Just Like the Beginning

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It Doesn’t Exist

Ever feel as if finding the right guy is impossible?

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It’s like every guy you know is a loser.

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That is if you can even meet single men.

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They have the worst lines (I wrote a whole post on that). I mean one time I had the same guys in a corvette hit on me two days in a row. You’d think they’d get the point that I’m not interested and that they should really invest in some new lines.

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Not to mention how guys seem to treat girls these days. The act like you are just a commodity and that you need to be giving of your whole self just because they’re willing to drop a couple bucks for food.

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And if you refuse they call you names and say that you are being a prude, poor sport, b*****, or worse.

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No wonder we girls are obsessed with fictional men.

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It sometimes feels as if you will never find anybody. As Marianne in Sense and Sensibility puts it:

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I mean aren’t there any good men anymore?

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But don’t give up.

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That dream guy is out there. It may take him a while, but eventually you two will meet up.

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For more on Marianne Dashwood, go to Some Things Never Change

For more Sarah Dessen, go to The Final Chapter

For more on Sabrina the Teenage Witch, go to Food, Food, Food!

You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Potato: Aliens in the Attic (2009)

You’re gonna need a bigger potato.

First I want to say happy 50th! This is my 50th post! I never thought I would make so many in such a few months 😀

So I know this isn’t really a Halloweeny film; but it has aliens in it so it counts. I was up early this morning and was flipping channels and this came on. I remember when this first came out in theaters, I never saw it as I thought it was going to be extremely dumb and full of childish slapstick comedy. It was full of that, and it was pretty dumb at times; but it ended up being better than I thought it would be. I actually only came in at the end of the film, so it took a while for me to get a sense of what was going on.

So these aliens invade, and only the kids are aware of this; as always the adults are stupidly blind to anything going on.

When I came into the story, the aliens had attached these mind control devices to one of the kids, Bethany’s, boyfriend Ricky. There was also one attached to the Grandma, but the kids were controlling it. The twin boys were incredibly adorable and remind me of my nephew who is obsessed with video games.

The fight between the two, was purely structured to garnish cheap laughs from children as they watch an elderly lady kick butt.

The only thing that makes this scene even funny is the lovely Doris Roberts. I love her so much!

Bethany comes in at the end and sees her boyfriend kicked through the basement. The other kids tell her that aliens have invaded which she finds hard to believe. She goes to talk to her loser boyfriend, which we find out is a liar and cheating on her. He breaks up with her and takes off.

The adults discover the worn-torn, destroyed room and immediately yell at the oldest kid in the room, Tom (Bethany is in the basement). All the kids get sent up to their rooms as they are being punished for destroying everything.

Bethany reconvenes with them upstairs trying to do something. Tom has given up, as he feels they can do nothing to save Earth. Bethany tries to get everyone to go fight, but they won’t follow anyone but Tom.

Tom I thought was very attractive. Super sexy as he was played by Carter Jenkins. Anyways, Tom is now encouraged and they go down to the basement to defeat the aliens.

When they get there they discover their cousin Jake, played by Austin Butler. (Where has he gone? I haven’t seen him in anything recently.) He was kidnapped by the Zarkonian aliens and knows they are trying to create some kind of machine. The kids had become friends with one of the aliens, Spark, and he is the techno one that they are forcing to build the machine.

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They are about to give up again, when Jake comes up with a mentos/cola bomb. They shoot them at the aliens which knock them all out except for the commander. Tom takes him out with his potato gun, which accidentally knocks him into the machine they were forcing Sparks to create.

Everyone cheers at this, but then Sparks tells them that it is not good, it makes the commander big!

They have to try and battle him while the other kids handle the small aliens. Jake is able to distract the commander while Tom calibrates the mathematic equation to shoot the commander with a mind controlling device. While he is doing this, one of the other aliens increases his size and the commander and him have an epic fight.

While they duke it out Sparks reverses the machine, making anything that goes through it little. Tom sends them both through the machine, with the “ugly” alien going off with his girlfriend, while the commander is seemingly zapped into nothingness.

They have stopped the aliens, but there is still an invasion coming. One the adults stupidly think are a meteor shower.

Sparks calls the aliens and tells them to retreat. After a tearful goodbye, he goes home to be with his family. All the kids enjoy the rest of their vacation, having finally bonded and become a perfect unit.

Cheesy, yes. The very, very, end was hilarious though. 😀

Hope you enjoyed that lighthearted post. More posts to come. 10 days until Halloween!

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To start Horrorfest from the beginning, go to I Don’t Belong In the World

For the previous post, go to Quite a Horror Story

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For more on aliens, go to When Potatoes Go Bad

For more on channel surfing, go to Secrets Are Great, Unless You Get Caught

For more on video games, go to Push All the Buttons!

Forney Hull: Makes Stalking Adorable

I don’t know how many of you out there have seen the film Where the Heart Is, but it is an amazing film. It’s about 17 year old Novalee Nation, who is scared of fives (bad stuff happens to her when fives abound), who is pregnant, and has a loser boyfriend. Her boyfriend ends up dumping her off at the Walmart in the middle of nowhere. There Novalee lives in the Walmart, eventually having her baby there. The film chronicles her starting a new life there in Oklahoma, and all the characters she encounters. There’s Sister Husband, the Christian who takes her in; Moses Whitecotton, a photographer who helps Novalee achieve her dreams, Lexie Coop the ever fertile woman in search of the perfect man, and Forney Hull, the educated, caring best friend. The film also chronicles what happens to Novalee’s deadbeat boyfriend as he goes from prison mate to rising country star. Novalee goes through many twists and turns until she discovers true love and the meaning of friendship. To watch the trailer click here.  To see the first half of the film go here. Sorry but that’s all I could find online.

Forney Hull is one of the best characters in the book  and the film. In the beginning he is seen as a harsh, rude character; but we see him soften as we learn more about him.

He genuinely cares for Novalee, and takes care of her in the novel. He cooks her dinner everyday, and brings her books to read about mothering. However he also follows her.

While stalking someone is creepy, when Forney does it,  it’s cute. He first becomes her friend, and then follows her not because he is a creep; but because he is worried about her. He knows she is alone and pregnant in a new town. In the movie, however, they don’t show that relationship and it instead looks a tad more creepy than caring. He ends up saving Novalee’s life and her baby by delivering it himself. He comes crashing into the Walmart, it is such a great scene.

From there Forney becomes not only Novalee’s best friend, but also Americus’, Novalee’s baby, quasi-godfather. He also is deeply in love with Novalee and tries to tell her how he feels. He is always there for Novalee and Americus no matter what.

Aw! So cute!

And he is so good with kids. The way he is with Americus is just darling!

“Americus: Forney, if you give a cow chocolate will you get chocolate milk?
Forney Hull: Yeah. And if you spin a cow around real fast you’ll get whipped cream.
Americus: Wow! You know a lot.
Forney Hull: Well, I work in the library!”

As the film progresses we hear that Forney has a sad backstory. He was studying to be a history teacher when his father died. He then had to come back home, and take care of his alcoholic sister, the librarian. When she dies, Forney is given the freedom to do whatever he wants, but the only thing he wants to do is stay in Oklahoma with Novalee. He is willing to work in a plastics factory, just to be with her and Americus.

Forney is the all-around perfect man. He is kind, caring, loving, sweet, intelligent, etc. Novalee ends up letting him slip through her fingers, scared that she could never measure up. But Forney doesn’t care that she didn’t finish high school, or that she got pregnant at 17 and was living in a Wal-Mart. He cares about Novalee as a person, loving her and her spirit.

The end is so adorable! They finally get reunited and Forney’s dreams come true!

Novalee Nation: It’s too late, isn’t it, Forney?
Forney Hull: Too late for what?
Novalee Nation: I lied to you, when you asked me if I loved you, and I said no. Remember?
Forney Hull: Yes.
Novalee Nation: I lied. It wasn’t true, I-I love you. It’s just I lied because I thought you deserved something better.
Forney Hull: Something better than you? Novalee, there isn’t anything better than you.
[they kiss]

Here’s the end scene. Sorry it is not of better quality.

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For more films based on books, go to A Fright on Halloween Night

For more non-Austen films, go to Insults

For more bookish posts, go to Darcy’s Dream Date

For more on guys who can cook, go to Squeak, Squeakity, Squeak-ems

For more on the perfect guy, go to My New BF