Until Annulment Do Us Part: Divorce and Annulment in the Regency Era

So the last chapter of Desire and Decorum, was really bothering me. In it it you, the main character, discovers that you were not illegitimate as your parents were married, but that they were annulled before you were born. Your father still wants to write you into the will but I’m questioning the whole legality of it all.

So I decided it was time to do some research and see if I could find some answers.

Before the Matrimonial Causes Act of 1857 divorces had to go through the Church and Parliament. The church would only give legal separation, while if you wanted a real divorce in order to remarry you would need to go through Parliament as well. Parliament divorces were very, very expensive and you had to take legal action in a three courts: ecclesiastical (church), common-law court, and finally Parliament.

No amount of money could give you a quiet divorce, as any divorce was a huge scandal as newspapers would play it up. And it would be a stain on both spouses’ characters, although men would get over it must faster (think of Maria Bertram-Rushworth in Mansfield Park).

So we know divorce was difficult, but what about an annulment? I had to keep digging.

I can’t stop myself.

The church occasionally did some annulments in certain cases. The annulments were only granted if the marriage wasn’t consummated (they didn’t sleep together), a man married his dead wife’s sister (it was seen as too close to a relative although marrying your first cousin was alright 🤷🏻‍♀️ ), or if it turned out one of the couple had committed bigamy.

So none of those reasons would apply here for the game as the character’s mother was pregnant (obviously they consummated), no previous marriage had taken place to invoke a “too close relationship”, and there was no bigamy. Of course the grandpa could have said that she was sleeping around, but that wouldn’t grant his son an annulment he would have had to be granted a divorce and the game was specific to annulment. It was clear, more digging must be done.

Annulment by not consummating the relationship was really hard to prove. More often then not either the husband or wife had to be examined and declared impotent. This rarely happened as it had to be proven by a medical examination, which as I’m sure as you can imagine, very few people would succumb to having.

Annulments could also be granted if there was an error in name on the marriage certificate, they were too young and married without parental consent (they would have to go to Gretna Greene to do that), or if they were deceived as to who they were marrying. All of which don’t apply here.

Hmm…

Insanity was another route for annulment but it was very tricky to prove (and still is today) as one would have to prove that the person was insane at the time of the marriage. For instance look at the case of Mr. Rochester in Jane Eyre, as he didn’t suspect she was crazy in the beginning (her family hid it well) he can never get a divorce or annulment and instead has to live with a crazy woman who is constantly trying to kill him. Also most families would fight this route as being named insane would taint an entire family and family line as well.

If a woman’s marriage was annulled, she was reduced from the status of wife to concubine, and any children the couple had were declared illegitimate. So that tracks right in the game, as my character is still illegitimate. But could an illegitimate inherit? And I still haven’t figured out how the grandfather had them annulled.

Hmmm…

So I did some more digging and discovered that if a couple was annulled the woman would have a ruined reputation and:

“Also, any children of an annulled marriage become bastards (who cannot inherit or be declared legitimate at the whim of the peer) and likewise outcasts of society.”

Kristen Kostner, “A Primer on Regency Divorce and Annulments,” Kristen Kostner (blog), entry posted October 11, 2018, accessed July 22, 2021,

So it looks like that plot point in the last chapter is impossible. The MC/Catherine would never be able to inherit, even with my father writing me into the will. The only way I could would be if I was to prove that the annulment never legally took place and my stepmother’s marriage is invalid.

This does kind of kill the spirit of the game for me as it only took me a day to research this, which any of their staff could have easily done. But maybe there are more twists coming, I guess I’ll just have to keep playing to find out.

Hmm…?

Sources:

Field, Alina K. "10 Facts about Marriage and Divorce in Historical England." Simply Romance (blog). Entry posted September 16, 2014. Accessed July 22, 2021.

Grace, Maria. "Divorce, Regency style." English History Authors (blog). Entry posted January 11, 2017. Accessed July 22, 2021.

Hatch, Donna. "Annulments, Separations, Divorce and Scandal." Historical Hussies (blog). Entry posted May 3, 2013. Accessed July 22, 2011

Kostner, Kristen. "A Primer on Regency Divorce and Annulments." Kristen Kostner (blog). Entry posted October 11, 2018. Accessed July 22, 2011

For more on the Regency era, go to Modesto Jane Con: Dressing the Regency Lady

Book Club Picks: A Common Life, The Wedding Story

So I have fallen behind with my posts, but as you know I started a book club last year:

Every month we read a book and I do a little post on the book we read and discussed. What can I say, I just love books.

 

There is no theme, other than with each month, a different member gets to pick a book, whichever one they want. One has chosen to read a few books from The Mitford Years series. So far we had read the first and second books in series. They decided to skip the other books to go to book six, which was written later but is supposed to go between book two, A Light in the Window and three, These High Green Hills.

A Common Life: The Wedding Story (The Mitford Years #6) by Jan Karon

This book is set in the fictional town of Mitford, North Carolina. The last book centered around the Vicar, Father Tim as he is contemplating at age 60 if he should continue or retire. In that year he faces all kinds of changes from a dog adopting him, taking in a child, jewel thieves, a fake antiquities ring, health changes, a new neighbor/love interest, all kinds of secrets being revealed, and more. This town and Father Tim will never be the same.

The second book, Father Tim and Cynthia have become boyfriend and girlfriend. But when their relationship becomes a long distance one, he begins to pull away from her because of his fear of getting hurt. Also, a local widow is trying to catch him, using every ploy and plot to ensnare him. And to top it all off, a relative from Ireland has followed him home and is staying with him, but something about her is not right as she spends all her time in her room.

When Karon was writing the series, she continued the next book, book three they were already married and continued to write about their lives. However, people love a good wedding.

And they wanted to know what Father Tim’s was like. Will Father Tim fall apart when he takes his vows? Will Cynthia make it to the church on time? Who’ll arrange the flowers and bake the wedding cake? And will Uncle Billy’s prayers for a great joke be answered in time for the reception?

This book was so adorable and a total fan service. We got everything we wanted.

Yay!

I loved seeing Father Tim have to go through all the marriage things-planning, counseling, etc. And the little things about money, the wedding night, etc. Here is a 60 year old man who never was married and is going through all this for the first time. But hey, he was careful in finding just the right person.

I loved the part when one of the ladies in the community is hoping to bake the cake for the wedding, but hasn’t heard from the couple asking her to do it. She works herself up into a lather, becoming so angry-but then is asked and is completely speechless-a hilarious scene.

It is such a fun adorable book, that of you loved any of these books in the series you need to check it out.

For more book club picks, go to Book Club Picks: The Girls of Atomic City: The Untold Story of the Women Who Helped Win World War II

For more books by Jan Karon, go to Book Club Picks: A Light in the Window

For more in The Mitford Years, go to Book Club Picks: At Home in Mitford

For more weddings, go to Those Aren’t Men They Are the Living Dead: White Zombie (1932)

For more Jane Austen Quotes, go to Most Romantic Moment In Real Life

So I was writing this review I decided it was the perfect time to share my own bit of news. I just got engaged.

I know, right. Its amazing that I AM going to be married. After all, I thought like Marianne Dashwood:

But what can I say, sometimes life takes turns we don’t expect, we meet people who change our way of seeing the world, we fall in love.

We meet in May of last year and started dating five months later. I know he is the right guy for me.

And I’m right for him.

Aw!

We are to be married in two months! Its not a lot of time, but I’ll get it done. The most important thing is we will be together.

I could go on, but:

So I will end on this:

 

,

Who Says I Have to Stop: Fireproof (2008)

Romantic Moment #1

Fireproof (2008)

So I have always been a giant Kirk Cameron fan. I loved Mike Seaver on Growing Pains and after he became a Christian and switched to Christian films-well I watched every thing he was in. So when Fireproof came out in theaters, I was there. And when the DVD went on sale, I was the first at the Christian bookstore to buy it.

Anyways, I actually planned on picking a moment from this for last year’s Romance is in the Air, but didn’t get a chance to.

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So the story is of married couple Caleb (Kirk Cameron) and Catherine Holt (Erin Bethea), who have been falling further and further apart.

Caleb is a fireman who feels as if his wife doesn’t care about him, support him, or respects him. Nothing he does is good enough for her and all they do is fight, fight, fight.

Catherine feels as if Caleb doesn’t love and respect her as he is saving money towards his dream of a boat instead of using it for them, and because of his addiction. When a doctor at the hospital she works at starts paying a lot of attention to her, she eagerly responds to it.

Both are ready for divorce, but Caleb’s father comes to him and asks him to try one last thing. He gives him a book called The Love Dare, that includes a 40 Day challenge, with scriptures, to try and help heal their marriage and hearts.

Psalm 147:3

At first Caleb is only half-hearted, doing barely anything to complete his “daily challenge.”

But then he commits himself to God, God begins working on his heart, and he is all in.

But will it be enough to convince Catherine? Will he be able to win Catherine’s heart back? Or is it too late and the relationship has ended?

***Spolier Alert***

Most Romantic Moment: Who Says I Have to Stop

This moment comes at the very end of the film. Caleb has been trying and trying, but after all they have been through Catherine doesn’t even care, she doesn’t want to care because she is afraid of getting hurt again.

One day she is sick and Caleb comes to care for her-bringing her medicine and soup and the like. But Catherine won’t accept his help, she is actually pretty nasty to him.

But Caleb takes it from her. And this upsets Catherine that she reveals why she is so angry now. She find his Love Dare and feels all this is fake.

Catherine Holt: So, what day are you on?

Caleb Holt: 43.

Catherine Holt: There’s only 40.

Caleb Holt: Who says I have to stop?

Catherine Holt: Caleb, I don’t know how to process this. This is not normal for you.

Caleb Holt: Welcome to the new normal.

It doesn’t matter to him that the challenge has “ended” he wants to continue to show how much he loves and cares for her.

This is so romantic!

So awesome!

And even though it is hard and he has received nothing back, he continues to show his love and devotion to his wife.

For more on Kirk Cameron, go to Fandom Love

For more bible verses, go to Book Club Picks: A Wrinkle in Time

For more Christian films, go to It Feels So Good to See the Bad Guys Scared for a Change: Hangman’s Curse (2003)

Mawwiage. Mawwiage is What Bwings us Togethew Today

So what do I look for in a potential life mate?

QuotePrincessBride

No I’m just kidding. That’s not what defines marriage for me. This is:

Star Wars

Just kidding. Marriage is more than shared interests. There is so much more than needs to be a part of it.

marriage

And of course, being a Christian, I’m also looking for this:

PickedbyGod

Yep, eventually I’ll find the right guy.

SomedayPrinceWillComeMostLikelyLost

And I believe when I do find him, we’ll stay together forever.

FirsttMarriage

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For more on relationships, go to It’s Not Old…It’s Vintage

For more on The Princess Bride, go to A Pirate’s Life is the Life for Me

For more on Star Wars, go to A Very Merry Star Wars Christmas

For more Relationship Rules, go to Growing Up is Hard to Do

For more quotes, go to These Shoes Were Made for Walking

We Wish You A Merry Christmas

For the past two years I have done a countdown post of 25 of my favorite films that feature Christmas. I was going to do another one this year, but was too tired from yesterday’s post. So instead I am going to do something different, I’m going to finish up our 25 Carols of Christmas posts.

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But before I do that, I want to stop and acknowledge who’s birthday today is, other than Jesus. Today marks the 200th birthday of Emma.

emma

This book was published in 1815, and changed literature. Yes, what started out as a character that only Austen was supposed to like, turned into something beloved by all.

emma

From her radical views on marriage and love:

Emma

To her crazy schemes that always ended comedically.

EmmaWoodhouse

And let’s not forget the handsome Knightley, the purveyor of common sense and one handsome hunk.

Emma Mr.knightley2

Happy 200 Emma! Here’s to another!

Emma

And a Merry Christmas to all!!!

At Christmas

For more on Emma, go to Waiter, There’s Some Disney in My Jane Austen

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Now for today’s Christmas Carol. It was hard to choose the final one, but in the end I decided to go with my absolute favorite Christmas Carol, We Wish You a Merry Christmas.

This Christmas Carol came about from the tradition of wealthy Englishmen giving treats to Christmas carolers, such as fig, raisin, or other type of pudding.

I just love the beat and the lyrics. This song is so much fun and truly helps you wish a Merry Christmas.

So in that case I wish you all a Merry Christmas!

ChristmasfromJaneAusten

 For more on We Wish You a Merry Christmas, go to On the 6th, 5th, 4th, 3rd, 2nd, & 1st Day ’til Christmas: The Music of Christmas

For more Christmas posts, go to 25 More Films of Christmas

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It was hard choosing just 25 Christmas Carols to post on, but if you would like to listen to my choices follow the links below.

All I Want for Christmas is You by Mariah Carey

Angels We Have Heard on High by REO Speedwagon

Christmas Don’t Be Late by Alvin & the Chipmunks

The Christmas Song (Merry Christmas to You) by Bing Crosby

A Cowboy’s Christmas by Wayne Newton

Do You Hear What I Hear from The Little Drummer Boy: Book II

Fah Who Foraze, Dah Who Doraze, Welcome Christmas from How the Grinch Stole Christmas

The First Noel by Bing Crosby

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen by Various

Hark the Herald Angels Sing by Celtic Woman

Here Comes Santa Claus from The Year Without a Santa Claus

Holly Jolly Christmas by Burl Ives

I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas by Bing Crosby and Martha Mears

I Saw Three Ships (Come Sailing In) by Various

It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas by Bing Crosby

It’s The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by Andy Williams

Joy to the World by Celtic Woman

Just What I Always Wanted from Jack Frost

Oh Come All Ye Faithful by Celtic Woman

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer by Burl Ives

Santa Clause is Comin’ to Town by Fred Astaire

The 12 Days of Christmas by Various

When Christmas Comes to Town from The Polar Express

You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch by Thurl Ravenscroft

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300px-Nativity_tree2011christmas

And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.  And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.”

Merry Christmas!