I have to review another episode of Austentatious!
So those of you who might not be aware of what Austentatious is, I’ll do a brief recap. Elinor Dashwood, Marianne Dashwood, Elizabeth Bennet, and Emma Woodhouse-all coexist in the same city and are friends. They also are friends with Grant Knightley (Mr. Knightley): Elizabeth is trying to sell a agonizingly rude Mr. Darcy a house; and Elinor is trying to deal with Marianne moving in. Thus far…I DO NOT LIKE IT…
Ugh, this show!
Will I feel the same today? Well:
We start off the episode with Emma and Grant (Knightley) are hanging out. Emma brings an announcement for Mr. and Mrs Weston’s child Sam marrying Patricia (who are these people, we don’t know!)
What?
Will they play an important role in the series? Probably not and such a shame as Sam (assuming to be Frank Churchill) could have added some spice to what is already looking to be a boring episode.
Anyways, Emma takes credit for it. Then Elinor comes to join them, and Emma plans to set her up. Elinor isn’t interested, but needs help getting rid of a date she already made. Why don’t you just tell him the truth? Or need be-say you are sick.
Elinor doesn’t want to go out with Collin (Mr. Collins) a guy who lives in her building. Okay-like he isn’t drop dead gorgeous but he wasn’t downright annoying either or creepy. They should have upped that. I mean of all the Collins, he was the lamest. I mean Ricky Collins in The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, Mr. Collins in Pride and Prejudice (1995), and Mr. Collins in P&P (1995) were all just so eye-rollingly annoying. You just wanted them to stop!
Seriously calm down
This guy is just blah, whatever.
Meh.
Although, he does have a problem taking no for an answer, so that does make him a creep and having their first date be in his apartment-yeah no go! Never, ever go on a first date and be in the person’s home. Major, MAJOR red flag!
Just say no!
But you know what she never even agreed to the date. I mean he walked off before she could say yes or no, so really she can just not go and if he says anything tell him she’s not interested. And if he continues to harass her, file a restraining order-or at least threaten to.
Don’t mess with me!
And you know what, when he asked Elinor if she had plans why didn’t she just say yes. Staying home and reading a book is plans. Not going out with you is plans. And its not lying.
Okaaaaaaaaaaay, strike what I said earlier. They up his creep factor as he’s been watching her for weeks. Dateline called-he’s totally giving off the profile of serial killer. (IsDateline too old of a reference?) Tell him no and get a restraining order.
Not going out with you.
Elinor agrees to go out as “He’s not too bad”. Hold up, Elinor that’s what I thought too at first, but the man’s been watching you for WEEKS! Serial killer profile right there.
On a side note-this guy kind of looks like Monk’s annoying neighbor. It’s not, but how much more awesome a Mr. Collins would he have made?
Grant’s advice “At least you get dinner out of it” True, true. Better order something expensive to make up for it. But then again how do you know he doesn’t plan on Elinor being his dinner!
Elinor goes home and finds her sister eating cereal even though it is 5:30 pm. Why, you may ask? Because the clock didn’t have batteries in it when Marianne hung it up, so she thought it was 11:45. Oh chuckie darn.
Ugh, why do they make Marianne so dumb and empty headed in modern adaptions. Yes, she was a romantic and yes she was not sensible-but that doesn’t mean you have to make her a dunce.
A dunce who doesn’t want a job. Geez, why does everyone do that? Why do they think because she is a romantic she is lazy?
How does that translate to “I’m lazy?”
It DOESN’T!
Lizzie is trying to sell houses when she gets a call from ugh, Darcy. This actor makes him such a jerk I’d like to fastfoward any scene with him in it.
I know, sacrilege. But don’t blame me-it was the writers!
They failed!
What an awful show, it actually made me hate on Darcy. No wonder it got canceled.
Sorry if I don’t like something, I’m extra cruel.
Not really
Elizabeth’s not super interested and a shocked that he would call her after their last meeting. But you know sadistic jerks like that kind of thing.
Lizzie gives in unlike how she would normally do. Seriously, Elizabeth would be all:
Elinor meets up with Marianne and Emma complaining. Marianne tells her just admit she’s not into him, a great idea. Emma cautions her against it as it “will be awkward.” Oh Emma…
Lizzie comes running up, not able to stay long as she has to go do her next showing. She tells them about how Darcy called, and she would have turned him down but the is going to be good. But don’t forget Lizzie, there is a big IF there, IF he actually buys a house. And I feel like that’s not happening.
Emma tries to warn Lizzie it is going to be hard as Darcy is just, urgh. She encourages Lizzie not to let Darcy make her feel bad or act like she doesn’t know her stuff. Stay strong girl. Be the Lizzie we know and love.
Back with Elinor and Marianne, Marianne is doing a job analysis board to try and figure out what she will be good at-and what she wants to do. Marianne is mostly looking for which job will give her acess to hot guys. Okay how did this:
To this?
One job she is interested in is a bookkeeper for a Construction company as she “will be looking at hot guys” and Elinor is all no they will be ugly, fat, and sweaty. Okay Elinor way to be super cruel. You don’t know that, and not every construction guy is fat. And maybe that’s just their genetics. Way to body shame.
And okay this takes place in 2015 and all the jobs she looks at are in the paper. I was job hunting in 2014-15-there was very little in the paper. Online was, and is, where it is at. She should be sitting at a computer sending her resume into LinkedIn, monster, zipdrive, doing online applications, and checking out Craigslist.
Lizzie goes to the office to see Darcy, which is a bad idea, but she needs to as she wants to speak to him about her commission and prove that she knows what she is doing. Darcy is a jerk, but finally agrees.
Elinor gets home and finds Marianne hanging out on the couch with Grant and Emma, Grant stretched out on her couch on top of Emma.
Uh..friends don’t do that-that’s a total relationship thing. Seriously.
They are there to help Elinor get rid of Collin and Marianne with her job search. They decide the best thing to do is dress bad, and Elinor does a mini-fashion show.
Elinor tries on different outfits, but ultimately puts on the one she originally had and they all declare it to be the one to scare him. Yeah saw that joke coming a mile away.
I waited so long for this joke I died…
Lizzie and Darcy start looking over houses…and we all know how this will go:
Darcy is so annoying…
Ugh!
He gives her his specifications of what he wants and expects her to have 20 houses for him to look at. Well hey dude, maybe you could have emailed me what you wanted!!!!! You ever think of that????!!!!!!!
Forget you!
If I was Lizzie I would have given him a verbal beatdown- classy and professionally- left, blocked his number, and walked away no looking back.
Lizzie brings up she didn’t know and he’s all-you didn’t ask. Well she did in the last episode. So there doofus.
Take this list, you jerk!
And his final thing of what he wants, it should appeal to one woman, Well if that’s the case why isn’t she looking at the homes? How am I supposed to find a house if I don’t even know this woman.
Seriously stop!
He is so abusive that I can hardly watch this. I don’t know who wrote him this way, but they obviously have never read the books. Darcy gives one comment in the books-one, and it isn’t even really against Elizabeth! It is more I don’t want to dance and I am going to say this so you will leave me alone. They are making him the biggest jerk ever. And verbally and emotionally abusive putting her down like that and berating her-everything is her fault. It’s awful!
Did you even READ the book!!??
Elinor and Collin are on their date, being the only ones at his favorite restaurant, weird. He orders for her which is a major NOOOO!
Back at the apartment, Grant and Emma are hanging out with Marianne, waiting for Elinor. I thought this whole interaction and the way that Grant and Emma are just always over and eating Elinor’s food is weird. I have never ever had friends do this unless we lived together. We’ll just wait at your house and eat your food until your date is done? Maybe come over when the date ends or the next day, but just hanging out without you in your home. That seems really strange to me. They must be limited on set, the restaurant took most of their budget.
So Marianne and Emma throw darts at Marianne’s job board to decide her next job. But they don’t tell us, means it is supposed to be a “joke”.
Back at the restaurant, Elinor is not enjoying her meal. Collin thinks she is trying to “not eat” on a date, as women do.
Collin reveals the real reason he took her out. He needs her help. She tries to tell him she’s not interested but he puts his hand up and says “don’t interrupt” OH NO YOU DID NOT.
It’s like an explosion of rage. I can’t stand when guys do that-urgh jut makes me furious.
He’s into Lizzie and wants Elinor’s help getting her. He thinks Lizzie is shy and thought approaching a friend is better than going straight for her. Elinor is not going to help, but C won’t listen. She has to state it again-NO.
Seriously stop!
Finally he gets it through his skull, and is not happy, but asks her to keep his secret. Even without her help he is going to go after Elizabeth anyway. Oh and he wants her to pay, since it wasn’t a “real date.”
Elinor fakes illness and takes off for home.
Marianne tries to find an outfit for job interview and her clothes are all behind the times. None if these are what people were wearing at the time.
No, no, no
Lizzie comes over to the house and complains about jerkface. Elinor also comes back and says that it was awful but she doesn’t want to talk about it.
The next day Marianne stops by to say hi to Emma. She applied as a physical therapist-but she has no degree or experience, so she didn’t get the job.
Seriously
Like why is she so dumb?
It ends as she runs off to her interview as an astronomer.
That’s it for today, I’m out of her-and I’m not looking forward to the next episode. But as I like to say, “That’s a problem for future Moreland. She can deal with it.”
Have you ever had a book and had a bad feeling about it?
Either you check it out from the library, unwrap it, or pick it up in the bookstore and you just know that this book is not going to be something you enjoy.
Well that’s how I felt about this book. In fact I borrowed it from the library months ago, but just couldn’t bring myself to read it. Eventually I couldn’t renew it any longer and had to read it.
So I started the book out and I actually was enjoying it.
WHAT! MUST KEEP READING
But then I got to the end where it all fell apart and I hated it.
So what went wrong?
So the book starts out Claire Prescott. Claire is in her thirties and from Kansas City. She is in a lackluster relationship with Neil,a sports fanatic, and has recently lost her job when her sister calls in with a favor. After Claire’s parents died, she became the soul caregiver for her sister, forgoing college and other young adult dreams. Even now she is always caring for her sister, no matter that she is married and pregnant with her second child. Anyway, when her sister is put on bed-rest and can’t attend a special Pride & Prejudice seminar to give her paper, Claire steps up to the plate.
Only one problem. Claire has never read anything Jane Austen, and the only thing she knows about it is that everyone who has read or watched it is obsessed with Mr. Darcy.
So Claire journeys to Oxford University where she will be presenting the paper, and starts to feel overwhelmed as she is nowhere near the caliber of these people.
She tries to relax and settle down, when the most gorgeous man comes her way and asks to sit with her.
He introduces himself as James, in publishing, and from Manhattan. He too will be in the Pride & Prejudice seminar, although he is not a fan. Unfortunately he is as arrogant as he is cute. Luckily, the tongue-tied Claire is saved from making a fool of herself, as her room is ready.
That night and the welcome dinner, Claire finds herself seated with James and Martin, a kindly old man who instantly likes her. Claire tells them she is a doctor in pediatrics instead of the truth, making the same stupid cliché mistake that is done a thousand times in film and books.
So now you know she is going to fall for James, and he for her, and then the truth will all come out making James never want to see her again. Same old, same old.
Same old thing.
The next day is a free one, to help those who are suffering from jet-lag, and Claire decides to take a walk in the country. As she is roaming, she runs into an older woman, in a trench coat, sitting on a stump.
That’s weird.
Her name is Harriet Dalrymple and it turns out that she is a fan of Jane Austen as well. In fact she is distantly related to the author.
Harriet invites Claire over for tea, and Claire goes as she hopes to get Harriet out of the heat. They get to Harriet’s home, when Harriet drops a bomb on Claire. It turns out she has an earlier draft of Jane Austen’s Pride & Prejudice, the one that has been believed to be destroyed.
Claire is sure Harriet is joking, but Harriet pulls out a sheet of very old paper, written in old ink, and it looks extremely legitimate.
So Claire starts reading, and even to her limited knowledge it doesn’t seem right. While the style looks right,
Mr. Bennet is dead!!!
Noooooooooo!!!!!!!
And Mr. Bingley chooses to forgo renting Netherfield!
Rev. Collins decides to leave the church and instead become a gentleman of leisure.
This version sounds more like the beginning of Sense & Sensibility, with Elizabeth planning their removal to a cheaper area, Mr. Collins coming and kicking them out a’la Fanny Dashwood, and the whole group moving to the seaside. The only difference? Elizabeth decides to seek employment.
Noooooooooo!!!!!!!
Now there are quite a few problems with this writing, the first being why didn’t Jane marry Mr. Collins? When you read Pride & Prejudice, we know Jane is a people pleaser and that she would do anything her parents told her too. And we know that Mr. Collins likes Jane, in fact the only thing that keeps him from marrying her is because Mrs. Bennet assumed that Mr. Bingley would ask for Jane’s hand. But if we have no Mr. Bingley, then most likely Mr. Collins would have asked for Jane’s hand and Mrs. Bennet would have agreed, like in Lost in Austen.
Why would Elizabeth be seeking employment? I mean we know that Elizabeth cares for her family and wants to help them, but she is of the gentry class [minor], so it is a bit odd that that would be her first idea. Someone like her who has never had to worry about such things automatically jumping to that? This isn’t modern times, it would make more sense if the idea grew gradually instead of all at once.
So Claire becomes a little weirded out as Harriet says “the others won’t be happy” that she shared the manuscript. In fact she starts to worry that maybe she is in the opening scenes of a horror film.
She quickly runs away and heads to downtown.
In downtown she runs into Martin and learns more about Jane Austen, such as the fact that she wrote a manuscript 10 years prior to Pride & Prejudice, but choose not to keep it, later publishing the one we have today. That starts her thinking, could the one I’ve been reading at Harriet’s be the “real” one?
Martin also tells Claire about Tom Lefoy, the wealthy man Jane Austen fell for, but was unable to marry as his relatives quickly spirited him away from such a poor conquest. Tom Lefoy is believed to be the foundation for Mr. Darcy’s character, Austen’s version having a man of high means willing to brave the negative consequences of marrying down, along with the hateful reception from his relations. Tom Lefoy was also the basis for the plot of Persuasion, of course that novel being a wish fulfillment as the man goes away, but comes back, reuniting the couple.
The next day starts the seminar, and Claire meets their facilitator Eleanor Gibbs. Besides Claire, James, and Martin, there are three other group members: Rosie and Louise from New Zealand, and Olga from Russia. Rosie & Louise go first, their video presentation on the many portrayals of Mr. Darcy in film and TV.
Now nobody likes their presentation, but this would actually be pretty fascinating IF done right.
I mean first we have Laurence Olivier (my opinion one of the best Darcys) who is able to play restrained and rude; balanced with the charming and endearing Darcy. You also see subtle changes in how he talks to Elizabeth, but with the proposal still coming as a shock. Then we have David Rintoul in the ’80s who is more rude than restrained. Colin Firth‘s Darcy is the first time we are seen multiple sides of Darcy as in this depiction as we are shown his viewpoint on events instead of just Elizabeths. In Furst Impressions, Mr. Darcy is played by Wishbone the dog, being RADICALLY different. Then we have Colin Firth again, this time in Bridget Jones’ Diary, playing a betrayed man, restrained as his heart was broken, but eventually showing his true emotions. Martin Henderson in Bride & Prejudice, is not only extremely cocky but integrating into a vastly different culture. Matthew Macfayden is more cold than rude, changing more rapidly to the charming Mr. Darcy. Lost in Austen’s Darcy is played by Elliot Cowan who can be downright cruel at times. Josh Hopkins‘ Darcy in The 12 Men of Christmasisn’t a gentleman or rich, but a rugged outdoorsman, small business owner, and volunteer on the rescue squad. J.J. Feild in Austenland is more reserved, but then easily transforms to the Darcy we all love. And then of course Daniel Vincent Gordh, The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, isn’t even shown until the very end, forcing the viewers to rely on how Lizzie and friends see him, contrasting that to the amazing Darcy we are later introduced to. Sorry small tangent, I’ll get back to the book review.
So, no one likes their presentation and Claire feels better about presenting next time.
The next day, Claire sees James and Eleanor talking, and it doesn’t seem to be going all that well. She waits until they are done to get a seat, when Eleanor comes over to talk to her.
It turns out that Harriet is Eleanor’s mother and suffering from dementia. Eleanor thinks Claire will only make things worse and wants her to stay far away. Claire doesn’t want to stop seeing Harriet, but at the same time she doesn’t want to hurt her.
Later that afternoon as she is walking away, James comes out of nowhere and asks her to dinner.
What?
Claire is surprised, but accepts.
James takes her to a super fancy place for dinner and the two discuss Darcy. James thinks it’s the money and extreme good looks that stirs the women’s hearts, but Claire doesn’t agree. He kind of squashes anything Claire has to say in retort and moves on to other topics.
Now here is where James is dead wrong. Money isn’t what makes Darcy so sought after, [you can read more about in my post First Impressions], it’s the fact that he is willing to humble himself and admit he was wrong, help out the Bennet family with no promise that he would gain Elizabeth’s heart, and the fact that he is brave enough to withstand all objections by his family for the woman he marries. That is why he is so romantic!
Anyways, James tells Claire that Martin is a professor who’s field is Jane Austen, in fact he will be teaching in Oxford in the fall. Claire is surprised and the conversation moves on.
That night as James is walking Claire to her dorm, the two have a moment, nothing happens, but Claire is starting to feel guilty about it as she is in a relationship with Neil. A stagnant, boring one, but a relationship none the less.
The next day Claire finds herself going to see Harriet’s, and another portion of the “manuscript”.
Elizabeth is at Rosings Park, a companion to Lady Catherine de Bourgh’s daughter Ann.
Okay why is she working here? How did she even meet Lady Catherine? Reverand Collins introduced them in the original novel, but judging from how people treated the ex-Reverand Hale in North & South, I don’t think Lady Catherine would want someone related to the ex-Reverand Collins. Whether he left the church for beliefs or money.
So Mr. Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam are on their way to visit. Elizabeth goes out walking the gardens and getting messy, dirty, and tan. She runs into Mr. Darcy on a horse. He believes her to be a lower class servant and is rather mean to her. Elizabeth shoots the barbs right back.
Okay in Pride & Prejudice, Mr. Darcy was seen as rude or cold, but never downright mean. In fact the whole reason everyone really starts hating him is that he gives the impression of looking down on people and says Elizabeth isn’t pretty enough to him. BUT, we know from his servants that he really nice and caring, so why would you make him like this?
Get it right
As she continues on her way, angry with herself as being rude might get her fired, she encounters Colonel Fitzwilliam, who has injured himself riding. The two flirt a bit, and Elizabeth scurries on her way to get help.
So we have Colonel Fitzwilliam as a rival for Elizabeth’s affections instead of Wickham. Claire is surprised by this, but can’t read more as she has to leave. Harriet warns her about Mrs. Potter, the leader of the Formidables, a secret society that wants to make sure anything Jane Austen’s sister did not intend for public viewships to remain hidden. Eleanor also wants the manuscript as she wants to publish it and become rich. Harriet sends all the pieces she has found with Claire, feeling they are safer with her until she makes her decision as what to do with them.
So now it is as if Claire has entered a spy movie, as she has “the package” everyone is after.
As Claire is contemplating what to do, she runs into James, who invites her to tour the Botanical Gardens with him. They walk around with Claire wanting to slowly stroll and take it all in, while James is just wanting to keep moving forward. Claire questions him as to what happened if a famous author’s previous manuscript was discovered and James tells her that it will mean A LOT OF MONEY for the person and the publishing house.
They eventually have to stop as it gets too hot. Now I have never been to England and I know this author has, but I looked up the temperatures and it does not get hot. 70 degrees? That’s nothing, try being in the ’90s or 100s. THAT’S HOT!
Anyways, as they are resting, James falls asleep, leaning on Claire. So with Claire having one guy interested it is fitting in scriptworld for Neil to decide to call her up.
Phew!
Yes Neil who hardly ever seems to pay attention and is just calling her after she has been there like three days already! THREE DAYS!! He should have called the first day to see that she got in okay. Bad boyfriend, bad.
See Hook agrees with me.
It turns out that Claire’s sister Missy said something to him, that made Neil want to call. Hurumph.
James wakes up and asks Claire to dine with him again, but she decides that the dining hall is better as the nice restaurants make her a bit uneasy and they really should be mingling with the other students. They have dinner, with Martin joining them. At the end of it, one of the porters comes for Claire as she has a package waiting for her.
Inside the package are more pages of the novel. Claire runs to her room to read more when she finds a warning note from Mrs. Parrot who wants the pages back.
They’re watching her!
Claire decides to continue reading as she just has to know what happens next.
So Lady Catherine is throwing a ball, of which Elizabeth is not invited. To her surprise at the last minute Lady Catherine requests her presence, and she dresses quickly in a black gown.
So as this manuscript is missing a lot of pages, we are unsure how long after Elizabeth’s father died that this ball is taking place. Black was only worn during the full morning period, half of the complete mourning period. As a daughter, Elizabeth would mourn for six months, having to wear all black in the first three and could wear half black for the last three. SHE WOULD NEVER, EVER wear a black gown if she wasn’t mourning. Now as Elizabeth is mourning, as she is wearing black, she could not go to the ball. Customs allowed the deceased’s family to only go to Church and a few functions, balls were out of the question. And a woman like Lady Catherine who cares so much about propriety and society would never make a faux-pas like that. NEVER!
So a mistake like that? Book’s a fake. Move on Claire, move on.
Majorly
So Rev. Humphrey, the one who took Mr. Collins’ position, invites Elizabeth to an outing to show off his house. Mr. Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam are also going to take a look. Elizabeth agrees, if Ann’s health allows her to come. Lady Catherine agrees if Darcy leads Ann. Elizabeth notices that Darcy doesn’t seem eager to be thrown together with his cousin. Colonel Fitzwilliam will lead Elizabeth, disappointing Rev. Humphrey as he wanted her all to himself.
Claire decides to go out for some exercise, taking the manuscript in her purse, and runs into Martin. She asks for his help and shows him the manuscript. Martin wishes he could see more and find out where it all came from, but Claire can’t tell him as she promised Harriet. Martin guesses that the Formidables are involved somehow in all this, much to Claire’s surprise. In the end Martin tells her that he believes it could be real, and when Claire asks for advice of what to do, he tells her to follow her heart.
As she is heading to her room, Claire runs into James who makes her feel…words can’t describe. He walks her home when, he suddenly kisses her.
Just as suddenly he breaks away, all sorry that he gave her the wrong impression but nothing can happen here story. If nothing can happen why would you kiss her? Come, on!
Claire is justifiably incensed and takes off to her room. When she reaches her room she finds it ransacked!
The next day Eleanor is angry with Claire for bothering her mother, and tries to get the manuscript from her. But Claire steadfastly refuses.
It’s time for Claire to share her sister’s essay, which is on the relationship between Elizabeth and Jane. Her sister, Missy, feels that Elizabeth’s constant helping actually hinders her chances of securing an attachment with Bingley, rather than the younger sister’s actions. However, I disagree as anything anyone says about Jane doesn’t deter Bingley except for when Mr. Darcy tells him that not only is Jane from bad stock, but he doesn’t think she really likes Bingley that much. So in reality it comes from Elizabeth not telling Jane what Charlotte told her too, make it clear she was very interested. Sorry Missy but you have some huge holes in your thesis.
This whole essay upsets Claire as it makes her rethink her relationship with Missy, maybe Missy actually resents everything she’s done to help her.
After the paper is shared, they spend the rest of the time talking about the guy we all hate, Wickham.
When class end Claire finds herself back at Harriet’s cottage, and is given the next part to read.
So the group has gone out to visit Rev. Humphrey’s home. The good Rev. is very interested in Elizabeth, which upsets Lady Catherine. ( I don’t know why? Wouldn’t she prefer him giving her all the attention instead of her nephews?) Elizabeth finds herself continuously paired with the colonel and starts enjoying her time with him. Elizabeth asks about an engagement between Darcy and Ann, but Colonel Fitzwilliam assures her that there is nothing definite. Elizabeth is hopeful as she cares for Darcy.
Now why would she do that? In this manuscript we have only seen two thing with Darcy 1) rude to servants and people he thinks are below him 2) Very quiet. Now does that seem like something Elizabeth would fall for? NO! In Pride & Prejudice there is the hope that maybe he might be her true guy, which is dashed when he says that he doesn’t think she is that attractive. Her contempt for him is only changed after she sees his sweet behavior in Pemberly with his servants, sister, and her and her relations. This is all further fortified when he helps with Lydia and brings Jane and Bingley together. Get it right!
Get it right Beth Patillo!!!
Elizabeth asks the Colonel more about himself and learns that he has recently left the regiment as he has been granted a parcel of land by his father. He doesn’t seem supremely happy with the choice as he misses being out on the sea. Elizabeth also shares a bit of her feelings on how she dislikes the changes her family was forced to go through. Elizabeth then starts thinking on how he would make a great husband, and protect his wife. If only Darcy was like that. Darcy, who makes her feel alive when he kissed her, but now only ignores her.
There are two, HUGE problems with that! Huge!!
First of all, look at Elizabeth!! That’s not Elizabeth. That character is the type you would find in a 10¢ “historical”, bodice-ripping, romance novel. Oooh what a strong protector. Oh Mr. Darcy’s eyes, his lips. NO NO NO NO NO NO! Elizabeth does not moon over such things NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! This is horrible! This is like bad fan fiction. This is Fifty Shades of Gray bad! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!!!! Elizabeth would never act like that, Never!!!
I’m sooooooooo upset right now!!!!!!
Just argh!! Words cannot express how much I hate how they took a character I love and destroyed it so!!! And I get that the author is trying to present a radically different Austen novel and one that a younger Jane might write but I don’t care!!! I don’t like it!
And number two NO KISSING IN JANE AUSTEN NOVELS!!!! There is no way Jane Austen would write them kissing. That wasn’t done in Regency periods. You don’t go kissing until after marriage, unless you are a no good cad like Mr. Tilney’s older brother. So NO NO NO NO! Mr. Darcy would not be trifling with girls affections, no. And Jane would not put that in there.
No way! It is a FAKE!!!!!!
Elizabeth enjoys Colonel Fitzwilliam’s company, but she is in love with Darcy.
Although I don’t know why as apparently he is a cad.
As Claire leaves Harriet’s she sees someone following her.
It’s Mrs. Parrot who wants the manuscripts back.
The next morning, Claire heads out to Starbucks and on the way to class runs into James. James wants to apologize for how he was acting as he cares for her. He is about to confess something to Claire, and Claire is about to tell the truth on her not being a doctor, when who should appear? Neil.
What a cliché!
Neil introduces himself as Claire’s boyfriend, which upsets James. James asks if it is true, of which Claire says yes, causing James to become angry and stalk off. Neil realizes what has been happening and also becomes angry and takes off. Claire is just appalled at how quickly life was turned upside down.
James presents his paper on how Elizabeth wasn’t really in love with Darcy but just a gold-digger once she saw how awesome Pemberly was. Claire runs out, just wanting to be alone to deal with all the stuff that went down that morning. She runs to the nearby river to think, when Neil comes floating down on a boat. They talk about their relationship, with Neil admitting that he didn’t pay as much attention to her as he should have, but that Claire wasn’t giving him as much attention as she is too focused on her sister. Now I thought this was a very late development, as previously Claire had mentioned that she did a lot for her sister, but when Neil mentions it as almost an obsession. Who is right? We don’t know as the author is almost trying to rescind her earlier reasons for why Claire was unhappy in her relsationship and the whole character based on Neil. I don’t buy it.
Claire leaves Neil to think, and heads to Harriet’s who has found more pieces of the manuscript.
Elizabeth is walking in the park when she runs into Mr. Darcy. Mr. Darcy tells Elizabeth that he will not be victim to her game of trying to catch him. He tells her he loves her but that he could never marry a poor peon like her. If he was free from family control, maybe, but no. Elizabeth becomes angry, and says she never tried any such thing of “catching him”. And Darcy is free to do what he wishes.
Okay this is what I don’t like! They made Darcy the villian! They made him a pompus, jerk, pansy, mamma’s boy! No, NO, NO, NO. That is not how Darcy should be. And wouldn’t this Darcy make more sense after her fling with Tom LeFoy as she would have been angry with his lack of standing up for their love and releasing her anger in written form? Why would she change and make Darcy better after such a disappointing circumstance when her previous creations evoked a closer emotion. It doesn’t make sense to me. And Darcy cannot be the villain. NO!!!!
Elizabeth then travels to see Jane and pour out her miseries
Whatever! This book is going to have to do some major begging to get me to like it as it has sunk very, very low in my opinion.
So Claire and Neil meet at a pub to talk. It turns out that Neil is doubly upset as he was going to ask Claire to marry him.
They break up, and Neil heads to the airport.
Claire runs into James, who once he hears about the breakup, wants the two to start over fresh and build a life together. Claire appreciates his thoughts but tells him the truth about her not being a doctor. She also tells him that a part of her has been believing that he’s her Mr. Darcy.
Which he isn’t as he is totally jerky. Remember their dinner together, where he wouldn’t let her express her opinions?
Claire goes to sleep missing Neil and wondering why she thew him away.
Uh, Claire let me just remind you that the boy was taking you for granted and waited three days before calling or texting you! Three days! Find someone who really cares about you.
Missy calls Claire the next day and the two have a huge heart-to-heart. Missy tells her how she loves her sister, but truth is Claire has been sacrificing too much of her dreams and goals. Missy is grown now, Claire should be focusing on her own life, needs, desires, etc.
She later runs into Neil, who couldn’t catch a flight, which makes her regret everything even more. She believes that the man next to her is better than Mr. Darcy/James. Of which let me remind you James is nowhere near Mr. Darcy, and if Claire had actually read Pride & Prejudice she would know that.
Martin finally presents his topic and it is on courage, the courage that Elizabeth has to reexamine herself and understand her heart.
As she is leaving, James approaches Claire. He tells her that he originally pursued her not because he liked her but because Eleanor told him that she had a copy of the manuscript. He was the one who ransacked her room.
He fell in love with her along the way and hope that they can start completely new and fresh. Claire says thanks, but no thanks. Which good for you, you don’t need a Wickham in your life.
Claire then goes to the Bodleian Library and researches into Austen’s life, finding what she thinks is the key to the change in the Mr. Darcys.
Claire believes that Austen changed from the previous manuscrupt because she actually expereienced what it was like to be poor. She also believes that the Mr. Darcy we love today, was created as to give redemption to the man that broke her heart and fell short of her ideals. Harriet agrees and gives her the last page.
Elizabeth is visiting her Aunt and Uncle Gardiner in London, and enjoying their time together. She is trying to find a new job when a man arrives to see her, Colonel Fitzwilliam. He comes and tells her that he loves her and wishes to marry her, and that he is willing to stand up to the disagreements of his family. Elizabeth agrees to marry him. They take off to visit Darcy’s friend Bingley, taking along Jane. The End.
So all the author really did in this book was turn Darcy into a cad and reverse which Fitzwilliam had the guts. In the actual book, Colonel Fitzwilliam tells Elizabeth that he likes her but needs a woman with fortune, making sure that she has no hopes pinned on him. In this she has Darcy do it. Yawn.
Nothing about this book was revolutionary to me or that delightful, as Pattillo seemed to be trying to just make money off Jane Austen fans, by twisting one of her classics and taking the characters we adore turning them into strange creatures only seen in stupid low-quality romances.
By the way, Claire gives the papers to Harriet, and she returns home set on going to school, getting her degree, and gets back with Neil on the plane.
So I really, really did not enjoy this book. And I do not recommend it for any other Jane Austen fans
Yep you got it! It’s another post full of all the things I fangirl over! Hope it sparks your interest into checking this stuff out! 🙂
Cinemasins
Cinemasins is a youtube video group in which they have a guy narrate everything that’s wrong in films. Except for the times he is making fun of your favorite films, they are absolutely hilarious. In the newer ones if you watch all the way to the very end, he puts in audio from other films that have similar scenes. I never miss a posting.
I mean look at this man! Can you blame me for being crazy about him?
I am a huge Clint Eastwood fan. I fell in love with him when I was like seven and had to watch everything he was in (with parental supervision of course). And from then on I was obsessed.
Everyone told me it would never happen as I was far, far too young for him. I mean he was 62 when I was born. But I didn’t care.
Eventually I realized it wasn’t meant to be as he was married (although now divorced and single!) and the realistic chances of me meeting him are nil. But no matter what he will be my first crush and the first guy to ever have his picture on my wall. Yep, I had a huge poster of The Outlaw Josey Wales.
He’s my dream man.
And one totally awesome actor.
Yep I love Clint so much that I even spent $15 on a magazine because it was full of photos of him and all about his life. 🙂 I’m obsessed. Was and always will be. 😀
Now I won’t go on about my fav films, as that could go on forever! Even Amazon knows how much I love his work:
I will instead just mention my all-time favorite film of his: Bronco Billy.
This film was directed and starred Clint Eastwood. In this film Clint plays Bronco Billy, an ex-shoe salesman. Bronco Billy had always loved Westerns, Buffalo Bill, and other stories of the West. And he decided to start his own Wild West show, just like the ones Buffalo Bill and Pawnee Bill had. A heiress who married in order to inherit her father’s fortune, finds herself stranded by her husband, and joins up with the show until she can get home. This film is fun, adorable, American, dramatic, i.e. everything you could want in a film.
Anyways, the reason that I love this film is the message of it. Here we have a man who doesn’t feel the need to be confined by his time in life or what people think he can be. Nope, if he wants to do something he’s going to. Even though he might be 100 years too late to be a part of “the West”, it doesn’t matter to him. He is going to achieve his dreams, no matter what.
OMG I fangirled over this movie so hard. In fact I wanted to be in the show. I wanted to be Clint’s assistant and on the wheel that turns and he throughs knives at. I wanted to be in a Wild West Show. In fact, I used to wear Western types clothe and would only wear cowgirl boots.
Yep this is my film.
So while I wil most likely never marry the man or meet him, at least I did get something special from him that I’ll keep forever. I sent him a fan letter and a picture and asked him to autograph it and HE DID!!! YAY!!! I just Love that man!
How It Should Have Ended is another one of those really fun internet video series. They review different films giving them their own twist. These are absolutely hilarious and I never miss a post of these either.
So I started watching this show on accident. I think it started the summer between 9th and 10th grade, but it might have been a year later. I’m not sure. Anyways, I was just flipping channels during summer break while I ate my lunch (really breakfast as I didn’t get up until noon) and stopped at this show. I watched an episode and was hooked, watching the 12-2pm block it had on TNT. I continued this every summer, and when I was in college if I and the TV was free at that time. I LOVED this show.
So the show is about a group of people running the fictional Montecito Hotel & Casino Resort in Las Vegas. They deal with the usual issues: staff problems, card counters, performers, chefs, etc; along with helping each other in personal problems. The one thing that made the show lovable, although completely unrealistic, is that all the people enjoyed helping others and would go the extra mile. Because it is Las Vegas, we also get amazing cameos: Wayne Newton, Jean-Claude Van Damm, Sylvester Stallone, etc.
So the crew:
First we have Ed Deline (James Caan). Ed used to be director of the CIA, but has moved on to being in charge of Security and Operations of the Montecito Casino. He later is promoted to President of Operations and is in charge of everything that goes on in the Casino. He is a major tough guy and not afraid to take anyone out. But on the flipside of that he is a loving father to his daughter Delinda as well as a surrogate father to Nessa and Danny. It’s James Caan just how you like him, barking orders and smashing heads.
Then we have Danny McCoy (Josh Duhamel)
Isn’t this man a dream? Anyways, Danny was simply amazing and the type of guy you want. So Danny was born and raised in Las Vegas, but left to join the Marines. He returns and works for Ed in security, being promoted when Ed is promoted. Danny is sweet, adorable, protective, loving, etc. He does have issues in the relationship department though. He has been in love with his good childhood friend Mary, but she never wanted to have a serious relationship with him. He also dates Delinda, Nessa, and Sam throughout the series. Most of all Danny has a huge heart and is always willing to help others out, something that makes him almost fall for a scheme to take his father’s inheritance. But even though he is sweet, you don’t want to mess with him as he can just as easily take you out. After Ed leaves the Montecito, he is promoted to President of Operations. In the last two seasons, Delinda and him have a committed relationship and are having a child.
Mike Cannon (James Lesure) is an engineer from MIT. Why he works at a casino, I’m not sure. Anyways, he starts out as head valet, but moves on to security, eventually becoming the head when Danny is promoted to president of operations. He’s smart and silly, that perfect combination. When Piper Niekson (the concierge) tries to recruit a Cocktail Tom Cruise type bartender, Mike goes with her. The two get incredibly drunk, and married, of which they tell everyone they annulled, but didn’t really.
Samantha Jane “Sam” Marquez (Vanessa Marcil) is the host of the Casino and it is her job to bring in the whales, i.e. the big gamblers. She is poached from another hotel, but soon fits in with the Montecito family. She is cold and motivated by money, but she also has a soft side, being a “Big Sister”. It turns out she is married to billionaire Casey Manning, but ran away from him as she has issues with commitment. When he dies, she inherits almost everything. She later marries Casey’s brother.
Delinda Deline (Molly Sims) is a genius; although more interested in fashion, makeup, etc. She is not all fluff as she is fluent in French, a graduate of Cordon Bleu, and in charge of entertainment, plus the Food and Beverage Manager. She flits around from guy to guy as she likes to have a good time. In one season her old boyfriend Derek, a doctor, comes back and the two almost get married, but she realizes she is in love with Danny. The two move in together and she gets pregnant. In the last episode they are planning to get married.
Mary Connell (Nikki Cox) is the special events coordinator. She grew up next door to Danny and the two were childhood friends. Mary had a hard life as she was sexually abused by her father, Danny being the one who came to her rescue. He loved her and tried to marry her, but Mary still has a lot of issues regarding love to work out. At one point she meets a rich, nice lawyer and moves in with him, but for reasons unknown, and hinted at being very bad, she leaves him and returns to work at the Montecito. When her stepmother and stepsisters tried to press charges against her father, she helps testify. When he got off,Mary bought a gun, shot him, and took off.
Nessa Holt is from England and was raised by the Deline family. She was the pit boss and worked in the hotel until she discovered her father wasn’t dead, but working for the CIA. She leaves the Montecito to live with him in season 3.
Now their intro is amazing as it is Elvis’ A Little Less Conversation, one of my favorite songs.
But it also got me wondering. I’ve noticed that a lot of movies that take place in Las Vegas, instead of using Elvis’ song Las Vegas, they use A Little Less Conversation. Isn’t that weird? I mean Ocean’s Eleven,21, and Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief did it.
It was a very fun show that I highly recommend!
Leverage
I started watching Leverage because my sister Jessica really liked it. We both became so into it that we watched it ever Wednesday, and even watched the first 15 mins of the show that came on afterwards in order to see the next week’s preview. When it was cancelled I was heartbroken as it was such a great show, it should have gone on for 10 more seasons.
So the story is Nate Ford, the mastermind, putting together this crew in order to help out an airplane designer who’s plans were stolen by his rival. When it turns out that guy lied to him and had them steal his rival’s plans, they team up to get his money and revenge. They end up liking it so much, that the team stays together and helps people out who have been treated wrongly.
First we have the Mastermind, Nate Ford.
He started out as an insurance claims investigator, being the one who tracked down the very people he now works with. He was an amazing investigator, and saved the company millions. That all changed when his son became sick and the company he worked for refused to pay for his treatments. After his son died, he turned to alcohol and lost his job and wife. He is extremely talented in creating these schemes, along with seeing each person’s skills. Fans of Supernatural will spot the same actor who plays Crowley, in this as Sterling, Nate’s nemesis. He and Sophie start dating as the series goes on.
Then we have the Hitter, Eliot Spencer
Eliot is from a small town in the South and left to join the military when he was eighteen. After he got out he couldn’t find work besides a “retrievalist”, that is going in to get objects by taking others out. Besides being extremely strong, he’s quite the hunk (and my favorite character), and incredibly sweet with kids. Eliot is also an amazing singer, as we find out when the team goes in to take out an evil country music record company. He also is an amazing cook, the one thing that kept him from going over completely to the dark side.
The Hacker, Alec Hardisan
Alec was raised in a foster home and is a complete computer and science fiction geek. He does all the hacking, creating false internet information, and in charge of all the groups gadgets. He’s wise-cracking and hilarious. As the series progresses, he and Parker start dating; making one of the cutest TV relationships.
The grifter is Sophie Devereaux
Sophie is an art and antiquities thief, using her skills at acting and manipulation to the highest degree. Now Sophie really wants to be an actress, but while awesome on the job, is horrible when on stage as she is too over the top. At one point in the series she left because she was mad at Nate and sent her friend Tara to take her place, but Tara was horrible. Luckily, Sophie came back and as the series progressed she and Nate started dating.
And last but not least we have the Thief, Parker
Parker has a very sad childhood, moving from foster home to foster home, and encountering a lot of abuse. At 12 she was trained by Archie Leach to become the best thief, pickpocket, safecracker, etc. But due to this childhood she doesn’t know how to talk to people, and instead closes herself off.
And has no clue on how to talk to others. As the series goes on she starts thinking of the Leverage crew as her family, and they try to help her as well. She starts to have feelings for Hardison, but is unable to express them well, which causes a very slooow courtship, but it is the cutest thing!
I love this show and think that any one out there who is a fan of sticking it to the man or just desserts, will love it as well.
The Lizzie Bennet Diaries
I’m going to do a whole separate post on this as part of my Happy Birthday Pride & Prejudice, so I don’t want to spend too much time on it here. I wasn’t even going to include it, but felt bad about leaving it out of my fandom list. It is a modern retelling of Pride & Prejudice set as webisodes. I LOVED it so much and will continue writing on it later.
So I may be a nerd fanning out about this stuff, BUT…
So this will be my last post for a while on fandoms. I have to take a break as my Romance is in the Air: Part III, 14 Days of My Favorite Romantic Film Moments countdown for Valentine’s Day is coming up. As soon as I’m through with that I’ll bring back these fandom posts.
Face it when you hear those words “it is a truth universally acknowledged…” your mind goes immediately to Pride & Prejudice imagining Mrs. Bennet attempting to marry off all her girls.
Jane Austen was such an amazing writer. She creates an opening hook that has you deeply invested in the story within two seconds. This hook is one that has continued to be entertaining for ages. I mean that saying never gets old, but constantly draws you in no matter how many times you have read it.
“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in posession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.”
Unfortunately in today’s time, that no longer seems to be true. Most guys who are well off are more interested in sampling honey pots than buying the actual beehive (like my metaphor? I thought it was a nice change from the milk and cow analogy).
If Mrs. Bennet lived today this would be her immediate reaction:
She’d be like, “go after that man and use every ounce of your feminine wiles to capture him. Don’t let him go.”
It’s interesting how marriage was such an important thing for a women in Regency times, especially since the woman’s main role was to be mother and helpmate, but it is a theme that is a major factor only for our Pride and Prejudice heroines.
What?
In Sense & Sensibility, the mother and daughters are not even concerned about marriage, but are focused on their grief for their dead husband and father or occupied on trying to manage their lives in a poorer state of affairs. In Mansfield Park, no one thinks about who Fanny will marry until the rascal Henry Crawford starts paying attention to her. Emma is determined to remain a spinster and her father is thoroughly pleased with that. In Northanger Abbey, Catherine’s family never brings up the question of who and when Catherine should marry. By the time Persuasion starts, Anne has already turned down two proposals but her extremely vain father is not worried over her lack of a martial state but that she isn’t up to his standards of beauty. Only in Pride and Prejudice do we see a mother so determined to marry off her children. Even with the Elliot estate (Persuasion) being entailed, the Bennets are the only ones who talk about their worry on having no male children.
What also is interesting is that even though “a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife”; there are many male characters in her novels who have money and do not wish to marry. There is Willoughby, Tom Bertram, Henry Crawford, Captain Tilney, and Mr Elliot (the younger).
Mr. Willoughby only marries because his aunt was threatening to disinherit him, and he does not want to be a poor man (whether or not he would have actually married Marianne is a post for another day.)
Mr. Elliot is a widower having fun-slightly interested in Anne, and only decides to run off with Mrs. Clay to make sure his uncle doesn’t have a son (trying to protect his inheritance.)
Captain Tilney continues enjoying any woman who comes his way, marriage being the last thing on his mind.
Tom Bertram has no thought on marriage until his close encounter with death causes him to rethink his life.
Henry Crawford is a little different being a Sebastian Valmont-esque character-never interested in marriage but just trying to play around with women, falls for Fanny and tries to win her affections, but ends up creating a huge scandal with her cousin and never marrying.
Of course her books are also filled with men who want to get married, after all if they weren’t would we love them as much as we do?
One of the most intriguing things about this phrase is the statement in “want of a wife”. Want’s two most used definitions are “have a desire to possess” or “a lack or deficiency”. Therefore this statement applies to both Binglely (as one who desires a wife) and Darcy (has a lack of one) along with all the other Austen men. Every Austen hero and villain starts the book off in want of a wife as they do not have one. And by the end of each book all Austen heroes, and some villains, have one.
And just like any other mother, Mrs. Bennet can’t help hoping that her daughters will catch the eye and heart of a single man in possession of a good fortune.
If you are interested in buying a shirt like Lizzie Bennet, Zazzle and Cafepress sell them and many other Jane Austen inspired products
For the previous post, go to 
janeaustenrunsmylife 