By the Sea

So I was reading Just Jane by Nancy Moser and at one point in Jane Austen’s life she traveled to sea. Later she, her mother, sister, and friend actually moved by the sea and lived there for a while.

They talk about sea-bathing and the sea-bathing machines they would use.

Sea-bathing machines? What?

So sea-bathing started in the later 18th century, prescribed by two eminent doctors, Dr. Russell and Dr. Crane. By Regency times it was super popular.

So like in today’s world, when people go swimming, or sea-bathing, we just jump right in, or tread a little in the water. But not back in Regency times.

wow

Instead they would go into a bathing machine, a large carriage like structure. There the bathers would change into their bathing suits and a horse would pull the carriage into the water.

When the reached the desired depth, the horse would be unhitched and go back to land, or take a carriageful of bathers that had finished back to land.

As the women and men would change in the machines, they were not shared by the sexes but divided between the two. Most often men and women bathed on completely different beaches as women wore muslin shifts, and men wore drawers or were naked.

By 1815 there were 40 bathing carriages and were busy nonstop between 6am-12pm every day.

Doctors prescribed being dipped into the water for one’s health. Often sturdy women were the dippers, traveling with the bathers in the carriage and dipping them so many times under the water. Kind of like being baptized, but more than three times.

For more information, go here

For more on Jane Austen’s life, go to The Curious Case and Crime of Jane Leigh-Perrot

For more Jane Austen quotes, go to Blueberry Earl Grey Tea Smoothie

For All You Know, A Witch Might Be Living Next Door to You: The Witches (1990)

For all you know, a witch might be living next door to you.

So I’m a giant fan of Roald Dahl, I’ve read pretty much everything he has written.

One book I had never read before was The Witches. I wasn’t really interested in reading about witches.

However, I was able to get a free copy of the book for free and decided to read it. The next step after reading-of course checking out the film version.

Luke Eveshim visits his grandmother in Norway and she tells them all about Witches. Witches hate children and wish to wipe them off the face of the Earth. They can smell a child a mile away.

Helga: Real witches are very cruel, and they have a highly developed sense of smell. A real witch could smell you across the street on a pitch-black night.

Luke: She couldn’t smell me. I’ve just had a shower.

Helga: Oh yes, she could. The cleaner you are, the more a witch can smell you.

Luke: That doesn’t make sense.

Helga: Oh, yes it does. A dirty child, it is the dirt she smells. A clean child, it is the child.

She then goes on to tell him how he can tell a woman is a witch:

1. “They always wear gloves–A real witch will always be wearing gloves when you meet her because she doesn’t have finger-nails. Instead of finger-nails, she has thin curvy claws, like a cat, and she wears the gloves to hide them.”
2. “They’ll be as ‘bald as a boiled egg’–Not a single hair grows on a witch’s head. You’d think this would make them easy to spot? Wrong! Real witches always wear a wig. And not just any wig. An expensive first class wig that looks like real hair. The only way to check is to give it a pull to see if it comes off.”
3. “They’ll have large nose-holes–Witches have the most amazing powers of smell and therefore have slightly larger nose-holes than ordinary people. They can even smell out a child who is standing on the other side of the street on a pitch-black night, and the cleaner you are, the more smelly you are to a witch. Witches call them stink-waves.”
4. “Their eyes change colour– Look carefully into their eyes, right into the middle of the eye where there’s normally a little black dot. If she’s a witch, the black dot will keep changing in colour, and you’ll see fire and you’ll see ice dancing right in the very centre of the coloured dot. It will send shivers running all over your skin.”
5. “They have no toes– Witches don’t have any toes. They just have feet with square ends. A real witch will hide her ugly feet by squeezing them into pretty shoes, which they find extremely uncomfortable. Look very closely and you might see a real witch limping very slightly.”
6. “They have blue spit– Real witches have blue spit, like ink (they even use it to write with). If you look very carefully you might be able to see a slight blueish tinge on their teeth.”

Shortly after, Luke’s parents die and he is to go live with his grandma. He doesn’t mind it too much, but then his grandma becomes ill and can no longer eat sweets. The doctor recommends visiting the English sea to improve her health.

They head out with Luke bringing along his pet mice, even though the manager is very much against it. He warns them that if the mouse is found anywhere not in its cage, they are out of the hotel.

Luke tries to train his mice in secret, running into an overweight boy, Bruno  who only wants to eat and then finds an empty conference room. It soon is filled with the RSPCC-the Prevention of Cruelty to Children group. But this group turns out to be something much different.

When I saw this scene I was like:

AAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I was an adult watching it. I can’t imagine how terrifying it would be to a child.

The Grand High Witch (Anjelica Huston), the boss, goes over her new plan to destroy all the children in the world.

Grand High Witch: Now, this is my plan: Each of you will go back to your homes… and resign from your jobs. Give notice. Retire. You will then buy with the money I give you…[Irvine gives her the money from the case box] Sweet shops. Candy stores. The best and most respectable sweet shops in England. [throws the money, the ladies are picking up the money] Upstairs: I have a trunkload of this English money… So, you’ll be able to offer three, maybe four times what these shops are worth. Go, go, go.

Yes, her plan is for them to sell chocolate that will transform children into:

Ahhh!

Yep, their plan is pretty sound. The only thing that throws a wrench in it is that Luke has heard the whole thing and is preparing what to do to stop them.

That is until his mouse gets away from him and reveals that he is in the room. The witches see him and turn him into a mouse as well.

Luke has to navigate the hotel, one of which does not allow mice and has said if they find any about the Eveshims will be out.

Luke hurries back to his room as fast as he can in the hopes he can make it to their room without being squished. He hurries as fast as he can and tells his grandma the whole story. The two come up with a plan to steal the Witches formula and stick it in their special banquet soup, turning them all into witches.

There are only two problems: 1) How to get past the hotel staff without being caught.

Hmmm….

And how to change Luke and Bruno back to boys again?

Will they succeed and save the world? Fail and every child be turned into mice?

So I really liked it.

It isn’t like American film, slower paced and has more dialogue than action but I really enjoyed it. Best of all they kept it almost exactly like the book.

When they showed the way the witches looked it was amazing! Completely perfect in how terrifying it is.

I liked the ending of the book better than how they changed it in the end, but the film’s ending would appeal to children more I’m sure.

To start Horrorfest VI, from the beginning, go to One of Our Guests is a Werewolf, I Know It.: The Beast Must Die (1974)

For the previous post, go to One Blow to the Head and the Deed is Done: Candlestick (2014)

For more on Roald Dahl, go to Come With Me and You’ll Be in a World of Pure Imagination: Happy 100th Birthday Roald Dahl

For more on Anjelica Huston, go to Someone Very Special: The Addam’s Family Values (1993)

For more on witches, go to It was a Horseman, a Dead One. Headless: Sleepy Hollow (1999)

Musical Madness

Day 1: Put Your Music Player on Shuffle and Write the First 10 Songs that Play

I thought this would be a great thing to start off the 30 days of getting to know me. You all know I love music, and have gotten a glimpse of some of the songs I love. But like all people, there is way more in my iTunes. So here we go! Remember these are random.

10) Something We Can’t Be by Project 86

I first listened to this song when I won a free CD sampler at this three day music festival I went to. Loved the music and the lyrics. Great song.

9) Just Can’t Wait by the J. Geils Band

So everyone has heard of their song Love Stinks. (In fact I wrote a post on it last year.) That one is unbelievably fantastic, but their other songs are also really good. This one is about how the guy just can’t wait to be with his girlfriend, although other things (her father, work/school, etc) are keeping them apart. It has a great beat to it.

8) Is She Really Going Out With Him? by Joe Jackson

The best song you will ever hear about unrequited love. Ah, this song reminds me so much of my childhood. Not that I grew up in the ’70s, my parents did, but I just loved listening to this song over and over, starting at age 7 to still playing it today.

It written as more of a story then a straight out song. The guy is getting ready for a party, when he sees the girl he is in love with. Only problem is, she’s dating another guy, a real loser. He sings about the event, how much he hates the guy, and how he wishes she was with him. A truly amazing piece. My favorite lyric is, “if looks could kill there is a man who is as good as dead”. Every line is just pure gold and extremely enjoyable. Check it out.

7) Dear God by Avenged Sevenfold

This is my favorite Avenged Sevenfold song off my favorite album. This is the “experimental” album as each song is vastly different from each other and any prior works they has created. Dear God is an extremely sad song about being apart from the one you love and hoping to get back to them. I love it so much, I guarantee there will be a longer post on it in the future.

For more on Avenged Sevenfold, go to Fantastic Fantasies

6)  I’m Thru With Love by Marilyn Monroe (Some Like It Hot! soundtrack)

Marilyn Monroe sings this song in the film Some Like It Hot! For those of you who haven’t seen it, Joe (Tony Curtis) and Jerry (Jack Lemmon) are two out of work muscians. When they unluckily witness the Saint Valentine’s Day Massacre, they find themselves being hunted down and have to disguise themselves. They had heard earlier that a women’s band going to Florida was in need of the instruments that Joe and Jerry play, the two then deciding the best way to hide out is to dress in drag and join the group. There they meet the very attractive Sugar Kane, Marilyn Monroe. Joe befriends her, and when they arrive in Florida attempts to play not only the part of “Joesephine”, but also pretend to be millionaire and Sugar’s perfect man. Jerry has his own romantic complexities as a rich millionaire, with a weakness for marrying women in show business, is attracted to Jerry’s character “Daphne”. Hilarity ensues.

The song comes at the end of the film when Joe and Jerry discover that the mobsters who are hunting them down, have a yearly retreat at the same hotel. They decide to run off, with Joe’s millionaire character having to break up with Sugar (he doesn’t want to but knows it is better to do that than just drop off the face of the earth and leave Sugar wondering what happened), Sugar is so heartbroken that she sings this song. (Now that isn’t how the movie ends, but I won’t say anymore as I don’t want to ruin the ending.

I love this song as I feel it is something anyone who has suffered from heartbreak can relate to. I almost included it in my songs for getting over a heartbreak series, to read go to If It Means a Lot to You, but had a hard time finding its perfect fit in the series. Even though I couldn’t get it to flow with that group, it still is an amazing song and worth a listen.

For more Marilyn Monroe, go to What a Girl Wants

5) Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now by Starship

I love Jefforson Airplane. And when it became Jefferson Starship after members left, I still loved it. And when more people left and it became Starship I loved it even more.

This song is most famous for being in the film Mannequin, a weird, silly ’80s film in which a man hired to be a window dresser discovers a mannequin who comes alive, but only when the two are alone. It was funny, strange, and has a great performance of James Spader as a nerd.

Anyways, the song is about how these two people have found each other and fallen in love, and with them together; nothing will stop them in whatever they are trying to achieve. I just love the song and music video, Mickey’s face (male lead singer) is so expressive.

For more Starship, go to She’s Still Preoccupied with 1985

4) Highway Star by Deep Purple

So I have already written a post on how much I freakin’ adore this song. Words cannot describe it. (Although I did try). It is one of my favorite songs and a true masterpiece of rock. Everytime I hear those opening bars I go nuts!

To read more of my thoughts, go to Highway Star.

3) Good Lovin’ by The Young Rascals

This is a song that anyone alive during 1966-2000 has heard. It has been in countless commercials, TV shows, movies, etc. It is just a great song with amazing lyrics and an incredible beat that makes you want to dance, shake, twist, and bop along. (I’m telling you that guitar is amazing!)

9) Maniac by Michael Sembello

Ah, this song. Most famous for being in the movie Flashdance. A film about a woman who is a welder by day, stripper by night, but most of all wishes to be a real dancer, a ballerina.

It’s a great song that gets you pumped up (I always listen to it when I work out), and makes you want to mimic her dance moves from the film.

And our last random pick is:

10) Stab My Back by The All-American Rejects

No band can transport me back to the days of my tweendom better than All-American Rejects. They were everywhere and in everything. And I didn’t mind as they were awesome (and still are).

This song is another great that anyone can relate to as it is all about a betrayal from someone we love and trust. (This too almost made it into the Getting Over a Heartbreak series, but also had to be culled). I love, love, love it as I do all their music.

For more on The All-American Rejects, go to Move Along

So those are my 10 random musical picks. As you can see I have a wide range of musical loves, and believe me, this was just the tip of the iceberg.

For more 30 day challenges, go to 30 Day Challenge: Disney Edition

For more music, go to The Fans and the Furious

I Left My Car in San Francisco

This postcard did not lie. I had quite the adventure in San Francisco.

Now I have traveled to San Francisco numerous times and have loved it. I have had all kind of adventures from getting lost in San Francisco, going to historic sites, traveling to see The Godfather on the big screen, touring Alcatraz at night; but nothing compares to this last trip.

So it started out very tame. My friend and I had been enjoying Martin Luther King Jr.’s  birthday weekend. As the spring term had just started, we didn’t have much homework and decided to do a Lord of the Rings marathon. As we were watching Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, one of my friends, Alex, brought up the idea of shopping in San Francisco.

Alex wanted to go to Union Square and Elaine was eager to join him. I wasn’t sure as I had work later that day, but Elaine had work too, so both assured me we would be home in plenty of time.

Yeah right.

I was waffling, but then they dangled a trip to the de Young museum. Now to some that might sound really boring, but to me that was the deal breaker. They were having this exhibit on the Dutch Masters, and I am a huge fan. Johannes Vermeer, Jan Van Eyck, Jacob Van Rusidael, Rembrandt, William Kalf, Rachel Ruysch, etc. So that was it, I was in.

So the trip was on and I was excited!

So the next day went reasonably well. We started out to San Francisco talking about music, movies, philosophy, whatever. And we headed down to Union Square.

Now I am not completely adept at fashion. In most cases I know what looks good on me and always try to dress well. Or at least matching to what I expect the day to be like.

And after all Marc Jacobs says:

Well that’s all fine for Marc, but when you go into those high end shops in San Francisco, not only do I become aware of how little money I have, but also everything that is old or wrong with my outfit. You know missing buttons, scuff marks, frizzies on the sweaters, etc.

I actually didn’t feel as self-conscious this time. And it’s not because I was wearing some great outfit. Actually, most of the clothes I saw there were just ugly. To me the colors were wrong, designs, and even the accessories. The shoes were cute though.

So Alex didn’t find anything that he wanted, and Elaine and I did not have the money for anything even if we saw something we love. So we headed down to the museum.

As we start heading to the museum…that’s when it happened.

When the engine overheats.

Ahhh!

So we need to turn the car off and let the engine cool, and figure out what to do. Only one problem, we’re in San Francisco. That means…NO PARKING!!!!!!!!!!

Crap!

Yep we drove around and around and around and around trying to find a spot but where getting NOTHING!!!! Not only is there NO parking, but all the empty spots are now reserved for smart cars. It made us all so furious!!!!!!!!

We didn’t do that. We were able to finally find a place to park. The only problem now is that Alex didn’t know anything about his car.

He had just gotten it. While he started calling his father, Elaine called her father and started looking for the manuel.

It turned out that since Alex’s car was really fancy and expensive, he needed a special kind of coolant. So then began more calls as we had to figure out which store carried the coolant to put in the car. After we found a store we had to try to get to one and find parking.

Yep, this meant we spent another 20 mins trying to find a place to park.

Crap!

We finally founs a place near an O’Reilly’s and put in the coolant. Now, by this time it was too late to go anywhere else. Alex thought we had a chance of going to the museum and then heading back, but Elaine and I both agree to  not risk it. So we said good-bye to San Francisco and started heading off toward home when…

Yep you guessed it, the adventure is not over yet.

As we start driving across the bridge the light comes on AGAIN!

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We were so scared. Now for some of you who have never been on the Golden Gate Bridge, let me tell you that is a place you DO NOT want to get stuck on. I just started praying we would make it off before something happened.

Luckily we made it off the bridge and decided to stop at the nearby Vista Point to call a tow truck.

Now I’ve never been to Vista Point before, I wasn’t ever really aware of it before this time, but apparently it is a BIG tourist attraction as the place was packed chock full of people. We couldn’t find parking ANYWHERE!

I know, just not our day. Am I right?

So we drive around and around, hoping and praying for a parking spot. Along with hoping and praying that the car doesn’t break down while we are searching for it.

And it was kind of weird because I noticed a piano mover’s truck there. Why would a piano mover stop at Vista Point and stay there? They were there for quite some time. It was weird.

Weird

Anyways, so we finally manage to find a parking spot and Alex calls a tow truck. And we all begining calling people to try and find a ride into the city with the car and a ride home.

I’m thinking, this’ll be easy!

First I call work and let them know there is no way I’ll be able to make it in and then I immediately think to call my Aunt Ann and Uncle Jeff as they live in San Francisco, and I know they would help us out. Unfortunately no answer.

So then I call my cousin Celeste who also lives in San Francisco. No answer.

Then I call my cousin Erik, who doesn’t live in San Francisco, but was visting his mom, my Aunt Ann. No answer! By now I am getting pretty upset, and wondering why NO ONE is answering their phones. This was how I felt:

(I later found out that my Aunt and Uncle didn’t answer as they were not in San Francisco but in Napa visiting friends; my cousin Celeste was in Los Angeles visiting family; and my cousin Erik was heading back to school.)

Alex and Elaine were also having no luck reaching our friends. Our friend Aylin had gone home for the weekend, as did our friends Haley and Allie. Our friend Julie was in San Francisco visiting friends, but had gotten sick and couldn’t get us either. Alex called his roommate Roger, but Roger had lent his car to his girlfriend Cora.

So we were stuck and it sucked.

Elaine’s parents lived not too far away, although with traffic it was going to be like two hours, but they offered to pick us up if we couldn’t find anybody. We didn’t really want to have them drive all that way and back, so Alex decided to call a cab into the city as soon as the tow truck took the car.

So were stuck waiting at Vista Point.

Now usually I bring a book with me in my purse just in case of situations like these.

But this was the ONE time I didn’t and it could have really come in handy.

Instead we ended up making up stories about the people who were there visiting Vista Point, in order to pass the time. The best one was the one Elaine came up with, making one couple spies on some super secret mission involving my suspicious piano movers.

Eventually the tow truck came and picked up the car. As soon as it was gone, Alex called the cab company who said they could meet us in 15.

BUT…

There is always a but

We had to go on the other side of the bridge. Yep, we had to go down the creepy stairs under the bridge that looked like they were going to fall apart.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!!

Yes, and I’m not kidding. Underneath the bridge is uber creepy. It’s the kind of place that serial killers or rapists would hang out.

I actually wouldn’t be that surprised if I saw him there. Or him.

So we finally make it to the other side and are waiting. Waiting, waiting, waiting, and waiting. 15 mins pass and no cab.

Grab your torches and sharpen your pitchforks!

Just kidding. But we are upset. It’s getting later and later, we are hungry and we want to get to the shop before it closes. Alex calls the cab company again, and they tell us the car is on the way.

Now the side of the bridge we were on was where bikers or cyclists as I should really say, hang out. There were large groups and a couple from Australia that were really cool. But…there were some really weird people.

Weird

So we had been waiting about 30 mins, when these two guys come up on their bikes. They had been drinking beer and biking. They saw me and Elaine and tried hitting on us, but they were pretty dumb.

Then they decide they need to pee and just whip their junk out in front of us.

I mean come on dudes. After that we had some other weirdos come, and we decided that the cab wasn’t coming (50 mins now). Alex called the tow company who told him he didn’t have to come today as his dad had already made arrangements. So we called Elaine’s parents and headed over to Vista Point as fast as we could.

So we went to Vista Point and started waiting. Shivering as it was getting colder. And then we discoverd that Vista Point didn’t have the best upkeep. Lights kept flickering.

It felt like we were in a horror film or something.

Finally Elaine’s parents get there, and we are all so happy we practically leap for joy!

We head on home, stopping for a bite along the way.

So that was my adventure in San Francisco, it wasn’t the first, and it will most definitely not be the last.

For more scenes from my everyday life, go to Five to Nine

For more on Marc Jacobs, go to Perfectly Imperfect

For more on Gilmore Girls, go to What a Fanatic!

Promises Were Made to Be Broken

Now everyone knows that there are three things you should never break:

But I guess not everyone got that memo. Especially one in particular, John Dashwood.

But I am getting ahead of myself, let me back up just a bit.

So when we last left off on Sense and Sensibility, Mr. Henry Dashwood’s rich uncle had died and left his state entailed. That means the money and estate gets passed on only to the male heirs.  When Mr. Henry Dashwood dies everything goes to his son John, leaving his second wife and three daughters out in the cold. Yep, entailment sucks.

But all is not yet lost. Mr. Henry Dashwood is not that old of a man. He is sure to live a long life and squirrel away enough money for his daughters. Everything is going to be just fine.

I know, that’s what you think. Within a year of having the riches, Mr. Henry Dashwood fell gravely ill, and soon death was knocking on his door.

As soon as Henry Dashwood discovers that he has no chance of surviving, he calls his son John for a meeting. He makes John promise to take care of his sisters. And John does promise.

“[John] promised to do every thing in his power to make them comfortable.”

Yeah right.

So John isn’t a complete monster. In fact his biggest fault is that he tends to think of himself more than others. And this would have been easily fixed, if he had married a nice woman. The problem is, he married this.

This horrible, horrible woman.

So John decides to give them £1000 a piece. And that is perfectly generous (he could easily give more). After all, he has the rest of his mother’s fortune, and then he will be given £4000 a year. All is good. Only one problem:

As soon as the body is in the ground, she comes to the house and starts cataloguing everything. And when she heard the plans John had she was like no way!

She thinks that by removing £3000; their boy is going to the poorhouse. So she wheedles John into decreasing that amount.

“[Henry Dashwood] did not know what he was talking of, I dare say, ten to one he was light-headed…”

Unbelievable!

So John  decides that he is giving too much and that he will instead give each sister £500. £1500 in all. It could be better, but at least it’s not nothing. But “Oh too much”, Fanny exclaims again, after all they are only half-siblings. It’s not like they are actually blood.

Did you just say what I think you said?

You girl are horrible and wrong. Half-siblings are real siblings! I know as I have one. It doesn’t change a thing. Fanny you make me so ANGRY!

I feel better now.

Anyways, as I was saying, Fanny thinks the amount is still too much. So John decides again to knock the amount down. Now they get £100. £300! That’s all!?  Come on man. That’s horrid.

And still, this is far too much for Fanny.

“I am convinced within myself that your father had no idea of your giving them any money at all. The assistance he thought of, I dare say, was only such as might be reasonably expected of you; for instance, such as looking out for a comfortable small house for them, helping them move their things, and sending them presents of fish and game…I’ll lay my life he meant nothing farther; indeed, it would be very strange and unreasonable…”

You know that is exactly what the dad wanted. Oh you, you are

Now those girls have hardly anything to live off on. And they will be unable to get married. If you thought the Bennet situation was bad, this one is much, much, much, much, much worse. At least they had a chance to marry off one of their girls to Mr. Collins, but here they have nothing.

Oh that Fanny! Curse You!

Replace Rothbart with Fanny

And you know what, she doesn’t even need it. Not only does John have a ton of money from his mother and now the entailment; but she comes from money too. Her mom’s loaded. And still, she has to begrudge these girls a few dollars.

Just goes to show you:

And that some people do not know how to keep their promises.

For more on Sense and Sensibility, go to A Family Affair

For more on Beauty & the Beast, go to Heaven on Earth

For more great quotes, go to It’s Fantastico!