The Star of India | janeaustenrunsmylife

“It’s Mrs. Archer. She’s on a rampage. We’ve got to warn the town.”

Before Fatal Attraction came out in the ’80s, this was the film that taught you cheating on your wife was a bad idea. A really bad idea. Now this B horror film, really is a B film in my opinion. It’s worth a watch at least once in your lifetime, not something I’d want see again and again. In fact the 50 foot woman, Nancy Archer, doesn’t have much to say or any real character development besides revenge on her husband, but that is one of the reasons why you like it. Like I said, a good watch but probably not one that is marathon worthy.

So the film starts of with rich, socialite, Nancy Fowler Archer. Nancy is depressed and distraught. Her husband Harry is a no good, cheating, loser. But she loves him, so she took him back.

She gets wasted and becomes depressed, deciding to search for Harry. As she is driving through the desert she overhears a radio broadcast about aliens. Just then a huge object drops down on the highway and causes her car to swerve. She gets out of the car, when a huge hand comes at her.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She escapes from the hand, running away.

Meanwhile, in Tony’s Bar & Grill, is her jerk of a husband with the gold digging…

Honey Parker. Ugh.

Harry had left his wife, but instead of working when he was strapped for cash, he went crawling back to be taken care of. Nancy Archer is worth over $50 million, but with divorce Harry won’t be able to get a thing. Honey tells him that he’d be able to get it all IF his wife dies.

Harry is a bit perturbed by that suggestion, and decides to try to recommit Nancy.

Nancy has arrived in town, and is intercepted by Deputy Charlie. She is freaking out over the alien encounter, but everyone thinks she’s crazy. The Sheriff tries to clear the crowd, and protect Nancy from onlookers as she is a prominent figure in the community.

Nancy tries to tell everyone all that happened, but no one will listen.

Deputy Charlie goes searching for Harry and finds him making out with Honey in a booth. Harry pays him to “not be found”. Charlie goes back to the deputy and they go looking for “the giant”.

Pretty much they think she is crazy and are just humoring her.

Of course, they find nothing. Nancy is furious and heads home. There she runs into Jess, the butler, and Harry. She sends Jess away and gets started on another drink. She and Harry start fighting about his cheating and her drinking.

They fight and fight. But ultimately, Nancy can’t get rid of him. She’s crazy about him, no matter how bad he makes her feel.

Nancy Archer: My husband!… My gigolo! That’s what you are. You’re a miserable parasite! You’re just after my money! I was rid of you once. Why did I take you back? Why? Why?

Harry Archer: Why did you, Nancy?

Nancy Archer: Why?… because I love you, Harry!

Poor Nancy. She is stuck in this horrible marriage because she can’t let go.

She tells Harry about the spaceship, but surprise, surprise; he thinks she’s crazy too. He puts her to bed giving her a sedative to knock her out. He then steals her diamond pendant, Star of India, and head’s over to see Honey.

When he gets to the bar he finds Honey with deputy Charlie. She’s angry about having to wait around while he’s with his wife.

He gives her the diamond to mollify her.

Dr. Isaac Cushing makes a house call on Nancy, and confirms she is not well at all. When the doctor leaves, Harry and Nancy resume their fight. Harry gives her back the diamond and leaves her alone. And them to make matters worst, the radio makes fun of her “encounter”.

KRKR-TV Commentator: Ladies and gentlemen, this is KRKR-TV. And now, more news of high fliers. Nancy Archer, the former Nancy Fowler, heiress to the Fowler fortune and the fabulous Star of India diamond, has joined the ever expanding international society of satellite seers. From the Archer’s palatial home away from home comes word that Mrs. Archer claims not only to be seeing a sociable satellite, but its inhabitant as well, a 30-foot giant. Is he pink with big ears and tusks? It seems that Mrs. Archer, who has been feuding with her husband, Handsome Harry, has finally found a man from out of this world, someone who will love her for herself. Come, come, Mrs. Archer. Any man can ignore a million dollars, but fifty million? That’s too much to ask for, even from the man in the moon.

She destroys her radio with an empty bottle. This brings Jess and Harry into the room. Nancy orders Harry to come with her to search the desert. They drive for hours and find nothing. That night, however, Nancy sees a flash of light and follows it. They spot the ship, with Nancy going up to it, estatic that she isn’t crazy. As she is looking at it, the Giant alien comes out again and reaches toward her.

Harry fires at the giant with his gun, but it does nothing. Nancy screams for help from Harry, but he takes off in the car leaving her behind.

When he gets to the house, Jess asks him where Nancy is. He ignores him and continues packing things. The two start fighting, when Harry knocks him back with an empty bottle. He takes off to the hotel, where Honey is waiting.

He pushes Honey to hurry up and get stuff together. While he ran to Honey, Jess called the sheriff with his suspicions about Nancy and Harry. When Honey and Harry are about to leave, they are stopped by Charlie. Charlie is offered a bribe again, but refuses, taking them down to the station.

While the two are stuck at the office, the sheriff and a posse start searching for Nancy. Eventually she is found at the pool house. Everyone is taken to the house, where Dr. Cushing attends Nancy. He is concerned about blue-green scratches on her neck, that they might have radiation. He asks Harry where they were, but he tells her that he doesn’t know where she was as he was with Honey the whole time. Honey confirms this, but the sheriff warns them not to leave town. He finds the whole thing very suspicious.

As Harry takes Honey home, Honey tells him that she overheard the doctor say that an overdose would kill her. She pushes him, and Harry is planning on it.

Can we just pause and say that Honey is a regular psychopath. She’s got the touch of the crazy in her.

That night he waits until the nurse is asleep, and fills a syringe. As he goes to inject her, the nurse wakes up and catches him. But before they can address that, she screams for the doctor as something has happned to Nancy.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She is ginormous!!!!!!

What’s going on?

The next day, doctors come but no one can figure out what caused this growth!

At the hotel Honey is messing with records. She is not happy that Nancy is still alive, but there is nothing that he can do with all the doctors swarming.

Back at the house, the police are searching for the reason why Nancy grew. They find a gigantic footprint. They find several more and follow it to the desert, concluding that the giant must have brought her back to the house. They find the spaceship and fight with the alien. He leaves in his ship, after having destroyed the car and causing the Sheriff and Jess to walk home.

At home Nancy wakes up, and is very unhappy that Harry is not there. Deputy Charlie tries to get Harry to come home, but he refuses. They try to keep Nancy doped up, but she breaks free, makes an outfit out of her bedsheets, and takes off searching for Harry.

She knows he’s with Honey and takes off after them.

Nancy Archer: I know where my husband is! He’s with that woman!

The doctors and sheriff follow her trek and mass destruction. Just like every other giant being, Nancy takes out buildings, the electrical transmission tower, etc. She keeps yelling Harry! and looking for him.

She eventually finds the two in the hotel.

Harry tries to shoot Nancy, but it doesn’t stop her. Nancy knocks the roof off the building and kills Honey. She picks up Harry, crushing him in her grasp. The sheriff finally kills Nancy, by using a transformer which electrocutes the two. In an ending that is reminiscent of King Kong (1933), they crowd gathers around and end the film with, “