For All the Men Who Wonder What It’s Like

So I was just on my facebook looking at things other people and pages post and then I found it. A picture that describes perfectly the emotions that run and thoughts that run through a girl’s head when she is on her period.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up.

So for all you guys who wonder if it is really that bad, oh ho it is. In fact this is what it feels like:

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Yeah, that what cramps feel like.  Or like being constantly stabbed with knives. So the next time a woman in your life is suffering from her monthly “friend”, give them a little sympathy. It’s hard to be a woman.

No joke this enters m mind every month

No joke this enters my mind every month

When the Itsy-Bitsy Spider is No Longer Itsy-Bitsy: Arachnophobia (1990)

When the itsy-bitsy spider is no longer itsy-bitsy 

I used to watch this movie all the time as a kid; I remember there being only a few scenes freaking me out. My older sister is arachnophobic, and she would always FREAK-OUT when she watched it. Like a mega, huge, freakout. But I did not remember it being too terrifying.

I rewatched the film and this movie is truly terrortastic!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was so freaky the way the had the spiders; because they actually described how they really act. Just like in Jaws and Them! when they add in all the scientific facts, you learn how freaky things can be.

The film is about a doctor moving his family from San Francisco to a small town to be in a safer area. He’s supposed to be taking over the previous country doctor’s practice, but the doctor doesn’t want to give it up.

No thank you

That’s not the only problem he’s facing; his house has rotted wood, no one trusts him in the town, he only has one patient, and the barn on his property has spiders.

What else could go wrong?

What else could go wrong?

Dr. Ross Jennings hates spiders. He has arachnophobia.

arachnophobia can't look

The other doctor is spreading lies about him. And then his only patient winds up dead. Pretty soon other people who were perfectly healthy wind up dead.

Sound suspicious

Sound suspicious

A young photographer who died in South America and body was shipped back to his hometown, is realized to be the  source of the problem. He carried a spider that is now breeding and sending his young out to attack other. He is the general and has a large supply of troops.

When the spiders attack, it is really, really, creepy. They just come out of everywhere.

What does the evil general look like? Where is his lair? Can they destroy him?

If you want to be scared you should definitely watch this film and find out!

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Just a side note here, I have always wondered why they don’t make a film connecting Vampires and spiders. I mean the two are so similar

1) A Vampire is able to trick people by zombifying their mind. They put others in a trance and controlling their minds

               A) Spiders paralyze their victims, being able to control them

2) Vampires suck the blood of their victims, usually when they are still alive.

               B) Spiders suck the blood out of the insects and creatures that enter their web while they are still alive.

3) Vampires only come out at night, they can’t live in the daylight. They hate light.

               C) Spiders don’t like the daylight either. They like to hide away in dark areas.

4) Vampires put their coffin and home base somewhere hidden away so that people won’t find it,

               D) Spiders may have a web out in the open to catch things, but they like to live in tucked away areas   where people can’t find them.

5) Vampires scare people and can look gross or cool.

                E) Spiders scare people. More people are scared of spiders than they are scared of dying. Spiders can also look gross or cool

I mean these two are a match made in heaven. They should have Vampires control the spiders or turn into them.

That’s the 30th post! So sad it almost over. To go to the previous post click here. One last post to come. 1 Day ‘Till Halloween!

Here’s a cover page/poster I made for my facebook page as part of my countdown to Halloween.

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To start Horrorfest at the beginning, go to I Don’t Belong in the World

For the previous post, go to Whatever You Do Don’t Fall Asleep

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For more on monster movies, go to They’re Coming to Get You Barbara

For more on vampires, go to A Halloween Hello From the Austen Men

For more on zombifying the mind, go to When Potatoes Go Bad

I Can Be Your Best Friend Or Your Worst Enemy: The Cable Guy (1996)

You know what the trouble about real life is? There’s no danger music

This movie is really creepy! Jim Carrey is awesome as a creepy freak. If you have ever seen Batman Forever, you would know that, but this is the clincher.

Certified Creepo Ribbon

The saddest thing about this is though, when I watch this film I see myself. The way he talks about films and TV; I just know that if I was a psychopath I would be Chip Douglas. Or Billy in Scream.

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So the film is directed by Ben Stiller and also stars Matthew Broderick. [You know with all those comedians it just has to be good]. And this is considered a black comedy, like Heathers, by most, but to me it definitely is a Horror-Comedy, or just down right horror film with comedic moments.

So Matthew Broderick’s character, Steve, had proposed to is girlfriend, but she turned him down. Steve then moves into his own apartment. He is depressed and about to get cable when his friend, played by Jack Black, tells him to bribe the cable guy and have him hook him up with all the premium channels.

Steve does, but that is his big mistake. Chip hooks him up, making him one of his VIP customers.

Ouch

Ouch

All of a sudden Chip starts running into Steve, ALL the TIME. And it isn’t pretty.

Chip starts calling him all the time, sabotaging his cable when he doesn’t get a reply.

“Chip Douglas: Hey Steve I’m on a pay phone, so if you’re there pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, well OK, call me back.”

Steve wants to have his cable fixed, so he makes up with Chip.

Funny-how-you call when need something cable guy

Chip in turn takes him to Medieval World, we see the psychotic and neurotic side coming out even more.

Things start getting worse. Chip wants to help Steve get back with Robin and ends up beating up her date, Owen Wilson.

He gives Robin free cable “on Steve”, and Robin gets back with Steve.

Steve doesn’t want to be friends with Chip anymore, but Chip doesn’t like that answer.

Chip ends up kidnapping Robin, and he and Steve have an epic fight at the end where Chip says my favorite line:

Chip Douglas: You know what the trouble about real life is? There’s no danger music”

This something I agree with as I think that life would be so much better if it did. Imagine if the Jaws theme song played when bad stuff was going to happen. Or a love song played when you met the perfect person for you.

thememusic

You should check this out, although just so you know I saw this film on TV so I’m not quite sure how graphic it is.

That’s today’s post, more to come! 9 Days ‘Till Halloween!

Here’s a little cover photo I made for my facebook page.

8carey

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To start Horrorfest from the beginning, go to I Don’t Belong in the World

For the previous post, go to You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Potato

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For more Horror-Comedy, go to Someone Very Special

For more on psychopaths, go to It’s Alive, It’s ALIVE!

For more on obsessed individuals, go to I Saw Goody Osburn With the Devil

For more in stalkers, go to The Only Thing That Matters is the Ending