I Won’t Leave You: Strong Woman Bong Soon (2017)

Most Romantic Moment #13

Strong Woman Bong Soon (2017)

I LOVE this TV show!!!! So much!

So Bong Soon (Bo-Young Park) is a 27-year old twin sister, (her brother Bong Ki is studying to be a doctor) living in Korea, and trying to find a job.

She wants to be a video game designer and create a game based on her, why does she want a game designed after her? Well she’s special, she has super strength. The super strength was passed through all the women in her family, but if they use it to hurt innocent people they would lose it and reap the consequences.

Bong Soon has inherited the power and has been afraid to do anything with it as she doesn’t want to abuse it or lose it. She lives her life trying to hide her abilities and be fragile as she doesn’t want to hurt an innocent, lose it, or be seen as a freak, and because her crush says he likes delicate girls.

Pretending all the time…

So there are three story lines in this show: the first is that gangsters are trying to take over and redevelop the area. Second, Mr. Ahn (Hyung-shik Park), creator of the video game company Ainsoft, is currently being threatened and he hires Bong Soon to be his bodyguard. And the third; there is a creepy guy obsessed with the fairytale Bluebeard and His Seven Wives who is intent on abducting seven women to be his “brides” and has built a secret prison under his garage where he keeps his victims.

Will Bong-Soon win over her crush? Or realize that Mr. Ahn is the best guy there is? Will they stop the blackmailer or will Mr. Ahn be destroyed? Will they defeat the gangsters? Or will they take down Bong-Soon? Will Bong-Soon stop the kidnapper? Or will he outsmart her and force her to loose her powers?

Most Romantic Moment #13: I Won’t Leave You

This moment comes near the end of the series-Bong Soon and Mr. Ahn have been spending a lot of time together-and have fallen in love. Their whole relationship is so cute!

Meanwhile, the police have failed at catching the serial kidnapper. Bong Soon beat him up, rescued the missing girls, freed her best friend-but was tricked into injuring a regular person and lost her powers, with the criminal falling into the river-presumed dead.

Bong Soon is heartbroken, and Mr. Ahn takes care of her-AW IT IS SO CUTE! I should’ve picked that moment, but oh well it will be next time…anyways they grow cuter and closer, dating. But it turns out that the kidnapper isn’t dead as the police thought (I knew it! No body? They are alive!) He has a plan to destroy Bong Soon, disguising himself, sneaking into Ainsoft, kidnapping Bong Soon, and tying her up with a bomb.

Guk Du, police officer, and Mr. Ahn try to save her, with Mr. Ahn finding her locked on the roof. He tries to get her out, but can’t get it open-damaging his hand in the process-Bong Soon begs him to leave, pleading with him-but he refuses. He will never leave her.

How romantic!

It is just so incredibly romantic as he does’t want her to be alone, he doesn’t want to be without her, and he just LOOOOOOVES her!

It is made doubly romantic as when we first met Mr. Ahn he was so used to being alone he only cared about himself. In fact, in an earlier scene (in the first few episodes) he wants Bong Soon to open the car door and start the car in case there is a bomb, so that she is hurt instead of him. He has come a long way since then, not only in putting others first, but being able to share how he feels.

For more on Strong Woman Bong Soon, go to Super Power Girl, Blackmail, Gangsters, and a Serial Kidnapper: Strong Woman Bong Soon (2017)

Let That Catherine Morland Flag Fly Free

So Horrorfest started I couldn’t tell you exactly when. I’ve always been a fan of horror, thriller, suspense, mystery, film-noir, etc. I would watch them all the time, but every day in October.

When I went to college, I continued and my roommates were thrown into my 31 Days of Horror films celebration.

Who knows?!

So when I started blogging in 2012 I decided to include it and officially create “Horrorfest”-blogging about a film every day. That way it would save my friends/roommates from something they weren’t as interested in.

Yay!!!

Over the years I have established a set of rules and annual films categories. Every year I have enjoyed doing it although sometimes I have fallen behind because of life getting in the way. Usually I have the posts written, like this year I had all 31 done extremely early-the best I have ever been, it is just the editing that slowed me down. If you have someone willing to edit your work-give them a lot of love, because it takes a LOT of time to do.

So last year I received quite a few comments questioning Horrorfest as it has nothing to do with Jane Austen. They felt that there was no reason to do it and didn’t want me to continue.

Hmmm

Well, they are right it does have nothing to do with Jane Austen.

Even though Horrorfest doesn’t really have anything to do with Jane Austen, I have tried to input anything Jane Austen related-I’ve reviewed Death Comes to PemberleyDeath by Persuasion-or things with Austen actors in it like Ruby in the Smoke and Dead Again. I’ve even reviewed some films that while not Jane Austen-are films that Austen fans will love.

But even if I don’t review something Jane Austen, I think its okay to include Horrorfest as there is one character who would love this:

Yep the Regency spooky girl:

So if you aren’t interested, feel free to skip reading me this October and join us back in November. For the rest of you, next October I’ll be back with more horror, mystery, film-noir, suspense, thrillers, etc.

So for this year’s review: how I do Horrorfest VIII is that I watch whatever, and review it. I mean I usually plan the first and last film-and of course I planned The Planet of the Apes series review after someone donated the set to the library-yet it always amazes me how many match up themewise.

This year we had gothic films with the Horror of Dracula and Rebecca.

We also had a multicultural Horrorfest VIII as my Jane Austen profile pic was inspired from my Mexican culture, we had Horror of Dracula from England, High Seas AKA Alta Mar from Spain, Spirited Away from Japan, and Strong Woman Bong Soon from Korea.

We had dystopian futures with Planet of the Apes, Beneath the Planet of the Apes, Escape from Planet of the Apes, Conquest of the Planet of the Apes, Battle for Planet of the Apes, Logan’s Run, and The Running Man.

We had Non-Austen Films for Austen Fans with Alta Mar AKA High Seas,Death By Persuasion” from Midsomer Murders, Rebecca, and Strong Woman Bong Soon.

We had superheroes with Batman, Strong Woman Bong Soon, and Unbreakable. 

Ghosts with The Fog, R.I.P.D., Spirited Away, and 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo.

And apes with the Planet of the Apes series and King Kong.

And of course our Annual films:

  • A movie or TV episode from every decade of 1930s-2010s
  • Doubledose of Alfred Hitchcock with Alfred Hitchcock Presents and Rebecca
  • Animated Film with Spirited Away, Disney with Spirited Away, 
  • Doubledose of Lifetime with Death of a Cheerleader and Psycho Mother-in-Law,
  • Stephen King with The Running Man
  • Tim Burton with Batman
  • Vincent Price with 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo

The full list of films, TV episodes, and video game reviewed for Horrorfest VIII:

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

King Kong (1933)

Rebecca (1940)

Lamb to the Slaughter” from Alfred Hitchcock Presents (1958)

Horror of Dracula (1958)

The Notorious Landlady (1962)

Planet of the Apes (1968)

Beneath the Planet of the Apes (1970)

Escape from Planet of the Apes (1971)

Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (1972)

Battle for Planet of the Apes (1973)

Logan’s Run (1976)

The Fog (1980)

Dark Crystal (1982)

To All the Ghouls I’ve Loved Before” from 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo (1985)

The Running Man (1987)

Batman (1989)

Dead Again (1991)

Leprechaun (1993)

Death of a Cheerleader (1994)

“The Puppet Show” from Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997)

Unbreakable (2000)

Spirited Away (2001)

The Stepfather (2009)

The Last Christmas: Shadow Island Mysteries (2010)

R.I.P.D. (2013)

Death By Persuasion” from Midsomer Murders (2017)

Strong Woman Bong Soon (2017)

Veil of Secrets (2018)

High Seas (2019)

Psycho Mother-in-Law (2019)

Super Power Girl, Blackmail, Gangsters, and a Serial Kidnapper: Strong Woman Bong Soon (2017)

Strong Woman Bong Soon is a Korean drama, Him-Ssen Yeo-ja Do Bong-Soon, that I just love and am thoroughly depressed that it is only one season and over.

The best thing about this film is that it is fun, dramatic, deals with the ideas of superheroes in a realistic way along with being entertaining and fun. I’m so tired of American TV being so serious, broody, and depressing. I wish we had more mixed shows-like Psych was a cop drama, but also a comedy. Or how Boy Meets World was silly and light-hearted but dealt with serious issues.

So Bong Soon (Bo-Young Park) is a 27-year old twin sister, (her brother Bong Ki is studying to be a doctor) living in Korea, and trying to find a job.

She wants to be a video game designer and create a game based on her but is having a hard time getting and keeping a job.

Why does she want a game designed after her? Well she’s special, she has super strength.

It all started back with her great-great-great grandma. She had super strength, but when she used it to hurt innocent people, she lost her ability and gained leprosy. The super strength was passed through all the women in her family, but if they use it to hurt innocent people they would lose it and reap the consequences.

Bong Soon’s mother, Hwang Jin-yi, used her power to compete in the olympics for Korea, which was okay. But when she used it to shake down people and to make money, she lost her ability as well.

Bong Soon has inherited the power and has been afraid to do anything with it as she doesn’t want to abuse it or lose it. She lives her life trying to hide her abilities and be fragile as she doesn’t want to hurt an innocent, lose it, or be seen as a freak, and because her crush says he likes delicate girls.

Pretending all the time…

Yes, Bong Soon has been in love with her brother Bong Ki’s best friend has Guk Du (a police detective) since she was a child. He has a girlfriend though.

So there are three story lines in this show:

1)Gangsters

Don’t mess with me!

The area Bong Soon lives in has gangsters trying to take over and redevelop the area. They have been harassing people and Bong-Soon’s mom wants to get involved with them as she wants to make money even though innocent people are getting hurt.

2) Blackmail

Mr. Ahn (Hyung-shik Park), creator of the video game company Ainsoft, spends most of his days alone. He is haunted by a memory of a girl, who he believes to be a guardian spirit, that saved him years back. He goes into work twice a week and spends the rest of him time alone, playing video games and designing new ones. He is currently being blackmailed to give up all intentions of inheriting his father’s company or else he will lose Ainsoft.

3)Serial Kidnapper

Meanwhile, there is a creepy guy obsessed with the fairytale Bluebeard and His Seven Wives lurking in the Dubong area. He is intent on abducting seven women to be his “brides” and has built a secret prison under his garage where he keeps his victims. Guk Doo is one of the police working on the case.

Ready for any case

All these stories intersect when one day Bong Soon is bicycling when she encounters some gangsters assaulting an old man who is driving a group of daycare kids. She is harassed when Mr. Ahn comes upon them. He calls the police, but before they get there Bong Soon takes them out.

They all go to the police station, where the gangsters are pressing charges against Bong Soon, but Mr. Ahn rescues her by going on how ludicrous the idea is of 5’2 petite Bong Soon beating up all these gangsters.

Bong Soon isn’t interested and dresses down Mr. Ahn. Then she rides off on her bike. Mr. Ahn is extremely interested and tracks her down, offering to hire her as his bodyguard. She thinks it is a crazy idea, but agrees when she hears how much he is offering to pay her.

Mr. Ahn and Bong Soon team up to stop the blackmailer-using his brain and tech, and her strength and compassion. Mr. Ahn even starts training her to help her control her power and be ready for anything.

As Mr. Ahn spends so much time with her, he starts to really enjoy spending that time with her, falling head over heels. But he has to convince Bong-Soon he is serious and that the rumors of him being gay are false.

Meanwhile, the gangsters are extremely embarrassed over her having bested them and they try to go after her, but each time they just end up in the hospital. It turns out that these same gangsters are involved in the blackmail as well.

Hmmm…

Bong Soon becomes involved with the kidnapping case when she goes to the hospital to visit Mr. Gong (who’s tailbone she accidentally fractured) and witnesses the kidnapper disguised as a doctor kidnapping one of his victims. She runs into him a few more times and Guk-Doo tries to place her in his care and watch for her, having her stay with Mr. Ahn (which he likes, but Guk-Doo doesn’t).

YEEEEES!!!!!!

One night she and her best friend (who is visiting) are making stew, her friend going out to get some tofu. One her way back she is attacked by the kidnapper. Bong-Soon, worried that her friend is taking a too long, comes upon them and saves her.

After her friend thanks her for saving her, Bong-Soon starts thinking about all the other people out there that might need help, and decides to go after the kidnapper.

This kidnapper becomes her supervillain as he is intent on taking her down. He is the perfect foil for Bong Soon-Bong Soon is perky and sweet, he is dark and demented. Bong-Soon is short and petite, he is tall and built. He hates women and enjoys torturing them, she is strong, powerful and is going to find and stop him.

Will Bong-Soon win over Guk-Doo? Or realize that Mr. Ahn is the best guy there is. Will they stop the blackmailer or will Mr. Ahn be destroyed? Will they defeat the gangsters? Or will they take down Bong-Soon? Will Bong-Soon stop the kidnapper? Or will he outsmart her and force her to loose her powers?

Trust me, watch this and you’ll love it. It is so cute and pay attention-they repeat certain things. And oh that ending-so adorable!

So now on to the other reason why I wanted to review this show:

Yes, it reminds me a lot of Jane Austen.

First we have Bong-Soon. She is sweet and innocent like Catherine Morland, passionate like Marianne Dashwood, witty like Elizabeth Bennet, romantic like Anne Elliot, and logical like Elinor Dashwood. She’s got a bit of everyone in her and it is great.

Or Mr. Ahn

That leads us to Mr. Ahn. When we first meet him he is closed off and rude, Bong-Soon and him not having a great relationship to start with. She is upset over her pride being hurt, and he wants nothing to do with anyone. We then discover he has a truly painful and heartbreaking backstory.

Like Mr. Tilney, he is sarcastic, fun, and outright hilarious. He end up helping train Bong-Soon, guiding her like Mr. Knightley. He even gets a horrible video of Bong-Soon taken down, to help her-just like Mr. Darcy. He’s also rich like Mr. Darcy and makes me think of him in a few other ways:

Or like how once he gets feelings for her he tries to be cool, but can’t hold it in.

Their relationship is just adorable and I think all Jane Austen fans will love it and them.

So cute!!

We then have the most Jane Austen character of them all Bong-Soon’s mother. She seriously could give Mrs. Bennet a run for her money. She goes to the temple and prays for the marriage of her daughter, even going to see a fortune teller to get a special something to get Bong-Soon and Mr. Ahn hitched. She doesn’t even care about the rumors of him being gay, she wants her daughter to marry the handsome man and his money. One night Mr. Ahn asks Bong-Soon to stay with him after he was attacked earlier in the day. Guk-Doo comes in trying to get her to leave as he doesn’t want them staying together as he thinks Mr. Ahn is trying to take advantage of Bong-Soon (and he doesn’t know that Bong-Soon is his bodyguard or super strong). Guk-Doo calls her mom, and she eagerly thrusts her daughter at him-Just like when Mrs. Bennet tries to make Jane sick to stay with Mr. Bingley.

Like that is soo Mrs. Bennet.

Trust me, check this out as it is an AMAZING show!

I can’t stop watching!

To start Horrorfest VIII from the beginning, go to Count Dracula the Propagator of This Unspeakable Evil Has Disappeared. He Must Be Found and Destroyed!: Horror of Dracula (1958)

For more Non-Austen Films for Austen Fans, go to We’re Stranded on a Ship in the Middle of the Ocean with a Killer!: High Seas (2019)

For more superheroes, go to Superhero Film or Stalker Thriller: Unbreakable (2000)

For more blackmail, go to The Misery That Walks Around On This Pretty, Quiet Night: Deadline at Dawn (1946)

For more kidnappings, go to What Happened to Ally Palmer?: The Good Student (2006)

Superhero Film or Stalker Thriller: Unbreakable (2000)

So with Glass having come out this year, I thought why not review the first of the trio-Unbreakable.

So I watched this film years ago in school. I think it was when I was a senior and they were doing STAR testing. It was in 2010 that I had watched it and M. Night Shyamalan had kinda hit a dive.

Ouch

There was The Sixth Sense that put him on stage- then Signs, which I liked. We then had The Village, which was blah-then Lady in the Water, The Happening, The Last Airbender, Devil, After Earth-all awful and horrible.

I had never heard of Unbreakable as it kind of slipped through the cracks. I don’t even remember any marketing for it-like with his other films. I think it was lost between the big success of The Sixth Sense (1999) and the marketing for Signs (2002).

Meh.

I think too is that it was a different type of film. It is not exactly a comic book film like Blade (1998), X-Men (2000), and Spider-Man (2002). It wasn’t a big action film, with fights, costumes, etc. It is a very different story.

So David Dunn (Bruce Willis) works security at the college stadium and he and his wife, Audrey (Robin Wright) have been having marital problems-they are sleeping in separate rooms and he looking to New York to find a new job (maybe as a police detective? Huh, any Die Hard fans out there?)

Everything changes when his train crashes-all are injured and die, except David.

After the accident his son, Joseph, sticks him like glue-horrified about how close he was to losing his father.

David gets an invitation to a gallery opening on comic books, and takes Joseph there. There they meet the owner-Elijah Price, who has been searching for someone like David.

Elijah Price (Samuel L. Jackson), has a rare condition where he is extremely fragile. He does barely anything, and his bones break. He knows that if there is someone like him out there-there must be the opposite-a strong man.

*Sidenote* I just noticed that Elijah Price wears a purple suit reminiscent of the Joker’s purple suit in Batman (1989). I never noticed that before, but it should have been a sign.

David thinks he is crazy, and leaves. Joseph, however, loves the idea of him being a superhero and keeps pushing and testing him.

Elijah doesn’t give up and slowly David begins to accept the idea as well and tries to become a hero.

Wow!

Now when I re-watched this film, I realized something. This isn’t really a superhero film, but a crazy stalker film.

I mean David clearly tells Elijah to leave him alone, that he is not interested-but Elijah doesn’t give up. He goes to his work, calls him, implements himself into his life, gets his wife as his physical therapist and goes at her too.

This guy is a serious creep!

Soon Elijah has even manipulated himself into being David’s best friend and confidante. In fact it is SUPER creepy.

Spooky…

I mean imagine if David was a woman, and constantly telling the guy not interested-but he went after her, her child, her husband-that’s a Lifetime plot!

I mean, if you look at the film that way instead of a superhero film-it is a super creepy movie. I don’t know if I’m just more sensitive because of my ex-but I recommend re-watching the film, and look at it through that lens-it is much scarier and I think way better.

And the facebook banner:

To start Horrorfest VIII from the beginning, go to Count Dracula the Propagator of This Unspeakable Evil Has Disappeared. He Must Be Found and Destroyed!: Horror of Dracula (1958)

For more Bruce Willis, go to Secrets are Great, Unless You Get Caught: Perfect Stranger (2007)

For more Samuel L. Jackson, go to We’re Mad Scientists. We’re Monsters: Avengers, Age of Ultron (2015)

For more superheroes, go to Austen Avengers Assemble!

Austen Avengers Assemble!

So back when Avengers: Age of Ultron came out someone did a post on what Austen characters they would have as the Avengers. I read it and did not agree with several of their choices.

So I decided I would do my own post, and meant to put the original link here, but forgot!

So sorry to whoever it was!

So I jotted down my thoughts, saved the draft and meant to come back and finish, but I forgot all about it. May 2015 was a hard month for me, I had an ear infection and an over 100 degree temperature-plus you know life-

But this year I have been going through my drafts trying to clean them out and finish my thoughts-and I spotted this. As The Avengers series is ending, not really as you know Disney is all about them dollars:

But as this is the “end”, The Avengers: Endgame, I decided what better time than now to post it?!

Another thing that is ending this year

So I did not like Avengers: Age of Ultron and after watching that movie I stopped watching The Avengers films all together. There are a lot of reasons why, and if you are interested go to this post. Basically-if I don’t like something, I stop watching the series. So just to clarify-I will only be using the superheroes from The Avengers and The Avengers: Age of Ultron films. I also will only be doing the female Austen characters and their Avenger counterparts, maybe I’ll do one on the men in the future, who knows? But as for now, let’s get this mashup started!

Another thing ending this year!

Jane Austen Avengers Mashup!

***Contains Spoilers***

We will start with Sense and Sensibility and work our way through the Austen novels.

Nick Fury-Elinor Dashwood

Elinor was a bit hard to find someone to match up with, but I decided on Nick Fury.

Nick Fury is the leader of The Avengers. He is the oldest of three, and has had to learn responsibility at a young age. After a long, illustrious career, he goes on to be the leader of S.H.I.E.L.D. Not only does he work for a secret organization, but he knows more about what is going on than anyone else in the movie-from secret families, wishes, covert agents, etc.

Elinor is the oldest of three and after her father passes away, has to take on responsibilities of the home. Elinor may not be the leader of a secret organization, but she is the secret keeper of this book. From illegitimate children, secret engagements, wards of the family, lost loves-etc she knows it all.

Both are intelligent and good judges of character, but can be fooled by a charismatic person (Willoughby and Robert Redford’s character in The Winter Soldier)

Now some may not see how level-headed and controlled Elinor could ever compare to the loud and aggressive Nick. While Elinor may not be as loud and curse, she does have moments when she too loses her temper.

It might not be a perfect comparison, but the one I felt was the closest.

For more on Elinor Dashwood go to The Austen Series: Reason and Romance

Hulk (Dr. Bruce Banner)-Marianne Dashwood

Both are controlled by their feelings so this was an obvious mashup.

Dr. Bruce Banner has had many incarnations-but what stands out to me is how he can range in emotions from sarcastic, witty, self-assured, to depressed, sensitive, and worried-ultimately running the full gauntlet…just like Marianne. Marianne, like Bruce, is confident, self-assured, and firm in her beliefs. When things happen in life, Marianne betrayed in love and Bruce’s Gamma Ray incident, both become depressed, sarcastic, and lose sight of who they are-both trying to give up on living. Ultimately, they work through these feelings and regain some of their confidence and sense of self-Marianne being more reserved and thoughtful while in Avengers Bruce accepts his green self and is able to use his ability to help and be a team player.

Both have deep emotions and can go to extremes when they feel. And when they feel, you see it-no hiding that from anyone.

Dr. Banner is well educated, read, etc-while Marianne has’t achived the samr level-she too is well read and educated (as she comes from a wealthy family).

Both need encouragement from friends/family and both also discover that someone they wouldn’t have thought at first is the person for them (although the Colonel Brandon and Marianne storyline makes a lot more sense than the Black Widow and Hulk one).

For more on the Hulk/Dr. Bruce Banner, go to Avengers Assemble

For more on Marianne Dashwood, go to We Are Family: Austentatious (2015)

Thor-Elizabeth Bennet

So I was split between who to be the equivalent to Thor and finally after a long deliberation, settled on Elizabeth.

Thor is Odin’s heir and favorite son, although he is stubborn, impetous, and opinionated. Elizabeth is her father’s favorite daughter and is stubborn, obstinate, and headstrong. Both are fun, well-educated, and have great wit.

Both fall for people who they don’t begin on the right foot with. For Thor, Jane at first is not interested and gets upset with the way he talks and treats her, same for Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy, but eventually they move past the misunderstanding and have a great relationship.

The thing that clinched it for me was the family drama. Thor’s little brother Loki causes a lot of problems, trying to take over the world, almost destroying everything and him. Elizabeth’s little sister might not have been as bad, but she too does what she wants-not caring how it affects everything and almost detstroying Elizabeth and the family’s reputation.

For more on the Thor, go to Anger Management

For more on Elizabeth, go to Mrs. Darcy Wants to Know the Truth!: Death Comes to Pemberley, Episode Three (2013)

Hawkeye (Clint Barton)-Fanny Price

So everyone hates on Hawkeye, he’s the “who cares” member of the group (at least we did back in 2015). Fanny Price, unfortunately, gets the same treatment. Both may not be flashy, have cool powers, the best romantic lead, money, etc-however, they are important characters and there is a lot more to them than meets the eye.

So Hawkeye had a rough start with his parents dying, being sent to an orphanage, running away to the circus, being betrayed by his mentor, and losing his brother and feeling alone. Fanny did not have the same type up upbringing, but understands what it is like to be alone. Sent from her family to stay with relatives she never met before, bullied by her cousins, being treated as a little higher than a servant, betrayed by her uncle when she won’t marry the man he picked out, etc.

In The Avengers: Age of Ultron, Hawkeye turns out to be the linchpin of the group (Bones reference) -why? I don’t know, but he is. When everything is falling apart he knows what to do and takes them to his farm-keeping calm and helping lead the group out of this storm they are in. Fanny is the linchpin of her family, the moral compass, who helps right things after Maria runs off with Henry, Julia elopes in Ireland, and Tom gets deathly ill. They couldn’t have continued if it wasn’t for her calm demeanor.

The other thing I find similar is that both are observers of the group-Hawkeye sees from the “Hawk’s Nest”-watching out and watching the team, and Fanny “I was quiet, but I was not blind.”

For more on Fanny Price, go to Jane Austen Chinese Zodiac

Iron Man (Tony Stark)-Emma Woodhouse

Both characters were described by their authors as characters “only they would love”, so of course these two are the equivalent.

Tony Stark is wealthy, spoiled, and raised by parents who gave him a lot of power and free reign. He is a genius who inherits his family company at a young age and has to take responsibility.

Emma is also wealthy, spoiled, and raised by a father who gives her a lot of power and free reign. She might not inherit a company, but she does become mistress of the house and there is little doubt as to who her father will leave her estate to.

Both are powerful manipulators, using their power, prestige, wealth, and beauty. They can be reckless to the point of destroying lives (Emma almost ruins any chance of Harriet marrying and Tony you know almost destroys the world). They also tend to go too far and luckily have people who can bring them down to Earth and point them back on the right path, Pepper Potts/Rhodes and Mr. Knightley.

Both are betrayed by people they thought they were close to, for Tony it is Obadiah Stone, his father’s longtime partner, and Emma its Frank Churchill, the man all had been planning her to marry.

Both end up finding love with someone they’ve known for years, both more mature (in spirit and Knightley’s case age as well) who can see past their faults and help them be the best person they can be.

And of course, Gwenyth Paltrow is in both films.

For more on Iron Man/Tony Stark, go to We’re Mad Scientists. We’re Monsters: Avengers, Age of Ultron (2015)

For more on Emma Woodhouse, go to Dull Times Breed Disaster

Captain America (Steve Rogers)-Catherine Morland

Both are young, sweet, idealistic, and at times naive. “No one who had ever seen [them in their] infancy would have supposed [them] born to be [heroes]. [Their] situation[s] in life, the character of [their parents, their] own person and disposition, were all equally against [them].”

Steve was raised in Brooklyn, NY-and wants to go off and save the world. That wish is granted with the trip of a lifetime-to a secret lab, getting superhero powers, traveling to get war bonds and help improve morale, going off on his own “trip” to help his friend. Catherine is given the trip of a lifetime too, as family friends whisk her along to Bath (not as epic but still fun). There Catherine may not have gone through physical changes like Steve, but emotional ones as she grows up a bit and controls her imagination.  She also goes go off on her own separate trip (to Northanger Abbey).

Both have hiccups in their dating, with Steve being kissed enthusiastically by a WAC, even though he only has eyes for one girl. He tries to straighten it out, but it doesn’t quite work as well as he hoped. With Catherine, she only has eyes for Mr. Tilney, but gets manipulated out her walk with him by the enthusiastic Mr. Thorpe.

Many want to use Steve because of his abilities or his looks, the same with Catherine. They believe she is richer than she is and she falls victims to two men trying to play her as a game piece.

Both don’t always catch on to the jokes said by others. With Steve, he has almost 70 years worth of history and pop culture he’s missed out on, and Catherine doesn’t always pick up on sarcasm.

For more on Captain America, go to Every Heart Beats True for the Red, White & Blue

For more on Catherine Morland, go to Catherine Morland’s Reading List

Black Widow/Natasha Romanova-Anne Elliot

So I had a hard time with Black Widow and trying to figure out who she worked best with. After a lot of deliberation, I finally settled on Anne.

Black Widow is woman who people look at and think they know her life story-but there is faaar more to her than you would think. Yes, she is a super spy, enhanced, and has a dark past-but it is way more convoluted with ups and downs. Anne is the same way…all look at her and see a kind woman who was proposed to once (by Charles Musgrove), but turned him down. What no one knows, and no one could fathom, she had a handsome sea captain after her, or that her cousin William Elliot is after her!

Both have been persuaded into making certain choices (in Black Widow’s case actual torture and brain washing, while Anne has an old family friend maneuver her choices.)

Both have a lot of secrets, and can blend easily into the background just as they can stand out and take control of stressful situations. They can be more intense than others think and are given great one-liners.

For more on Anne Elliot, go to You’ve Persuaded My Heart

So what do you all think? Do you agree? Disagree? Comment below!

For more Mash Ups, go to You Put the Jedi in Pride & PreJEDIce
For more on Avengers, go to Simply Fantastic
For more on Sense and Sensibility, go to Dangerous to Know, Jane Austen’s Rakes & Gentlemen Rogues: MODERATE
For more on Pride and Prejudice, go to Pride, Prejudice, and Personal Statements
For more on Mansfield Park, go to The Heartbreak Kid
For more on Emma, go to Victoria and the Rogue
For more Northanger Abbey, go to Did Jane Hate a Richard?
For more Persuasion, go to Dangerous to Know: Jane Austen’s Rakes & Gentlemen Rogues

It’s Strange: Doctor Strange (2016)

It’s Strange.

Maybe. Who am I to judge?

So I was never super into the Doctor Strange comics. The only time I ever encountered him was through his interaction with Spider-man.

I wasn’t planning on checking it out, but then I had some friends want to watch it and we did. Let’s see, what did I think of it:

First of all let’s talk about the most awful thing in the film-Benedict Cumberbatch’s American accent.

Ugh.

It was so weird. I mean I know what he really sounds like from his other shows, so hearing him try to be “American” was so hard and made it impossible to get into the film fully.

The other issue I had with the film was the visual effects. I know everyone loves CGI and they love the crazy things they do in her. But I have really bad vision, really bad. So whenever things get blurry or moving everywhere it gives me such a bad headache and makes it difficult for me to get into it.

Then we had the character.

I felt the story was really boring and something we’ve seen again and again. An egomaniac who has no time for anyone and does all kinds of great things; then he gets injured and can no longer do what he did before; he goes on a big journey of self-discovery; and becomes a new person. It wasn’t bad, I just felt this plot was overdone.

For me I just found the whole thing to be:

Meh.

It’s not the worst Marvel film, but definitely not one of the best (to me).

To start Horrorfest VI from the beginning, go to One of Our Guests is a Werewolf, I Know It.: The Beast Must Die (1974)

For the previous post, go to Sometimes, Dead is Better: Pet Sematary (1989)

For more superheroes, go to The Cruel Giggling Ghoul: Teen Titans Go (2016)

For more on Benedict Cumberbatch, go to Fan-do or Fan-don’t. There is No Fan-try

For more on magic, go to Those Aren’t Men They Are the Living Dead: White Zombie (1932)

The Cruel Giggling Ghoul: Teen Titans Go (2016)

So you know what that means: Horror TV episodes Tuesday

I know this is a little odd, TV episodes on a Tuesday instead of Friday as I’ve been doing for the past few years?

Help me! I’m confused!

Well this year I decided to do something special for Friday the 13th, which means I can’t put my reviews of TV shows on Friday.

So instead we will be reviewing TV episodes on Tuesdays, TV Tuesdays.

Now I HATE Teen Titans Go.

I grew up watching the original Teen Titans and it was hilarious, fun, serious, dramatic, etc. Simply amazing! In this one they don’t even fight crime!!!

Huh?

Superheroes who don’t fight crime????!!!!!!!!

Yeah it is about them doing mundane “normal” people things or redoing movies/TV shows.

And none of the episodes really go together in a sequence.

I don’t usually care for it, but this particular episode was pretty funny.

So the gang: Robin, Starfire, Raven, Beast Boy, and Cyborg are headed to a nearby amusement park to see Lebron James perform. Right away I notice Beast Boy shapeshifting into a dog and Raven wearing something she doesn’t typically have on.

There are five in the group-two girls, two boys, and an animal (Beast Boy). It is clear what they are parodying:

Yes the gang of superheroes have come to the amusement park only to see it empty of customers. There is a giggling two-headed ghoul, who is awfully reminiscent of the Creeper:

It is really silly. You have the cameo of the famous celebrity, Lebron James, and him popping up everywhere dribbling. Which reminds me of the Harlem Globetrotters episode.

Robin gets to be Fred going off with Starfire (Daphne) and Raven (Velma).

And then Cyborg and Beast Boy do all the silly dress-up, out maneuvering, eating, etc that Shaggy and Scooby-Doo would do.

Yep it gave you all the stuff you loved of the original, poking fun at it in a good way. And who does it turns out to be? You have to watch and find out.

To start Horrorfest VI from the beginning, go to One of Our Guests is a Werewolf, I Know It.: The Beast Must Die (1974)

For the previous post, go to China is Here Mr. Burton. The Chang Sing, The Wing Kong, They’ve Been Fighting for Centuries: Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

For more on Scooby-Doo, go to To Kill a Fangirl

For more superheroes, go to I Always Knew and I Didn’t Care: Usual Suspects, Young Justice (2012)

For more parodies, go to I Don’t Want to Be a Vampire. I’m a Day Person: Once Bitten (1985)

For more TV episodes, go to The Hash-Slinging Slasher: Graveyard Shift, Spongebob Squarepants (2002)

I Always Knew and I Didn’t Care: Usual Suspects, Young Justice (2012)

Romantic Moment #13

Young Justice

“Usual Suspects”, from Young Justice

So I haven’t gotten around to adding this show to my list of fangirling, but this is a show I thought was just fantastic.

Iloveit love

My friend actually got me interested, and once I started watching, I just couldn’t stop.

HookedOnShowWatchEveryEpisodeBigBangTheory

Why did they only have three season? It was amazingly well done in presenting the characters, the backstories, and the issues they face. This should have kept going.

Why?

Why?

Anyways, let’s move on.

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So this episode comes at the very end of the first season. Having been rejected into joining the Justice League, they have their own group, Young Justice, that consists of Superboy (Superman’s clone): M’gann/Megan as Miss Martian (John the Martin Manhuter’s niece); Artemis (Green Arrow’s niece); Dick Grayson’s Robin/Nightwing (Batman’s protogeé); Wally West as Kid Flash (the Flash’s nephew); and Kaldur’ahm’s Aqualad (Aqua Man’s sidekick).

Young Justice

The team work hard to prove their worth; showing that are more than secondary characters. There is also secrets, betrayal, love; and a lot more twists and turns that make this series solid.

loveitSupernatural

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Most Romantic Moment: I Knew and I Didn’t Care

**Spoiler Warning**

So Megan has been blackmailed by a villain into doing her bidding or else it will be revealed as to what she really looks like. You see, on Mars there is serious racism between the Green and White martians. Megan was born as a White Martian, and not gonna lie is pretty terrifying. She’s always hated how she looks,

anthony-michael-hall-brian-insecure-quotes-the breakfast club see myself don't like what i see insecure body image

As she has the power to change her appearance all the way down to a cellular level, when she comes to Earth she pretends to be a green martian and copies the form of an actress she admired.

But when this secret threatens the group, she decides to reveal all, but is terrified that they will have the same disgust as those on her home planet.

However, when she reveals her true form; her boyfriend Superboy and the others don’t care. In fact Superboy has known all along, even before they were a couple, and it never mattered to him.

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Aw! How sweet!

Aw! How sweet!

And to make it even cuter. In an earlier episode, Image, Megan lies about how she looks and Superboy told her then he didn’t care.

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He knew then, but never let on: letting Megan reveal herself when she was ready. How sweet!

Aw!

So romantic

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To start Romance is in the Air: Part V, go to I Did It for You: Edward Scissorhands (1990)

For the previous post, go to Even Though You Are Only Using Me and Made Me Look Like a Jerk, I Only Care About Helping You: Picture Perfect (1997)

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For more superheroes, go to But If Any of It Fell Into the Wrong Hands…:Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II, Secret of the Ooze (1991)

But If Any of It Fell Into the Wrong Hands…:Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II, Secret of the Ooze (1991)

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But if any of it fell into the wrong hands… I’m well aware of the risks.

So now we come to our last Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle review of Horrorfest V. Will they be back next year? I don’t know. But for now, let’s get this review on the road.

startrekletsgetstarted

If you’ve been following me you’ve read this already, but for the new readers I’m giving a little background as to why I choose a TMNT film. If you have seen it already, feel free to skip ahead

So this is our third installment of four reviews of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ films.

Double double yay

So I know those of you who haven’t been following me, and have stumbled upon this post are probably really confused. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? As a horror film? NO WAY.

crazy

I know you are all saying to yourselves, hey this is a superhero movie, not a horror film. Au contraire, you see the turtles are radioactively enhanced to be larger; agile, smarter, etc. In fact the only thing that separates them from other radioactively changed creatures: such as the ants in Them, the giant spider in the Tarantula, or even Godzilla. They choosing to use their abilities for good and be superheroes doesn’t change the fact of how they were made.

So there! tongue sticking out pug

This Post We Are Switching Things UP!!

So I started Horrorfest V with the 2014 live action film, and worked backwards to the 2007 animated version.  The former had a Frankenstein-like quality and the latter had monsters. I decided to skip Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993) when they travel back in time to Japan, and went with the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)Now we are going to look into the sequel where we get the turtles backstory along with more mutated creatures.

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So we saw a big shift with this film. Because of complaints about violence, the film was lighter than the original and the turtles hardly use their weapons. Casey Jones was seen as “too violent” and his character replaced by one of the turtle stuntmen actors, Ernie Reyes Jr., being the teenager Keno.

They also had a bit of a fight over the story. The comic book writers wanted them to follow their stories, like the first film did, while the TV execs wanted them to follow the TV as that was more mainstream and child friendly. What we have is a combination of the two, with elements from both.

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After their battle with the Foot clan, the Turtles found themselves homeless. April took them in, and they have been living in her apartment since then, off of a lot of pizza delivery.

Pizza Delivery Sabrina the teenage witch

Pizza delivery boy, Keno, is out dropping off his pizza’s when he comes across a burglary.

Not good

Not good

Keno: Hold it! You guys are under arrest.

Burglar: What are you, night security?

Keno: No, I’m a pizza delivery.

[the gang laugh and attack, and Keno easily kicks their butts]

Keno: Did I mention I also study the martial arts?

But even with that, Keno is no match for their numbers. Luckily he has a a certain, special crew looking out for him.

But Keno has seen them, and four giant turtles is something he won’t forget easily.

AMAZING!

AMAZING!

Back at the house the turtles get into am argument over whether to stay hidden or reveal themselves. Raphael is eager to be “out of the shadows”.

Couldn't resist

Couldn’t resist

Splinter: Their world can never be ours.

Michaelangelo: Uh… Not even pizza?

Splinter: [after pause] Pizza’s okay.

[the turtles sigh with relief]

Michaelangelo: Man, give a guy a heart attack.

Meanwhile, Tatsu has grabbed the remaining members of the Foot and have them situated in a junkyard to regroup. He is planning on taking lead control of the Foot, when he is interrupted.

The Shredder

The Shredder

OMG gasp

Yes Shredder lived! And he is back with a deep rooted vengeance and a thirst for blood. Turtle blood.

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So April is out reporting on Techno Global Research Industries (TGRI) as they are doing a cleanup of a few spilled canisters. April feels as if there is more to the story, but she can’t get anything else out of Professor Jordan Perry.

irongiantreallyhmmokayyeahright

After she is gone, Professor Perry reveals there is a lot more going on.

[after being given a giant mutated dandelion]

Professor Jordan Perry: You know, if the soil’s contaminated so far away, there must be more leaky canisters than we thought.

TGRI Assisstant #1: Well, how can that be? They were only buried fifteen years ago.

Professor Jordan Perry: Fifteen, fifty. Just make sure that the rest are found and removed!

TGRI Assistant #1: Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to invite the press.

Professor Jordan Perry: Sometimes the best place to hide is right out in public.

TGRI Assisstant #1: But if any of it fell into the wrong hands…

[Perry looks as giant dandelion]

Professor Jordan Perry: I’m well aware of the risks.

And unbeknownst to them, April’s new camera guy is watching.

stock-hiding-behind-bush-2

And he’s not just a reporter who has stumbled onto this story; but a member of the Foot.

Not good

Not good.

When Shredder finds out about this, he wants Dr. Perry as he has a plan.

evillaugh

Back with the turtles, they have been watching the report and fighting whether to continue or watch something new. Splinter comes in, and when he sees the report reveals something the Turtles never expected…that company was the one that created/housed the mutagen that made them all.

WHAT!

WHAT!

They decide they need to find Dr. Perry and find out the answers to their questions, and to why or how they were created.

igotstoknow

Both groups head down to TGRI, after the Dr. and the last canister of mutagen.

scientisttgriteenagemutantninjaturtle

They all fight, but Shredder makes off with both prizes.

notenoughChamomileTeaStopRage

When they return to the apartment, they have another surprise. Keno has come to “deliver pizzas” but in reality to track down these things he saw. And what he sees is a shock.

[about to leave April’s apartment, having seen Raph’s foot pretruding from behind the changing curtain and becoming suspicious about their weapons “she” has lying around]

Keno: One last thing, though. I think you might want to know about THIS! [slams his foot on Raph’s]

Raphael: ARGH! [Raph comes out from behind the curtain]

Keno: It’s you guys!

Raphael:[cluthching his foot and being held back by Donny, Leo, and MikeyAh, ah! Let me hurt him. Please! Tell me I can hurt him! Please, please! Grr!

[Splinter puts his hand on Keno’s shoulder]

Splinter: I think you’d better sit down.

[Keno sees Splinter and faints]

After Keno wraps his head around what is going on, he wants to help. He tells them how the Foot are recruiting people and that maybe he should go down and be a spy for them. This is rejected by Leonardo as he knows that if Keno, a pizzaguy, found them, then the Foot will be there soon. It is time to find a new home.

However, Raphael doesn’t always listen to Leo, and he and Keno come up with a plan.

IndianaJonesHmmMaybe

Meanwhile, Shredder is trying to force Dr. Perry to redo the mutation that happened to the turtles. He wants a duo of monsters that he can control and unleash on the turtles. His crew searched all New York, and all they could get was a wolf and a snapping turtle. Dr. Perry continues the experiment and they become Tokka and Rahzar.

tokka-and-rahzar-teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles

These took place of Rocksteady and Bebop, the mutated Rhino and Warthog.

But while these are gruesome creations, they aren’t exactly what the Shredder wanted.

And they unleash him out in the city.

The turtles, san Raphael, have found a new home in an abandoned subway area. They head out to try and help the city while Keno and Raphael try to infiltrate the Foot. They pass the tests and Keno is in, but then Raphael is captured by the Foot.

1Star-Wars-Luke-NOOO-Not-my-father

Keno escapes and warns the turtles who head out to the junkyard.

There they meet Tokka and Rahzar and discover that while they are babies, they have recived a higher dose of the mutagen and are much stronger. They save Dr. Perry and head back to their new home.

Back at their place, Donatello questions Dr. Perry about the mutagen and finds out it was an accident. This upsets him as he thought, maybe, there was more to why they were created.

Splinter: What troubles you, my son?

Donatello: I-I don’t know. I just thought there would be more to it; to the ooze, to you know, us!

Leonardo: I know!

Donatello: I just always thought there would be something that… I thought we’d find out we were special.

Splinter: Do not confuse the professor’s words with your current worth, my son.

Donatello: But I don’t believe him! There’s just got to be more to it!

But soon, they must focus to the task at hand. Shredder has given April a message, the Turtles must fight Tokka and Rahzar that night, or else they will be unleashed in Central Park. They are now on a timeline and must work quickly to figure out a way to stop them.

suspicious Hmm

They discover that the creatures must eat their antidote and Michelangelo comes up with the idea to infuse donuts with them.

They try their plan out, but things do not go right.

They end up breaking a club wall and take the fight to the dance floor, music by Vanilla Ice.

Shredder has drinken the last of the serum and mutated gimself.

Is the Shredder dead? Never! You can never stop him!

Back at home Splinter asks about the fight. The turtles try to hide some of the events, but the people of New York saw a LOT.

Splinter: Were you seen?

Leonardo: Of course not, Master Splinter.

Donatello: We practiced Ninja.

Michaelangelo: [off camera] The art of invisibility.

[Splinter appears from behind RaphSplinter: [holds up the New York Post, with a front page picture of the turtles on stage, with the headline “Ninja Rap is Born!”] Practice harder.

[the turtles groan]

Splinter: Ten flips, now! And remember: “Go Ninja, go Ninja, go!” I made another funny! Ha ha ha ha!

TheEnd_Title_2

A fantastic film, and the last of our series. And because I just love this guys I decided I just had to be one for Halloween.

turtle

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Man, I love being a turtle!

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To start Horrorfest V from the beginning, go to Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

For the previous post, go to I Can Make You all Go Away! Any Time I Want To!: Charlie X, Star Trek (1966)

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For more on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, go to I Came Upon a Shattered Glass Jar and Four Baby Turtles Crawling into a Strange Glowing Ooze: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)

For more on creating monsters, go to You Cannot Conquer It. It has Conquered You!: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931)

For more films based on books, go to It was a Horseman, a Dead One. Headless: Sleepy Hollow (1999)

I Came Upon a Shattered Glass Jar and Four Baby Turtles Crawling into a Strange Glowing Ooze: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)

TMNT

One day, I came upon a shattered glass jar and four baby turtles…The little ones were crawling into a strange glowing ooze from a broken canister nearby. I gathered them up in an old coffee can and when I awoke the next morning, I received a shock. For they had doubled in size. I, too, was growing. 

If you’ve been following me you’ve read this already, but for the new readers I’m giving a little background as to why I choose a TMNT film. If you have seen it already, feel free to skip ahead

So this is our third installment of four reviews of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ films.

Double double yay

So I know those of you who haven’t been following me, and have stumbled upon this post are probably really confused. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? As a horror film? NO WAY.

crazy

I know you are all saying to yourselves, hey this is a superhero movie, not a horror film. Au contraire, you see the turtles are radioactively enhanced to be larger; agile, smarter, etc. In fact the only thing that separates them from other radioactively changed creatures: such as the ants in Them, the giant spider in the Tarantula, or even Godzilla. They choosing to use their abilities for good and be superheroes doesn’t change the fact of how they were made.

So there! tongue sticking out pug

This Post We Are Switching Things UP!!

So I started Horrorfest V with the 2014 live action film, and worked backwards to the 2007 animated version.  The former had a Frankenstein-like quality and the latter had monsters. Instead of doing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993) when they travel back in time to Japan, I’ve decided we are going to the film that started it all.

TMNT

The 1990 version. This version doesn’t have as many horror elements as the others, but mutated creatures are still mutated creatures. And that counts!

So shall we wait any further? Or

DeanSupernaturalLetsGetStarted

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So I was a gigantic fan of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, especially the first two. My sister, friends, and I used to always act out the films or create our own stories.

TMNT

The film tried to stay true to the comic series, rather than the TV show; from backstories, to lighting, to introductions, etc.

The craziest thing for me to wrap my head around was how no one wanted to make it. It was supposed to be done in the ’80s before the TV show, but financing always fell through. In fact, it was done by a new company and is one of the most productive independent films ever made.

What?

What?

And almost everyone, from writers, producers, Judith Hoag (April O’Neil), Jim Hensen, etc; complained that this film was too dark and too violent. That’s just crazy to me.

TMNT2

They were a tremendous part of my childhood and I can’t wait to share it with you. So no use waiting around anymore:

DeanSupernaturalLetsGetStarted

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TMNT

So the film begins with April O’Neil giving a report for Channel 3 news about the recent crime wave that has been occurring in New York City. Everything from purse snatching, to breaking & entering, etc. But the strangest thing? No one even seems to get a view of them. They are like a blink of an eye, a ninja.

April O’Neil: But whoever is behind these crimes, one thing is certain, these are much than just a series of random isolated incidents. Crimes without criminals? An invisible gang at work? Who are we gonna call? Unfortunately the police are the only ones to combat what some are already dubbing the silent crime wave. But perhaps the most disturbing silence is that coming from city hall. April O’Neill, Channel 3 Eyewitness News.

While April’s reporting is good for her viewers, it doesn’t make her any friends in city hall or the police station.

Not good

Not good

 

One night when April is heading home, she is walking past an alley when she sees some teenagers stealing from a van. They chase after her and pin her to the ground when the lights go out.

Never a good sign.

Never a good sign.

We hear some buttkicking, and when the lights come back on, the guys are tied up and April is fine.

WOW

WOW

But there is no one there? Who did this?

April finds a sai and takes it before the police can see it. She is being watched by a figure who realizes that he left his sai behind.

clueless mybad oops

We then head down to the sewers and get our first look at the brothers and their father/instructor, Splinter:

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And when I first saw them as a kid I was amazed at how lifelike and incredible they look. That’s what’s wrong with a lot of CGI, it just doesn’t feel real, it doesn’t take space or have weight. These felt real, they were just incredible.

OMG gasp

The turtles took multiple people doing the face, body, and voice; and were created by Jim Henson. They were the most advanced he had ever worked with; made out of fiberglass and foam rubber latex. They took 18 weeks to make. Incredible.

Splinter had three puppeteers; one for the face, one for the arms, and the puppet himself.

AMAZING!

AMAZING!

So the four boys: Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello, and Raphael; return home to tell their master what happened.

Leonardo: We have had our first battle, Master Splinter! They were many, but we kicked… but we fought well.

Splinter: Were you seen?

Leonardo: Uh-uh.

Splinter: In this, you must never lapse. Even those who would be our allies, would not understand. Our domain is the shadow; stray from it reluctantly, for when you do, you must strike hard and fade away, without a trace.

Raphael: I lost a sai!

Splinter: Then, it is gone.

Raphael: But I can get it back! I can get it back…

Splinter: Raphael!… Let it go.

Done with work, time for a reward. And you know what the TMNT’s favorite thing to have is Pizza.

Pizza Delivery Sabrina the teenage witch

Raphael is upset and heads out to a movie, dressed up in a trench coat and hat. Donatello and Michelangelo wait for their delivery.

And the turtles enjoy their favorite snack:

TMNTteenage_mutant_ninja_turtles_movie

PIZZA!!!

Raphael goes to see Critters which he hates and stumbles upon some thugs who snatch a ladies purse. There he meets Casey Jones, sports vigilante.

Casey grew up watching all kinds of cop shows and decided to become a vigilante. I thought he was one of the coolest, apart from the turtles, and one of my favorite characters.

If he existed.

If he existed.

So he and Raphael fight about who’s right about how to treat the thugs. When Casey knocks Raphael into a garbage can, he takes off and Raphael heads off for home.

The next day, April goes to the police to report what happened, but the chief isn’t much help as he hates the way she showed him on TV. Well maybe you should stop acting so much like bumbling fool and do your job.

stupidmoranhmm_yes_i_see_youre_a_moron_trollcat

She then goes to the subway to go home when she is approached by the gang, the Foot. They warn her about her mouth and start to attack her, knocking her out, but are stopped by Raphael who has been following April in hopes to get her sai back. When he finishes the Foot off and sees a knocked out April, there is only one thing he can do. Bring her back to his home.

uh-no-gifuhno

I know bad idea, but what else can he do. It’s not like he can drop her off at a hospital or something, and its not like he can leave her there.

Leonardo: [Raphael has brought an unconscious April O’Neil into the sewer] Are you crazy?

Raphael: Yeah, Leo, I’m crazy, OK? A loony, OK?

Donatello: But why?

Raphael: Why? Why, oh I don’t know, ’cause I wanted to redecorate. You know, a couple of throw pillows, a TV news reporter, what do ya think?

And when she wakes up, she has the appropiate response to seeing four, life-size talking turtles and a rat.

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But they are able to calm her down and get her to listen to their story.

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Can we take a moment and pause to talk about Splinter. Now in real life I hate rats. I think they are disgusting and ugly.

ew! Gross Yuck

I hated the new version of Splinter too as he was horrifying, fake looking, and mean. But this Splinter is perfect, he is friendly, kind, cuddly, adorable.

You're so cute

Sorry for that tangent, let’s get back to the film.

The turtles take April home, and she invites them in for their favorite thing:

April O’Neil: I’d like to invite you all in but I really don’t have anything to offer you guys except for some… frozen pizza.

Michaelangelo: [springs up from the manhole like a jack-in-the-box] Let’s go for it!

Donatello: You said the magic word.

April O’Neil: You guys eat pizza?

MichaelangeloDonatello: Doesn’t everybody?

April O’Neil: Um, yeah… alright.

Leonardo: [from below] Hey, did she say pizza?

Pizzaiseternal

When the turtles return home, they find their home burglarized and Splinter gone!

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With nowhere else to turn they stay with April in her apartment over and old antique shop.

Meanwhile, April’s boss Charles’ son Danny has just been released from jail for stealing. The Chief has promised to keep it off the record if he can keep April off his back.

Mmhm great gatsby

Charles goes to talk with April, who is housing 4 giant turtles

No thank youhowaboutno

Charles tries to talk to April but she doesn’t really listen and she plans to continue with her story.

Meanwhile, Danny takes off when his dad tries to talk to him about stealing and heads to a secret teen hideout. It like a gang, at first everything seems fun with skateboarding, video games, etc.; but turns darker as they are expected to steal and eventually the best of the best are chosen to join the Foot clan. The hideout is run by the second-in-command, Tatsu; while the leader is Shredder.

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Shredder used to terrify me as a child. He hardly says anything but he has those cold, cruel eyes, and that steely voice. Frightening.

I'm getting shivers

I’m getting shivers

I think the scariest thing about him too is how little he cares for anyone else. He practically kills a guy in here and has done some sick, crazy things in the past. He is a complete psychopath that cares about achieving his goals; and if you get in the way…well he is called Shredder for a reason.

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So back at the apartment, the turtles are watching April’s newscast. Afterwards Leonardo and Raphael argue about what to do next, Raphael thinking they should find the Foot and get some answers, Leonardo think they should wait until April picks up on something. Leo says some horrible things about how they don’t need him and Raphael goes upstairs to the roof to workout his frustration.

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The foot has tracked them down and approach the house as April arrives home. Downstairs April shows off the antiques, while Raphael gets pummeled. He comes falling through the roof and the fights escalate, until Casey shows up to lend a hand.

The hockey mask wearing and weapon wielding type of guy you want to see.

The hockey mask wearing and weapon wielding type of guy you want to see.

“Casey Jones: [to the Foot soldiers of Raph] You guys mind telling me what you’re doing to my little green pal over there, hm? [sees AprilOh, who is the babe?

Leonardo: Who the heck is that?

Michaelangelo: Wayne Gretzky on steroids?”

The building catches fire and the turtles and April escape in a secret tunnel. As they exit the building, Casey is the last one out and hears a message left by April’s boss:

As they leave we spot Danny watching the building fro afar, he is the one who betrayed them.

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They drive out to a farmhouse in more rural New York, also left to April. Raphael remains motionless while Leonardo tries to help him. The rest try to concentrate on doing something, anything but all the questions constantly bombard them. What to do? Is Splinter okay? Is he alive? Will Raphael recover?

I don't know what to do

Back in the city, Shredder has the whole Foot searching for the turtles. Something about the way they fight is so familiar, reminds him of the past…he also has them searching for Danny as he too has disappeared.

On the farm, Raphael has reawaken!

Leonardo: [sees that Raphael is awake and rushes to him] Raph! You’re awake! How do you feel?

Raphael: What’s a guy gotta do… to get some food around here?

Leonardo: [stands up, ecstatic, and runs to bathroom door] Hey! Hey, he’s awake! He wants some food! Bring some food! [runs back to RaphaelYou’re gonna be ok Raph… you’re gonna be ok!

Raphael: Yeah, yeah, alright Leo! Get a grip, will ya?

Leonardo: Listen, Raph…[helps Raphael to his feet]-about what I said before… y’know… about not needing you and all?

Raphael: Leo… don’t. [They hug]

Leonardo: Boy, we missed you.

Donatello: [he and April watch from the doorway] It’s a Kodak moment.

They let Raphael build up his strength, while Leo tries to contact Splinter through meditation. He feels him and has his brothers go off into the woods to join him. There they hear Splinter speak and are ready to head back to the city.

Let's Do IT!

Let’s Do IT!

The turtles return home and find Danny hiding out there. They don’t know he was the one who lead Shredder to them, and warmly welcome him. Casey is claustrophobic, as decides to stay in the truck, above ground.

Even though Danny doesn’t like the Foot clan, once you are in a gang it is hard to get out. He returns and finds Splinter, hearing his story pre-turtles

Splinter: I too once had a family, Danny. Many years ago I lived in Japan: a pet of my master Yoshi, mimicking his movements from my cage and learning the mysterious art of Ninjitsu, for Yoshi was one of Japan’s finest shadow warriors. His only rival was a man named Oroko Saki, and they competed in all things, but in nothing more fiercely than for the love of a woman, Tang Shen. Shen’s love was only for my master and rather than see him fight Saki for her hand, she persuaded Yoshi to flee with me to America. But Saki vowed vengeance. I remember it well, as my master returned home to find his beloved Shen lying on the floor, and then he saw her killer. Saki wasted no words, and during the struggle, my cage was broken. I leapt to Saki’s face, biting and clawing, but he threw me to the floor and took one swipe with his Katana, slicing my ear. Then he was gone, and I was alone.

Danny: What became of this Oroku Saki?

Splinter: Nobody really knows… But you wear his symbol.

OMG gasp

It’s the…

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His psychopath levels have just increased a thousand percent.

Shredder appears and removes a drawing of the turtles done by April. He leaves to gather troops and sends Tatsu back to kill Splinter.

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Danny heads back to help Splinter, and runs into Casey. They manage to get him out in time.

The Foot go out to fight Splinter, but are surprised by the turtles. Back in the hideout, Tatsu and Casey fight, with Casey defeating him. Afterwards, he talks to the group and asks if this is the kind of “family” they want.

Gang Leader: We have a loyalty to the Shredder.

Splinter: The Shredder uses you. He poisons your minds to obtains for that which he desires. He cares nothing for you or the people you hurt.

Gang Leader: We’re family.

Casey Jones: Family? Did you say family? You call this here and that…[points to Tatsu, who he just knocked out]…down there, family?

If only it was that easy in real life.

After the Turtles defeat a group of ninjas, they all step aside for Shredder.

Yes, Splinter is like the animal version of Mr. Miyagi. And he rocks!

But is the Shredder dead? Or is he like every other horror villain? they always come back.

Terminatorillbeback

April has her story, the police stop the gang, Casey has April and the turtles celebrate their family and victory!

Leonardo: We were awesome!

Michaelangelo: Bodacious!

Raphael: B******’!

Donatello: Uh…

Michaelangelo: Gnarly!

Leonardo: Radical!

Raphael: Totally tubular, dude!

Michaelangelo: Wicked!

Leonardo: Hellacious!

Donatello: Uh, mega…

Splinter:[Splinter clears his throat, the Turtles clam up] I have always liked… Cowabunga.

LeonardoMichaelangeloRaphaelDonatello: COWABUNGA!

Splinter: [laughs] I made a funny!

And there is only one way to end a turtle film, in SONG!

Well that’s the awesomeness of the turtles. It was perfect and I just:

loveitSupernatural

Before we end, I have one more little Turtle delight for you:

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To start Horrorfest V from the beginning, go to Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

For the previous post, go to A Murder Has Been Committed on Your Property: Death Comes to Pemberley, Episode One (2013)

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For more Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, go to Every Three Thousand Years, the Stars Align. Unleashing an Army of Monsters: TMNT (2007)

For more Nostalgia Critic, go to Fanning All Over the Place