October 26, 2022 by L.

On Me Next Thousandth Birthday, I’ll Stalk Your Fairest Offspring and Claim Her As Me Bride!: Leprechaun 2 (1994)

A curse be placed upon your seed, William O’Day. You may have saved your daughter, but on me next thousandth birthday, I’ll stalk your fairest offspring and claim her as me bride! Ha ha ha ha ha! Happy St. Patrick’s Day.

Back in 2017 October had a Friday the 13th and I was excited as I planned to review the second installment of the Friday the 13th franchise, Friday the 13th Part II

Then I had the idea, why not make every Friday a slasher film? I could review Psycho II, Halloween II, and Nightmare on Elm Street II. Unfortunately, a lot of things happened that year, the biggest issue being that my charge stopped working and the new one didn’t come in until much too late. I never finished that Horrorfest and I didn’t complete the four slasher film reviews I had been planning.

I then decided that I would just try to review the other two films in the years leading up to another Friday the 13th in October. After all it was happening again in 2023, that was plenty of time to review the films. Right?

Yep it’s 2022 and I have failed to review the other films. I’m planning on still reviewing Halloween II, but I don’t have time to watch a movie I haven’t seen before, Nightmare on Elm Street II, as I have so little time these days. So I decided I would have to replace that slasher franchise with another one, but which one?

I started going through a slasher film list alphabetically and looking for a movie franchise where I had already reviewed the first film, seen the second and could review it, and had a third film for next year. When I hit the “L”s I saw the Leprechaun film franchise and even thought I dislike both films, it fit my requirements. That’s why it’s here and will be back again next year.

Leprechaun is a terrible film and the sequel is just as bad. In fact the only reason I have seen it is my friend and I watched it a few years ago to make fun of it. We had a “green food” themed Saint Patrick’s Day of which I made Irish Soda Bread (none green) and Brown Butter Matcha Brownies.

But enough of that, let’s get on to reviewing this travesty.

This is the only film in the Leprechaun franchise to take place on St. Patrick’s Day. Odd isn’t that? Originally the film was pitched with the Leprechaun searching for his bride, and tricking Tory (Jennifer Aniston) into marrying him. They reached out to Aniston, but she declined. Good choice.

The film starts off in 994 on the Leprechaun’s 1000th birthday. He tells his slave that he has found the perfect bride and will free him once he is married. The slave, William O’Day, is happy at first, but then horrified to see that the bride is his daughter. The Leprechaun tells O’Day that if his daughter sneezes three times without someone saying “bless you” she will forevermore be his.

Yes someone was paid big bucks for that plot point.

Of course she sneezes, dad says bless you, she’s free and the leprechaun has to wait another 1000 years to try and marry again. Why? I don’t know.

The Leprechaun is angry that O’Day foiled his plans (although it’s his own fault since he told him, rookie mistake); curses O’Day and kills him.

We then fast forward 1000 years to L. A., 1994, and of course it is also Saint Patrick’s Day. The Leprechaun will be able to come back even though they killed it in the previous film. I hate when they do that, at least Halloween Michael Myers was also supposed to be the embodiment of evil and therefore unkilliable.

Anyways, our main characters in this is the unlikable and I don’t really care about Cody who works with his uncle on giving “dark death” tours of L.A. in a hearse. He was supposed to go out with his girlfriend, Bridget O’Day, (yep you guessed it, a descendant) but cancels when his uncle is too drunk to drive. She’s angry ant him always dropping their dates and decides to hang at the go-kart place with a guy who has a crush on her, Ian.

Meanwhile, the Leprechaun has woken up and come out of a tree that was at the home of Harry Houdini. He starts his reign of terror by stealing a man’s gold tooth.

Back with Bridget she’s been flirting all night with Ian who takes her home. He turns out to not be a nice guy as he tries to force himself on her, Bridget punching him to get away. After she goes inside, he sees her in the garage beckoning him over. Of course it’s not really her, obvious to any woman, but Ian’s not thinking with his brain, and it turns out the Leprechaun has disguised a mower and kills Ian with it.

Bridget doesn’t hear any of this, odd as his screams were super load and a mower is also not quiet; when Cody comes by to apologize with flowers. Bridget is happy but starts sneezing (as the Leprechaun is trying to claim her), but when Cody tries to say God Bless You, he starts to be strangled by a phone cord. They fight and the Leprechaun takes off with Bridget, but accidentally drops a gold coin.

The Leprechaun is furious as he’s greedy and can’t spare to loose a single piece of his treasure. He sets off to get it back. Meanwhile the police suspect Cody of Ian’s murder and Bridget disappearance. He runs away and begs his uncle for advice. Morty just happens to have an overdue library book on leprechauns.

They read about the Bride search and that cast iron is the Leprechaun’s weakness. The Leprechaun attacks Cody, he’s managed to be okay and he makes a deal with the Leprechaun to trade the coin for the girl. Morty intervenes and challenges the Leprechaun to a drinking contest, and wins. Meanwhile, Cody sneaks to the go-kart racing place and steals the cast iron safe. They manage to trick the Leprechaun into the case and win. It’s over!

Just kidding. Morty double crosses them and locks Cody in the closet. He demands the Leprechaun give him his pot of gold, which the Leprechaun does…only he makes it appear in Morty’s stomach.

The Leprechaun tricks Morty into letting him free and takes the gold out like he promised, killing the Morty in the process. The Leprechaun and Cody fight, the Leprechaun trying to run Cody over with a go-kart.

But Cody can’t die as long as he has the coin. Cody heads out to save his girl. When he gets to the lair he fight the skeletal slave O’Day. They then have to escape the labyrinth, but are separated. When Cody finds Bridget, she asks him for the coin, which he gives her. Rookie mistake as it turns out to be the Leprechaun.

But that’s okay, if turns out to be a chocolate coin. Cody kills the Leprechaun, and they all live happily ever after…that is until the third film.

Or is it? It isn’t, there are more films to come.

For more Leprechaun, go to What the H*** Are You? I’m a Leprechaun, Me Dear: Leprechaun (1993)

October 6, 2017 by L.

I Don’t Kill People Anymore: Psycho II (1983)

I don’t kill people anymore.

So you all know how I feel about sequels.

I can’t stand them, there are few and far between that I can actually watch, let alone love.

But I decided to review the sequel to Friday the 13th on Friday the 13th. And to take that one step further, I’ll be reviewing a sequel to horror films that spanned sequels and influenced the horror genre. First one:

You all know that I love Alfred Hitchcock:

Master

And how much I love Psycho.

So I thought I would give this a watch when it came up on AMC‘s Fear Friday. This film takes place 22 years after the original, Norman having been receiving help that whole time has finished the program and will be released to society and the Bates Motel.

Norman thinks he is ready to live his life again, but there are many others who are not. One of which is Marion’s sister Lila Loomis (she and Sam ended up getting married).

Lila Loomis: What about his victims? I have a petition here signed by 743 people against Norman Bates’ release, including the relatives of the seven people he murdered.

Norman sets about living a normal life as much as he can, hopeful that life will be better.

Dr. Raymond: You don’t have to stay. I could find you a place in town.

Norman Bates: No, no. I… I want to stay here.

Dr. Raymond: As long as you realize the memories are more likely to reoccur here. But you know how to handle that now, don’t you?

Norman Bates: Sure.

He discovers the person placed in charge of the motel while Norman was sent away was using the motel as an hourly one and to deal drugs. Norman kicks him out, takes a job at the local diner run by Mrs. Spool, and things seem to be going well. He even befriends a young waitress, Mary Samuels.

Things start going downhill fast when Norman is given mysterious notes and phone calls from Mrs. Bates.

Then a womanly figure in black is seen running around the complex and bodies are piling up.

Norman is trying to keep it together, but is feeling the pressure and unraveling with every attack. Objects in blood are found in the house, he starts forgetting what he was doing and where he was, items of his mother’s he thought were given/thrown away all end up back in the house.

Mary feels bad for him as he is trying so hard, she ends up moving in with him to help him keep it together. And when the sheriff comes to question him about an incident, she outright lies to protect him.

Sheriff John Hunt: Are you sure neither one of you heard anything between four to five this afternoon?

Norman Bates: No, I was…

Mary: [cutting Norman off] He was with me all afternoon. We were walking in the fields behind the house around that time.

Sheriff John Hunt: Okay. Nice to see you again, Norman. [the sheriff and his deputy walk out. Mary closes the front door and watches them walk away]

Norman Bates: [to Mary; bewildered] Why did you do THAT?

Mary: Do what?

Norman Bates: Lie to the sheriff. You weren’t with me all afternoon!

Mary: I had to do something! He was going to arrest you! [Norman suddenly holds his head in pain, and slumps down into a nearby armchair] Norman, what’s wrong?

Norman Bates: It’s starting again.

Is someone trying to make Norman go crazy? Has Mrs. Bates risen from the grave? Or is Norman starting to kill again?

I have mixed feelings about this movie.

Hmm…

Let’s start with the negative:

So this movie was made in the ’80s and they decided that the classy way the original film was made wasn’t going to fly with modern viewers. So there is a lot of blood, gore, sex, etc.

Now what was positive:

I like this

I loved that they had the original actors reprise their roles. Anthony Perkins is just sheer perfection at playing a sweet innocent man you just feel sympathy and empathy for-and at the same time flip and be frightening.