The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club: Ham, Cheddar, and Apple Tea Sandwiches

So every Wednesday, starting in October, I have been a part of a Tea Party/Bible Study/Book Club on The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis. This is different from my book club and the Book Club Picks I have been reviewing (and desperately need to catch up on). I also need to catch up on these recipes. Week three we had Organic India Tulsi Masala Chai Tea, Parmesan and Chive Scones, Cucumber Aioli Canapés, Ham and Green Apple Sandwiches, Cranberry and Brie Bites, and Mini Pumpkin Creme Brulee.

I couldn’t share the recipes in October as I was in the middle of Horrorfest IX, so I am catching up and of course next is sandwiches.

Tea first!

This comes from Tea Time Magazine’s Teatime Celebrations. I couldn’t find my cutter, and instead used my knife and cut the sandwiches into triangles instead.

Emma (1996)

Ingredients:

  • 6 Slices of Pumpernickel-Rye Swirl (I couldn’t find any and instead used a light rye bread), frozen
  • 1 Tart Apple, such as Granny Smith
  • 2 Tablespoons of Mayonnaise
  • 2 Tablespoons of Spicy Brown Mustard
  • 6 Slices of Thin Deli-Style Smoked Ham
  • 6 Slices of Sharp White Cheddar Cheese
  • 1/3 Cup of Baby Arugula ( I substituted with Baby Spinach)

Directions for Sandwiches:

  1. Using a 2-inch square cutter, cut 12 shapes from frozen bread, discarding crusts.
  2. Cover with damp paper towels, and let bread thaw (about 15 mins).
  3. Core apple, but leave whole and unpeeled.
  4. Cut 6 (1/4-inch) crossway slices from apple. Set aside.
  5. In a small bowl, combine mayonnaise and mustard, stirring well.
  6. Spread mayonnaise mixture in an even layer on each bread square.
  7. Using 6 bread squares (mayonnaise side up) as a base.
  8. Assemble 6 sandwiches, stacking ingredients in the following order: arugula/spinach, ham slice (folded into quarters), cheese slice, apple slice, and another bread square (mayonnaise side down).
  9. Garnish each tea sandwiches with arugula or spinach leaves, if desired.

These were delicious and a wonderful addition to the night’s tea.

For more from The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club, go to Cucumber Aioli Canapés

For more recipes, go to Parmesan and Chive Scones

For more Tea Time Magazine Recipes, go to Heirloom Tomato Tart

For more sandwich recipes, go to Turkey-Apple Tea Sandwiches

For more ham sandwich recipes, go to Tea Time Magazine’s Ham and Cheese Tea Sandwiches

For more tea posts, go to How to Clean Your Tea Infusers

 

 

The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club: Cucumber Aioli Canapés

So every Wednesday, starting in October, I have been a part of a Tea Party/Bible Study/Book Club on The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis. This is different from my book club and the Book Club Picks I have been reviewing (and desperately need to catch up on). I also need to catch up on these recipes. Week three we had Organic India Tulsi Masala Chai Tea, Parmesan and Chive Scones, Cucumber Aioli Canapés, Ham & Apple Sandwiches, Cranberry and Brie Bites, and Mini Pumpkin Creme Brulee.

I couldn’t share the recipes in October as I was in the middle of Horrorfest IX, so I am catching up and of course next is sandwiches.

This comes from Teatime Celebrations magazine. The recipe did call for alfalfa sprouts but I forgot them, but I did have leftover parsley and threw that on top.

Ingredients Lemon-Pepper Aioli:

  • 1/4 Cup of Mayonnaise
  • 1/2 Teaspoon of Fresh Lemon Zest
  • 1/8 Teaspoon of Ground Black Pepper

Directions:

  1. In a small bowl, combine mayonnaise, lemon zest, and pepper-stirring well.
  2. Use immediately, or cover and refrigerate for up to a day.

Ingredients Sandwiches:

  • 3 Large Slices of Firm White Sandwich Bread, Frozen
  • 1 English Cucumber
  • Lemon-Pepper Aioli
  • Parsley

Directions:

  1. Using a 2-inch cutter, cut 12 shapes out of the 3 slices of frozen bread. Discard scraps.
  2. Place bread in resealable bag and let thaw.
  3. Spread the aioli onto each bread square.
  4. Using a mandolin or sharp paring knife, cut 60 paper-thin slices from the cucumber.
  5. Place 5 cucumber slices on each bread square, overlapping each circle.
  6. Serve immediately.

These were good but not as good as the Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés.  But that’s okay, I like trying out recipes and trying to find the perfect cucumber sandwich.

For more from The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club, go to Parmesan and Chive Scones

For more recipes, go to Heirloom Tomato Tart

For more Tea Time Magazine Recipes, go to Lemon Gingerbread Cake

For more sandwich recipes, go to Turkey-Apple Tea Sandwiches

For more cucumber sandwich recipes, go to Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés

For more tea posts, go to Fotina Flower Puffed Pastry

The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club: Turkey-Apple Tea Sandwiches

So every Wednesday, starting in October, I have been a part of a Tea Party/Bible Study/Book Club on The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis. This is different from my book club and the Book Club Picks I have been reviewing (and desperately need to catch up on). I also need to catch up on these recipes, week two was Chami Spice Ginger Plum Tea, Dark Chocolate Ginger Scones, Curried Egg Salad Triple Stacks Sandwiches, Turkey-Apple Tea Sandwiches, Fotina Flower Pastry, and Lemon Gingerbread Cake.

I couldn’t share the recipes in October as I was in the middle of Horrorfest IX, so I am catching up and of course after sandwich number one, we have sandwich number two.

YUM!

This comes from Tea Time Magazine. 

Turkey-Apple Tea Sandwiches Ingredients:

  • 4 Slices Honey Wheat Bread
  • 8 Slices of Smoked Turkey
  • 1 Red Apple
  • 1 Recipe Cranberry Spread
  • 8 Leaves of Baby Spinach

Directions:

  1. Using a serrated knife, cut and discard crusts from bread slices, creating a perfect 3-inch square.
  2. Cut each square diagonally into 4 triangles.
  3. Cover bread with damp paper towels to prevent drying out while preparing other ingredients.
  4. Using a sharp chef’s knife, cut 8 triangles the same size as the bread triangles from turkey.
  5. Using a sharp chef’s knife, cut 8 very thin vertical slices from the apple.
  6. Spread a layer of the cranberry spread onto each bread triangle.
  7. On the cranberry side of 8 bread triangles layer a spinach leaf, a turkey slice, and an apple slice.
  8. Top each with a remaining bread triangle, cranberry side down.
  9. Serve immediately, or cover with damp paper towels, place in a covered container, and refrigerate for a few hours until ready to serve.

Cranberry Spread Ingredients:

  • 1/3 Cup of Mayonnaise
  • 3 Tablespoons of Jellied Cranberry Sauce with Cranberries
  • 1 Tablespoon of Yellow Mustard
  • 1/8 Teaspoon of Salt
  • 1/8 Teaspoon of Ground Black Pepper

Directions:

  1. In a small bowl, combine mayonnaise, cranberry sauce, mustard, salt, and pepper.
  2. Whisk well.

These were delicious sandwiches and a perfect fall time tea savory.

For more from The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club, go to Curried Egg Salad Triple Stacks Sandwiches

For more recipes, go to Dark Chocolate Ginger Scones

For more Tea Time Magazine Recipes, go to Tea Time Magazine’s Ham and Cheese Tea Sandwiches

For more sandwiches, go to Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés

For more tea posts, go to Mini Apple Pies

The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club: Curried Egg Salad Triple Stacks Sandwiches

So every Wednesday, starting in October, I have been a part of a Tea Party/Bible Study/Book Club on The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis. This is different from my book club and the Book Club Picks I have been reviewing (and desperately need to catch up on). I also need to catch up on these recipes, week two was Chami Spice Ginger Plum Tea, Dark Chocolate Ginger Scones, Curried Egg Salad Triple Stacks Sandwiches, Turkey Apple Sandwiches, Fotina Flower Pastry, and Lemon Gingerbread Cake.

I couldn’t share the recipes in October as I was in the middle of Horrorfest IX, so I am catching up and of course after scones comes sandwich number one.

This comes from Tea Time Magazine. 

Emma (1996)

Ingredients:

  • 6 Large Hardboiled Eggs
  • 1/3 Cup of Mayonnaise
  • 1/2 Cup of Finely Chopped Celery
  • 2 Tablespoons of Chopped Green Onion Tops
  • 1 Tablespoon of Yellow Mustard
  • 1/2 Teaspoon of Curry Powder
  • 1/4 Teaspoon of Salt
  • 1/8 Teaspoon of Ground Black Pepper
  • 9 Slices of very thin Wheat Bread

Directions:

  1. In a medium bowl and using a pastry blender, finely chop eggs.
  2. Add mayonnaise, celery, onion, mustard, curry powder, salt, and pepper; stir until thoroughly combined.
  3. Place egg salad in a covered container, and refrigerate until cold, about 4 hours.
  4. Spread 3 tablespoons egg salad onto 6 bread slices.
  5. With egg salad sides up, stack 2 of the 6 slices, and top with a plain bread slice.
  6. Repeat with remaining bread slices to create 3 triple-stack sandwiches.
  7. Using a serrated bread knife, trim and discard crusts from all sides of sandwiches.
  8. Cut each sandwich into 3 finger sandwiches.
  9. Serve immediately, or cover with damp paper towels, place in a covered container and refrigerate for a few hours until ready to serve.

Now I am not a big fan of curry, I am really sensitive to scents and the intensity of curry doesn’t appeal to me. These however were absolutely delicious! I could not stop gobbling them up!

For more from The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club, go to Dark Chocolate Ginger Scones

For more recipes, go to Mini Apple Pies

For more Tea Time Magazine Recipes, go to Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés

For more sandwiches, go to Tea Time Magazine’s Ham and Cheese Tea Sandwiches

For more tea posts, go to Tea Time Magazine’s Ham and Cheese Tea Sandwiches

The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club: Tea Time Magazine’s Ham and Cheese Tea Sandwiches

So every Wednesday, starting in October, I have been a part of a Tea Party/Bible Study/Book Club on The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis. This is different from my book club and the Book Club Picks I have been reviewing (and desperately need to catch up on). The first week we had Cederberg Tea Company Rooibos + Ginger Tea, Cranberry-Spice Scones with Maple Cream, Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés, Ham and Cheese Tea Sandwiches, Fotina & Pork Puffed Pastry, and Mini Apple Pies.

I couldn’t share the recipes in October as I was in the middle of Horrorfst IX, so I will be starting now-and as I started with scones, I’m moving on to sandwiches.

And eat sandwiches!

This recipe comes from Tea Time Magazine Annual British Issue.

Ingredients:

  • 1/3 Pound of English Cheddar Cheese
  • 1/4 Cup of Mayonnaise
  • 2 Tablespoons of English Mustard
  • 8 Slices of Firm Honey Wheat Bread
  • 8 Large Slices of Deli-Style Ham

Directions:

  • Using a cheese slicer, cut very thin slices of cheese horizontally from a cheese block (I picked up cheese from the deli so it was already sliced thin.)
  • In a small bowl combine mustard and mayonnaise, mix well.
  • Spread a layer of mayonnaise mixture onto 8 slices of bread.
  • Arrange 2 ham slices on 4 bread slices.
  • Place cheese slices over the ham and top with remaining bread slices, spread side down, to make 4 sandwiches.
  • Using a serrated bread knife in a gentle sawing motion, trim and discard crusts from each sandwich to create 4.5×2.5-inch rectangles.
  • Cut each sandwich into 3 (2.5×1.5-inch rectangles).
  • Serve immediately, or cover with damp paper towels, place in a covered container, and refrigerate up to 2 hours before serving.

So my sandwiches didn’t come out quite right, I don’t think I cut the bread as thick as it should have been, as they kept toppling over.

I’ve noticed that a lot of these English recipes want you to use mustard and mayonnaise, not my favorite condiments. I usually half the amounts as that is more to my taste.

Otherwise they were pretty good and very easy to make.

For more from The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club, go to Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés

For more recipes, go to Cranberry-Spice Scones with Maple Cream

For more sandwiches, go to Cucumber Sandwiches

For more tea posts, go to Mug o’ Tea Treats Christmas Gift

The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club: Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés

So every Wednesday, starting in October, I have been a part of a Tea Party/Bible Study/Book Club on The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis. This is different from my book club and the Book Club Picks I have been reviewing (and desperately need to catch up on). The first week we had Cederberg Tea Company Rooibos + Ginger Tea, Cranberry-Spice Scones with Maple Cream, Ham and Cheese Sandwiches, Cucumber-Four Peppercorn Goat Cheese Canapés, Fotina & Pork Puffed Pastry, and Mini Apple Pies.

I couldn’t share the recipes in October as I was in the middle of Horrorfst IX, so I will be starting now-and as I started with scones, I’m moving on to sandwiches.

Party time!

So this recipe comes from Tea Time Magazine Annual British Issue, and was originally called Cucumber-Blue Cheese Canapés, but I don’t like blue cheese. I think it is extremely gross.

So when I was browsing for a goat cheese substitute I spotted Laura Chenel’s Chèvre Four Peppercorn Fresh Goat Cheese Chabis and boy let me tell you, that cheese is absolutely delicious. So if you want the original recipe, you’ll have to buy the July/August 2020 issue as the recipe isn’t online.

Ingredients:

  • 4 Slices of firm White Sandwich Bread
  • 3 Tablespoons of Mayonnaise
  • 1 Teaspoon of Laura Chenel’s Chèvre Four Peppercorn Fresh Goat Cheese ( I used way more as I love cheese)
  • 1/2 Teaspoon of Chopped Parsley
  • 1/2 English Cucumber
  • Garnish: Parsley Leaves

Directions:

  1. Using a serrated bread knife in a gentle sawing motion, trim and discard crusts from bread slices. Cut bread into 8 2.5×1.5 inch rectangles.
  2. In a small bowl, stir together mayonnaise, cheese, and parsley until combined.
  3. Spread a layer of the mixture onto the bread rectangles. Add more cheese to your desired taste.
  4. Using a sharp knife, cut a cucumber in half lengthwise. Using a mandoline, cut 32 very thin lengthwise slices from cucumber halves. I actually did half and half as I love the cucumber cut into circles.
  5. Arrange 4 cucumber slices width-wise in a shingled, parallel fashion on the mayonnaise side of the each bread rectangle, trimming cucumber slices to fit the bread rectangle.
  6. Garnish each canapé with a parsley leaf, if desired.
  7. Serve immediately, or cover with damp paper towels, place in a covered container, and refrigerate for up to an hour before serving.

These were soooo good. I loved the mix of the four peppercorn cheese with the cucumbers. In fact I used the leftovers to make sandwiches the next few days and it was fantastic. This is a wonderful addition to any tea party.

It was delicious, just as I planned.

For more from The Magician’s Nephew Tea Party/Book Club, go to Cranberry-Spice Scones with Maple Cream

For more recipes, go to Brown Sugar and Cream Cheese Scones

For more cucumber sandwiches, go to Cucumber Sandwiches

For more sandwich recipes, go to Basic Chicken Salad

For more tea posts, go to Mug o’ Tea Treats Christmas Gift

Cucumber Sandwiches

So last month my friends and I were supposed to meet up for high tea, as this is something we have been trying to do about every three months to stay connected as it is seems to get harder the older you get.

We had the date and reservations at this amazing historic tea place, but then COVID-19 happened.

So we decided to do our own tea party, a virtual tea party.

We each set up a space with snacks and tea, I drank Earl Grey Tea of course.

I decided to make a new type of Cucumber Sandwiches and Earl Grey Tea Cookies. Both of which were extremely delicious, and I decided to share them with you here, starting with the cucumber sandwiches, which originally come from Spend With Pennies.

Ingredients:

  • 8 oz Cream Cheese
  • 3 Tablespoons of Mayonnaise
  • 2 Teaspoons of Chopped Fresh Dill
  • 1 Teaspoon of Chopped Fresh Chives
  • 1/4 Teaspoon of Garlic Powder
  • Salt
  • Pepper
  • 1 Long English Cucumber, Thinly Sliced
  • 1 Loaf of Bread, Crusts Removed

Directions:

  1. Mix cream cheese and mayonnaise in a small bowl with a hand mixer, until smooth.
  2. Stir in herbs, garlic powder, salt, and pepper.
  3. Cut crusts off bread slices.
  4. Spread bread slices with cream cheese mixture.
  5. Thinly slice cucumbers, layer over half of the bread slices.
  6. Top with additional herbs, if desired.
  7. Top with remaining bread slice and cut each sandwich into three pieces.

These were delicious! I’m glad I was the only one eating them as I wanted to eat them all!

 

For more recipes, go to Lemon Curd

For more tea sandwich recipes, go to Basic Chicken Salad

For more tea party recipes, go to Scottish Oat Scones

Basic Chicken Salad

So let’s talk about tea time. We’ve had scones and cookies, we need some sandwiches!

I love chicken salad, and here is a basic recipe. I’ll do a Waldorf Chicken Salad in the future. I got this recipe from my sister blog MysteriousEats.wordpress.com

Ingredients:

  • 1.5 Cups of Cooked Chicken (I like using the rotisserie chicken)
  • 1/2 Cup of Chopped Celery
  • 1/3 Cup of Chopped Onion
  • 1/2 Cup of Mayonnaise
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  • Bread

Directions:

  1. Toast bread.
  2. Combine all ingredients in a bowl.
  3. Spread the chicken salad on the toasted bread.

Delicious

A great addition to any one’s tea time.

Ready for high tea!

For more recipes, go to London Fog Smoothie

For more salad recipes, go to Triple Berry Salad

For more from MysteriousEats, go to London Fog Fauxccino

What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?: Scream (1996)

So this Horrorfest, I am going to be doing something a little different. We are going to have “Screamtastic Saturdays”. Every Saturday in October going to be on a different Scream movie. So let’s kick it off with:

scream1

What’s your favorite scary movie?

*Spolier Alert*

So I really loved this movie. I have to say that Wes Craven as one of the horror kings totally tanked on Nightmare on Elm Street. This was by far, much better. One of the coolest things about this film is that it is a parody of horror films, while still being its own horror film.

So the beginning starts off with Drew Barrymore cooking popcorn and preparing for a fun night in watching scary movies with her boyfriend. Just like When A Stranger Calls, she receives a strange phone call and is at first into it, thinking it is just a joke.

scary movie mansfield park Scream

 

However, it slowly turns as the caller threatens Casey that he is going to kill her and her boyfriend.

Scream-Casey-Becker-drew-barrymore-31896958-2560-1088

But she has a chance at being saved, all she has to do is answer who was the killer in Friday the 13th.

“Phone Voice: Name the killer in Friday the 13th.

Casey: Jason! Jason! Jason!

Phone Voice: I’m sorry. That’s the wrong answer!

Casey: No, it’s not. No it’s not. It was Jason.

Phone Voice: Afraid not. No way.

Casey: Listen, it was Jason! I saw that movie 20 g******* times!

Phone Voice: Then you should know that Jason’s mother, Mrs. Voorhees was the original killer. Jason didn’t show up until the sequel. I’m afraid that was a wrong answer.

Casey: [Weeping] You tricked me.

Phone Voice: Lucky for you there’s a bonus round, but poor Steve… I’m afraid he’s OUT!”

So Steve is murdered and Casey runs throughout the house trying to get away from the killer. Of which she doesn’t make it out and finds herself victim #1.

victim

And thus the body count begins…

So the killing of Drew Barrymore holds two significant things. One, she was one the most famous actress in the film, and was killed first. This was supposed to be a homage to Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho (1960), in which the most famous actress of the film, Janet Leigh, was only in the movie for a short while before she was killed. This was also supposed to be a parody of Craven’s film Nightmare on Elm Street, when the first character we meet, Tina (played by Amanda Wyss),is killed. Craven also had his character Casey wear white just like Tina in Nightmare on Elm Street.

The next day, the town Woodsboro is just ravanged by reporters who are eager to find out more about this murder, especially since it occurred almost exactly a year after their little town experienced a murder just as gruesome. The murder of Maureen Prescott by Cotton Weary.

Meanwhile, Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell) is trying to cope with everything that is going on.

Scream

She is having a really hard time with the anniversary of her mother’s death. When she hears about the murders and sees the reporters it brings the mess of the past year back to her. The memories just come flooding back.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

One of her other big issues is her boyfriend Billy Loomis.

Billy-From-Scream-scream-1804906-547-342

 

Okay, I just have to go off on a tangent here: Billy is sooooooooooooo creepy looking. When I first saw this I was like he is toooootally the killer. I mean LOOK AT HIM! He has killer written alllll over him. Those eyes, they are super frigtening. And the way he talks? He tells Sidney that he was watching Silence of the Lambs and that made him think of her and want to come over and get funky. What a freak!

Certified Creepo Ribbon

IDon'tTrustHimGreatGatsby

(BTW it is another Psycho reference. Billy Loomis is a homage to Sam Loomis, Marion Crane’s boyfriend in Psycho; and Dr. Sam Loomis in Halloween.)

Anyways, so the two have been having issues since Sidney’s mom died. She was so traumatized by the event that she has isolated herself and found it hard to let anyone in again. Her best friend Tatum is cool with it as she understands she needs time to grieve, but Billy has been having a hard time backtracking from third base to the benches. Ladies, let me just say that if any guy ever tries to pressure into having sex when you aren’t ready, junk punch him and run away. You don’t need that loser in your life.

That day her father has to go out of town, leaving Sidney all alone in a big house.

Yep, gonna make references all night.

Yep, gonna make When a Stranger Calls  references all night.

She makes plans to meet up with Tatum and stay at her place, but falls asleep. Tatum is late picking her up as her cheerleading practice went way over. While Sidney is waiting she gets a phone call from the killer who starts harassing her. And she stupidly calls throughout the house trying to find him.

Killer Scary Movie

“Sidney Prescott: Can you see me right now?  Ah, okay. [puts a finger in her nose] What am I doing? Huh? Huh? What am I doing? Hello? [takes finger out] Nice try, Randy. Tell Tatum to hurry up, okay? Bye now.

Ghostface: IF YOU HANG UP ON ME, YOU’LL DIE JUST LIKE YOUR MOTHER! Do you want to die, Sidney? Your mother sure didn’t.

Sidney Prescott: F*** you, you cretin!”

Soon the killer comes in her house and she has to run away from him and try to get the police there. Billy shows up, climbing through her window. Sidney sees that he has a cellphone and freaks out, having the police cart him away.

Gilmore girls creep

So there are a couple places that were filmed in Santa Rosa, CA. One was the bathroom scene in which Sidney is attacked, the other is Tatum’s house which is right across the street from the house used in Pollyanna (1960). It is also across the street from the house used in Alfred Hitchcock’s Shadow of a Doubt (1943). The house in the opening scene was next door to the house used in Cujo (1983).

Sidney spends the night at Tatum’s house and the next day is completely crazy. Billy was released as they had nothing to hold him. And they still are unable to find her father as he never checked into his hotel. Plus Gale Weathers, a reporter who has been harassing her for a year,  and all the other reporters are driving her crazy!

“Gale: There she is! Sidney, hi, what happened? Are you alright?

Tatum: She’s not answering any questions alright. Just leave us alone.

Sidney Prescott: No, no Tatum it’s OK. She’s just doing her job, right Gale?

Gale: That’s right.

Sidney Prescott: So how’s the book?

Gale: Oh it’ll be out later this year.

Sidney Prescott: Oh, I’ll look for it.

Gale: I’ll send you a copy.

[Sidney turns around a punches Gale in the face]”

Scream-Punch

Also at the school we have a little Wes Craven easter egg, as he dresses up as a janitor in a Freddy Krueger sweater.

So the principal decides to suspend school until further notice as it is just too risky for the students. After they all have left, he finds himself joining the body count as well, victim #2.

victim

The death of the principal was actually added to the film late into production. Bob Weinstein noticed there were 30 pgs in the script were nobody died and they decided that they needed another victim.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Billy’s friend Stu decides to throw a party and have all the kids in school come. I don’t understand why anyone’s parents would allow their kids to go out like that with A FREAKIN’ KILLER ON THE LOOSE. Come on people, Parent!!

hmm_yes_i_see_youre_a_moron_trollcat

At the party, the kids are chillin’, drinking beer, watching horror films, etc. Billy and Sidney go upstairs and talk, resulting in the two having sex.

Meanwhile downstairs everyone is chillin’ while Tatum goes off to the garage to get more beer. The scene in the garage is the only weak link in the film. First of all when Tatum walks over to the garage door and it almost closes on her, that would never happen. My dad is a contractor and I remeber when I was a kid I thought the garage would close on me too. However, they design garage doors specfically to not do that. In fact they have a certain radius that if someone was to walk within that radius the door would stop. And come on she IS IN A FREAKIN’ GARAGE!!! Do you know how many weapons there are in that thing? She passes over a hoe, rake, and a shovel! You see all kinds of tools throughout their fight too. She could easly find something to attack him and win. Although I do have to give props to Wes for allowing Tatum to to put up such a great fight.

Victim #3

Victim #3

Back in the living room,  Randy is giving a rundown on how to survive a horror film,  (* are the rules that are given by the killer).

  1. You will not survive if you have sex
  2. You will not survive if you do drugs or drinks
  3. You will not survive if you say “I’ll be right back.”
  4. Everyone is a suspect
  5. *You will not survive if you ask “Who’s there.”*
  6. *You will not survive if you go out to investigate a strange noise*

While all this is going on, Gale and Tatum’s brother Officer Dewey, have been spying on the party. Gale has snuck a camera into the party, so that she can view everything from her van. She and Dewey both take a break though, “walking off” together where they come upon Sidney’s father’s abandoned car.

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

Everyone back at the party gets the news that the principal is dead and had been strung up on the football field. Almost everyone leaves; with just Randy, Sidney, Billy, Stu, and Gale’s cameraman Kenny (in the van) staying behind .The killer comes out and starts attacking.

ghostface_scream

One of the best scenes is the scene where a drunk Randy is telling Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween to turn around while the killer is behind him. He constantly repeats, “Jamie, turn around. Turn around, Jamie!” as the killer is slowly creeping up behind him. The actor who plays Randy is also named Jamie (Jamie Kennedy) and the killer was currently behind him. This is also the only scene in which the  killer is actually one of the actors. Skeet Ulrich had asked specifically if he could wear the costume for one scene.

So Kenny and Dewey fall victim to his knife.

Victim #8

Victim #4&5

After Sidney and Billy are done having sex and have placed their clothes back on the killer charges in and stabs Billy. Sidney manages to run away and finds Tatum’s body.

As she continues running away she ends up getting in the way of Gale who was fleeing the killer from her van. Gale swerves to miss Sidney and crashes, getting knocked out. Sidney goes back to the house, taking the gun from the dying Dewey. She runs into Randy and Stu and is unsure who is the killer. She then runs into a wounded Billy and gives him the gun. Billy immediately shoots Randy and stands up.

Say What

Yep, Billy isn’t injured at all. In fact, it was all a ploy he is the real killer.

dun-dun-duuuun

Corn Syrup

Billy: Corn Syrup, just like in the real movies.

Yep, the whole time Billy and Stu have been the killers. From Sidney’s mom to everyone else.

“Sidney Prescott: Why? Why did you kill my mother?

Billy: Why? WHY! You hear that Stu? I think she wants a motive. Well I don’t really believe in motives Sid, I mean did Norman Bates have a motive?

Stu: No.

Billy: Did we ever find out why Hannibal Lecter like to eat people? DON’T THINK SO! See it’s a lot more scarier when there’s no motive, Sid. We did your Mom a favor, Sid. That woman was a slut-bag whore who flashed her s*** all over town like she was Sharon Stone or somethin’.

Stu: Yeah, we put her out of her misery, ’cause let’s face Sidney, your mother was no Sharon Stone,hmm?

Billy: Is that motive enough for you? How about this? Your slut mother was f****** my father and she’s the reason my mom moved out and abandoned me. [Sid looks astonished] How’s that for a motive? Maternal abandonment causes serious deviant behaviour. It certainly f***** you up. It made you have sex with a psychopath.”

Yep, and not only that the planned the whole thing out so that her father would take the blame, make it look like he had a mental breakdown on the anniversary of his wife’s death and started killing people. They had kidnapped him and bring him out for their final act. Billy and Stu planned that attack on Sidney to make any second arrest look false and questionable.

you're evil

Of course their plan will not be complete until they make themselves look like victims. Stu stabs Billy, and Billy stabs Stu. While the two are monologing and arguing they have seemed to forget one important thing.

 Sidney and her father have disappeared.

“Stu: S***…

Billy: What?

Stu: Oh, s***.

Billy: [They go into the kitchen to find Sidney and Mr. Prescott gone] Where are they? Where are they?

Stu: I don’t know, Billy, but I’m hurtin’, man!

Yep, just like they say in Dial M for Murder (1954), you can never plan the perfect murder. What sounds good on paper can never transfer to real life, because in real life there are just too many things that can go wrong.

“Margot Mary Wendice: Do you really believe in the perfect murder?

Mark Halliday: Mmm, yes, absolutely. On paper, that is. And I think I could, uh, plan one better than most people; but I doubt if I could carry it out.

Tony Wendice: Oh? Why not?

Mark Halliday: Well, because in stories things usually turn out the way the author wants them to; and in real life they don’t… always.”

So here Stu and Billy find themselves completely off script, and unsure…

[the phone rings]

Stu: Should I let the machine get it?

Billy: [answers it] Hello?

Sidney Prescott: Are you alone in the house?

Billy: B****! You b****, where the f*** are you?

Sidney Prescott: Not so fast, we’re going to play a little game. It’s called: Guess who just called the police and reported your sorry motherf******* a**!

[Stu is slowly collapsing to the floor]

Billy: Find her, you dips***! Get up!

Stu: I can’t, Billy. You already cut me too deep. I think I’m dying here, man!

Billy: [Billy gives Stu the phone] Talk to her. Talk to her.

Stu: Hello?

Sidney Prescott: Ah, Stu, Stu, Stu… What’s your motive? Billy’s got one. The police are on their way. What are you going to tell them?

Stu: Peer pressure. I’m far too sensitive.

Billy:[Billy takes the phone back] I’m going to rip you up, b****, just like your f****** mother!

Sidney Prescott: You’ve gotta find me first, you pansy-a** momma’s boy!”

Now the game of cat and mouse has changed with the hunted becoming the hunters.

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In the end Gale, Sidney, Dewey, Mr. Prescott, and Randy survive.

So that was Scream one of the best horror-parodies ever made. For more fun check out Scream in 30 sec with bunnies. And How It Should Have Ended

This film really brought back the slasher genre, as after this slasher remakes and slasher film numbers escalated. It also brought up the debate on whether or not violence in movies affected people and caused them to become more violent? The most important thing is that this film increased the use of caller ID and made such phone harassment much harder. Although not for me.

The other thing I realized in this film is that I am soooooo Randy.

Randy

I also realized that just like The Cable Guy, I’m only a few steps away from the crazy.

screamBilly

Well, that’s Scream. Tune in next Saturday for Scream 2.

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

To go to the previous post, go to In Their Proper Place

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For more on Scream, go to When Horror Doesn’t Stay on the Screen

For more on Wes Craven, go to Krueger Town

For more on phone harrasment, go to It’s Coming From Inside the House

For more films influenced by Alfred Hitchcock, go to Everyone’s Entitled to One Good Scare

For more on serial killers, go to Hello? Is There a Killer in My Kitchen?

For more on slasher films, go to Camp Blood

For more films that spanned numerous sequels, go to He Who Walks Behind the Rows

Food, Food, Food!

Let’s talk about food.

I'mahobbit

It’s like I’m a hobbit or something

2ndBreakfast Lord of the Rings

And of course after I eat I feel like a fatty

hungry

Like every time

don't eat

But how can I when food is so good!???!

BonesSweetsLoveChocolate

Yeah…so

Lovefood

But you know what? Food is always there for you:

friendshurtFoodDoesn't

So you know what, I’ve decided to give up the fight.

Fridge

I’m gonna just enjoy those fatty foods

extrafries

How could I live without fries? You can’t

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And Nachos:

Nachos

Pizza:

I love Pizza

I love Pizza

Cheese:

parmesanCheesetoomuch

Pie:

PieTwinPeaks

Cookies?

cookies

Yep:

AnAffairtoRememberillegalimmoralfatteningthingswelovemost

But you know what:

Large-Portion-of-Pasta-with-Meatballs-510xl339

I agree

julia child

Thank you Julia for approving of my life choices. After all

MentalistDeadIcecream

And BTW:

curvy

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I want to end this post honoring those who died on 9/11. Thank you to those who helped out in the aftermath, and an even greater thank you to those who gave their lives. We owe a debt to you and your families that we can never repay.

“That I’m proud to be an American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.”

-God Bless the U.S.A.

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For more on Lord of the Rings, go to Lord of the Cats

For more on Lydia Bennet, go to How to Catch a Man

For more on Sabrina the Teenage Witch, go to Pizza Power

For more on Mean Girls, go to Just Can’t Get a Break

For more on Jim Davis, go to For All the Men Who Wonder What It’s Like

For more on Friends (TV Show), go to I Will Survive

For more on Joey Tribbiani, go to I Don’t Wanna Be in Love (Dance Floor Anthem)

For more of my favorite quotes, go to Here I Go