To Boldly Go Where No Man Has Gone Before

So I know I haven’t gotten to Star Trek in my fangirl posts, do you might not realize this about me:

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And as this year marks the 50th anniversary of the Original SeriesI decided that how last year was on Back to the Future, this year will be on Star Trek. And next year can be Star Wars as it marks the 40th anniversary of that film. But enough on that, let’s get to our year in review!

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This is a time to reflect on what the past year held for us, the big posts, what’s new, and what you all seemed to like the most.

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This post will only cover a few things, you really should check out the year for yourself. To start at the beginning go here.

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The Views

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This year I had 68,000 views!

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Last year I had 31,000 and I thought that was a lot. Thank you buzzfeed, pinterest, facebook, twitter, and readers who practically doubled my views.

The most viewed day of the year was June 19th, in which I posted Drug of Choice.

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The Number One Post

Strangely, my top posts had nothing to do with anything posted in 2015.

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But you all like what you like!

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So the number one post was from my Romance is in the Air Valentine’s countdown from 2013. That post was Fulfilling the List: A Walk to Rememberand I think I need to post on it once again.

Second place went to A Monster Race: Scooby-Doo and the Reluctant Werewolf (1988), from 2012, and my first Horrorfest, theHalloween countdown. In third place was I Saw Goody Osburn With the Devil: The Crucible (1996)from 2013 and my Horrorfest II Halloween countdown. In fourth we had In Rhapsody Over Clint Eastwooda post from 2013. And rounding them out in my fifth place, we had a post from 2014, Men What Happened?

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The Followers!

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So this community has really grown in numbers and I can not describe how pleased I am about that. We have gone from 14 followers in 2012 to 42 followers in 2013, 169 followers in 2014, and are now at 439. That’s amazing!

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So enough about the statistics and numbers! Let’s move on to what was covered this year and what changes I have made to the blog

1)Back to the Future

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So with it being 2015 and the year Back to the Future turned 30, we had a lot of Back to the Future love going on. It started with my first post of the year, Where We’re Going, We Don’t Need RoadsOn the amazingness of this film as it celebrates its 30 year anniversary, in Back in Time: Happy 30th Anniversary Back to the Future. My joy at watching all three films on the big screen, in The Future is NOW!: Happy Back to the Future Day!. On the importance of November 12th in The Back to the Future series, in The Temporal Junction Point for the Entire Space-Time ContinuumAn episode of Supernatural that mimics Back to the Future, in Back to the Supernatural. And a list of everything Back to the Future got right about 2015, in We’re in the Future: Good-bye 2015.

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2) Fandom Love

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This year I continued my fandom posts, posting on Sundays. This year I wasn’t as faithful, as sometimes life would throw me a curveball, but I am getting closer to completing it. I just have to stop adding things.

So far this year I have covered: Amazing Phil/Phil Lester, Audrey Hepburn, The Baby-Sitters Club, The Beach Party Series, The Brady Bunch, Brotherly Love,  The Brothers Grimm Fairy Tales, Captain PlanetThe Cat Who Mystery Series, Cinemasins, Clint Eastwood, Daredevil, Death on Demand Mystery Series, Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, Dr. Seuss, Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, 8 Simple Rules, Elvis Presley, Eureka, Everyday Sunday, The Fast & the Furious franchise, Foreigner, Full House, Gargoyles, Grimm, Growing Pains, Guardians of the Galaxy, Hans Christian Anderson, Harry Potter, Hawk Nelson, Hell on Wheels, Hercules: The Legendary Journeys, The Highlander, How I Met Your Mother, How It Should Have Ended, The Hunger Games, Indiana Jones, James Bond, Jimmy Stewart, Journey, The Kinsey Millhone Mysteries, Las Vegas, Leverage, The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, Lord of the Rings, Madeleine L’Engle, Make It or Break It, The Mentalist, Michael Crichton, Michael J. Fox, Midsomer Murders, Murder She Wrote, My Chemical Romance, Nancy Drew, The Nanny, NCIS, North & South, The Nostalgia Critic, The Office, Once Upon a Time, The Phantom of the Opera, Pokemon, The Princess Bride, Psych, Ray Bradbury, The Riyria Revelations, and Sabrina the Teenage Witch.

To read more, click on these links: Fandom Love, It’s Fantastico!, A Fantabulous Post, A FANtastic Voyage, Please Excuse My Dear Fan Lady, I’m So FANcy!, Back to the Fandoms, Old Fandoms and New Fancies, Fantom of the Opera, Fun & Full of FANcy, The Fans and the Furious, It’s a Fan World After Alland Portrait of a Fangirl.

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3) Buzzfeed Bust or Library Love

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So I was trying to get a job with Buzzfeed and posted a few things as it was part of the application process. However no one was really interested in my lists so I decided to bring that style here. I only did one, Heaven on Earth, in which I listed the best fictional libraries; but I’m thinking of doing a few more in the future.

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4) Story of My Life

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So this year we once again had stories of my everyday life. First I shared about my horrible ex co-worker, Wanda in Five to Nine. Then there was the time my friend’s car started to overheat in San Francisco and we started to stall on the bridge, in I Left My Car in San FranciscoMeeting Dr. Sexy from Supernatural in real life, in Paging Dr. Sexy.  My spot issues that rivals Dr. Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang, in A Spot of TroubleOn how an ear infection wasn’t going to stop me from seeing the midnight showing, in Avengers Assemble. On living in a world that tries to get you to alter your appearance, in Small and ProudIt being so incredibly hot that I try to escape to England, in England Dreamin’ On Such a Summer’s DayIn which I do not learn my lesson and injure my legs again, in Walking on Pins and Needles. The fact that I will probably live out my life alone, in Crazy Book Lady. When I got caught in a crazy storm, in It’s Raining, It’s Pouring. The suffering of wisdom teeth, in Turn Your Wounds into Wisdom, and Your Wisdom Teeth into Wounds. How a baggy sweatshirt saved my life, in A Real Life Saver. Getting caught in a monsoon type rainstorm, in Every Month at the Quarter Moon There’ll Be a MonsoonChopping down the Christmas tree in Winter Wonderland.

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5) A Sense of Sense and Sensibility 

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So last year I talked about reviewing Sense & Sensibility, along with all those based on the works or rewritings. I talked about the girls’ older brother John, and how he severely let these girls down in Promises Were Made to Be Broken. The joys and horrors of sisterhood and how the two act as a unit in Sisterly RolesEdward Ferrars’ arrival into the house and being the one that brings peace to the house in The Eye of the Storm. On Elinor’s views of Edward, in To Edward or Not to EdwardHow young girl’s views of the perfect man haven’t changed in 200 years, in Some Things Never Change.

I also reviewed The Sense and Sensibility Screenplay and Diaries, a book on the behind the scenes look of the path of getting Sense & Sensibilty from book to screen.

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6) Holiday Hijinks

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So this year we celebrated a lot of holidays, real (recognized by the government) and fictional.

We started with celebrating Martin Luther King Jr.’s Birthday and the values he stood for in Color Blind. I also brought back the Chinese New Year post, this time on my favorite sheep/sheepy moments in film and literature, in Well I Feel Sheepish: Chinese New Year. Then we had my Saint Patrick’s Day post, 17 more Irish heroes from literature, film, and TV; in Lookin’ Over a Four Leaf Clover: 17 More Irish Heroes.  Couldn’t go through a year without celebrating the awesomeness of Star Wars with May the Fourth Be With You, in We Want YouI also did a post for Memorial Day, in Do the Right Thing.  Father’s Day, with love from The Terminator in Dear Dad. The 4th of July in Every Heart Beats True for the Red, White, & BlueTalk Like a Pirate Day and free donuts, in A Pirate’s Life is the Life for Me. Going bats over Batman Day, in Na Na Na Na Batman!. Friday the 13th in The Horror!!!! And of course Thanksgiving, in You’ve Got to Accentuate the Positive

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7) The Year of the Anniversaries

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This year I honored a lot of anniversaries, it started with wanting to do something for Back to the Future and quickly grew to many more things.

I started with the 82nd anniversary of women’s right to vote, in Right to VoteWe also had The Breakfast Club turn 30 years, my post being Don’t You Forget About Me. The birthday of one of my favorite men, Clint Eastwood, in Classic Clint. The 40th anniversary of Jaws in You’re Gonna Need a Bigger ScreenOn the amazingness of Back to the Future as it celebrates its 30 year anniversary, in Back in Time: Happy 30th Anniversary Back to the FutureMy three year anniversary of being a blogger, in Year of the Anniversaries. The 10th anniversary of The Iron Giant, in A Giant Metal Man: The Iron Giant (1995)And the 200th anniversary of Emma.

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8) Romance is in the Air: Part III

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So once I again I celebrated Valentine’s Day with a countdown of 14 romantic moments from films I like. The films I reviewed this year were How to Marry a Millionaire (1953), Sabrina (1954), Gigi (1958)Making the Grade (1984)The Breakfast Club (1985), A Room With a View (1985)While You Were Sleeping (1995), Hercules (1997), The Italian Job (2003), Why Did I Get Married (2007), Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day (2008)What Happens in Vegas (2008), Up (2009), and New Year’s Eve (2011)

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9) Commentary on Cinderella Cynics

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With Disney’s new Cinderella live action film, I felt the need to call out to the cynics and naysayers, and prove that their smack was unfounded and Cinderella is actually a pretty awesome story.

To read go to If the Shoe Fits: Why Cinderella is Actually Awesome.

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10) The Enigmatic and Enjoyable Emma

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Like I did with Sense & Sensibility (see #4), I decided that I would begin going through Emma, along with reviewing any adaptations or retellings of this story.

So I started off talking about the uniqueness of Emma Woodhouse among the other Jane Austen heroines, in One of a Kind. How loneliness severely affects the character of Emma and explains her actions, in All By Myself. How easy it is for people and Emma to take credit for something they actually have no control over, in Credit Where Credit is Due. On how Mr. Weston is a great man but no one ever talks about him, in Unsung Austen Men: Mr. Weston.

I also reviewed the book Mr. Knightley’s Diary by Amanda Grange, a book that looks at the story of Emma from his point of view.

And of course, a post in honor of its 200th Anniversary, We Wish You a Merry Christmas.

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11) The Painted Path of Christ

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I brought back the painted portrayals of Christ, adding one more picture to my Easter countdown. This year I choose the following images: Jesus Enters Jerusalem by Giotto, The Last Supper by Dieric Bouts the Elder, The Taking of Christ by Carvaggio, The Lamentation of Christ or Foreshortened Christ by Mantegna Andrea .

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12) Retelling Pride & Prejudice

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I didn’t do any posts on Pride & Prejudice the book as I was going through Sense & Sensibility and Emma.  However I did review quite a few novels that are based on or retellings of Austen’s work.

There was Fall for You by Cecilia Gray, in which all your favorite Austen heroines attend The Jane Austen Academy boarding school in California together. This year the school was bought and has some major changes, allowing boys to attend! How would these girls get along in a modern world, follow this link to find out.

The Accidental Bride: A Romantic Comedy by Janice Harayda; is the story of a Jane Austen devotee set to be married soon, when she suddenly has second thoughts. With everyone pushing her in different directions, she relies on her love of Jane Austen to help her through. To read the review, follow this link.

Mr. Darcy Broke My Heart, by Beth Pattillo, is the tale of a non-Austenite; filling in for her sister and taking a class along with presenting a paper on Austen. She also gets caught up in spylike drama when she becomes the owner of secret Austen papers. To see what I thought of it, follow this link. 

Pride & Prescience (Or A Truth Universally Acknowledged) by Carrie Bebris, is a mystery with supernatural elements. Caroline Bingley bags a wealthy American and marries him right away. But after the marriage she starts acting strangely. It is just nerves or something more nefarious at play? It’s up to Elizabeth to find out. Follow this link to read more.

Darcy’s Story: Pride and Prejudice Told From a Whole New Perspective by Janet Aylmer; in this Aylmer rewrites Pride and Prejudice but told from Mr. Darcy’s point of view instead of Elizabeth’s.

In The Confession of Fitzwilliam Darcy: A Novel by Mary Street, another author tries her hand at rewriting Pride and Prejudice from Mr. Darcy’s point of view

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13) The Commendable Cecilia Gray

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I reviewed the book Fall for You by Cecilia Grayand while I didn’t completely roast the book, I wasn’t the kindest. But Cecilia Gray took it in stride and retweeted my review, urging others to check it out. I’ve given a shout out before, and just want time to thank her again.

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14) 30 Years Has a Nice Ring to It

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My post She’s Still Preoccupied With 1985 is an ’80s lover’s dream. In it I detail every amazing ’80 thing that I love that turned 30 in 2015.

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15) 30 Day Challenge: All About Me

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I brought back the 30 Day Challenge, but instead of Disney I did 30 days all about me. These were the different topics: 1) Put Your Music Player on Shuffle and Write the First 10 Songs that Play, 2) Your Most Treasured Item, 3) Bullet Your Whole Day, 4)A Quote You Try to Live By, 5) If You Could Go Anywhere, Where Would It Be?, 6) Your Views on Mainstream Music, 7) What You Ate Today8) One Thing You’re Excited For9) Something That Has Inspired You, 10) What You Wore Today, 11)Something You Want to Do Before You Die, 12) Your Celebrity Look-A-Like, 13)Something That You’re Proud Of, 14) Your Favorite Holiday, 15) Five Random Facts, 16)Five Weird Things You Like, 17) Five Pet Peeves , 18) Somewhere You Would Like to Move to or Visit, 19) Something That You Miss, 20) What You Night Was Like, 21) Last Film You Saw in Theaters, 22) Something You Never Expected, 23) Your Dream House, 24) A Book You Love, 25) Your Family, 26)Five Guys Who You Find Attractive, 27) Five Ways to Win Your Heart28)Something You Regret29)Things You Want to Say to an Ex, 30) Your Opinion About Your Body and How Comfortable You Are With It

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16) My Family is Growing

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My family is getting bigger! 2015 saw the inauguration of my sister blog Mysterious Eatswhich reviews mysteries and recipes.

From Print to Screen was also born in 2015, and it compares the printed book to the screen version, declaring which was better.

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17) Horrorfest IV: The Curse

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This year’s Horrorfest covered movies, TV shows, music, and more.

For films, we had: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931), A Study in Scarlet (1933)The 39 Steps (1935)Jamaica Inn (1939), Mystery of the 13th Guest (1943), Gaslight (1944)Dangerous Crossing (1953), Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956), Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958), The Screaming Skull (1958), The Bat (1959), Psycho (1960)Rosemary’s Baby (1968), The Stepford Wives (1975), Total Recall (1990)Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992), The Iron Giant (1995)Thinner (1996), Under Wraps (1997)Alien Vs. Predator (2004)The Brothers Grimm (2005), The Visitation (2006), The Girl He Met Online (2014)Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015).

Every Friday I reviewed a TV show. This year the ones I choose were: the episode Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up from The Twilight ZoneA Haunting We Will Go from The Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew Mysteries; On Leather Wings from Batman: The Animated SeriesTed  from Buffy the Vampire Slayer; & The Magician’s Nephew from Midsomer Murders.

I did a post on some cool Monster Movie action figures I found, in Monster MashAnd I listed five of my favorite song to listen to on Halloween, in Haunted Harmonies of Halloween

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18) 25 Carols of Christmas

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This year for Christmas, I did a Carol countdown. Everyday I posted on one of my favorite Christmas carols.

The carols I picked were: All I Want for Christmas is YouAngels We Have Heard on HighChristmas Don’t Be LateThe Christmas Song (Merry Christmas to You)A Cowboy’s ChristmasDo You Hear What I HearFah Who Foraze, Dah Who Doraze, Welcome ChristmasThe First NoelGod Rest Ye Merry GentlemenHark the Herald Angels SingHere Comes Santa ClausHolly Jolly ChristmasI’m Dreaming of a White ChristmasI Saw Three Ships (Come Sailing In)It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like ChristmasIt’s The Most Wonderful Time of the YearJoy to the WorldJust What I Always WantedOh Come All Ye FaithfulRudolph the Red-Nosed ReindeerSanta Clause is Comin’ to TownThe 12 Days of Christmas, We Wish You a Merry Christmas When Christmas Comes to Town, and You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch

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19) When Disney Meets Austen

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I wrote a post comparing all the Austen characters to Disney ones. It took months to complete but I think it was pretty awesome. You’ll have to tell me what you think. Check it out in Waiter, There’s Some Disney in My Jane Austen.

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So what will this year hold? I don’t know. I guess you will have to join my expedition to find out.

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Happy New Year

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For 2014 in review, go to Where We’re Going, We Don’t Need Roads

For 2013 in review, go to Looking at the Past, Focusing on the Future

For 2012 in review, go to Looking Back, Moving Forward

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For more on Star Trek, go to Rock You Like a Hurricane

The Confession of Fitzwilliam Darcy

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The Confession of Fitzwilliam Darcy: A Novel by Mary Street

I know it is hard to rewrite a classic tale. You have the spirit of the original writer looming over every word.

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You also have the fans who are just ready to hate on you:

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But that doesn’t mean you have to write the most boringest version of Pride & Prejudice I’ve read so far.

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On the cover it says:

“The Holy Grail of [Pride and Prejudice] sequels for many Darcy fans.”

I don’t think so.

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Darcy is just so closed off and robotic, no warmth, sadness, surprise; any emotion at all!!!

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Every word just makes me want to go to sleep. I need MY CHARACTER TO HAVE REACTIONS! EMOTIONS! FEELINGS! SOMETHING!!! ANYTHING!!!!

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Just not worth your time at all. Try reading An Assembly Such as This or Darcy’s Story.

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For more books from a Jane Austen Hero’s perspective, go to Darcy’s Story: Pride and Prejudice Told From a Whole New Perspective

For more Pride & Prejudice, go to Be It Ever So Humble

For more works based on Jane Austen, go to Pride & Prescience (Or a Truth Universally Acknowledged)

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So today’s Christmas Carol is one I am sure you have never heard of. In fact I can’t recall where I first was introduced to it, but I love this carol.

Today’s is I Saw Three Ships (Come Sailing In). This song was printed sometime in the 17th century, the most known version being printed in 1833. Many question the three ships, as how would three ships come to Jesus in Bethlehem.

I think it was a way to blend modern times with the biblical three wise men.

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For more Christmas Carols, go to Joy to the World

Darcy’s Story: Pride and Prejudice Told From a Whole New Perspective

Darcy's Story: Pride and Prejudice Told From a Whole New Perspective

Darcy’s Story: Pride and Prejudice Told From a Whole New Perspective by Janet Aylmer

So the cover says a “whole new perspective”, but it’s not that new. Other authors were doing it before her, like Pamela Aidan in An Assembly Such as This.

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But as I have promised to review all Jane Austen inspired novels, I will review this.

So Mr. Darcy.

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We all love him. But, in the original novel, he’s actually not a major player, in the sense of being in a majority of the book. We see him in the beginning, some in the middle, and then at the end. As a whole, the book is more about Elizabeth.

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So we know how Elizabeth feels about everything, as we are in her head. But what about Mr. Darcy? What made him change from:

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To:

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So anytime you rewrite Austen it can be difficult. How do you retell the story so that it stays true to Austen, but at the same time giving it your own flavor so it isn’t a boring rehash.

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Let’s see how Aylmer does.

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So of course the book is Pride and Prejudice, and we all know the story, (or at least I imagine most of us do), so I’m only going to hit on the parts that I liked or didn’t like. Ready?

So one thing Aylmer does differently with her work, is that instead of starting with Darcy heading to Netherfield or starting at the ball, it begins with Georgiana Darcy almost running away with Mr. Wickham.

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I thought this was a good opening as it set it apart from other retellings, and showed the great relationship Mr. Darcy has with his sister.

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So what’s nice about this version, is that Aylmer goes farther than Aidan went. She gets into Darcy’s head and actually tries to create a fuller character. It isn’t as big a release as I would like, but I understand that it must be hard writing when you have the ghost of Jane Austen lurking over you.

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So one thing we see in Darcy, is that he is not a true romantic, willing to marry whoever he loves. He needs someone in his position of wealth and class, but he won’t settle for just anyone. He wants a relationship like his father and mother, who earnestly cared for one another. And as his cousin Fitzwilliam points out, it might be time to start looking, after all he’s not getting any younger.

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For Darcy he has yet to find a woman that captures him wholeheartedly. There are young ladies of means, beauty, etc. but he cannot connect to their intelligence or wit. So until then, he’s content with being single and enjoying his hobbies and managing the estates.

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In this version Darcy hates balls, not just because he hates to dance, of which Aylmer states it in such perfection I am now forever going to say this when people try to get me to dance:

“I cannot recall how many times I have tried to impress upon you that my knowledge of the exercise is not matched by any enthusiasm…”

But him being single and wealthy, he has to spend all his time with overzealous mothers trying to push their daughters on him. It can be extremely annoying.

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I like that addition. When I read Pride & Prejudice for the first time, I always imagined that someone as single, rich, and attractive as Mr. Darcy probably had women constantly trying to get him for his money and title. Like in Cinderella when the prince wants a girl who wants him for himself, not because he’s a prince.

So Darcy is going to visit his Aunt as usual, but he can’t get Elizabeth out of his mind.

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So when he hears that she will be visiting the Collins, he writes to Col. Fitzwilliam and moves their trip up to coincide.

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There he makes conversation as best he can, as we all know he is really shy under that exterior.

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He starts to believe that her comments, manners, everything she does means that she likes him too. For someone who has always had to make it clear to women that he is not interested, the thought never comes to mind that she might not like him. He assumes she understood how much he cared about her in their shallow, little, talks they had.

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It is easy to throw stones, but on some level this must have been what he was thinking. I mean at this point in Pride & Prejudice, Elizabeth has heard the lies of Wickham and that Darcy was the one who took Bingley away from Jane, so we know that Elizabeth hates his guts.

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But Darcy must have seen something that he thought was encouraging, or else he never would have proposed.

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And then when he hears all that Elizabeth thinks of him he decides he must correct it. Now this is what I always thought of Darcy as well. I always thought that he never realized what image he was giving off to others, his reserved nature coming off as snobbery and jerkiness. Bingley is so nice and thinks Darcy is awesome, while any other people around him are always brown-nosing, trying to win his favor. He’s never had anyone be brutally honest with him.

So he decides to write a letter, partly because he is angry, but mostly to fix his character in her eyes. He then starts to really think about what portrayal he is giving off.

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I agree with Aylmer in this, as I always believed that this shock of seeing how others viewed him was part of the reason why his reserve breaks down.

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But while all is settled in that sense, he still can’t stop thinking about what she said.

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We also have some great scenes with Darcy and Georgiana, which deeply cement how great an older brother he is.

And of course we get to see Darcy track down Wickham. While it doesn’t go like this:

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Darcy still comes out on top.

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For more books from a Jane Austen Hero’s perspective, go to Mr. Knightley’s Diary

For more Pride & Prejudice, go to Be It Ever So Humble

For more works based on Jane Austen, go to Pride & Prescience (Or a Truth Universally Acknowledged)

 

The Story, We’re Living it. It’s Alive: The Brothers Grimm (2005)

Brothers_grimm_movie_poster

The story, it’s happening to us now. We’re living it. It’s-it’s alive, it’s real, it’s breathing.

So remember way back in April, when I talked about how much I love the Brothers Grimm and all their stories?

brothers grimm fairy tales

Well for those of you who don’t, I loved them. I used to read the stories over and over and over again.

readingabkkid impression identity a part of us You've got mail meg ryan

They are such a huge, huge part of my childhood. I not only read them, but I read like every version of their tales. Such as Shannon Hale’s The Goose Girl; The Princess Test by Gail Carson Levine; or The Rumplestilskin Problem by Vivian Vande Velde. And that’s just naming a few, I’ve read practically every version and retelling out there.

LifeasaFangirl

So when I saw a trailer for The Brothers Grimm I was so EXCITED! I’m not quite sure what I was expecting, I don’t even remember what the trailer was like. I just know if it had the Brothers Grimm’s name on it. I WAS THERE!!!!!!!!

excited

My mom, sister, and went to see it and I thought…..

Whattheheck

 

WHAT THE HECK IS THIS THING? THE BROTHERS GRIMM WHAT? THIS THING IS SO CREEPY I AM SCARRED FOR LIFE!!! SCARRED!!!

Needless to say I didn’t like it.

I don't like it 11

I didn’t understands half the things that were happening! I didn’t like most of the characters. And I thought it was one of the creepiest things I had ever seen. And I was like thirteen at the the time and saw many different films, but this one creeped me out. After a while, I kind of forgot about it, other than I liked Heath Ledger (he’s always awesome) and that I actually liked Matt Damon in this.

What the

I know, I know. If you have been following you should be shocked at that statement as I have said quite a few times how much I dislike Matt Damon. I just think he is a horrible actor as he is the same in everything!! However, he was so different in this film that I actually forgot it was him. And that is what a good actor does, they melt away so all you see is their character on the screen.

So there! tongue sticking out pug

Anyways, so time past and I completely forgot about this movie. That is until I saw it on Amazon Prime Instant Watch.

It's Paul!

Amazon’s all watch this!

And I thought, hey, ten years have past. Maybe it’s time to give it another view.

The plot thickens

Why not?

And as I remember it being a horrorish/comedy film (what I call Com-Ror), I can totally review it for horrorfest. So here we go. I present to you:

Brothers_grimm_movie_poster

So this film is actually a melting pot. It is a historical fiction, horror, comedy, and fantasy concoction.

IndianaJonesHmmMaybe

And they actually work pretty well together.

So the film opens up with the poor Grimm family. The young sister is sick and they are all shivering from the cold as they have no more wood for a fire. Wilhelm, the oldest, is trying to be the man of the house and helping his mother while Jacob has gone out to sell the family cow. Instead of bringing back money, he has “magic beans”.

Spoke too soon

Poor, sweet, naive little Jacob. He was tricked into getting magic beans. The mom is sad, but Wilhelm becomes incensed and beats his brother.

escalatedquickly

I know we are barely into the film and already we have a dead father, soon-to-be dead sister, a boy tricked out of everything, and then one brother getting beat by the other. That’s a really dark opening scene for a family picture.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

And by now you can kind of see the direction this film is taking. It is going to be the story pieces occurred in real life and lead to the collection of tales we have today. I have to say I was actually down with that. It could be pretty cool. The sort of prequel to Once Upon a Time or something.

indiana_jonesoh_yesyeah

We then have the title and a killer opening scene. SUPER DRAMATIC! And I loved it! Dark night, rain, two strangers on horses with a note demanding entrance!

shiver

It was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!

Anyways, it turns out that Wilhelm (Matt Damon), or Will as he is more often called, and Jacob (Heath Ledger), or Jake are ghost hunters/witch killers/ monster destroyers. Basically the 19th century version of Dean and Sam Winchester.

Supernatural

Say What

When I first saw this I was like what are you doing? I’m pretty sure that there were nothing like that. After watching I had to read up on them.

It turns out in real life that Jacob was actually the older brother. Their father did die when they were young and they had to take care of the family, eventually going to school for law. But later during the Romantic period, they began collecting folk tales, creating the classic literature we have today.

keanu Whoa

How did they go from that to:

FBIMonster-Movie-supernatural-2654708-1280-720

Yeah…

SayWhat?BuffyVampireSlayernosense

This was one of the reasons I wasn’t really into this “modern”, twisted type of film, in fact a lot weren’t. This film was actually ahead of its time as if it had come out a few years ago (instead of 10) it would have fit right in with Red Riding Hood (2011), Snow White and the Hunstman (2012), The Raven (2012), Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012), and Hansel & Gretal: Witchhunters (2013)I mean look at that poster! Isn’t this something you would see today?

Brothers_grimm_movie_poster

Eliminating Evil Since 1812 this is something you would definitely see today.

Anyways, back to the review. So the brothers are in Karlstadt to get rid of a witch menacing a mill. This is actually a pretty awesome scene as they fight the witch. I wish I could find a video. Oh well. This is kind of what it looked like:

black cauldron

So this witch comes at them and attacks. They try and destroy her, but she starts to control them and they start to fight with each other.

Spoke too soon

They fight, but Will manages to overcome it and kill the ghost. They get paid and all is well until we discover that the whole thing is fake. They hire two guys to play the monsters of the folk tales around the area, and then the Grimms come in and save the day by ridding the area of them.

Oh jeez.

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

You are taking folk historians and making them not only hunters but conmen.

IDon'tevenknowhowtorespondGilmoreGirls

Besides that, movie, I see what you’re doing.

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This is going to be one of those films where they show a fake thing in the beginning that is going to be the direction the film goes to in the end. You know like in An American Werewolf in London, where he growls at himself in a mirror, only to later do the same things as a werewolf.

Gotcha!

Oh well.

I guess we will just have to wait to see how it turns out.

So while in reality Jacob and Will were the best of friends, in this Will is extremely cruel.

Jerk

When he goes to give Jacob his half of the money, his has to throw in one last dig.

Will: Your half professor, or would you like it in beans?

Ryan-Gosling-Oh-No-You-Didnt-Half-Nelson

Come on Will, he was just a little boy!!!. He was trying to help!!!! Let it go!

LetGoofthePast

So while they are celebrating and having fun, we cut to the village Marbaden. A girl in a little red cape is looking through the forest. Now the forest is amazing! It is exquisitely beautiful and terrifying. It looks just like something out of an illustration in a book or a painting. The film was worth it for those moments alone.

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Anyways, the little girl becomes fightened and tries to outrun whatever it is, but doesn’t manage to and is taken.

What! Mark Wahlberg that's weird

So as the the guys are celebrating their sucess, Jacob starts to feel down. He was a scholar and is unhappy as to what he is doing now.

All I could think was why isn’t he a scholar anymore? Did he lose his job? Was it because of the French? Time for a history lesson!

historyteach

So in 1837 the two lost their posts at the university of Göttingen as they went against King Ernest Augustus I who dissolved parliament and demanded oaths of allegiance from all employees. But this film takes place earlier than that…In the early 19th century, Napoleon was seizing control of the world and had gained Western Germany. It is logical that Jacob, being rather outspoken and prone to not always thinking before he speaks, refused to do something similar to what happened at Göttingen, and lost his position.

Jacob Grimm BrothersGrimm

Moving on…

Anyways, Will has gone on to be with some bar maids, while Jacob is scribbling in his book when a man charges in. It is the famous Italian torturer, Mercurio Cavaldi. He takes them to see French General Delatombe who is strangely played by the same actor who plays Elizabeth Swann’s dad in Pirates of the Caribbean.

brothersGrimm

They have discovered that the Grimms are conmen, having captured their other workers, and tortured them And this movie spares nothing, showing the men upside down and covered in snails.

Whattheheck

Yes, snails. I mean I hate snails and that would be torture to me, but is having snails on you really painful? Let’s look it up! And I found nothing so I’m unsure why they would do that.

Anyways, Delatombe demands to know where the 10 missing girls are. Jacob and Will have no clue what is going on.

SayWhat?BuffyVampireSlayernosense

Apparently someone has stolen 10 girls from the village of Marbaden. The French General doesn’t like that the German people are not listening and reverting back to their cultural ways. He sends the Grimms and their team to solve the mystery, or be killed. The Grimms heartily go.

Meanwhile, two siblings have decided to go looking for the missing girls, Hans and Greta (Hansel and Gretal). The forest steals Greta’s scarf away from her, using it to eventually lure her away and capture her.

WizardofOzAppleTreesDorothySmacked

Hans races home to find his father.

Back in the villlage the town has gathered and are telling the Grimm brothers everything that has happened. Who has disappered and how they have disappered.

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As they are talking, Hans rushes in and relates what has happened. The Grimms are eager to get started and ask for a guide. They recommend the “cursed one”.

shiver

They go see the “cursed one”, who turns out to be Angelika. Her father was a great woodsman, but died last year in the winter snow, although a body was never recovered. Her two sisters were the first to be taken, hence making her “cursed”.

Reality Sucks

Angelika doesn’t want to help, but the torturous Calvadi convinces her, by almost killing her with a knife. And then he starts hitting on her in the nastiest way. He’s just ew!

ew! Gross Yuck

Yeah…

Certified Creepo Ribbon

So with all parties in accord they journey into the forbidden forest.

Now I just want to stop and say that I really like that while the film is predominately English (of course) there is quite a lot of dialogue spoken in French and German. I like when movies do that. Good going guys.

Take note Hollywood

Take note Hollywood

Back to the forest. Will is totally in his role saying how he “feels” things and can “sense” things.

And Jacob is all, whatever Will.

Karen stop talking

But he loves the forest as it seems as if all those stories he’s studied over the years are finally coming alive. In fact he believes that this particular story they are in is about King Childeric I’s beautiful Queen. She was the fairest of all, and cared only about herself. When the black plague came, she built a tower high above the forest and the dying people. Unfortunately she still caught it, but tried to use black magic to overcome it and live forever. The spell worked, but instead of remaining beautiful, she aged.

It was this bad.

It has been over 500 years and Jacob believes that not only is she in the tower, but she is behind it all.

Will on the other hand thinks that is the stupidest thing he has ever heard

stupidestThingeverheard

and that someone else is trying to con the villagers.

They find the tower in the woods, of which Angelika tells them that it was destroyed, but mysteriously grew back.

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Ahhh!

Ahhh!

Some of the first creepy things we see are all these ugly black bugs coming out of stuff. It’s like The Mummy beetles or something. Then the trees keep moving all around. If that was me I’d want to get out of there asap.

Run Away

So far we have had beetles, creepy trees, and now birds. Creepy birds right out of a Hitchcock scene.

birds Brothers Grimm

Gilmore girls creep

They want to leave and are trying to go, but can’t find the way as the trees have moved around.

WizardofOzAppleTreesDorothySmacked

While everyone is distracted, a wolf transforms into a person, the woodsman.

I guess a backwards wolfman?

I guess a backwards wolfman?

And feeds one of the horses spiders. And guess which horse it is? Jacob’s.

mary_bennetCan't get a break

He leaves and the Grimm team regroups eager to leave the forest. Angelika grabs a toad and talks to it, licking its belly so it will point the way.

ew! Gross Yuck

DISGUSTING!!!!

I mean seriously, what were you thinking?

At this point I was looking at Anjelika and thought, she looks really familiar. Where have I seen her before….?

suspicious Hmm

So I looked her up and it was LENA HEADEY. Man that woman, I CAN NEVER RECOGNIZE HER. She looks different in like every movie she is in. From The Jungle Book, to The Brothers Grimm, to 300, to Dredd, to Game of Thrones; man I never would have realized her characters were played by the same person unless you lined them up next to each other. And probably not even then. You’re good Lena, real good.

indiana_jonesoh_yesyeah

So they make it back to the village. The Grimms are working as Cinderella’s in girls clothes, by orders of Calavadi.

Whattheheck

I told you he was one real sicko.

Meanwhile, a little girl hears a voice calling her. She gets up to see where it is coming from and it turns out to be one of the horses making noises. She goes over to calm it down. ALONE!

Every time!

Now this part always bothered me. We see how SUPER protective the father was of his daughter, and she knew that pretty much every girl has been captured and taken away, why would you do this alone? I would have woken up my father and been like I hear something come with me.

Now this part is truly disgusting with the horse. All these spiders come and make a web that grabs the girl, and the horse swallows her. The third most horrifying scene in this film.

There is always a but

It is so disgusting and horrible, but also very well done. The Grimm brothers and friends follow them and her and the forest is truly horrifying.

When the tree kills the man, just ouch.

Calvaldi believes that the Grimm brothers killed his men with the help of Angelika, and they all head back to see the General. Now this is the second most horrifying scene when they torture them, trying to get them to confess. They kill a kitten! A KITTEN! Why would they kill a cute orange kitten in this?

I mean seriously, what were you thinking?

I mean seriously, what were you thinking?

They convince the General they will stop it and head back to the village.

Now in this moment I realized how much I absolutely love Jacob Grimm.

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Jacob is a total fanboy!

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He loves folk and fairy tales, and has studied them for so long.

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And now he is actually in the story!! He gets to be the hero of his favorite thing to read!!! How awesome is that!!! That is like every fan’s dream. I know it was mine. There were so many places I always wanted to visit and so many tales I wanted to be the hero of. I AM JACOB.

Anyways so Jacob is really excited, but Will isn’t. In fact Will wants to take off and leave this all behind.

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And what’s wrong with that? Doesn’t everyone?

fandomvsReallife

Anyways, so Jacob tries to convince Angelika to help him out.

Will Grimm: Ignore him. He wishes his whole life was something out of a book. And now he thinks he’s in love.

Jacob Grimm: Shut up, Will!

Will Grimm: Angelika, do what your father wanted: leave the village now.

Angelika: No, Will. I’m gonna find my sisters.

Jacob Grimm: Will doesn’t care about them. Will doesn’t care about anything but himself!

Will Grimm: This isn’t a fairy tale. They are not coming back!

Jacob Grimm: This is not your world, Will! [to Angelika] Angelika, you know, don’t you? The story, it’s happening to us now. We’re living it. It’s-it’s alive, it’s real, it’s breathing. And we can give it a happy ending.

Angelika: Jake…

Jacob Grimm: Angelika, we’ll find your sisters. All right? We’ll bring them back.

Will Grimm: [getting angry] Bring back her sisters? [kicks Jacob] Bring them back? Bring them back with what? Magic beans?

Jacob Grimm: Why do you say that?

Will Grimm: Magic beans don’t work! They don’t bring people back to life! They did not then and they will not now! You go wait by the horses! Jacob, wait by the horses!

Will is such a jerk, I totally want to punch him in the face!

Pride&PrejudiceDarcypunch

Will talks to Angelika, but Jacob will not be deterred and he runs off to the forest to try and save the girls.

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But Will chases after him.

When Jacob punched Will in the face finally I was so happy. Yeah!!!!

Finally something GOOD!

Finally!

So now the brothers are back to being a team, but while they are doing that, back in the village comes the most horrifying scene ever. This is not for the weak of heart. I swear, this scene scarred me FOR LIFE! FOR LIFE!!!!

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So Sasha is going to get water from the well, when a bird falls in and…I can’t do the scene justice, you’re just going to have to watch it yourself.

OMG

That ball of goo coming to life

ew! Gross Yuck

Her face, eyes, and mouth melting away

Ahhh!

Ahhh!

Then this black blob has her face and mouth and starts following her

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then it goes inside and grabs her and eats her!

Tuesdaythe17th scream ah

And turns into a cookie and runs away!!!

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I am SCARRED FOR LIFE!!! It gave me nightmares, it made it impossible for me to eat gingerbread for a few years. And I wasn’t a little little kid when I saw this either. I was 13. This scene, it just

shiver

I have to move on now.

So the Grimms are in the forest. Will has helped get Jacob on top of the very high tower,

Don't fall.

Don’t fall.

On the roof Jacob notices the coffins they saw before are numbered 12, like a clock.

IndianaJonesHmmMaybe

Down below Will spots something strange in the water. It’s Sasha in a dress. He goes over to look at her, when the wolf comes.

wolfman

He changes into a person and we see his face, seeing that it is Angelika’s dad!!! He goes over to Sasha and places her into a coffin. On her feet form glass slippers, and he takes one drop of blood, giving it to a raven to give to the queen upstairs.

In the mirror she looks beautiful and young, but in reality she is an old skeleton.

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She starts to charm Jacob, while below Will has to deal with her woodsman.

The whole breaking the mirror destroys the power of the witch reminds me of The Picture of Dorian Gray. The only way to kill Dorian was to destroy his picture, the only way to kill this witch, break the mirror.

BrothersGrimmBrokenmirrorQueen

They run back to the village with Sasha, Will being the one to kiss the frog to find out the way. When they get there, Sasha is prounounced dead as she isn’t breathing, even though Will saw her walk to the coffin. While they are trying to figure things out who should show up but the French General and a mass of troops.

They declare that the Grimms are really behind it all, having killed their two workers who “confessed” it all.

They decide they are going to burn down the forest and the Grimm brothers. As they are tied up and ready to start the pyre, they toss in Jacob’s book, his collection of tales. All I could think was

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

NOT THE BOOOOOOOOOOOKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anjelika has been able to free herself and she goes and saves the boys from being burnt to a crisp. Jacob tries to save his book, but Will drags him off as his life is more important.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

NOT THE BOOKS!!!!

you're evil

Now the Queen doesn’t appreciate anyone trying to destroy her home and sends out some magic that not only stops the flames, but takes out a few guys as well.

When the get into the forrest they run into the wolfman/huntsman who reveals to Angelika that he is her father. He was dying in the forest when the Queen found him and saved him. He is in love with her and would do anything for her. Even sacrificing his own children.

Star Wars Dark side power Darth vader

Not only did he take his two youngest girls first, but he snags Angelika to replace Sasha and complete the circle of 12.

How rude

I know he’s under a magic spell, but his OWN DAUGHTERS!!!

Will is totally unsure of what to do, while Jacob is in his element and has become even more attractive. Not only is set out on saving Angelika, but he also takes out the murderous General.

Jacob Grimm BrothersGrimm

It must be nice for Jacob to be the hero for once, instead of Will.

I noticed something about the French, German, and Italians. Everyone who is not German is a crazy psychopath. We have the murderous, vain, evil Queen; the gloutton, tortourous, evil General; Calvadi the pervert and master of torture; and then the general’s right hand man just as crazy and creepy. I think it was on purpose, trying to show the way that the Germans thought of the invaders, how stereotyped and evil they are. It works for the film.

New plan

Jacob climbs up the tower to kill the queen, but the knife he picks up is enchanted and he ends up stuck to the wall. I know that he had no other weapon on hand, but come on! She’s an evil sorceress, anything in the room that belongs to her, chances are she can control them!!!

Will ends up following Jacob and when he gets there the Queen enchants the knives so that they have a duel to the death. (Just like I said they would)

I think that is a pretty jerk move to slip from the knife so you brother can kill you. I understand why you do it as it is the only way to free one of you and have him save the day, but it still is pretty mean.

As Jacob is trying to figure out what to do next, the Queen decides that dear old dad, is too old, and turns her attentions toward Will becoming her love slave. As she is turning Will, Jacob finally remembers the mirror and destroys it, killing the Queen.

BrothersGrimmBrokenmirrorQueen

So Jacob is the hero!

      Jacob’s Hero List

  • Save the Girls ✓
  • Defeat the Evil Queen ✓
  • Save the Day ✓

Now if only he had a plan on how to get out of a crumbling castle.

meettheRobinsonsPlannotthoughtthrough

He makes it out okay, but it looks like he celebrated prematurely. The girls are still dead, or really frozen in eternal sleep.

Spoke too soon

Spoke too soon

Jacob is lost in what to do, but Calavadi, who has now become a “Grimm-y”, tells him that in his home country there is a story of true love’s kiss waking the girl. Jacob goes to kiss Angelika, but Calvadi warns him that if the love is not true than Angelika will die!

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

Jacob goes for the kiss and…

SleepingBeautyTrueLoveKiss

The spell is broken. All the girls come out and are alive and well.

Double double yay

Jacob goes over to Will, but he’s not moving…

Spoke too soon

Spoke too soon

Jacob is heartbroken, but Calavadi reminds him that a kiss could wake him too. As Jacob goes, Will interupts him. Yep it turns out that Will the stinker is alive and fine. Angelika kisses him to “wake him up”; and then everyone returns to town. There the village throws a big party, happy to have everyone back.

Will Grimm: I’ve been thinking of an alternative career path.

Jacob Grimm: Will.

Will Grimm: One that uses all of our new expertise.

Jacob Grimm: Will.

Will Grimm: Now, I haven’t really sorted it yet…

Jacob Grimm: Will, Will, Will, listen. This is the real world. We’re-we’re men without a country, we’re enemies of the state, and worst of all we haven’t a single bean to our name.

Will Grimm: It’s a good name, though, isn’t it?

Jacob Grimm: It’s a damn good name. Let’s dance. Come on!

TheEnd_Title_2

So how did I like it ten years later? I liked it. It made much more sense now that I was older and more used to this kind of film style. The CGI was pretty good for a 2000’s film, and the backgrounds were just beautiful. The story was so-so, but cute and funny, except for the three deranged parts. I don’t think this would be a movie I would purchase to add to my collection, but I definitely will re-watch it in the future.

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2005TheBrothersGrimm

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To start Horrorfest IV from the beginning, go to You Cannot Conquer It. It Has Conquered You!: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

For the previous post, go to It’s Mrs. Archer. She’s on a Rampage!: Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958)

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For more Brothers Grimm, go to If the Shoe Fits: Why Cinderella is Actually Awesome

For more fairy tales, go to The Fans and the Furious

For more Horror-Comedies, go to I am the Chosen One. And I Choose to Be Shopping: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

For more on Heath Ledger, go to You’re Just Too Good to Be True: 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

For more on Matt Damon, go to A Horse’s Tale: Chinese New Year

Pride & Prescience (Or a Truth Universally Acknowledged)

Pride&Prescience

Pride & Prescience: Or a Truth Universally Acknowledged by Carrie Bebris

So as I’m sure you are aware, whether from reading my post Happy Birthday Pride & Prejudice; or perusing your local bookstore/library; there are a lot of sequels to Pride & Prejudice. But unlike those that write about the Darcy children, or married life of Lizzie & Darcy, this one is a mystery.

IndianaJonesHmmMaybe

Yeah, at first I wasn’t sure about it, but when I started reading it, I actually enjoyed it. I solved the mystery quickly, but it was very well written and worth reading. There were a few things I didn’t like, but I’ll save that until the end.

So are you ready to take on this mystery?

splitupScoobyDoo

So the book begins at the after-the-wedding-next-day-breakfast. Jane was just married to Bingley, and Elizabeth to Mr. Darcy. Elizabeth is happy about how everything went, and even more happy to be married to Darcy.

Double double yay

There is only one thing putting a damper on the event. Caroline Bingley.

hate her

Yep, Caroline has struck again. This time she has announced her engagement to an extremely wealthy,  American Southerner, Mr. Parrish.

How rude

Elizabeth is incredibly put out and part of her wants to say something, but instead she chooses to ignore it share her day, and just enjoy the fact that she is now Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy.

bekindBeright

However, Caroline’s sister’s do not adhere to this and even though it is Elizabeth’s wedding day, they delight in being cruel. Some people.

namesacceptselfShrek

The Darcy’s are planning on staying in Netherfield with the Bingley’s and then heading on to Pemberly as Elizabeth and Darcy are both eager to be home for the Christmas holidays.

heartPemberly

Unfortunately, Caroline Bingley once again throws a wrench in their plans. She is having the wedding this upcoming weekend in London.

you're evil

Yes it seems that Pemberly will have to wait. The Darcy’s have a duty to their friends and now relations, returning to the London house instead.

2013-11-27-bradpitt friends ugh slap face stupid

Oh well.

The house had been closed for the winter, and while the servants are hurriedly putting everything in its place, Elizabeth and Darcy head out for a hotel for dinner. There they meet some of Darcy’s friends, a part I really enjoyed as we don’t get to see that side in the Austen novel. More character depth is always welcome.

That is as long as it stays true to the original character. No secret adoptions, or having a child from a first marriage, or any of that nonsense.

Get it right

Get it right

There the Darcy’s find out from Lord Chatfield, Darcy’s friend, that Mr. Hurst, Caroline & Charles Bingley’s brother-in-law, has been making numerous bets and losing them. He did bet that Caroline would be engaged soon and must have been ecstatic when he heard the news of her and Mr. Parrish.

paris-whenitsizzlesaudreyhmmHepburn

The next day the two are off looking about London. One place they visit is the British Museum, which just opened with an exhibit on the supernatural.

TheDead

There are all sorts of items from the “New World”. Darcy is all practicality that it is nothing but silly superstitions, while Elizabeth wonders at the possibility of maybe there is more to it.

That Saturday, the Darcys find themselves at a dinner party being given by the Chatfields. Elizabeth finds herself seated next to Professor Julian Randolph; American, his field the supernatural, the one who donated the exhibit to the British Museum, and a close friend of Mr. Parrish.

coincidencegi

Professor Randolph has found himself forced to move from place to place, as universities find his work interesting, but not so to hire him full time. Elizabeth also notices his watch is no ordinary timepiece but covered in symbols, or “runes.”

suspicious  Hmm

After dinner the men and women are separated. In the smoking, brandy, and billiard room; Darcy finds himself accosted by Mr. Kendall. Mr. Kendall was an old partner of the late Mr. Bingley, Charles’ father, and embezzled from him. When the late Mr. Bingley discovered the subterfuge, he disbanded the partner ship, leaving Kendall with much more than he deserved. Even so, Kendall feels he has been cheated an has a lot of animosity for the Bingley’s, animosity that grows stronger as everyone believes Mr. Parrish thew over Miss Kendall for Miss Bingley.

ouch Hermione

Miss Kendall speaks to Elizabeth over a cup of tea, and tries to assure her that she is fine. But she isn’t. She spills tea everywhere and threatens that if Caroline and Mr. Parrish wed, Caroline will be very sorry.

notenoughChamomileTeaStopRage

Caroline’s wedding comes and is quite the shebang. Tons of people, mountains of food, opulent dresses, enormous rings. Everything she could ever want. The Darcys are happy that their London trip has reached a completion and go out to the theater that night as they plan to be leaving soon to the country and beloved Pemberley.

heartPemberly

After the play when they are heading home, they pass through a poor section of town, and who should they see? Caroline Parrish!

SayWhat?

Why would Caroline be there? And in her nightgown in the middle of the night? Darcy saves her from being mugged, and the two take her home. The whole trip there Caroline seems nothing like herself. Almost as if she was in a trance…or a zombie!

night of the living dead

After Darcy and Elizabeth return Caroline home, they can’t stop thinking how odd the whole thing was. Why would Caroline act in such a way? Mr. Parrish tried to reassure them that she must be sleepwalking, but the whole thing seems very odd.

strange things are afoot at the circle k

The next day, the Darcys head out to call on the Parrishes and see how Caroline is doing. There they discover that she has gone out riding. Riding! After a night like that you think she would be resting or something.

paris-whenitsizzlesaudreyhmmHepburn

And with Miss Kendall who practically confessed to hating Caroline’s guts.

Say What

As the Darcy’s are contemplating this, Caroline has fallen from her horse as it “mysteriously” bolted. Something is definitely not right here at all.

That's weird.

That’s weird.

Elizabeth goes to question Miss Kendall

Being questioned police Annex - Tierney, Gene (Laura)_03

But ends up getting nowhere.

Darcy and Elizabeth are finally ready to head off to Pemberley. They barely begin to make arrangements when…bum ba bum. You guessed it, they are stalled once again.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Caroline Bingley, oops Caroline Parrish (forgot she was married) was found with her wrists slashed in the kitchen. The doctor was able to save her, but he believes them to be self-inflicted.

That's weird.

That’s weird.

Caroline would never do such things, never. The Bingleys, Hursts, & Darcys find it extremely odd. Professor Randolph thinks it is just over-exhaustion from planning the Wedding of the Millennium in a week. Mr. Parrish decides to take her to his plantation in America for her to recover, but everyone nixes that idea. They know Caroline would just hate being sent there. Instead they are heading to Netherfield, the invitation extended to the Darcys, the Hursts, and Professor Randall, the hope being that all together could keep an eye on her and bring her former self back.

Let me just say that in this moment I thought the husband was behind it all. I wasn’t sure how just yet, but I was thinking drugs. To me, the fact that he married so quickly, and right after all this behavior starts up, and then he wants to remove her from her family to where he can either dispose her quickly in quite a few ways on the boat or in the U.S. He’s the one.

IDon'tTrustHimGreatGatsby

I mean she is extremely wealthy and is easy prey for a handsome man with charming qualities. I think he’s behind everything, because he wants her out of the way for her money.

Everyone thinks this is the perfect solution and set off for Nethefield. Upon arriving, Elizabeth can’t help to think this whole thing just seems off. Caroline with fragile nerves? She has the tenacity of a bear. Something is just not right.

wolfman 2010 inspector abberline hmm i've almost got it hugo weaving

But such thoughts are interrupted by the arrival of her mother. After she has invited all to dinner and left, Louisa Hurst tries to make fun of her with Caroline. But to Elizabeth and Jane’s shock, Caroline doesn’t make fun of her. Instead she just thanks the thoughtful gesture.

OMG

WHAT? CAROLINE IS ACTUALLY NICE!!!??? Now Elizabeth is certain something is definitely not right. Caroline would never miss out on an opportunity to make fun of the Bennets.

strange things are afoot at the circle k

On a side note, the whole Netherfield estate is run by people in need rather than trained servants. It’s pretty funny as I know that is exactly what Jane and Bingley would do. Too tenderhearted for their own good.

Anyways, back to the mystery. So Elizabeth heads over to the hothouse and sees Professor Randolph heavily concentrating on cutting leaves. He says they are spearmint and that he is using them to cure Caroline. He also keeps talking about the upcoming Winter Solstice.

Interesting, very interesting.

Interesting, very interesting.

Later that evening they all get into a discussion of reason vs. the supernatural. Professor Randolph is all for the unexplained, while Darcy is heavily a nay.

That night Elizabeth cannot sleep and hears something. She goes out and finds Caroline running around the hall. She tries to talk to her, but Caroline is just not responsive. Instead, Elizabeth deposits her with Mr. Parrish and goes back to her room. Is Caroline really sleepwalking? Why is all this happening so suddenly? (Well you all know what I think. It’s the husband.)

The next day the group set out for Longbourn, when the Bingley’s carriage overturns.

OMG

Jane and Bingley are okay, but they could have been killed. In fact, there coachman died. They all return to Netherfield and the local doctor is called in.

Now they believe the wheel probably came off for normal reasons, and that the Bingley’s nice but inexperienced help just didn’t realize it was in need of repairs. However, I am a devout mystery reader and was trained by the best, Agatha Christie, so I know that this is no mere coincidence, but someone was attempting to murder the Bingleys. I’m still gunning for Mr. Parrish, money as the motive.

Anyways, at the house it turns out that Mr. Kendall has been waiting quite some time to speak to Mr. Bingley. He arrived just after the group set off (meaning he could have tampered with the wheel, and then “arrived” after they all left to give himself an alibi.) Hmm…

paris-whenitsizzlesaudreyhmmHepburn

Mr. Kendall doesn’t care that Mr. Bingley has just been in an accident but demands to see him. And of course, sweet Bingley agrees. Darcy also accompanies them, as he knows without him, Bingley would sign himself over.

Mr. Kendall once again starts charging the family with holding money that is rightfully his. He threatens to take them to court, when Darcy presents his trump card. The Bingleys have proof of his embezzlement and if they do go to court all of England will find out about that and the Kendalls will most likely have to either head to the continent (Europe) or the New World.

Gotcha!

Gotcha!

Mr Kendall is enraged and threatens that he will have his revenge on the Bingley family, no one can stop him. He then storms out, only to storm back in as extreme snow is forcing him to be unable to travel.

the irony iron

Elizabeth keeps dreaming of the carriage wheel falling off, seeing it vividly even though she never witnessed it. She wakes up, and feels that something is not quite right. It is the middle of the night, and all appears to be well, but Elizabeth decides to take a stroll through the house in hopes to calm her mind. She sees a light coming from the library and assumes it must be Bingley, but when she gets closer it is Mr. Kendall and he is rifling through Bingley’s desk. He must be looking for the embezzlement papers! She hides into the next room, until Kendall returns upstairs, and just as she is to go back to her room she spots Caroline. Once again Caroline is pulling a Mrs. Rochester and roaming the house at night. Elizabeth heads toward her to take her back to her room, but after Caroline spots her she returns on her own. Elizabeth goes back to her own room where she tells Darcy about Kendall.

Darcy decides to move the papers and the two go back to sleep. Just as Elizabeth has slipped off to dreamland, she is awakened once more by the calling if her name. She wakes up and realizes that it must have been a dream, but then sees that there is smoke in the room, and FIRE!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She wakes Darcy, and they quickly wake everyone else up, moving them out of the house. Mr. Bingley and Jane are alright, but they have the worst of the smoke damage as the fire was started outside their room. The Hursts are quite okay, as they were wakened before it was too bad in their wing. Mr. Kendall is also, unfortunately, well as is Mr. Parrish and Professor Randolph. But no one can find Caroline.

Mrs. Hurst is complaining about clothes and being put out, etc, etc. But Elizabeth stops listening as she realizes something very odd. When she was calling there was a fire, Mr. Kendall came running down the stairs, fully dressed. While everyone else is in their night clothes, he is the only one who is dressed right. Pretty strange for a man who had “gone to bed.” Hmmm….almost as if he had known…

Interesting, very interesting.

Interesting, very interesting.

The search for Caroline turns out to be a futile one. Yep, they had her with them the whole time. Caroline is strangely dressed in maid’s clothing, so in the confusion everyone assumed she was a maid. She is badly burned, especially her left hand. They try to question her, but once again Caroline can’t remember. Ever since this whole “thing” started Caroline has been suffering from blackouts. The worst part of the burn is her left fingers, and they try to remove her wedding ring, but Caroline won’t let them.

Mr. Parrish talks to Elizabeth aside from the group and tells her he fears he may have married Mrs. Rochester (not really that’s what I’m calling her). For those of you who have never read any books from the Bronte sisters, Mr. Parrish believes that Caroline may have set the fire and tried to murder her brother and sister-in-law. He now is considering the possibility that an insane asylum is the best way to go.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! Insane asylums were horrible back in the day. Just horrible. And once you are committed, you would never come out. Men who wanted their wives only for their money, if they didn’t have family members willing to protect them, they would have them committed. Their word was stronger than the “insane” one. Horrible, horrible places. You can say there all kinds of things wrong with mental health facilities today, but none will ever be as bad as back then.

Darcy returns from leading the fire brigade. It turns out that the house wasn’t too damaged, the worst occuring at the master suite while the rest just need airing out from the smoke. The Hursts, Parrishs, Professor Randolph, and Jane go to Longbourn while the clean up is overseen by Darcy and Bingley. Elizabeth remains to be with Darcy, while Mr. Kendall stays as the sky looks bad, (in reality he wants to snoop more).

When Darcy investigates the fire, he finds pieces of Jane’s silver dress in the location of where it started. Weird how they got there as the dress was last seen hanging in the closet. Elizabeth also tells Darcy about her suspicions surrounding Mr. Kendall, and his explanation that he had “fallen asleep in his clothes.” She also tells him about Mr. Parrish’s suspicions of Caroline.

paris-whenitsizzlesaudreyhmmHepburn

After everyone has returned, Elizabeth overhears Caroline talking to someone and making fun of her family. While in the past this has angered Elizabeth, she readily welcomes it as it is a sign of the old Caroline. However, when she peeks into the room she sees that Caroline is actually talking to herself.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

Later Elizabeth is asked to sit in during one of Professor Randolph and Caroline’s sessions, as Professor Randolph can’t locate Mr. Parrish. He questions Caroline and she is her normal irritable self and in pain over her ring. Professor Randolph has spearmint around and speaks some phrases in a low voice.

That night is not fun at all. Mr. Kendall is completely rude and insulting. He makes digs at Caroline, insinuates that Mr. Parrish is not all that he seems but a rotter, and that Mr. Hurst is a river rat gambler.

Interesting, very interesting.

Interesting, very interesting.

Darcy and Elizabeth discuss Mr. Kendall’s comments. Could Mr. Hurst be gambling all his money away? Is Mr. Parrish a snake? Is Caroline too far gone for help?

Elizabeth starts thinking about why all this is happening. Could Mr. Hurst have gambled all his money away and is trying to kill Bingley, Jane, and Caroline so that he inherits? Could Mr. Kendall be trying to kill them all? Mr. Darcy is not wholly convinced, but decides to write to friends for some info on Hurst, and keep a close eye on Kendall.

Later, Elizabeth is working on needlework when she is approached by Mr. Parrish. He is attempting a custom he heard about in New Orleans about taking the hair of friends and family to create a good luck charm. He asks for her hair, but Elizabeth refuses, partly because she is not really a friend of Caroline, and because Darcy would be furious that she gave her hair to any man but him. You have to remember that giving of your hair symbolized a very close relationship. Usually the two were engaged, close friends, or related.

uh-no-gif

Darcy and Bingley are discussing the repairs of the house and the landlord, when they set off to the billiard room to play pool. There they discover Hurst and Kendall playing, with Hurst not looking as if he is really enjoying himself. Hurst takes off, and Bingley is called away; leaving Darcy with Mr. Kendall.

Karen stop talking

Without any excuse, Darcy plays a game with Kendall. Mr. Kendall talks to Darcy about his dislike for Mr. Parrish. Apparently he was the one who stopped the engagement, contrary to what has been said around town. He thought that Mr. Parrish was too forward, asking his daughter for a lock of hair before he even declared himself. Luckily for Darcy, Mr. Parrish comes in and tells Darcy that Bingley needs him.

Elizabeth and Jane are looking at the poorly hung Christmas decorations. Elizabeth leaves her to grab her bonnet for a walk when she sees Mr. Randolph and Caroline having a session, alone, and no ordinary one. Leaves have been scattered all around her and Professor Randolph is speaking some strange words over her and pressing an object into her left hand. Caroline looked deathly pale. Elizabeth also starts feeling strange, as if the words are coming over her as well.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

Elizabeth interrupts them and Professor Randolph acts very suspicious. Not answering any of Elizabeth’s questions at all. Elizabeth finds herself questioning, what this man is really about. Especially when he asks her to keep all that she has seen a secret from everyone.

So now they are up to three suspects.

  1. Mr. Kendall– He could be trying to kill the Bingleys because of the money he feels that he has been cheated out of. He also could be trying to get rid of Caroline because of his daughter being thrown over. Remember, his daughter was with Caroline when her horse bolted.
  2. Mr. Hurst– If his debts are as extremely high as Elizabeth suspects, he might be trying to kill his relations off for money.
  3. 3) Professor Randolph– Professor Randolph has been drifting from place to place as most don’t feel his studies are legitimate. Now that Caroline is crazy, he has room and board as the prime caretaker for Caroline. Maybe he is making her seem crazy, and could even be trying to make it look as if she set the fire, to only further cement Mr. Parrish’s need of him.

And of course my pick, 4) Mr. Parrish- He only married Caroline for her money and is trying to remove her from the picture. He is supposed to be extremely wealthy, but for some people what they have is never enough. Besides, he could be lying about how wealthy he is, or have hidden debt that they don’t know about.

IndianaJonesHmmMaybe

Elizabeth tells Mr. Parrish about the session she saw, and he becomes incensed. He yells at Professor Randolph, nearly knocking him down the stairs.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

Mr. Parrish once again brings up the idea of placing Caroline in an insane asylum. To Elizabeth and Darcy’s shock, her family actually is considering doing it. They suggest getting her a nurse, but that idea is shot down. Professor Randolph doesn’t agree as he thinks that Carolin is improving. In fact, he believes a few more sessions with him will help her. But Parrish cuts him off, letting him know that his help is no longer necessary. In fact, as soon as the storm ends Professor Randolph is whole-heartedly invited to leave.

ouch Hermione

 Mr. Darcy receives a letter from his friend, regarding Mr. Hurst. Mr. Hurst had been gambling a lot and owes a whole ton of money. To makes things worse, Mr. Kendall bought up all his IOUs. Buying IOUs was very popular then. Let’s say Steve owes Tom, Dick, and Harry $5 each. George buys the IOUs from the three, paying what is owed. Now Steve owes George $15.  Not only was it beneficial to the person who was owed money, but the person who bought up the IOUs, espechially the big ones, was now in a position of power over the others.

Seeing as Hurst has huge debts, and now is indebted to Kendall, it makes him a much stronger suspect. He might be trying to kill the Bingleys to inherit or doing the dirty work of Mr. Kendall.

The plot thickens

The plot thickens

While the Darcys are going to ask Kendall more questions, they discover his body. Now the question who is trying to kill the Bingleys and who killed Kendall?

*******Attention*******

If you wish to not have the ending spoiled then stop reading. Know that I enjoyed this book immensely, except for a later “supernatural” part. I think that this is something all Austen fans should check out. For those who are okay with me telling them the end, continue.

So now things have changed. Either there are two murderers, one after the Bingleys and the other after Mr. Kendall, or this is one. But why and who?

  1. Mr. Hurst- As stated before, he could have been trying to kill the Bingleys either for the money or because Mr. Kendall is using his debts to force him too. He could have killed Kendall because of his debts to him or to stop him from trying to murder his extended family.
  2. Professor Randolph– Trying to kill the Bingleys, but making it look like Caroline in order to keep a position in the house. Maybe Mr. Kendall knew somthing about him? It’s a weak reason, I know.
  3. Mr. Parrish– Killing the Bingleys for money, killed Mr. Hurst because he knew more about him than Mr. Parrish wanted to be public.

Mrs. Hurst is excused from being a suspect as she is too stupid, and of course Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth, Jane, and Bingley aren’t suspects.

As they further search the crime scene, they discover signs written out in the dust on the floor, the same signs Elizabeth saw on Professor Randolph’s watch. The same watch in the dead man’s clutches

Mal_huh Whoa Wow what

When Professor Randolph is questioned, he says that he misplaced his watch. But did he really? But if it was him, why would he leave signs on the ground that would clearly trace everything back to him?

Interesting, very interesting.

Interesting, very interesting.

Professor Randolph tries to get Elizabeth to give him his watch back as Darcy has it. Or forgive me, I forgot to mention that the constable is a bumbling fool and Mr. Darcy is the one who really takes charge of the situation.

Anyways, the rest of the group is questioned, but no one really has anything to help. Elizabeth speaks to Darcy about her suspicions of Professor Randolph. The pentagram symbol on the floor, the way he acted about the watch, the death on the winter solstice, etc. Elizabeth also believes that something unnatural is going on, she can feel it.

supernatural supernatural

Darcy doesn’t agree with her feelings, although he agrees the evidence is pointing toward Professor Randolph.

To only make things better, Miss Kendall descends on the house angry and demanding to know who murdered her father. And Professor Randolph has disappeared.

Of course

None of the maids want to be around Caroline as they are afraid that she is going to hurt them as she is “crazy.” Elizabeth goes in to talk to her and helps take the ring off that has been hurting her finger. As soon as the ring is off, it is as if Caroline has awaken from her haze, she tries to tell Elizabeth something, but is interrupted by Mr. Parrish, who promptly puts the ring back on.

Afterwards, Elizabeth finds herself questioning her suspicions of Professor Randolph. The watch seems to call to her, and she remembers that Professor Randolph had the watch on Caroline’s left hand. And that even though Caroline is right handed her left was injured. And that Caroline has been trying to get rid of the ring on her left hand. Hmm…

Interesting, very interesting.

Interesting, very interesting.

The ring! There is something in that ring. The last time Caroline was normal, she had removed her ring briefly. Professor Randolph must have enchanted it and is controlling her. Darcy doesn’t believe her, so Elizabeth sets off on her own to get that ring off Caroline’s finger on her own.

Darcy goes to look through Mr. Kendall’s things to see if there is something that might lead to the answers of his death. He comes upon Miss Kendall already looking through Mr. Kendall’s papers, and she hands Darcy a letter. The letter says that Mr. Parrish is not who he says he is but a conman known as Jack Diamond. He is a pickpocket, swindler, and murderer. Professor Randolph is a professor, like he said, and frequents pawn shops (unknown as why). Darcy puts all the pieces together, and sets off to find him.

I-got-this-reaction-gif

Meanwhile, Elizabeth goes to see Caroline, intent on removing the ring. She is interrupted by Mr. Parrish and shares her thoughts. Mr. Parrish is not happy as he was the one who cursed the ring. He has bewitched the wedding bands so that he controls Caroline. He killed Kendall too.

He has Caroline tie up Elizabeth, as he contemplates what to do with her. Elizabeth’s maid comes by looking for her, but Mr. Parrish gets rid if her.  Mr. Darcy forces himself in with Mr. Bingley’s pistol, but is forced to concede when he sees Elizabeth held up by knifepoint. Mr. Parrish tosses the gun to Caroline, having her watch over the two. Mr. Parrish decides he is going to take Elizabeth with him, and will ransom her for all of Darcy’s money.

you're evil

Footsteps come down the hallway and Mr. Parrish runs to the door, with the dagger to keep any from coming in. Darcy grabs the fireplace poker to use against him. As Caroline points the gun at Darcy, Elizabeth uses her weight to knock Caroline down. As everyone is struggling and fighting, Bingley and Professor Randolph come in. Mr. Parrish uses the “good luck amulet” to control Bingley and stop Professor Randolph. Professor Randolph yells at Elizabeth to use his amulet, the watch on Caroline. She does and reduces the power. Eventually all overpower Parrish and remove his objects of control.

Professor Randolph uses an oak rod from the museum exhibit, taps it on the objects and says a few words. He “removes” all the power from the objects. He explains that the rings were from the 16th century and that they had been commissioned by a marquis who was jealous of his wife. Professor Randolph wanted to purchase them, but had no money to do so. He met Mr. Parrish, who purchased the rings, paid for Professor Randolph to come with him to America, would possibly fund his next expedition, and could introduce him to other wealthy patrons. Parrish was also very interested in all his work and asked him a gazillion questions. Professor Randolph taught him a charm to make him not in complete control of those he has a lock of hair from, but able to make strong suggestions.

In the end the Darcys finally make it to Pemberley for Christmas

victorian_christmas room decorated for christmas

Mr. Parrish was imprisoned and Caroline began the process of a divorce. The Hursts debts forced them to depart for the continent. Jane and Bingley resumed life as normal, and began searching for a house to buy. Miss Kendall inherited everything from her father, and married. Professor Randolph was able to make it out of the whole drama okay. He believes that Elizabeth has “the power” and offers to help her any time be able to understand and control her gift.

TheEnd_Title_2

So I liked the book as I felt it stayed true to the characters, while at the same time Carrie Bebris was able to put her own spin on them. The mystery was good, even though I figured it out very fast. The only think I didn’t like was Elizabeth’s “supernatural” powers. I don’t like supernatural mysteries, so I would have kept that out, but otherwise it was very good novel and I’m looking forward to reading its sequel.

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For more Pride & Prejudice, go to Mr. Darcy Broke My Heart

For more retellings of Pride & Prejudice, go to The Accidental Bride

For more on works inspired by Jane Austen’s Pride & Prejudice, go to Happy Birthday Pride & Prejudice

For more mysteries, go to A Whole Lot of Fanfare

The Accidental Bride

the accidental bride

The Accidental Bride: A Romantic Comedy by Janice Harayda

This book was recommended to me by Goodreads, based on one of the books I have read in the past (I can’t quite remember which one). It sounded interesting: a woman is planning on getting married, but a month before her wedding she starts having second thoughts. Is this really what she wants? As her family and friends are all forcing her hand, she turns to her love of Jane Austen to pull her through. Sounds great right?

howtheGrinchstoleChristmasWrongo

I HATED IT!

Hate YOu

It just was so, urgh the main character was too annoying.

Person hate talking

But let’s wait a moment before we go there. So the book is a Bridget Jones’ Diary style adaption of Pride and Prejudice. The main character is Lily Blair (LB like Lizzie Bennet) who is from an upper class but not old money super wealthy family. Her mother is a meddler (like Mrs. Bennet) who has dreamed of the day her daughter is married off for years (just like Mrs. Bennet). Lily’s fiancé is from an old, established family with a ton of money (third wealthiest in Ohio), and a lawyer (just like in Bridget Jones’ Diary), named Mark (just like BJD) Danforth [M.D like Mr. Darcy].

They'reExactlytheSame

There is even a woman after Mark named Caroline, just like in Pride and Prejudice when Caroline Bingley uses every trick she can to get Darcy, but he’s not interested.

uh-no-gif

So why did I dislike the book? Two words Lily Blair.

hate her

First of all she has no reason for breaking off the wedding. It’s not that she is unsure she wants to spend the rest of her life with Mark, or that she is unsure if she wants to stay in Ohio, or that she thinks her life is taking her in a new direction away from Mark, or that she has a great job offer, OR ANY OF THOSE THINGS! She just wakes up one morning and says she wants to cancel.

Say What

Yeah. With no thought to how this will affect her fiancé, family, or the fact that a ton of money has been spent. And the worst thing is that she doesn’t even feel remorse for this! She’s just like, “women don’t need to be married to be happy.” “Most marriages end in divorce anyway.” Where was this attitude months ago? How can you just do that to your fiancé without feeling bad or sorry or anything???!!!!!!!!!!!!

ThewomenBadnameBitch

I mean come on, that’s cruel, horrible, selfish, and immature.

And there is no reason to dump him. He’s kind, sweet, considerate, understanding, dependable, handsome…i.e:

Perfect Boyfriend

I mean it’s like when Meg Ryan dumped Bill Pullman in Sleepless in Seattle. Why would you? Bull Pullman’s such an amazingly sweet guy. It just makes no sense! And at least in Sleepless in Seattle, Meg Ryan felt bad about it. In here, Lily cares zip for how this affects anyone.

ThatThingYouDoBreakMyHeart

And then Lily starts complaining about her life. Her newspaper in New York was being downsized so she moved home, got a job there, an apartment, but oh no woe is me! I had to move home! I have to live in a “small town”. I have a rich, perfect, boyfriend. I come from a family with money. Life is so hard.

boohoo_zps058c9fe1

Come on,

Girl Please

Get over yourself. So what if New York didn’t turn out how you wanted it. Life is pretty amazing. I know plenty who would love that life. I would love that life.

So you see, she was just so darn annoying that I found the book a total dud.

Get it right

Ugh!

And Mark deserves way better than Lily.

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For more works based on Jane Austen, go to The Sense and Sensibility Screenplay & Diaries

For more on Pride & Prejudice, go to Fall For You

For more on Sleepless in Seattle, go to Part VIII: The Little Movie Line List

Fall For You

FallForYOuJaneAustenAcademyCecilia Gray

Fall for You (Jane Austen Academy #1) by Cecilia Gray

*Warning: Contains Spoilers*

So in this Jane Austen inspired work, Cecilia Gray takes the characters of Jane Austen’s novels and puts them in high school together, pairing up who would be friends and having them live in modern times. She chose the characters Elizabeth Bennet, Elinor Dashwood, Emma Woodhouse, Catherine Moreland, and Anne Elliot.

Now this is something I have thought of too. Now I consider the main characters of the novels to be Elizabeth Bennet, Elinor Dashwood, Marianne Dashwood, Fanny Price, Emma Woodhouse, Catherine Moreland, and Anne Elliot. For me, I would have pegged Emma and Anne as best friends as both were raised in the same manner with money. Anne is also more passive and listens to advice given by friends, the qualities that Emma enjoys in others. Catherine and Marianne always seemed a great match to me, as both love reading and have overactive imaginations. I could see Elizabeth and Elinor as well as Elinor has a level-headed, cool, calm, and collected personality that Charlotte, Elizabeth’s best friend, also had.

AustenHeros

So the girls all go to an all girls’ boarding school in Merryton, CA. The founders of the school were the Elliots, in this book called the Escobars, Anne’s family, and named it the Jane Austen Academy. However this year is different, as the Elliot family have lost a lot of money and had to sell the school. The new owners want to remain anonymous, and have opened the doors to boys.

This gets Lizzy Egmont (I don’t know why she didn’t just use Bennet as she is Elizabeth Bennet) very upset as she feels it is going against the values of the school and that boys will ruin everything. This is something I didn’t like as the author made Lizzy like some man-hater and against all boys in general.

HateYou

Lizzie is an only child from Chicago, where her parents are doctors, poor, and too busy for her. Now this is something that I didn’t really like either. Lizzie needs the interactions of her other siblings, as that helps make up her character. And Lizzie isn’t the only one who loses her siblings, every character in this (besides Darcy) is an only child. Really, I mean for Elinor this is horrible as she and Marianne are yin and yang. Elinor sense and Marianne sensibility. Without each other, who are they?

Weird

Weird

And if her parents are doctors and poor (which could happen) how can they afford to send her every year to a boarding school? That makes no sense. And her parents ignore her? One of the cutest things in Pride & Prejudice is the relationship between Lizzie and her father.

Pride&PrejudiceMrBennetandElizabethBennet

Yeah that is majorly upsetting and… wait I shouldn’t rant. Moving on.

So Lizzie is excited to live with her best friend Ellie Dvorak (Elinor Dashwood). Ellie is the child of yoga instructors and very zen “whatever happens will work out” type of person. She’s the complete opposite of the actual Elinor Dashwood character. And I didn’t like that at all.

NotLiketheBook

However, Lizzie discovers that not only did she have to share a ride with her, but Lizzie is also having to room with her nemesis…Anne Escobar (Anne Elliot). Lizzie hates Anne because everything was just given to her as her parents owned the school. Ellie is rooming with Emma, a rich girl more interested in clothes and having fun. Everything Lizzie is not.

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Lizzie and Anne don’t agree on being roommates and the two go to see the headmistress, Katherine Berg (Catherine de Berg). As they are waiting they overhear the headmistress talking with someone else and saying how she wants to destroy everything the Academy was and make it something new. Change the name, change the curriculum, etc.

OMG

When they speak to the headmistress, she won’t let them switch. And to make it worse she promises them that if they room together, she’ll give Lizzie the job of managing editor (perfect blackmail as she wants to be a journalist and has been coveting that spot) and Anne will be in charge of the “Welcome Back Dance”, (what she has been in charge of since the beginning of time). At first both balk at this, but decide it’s best to team up in order to take Ms. Berg down and stop the changes she is trying to make.

floral-bonnet-gifIWillEndYouFirefly

Part of this deal is that they have to do in depth profiles of certain new guys brought into the school. New students such as Dante Braxton (Fitzwilliam Darcy). However, to get back at Headmistress Berg, Lizzie and Anne decide to make the “Welcome Back Dance” a Regency inspired ball.

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Anne and Lizzie start bonding and discovering more about each other. Lizzie starts understanding Anne’s pain of losing everything, and Anne understands Lizzie’s drive for truth and justice.

The next day the two are in the “newsroom”, in which Lizzie thrives in her role as editor and meets the very thing she doesn’t like, boys.

ew! Gross Yuck

Dante enters with the other two guys that Lizzie and Anne have to interview, Rick Wright (Fredrick Wentworth from Persuasion) and actor Josh Wickham (George Wickham from Pride & Prejudice).

Now this is something else Cecilia Gray changes. Wickham has no role in this book at all. He’s there for the interview and that’s it. He’s not the guy Lizzie crushes on for a while, he’s not evil as he was in the book, he’s nothing. I don’t know whether she is going to change his whole role (as she already did with his backstory) or save his destructive side for later books. All I can say, it’s not Pride & Prejudice with Wickham being a nice guy.

Get it right

Get it right

Besides the guys, Dante also brings his little sister Georgiana. He is extremely overprotective of her, and his protectiveness is misconstrued by Lizzie to be super controlling of his sister.  Lizzie is trying to take down Dante’s “control” by assigning Georgiana to interviewing Josh. She also assigns Anne to interview Rick as they seem to know each other. Lizzie gives herself Dante.

She starts questioning him and notices his attractiveness:

Pick whichever look you prefer

Pick whichever look you prefer the most

She starts questioning him and gets on the scent that he knows more about the new owners of the school then he is trying to let on. Georgiana interrupts them; with her, Dante, Rick, and Josh all leaving abruptly. Lizzie finds it strange and starts to discuss it with Anne, seeing that her interview was pretty stilted and just plain bad. Lizzie starts to push Anne to find out what her past was with Rick, but stops and instead is just a friend, joining her for dinner.

Friendjustbethere

While Lizzie and Anne’s friendship is growing, Lizzie and Ellie’s relationship is going through some rough times. Lizzie is jealous with how close Ellie and Emma are getting and vows to get everything back to “normal”.

Soon it is time for the dance and the ladies look lovely.

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Lizzie is ready to head to the dance, but Emma got them dates. Edward (Edward Ferras from Sense & Sensibility) is Ellie’s date, Emma got Dante, and Lizzie is teamed up with Rick. Lizzie leaves the group to hang out with Anne, and both are thrilled that the dance was a success and everything is beautiful.

Anne sees Rick dancing with other girls and is heartbroken. She runs outside and Lizzie follows her, to comfort her. While they are talking, Dante and Rick come outside discussing things, not realizing that the girls are there.

OhNOthisisgonnabebad

 They overhear the boys talking and find out more than they wish.

  • “Edward will be in the middle of a catfight if he keeps acting this way”- Is there another girl besides Ellie that he is with? Is he cheating on his girlfriend? (Those who have read Sense & Sensibility know the answer to that.
  • Darcy excuse me Dante, wants to get a scholarship to Georgetown, the same school that Lizzy wants to go. (This makes me wonder why uber rich Dante needs a scholarship to Georgetown? His family has gazillions so can’t they use some of that to pay for his education? Whatever.)

So yeah, instead of outright dissing Lizzie like in the book, Dante just states he’s not interested in any girl and wants to go to Georgetown. Now I thought it was a huge faux pas on the writer’s behalf. Dante did nothing to outright insult Lizzie. In the book Pride and Prejudice he does and you agree with Lizzie’s anger as you see it as justified. He was a total jerk, and because of her hurt of pride at that remark she readily believes Wickham’s lies about the rest of Darcy’s character. In this, Lizzie has no reason to be mad at him, making any anger unjustifiable, and instead of a sympathetic character she looks like a brat.

See Hook agrees with me.

See Hook agrees with me.

Lizzie and Anne go back to the dance, having a great time. They run into Georgiana and convince her to come back to journalism. She worries about what her brother might say, but ends up agreeing to join. Dante approaches Lizzie to ask her to dance, but Lizzie immediately pounces on him, calling him a jerk because he is trying to control his sister. I thought once again this made Lizzie seem rude and not as likeable as she doesn’t even know the family dynamics but is yelling at him, and also because Lizzie would never discuss this in a public forum, but would wait to have a more private conversation.

she'sallthatembarrassmefreddyprincejr

After Lizzie rails on him, Dante apologizes for being a bit overprotective and agrees that maybe Lizzie was right in his being a bit too controlling. Instead of graciously accepting, she throws in another dig and storms off.

How rude

I mean:

Girl Please

He just admitted he was wrong! Give the guy a bit of slack. Especially since he hasn’t really been a jerk, in fact you are the one acting jerky!

They continue dancing, but then Headmistress Berg drops the mother of all bombs, she announces that the Jane Austen Academy is no longer going to exist, the next year will show a massive overhaul of everything and a new name.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

But Lizzie will not be deterred. She is determined to save the academy.

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The next day in Journalism, Lizzie sends everyone sccurying to cover the bomb Headmistress Berg so delightfully dropped.

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Curse you Headmistress Berg!

When they are surprised by Rick’s mother. Lizzie had contacted her for background information, but Mrs. Wright decided to come in person to answer any questions and bring photos for the spread.

There is also this weird subplot where Lizzie keeps thinking of Dante and finds herself disgusted at being so focused on him, as yuck a boy. All I can say is:

Tom-Hanks-Saying-Really

I mean you seem to be going out a little far there with the “I Hate Boys”. I mean it’s not like she is 10 or 12, she is a teenager, and most teens are interested in the opposite sex. Maybe they all don’t want a girlfriend or boyfriend, but they are interested. I mean I could buy the disgusted that she could be like one of those girls who is always giggling at boys or one of those girls who changes everything about themselves for a boy. But really? Being disgusted at the thought of being interested in a boy? That’s really strange.

Mmhm great gatsby

Anyways, back to the book. Dante and Lizzie discuss Georgiana. Dante acceding once again that he was wrong in thinking newspaper wasn’t for Georgiana. Lizzie also discovers that he has parent issues, of which she can relate. (Although in P&P both Lizzie and Darcy had close relationships with their dads. It seems to me you could have the whole bonding over parents done the same way with them keeping those special links to their dads. But that’s just me I guess.)

We learn more about Rick’s character from his mom. He was doing so well at the Naval Academy, but transferred home because his mother became sick. Now this also doesn’t make sense to me. Dante and Edward were born rich, going to the best schools. It makes sense that in some point in time their histories linked up and they became best buds. But Rick was poor, and then become rich AND was at a Naval Academy. How did he meet up with the other boys to become best buddies? I don’t know. I guess when you try and meld different people from different backgrounds, histories, and events you are going to get weird holes like this. I’ll just move on.

dean whinchester shrug smile oh well

So Lizzie and Anne are invited to spend the weekend at the Wright household, where Edward, Dante, and Rick (of course) will also be staying. At first the girls don’t want to, but when Lizzie hears a snippet about Mrs. Wright being one of the new buyers of the Academy, she sees it as he perfect time to snoop.

perfect plan

Lizzie heads out to eat with Ellie, when she is stopped by Dante. Dante questions if she is coming over this weekend to the Wrights. She gets all offended, why? IDK. Then she heads over to Ellie and to her chagrin, Emma.

Ellie is hurt when she finds out that Lizzie is going to a guy’s house with Anne, instead of hanging out with her. Lizzie assures her that things aren’t changing, she just wants to find out who the new owners are. Besides the “awful” Dante will be there. (He’s not even awful!) Ellie is all hurt about what Dante said about Elizabeth, but he wasn’t even that horrible. I mean…I already talked about that. I better move on.

Emma and Ellie make plans for the weekend which upsets Lizzie. Now I totally get this, it’s hard when your best friend is spending so much time with someone else.

bestfriendmakes plans with someone else

So that weekend they head out to the Wright’s place, er amazing mansion. Anne and Georgina feel at home, as they are from wealthy families, or in Anne’s case used to be wealthy. Lizzie is starting to feel uncomfortable.

They go to their rooms and Lizzie is floored with the beauty of the place.

That's a lot!

So everyone heads down to the pool and dinner, while Lizzy stays behind to “groom”. In reality, she is investigating the house. She starts to psych out a bit, but if she is going to be an investigative reporter, then she has to go for it.

KeepCalmSleuthOn

She finds herself in the office, with lots of photographs. She starts trying to memorize them, when she is interrupted by a voice.

OhNOthisisgonnabebad

And it’s Dante!

Crap

It just had to be him, huh.

Lizzie tries to explain that she got lost on the way to the lake. Dante doesn’t say anything. When they get down there, Lizzie talks to Anne. She finds out that Anne really wants Rick back, but is scared. And you can’t blame her, relationships are scary.

truthaboutdatingTogetherForeverorbreakup

While everything is fun, Lizzie still has her eyes on the prize. She fakes a cramp to get back in the house, BUT by doing so she inadvertently causes Dante to dive in and save her. He goes and carries her put of the water.

Col. Brandon carrying Marianne

Lizzie tries to assure everyone that she is fine, but a part of her is pleased to have been in Mr. Darcy’s, I mean Dante’s arms. And who can blame her?

Mr.DarcySexyPridePrej

Lizzie is able to reassure everyone that she is okay, and takes off upstairs to change and get ready for dinner. She hurriedly changes her clothes and runs back to the office.

She begins taking pics with her phone, spotting a younger image of Rick and Dante. In it Dante looks incredibly happy.

Then she hears a creak behind her, and “That was taken three years ago.”

Busted!

Oops!

Crap

And it is Dante! Uh, oh.

Dante asks her what she is doing, as he knows it is more than just “lost”. Lizzie has nothing else to do but come clean. Dante questions her about researching those in the photo when there is over 50 people in them. Just a part of the biz, Lizzie replies.

Darcy, Dante then goes on to tell her not only an incredibly charming memory of him and his sister. He then, to Lizzie’s surprise, begins to tell her who each person in the photos are. When Lizzie asks him why, he says because he wants to.

How romantic

How sweet!

He gives her everything, completely open. In fact, if Lizzie wanted to ask him who the owners are he probably would have said right away. But, she doesn’t want to be a reporter around him. Instead she wants to know all about him.

Grease Tell Me more

They get called down for dinner, and go on.

That night Lizzie is trying to figure out which of them are the owners, why she is feelings this way about Dante…that is until Anne comes in. Anne stays the night in her room as Anne’s is freezing cold. Lizzie quizzes her about the *real story* behind her and Rick. But Anne still won’t give her much about it. Lizzie convinces her to try again for Rick.

The next day the group is playing pool, when Anne smokes them all. Lizzie tries to use this opportunity to match up Anne and Rick, but it doesn’t work out.

nightmare before christmas nothing turn out like it should

But she and Darcy team up to learn more about the owners. Lizzie also asks him about Georgiana, and how she suspects there is something she is hiding. Darcy, I mean Dante (I am so bad at this, tell me why did she change his name again?), Dante says nothing, but Lizzie knows there is more. She cares about Georgina though, so she lets it go as is.

They talk more and Lizzie concludes that she was wrong about Dante, that there was more. Darcy, Dante, says that he is very guarded.

Pride&PrejudiceDarcydon'ttalktostrangerseasily

And that he has trusted people before, and is very careful about who he trusts from now on.

Trust

The two have a big moment alone in the stairs.

swoon dreamy

And Lizzie is hooked.

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Lizzie goes up to the room to change and her mind is reeling over what happened. Anne comes in excited as she and Rick had a great time as well.

That night at dinner Rick is acting weird again and is all cold to Anne.

VeronicaMarsBrokenUpbutNot

Lizzie goes to her room and packs everything up, ready to return to school. She Is looking for Anne, when she finds out that she has already left. Dante, Georgiana, and Rick are also off horseback riding. Lizzie is completely confused.

What! Mark Wahlberg that's weird

What is up with everyone?

She and Edward ride back to school together and Lizzie uses this time to grill Edward on the Anne/Rick drama. He tells him that back in the day, Rick lost his head over Anne and she broke his heart before he left for the Naval Academy. Dante saw that Rick was starting to fall for Anne again, and cautioned him to not give her a second chance. When Rick left for the Naval Acdemy, he wanted to continue dating Anne, but Anne’s mother convinced her to dump him. And who wants a women who can be easily swayed?

OhNOthisisgonnabebad

Then Edward asks her why she and Darcy kept ducking out. Lizzie knows she has to give some back, so she tells them they were looking into who the owners are. This confuses Edward as he knows…or thought the owners were Dante’s parents.

There is always a but

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Crap

HE PLAYED HER!

Ryan-Gosling-Oh-No-You-Didnt-Half-Nelson

And that means one thing and one thing only, revenge!

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Lizzie is hurt and upset over this. How could she trust him? How was she was so stupid?

what-not-to-say-to-broken-hearted-girl-3what went wrong holiday

She is by herself when the door is thrust open, and there is Dante. He tells her that he had a ton of fun that weekend, that he loved how she defended Georgiana, and that he couldn’t stop thinking of her, hoping she would go out with him.

Mr.Darcy Pride&Prejudice

And Lizzie is like

IDon'tevenknowhowtorespondGilmoreGirls

How could he be so cruel to play her and then try to ask her out? She turns him down cold.

HearthasNoRoom

Lizzie rips him a new one. She is furious that he destroyed Anne’s new chance at happiness (I have to admit I did think that was a clever way to do the Charles & Jane story arc). But even more that he helped her “investigate” when his parents are the ones who own the school!

Jerk

Darcy says it’s true, but Georgiana knows nothing about it. He asks if Lizzie will publish anything. She tells him he will just have to wait and see.

Ellie and Emma come back from their trip, and Ellie sees something is wrong but Lizzie doesn’t want to talk in front of Emma. They tell her about their weekend and give her a surprise. A book that has articles from the West coast newspapers through the years.

lovebooks

Lizzie is estatic, and when she discovers that Emma was the one who decided to get it for her, it makes her realize that she may have judged Emma too harshly.

Lizzie is extremely upset and wants her best friend to spill to, but Ellie was going to have lunch with Edward. She doesn’t want to be around Edward as she feels stupid, and she gets horribly upset saying things she doesn’t mean. They both start yelling, and Lizzie leaves.

She heads down to the microfiche, as she has an idea on how to save the school. When she gets there she runs into Anne. Anne was hiding out as she is heartbroken over Rick. She decides to hitch on to Lizzie’s plan to save the school.

The next day at lunch, Lizzie stands up and gets everyone’s attention. Anne hands out pamphlets while Lizzie talks about her idea. She tells them how the school started when Anne’s great-great-great-great-great-grandmother couldn’t find a school that would allow her daughter on the premises. She goes on in her speech that change is good, letting boys in was a good change, BUT it would be bad to change the name and the morals and values that the school stands for. She then sends a petition around hoping for signatures.

We can do it

That day at the newsroom they dole out assignments and Georgiana asks her some questions. Georgiana’s “something secret” is really bothering Lizzie, so she takes her aside and asks her about it. Georgiana fell for a bad boy that was an old friend with Dante. He was really bad news. Dante got in some fights protecting the reputation of Georgiana. Long story short, Georgiana’s boyfriend cheated on her and dumped her, with Georgiana becoming depressed and throwing a hissy fit. They sent her to California, but Dante said that he had to go to. He didn’t want his sister to be without him, as he wanted to protect her.

What! Mark Wahlberg that's weird

Everything suddenly falls into place for Lizzie…why they bought the school…why he came. Dante’s parents did it so that Dante could go and protect his sister.

aw cry

Lizzie goes to work on her petition, asking Emma and Ellie for help. Lizzie and Ellie make up, with Lizzie no longer hating on Emma but including her in the group.

Friends-Best-Friends

They head out to their special tree; grabbing Anne along the way. The twosome is now a foursome.

The next day Lizzie is tooling about in the newspaper room and upset that there aren’t more interested in signing the petition. She decided to not print the owners names as she wants to respect Dante and Georgiana’s privacy, but that doesn’t mean she won’t send their parents special copies of the Gazette with hopes it will sway them.

She goes to see Bergie who tries to tempt her like Crowley into taking a deal that will seal her fate with Georgetown. Lizzie turns her done and heads off to her room.

No thank you

As she is heading back she runs into Dante, who asks her for a few minutes. He gives her a huge stack of papers with tons of signatures. He got everybody he knows to sign it, getting tons of signatures. He can’t guarantee that it will change his parents’ minds, but he wants to help. He also talked to Rick and told him he was wrong, but Rick is not ready to try again. Lizzie is shocked.

IDon'tevenknowhowtorespondGilmoreGirls

Why did you do this?

Pride&PrejudiceDarcy

And the two’s fighting is over.

Pride and prejudice kiss darcy elizabeth

The end does leave me with a few questions. If we had the Georgiana drama done before she came to the school why include a Josh Wickham? Is she going to have a repeat? Is Josh just a red herring? Why?

Now I know I had a few issues with the book, but on a whole it was actually very cute and I loved the idea of putting them all together as friends. I am looking forward to the rest of the series to see how she tells the other stories of the Jane Austen novels. I would recommend reading it at least once.

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For more retellings of Pride and Prejudice, go to An Assembly Such as This

For more modern retellings of Austen’s novels, go to Definitely Not Mr. Darcy

For more on Pride and Prejudice, go to The Ugly Truth

An Assembly Such as This

anassemblysuchasthis

So this book review is a part of that challenge I made for myself a year ago. The one in which I promised to review every book and film based on Pride and Prejudice book and movie. (For more on that go here.)

Pretty much

Too bad!

An Assembly Such as This (Fitzwilliam Darcy, Gentleman book #1), by Pamela Aidan, is a retelling of Pride and Prejudice…with a twist. In this version, we get the view of Pride and Prejudice from Darcy’s point of view.

Mr-DarcyexcuseMe

And I have to say I have never, ever been a fan of these fleshed out fan-fics, you know the one’s where people decide to put a new twist on a perfectly good story, but I must say I loved this.

Mr.Darcy Pride&Prejudice

Yep, I was not expecting to like this book, but I just loved it and didn’t want to put it down.

mr darcy

You see the reason that it was so good was first of all the author, Aidan, really paid close attention to Pride and Prejudice and made sure that her book stayed as close as possible to the novel. The book spans from the first assembly in which Darcy snubs Elizabeth and ends when he returns to London, taking Bingley in tow.

It really shows the progression of Darcy’s interests in Elizabeth, as we have that view into his brain.

Pride&PrejudiceMrDarcyEvolutionofDarcy'sviews

I also love how the author focuses a lot of time on Darcy and Georgina’s relationship. In Pride and Prejudice, you know he is a great older brother, but it is nice seeing much more of his care, attention, and affection.

But the main reasons why I loved this book…the Bingley and Darcy friendship.

Mr.DarcyMrBingleyPrideandPrejudicePracticewhattosay

In the original text, we know the two are close friends but all we really see is Mr. Darcy trying to take care of his friend, removing him from Jane and then encouraging him to come back. In Aidan’s book, we get to see the every day parts of friendship. The things they have in common, discussing issues they have with their families, their views on what’s popular at the time, etc. It’s nice to see that side if Darcy, as well as seeing that he isn’t always telling Bingley what to do.

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Yep, they are best friends, through and through.

If I had to pick out something that I didn’t like about this book, I would have to say my only issue is the stiffness in Darcy’s personal thoughts.

Mr-DarcyexcuseMe

In the book Pride and Prejudice, we are hardly ever in his head, so of course he is always stiff and proper, following the way people acted during that time. He only relaxes when we get to Pemberly, as that is his home and he feels comfortable there. However, Aidan always has him stiff and rigid. Even when he is talking to himself and thinking. I would have preferred him to be a bit more relaxed as it is in his private thoughts, but to be honest it is so minute, that it doesn’t really matter. All in all, it was a great book and I am looking forward to reading its sequel.

waitingforbookinseriesNosleepNeedanswers

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For more books based on Pride and Prejudice, go to Definitely Not Mr. Darcy

For more on Pride and Prejudice, go to The After Party

For more on Mr. Darcy, go to First Impressions

For more on my favorite books, go to Dreaming of the Sandman

For more of my favorite quotes, go to 25 More Films of Christmas

Dreaming of the Sandman

So I’ve developed a little crush on the Sandman

He’s awesome, but no not him.

Ew, no. Defintely NOT him.

No I’m talking about Neil Gaiman’s series The Sandman Chronicles.

SandmanChronichlesNeilGaimanmorpheusbymarak24-d45vh51

Yeah? Pretty good looking. So the series is really interesting. Gaiman actually melds together different things to create his stories. Christianity, Greek mythology, Shakespeare, fairy tales, Egyptian mythology, fantasy, science fiction, retelling of classic literature, etc. And what comes out of this is AMAZING.

love it

As my friend described it, you fall in love with Neil Gaiman’s brain, and his creation, Dream.

fallinloveBookBFliterryboyfriend

So Dream is one of the Endless, those who were in the beginning and will last until the last human dies. First there was his older sister Death, then his brother Destruction, Dream, the twins Despair and Desire, and lastly Delight who became Delirium.

At the beginning of the series, Dream has been captured by a man. The man was afraid of dying and had attempted to capture Death, but accidentally captures Dream. He traps him for years and causes his son to as well. Eventually, Dream escapes and find his kingdom and all the the dreaming places in ruin. He has to repair it along with dealing with the issues that were caused by his imprisonment.

It is really interesting as Dream’s story and his siblings are told in present day, along with flashbacks. You see how he was, but then how he has changed due to his imprisonment. And that’s not the only thing that is attractive about him.

He’s so eloquent. How he speaks, sigh. It is beautiful.

swoon dreamy

He himself is just so, sorry couldn’t help it, dreamy! He’s one of those tall, dark, handsome, broody types you all know I love and adore.

TallDarkBrooding

be-still-my-heart-gaston-o

Now let me warn you. I wouldn’t go farther than book 8. It just, well I don’t want to give anything away but his reigns ends.

Leave me alone so I can cry over the death of my fictional characters

Why! Why, Neil WHY!

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For more on Neil Gaiman, go to Love Stinks

For more on tall, dark, & brooding men; go to Simply Fantastic

For more of my favorite books, go to A Whole Lot of Fanfare

For more of my favorite quotes, go to A Sad and Lonely Place

For more of my favorite songs, go to O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

You’re Just Too Good Too Be True: 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Romantic Moment #9

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10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

So I love this film and I know that everyone is expecting the most romantic moment to be the end when Kat says the poem to Patrick. But as much as I love that moment it’s not my favorite.

So 10 Things I Hate About You is a modern day telling of the Taming of the Shrew by William Shakespeare. It is such a great movie starring the gorgeously adorable Heath Ledger, intense Julia Stiles, sweet lil’ Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and a young Gabrielle Union.

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So Cameron, (Joseph Gordon Levitt), is new in town and crazy for Bianca Stratford. The only problem is that Bianca can’t date, at least not until her older sister Kat does. Bianca wants to date stupid, jerky, cad Joey. (Joey just wants to sleep with her and dump her), but once again the problem is that Bianca can’t date until Kat does. NO ONE wants to date Kat, she’s CRAZY.

She is crazy!

She is crazy!

So Cameron decides that the only way he can get Bianca is if he can pay someone to date Kat. He has no money so he and his friend end up tricking Joey into paying someone to take her out. They choose Patrick Verona (Heath Ledger), as there are so many stories circulating about the crazy stuff he has done; they conclude he’s the only one tough enough to handle Kat.

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Patrick tries, but even with Cameron’s help, he’s not getting very far. He goes to different places and does different things to try to win her over, but she is just not having it.

pleasegoawayno

So Kat ends up going to this party and gets completely drunk after her and Bianca have a fight. Patrick takes care of her, and the two have some real tender moments, being vulnerable and sharing confidences. She comes onto Patrick, but Patrick doesn’t want to take advantage of her. He knows that she’s upset and drunk, and would regret everything the next day. That’s right guys, Patrick is a decent guy! Aw!!

Aw!

Aw!

Well the next day Kat is mad at him. She continues to be furious with him, hurt and embarrassed over her being rejected. Finally Patrick realizes that he has to do something silly and romantic to win her back.

Hmmm...

Hmmm…

Will the plans work to date the girls? Or will it blow up in all the boys’ faces?

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Most Romantic Moment: I Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You

So what Patrick decides to serenade Kat. Paying the A.V. team and the band to play Frankie Valli’s “Can’t Take My Eyes off of You“! 😀

So romantic

So romantic

And he doesn’t just sing to her, he sings to her in front of the whole school and pays the marching band to accompany him. This is SO ROMANTIC! I aboslutely LOVE this part.

He has such a great voice, and that smile is to die for. Not only does he sing and dance, but fights off the security guards so he can continue. He’s so sweet and romantic. 😀

Aw!

Aw!

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To start Romance is in the Air from the beginning, go to Boom Box of Love: Say Anything (1989)

For the previous post, go to We’re Buying This Dress: Runaway Bride (1999)

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For more Heath Ledger, go to The Story, We’re Living it. It’s Alive: The Brothers Grimm (2005)

For more Frankie Valli, go to Oh What A Night

For more serenading, go to I Wanna Grow Old With You: The Wedding Singer (1998)

For more modern retellings, go to Dracula. Not Myth, Nor Ravings of a Mad Irish Novelist, Oh No, He’s Real: Dracula 2000 (2000)