, I will be posting on that shortly.

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So happy 2015 everybody!

And don’t forget to dress like this!

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And this!

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May this year be as awesome as always imagined!

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To read a review of the year 2013, go to Looking at the Past, Focusing on the Future

For the review of the year 2012, go to Looking Back, Moving Forward

For more on Back to the Future, go to Just a Friendly Reminder