My First Boyfriend is a Monster!…Literally: Sleepwalkers (1992)

My first boyfriend is a monster…literally

So a few months ago my friend ad I were watching Tommy Boy and I commented that the Rob Lowe character and his mother, were not really mother and son because they were too close. She said they could be weird like the mother and son in Sleepwalkers. I wasn’t quite sure what she was talking about and then I remembered it, sort of. I couldn’t remember much, I know I saw it or part of it on TV and there were cats involved or people who turn into were-cats?

UHHHHHHHH!!!!

So when it came to pick what Stephen King film to review, our conversation popped in my head and I decided for it to be my yearly Stephen King pick. Here we go…

So we start off with the definition of Sleepwalkers:

“Sleepwalker noun. Nomadic shape-shifting creatures with human and feline origins. Vulnerable to the deadly scratch of the cat. The sleepwalker feeds upon the life force of virginal human females. Probable source of the Vampire legend.”

We then start of on a beach with police officers, I’m getting Jaws flashbacks.

A mother and son is missing, they go to the house and OMG! Cats are hung everywhere this is horrible. This is the most horrible thing I have ever seen. I know its not real but it made me cry. I can’t watch dead cats.

***SKIP***

We have the titles and Mädchen Amick is in this. Mädchen was Shelly in Twin Peaks, I’m’ a major fan of the original show. She is such a pretty lady, many of you will recognize her as Mrs. Cooper in Riverdale.

We see a lot of cat imagery from the Egyptians in this-cats, cat people, shape shifters, etc. The only thing I don’t understand is that if they turn into cats why did they kill them? Shouldn’t they love and adore cats like in Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island. That’s a great movie.

So we are in Travis, Indiana. A shirtless guy is looking at a yearbook and listening to 1950s music on a record, then he cuts his skin, weird. He cuts a “T” for Tanya Robertson (Mädchen Amick) which has a heart doodled around it.

Oh no, a cat is sniffing around a house, there is a trap, oh no! Please not the cat.

Yes, it was okay. If this film is just about cat killing I’m not going to watch it. I’m serious, I’ll just shut it off.

He dances with an older lady…who turns out to be his mom and they are so creepy. Too close, too much like lovers. Ew, ew OMG they are kissing. No wonder I blocked this movie out. Incest and killing cats, this is the worst movie ever.

***SKIP***

Tanya is working late at the movies, dancing out to The Condors “Do You Love Me”.

Tanya is interrupted by Charles Brady (Brian Krause) the creepy guy who’s sleeping with his mom. He gets popcorn and a drink and asks to give Tanya a ride home. She turns him down, good for her, but then when he is all hurt and leaving she stops him and welcomes him to town. NOOOO Tanya, run away.

Her add picks her up, but creepy Charles is watching. It is midnight and ominous music plays while the bell tolls. Let’s see what creepy thing he does…nothing. His mom does call animal control as they attract a ton of cats. You know, between this and Cat’s Eye Stephen King just seems to love hatimg cats. Like they aren’t treated as sad deaths like the dog in Secret Window. They are treated as nothing.

So Charles is jealous and wants attention from her son, ew.

The next day Charles reads a creepy gross story about Sleepwalkers. I don’y know why Tanya is into him-that story is awful, he’s creepy, and he’s not that cute.

Ugh…

Tanya says she likes it, why?

The teacher liked the story, but seems to hate Charles, creeping on him from a window. Why?

Oh, wow…

Her friends make fun of her for “just talking” to Charles and not sleeping with hum…I have to say these friends are not good. They shouldn’t be encouraging you to sleep with a total stranger! They should be more concerned for your health and mental well-being.

The worst!

Charles offers to give her and her friends a ride and they refuse to give him and Tanya time togheter. Charles thanks Tanya for her kind words and she thanks him for writing such a great piece. Gag me! Tanya, come on-have some more respect for yourself.

Tanya takes Charles into her house and her mom has gravestone rubbings framed, so cool! She also takes him to her room and shows him her pictures, He wants to see how she takes photos, and she invites him to join her tomorrow when she takes pictures.

From Clueless

Mom interrupts them, good-he’s creepy don’t get involved Tanya. Mom is very suspicious of him, even more after he says he is a gravestone rubber too. I like this mom, she grills the boy and seems to care a lot about her child. Her mom sense must be tinging as she does not like this boy. This surprised me as most parents in a horror film are either checked out or just comedic effect.

Later, the teacher pulls Charles over, weird. Why is he following him? The teacher threatens him, not letting him get out of the car. He knows Charles is lying and is confronting him, why? Why didn’t he just go to the principal? The teacher actually slams the door on Charles hand-blackmailing him not for money as he wants a “different” exchange? Was the teacher trying to get Charles to be with him? I am so confused?

And of course Charles being a monster, rips the hand of the teacher and chases him in the woods and eats him. This whole scene is so odd and weird.

In the next scene we see a deputy and he is playing with his cat. It is so cute! Clovis the attack cat.

It makes me think of that book series Boris and Lil. Lil was the Sheriff and Boris the cat her deputy. Anyways the deputy sees Charles speeding , almost running down a girl, and follows to stop him. Yeah, Charles is crazy. Too bad Tanya didn’t see that.

Clovis meows at Charles and he becomes afraid morphing to a Catperson, Werecat. So cats scare them and can see their true form? I still find this weird as you think a Cat monster would like cats. Charles also has magic that makes him and his car invisible? Why? What?

What??

Clovis still sees it, no Clovis stay in the car-don’t get hurt. I swear, if another cat dies I’m turning this movie off.

Seriously!

Clovis tries to tell Deputy Andy, but humans can’t understand cats and they drive away.

And Charles turned his car from a blue pontiac to a red mustang. How? How does werecat magic allow you to do that?

WHAT??!!

Later the deputy tries to tell the others, what he saw but he can barely make sense of it. Poor guy, can you imagine trying to tell people you saw a cat person?

Aw, Clovis has her own cute little bed in a file area. Oh my gosh, Clovis is so adorable. She is the best part of this movie. I’m only watching for you Clovis. Andy and Clovis are so adorable, the best characters in this movie.

Back to the creepy incest mom is in a nightgown and lighted candles. Ew, them kissing. This movie is so gross. Stephen King has problems.

Mom starts smacking her son because he didn’t her the girl. They need to feed ASAP. He shares about what happened with the teacher and they are now on an expedited course to get food for mom, they are running out of time. They want Tayna because she is a pure soul (virgin)

More cats come around the house, they watch the house and plot.

I like that the cats are the heroes, they see these people for what they really are and try to stop then. Often cats are bad in stories, so its nice to see them protecting.

Ew, they are together!

***SKIP***

You know this movie is just weird and gross. I’m skipping to Clovis.

So Tonya and Charles on their date, he woges and attacks Tanya, she got away from him and runs screaming for help-right to Deputy Andy. Deputy Andy puts Tanya in his car, and goes to fight Charles who attacks him. No-not Andy!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Charles attacks Tanya, needing to feed and Andy shoots Charles who is fine and he kills Andy. Aw man, 20% of the characters I liked are gone (Deputy Andy, Clovis, Tanya, Tanya’s Mom, & Tanya’s Dad).

Clovis comes in and saves Tanya by jumping on Charles and that makes him fizz like Alka Seltzer. Tanya locks herself in the car an tries to use the radio. Charles gets in his pontiac and drives off. Aw, Clovis goes to Andy’s side and lays on him. What will happen to Clovis now? Who will take care of her?

There are more cats in the Brady yard, but Charles makes it through. His mom tries to heal him-you think they would just leave town and the movie could end here, but I’m guessing there is more to come. Oh no Mom wants to stay. Darn. Why? It makes more sense for them to leave as they have been “discovered”.

So annoying

Charles tries to “dim” himself-make himself invisible-but it doesn’t work.

Stephen King has a cameo as the groundkeeper for the cemetery. He is not a good actor. Just stop, please.

They question Tonya and she tries to give them the information, but it is all mixed up. Too bad Andy died.

They photograph Tonya, and this is so awful. Victim support is so important-the way they treat her-there are much kinder ways. She has already been through something extremely traumatic.

Poor Tonya “He was very Charming”. We’ve all been there. Boys are the worst.

Tonya hears Clovis and asks for her, as she saved her life, the police promise to bring her later. The police are headed to the house and the mom changes the car to be invisible. How do they have such powers I don’t know. If they can do that, then why don’t they make themselves invisible and sneak on people? This doesn’t make any sense.

Mom makes them invisible as the police storm in and find it “empty”, why? This is dumb, I’ll try not to waste any further brain cells on it.

It’s unimportant.

Ugh the State Trooper is such a misogynist-Captain Soames. He complain about having to watch Tonya, as she just has an overactive imagination and needs a spanking, something he would like to do. Now I don’t know what the age of consent is in Indiana but shouldn’t the commanding officer fire him?

Ugh…

Tonya goes home and takes a bath, her parents are nervous and freaking out. Mom is overcooking, dad worried about her being alone, mom trying to hold it together, both trying to be understanding but not knowing what to do-and Tonya trying desperately to get clean.

I really like the parents in this. These two are some of the best parents in film and TV, they care about their child and react realistically. Especially a situation like this when they are trying to support her but also are freaking out themselves.

Wow!

Police outside are keeping watch with one officer inside. They don’t do a good job as Ma Brady kills them.

The bell rings-no don’t go out dad. Stay alive! Yes you guessed it-Ma Brady.

Ugh!

I love the dad’s reaction as he is angry and about to give Ma Brady a few words to give to Charles about his sorry apology, but Ma Brady takes him out and the officer.

Mom comes running and Ma Brady attacks her too. She wants her to give up their daughter, but she refuses and when she hears that Charles is dying she’s glad-she then picks up a bat to try and take Ma Brady out, but Ma Brady is too strong.

Again, I love the way they did these parents-actual parents.

Tonya is running downstairs and Ma Brady wants her. More police come, but Ma Brady just goes monster on them. Meanwhile Ma Brady has knocked Tonya out and is carrying her off.

That’s not good.

Ma Brady crashes into here house and the cats attack her.  Ma wants Tonya to get with Charles, but she won’t as he’s dead! Ma insists he isn’t and uses her powers to turn the music on. Why? Why have powers if that’s all you do? This is so weird and dumb.

So Charles isn’t dead as Ma Brady wants them to dance and kiss, even though he doesn’t have a face.

Sweet, Clovis is with the Sheriff as he storms into the house. She climbs up a tree and breaks a widow. Yes, Clovis-save the girl, be the cat that Andy believed you could be, and avenge your master!

Charles and Ma look more monster like and Charles tries to feed on Tonya, but she won’t go down easy. Clovis charges into the fray to lead the attack, all the cats start charging in jumping and attacking them-Go cats, go. Take them out.

Charles is dead, Tonya took care of him-but Ma Brady is still kicking. You know they don’t really look like cat people they look like a cross between an alien and the Creature from the Black Lagoon.

NEVER SAY DIE!

Ma throws the sheriff and Tonya runs for the car, trying to find the keys. The Sheriff throws a trap at Ma Brady, which stalls her for a second, but then she kills him too.

Poor Tonya she’s all alone but then Clovis comes back, and leads an attack of 100 cats and they take Ma Brady down. You see, this is why you should always have a cat.

Ma catches on fire and Tonya finally gets the key in and backs away. Poor Tonya, she will never have a normal life. Clovis jumps in the car and Tonya hugs her tight. Aw, I hope Tonya keeps Clovis and takes care of her.

One thing for sure, Tonya will always have a cat.

Yeah, I didn’t like this movie at all except Clovis. She’s the best cat ever!

For more Stephen King, go to I’m Not Into Politics. I’m Into Survival: The Running Man (1987)

For more Werecats, go to No Mere Mortal Can Resist the Evil of the Thriller: Thriller (1983)

For more cats, go to Don’t Go in There! You Don’t Have to Die! No One Has to Die at 30! You Could Live! LIVE!: Logan’s Run (1976)

I’m Not Into Politics. I’m Into Survival: The Running Man (1987)

It is time for our annual Stephen King film:

I’m not into politics. I’m into survival.

So I promised back in January that I would review this film as it takes place in 2019 and inspired this year’s Dystopian theme. Plus I love this movie.

I know lots of people don’t care for Arnold Schwarzenegger, but I love his films. I just can’t enough of the puns and the comebacks and of course action.

So when Rob Cohen purchased the rights to the Richard Bachman novella “The Running Man”, he had no idea that Bachman was actually a pseudonym for Stephen King. I didn’t know it was a Stephen King film either, until a few years back I was trying to pick a Stephen King film and it came up when I googled him.

Huh?

I know I was in shock too, it didn’t seem like the other stuff he made. So without further ado, it’s time to start… RUNNING!

So it is the film starts off in 2018-the economy of the world has collapsed due to a lack of resources and they are all ruled by a totalitarian government that controls everyone through TV.

The people are kept in line with anyone who steps out gets sent to prison, or worse to be on the TV show, The Running Man. “Runners”, the prisoners, have to compete in gladiator-type battles against “Stalkers” who all have a theme character and weapons-kind of like wrestlers.

Does this remind you of anything? Like:

Or maybe:

Yes, it is very similar but lots of Dystopian films/books share similar things. The nice thing is that while all of these are similar-there are enough differences that you aren’t feeling like you are watching/reading something that was regurgitated.

So our story begins with Ben Richards (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is a captain of the militarized police force and is sent into Bakersfield to stop a revolt. When he does get there, he finds no dangerous revolutionaries, but just hungry people-women and children.

Dispatcher: Proceed with plan alpha. Eliminate anything moving.

Ben Richards: I said the crowd is unarmed. There are a lot of women and children down there. All they want is food for God’s sake!

Dispatcher: As you were, Richards. Proceed with plan alpha. All rioters must be eliminated.

Ben Richards: The hell with you. I will not fire on helpless people. Abort mission. We return back to base.

But the others open fire and kill all, and who do they blame? Ben of course-naming him “The Butcher of Bakersfield”. This scene always made me think of Fahrenheit 451 when they have to find a scapegoat.

He is dubbed “The Butcher of Bakersfield” and sent to prison where he serves 18 months.

He and few other prisoners work on a plan and manage to break out and get free from the electric collars. Ben heads to L.A. to find his brother. Instead he finds Amber Mendez (Maria Conchita Alonso), TV show jingle writer, residing in his brother’s apartment as he has been taken away for “reeducation”.

This is so 1984, they have to “reeducate” the troublemakers-really torture ad brainwash them.

Ben ties Amber up and investigates her apartment, taking money, her flight pass, and booking a flight to Hawaii. He wants Amber to come with as they will be looking for a single man, but she refuses. He won’t take no for an answer and convinces her by picking up the machine he strapped her to and threatening her.

This reminds me of Alfred Hitchcock’s The 39 Steps when Richard Hannay gets framed for murder and team’s up with Pamela (Madeleine Carroll), an unwilling accomplice. She hates him and fights with him, but discovers he is telling the truth and falls in love with him.

They get caught in the airport, and Ben is sent back to prison. There he is offered to be on the show The Running Man by the owner, Damon Killian, instead of rotting in prison. He is amazed by Ben’s survival skills and knows he will be a GIANT HIT.

Unfortunately, Killian doesn’t know what we do-it’s a bad idea to go after Ben. Ben refuses until they threaten to send his compatriots from the prison escape to the show. He agrees, but then finds out that Killian lied and they are all going on the show.

Gosh, I love how cooly he delivers that.

Meanwhile, Amber is like Pamela (from The 39 Steps), and starting to wonder if maybe Ben told her the truth. She goes into the files of ICS (The Running Man station and government) to see what the original recordings were. She discovers Ben is telling the truth but is caught.

So how the game works is that they are in a abandoned area of Los Angeles and have to go through multiple levels and fight different “stalkers”. If they defeat a stalker, they progress to the next level-although many don’t ever do that. Only a few even make it to the very end and win.

The first one Ben has to fight is Sub-Zero:

I love Arnold’s quips and his delivery of them. LOL.

Now that I have sen Logan’s Run, like Ben and Amber are just a more hardcore version of Logan and Jessica.

They move to the next level and are joined by Amber, who has been found and thrown into the ring. One of Ben’s friends, the hacker, knows he can get into the system if he just gets a chance. He gives the uplink code to Amber to memorize.

Then then have to face Buzzsaw:

Ouch!

They then fight Dynamo:

But Richards doesn’t kill him. It is interesting why he chooses to spare his life and not the others? Maybe because he isn’t defending himself, but it would be “murder” in his eyes. Maybe because he realizes they are all stuck in this life, all prisoners running in the hamster wheel of life created by the government?

They then head to the final level, Fireball. There they discover that the winning Runners didn’t win after all. They were killed! Just like in Logan’s Run!

They defeat Fireball and then Ben threatens Killian-I love this:

Killian is at a loss, Ben cannot win. He is inciting people to rebellion. There is only one thing left to do-bring Captain Freedom out of retirement.

Captain Freedom doesn’t want to fight and lose and Killian needs him to win so they decide to lie. They bring in stunt doubles of Ben and Amber to fight and lose-just like on Fahrenheit 451

” They know they can hold their audience only so long. The show’s got to have a snap ending, quick!” –Fahrenheit 451

Meanwhile the resistance has made it to the games and busted Ben and Amber out. Ben’s friends have been killed in the game, but luckily the hacker shared the uplink code with Amber. They come up with a plan to hack the system, reveal the truth, and destroy Killian and the others.

I don’t do requests, LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

In the end Killian is killed, the truth is revealed, Ben is a hero, and all ends well.

I really enjoy this film, but I think they could have focused more on deeper themes, but the director they had was let go a week before production and new one brought in. Knowing that, I’m surprised it was good as it was.

To start Horrorfest VIII from the beginning, go to Count Dracula the Propagator of This Unspeakable Evil Has Disappeared. He Must Be Found and Destroyed!: Horror of Dracula (1958)

For more Stephen King, go to Ever Heard of the Tommyknockers?: The Tommyknockers (1993)

For more Arnold Schwarzenegger, go to Someone Has Erased His Memory: Total Recall (1990)

For more dystopian future films, go to Tonight Has Been the Birth of the Planet of the Apes: Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (1972)

Ever Heard of the Tommyknockers?: The Tommyknockers (1993)

So guess what today is?

It’s time to review a Stephen King film!!!!!

Some of you are:

Others are:

Ugh

So I had a weird time this year. I haven’t picked a Stephen King film in a long time. I mean the last few years they have been films picked by others. So I was trying to think of his other movies and what to review.

I really enjoyed the nostalgia critic review of this film, so I chose:

“Late last night and the night before, tommyknockers, tommyknockers knocking on my door. I wanna go out, don’t know if I can ‘cuz I’m so afraid of the tommyknocker man.”

Was it really as bad as nostalgia critic said?

Well…I watched it and…I think it is worse.

Oh my goodness It was SOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOOOOOOOOOORING!!!!!!!!!!!!

So the film is in Haven, Maine-down the way from Derry, Maine (home of It). And has quite a bit of characters: as NC would say it:

So we have Bobbi Anderson, (Marg Helgenberger), who you may recognize from CSI: Las Vegas, and is a writer suffering from a writer’s block. She lives with her boyfriend and dog and found a strange object in her backyard.

Jim “Gard” Gardner (Jimmy Smits) is Bobbi’s boyfriend and also a writer. He is an alcoholic and hasn’t written anything in a long time. He was at a conference when she discovered the thing in the field.

Joe Paulson (Cliff de Young) is the mailman and constantly cheats on his wife, Deputy Becka Paulson, Allyce Beasley, (why she has a gun? I mean that is pretty dumb) with the postmistress Nancy Voss (Traci Lords).

Then there is the Brown family, the father-annoying, mean, etc-Bryant (Robert Carradine). He runs the diner with his wife Marie (Annie Corley). They have two sons, Hilly (obssessed with magic) and Davey who is scared of dolls. Their grandpa Ev, likes to tell them stories about the woods. He says there is magic in the woods-the very woods Bobbi was digging in.

And lastly, the Sheriff Ruth Merrill, (Joanna Cassidy) who has a creepy doll collection. And is in love with the Sheriff in Derry.

I know Stephen King and his character’s “personalities”.

Anyways, so the thing they find in the woods is weird and makes some disappear-like Davey and the dog, etc. When the boy disappears, all go looking for him-except for Joe who meets up with Nancy for sexy time.

Seriously man?

It also starts giving people all this mechanical and home improvement. knowledge. Bobbi builds a typewriter that writes stories for her and can redo her plumbing. Nancy builds a better mail sorter and lipstick laser. Becka turns her TV into a death trap when she catches her husband and Nancy together. The general store owner builds a silver polishing machine, and Bryant makes a BLT put together machine. Some even get psychic powers.

But with all this power it also takes something. Everything comes with a price. All but Jim are affected, as he has a metal plate in his head that blocks it, and they all look like zombies or skeletons-ashy, gray, sweaty, loosing teeth, etc. Hilly gets a giant brain tumor-and his grandpa is spared from this as he had to go to Derry to get him looked after.

The machines also go funky as they are being controlled, and when Sheriff Merrill tries to stop Bobbi and her followers, her dolls kill her.

Predictable!

Gard is the only one left. The rest try to get him drunk so he doesn’t get their real plan of world domination. When he does discover him-since they can’t control him, they make him a slave-digging out the alien ship, Bobbi’s “thing she found” turned out to be.

Officer Duggan of Derry and Ev go back to the town to help out-and a coca cola machine blows up at Duggan and Ev is stopped by his daughter and son-in-law. They uncover the ship, and Gard knows he needs to stop it. He convinces Bobbi that he is one of them-knocking a tooth out.

They go down and Gard breaks the spell over Bobbi and they save the dog and Davey. He goes in the machine and “stops” it somehow. The end.

It was boring and a lot made no sense.

For instance-why is Bryant the only man who is affected to it? Everyone else who builds things ad gets powers are women. Does Bryant have something that makes him different? Are they saying something about him? What’s that about.

Hmmm…

No offense to Becka, but why did she believe her husband “having to work late”. I mean he’s a postal employee. Why would he be there all hours of the night. They close at five no matter what or how many people are waiting in line. Believe me I know.

What is with Nancy? She likes only married guys as first Joe and then Bryant. Aren’t there any single guys for her?

Only thing I did like in this movie-Nancy goes to see Joe after Becka killed him and she’s in a black hat with veil and coat-crying and grieving. But then she tells him its time for her to move on and she rips it off to show a red skin tight dress. Hilarious! It was just so out there.

So very boring film and NOT good. Pass it on by, or watch NC‘s review if you have a hankering.

To start Horrorfest VII from the beginning, go to It’s the End of the World: The Birds (1963)

For the previous post, go to One Who Was Both Hero and Villain: Maleficent (2014)

For more Stephen King, go to Sometimes, Dead is Better: Pet Sematary (1989)

For more Nostalgia Critic, go to Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

Sometimes, Dead is Better: Pet Sematary (1989)

Sometimes, dead is better.

So in Horrorfest VI nothing has gone according to plan. Everything I usually do-haven’t done.

I was right on track and am now very much behind with no hope of catching up.

But-there is one thing that can get us back on track-

A Stephen King film!!

Yes, Stephen King. Sometimes we love his films:

Sometimes we love to laugh at the absurdity of his films:

And sometimes we hate his films:

But either way, they are always entertaining.

So it was Friday the 13th and you know what that means:

As my friends and I were trying to figure out which film to watch, Pet Sematary was suggested. I had never seen it and as I needed a Stephen King film for my blog, I was totally down for it.

Alright!

We watched it and it was pretty good.

Wow

I mean there are a few Stephen King-isms.

And at times some things make no sense at all:

And some areas move really slow.

Ugh, its taking too long.

But the story and end was pretty creepy.

So Louis Creed and his family-wife, son, and daughter- have all moved to Maine. They never give a reason why, but there is a lot of division in the home and it is clear that the Creeds aren’t quite 100% happy with their move. Something has been rotting under the surface.

Hmm…

Anyways, they meet their new neighbor, Jud -you will recognize him as Mr. Herman Munster.

Jud shows them the pet sematary that was created because of the mass amount of animals ran over by the trucks that run through the highway that is across from their property.

The Creeds have a cat, Winston “Church” Churchill and resolve to what they can to protect it.

Louis Creed is a doctor and working at the university. One day a jogger comes in,Victor Pascow, and Louis is unable to save them. But later Victor comes and haunts him, warning him to not cross the boundaries of the Pet Sematary.

Thanksgiving arrives and Louis’ wife Rachel and kids Ellie and Gage are going to Rachel’s family for the holiday. Louis refuses to go as Rachel’s father hates him. While they are gone, Church gets run over by a car and Louis has to figure out how to tell Ellie.

Jud is sad as he really cares for the Creed family-looking on Ellie as a granddaughter and takes Louis and Church to the pet sematary.

But they go beyond the sematary and into the Micmac Native American burial ground-the area that Pascow told Louis not to go. There they bury the cat and do the incantation. Louis doesn’t think that much of it, but the next day Church is alive!

Wow

But Church isn’t the same. He’s sluggish, mean, angry, and always attacking Louis.

I know, right?

Louis asks Jud, and Jud tells him that when they come back-they never come back right. But at least Ellie won’t be sad-right?

One day everyone is outside and Gage is running off, as young kids do. He runs into the street and is killed by the impact of a semi-truck.

The whole family is completely broken and grieving.

But then Louis gets an idea on how to bring him back-the sematary. Jud recognizes that is what Creed is going to do and tries to warn him against it. The cat acted weird, but his son will be worse. Someone tried that before with their son, and he returned as a zombie trying to kill everyone.

But Louis won’t listen. When Rachel and Ellie go to her parent’s home- Louis goes up to the burial ground and buries his son-waiting for him to return. Afterwards-Gage comes but he is no longer the Gage they knew.

He starts killing. He kills Jud, and goes after Rachel when she returns.

When Louis sees what has happened, he decides that he needs to clean up his mess and kills Church and Gage again. But he can’t live without Rachel. So he goes up the hill again.

I think the creepiest thing about this film was when the kid was killing people. So scary.

So yeah, pretty good one to view and something that will make any October, Friday the 13th, or Halloween film watching time great.

To start Horrorfest VI from the beginning, go to One of Our Guests is a Werewolf, I Know It.: The Beast Must Die (1974)

For the previous post, go to Scarlet Night: Archie’s Weird Mysteries (1999)

For more Stephen King, go to I’ll Be Watching You: Cat’s Eye (1987)

For more Zombies, go to I Died for You! I Came Back from the Dead for You! I Love You!: My Boyfriend’s Back (1993)

I’ll Be Watching You: Cat’s Eye (1987)

So Horrorfest V is reaching it’s last few weeks and could there be something missing?

I’ve already done an animated film like always, a Disney film, and Alfred Hitchcock. All things that have become staples every year. Now who could be missing?

A Stephen King film!!

Yes, it is time to review a Stephen King film. Not a Horrorfest has gone by without me reviewing one of his films, so here we go.

Every breath you take…I’ll be watching you

I had never seen this film before, but my friend really wanted to watch it as she loves ’80s films and was a horror film mood. Aren’t we all?

The film is actually based on three Stephen King short stories, with the only thing pulling them all together is a cat.

So the first third of the film is based on the short story Quitters, Inc. First we see our stray cat wandering the streets. It goes to a store window and sees a little girl mannequin. This changes into a vision of a real girl (Drew Barrymore) who is calling for the cat to come and save her. I guess it is another child with powers, those come up a lot in Stephen King films.

The cat gets captured by a guy who works for Quitters Inc. He takes the cat back to headquarters, where Dick Morrison is being dropped off. Now you might not recognize the actor’s face, James Wood, but you will defintely recognize his voice as Hades from Hercules.

Dick has been a long time smoker and his friend advised using the agency, Quitters Inc. to finally stop his habit. He’s given paperwork to fill out, but finds it hard to as the man next to him is hysterically crying.

His wife comes out with her clothes all messed up and looking like she has had a hard time. She is furious with her husband, blaming him, but he quiets her down and tells Dick she is having her second treatment.

Dick thinks the whole thing smells.

And he decides to leave, but before he can go he is stopped by Dr. Vinnie Donatti. He brings him into his office and explains their 100% success rate.

That poor CAT!!! I just wanted to run in and grab him, save him.

It’s okay I have you.

So yes the first offense will be James’ wife “cat room”, not too much but there will be shocking. The second offense will be his daughter in the “cat room”, third offense someone will rape his wife, and the fourth offense will be his death.

What a psychopath. A sadistic one too.

So Dick quits cold turkey and goes home. He acts like a real bear because his addiction is gnawing at him. He tries his hardest, but can’t sleep. That night he heads downstairs and starts looking for a cigarette.

When he gets downstairs, he hears a noise coming from the closet.

He grabs an umbrella and throws it at the closet, hearing an umpf. Quickly he tosses his cigarette away and takes his golf clubs out, pretending that was the whole reason he was in the office.

The next day Dick goes to visit his daughter, Alisha (Drew Barrymore) who has down syndrome and lives at a school. He brings her a doll, but sees that Dr. Donatti is watching him. Dr. Donatti warns him that his people will always be watching.

In fact, just that morning a jogger was around his house, but he wasn’t really a jogger as no jogger wears oxfords. Yes look out Dick, they are everywhere.

So Dick has been doing good for two weeks. He then goes to a party and he is the only one not smoking. The next day when he gets stuck in traffic, he finds a cigarette in the glove box and smokes it, confident no one is watching.

Majorly

The guy in the car next to him is a Quitters, Inc. agent and speeds off to report him as soon as the traffic clears. Dick tries to race home and when he gets there he finds it ransacked and his wife missing.

He runs to Quitters, Inc. and sure enough there is his wife in the cat box. Dick tries to fight with the two men and get his wife free. His confrontation frees our stray cat from his cage and he goes running off.

I’m getting out of here

Dick, however, is forced to stay and watch his wife be tortured.

Afterwards, Dick explains everything and his promise to not give into temptation and hurt his family again. I just think why didn’t they go to the police? He never signed a release form and two people will be giving testimony.

I mean, seriously.

So weeks pass and Dick has been doing great, only one problem; he’s been gaining weight. It is common after quitting an addiction, and Dick feels okay about it.

However, Quitters, Inc says that he needs to lose weight or else they will cut off his wife’s pinky finger.

A few days later, Dick and his wife are having dinner with a family friend, the same one who advised him to join Quitters, Inc. They are having a great time until Dick realizes his friend’s wife is missing the top of her pinky finger.

That means that his friend knew what was going to happen. He sent him there and new the horrors he would face. What a-

I would dump that friend and never speak to them again. And that ends our first story.

The second section comes from the short story, The Ledge. The cat and the viewers have traveled from New York to New Jersey, Atlantic City to be exact, as he continues to look for the girl in the vision. Here the cat is trying to cross a busy intersection when he is spotted by Cressner, casino owner and very powerful man. He spots the cat and bets that he will make it across without injury, while his friend thinks the cat will be killed.

All I can think:

Poor cat. They are so cruel to you.

The cat does manage to make it and Cressner takes him home; telling his two rough guys to “get him”

Who?

Meanwhile, gambler and tennis pro, Johnny Norris has been seeing Cressner’s estranged wife. He sends her away on her own as he has a few things to take care of and wants her safe from her crazy husband. As soon as she boards the bus, Johnny is beat up and taken.

He is brought to Cressner’s penthouse and Cressner tells him that he has planted heroin in his car and is going to call the cops on him. However, he will make one deal and if Johnny can do it he will get “money,the girl, the gold watch, the car, and everything.” All Johnny has to do is walk around his ledge without falling off, if he does, he’s dead.

Johnny sees no other way and agrees. However, as he starts to move around, Cressner does everything in his power to try and get him to fall off; playing a trumpet, shooting him with a fire hose, etc.

Ahhh!

He finally makes it around and back inside. Cressner gives him a bag full of money, but there is one extra item. His wife’s head.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cressner gets ready to kill Johnny too, when Johnny, angry and horrified, lunges toward him trying to knock them over. The cat joins in, causing some to trip and allows Johnny to get the gun. The cat then takes off while Johnny shoots the goon and train the gun on Cressner.

Cressner promises him anything, anything at all, just let him live. But that is not good enough for Johnny.

Instead he forces Cressner to do the same challenge he did. And Cressner isn’t as lucky.

SPLAT!

We then come to the third installment, General. The cat has finally made it to the little girl who has been calling him the whole time in Wilmington, North Carolina. However, the girl doesn’t act like she has been calling him, so why was that in it earlier?

So the little girl, Amanda, wants to keep the cat, calling him General, but her mom hates cats. She especially doesn’t want him in the house and throws him out at night. However, General knows he needs to protect Amanda and tries to find a way inside.

Meanwhile, in Amanda’s room a portion of the wall opens up and a troll appears. He kills Amanda’s bird and tries to go after her, when General manages to get through the window and save her, getting stabbed in the process.

The next day, General is kicked out of the house as “he killed polly” the parrot. General lies about injured, the husband discovering it and commenting on it to the wife; but she doesn’t care. She thinks General should die for what he did. She captures him and drops him off at the animal shelter, telling lies so that he is euthanized that night.

That poor cat. I would take good care of you.

Poor cat. They are so cruel to you.

That night the troll comes out and tries to kill Amanda, taking her breath away. General manges to escape, run back to the house, and kill the troll in the weirdest way. He traps him on the record playing Every Breath You Take, and sends him shooting into the fan, cutting him up into a million pieces.

I mean, seriously.

The parents come in and realize there daughter was telling the truth about seeing a troll and decide to keep General to protect her.

So that was Cat’s Eye, first of all it made ZERO sense!!! I mean who decided to put this together? It is just strung along and is just kind of dumb. I mean if they has made the cat a more crucial character and also gave a reason to why Drew Barrymore was calling the cat it would have been better. But mostly-

The first story was the best, but the other two were just dumb. It really isn’t worth watching.

To start Horrorfest V from the beginning, go to Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

For the previous post, go to Every Twenty-Third Spring for Twenty Three Days, it Gets to Eat: Jeepers Creepers (2001)

For more Stephen King, go to Gypsy Justice: Thinner (1996)

For more Drew Barrymore, go to What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie?: Scream (1996)

For more films based on books, go to Have You Seen Megan Hipwell?: The Girl On the Train (2016)

For more Joseph Heller, go to You Think You Know Something, Don’t You?: Shadow of a Doubt (1943)