Only A Woman: Queen of Outer Space (1958)

queen-of-outer-space

How did she manage to overthrow the men? They didn’t take her seriously. They were preparing for war. After all, she was only a woman.

Now this is a film I didn’t really care for. It was HIGHLY sexist.

No thank you

So the film is about four astronauts going on a mission to Venus to try and find out what it holds.

queen of Outer space

The interesting thing is that they used the same space station and uniforms from Forbidden Planet.  I spotted it right away.

When the guys arrive at Venus they discover it full of only women!

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I know you guys are thinking that it sounds really great. However you are dead wrong!!!! These women hate men.

Hate Men

The women take the men and lock ’em up.

queen of outer space

The whole Venetian society is run by one woman, the Queen, who is the biggest man hater of them all.

Men&Mon

Now Zsa Zsa Gabor is often thought to be “the queen of outer space”, but she is just an underling (unfair as she gets to be all over the poster). However, it is actually played by Laurie Mitchell. Anyway Queen Yllana (Mitchell) hates men, and when she took over the planet she rid them of them. She wears a mask and forces everyone else in a position of power to follow that credence.

Queen of outer space

While they lock up the men, we get to hear all the beautiful things that the men say:

queen of Outer space

Lt. Larry Turner: How can a doll as cute as that be such a pain in the neck?

Lovely guys, just lovely.

Ugh

Ugh

So the Queen doesn’t know how the men were able to get to Venus and that is something she is trying to figure out.

Capt. Neal Patterson: I didn’t say anything to the Queen. I didn’t want to put her on guard, but I’m beginning to think our being here is not an accident.

Prof. Konrad: I’m afraid I must agree with you.

Lt. Mike Cruze: What is that? What is that?

Capt. Neal Patterson: The ray that destroyed the space station and knocked us off our course may have originated right here.

Lt. Mike Cruze: Oh, come off it! How could a bunch of women invent a gizmo like that?

Lt. Larry Turner: Sure, and even if they invented it, how could they aim it? You know how women drivers are!

Ugh, men

Ugh, men

They find out that Talleah (Zsa Zsa Gabor) was the one who brought them. She leads a rebellion that doesn’t like being away from men. She wants to end the Queen’s rule.

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She and the Captain of the vessel start a relationship. However, someone else is interested in the Captain.  The Queen. She saw him and wants him.

Laura what I want

He thinks he can use it to his advantage, by romancing her.

Talleah: I hate her! I hate that queen!

Lt. Mike Cruze: She’s jealous!

Lt. Larry Turner: Twenty-six million miles from Earth, and the little dolls are just the same.

Ugh, men

Ugh, men

So he tries to romance her and the Queen is actually eating it up. In fact he convinces her, that he likes her so much he won’t be turned away by her face. She is so convinced of his care that she allows him to unmask her.

Phantomoftheopera1925unmasked

Queen of outer space

She has horrible scarring on her face from radiation. This is why she hates men. No one would give her any attention because of her ugly face. She becomes so angry she wants to destroy the opera house…I mean the Earth!

“Queen Yllana: I’m going to allow myself the exquisite pleasure of watching you while I obliterate the Earth.”

While Queen Yllana is crazy and evil, but at the same time you understand it. She could have been a nice person, but if no one is willing to give her a chance and look past her outer self, than how could she not turn evil?

So in the end Talleah and her group take down the Queen and allow the men to roam free. And Talleah becomes the new queen.

Ugh, men

Ugh, men

Yeah, I didn’t really like it. It wasn’t that interesting and I hated the men’s attitude to the women. It was just so hard to get through.

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to What Is This Thing?

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For more on aliens, go to Friday Night Fun

For more on men being a disappointment, go to Men What Happened?

For more on radiation poisoning, go to They’re Coming to Get You Barbara

For more on unmasking, go to Feast Your Eyes on My Accursed Ugliness

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This Isn’t Love, This is Ecstasy: Flintstones Viva Rock Vegas (2000)

Romantic Moment #10

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Flintstones Viva Rock Vegas (2000)

So this is the prequel to the film The Flintstonesbut it is a much, much better film. First of all the storyline is better, much, much, much better. And even though I love John Goodman, Mark Addy is a much better Fred. Rosie O’Donnell sucked as Betty. But most all, it has Thomas Gibson in it.

So Handsome!!!

So Handsome!!!

Sorry, I’m sorry. I just had to take a moment there. Back on track now! Uh, where was I? Oh yeah, this is much better than the first film.

So Wilma Slaghoople has had enough of her rich lifestyle. She is tired of friends who don’t care about her. Tired of people who can’t think beyond what’s in vogue, etc. Tired of Chip Rockefeller who’s only interested in her wealth. She escapes from her mansion and travels down to the town below, where the “common, everyday” people live. She stops at a burger joint and meets Betty O’Shale. Betty thinks she is poor and caveless, and not only invites her to live in her home but gets her a job as well at the diner.

Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble are best friends and roommates. The two have just passed their exams and are now certified Bronto Crane Operators. They go out to think about their lives, Fred expressing how he wants someone special to spend it with, when they meet the Great Gazoo, an alien banished to Earth to observe the dating rituals of man.

One day Fred and Barney go out to a burger joint and meet Betty. Fred picks her up and procures Wilma for Barney. They go out to an amusement park, but there Barney and Betty feel an instant connection and go off together. Fred is upset at first with being placed with Wilma, but after their bowling game they connect and start falling for each other. Fred also wins Dino for being such a great bowler. Soon the four (and the two couples separately) are spending all their time together, falling in love.

Wilma’s mom has tracked her down and tries to get her back, but Wilma won’t go as her mom is cold-hearted and looks down on her friends. Her mom convinces her to come to her father’s birthday party, she agrees if she can bring her friends. The next day they are shocked by how wealthy she is, Betty hurt at how Wilma lied to her. Fred was going to ask her to marry him, but after this he feels as if he doesn’t have enough to offer her. Wilma is mad at how her mother treats her friends, and storms out. Chip tries to make it up to her and invites them all down to his casino in Rock Vegas.

There we see Chip’s evil plan. He owes money to mobsters and is trying to get Wilma to marry him so that he can pay them back. He gets Fred gambling so that he will not only miss out on dates with Wilma, making her feel like crap, but so that he can hold onto Fred’s debts as a way to get rid of him. He takes Barney out of the equation by getting his girlfriend Roxie, to take him to an All-You-Can-Eat Buffet. Betty sees them and thinks Barney is stepping out on her, taking up with Mick Jaggerd (supposed to be Mick Jagger). Wilma is pissed off with Fred for being so wrapped up in money that she breaks up with him. Fred thinks he can win her back by getting more money, but Chip makes him lose everything. Chip takes Wilma’s pearls out of the hotel safe and plants them on Fred, imprisoning him and Barney. There the two meet up with Gazoo and escape. To avoid detection they dress up as girls, sneaking into Jaggered’s room. Jaggered and Barney get in a fight over Betty, with Barney knocking him out. Fred gets out and tells Wilma that he loves her. The two get married and as you know  have a yabba dabba doo time, a dabba doo time, they have a gay old time.

Most Romantic Moment:

So after Fred’s been imprisoned and escaped, his options are limited as to what he can do. After all, the hotel security is looking for him and will jump at the chance to take him down. But Fred really wants to get out there and tell Wilma how he feels, he can’t lose her. So when Barney knocks out Mick Jaggered, Fred does the only thing that comes to mind. He gets out on that stage and sings to her.

So romantic!

So romantic!

I know! So romantic!! A girl loves being serenaded to! And it’s not just the singing its the song itself! He picks Wilma’s favorite song, he sings their song! I absolutely LOVE this song, I think it is one of the most romantic ones out there. I mean just read it.

This isn’t love, this is ecstasy
Somehow I knew you would come to me
I’ve just been waiting for you to come
Into my life this way
Now here you’ll stay

This isn’t love, this is destiny
Somewhere above this was planned for me
Life had no meaning, I never knew what
Til the dream came true
The dream is you

I never say never
But this love won’t ever be over 
Together we’ll share love wherever we go

This isn’t chance, this was meant to be
I knew I’d find you eventually
Nothing else matters, As long as I know
You will always be so close to me

I never say never
But this love won’t ever be over
Together we’ll share love wherever we go

This isn’t chance
This was meant to be
I knew I’d find you eventually

Nothing else matters
As long as I know
You will always be so close to me

I never say never
I never say never
I never say never
I never say never
I never say never

Isn’t just dreamy and perfect!! Serenading, their song, it is just dripping in romance. Sorry about the low quality, it is the only one I could find.