The Final Chapter

So if you have been following my blog you probably wonder why my attitude from my ex went from I’m happy it’s over to he’s a cheating, lying,

wordICan't say Toy Story

Some of you are probably like that is every relationship, but no that’s not the reason. Let me back up and just give you who are new to following a brief recap.

So my ex and I broke up last year and it was not the best ending for me. You see I was away at school and we were trying to make a long-distance relationship work.

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I had thought things were fine, until Michael, my ex started talking to me less and less. I went down to see him and he took an extra shift. When I was coming back for Thanksgiving he wasn’t sure he would be able to fit me in.

Now for all you people (and me now) it is clear that this guy was obviously moving on from me. But of course, I didn’t see it as:

Love_Is_Blind_by_Luquicas

So he was talking to me less and less and I was just so confused by it.

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My grandfather died, and still barely any peep from him. I know, my grandfather dies and he can’t see me or comfort me. What a major loser, am I right?

Jerk

So I go surprise attack him and see him, trying to get an answer out of him why he was so distant. Did he even want to stay together? You know, the usual questions. I mean I was so confused and unhappy and emotional, I just wanted the truth. We ended up breaking up. Now at first I was completely heartbroken, and there are earlier posts which detail that phase of my life.

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In fact I stupidly blamed myself for most of it. Maybe if I had done this differently or this we would still be together.

what-not-to-say-to-broken-hearted-girl-3what went wrong holiday

Luckily, I eventually realized it wasn’t all my fault, in fact I was a great girlfriend. I sent him care packages, I treated him wonderfully and he was the one who was acting wrong and not like a boyfriend at all. I mean I got hit on by tons of guys and could have cheated on him or passed him up for someone “better”, but I didn’t as I really cared about him. I’m not gonna lie, it took a while, but I eventually got over him.

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I realized that breaking up was better than being in a relationship that was becoming non-existent.

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I mean he couldn’t even get up the balls to break up with me. Like what was he expecting me to do  over Christmas break? Never come around?

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But then I found out something. You see, Michael was cheating on me those past few months of our relationship. When I found that out I was incensed! I wanted to hurt him so bad!

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I was seriously angry. I would imagine myself going and punching his lights out.

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I really wanted to make him pay. In fact it took every ounce of my will to not go to his work and teach him a lesson.

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Now some of you this might seem a normal response, but for those of you who are shocked or appalled at my confession, let me tell you why this rankled me so much. You see I have always vetted the guys I date very throughly, so much that many don’t make it far with me. Yes, I’m picky but I just don’t want any old boy.

HighstandardsExtraordinary

And I had allowed Michael to get farther than any other boy had. I became his girlfriend, which is something I had always stayed away from becoming as I was always afraid of picking the wrong guy. With Michael, I didn’t think we were soul mates or meant to be together forever, but he just seemed so right.

he gets me

Only for me to find out I was dead wrong. Extremely wrong. You see when he asked me to be his girlfriend I told him I had three rules he had to agree to for me to say yes. The first was to NEVER, EVER cheat on me. Cheating is just a horrible thing to do as it screws people up for a long time. Second to call or skype me once a week, and third visit me at least once a semester. He agreed, especially to the first rule as he had been cheated on before and knew what it felt like.

That horrible guy!

GoldenGirlsEat&DieTrash

How could he treat me like that if he knew how it felt! I was enraged! But slowly, I got over it.

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It sucks that the first guy I gave my heart to turned out to be such a Wickham:

Darcy Wickham Pride&Prejudice

But I’m not going to let him have any more power over my life. I already wasted time thinking, crying, plotting revenge, etc on him.

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It sucks that he turned out to be such a rotter, but that’s life right? You can’t protect yourself from everything.

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Bitterness, resentment, and revenge may seem like your best friends, but they really aren’t doing you any favors.

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After all, they’ve already misused you, why let them continue that. It is always better to move on.

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And I’m not letting that guy hurt me anymore. After all I got the best deal. I love his family, and they still love me. Plus I’m amazing! Eventually, maybe not anytime soon, but one day he’ll realize what a catch I was and kick himself for letting me get away! Your loss!

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And someone else’s gain.

And you are out of my thoughts forever.

I don't need you

And that would be the end of the post, except for one thing. I did see him again. And no I didn’t hit him or injure him.

You see every year my family goes to see the free Christmas play in town. And this year guess who had the lead? Michael.

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Grab your torches and sharpen your pitchforks!

No I’m kidding. It actually wasn’t that bad. I saw his relatives again who I absolutely adore. I saw him and to be honest I didn’t care. I will admit that at one time the urge to kick him really hard came over me:

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But it was a really small urge.

In fact seeing him again, I actually wasn’t impressed. No heartfelt longing to get back together. No breaking down and crying. In fact, nothing at all.

OverThemNewPerspectiveNothingSpecial

Now some of you might be wondering why I haven’t said anything about the girl he cheated on me with. I don’t really feel as if I can say anything because I don’t really know her role in this. Did she know he had a girlfriend? Did she try purposely to break us up? And to be honest, if she was actively involved than she is a horrible person, as scamming on somebody else’s person is just down right low. But, the person in the relationship is more at fault as they should know better.

And you know what, whoever is at fault, they’re going to get what’s coming to them. What goes around comes around. I don’t have to settle the score as someone else will. What’s important is to concentrate on me, and the next phase of my life.

Some of you may think, that’s a lot of personal information. Aren’t I worried if the guy finds out and reads it? Well, first of all:

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And secondly, if he wanted me to say something nice, he should have been nicer.

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Now I’m planning this to be the very last post on my ex, I’m not planning on seeing him ever, and I don’t think I will write another thing on him. Now think is the operative word as every time I thought the Verne Saga was over, he would come around again.

So I am going to end this last ex post with something I want you all to remember. If you have ever been hurt by someone, let it go and never, ever let it take over your life or destroy your personality.

HeartneverhardensCharlesDickens

Stay golden!

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For more musings of me, go to Concentrated Awesome

For more on getting over a broken heart, go to If It Means A Lot to You

For more on Nicholas Sparks, go to I Don’t Want to Be in Love (Dance Floor Anthem)

For more on Sarah Dessen, go to I Will Survive

For more on Steve Maraboli, go to Love Will Find a Way

For more of my favorite quotes, go to The Many Reincarnations of Me

I Will Survive

I Will Survive

This brings us to our last post on the “Getting Over a Heartbreak” series:

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31) I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor

So here we are on the last post. I’m actually pretty sad to see these postings end. Now don’t get me wrong they are a lot of work and it will be nice to have a reprieve before Horrorfest III begins (which I expect you all to check out. You’re gonna love it, I know it!). But it was a lot of fun as I was able to cover all kinds of my favorite songs. It was a lot of emotions to go through as well, especially those earlier posts.

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But they have been a lot of fun, and I’ve had an absolutely fantastic time.

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Now onto the song. So I Will Survive was written by Freddie Perren and Dino Fekaris; and released by Gloria Gaynor in 1978. It became huge after it came out, not only being one of the most popular disco songs, but being Gaynor’s biggest hit. Yes, it is Disco and Disco rocks!

Mystery Men Disco is not dead disco is life

It scored #1 on Billboard Top 100 in 1979.  It has been covered by tons of artists and featured in all kinds of film.

The best thing about this song is that it hits every emotion you express after a breakup; sadness, anguish, fear, lonliness, anger, resentment, and eventually reaching the point where you don’t care anymore. You are over them.

Over You

You will survive

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Not only does this song have powerful lyrics, but the music itself is amazingly upbeat and really gets you pumped up and ready for anything. After all:

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At first I was afraid I was petrified

afraid pertrified
Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side

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But then I spent so many nights
Thinking how you did me wrong
And I grew strong
And I learned how to get along

I'm through

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And so you’re back
from outer space
I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed that stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second you’d be back to bother me
Go on now go, walk out the door

Get out
Just turn around now
‘Cause you’re not welcome anymore

I don't know you
Weren’t you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
Do you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die?

IWillSurviveGG

Oh no not I. I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love

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I know I’ll stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live

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I’ve got all my love to give and I’ll survive
I will survive! Hey, Hey!

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It took all strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying’ hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart

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And I spent oh so many nights
Just feeling sorry for myself, I used to cry

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But now I hold my head up high
And you see me, somebody new
I’m not that chained up little person still in love with you

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And so you felt like dropping in
And just expect me to be free
Now I’m saving all my lovin’ for someone who’s lovin’ me

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LoveTrueCinderella
Go on now go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
‘Cause you’re not welcome anymore
Weren’t you the one who tried to break me with goodbye
Do you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die?

Oh no not I. I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love
I know I’ll stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my love to give and I’ll survive
I will survive, Oh

Go on now go, walk out the door
Just turn around now
‘Cause you’re not welcome anymore
Weren’t you the one who tried to crush me with goodbye
Do you think I’d crumble
Did you think I’d lay down and die?

Oh no not I. I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love
I know I’ll stay alive
I’ve got all my life to live
I’ve got all my love to give and I’ll survive
I will survive,
I will survive!

IWillSurvive

musicnotes

Here is a complete list of the “Getting Over a Heartbreak” series:

1) If It Means A Lot to You by A Day to Remember

2) The End by Silverstein

3) I Don’t Love You by My Chemical Romance

4) Now You’re Gone by Everyday Sunday

5) Heartbreak Hotel by Elvis Presley

6) Good or Bad by Action Item

7) Love Stinks by J. Geils Band

8) That’s What You Get by Paramore

9) Chin Up Kid by Forever the Sickest Kids 

10) I’ll Be Alright Without You by Journey

11) For a Pessimist, I’m Pretty Optimistic

12) Missing You by John Waite

13) Gone Forever by Three Days Grace

14) Put Me Out by The Used

15) But It’s Alright by Huey Lewis & the News

16) Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson

17) Move Along by All-American Rejects

18) Up and Up (Acoustic) by Reliant K

19) Red Rubber Ball by The Cyrkle

20) Over You by Daughtry

21) I Don’t Wanna Be in Love (Dance Floor Anthem)

22) Here I Go Again by Whitesnake

23) Love Will Find a Way by Pablo Cruise

24) Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey

25) The Lining is Silver by Relient K

26) Whip It by Devo

27) Be Good to Yourself by Journey

28) Any Way You Want It by Journey

29) Unbound by Avenged Sevenfold

30) Here I Go by Relient K

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For more on Gloria Gaynor, go to I’ll Be Alright Without You

For more on Margaret Mitchell, go to At the End of the Rainbow

For more on Sarah Dessen, go to Happy B-day!

For more on Friends, go to Pizza Power

For more on Cinderella, go to Episode VI: Return Of the My Favorite Movie Lines’ List

I’ll Be Alright Without You by Journey

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You probably know where this post is headed. Yep, its the next step in the Heartbreak playlist. We are now on:

Journey

10) I’ll Be Alright Without You by Journey

So back in December I did a post I’ll Be Alright Without You, of which I talked a lot about how this song really expressed my feelings. I only added it in this line up because it went well in the playlist.

Music

So like I said before the lyrics are really beautiful and truly express trying to get over someone.

I’ve been thinking ’bout the times You walked out on me There were moments I’d believe, you were there Do I miss you, or am I lying to my self again

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I do these things… (It’s all because of you) I keep holding on, but I’ll try (try not to think of you) Love don’t leave me lonely I’ll be alright without you

There’ll be someone else…I keep tellin’ myself I’ll be alright without you Oh…love’s an empty face, I can’t replace (you don’t need it)

journey I'll be alright wout you

 

People wonderin’ why we broke apart The great pretender here I go again These things I do (It’s all because of you)

I’ll keep holdin’ but I’ll try (try not to think of you) All I wanted was to hold you I’ll be alright without you There’ll be someone else, I keep tellin’ myself

I’ll be alright without you Love’s an empty face…Oh I’ve got to replace I’ll be alright without you There’ll be someone else, I keep tellin’ myself

I’ll be alright without you Oh…love’s an empty place, I can still see your face I’ll be alright

Breaking up is just hard to do (if it wasn’t there wouldn’t be a song titled that), and this just expresses exactly what one goes through. Remember you were fine before that person came into your life and you’ll be fine after.

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After all:

Best Revenge

musicnotes

To start the Heartbreak series from the beginning, go to If It Means a Lot to You

To go to the previous post, go to Chin Up Kid

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Other posts you might be interested in:

For more on my fav music, go to That’s What You Get

For more of my fav quotes, go to The Two Times to Be Over

For more on ’80’s music, check out Love Stinks

Good or Bad

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Here we are again, another song in the heartbreak series.

Good or Bad Action Item

6) Good or Bad by Action Item

So I got into Action Item, after I heard the Vans Warped Tour 2013 Compilation album, and loved them!! (This song is actually off that album.) I couldn’t find too much background on the song, so I’m heading right to the lyrics!

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I really like this song because it expresses that questioning you had about ever starting the relationship that broke your heart. Was it good or bad? Should you have ever even dated that person and missed out on all the fun times? Are the good memories worth the pain of breakup? In the end, is there really any answer? Is it good or bad; or is it something in between?

Is it good or bad? To fall in love so fast
It heals until it hurts
It’s a gift and it’s a curse
Oh it’s bittersweet
What you do to me
Is it okay, to be scared but still feel safe?

ActionItem brokenhearted


Is it good or bad, yeah yeah yeah
Is it good or bad, yeah yeah yeah

I’m not a saint, no, and I don’t claim to be, yeah
Love will make you reckless, wild and free, yeah
What’s a heart if it doesn’t get used?
What’s the point? What’s the use?
So you said show me something new, things I never knew…
Like when we were kids, take me somewhere I’ve never been

ActionItemLOVE

Is it good or bad? To fall in love so fast

It heals until it hurts
It’s a gift and it’s a curse
Oh it’s bittersweet
What you do to me
Is it okay, to be scared but still feel safe?

Is it good or bad, yeah yeah yeah
Is it good or bad, yeah yeah yeah

So I took your hand, we ran through the street lights
And when you stopped me, that was when I realized
That I can learn everything from your lips
About you and me kissing, being told every secret kept
Everything you did you broken the same
Cause love just leads to pain

ActionItemLOVE

ActionItem broken heart

Is it good or bad? To fall in love so fast
It heals until it hurts
It’s a gift and it’s a curse
Oh it’s bittersweet
What you do to me
Is it okay, to be scared but still feel safe?

Is it good or bad?

bestrong

Take these words to heart:

pathinlife

musicnotes

To go to the beginning of the Heartbreak series, go to If It Means A Lot to You

To go to the previous post, go to Heartbreak Hotel

musicnotes

For other posts you might be interested in:

For more songs I like, go to Now You’re Gone

For more of my favorite quotes, go to Girl on Fire

For more on Audrey Hepburn, go to Your Secret is Safe With Me

For more on James Joyce, check out At the End of the Rainbow