They’re Coming for Me Now…And Then They’ll Come for You: House on Haunted Hill (1959)

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The ghosts are moving tonight, restless… hungry…In just a moment I’ll show you the only really haunted house in the world.

I have been trying to review this film since the first Horrorfest, but something always seems to gum up the works. This is one of my all time favorite horror films and my favorite Vincent Price film.

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Years ago I was at a yard sale, where I found this film, along with: Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956), The Wolf Man (1941), The Stepford Wives (1975), Rebecca (1940), The Phantom of the Opera (1943), North by Northwest (1959), Family Plot (1976), Lifeboat (1944), The Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954), Notorious (1946), and The Night of the Hunter (1955).  

I had never heard of this film, but if it has Vincent Price you know I’m all over it.

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Then I watched it and saw it is one of the best horror films ever made, with everything you could want:

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So do you dare continue on?

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So the film starts off with the scariest opening I have ever seen. All we have is a black screen and screaming from men and women.

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Can you imagine hearing that full volume in a darken theater?

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I can imagine people were freaking out.

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We then are met by Watson Pritchard (Elisha Cook Jr.) who warns us about the house and how we should stay away:

Watson Pritchard:The ghosts are moving tonight, restless… hungry. May I introduce myself? I’m Watson Pritchard. In just a moment I’ll show you the only really haunted house in the world. Since it was built a century ago, seven people, including my brother, have been murdered in it. Since then, I’ve owned the house. I only spent one night then and when they found me in the morning, I… I was almost dead.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We then cut to wealthy businessman Fredrick Loren (Vincent Price). He has rented the House on Haunted Hill for a party,

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inviting five people to attend and promising them each $10,000 if they stay the whole night.

As soon as they pull up to the house, strange things begin happening. A chandelier almost kills a guest when it falls,

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And another guest gets knocked unconscious,

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And it doesn’t stop there. It turns out that all is not happy with the Loren life. Fredrick is angry with his wife as he believes her to be a gold digger and trying to murder him.

Frederick Loren: Do you remember the fun we had when you poisoned me?

Annabelle Loren: [laughs] Something you ate, the doctor said.

Frederick Loren: Yes, arsenic on the rocks…[grabs AnnabelleAnnabelle, you’d do it again if you thought you’d get away with it, wouldn’t you?

But Annabelle (Carole Ohmart) says that he is a jealous, crazy psychopath who has already killed three wives and is going to add her to his dead list.

Annabelle Loren: My husband is sometimes insane with jealousy. Nothing matters to him!

Lance Schroeder: Would he hurt you?

Annabelle Loren: He would kill me if he could…You know, of course, that I’m his fourth wife. The first simply disappeared; the other two died…All his doctors said heart attacks. Two girls in their 20s. Lance… I don’t want to join them.

Who is telling the truth? Who is lying? And which is a killer?

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We are given the history of the house with its gruesome murders, from beheadings to being thrown in acid.

Ahhh!

Ahhh!

They are locked in with no way out, one guest is nearly strangled to death, one having a nervous breakdown, and one murdered!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Which one is the killer? Or is it a ghost?

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Watch it yourself to find out. I will not ruin the ending of this masterpiece.

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To start Horrorfest V from the beginning, go to Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

For the previous post, go to That’s What We’re Trying to Find out! We’re Trying to Find Out Who Killed Him, and Where, and With What!: Clue (1985)

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For more Vincent Price, go to No Mere Mortal Can Resist the Evil of the Thriller: Thriller (1983)

For more ghosts, go to Night on Bald Mountain: Fantasia (1940)

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So everyone:

Happy Halloween jack-o-lantern

By the time this posts, I know Horrorfest won’t be finished, so you know what I’ll be doing tonight; but whatever you do I hope you have fun, get candy, and stay safe!

Remember:

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There’s Nothing Out There. Nothing in the Mist: The Mist (2007)

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David, there’s nothing out there. Nothing in the mist.

So The Mist was an okay movie. I thought it was doing really good and totally creepy until the end. The end was totally screwed up as the director had to go and change the story. What a loser!

Book Slappers

So this is based on a story by Stephen King. And I know y’all know that a Horrorfest would not be complete without one. It is also not a complete rip-off of The Fog (the new or old film), as everyone thinks it is. There are quite a lot similarities, but they are extremely different in the motive and what the “monster” that is attacking is. In the different versions of The Fog, the creatures are it is supernatural, while in The Mist…well, you’ll see.

So the film starts the day after a huge thunderstorm has hit a little town (of course) in Maine (the usual). A thick, unnatural mist starts to descend on the town, and at first they don’t realize that something far more sinister is lurking within it.

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So, that day David Drayton (Thomas Jane), a graphic artist, decides to go to the local grocery store to buy supplies, bringing his eight-year-old son, Billy (Nathan Gamble), and his neighbor, Brent Norton (Andre Braugher) along. You know, just a normal average day.

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So while they are at the store, another storm comes and hits the the town. This time it severely engulfs the area in a thick mist. (Whenever I bike to work early in the morning I always think about this movie and The Fog.)

They do notice something very strange. It seems as if there is a plethora of military roaming about the area.

That's strange

That’s strange

When they get to the supermarket, they find it packed with people stocking up. A military policeman, goes after the soldiers in the supermarket, telling them to pack it up as their leave is over and they need to head out. Everything is normal until a local townsperson runs into the store covered in blood.

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He begins screaming that there is something out there in the mist, killing and attacking people. People go to look out the windows to see what is out there, but the mist is so thick that they are unable to spot anything.

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Several people rush, out and everyone hears their screams…then nothing.

What!

Gilmore girls creep

The decide to seal the doors in order to keep “everything” out. One woman is worried about her children and decides to risk trying to go home. She asks for someone to accompany her, but no one volunteers.

How rude

She leaves and we never see her again.

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So as you can guess, just like Night of the Living Dead, this film becomes more of a survivor story/deconstruction of humanity than an actual monster movie. You have a group of people trying to survive in a confinied area and while some rise to the challenge, others do not. This film has all the usual Stephen King clichés, like an deeply religious psychotic person who wants to kill/punish all who tries to control every one.

Of course

Of course

It couldn’t be a Stephen King film without it.

At one point the group tries to go check on their clogged generator. A couple men go to open the loading dock door to see what the issue is when large tentacles come reaching out and kill them.

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This is just the beginning in monster attacks, as they face giant insect, pterodactyl -like creatures, and many more.

In a raid for medicine vis-à-vis The Day After Tomorrow, they run into the military supervisor from earlier hanging from a gigantic spider web. He tells them to question the men in the store for the true backstory of the mist.

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In the end it turns out that military are to blame as they opened a portal to another world.

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Yes. In an ending as disappointing as Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull aliens just leaving. (Although the worse is yet to come.)

Eventually the section of the group that is run by the psychotic women, has increased that it outnumbers the other group lead by David. As she tries to get Billy to be a sacrificed, David’s team decides to leave, risking the unknown.

They are able to score a car and the group drive as far as the SUV will take them. They take stock of their options and decide it is better to end their lives, rather than be torn apart by whatever the things are. David shoots everybody in the car, including his son. Right before he turns the gun on himself, a military tank comes charging through proclaiming that they have defeated the monsters.

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Yes. Yes. He has just killed his child and everyone when he didn’t need to.

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Now I could forgive everything else. The stupid plotholes, the crazy clichés, the other dimension monsters, ANYTHING; but that ending? Really? Really? It’s just dumb.

Duh!

Duh!

Did you guys have to that? It is so horrible! First of all as he murdered his child when he didn’t need to. And secondly, it is extremely anti-climatic! I mean come on, it would have been so much better if they just had them driving off, no one knowing what will happen to them or whether they will survive. You know, like how it ended in the book?!

BetterthantheMovie

Yep you guys really messed up there.

See Hook agrees with me.

See Hook agrees with me.

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

For the previous post, go to The Past of a Man

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For more on Stephen King, go to He Who Walks Behind the Rows

For more films based on books, go to You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Boat

For more quotes, go to Part X: The Movie List That Would Not Die

Werewolves Roam Among Us: Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet the Wolfman (2000)

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Mr. Talbot is a werewolf! And I’m not going to rest until I prove it.

I love this film! It’s one of my favorite Halloween specials. I used to watch this every year as they would air it on Cartoon Network as part of their Saturday Night Creature Double Features, pairing it up with Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein.

So Alvin is a huge Monster movie fan (just like me :D).

Universal Monster Movie Horror

The film starts off with Alvin having horrible nightmares of meeting the Wolfman.

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And wakes up screaming!

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Simon and Dave think that Alvin is watching far too many horror films. Hey he is just doing his part in protecting America.

Horror Films

Alvin doesn’t like his new neighbor, Lawrence Talbot and thinks he is a werewolf!

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And you guys didn’t miss that. It is the same name from the original Wolf Man film.

At school, Theodore isn’t having the best time. A kid Nathan is bullying him. Alvin sticks up for Theodore, but he can’t be with him all the time. The principal calls Dave in talk about this, but neither has the best plan of attack as Theodore won’t report it.

There is a problem with Alvin though. They are worried that he is a little too obsessed with monsters. He is the lead in the play version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. Dave tells Alvin that if he catches him “monster hunting” around his neighbor, he is going to kiss his part good-bye.

Good-bye

Good-bye

Alvin doesn’t stop and loses his part, although he tries to weasel his way out.

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The principal decides to give the lead to Theodore in hopes that it will help boost his self-esteem.

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Losing the part doesn’t stop Alvin as he and Simon still search to discover if there are werewolves. And if their neighbor is one.

Wolf Science

Theodore is trying to become a Mr. Hyde that everyone desires, but isn’t doing the best job. He’s just too sweet to play someone so evil.  Eleanor offers to help him out, which is a dream come true for Theodore as he is majorly crushing on her.

That night Theordore walks home and he gets bit by a dog.

attack Wolf Boy Meets World

The next day Theodore is acting strangely…

Mal_huh Whoa Wow

He is more assertive. He gives Eleanor a token of his love. He stands up to Nathan. He even is a perfect Mr. Hyde. But it doesn’t stop there, Theodore ends up becoming meaner and meaner. The Theodore we all knew and loved has almost completely disappeared.

Smooth werewolf

In fact he changes so much that he becomes a werewolf.

“[Theodore has turned into a werewolf but is acting playful]

Simon: He’s like a-a-a puppy.

Alvin: A werewolf puppy.”

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They try to figure out what to do to change him back, but keep coming up with nil. They then decide to contact a psychic gypsy woman for help.

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She tells them that Theodore has been changing rapidly and is close to becoming a full on werewolf…FOREVER!!! The only way to stop the full on transformation is to knock him around with a silver cane while he is still in the “puppy stage”.

Alvin breaks into Mr. Talbot’s house to steal his cane to use on Theodore. However, he accidentally bangs into Dave, who takes it away to return it. As Dave goes to returns the cane it becomes night. And not just night, but a night with a full moon. This causes Mr. Talbot to transform.

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Dave runs away and tries to get to the school to warn and protect the kids, but accidentally knocks himself out in the process.

At the school Theodore transforms into a werewolf and starts attacking Eleanor, but sees the necklace that he gave her and remembers his feelings. He flees into the forest and Eleanor follows. So does Mr. Talbot.

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Theodore attacks Mr. Talbot to protect Eleanor and the two get involved in a werewolf battle. The two biting each actually cures them both and turns them into humans. The crowds believe to be part of the play and applaud. And it’s a wrap! Mr. Talbot becomes the next principal.

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It’s a great film for kids and adults. Not only is it a tasteful remake, but it is also is a hilarious cartoon.

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To start Horrorfest III from the beginning, go to Even a Man Pure of Heart

For the previous post, go to Don’t F*** With the Original

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For more on Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet the Wolfman, go to Part X: The Movie List That Would Not Die!

For more on Alvin and the Chipmunks, go to On the 6th,5th,4th,3rd,2nd, & 1st Days ‘Til Christmas

For more on The Wolf Man (1941), go to Who’s Afraid of Cory Wolf?

For more on werewolves, go to Monster Movie

For more monster movies, go to You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Boat

For more films based on cartoons, go to Redone Done Right

For more modern remakes, go to Keep Clear Of the Moor. Beware the Moon