Suspense & Sensibility (Or First Impressions Revisited)

Suspense and Sensibility (Or First Impressions Revisited) by Carrie Bebris

So a while back I reviewed a Jane Austen mystery, Pride and Prescience (Or a Truth Universally Acknowledged).  I enjoyed  the first book, although I did solve the mystery quickly, but it was very well written and worth reading.

So while the first book focused only on Pride & Prejudice characters (and ones she made up) this one combines P&P with Sense and Sensibility.

A mashup

Sense and Sensibility actually takes place in the 1790s, twenty years before Pride and Prejudice. All the characters have been aged accordingly so they match up with the Pride and Prejudice ones. It can be a bit confusing when the characters are no longer how they were in their book.  To make it less confusing, I will give a brief reminder of the plot of Sense & Sensibility.

So the Dashwood family:

The estate of Norland belongs to Old Mr. Dashwood. When he was sick he was visited by his family and found young Henry Dashwood, John’s son, to be just so adorable that he entailed it to the men in his family. After he died Mr. Henry Dashwood, the elder, ended up dying and the estate passed over his second wife and daughters going to his son John, (which would ultimately go to his son, young Henry.)

John promised his father to help his sisters, but with an ambitious wife; that quickly ended.

John’s wife is horrible, just evil. Fanny, the demon wife, convinces John to give no money to the sisters as they really “are not his siblings”. She then rearranges the whole household and makes life unbearable for all.

John also has an incredibly bratty son, Henry:

When Fanny’s brother visits, she sees that he and Elinor like each other, but as Elinor is too poor for her soon to be wealthy brother Edward, she ends that immediately. The second Dashwood family all move from their home to renting out Barton’s Cottage, owned by Sir John Middleton, Mrs. Dashwood’s cousin.

They spend a lot of time with Sir John, as he constantly invites them over so that they can eat well, as money is extremely tight. Eventually after all kinds of twists and turns, the two eldest girls marry the men of their dreams and the story ends happily. If you haven’t read it you should.

**Spoilers**

So Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth, Georgiana, and Kitty are all heading to London for a “London Season” as they are husband hunting for Kitty. They are invited to Sir John’s where they meet him and his wife (sadly I think Mrs. Jennings the mother-in-law has passed on) and their now adult children. Also there is the young Mr. Henry Dashwood, who is now no longer a boy, but a young man in his twenties. He meets Kitty and immediately finds her to be a fantastic partner, good conversationalist, and all around enjoys her company.

Only one problem, he thought she was Georgiana Darcy.

The next day it seems as if all the men were only interested in Georgiana, not Kitty, as she is going to bring an extremely large dowry.

Except for Mr. Henry Dashwood. After he discovered his blunder, he still spent the night with Kitty and fell for her. That works perfectly with Kitty as she has fallen head over heels for him.

While everyone finds him agreeable, and Elizabeth definitely thinks that he will be a good match for Kitty; Mr. Darcy thinks of him as a fop and a dandy wanting Kitty with someone who has more brains.

He goes to talk to Henry, and discovers that his lack of business isn’t from him not caring, but from not being instructed on how to run an estate. It turns out that his parents sent him away to school immediately and he has spent hardly any time with family or at Norland. However, he is eager to learn and Darcy soon takes him under his wing.

Henry has won over the whole family, but soon Fanny arrives to meet Kitty.

Here I am!

Fanny does not like Kitty as she is too poor and would rather spear Georgiana with her impressive dowry. But Henry will not be deterred, as he invites them to his 21st birthday and proposes to Kitty.

Everything seems to be going well, until Henry finds an old strange mirror and a painting of his notorious great-great uncle Sir Francis Dashwood. Soon after Henry starts acting completely different-gambling nonstop, drinking, carousing with all women (married and single of every class). What could have happened to him to make him so much worse than his nefarious relation? Could he be possessed?

So what did I think? Did I like it?

No

I thought this book ran into a few problems and wasn’t as good as the first one.

1) Henry Dashwod was too likable.

So when you read Sense and Sensibility, you don’t like Henry. He is a total brat and completely annoying.

But in this book they made him tooo likable. This caused problems as that reading about his possession made it sad because you knew it wasn’t him, and this poor guy has lost everything.

Secondly, because he is so likable, you know that he isn’t the one doing all these horrible things and that something has caused him to have a personality shift. It wasn’t a real mystery, like in the first novel, as you weren’t sure if Caroline was hypnotized or going insane.

2) No Mystery

In the first book, Caroline starts acting weird after she was married. This makes us wonder is someone making her act this way like in Gaslight or is she actually going crazy?

Crazy eyes

Secondly, there are a multitude of suspects:

  1. Mr. Kendall– He could be trying to kill the Bingleys because of the money he feels that he has been cheated out of. He also could be trying to get rid of Caroline because of his daughter being thrown over. Remember, his daughter was with Caroline when her horse bolted.
  2. Mr. Hurst– If his debts are as extremely high as Elizabeth suspects, he might be trying to kill his relations off for money.
  3. Professor Randolph– Professor Randolph has been drifting from place to place as most don’t feel his studies are legitimate. Now that Caroline is crazy, he has room and board as the prime caretaker for Caroline. Maybe he is making her seem crazy, and could even be trying to make it look as if she set the fire, to only further cement Mr. Parrish’s need of him.
  4.  Mr. Parrish- He only married Caroline for her money and is trying to remove her from the picture. He is supposed to be extremely wealthy, but for some people what they have is never enough. Besides, he could be lying about how wealthy he is, or have hidden debt that they don’t know about.

In this however, we immediately know that Henry is being possessed as the writer gives it away in the beginning introduction and the back of the novel. Instead we are just waiting for events to unfold.

Yeah, I don’t like those kind of mysteries. That’s how Death Comes to Pemberley was (the book, not the TV miniseries. The miniseries is better.)

3) Hardly Any Elinor, Marianne, Colonel Brandon, or Edward In It

I’m sorry but I don’t know why they were missing so much in this novel. We LOVE this characters so if we are reading something to so with Sense and Sensibility we want to have then in the book. It was a crime to not have very much of them.

4) Supernatural Seems Like an Afterthought

This is a supernatural mystery (not Supernatural) but it takes a long time for the characters to reach that point and even evoke in anything. Professor Randolph is there for a second, and then the weirdest thing-the ever staunchly “realistic” Darcy decides to do battle with the demon mirror? I don’t know, it just seemed hastily thrown in, instead of carefully worked like in the previous book.

So we will see what the next book holds. Will it get better? Or worse?

There is one question though that this book presented that I think is worth mulling over. Who should Georgiana marry?

So I started thinking, out of all the non-attached Austen men, who would be the best match for Georgiana (yes I know the author might just make a new character like P.D. James did, but forget that lets focus on what Austen made.)? I narrowed it down to three characters who I think might work.

3) Colonel Fitzwilliam from Pride & Prejudice

Pros: Known Georgiana a long time, is kind, caring, funny, amiable, etc.

Cons: Is like a brother to Georgiana, she might not be able to see past that. She might also think he is too old (which he isn’t).

For more on Colonel Fitzwilliam, go to A Murder Has Been Committed on Your Property: Death Comes to Pemberley, Episode One (2013)

2) James Morland from Northanger Abbey

Pros: James is a kind, compassionate, caring, and hardworking guy. He has studied constantly and will soon be taking his orders to become a minister. He is a kind older brother and has many traits, in that respect, shared with her brother. Educated, well read, etc.

Cons: Not from a wealthy family, but still does alright; naive, and like Bingley, more easily persuaded.

1) Lieutenant William Price from Mansfield Park

This is actually my top pick, I think they would be good for each other. I just see them as being a great couple, him so sweet and gentle with fragile temperaments. Georgiana needing someone who can be kind and caring.

Pros: Kind, caring, compassionate, honest, and hardworking.

Cons: While his mother came from a high class family, she married down (although that wouldn’t really matter to Georgiana.) He is in the navy a peon, but he does get a great commission through Fanny’s connection to Henry Crawford.

For more on Lt. William Price, go to Let’s Hear it For the Boys

For more by Carrie Bebris, go to Pride & Prescience (Or a Truth Universally Acknowledged)

For more on Pride & Prejudice, go to Too Pretty

For more on Sense and Sensibility, go to What Would Jane Do?: Quips and Wisdom from Jane Austen

For more Pride & Prejudice variations, go to Whether Presentable or Not, I Love Spending Time With You: Episode Four, Pride and Prejudice (1995)

For more Sense and Sensibility variations, go to Baby Jane Austen

For more Jane Austen mysteries, go to Midnight in Austenland

For more books based on Jane Austen, go to Pride & Prejudice & Zombies

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Who You Gonna Call?: Ghostbusters (1984)

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Are you troubled by strange noises in the middle of the night? Do you experience feelings of dread in your basement or attic? Have you or your family ever seen a spook, specter or ghost? If the answer is “yes,” then don’t wait another minute. Pick up the phone and call the professionals…

So I know this is a little unusual to start Horrorfest off with as it isn’t a classic Horror film but instead a horror, comedy, & parody fusion. But it is one of my favorite movies, and as I was unable to review it last year; and adhering to my plan to be a little different and unusual this year; I thought it would be a great opening.

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So I just love everything about Ghostbusters. So much that last year I dressed up as one for Halloween. Sadly they don’t make the original costume (those new ones are ugly), in female form (except the stupid shorty mini skirts), so I had my own made. I even made my own pack.

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Pretty cool right?

Oh yeah!

Oh yeah!

So I can’t remember when I first really watched Ghostbusters. It seems like they have been part of my childhood for as long as I can remember. And I am such a hardcore fan, that I went to the rerelease in theaters, in full costume.

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It was hard picking a quote for the beginning of the review as there are just so many great ones:

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But I eventually went with the most famous one, although it is from the song, rather than the movie.

Anyways, that is enough of my back story for this post, let’s move on to the review!

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So the film was thought up by Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi. They envisioned Ghostbusters throughout the country, time, space, and even using wands.

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After Belushi’s death, the script was a bit reworked, and still sent out. Ivan Reitman liked the idea, but felt there needed to be a lot of changes and hired Harold Ramis to take it on.

Number two of the dream team obtained.

Number two of the dream team obtained.

A lot of the script was ad-libbed, especially Bill Murray’s part. I guess that is what happens when you get a bunch of comedians together.

They asked many people for different roles, but settled on Dan Aykroyd and Bill Murray. They wanted Eddie Murphy, but he declined for Beverly Hills Cop. But with his refusal they gained Ernie Hudson.

Number three locked on!

Number four locked on!

They wanted other actors to play Egon Spenglar, but when they just couldn’t find the right fit, they went with Harold Ramis. And the perfect quartet was born.

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So the film starts out in the New York Public library:

Me

But what should be nice time in a quiet space, turns paranormal as library books float throughout the area. And then, no NOT THE CARD CATALOGUE!!!

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Frightened and screaming, the librarian goes running, screaming. I have to admit that this is super creepy, I remember this freaking me out when I first watched this.

We then cut to our logo.

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So Dr. Peter Venkerman (Murray), Dr. Raymond Stanz (Ankroyd), and Dr. Egon Spengler (Raimis); all reside in the Paranormal Studies Department at the University.  Peter is currently working on an experiment with two students.

He is doing an experiment on ESP, but in reality is trying to get in the female student, Jennifer’s, pants.

But before he can make a serious move, Ray interrupts them with the news that there was a ghostly apparition at the library.

Ooooooooooooooooo!

Ooooooooooooooooo!

Now let me start and say how much I love Egon Spenglar. I just love how he is so nerdy, unemotional, and speaks in a monotone at every time and at every moment.

Peter Venkman: “Spengler, are you serious about actually catching a ghost?”

Egon Spengler: “I’m always serious.”

He makes me laugh so hard!

Laughter

They go there and question the librarians, Peter crossing the line a bit, but you know Peter:

“Dr. Peter Venkman: Back off man, I’m a scientist.”

They continue down to the area where they saw the “spector”. They collect ectoplasmic residue, with Peter still upset over missing his date for “ghost boogers”. Ew! All I can think of, being a librarian, is she got it all over the card catalog. It would take FOREVER to fix it all. Aw!!!

Aw, man.

Aw, man.

They continue on when they find symmetrical stacking, and are almost knocked over by a bookcase. (This was actually an accident and ad-libbed.)

They find the ghost, and at at first Peter tries to get her to calm down, sort of romancing her. She shushes them and when Ray tells them to go get her, but then they end up running away.

They head back to the college, Peter disgusted with Ray’s plan

Dr. Peter Venkman: Hee hee hee! “Get her!” That was your whole plan, huh, “get her.” Very scientific.

They return to the college to face bad news. They are fired by the university and the college is shutting that area of study down.

Reality Sucks

Egon takes it in stride like he always does, Peter is never serious, and Ray is heartbroken. But Peter has another idea:

Dr Ray Stantz: Personally, I liked the university. They gave us money and facilities. We didn’t have to produce anything! You’ve never been out of college. You don’t know what it’s like out there. I worked in the private sector. They expect results.

Dr. Peter Venkman: For whatever reasons, Ray. Call it fate. Call it luck. Call it karma. I believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe that we were destined to get thrown out of this dump.

Dr Ray Stantz: For what purpose?

Dr. Peter Venkman: To go into business for ourselves.

Dr Ray Stantz: [Ray thinks it over and takes a drink from Peter’s flask] This ecto containment system that Spengler and I have in mind is gonna require a load of bread to capitalize. Where are we gonna get the money?

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They end up mortgaging Ray’s house that was left to him by his parents. From there they go looking for places. Ray settles on an old firehouse

Dr. Peter Venkman: [evaluating a site for their businessWhat do you think, Egon?

Dr. Egon Spengler: I think this building should be condemned. There’s serious metal fatigue in all the load-bearing members, the wiring is substandard, it’s completely inadequate for our power needs, and the neighborhood is like a demilitarized zone.

Dr Ray Stantz: Hey. Does this pole still work? [slides down a fireman’s poleWow. This place is great. When can we move in? You gotta try this pole. I’m gonna get my stuff. Hey. We should stay here. Tonight. Sleep here. You know, to try it out.

[Venkman looks at Spengler. Spengler slowly shakes his head. Venkman turns to the real estate agentDr. Peter Venkman: I think we’ll take it.

Ray may be a super scientist, but he is a horrible negotiator. However, he has since made me want an old firehouse to convert.

Meanwhile, classical musician Dana Barrett is just about to discover something strange about her building. At first it seems normal…she is approached by her next door neighbor, Louis (Rick Moranis), who I think is absolutely hilarious. He is nerdy, an accountant, health foodie, and tries so hard to be liked by all.

“Louis: Listen, that reminds me, you shouldn’t leave your TV on so loud when you go out. The creep down the hall phoned the manager.

Dana Barrett: That’s strange, I didn’t realize I’d left it on. [unlocks her door]

Louis: [droning on] Well yeah, you know what I did? I climbed on the ledge and tried to disconnect the cable, but I couldn’t get in, so you know what I did? I turned my TV up real loud too so everyone would think all our TVs had something wrong with them.

Dana Barrett: [abruptly closing her door] Bye, Louis.

Louis: [alone again] Okay, so I’ll see you later, huh? I’ll give you a call! I’m going to go have a shower. [tries to go back into his apartment but he’s locked himself out]

Hmm, very odd, but Dana doesn’t really think about it. In fact she is distracted by the Ghostbusters’ commercial on TV.

I just LOVE this commercial, it is hilarious. You have Ray who is super gung-ho about it, Egon who has no social skills and sounds as if he is reading off a cue card, and Peter who doesn’t give a hoot. Hilarious!

Meanwhile, no one has been coming into Ghostbusters. Their secretary Janine does nothing all day but read.

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Sounds like a good job to me! But of course, the Ghostbusters don’t like it. They want clients!

Dr. Peter Venkman: Janine, any calls?

Janine Melnitz: No.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Any messages?

Janine Melnitz: No.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Any customers?

Janine Melnitz: No, Dr. Venkman.

Dr. Peter Venkman: It’s a good job, huh? [Janine smilesType something, will you? We’re paying for this stuff! And don’t stare at me, you got the bug-eyes…[pauseJanine, sorry about the bug-eyes thing. I’ll be in my office.

Janine enjoys the job for more than being able to read all day, she is in love with Egon. But as he is a typical nerd he has no clue.

Janine Melnitz: You’re very handy, I can tell. I bet you like to read a lot, too.

Dr. Egon Spengler: Print is dead.

Janine Melnitz: Oh, that’s very fascinating to me. I read a lot myself. Some people think I’m too intellectual but I think it’s a fabulous way to spend your spare time. I also play racquetball. Do you have any hobbies?

Dr. Egon Spengler: I collect spores, molds, and fungus.

Meanwhile, back to Dana. She has encountered her first foray with the supernatural. Her fridge has another world in it and is talking about Zhul. When she unpacks her groceries they are flying everywhere, the eggs cooking on the counter.

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She decides to see the Ghostbusters, but is a little weirded out by how unprofessional they seem. I mean they are sitting around eating Cheez-Its and Chunky bars.

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They check her out and when it appears that she has nothing do do with it; Egon decides to look up what Zhul means, Ray sets out to the Hall of Records to see if it has anything to do with the building; and Peter decides to head to the apartment.

Of course, Peter

Of course, Peter

While there he tries to put the moves on Dana, but she is too tough and is taking nothing from him. Peter looks the apartment over, not really knowing what he is doing, and there appears to be nothing supernatural at all.

weird

Later the crew are hanging out eating, and knowing that this is the end if they don’t get a paying client soon. Luckily they are saved by a call to get a ghost at the Sedgwick Hotel.

Janine Melnitz: [answers the phone] Hello, Ghostbusters… Yes, of course they’re serious… You do?… You have?… No kidding! Just gimme the address… Oh sure, they will be totally discreet. Thank you! [hangs upWE GOT ONE!

Double double yay

They head out to the hotel, the manager not at all pleased with how loud and brash they are. They pretend to be exterminators, but while they are heading up they realize they have never tested anything out.

Dr Ray Stantz: You know, it just occurred to me that we really haven’t had a successful test of this equipment.

Dr. Egon Spengler: I blame myself.

Dr. Peter Venkman: So do I.

Dr Ray Stantz: Well, no sense in worrying about it now.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back.

Oh geez

Oh geez

They turn everything on, but step away just in case the person blows up.

Please don't destroy us.

Please don’t destroy us.

Luckily no one dies and they go searching for the ghost, destroying everything along the way.

Egon just cracks me up, I cannot get enough of him.

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This is when the Ghostbusters first meet Slimer. Now I know a lot of people love him, but I have to admit I have always hated Slimer. I thought he was gross and disgusting, and such. Ugh, ultimate torture to be slimed by him.

Ew Yuck Gross

They do manage to get themselves together enough to capture the little booger.

After this, things start hitting the big time for the Ghostbusters, with them getting calls out of the wazoo.

This causes them to need extra help, hiring Winston Zeddermore, (Ernie Hudson). He’s just a regular guy like us all, and I think that makes him an even more enjoyable character. Just your average joe caught up in the paranormal.

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So in Egon’s research, he has found out some things on the architect of the building. He was involved with the occult, and a worshipper of Gozer, Zhul being a key part in this.

Peter decides that with this extra man, he can go see Dana; flirting with her.

Uh no.

Uh, no.

She’s not really interested, but does play along, agreeing to dinner.

Back at headquarters, they discover someone from the EPA, Walter Peck. He wants to study everything, but Peter pushes him off,  Peck threatening to come back with a court order.

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If that wasn’t enough, Egon thinks they might be having a problem with the spirit world.

Dr. Egon Spengler: I’m worried, Ray. It’s getting crowded in there and all my data points to something big on the horizon.

Winston Zeddemore: What do you mean, big?

Dr. Egon Spengler: Well, let’s say this Twinkie represents the normal amount of psychokinetic energy in the New York area. Based on this morning’s sample, it would be a Twinkie… thirty-five feet long, weighing approximately six hundred pounds.

Winston Zeddemore: That’s a big Twinke!

Meanwhile back at Dana’s place, Louis is having a party. He invites Dana, and is heartbroken to hear that she already has plans. She heads into her apartment and gets on the phone when she is attacked.

This scene used to creep me out so much as a kid, and it still is 100% freaky! Can you imagine having that happen to you?

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Meanwhile, at Louis’ party he invited just clients in order to write the whole thing off. His one date gets really bored, but he convinces her to stay. I can’t understand why he is trying so hard to win Dana when he has this blonde, supermodel type that loves him. People are weird

Anyways, Louis ends up being attacked and possessed by the other gargoyle dog, Zhul’s mate.

OMG gasp

When Peter returns for his date, their is no Dana, but Zhul. Zhul is the lock and is looking for the “keymaster” to wield “his key” and unlock her “gate”, allowing Gozer to walk about and take control of the Earth. I have to give them points for slipping that right past the kids. I never realized what Zhul was asking Peter until I was much older.

So Zhul wont let Peter in until he says he is the keymaster. And to be honest, I think if I was Peter I wouldn’t want to go in there. Possessed Dana is so creepy!

Gilmore girls creep

Peter calms her down by shooting her up with some drugs, weird how he was just carrying that around on his date…

Suspicious and kinda creepy.

Suspicious and kinda creepy.

So possessed Louis is wandering around looking for the gatekeeper. I love when he talks to the horse, just hilarious. The cops catch him and drop him off at Ghostbusters headquarters so they can deal with him.

To make things even more intense then dealing with two possessed people, a building that is a gateway for some serious paranormal activity, the dreaded Peck arrives. He wants to shut the grid off, and no convincing can stop him.

What a jerk! He doesn’t have any clue what will happen next and he does this.

Jerk

This causes a HUGE explosion, destroys the Ghostbusters Headquarters, sends Louis off as he has seen his sign, releases ghosts, and wakens Dana who destroys a section of her building to reach the top.

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All are arrested and while waiting, look at a blueprint, trying to get a plan together.

The are taken out of jail and are sent to see the mayor. Hopefully they can plead their case and get out of there.

Meanwhile, Louis and Dana have met up and the key has opened the lock.

dun-dun-duuuun

At the mayor’s office the Ghostbusters, Peck, and the mayor argue again and again. The mayor decides to side with the Ghostbusters and they head out.

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Everyone is cheering for them as they mug it up for the crowd, but soon they grow unahappy as they have to climb twenty-two flights of stairs to reach Dana’s apartment, the gateway.

Argh!!!

Argh!!!

They find a staircase and climb up. There they find Dana and Louis who have turned into the gargoyle dogs. Their transformation opens the temple doors and Gozer comes out.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Go get her, Ray!

Dr Ray Stantz: Gozer the Gozerian… good evening. As a duly designated representative of the City, County and State of New York, I order you to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to your place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension.

Dr. Peter Venkman: [Sarcastically] That oughta do it. Thanks very much, Ray.

Gozer: [to Ray] Are you a God?

Dr Ray Stantz[Ray looks at Peter, who nonchalantly nods yes] No.

Gozer: Then… DIE! [Lightning flies from her fingers, driving the Ghostbusters to the edge of the roof and almost off; people below scream]

Winston Zeddemore: Ray, when someone asks you if you’re a god, you say “YES”!

Dr. Peter Venkman: All right! This chick is TOAST!

They try to destroy her

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But she is too fast for them. Gozer has them choose the form that the destructor will be in. They all close their mind, buuut……..

And they save the day getting Dana and Louis out.

This is just a fantastic movie, hilarious, fun, and creepy, all the elements you want in a Halloween film. And of course that fantastic song. I cannot say enough just how awesome this film is.

And just a little extra fun!

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Well that’s our opening review! I hope you all enjoy it and keep coming back for more! And of course, a facebook banner. I make them every year and use them all October long!

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For more on Ghostbusters, go to When You Least Expect It

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For more ghosts, go to She Cries in the Night: The Screaming Skull (1958)

For more horror-comedy, go to I’m the Chosen One. And I Choose to be Shopping: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)

For more horror-parody, go to A Modern Mummy: Under Wraps (1997)

For more Nostalgia Critic, go to Return of the Fandom

Episode V: My Favorite Movie Lines Strike Back

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Here we are again! Another movie list! Hope You all enjoy it!

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401)”Henry: I feel as if my skin is the only thing keeping me from going everywhere at once.”–Ever After (1998)

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402)”Waldo Lydecker: In my case, self-absorption is completely justified. I have never discovered any other subject quite so worthy of my attention.”–Laura (1944)

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403)”John Ballantine: That Freud stuff’s a bunch of hooey.”–Spellbound (1945)

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404)”Doc: Your future hasn’t been written yet. No one’s has. Your future is whatever you make it. So make it a good one, both of you.!”–Back to the Future Part III (1990)

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405)”[after DaVinci opens a locked door by removing the pins from the hinges]
Louise: Why, that was pure genius!
Leonardo da Vinci: Yes, I shall go down in history as the man who opened a door!”–Ever After (1998)

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406)”Van Pelt:[to Alan] End of the line sonny Jim.”–Jumanji (1995)

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407)”Shelby Carpenter: I can afford a blemish on my character, but not on my clothes.”–Laura (1944)

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408)”Bruno: My theory is that everyone is a potential murderer.”–Strangers on a Train (1951)

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409)”Adrienne Fromsett: [Adrienne pitches Marlowe’s story to publisher Derace Kingsby] And he’s a very well-known private detective. That’s what makes the stuff so authentic. So full of life and vigor and heart. So full of… what would you say it was full of, Mr. Marlowe?
Philip Marlowe: Short sentences.”–Lady in the Lake (1947)

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410)”Danielle:[About all the books in the library] I could no sooner choose a favorite star in the heavens.–Ever After (1998)

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411)Sam Baldwin: She wants to meet me at the top of the Empire State Building. On Valentine’s Day.
Suzy: It’s like that movie. –
Sam: What movie?
Suzy: An Affair To Remember. Did you ever see it?Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr. She’s gonna meet him at the top of the Empire State Building…only she got hit by a taxi. And he waited and waited. And it was raining, I think. And then…she’s too proud to tell him…that she’s, uh…[starts to cry]crippled. And he’s too proud to find out why she doesn’t come. But he comes to see her anyway. I forget why, but, oh…Oh, it’s so amazing when he comes to see her because…[crying more]he doesn’t even notice that she doesn’t get up to say hello. And he’s very bitter. And you think that he’s just gonna walk out the door…and never know why she’s just lying there, you know, on the couch…with this blanket over her shriveled little legs.[sobbing] Are you all right? – She’s fine. Suddenly he goes, “I already sold the painting.” And he like goes to the bedroom…and he looks and he comes out and he looks at her and he kind of just…They know and then they hug. And it’s so…–Sleepless in Seattle (1993)

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412)”Mark McPherson: I must say, for a charming, intelligent girl, you certainly surrounded yourself with a remarkable collection of dopes.”–Laura (1944)

Det. Lt. Mark McPherson laura

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413)”Rachel Cooper: A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit. Neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Wherefore by their fruits, ye shall know them.”–Night of the Hunter (1955)

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414)”Richard Harland: When I looked at you, exotic words drifted across the mirror of my mind like clouds across the summer sky.”–Leave Her to Heaven (1945)

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415)”Elwood: What kind of music do you usually have here?
Claire: Oh, we got both kinds. We got country *and* western.”–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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416)”Young Sarah: At night they fly, you better run. These winged things are not much fun.”–Jumanji (1995)

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417)”Gang Leader: Don’t f*** with the Lords of Hell.
[Chris picks up the knife and shoves it in the gang leader’s face]
Chris: Don’t f*** with the babysitter.”–Adventures in Baby-sitting (1987)

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418)”Louise “Gypsy Rose Lee” Hovick: Nobody laughs at me! Because I laugh first. At me! Me, from Seattle! Me, with no education. Me, with no talent, as you kept reminding me my whole life! Well, Mama look at me now. I’m a star! Look! Look how I live! Look at my friends! Look where I’m going! I’m not staying in burlesque! I’m moving, mabye up, maybe down! But wherever it is, I’m enjoying it. I’m having the time of my life! Because for the first time, it is my life! And I love it. I love every second of it! And I’ll be damned if you’re gonna take it away from me! I am Gypsy Rose Lee! And I love her! And if you don’t, you can just clear out now!”–Gypsy (1962)

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419)”Alan Parrish: Don’t worry. I’ve done this before. Once.”–Jumanji (1995)

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420)”[outside Pierre Le Pieu’s castle]
Henry: Hello.
Danielle: Hello.
[pause]
Danielle: What are you doing here?
Henry: [sheepishly] I uh… I came to… rescue you.”–Ever After (1998)

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421)”Gun salesman: [to Van Pelt, who is purchasing a new gun] You’re not a postal worker, are you?”–Jumanji (1995)

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422)”Waldo Lydecker: I cannot stand these morons any longer. If you don’t come with me this instant I shall run amok.”–Laura (1944)

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423)”Johnnie Aysgarth: If you’re going to kill someone, do it simply.”–Suspicion (1941)

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424)”Judy Shepherd: [sarcastically] Is he the reason you didn’t wanna play?
Sarah Whittle: [scoffs] You didn’t want to play either, Mr. We-Started-Something-26-Years-Ago-And-Now-We’ve-Gotta-Finish-It?”–Jumanji (1995)

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425)”Henry: How do you do it?
Danielle: What?
Henry: Live each day with this kind of passion. Don’t you find it exhausting?”–Ever After (1998)

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426)”Sarah Whittle: Alan, you wrestled an alligator for me.
Alan Parrish: It was a crocodile. Alligators don’t have that little fringe on their hind leg.”–Jumanji (1995)

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427)”Shelby Carpenter: I don’t know a lot about anything, but I know a little about practically everything.”–Laura (1944)

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428))”Donkey: Hey, what’s your problem, Shrek, what you got against the whole world anyway, huh?
Shrek: Look, I’m not the one with the problem, okay? It’s the world that seems to have a problem with ME! People take one look at me and go “Aargh! Help! Run! A big stupid ugly ogre!” They judge me before they even know me – that’s why I’m better off alone…
Donkey: You know, Shrek… when we first met, I didn’t think you were a big, stupid, ugly ogre.
Shrek: Yeah, I know.”–Shrek (2001)

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429)”Elwood: It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark… and we’re wearing sunglasses.
Jake: Hit it.–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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430)”Henry: I kneel before you not as a prince, but as a man in love… But I would feel like a king if you, Danielle De Barbarac, would be my wife.”–Ever After (1998)

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431)”Brad: My only shot at ever being in a gang fight and all I get is one stitch?!–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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432)”Laura Hunt: By stooping so low you only degrade yourself.”–Laura (1944)

Laura Angry Mad Upset

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433)”Johnnie Aysgarth: He’s not exaggerating a thing, dear. It’s all true, every word he isn’t saying.”–Suspicion (1941)

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434)”Judy Shepherd: There’s a lion in my aunt’s bedroom. What am I supposed to do about that?
Alan Parrish: What do I look like, a Ringling Brother?”–Jumanji (1995)

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435)”Elwood: [Police have surrounded the Blues Brothers concert] … And we would especially like to welcome all the representatives of Illinois’s law enforcement community that have chosen to join us here in the Palace Hotel Ballroom at this time…”–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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436)”Peter Shepherd: This will not be an easy mission – monkeys slow the expedition.”–Jumanji (1995)

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437)”Chris: Brad, no chocolate! Your acne! Sarah. It is time for your cough syrup. Daryl, fasten the seat belt!
Sarah: She’s definitely losing it.
Chris: I am not losing anything, I am still in control here!”–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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438)”Graham Bloomwood: [talk to Rebecca] Life is like a swap meet. You never know when great riches… are going to turn up unexpectedly.”–Confessions of a Shopaholic (2009)

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439)”Alan Parrish: Sarah and I would like to get out of the floor, so it’s your turn, Peter.”–Jumanji (1995)

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440)”Henry: Please, Danielle…
Danielle: Say it again.
Henry: I’m sorry.
Danielle: No, the part where you said my name.”–Ever After

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441)”Judy Shepherd: [reading the sign on the board] ‘A law of Jumanji having been broken, you will slip back even more than your token’.
Sarah Whittle: You tried to cheat?
Peter Shepherd: No, I tried to drop the dice so they’d land on twelve.
Sarah Whittle: Oh, okay, honey. Well, that would be cheating.”–Jumanji (1995)

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442)”Mark McPherson: I suspect no one, and I suspect everyone.”–Laura (1944)

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443)”Wally: Oh boy! I’m so smart it’s a disease!”–Mildred Pierce (1945)

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444)”Alan Parrish: I’m terrified. But my father says you should always face what you’re afraid of.”–Jumanji (1995)

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445)”Pinocchio: I’m not a puppet, I’m a real boy!
[nose grows]
Captain of Guards: Five shillings for the possessed toy. Take it away.”–Shrek (2001)

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446)”Peter Shepherd: Need a hand? Well, you just wait. We’ll help you out. We each have eight.”–Jumanji (1995)

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447)”Louise: “I love you” is such an inadequate way of saying I love you. It doesn’t quite describe how much it hurts sometimes.”–Possessed (1947)

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448)”Donkey: That’s right, fool! Now I’m a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkeyfly!”–Shrek (2001)

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449)”Matt Murphy: What they want to eat?
Mrs. Murphy: The tall one wants white bread, toasted, dry, with nothin’ on it.
Matt Murphy: Elwood.
Mrs. Murphy: And the other one wants four whole fried chickens and a Coke.
Matt Murphy: And Jake. S***, the Blues Brothers!”–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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450)”Gypsy Leader: M’lady, you may have anything you can carry.
Danielle: [glances at the Prince] May I have your word on that, sir?
Gypsy Leader: [considers for a moment] On my honor as a gypsy, whatever you can carry.
[Danielle lifts the Prince over her shoulders and begins to walk off with him. The gypsies laugh]
Gypsy Leader: [laughing] Wait! Please! Come back! I’ll give you a horse!”–Ever After (1998)

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451)”Chris: I don’t think your parents will ever ask me to babysit again.
Brad: If they do, I’d ask them for a buck more an hour.”–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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452)”Stella Meredith: But you must be brilliant.
Roderick Fitzgerald: Oh, dazzling. People have to wear sunglasses.”–The Uninvited (1944)

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453)”Donkey: I’m all alone, there’s no one here beside me. My problems have all gone, there’s no one to deride me! But ya gotta have friends…”–Shrek (2001)

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454)”Hunter Van Pelt: Any last words?
[Alan looks down and notices his game piece moving to the end of the board, after which the word “Jumanji” appears]
Alan Parrish: [quietly] Jumanji.”–Jumanji (1995)

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455)”Elwood: [during “Everybody Needs Somebody to Love”] People, when you do find that special somebody, you gotta hold that man, hold that woman! Love him, please him, squeeze her, please her! Signify your feelings with every gentle caress, because it’s so important to have that special somebody to hold, to kiss, to miss, to squeeze, and please!”–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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456)”Judy Shepherd: There is a lesson you will learn: sometimes you must go back a turn.”–Jumanji (1995)

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457)”Daryl: Don’t touch it! It could get infected, Jesus! He could get anything – Tetanus, rabies, scabies, emphysema!”–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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458)”Donkey: I like that boulder. That is a NICE boulder.”–Shrek (2001)

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459)”Eric Liddell: You came to see a race today. To see someone win. It happened to be me. But I want you to do more than just watch a race. I want you to take part in it. I want to compare faith to running in a race. It’s hard. It requires concentration of will, energy of soul. You experience elation when the winner breaks the tape – especially if you’ve got a bet on it. But how long does that last? You go home. Maybe you’re dinner’s burnt. Maybe you haven’t got a job. So who am I to say, “Believe, have faith,” in the face of life’s realities? I would like to give you something more permanent, but I can only point the way. I have no formula for winning the race. Everyone runs in her own way, or his own way. And where does the power come from, to see the race to its end? From within. Jesus said, “Behold, the Kingdom of God is within you. If with all your hearts, you truly seek me, you shall ever surely find me.” If you commit yourself to the love of Christ, then that is how you run a straight race.”–Chariots of Fire (1981)

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460)”Pierre Le Pieu: I may be twice your age, child, but I’m well endowed.
[Danielle turns away to another basket]
Pierre Le Pieu: As evidenced by my estate, I’ve always had a soft spot for the less fortunate. You need a wealthy benefactor – and I need a young lady with spirit.
Danielle: [looks up and smiles] Prunes?”–Ever After (1998)

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461)”Sarah Whittle: You’re almost there with much at stake, but now the ground begins to quake…”–Jumanji (1995)

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462)”Sherry Wilson: I asked for nothing, I expected nothing and I got nothing.
Vince Everett: Well, what’d you expect for nothing?”–Jailhouse Rock (1957)

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463)”Mildred: Friendship’s much more lasting than love.”–Mildred Pierce (1945)

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464)”Harold M. Abrahams: If I can’t win, I won’t run!
Sybil Gordon: If you don’t run, you can’t win.”–Chariots of Fire (1981)

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465)”[threatening Pierre le Pieu to back off, holding a sword and dagger dangerously close to him]
Danielle: My father was an excellent swordsman, monsieur. He taught me well. Now hand me that key or I swear on his grave I will slit you from navel to nose.”–Ever After (1998)

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466)”Sarah Whittle: Well, a little rain never hurt anybody!
Alan Parrish: Yeah, but a lot can kill you! Come on!”–Jumanji (1995)

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467)”Jake: Well thank you, pal. The day I get outta prison, my own brother picks me up in a *police* car!”–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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468)”Donkey: We can stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I’m making waffles!”–Shrek (2001)

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469)”Lord Cadogan: Don’t be impertinent, Liddell!
Eric Liddell: The impertinence lies, sir, with those who seek to influence a man to deny his beliefs!”–Chariots of Fire (1981)

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470)”Henry: I have not slept for fear I would wake to find all this a dream.”–Ever After (1998)

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471)”Gregory Anton: I knew from the first moment I saw you that you were dangerous to me.
Brian Cameron: I knew from the first moment I saw you that you were dangerous to her.”–Gaslight (1944)

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472)”Norma Desmond: I *am* big. It’s the *pictures* that got small.”–Sunset Boulevard (1950)

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473)”[Shrek discovers the seven dwarves have placed Snow White on his kitchen table]
Shrek: Oh, no no no no! Dead broad OFF the table!”–Shrek (2001)

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474)”Monsieur Hood: I steal from the rich and give to the needy…
Merry Man: He takes a wee percentage…
Monsieur Hood: But I’m not greedy – I rescue pretty damsels, man I’m good!
Merry Men: What a guy, ha ha, Monsieur Hood!”–Shrek (2001)

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475)”Brad: [to Joe Gipp] Sir. Would you please take us to the next corner, and drop us off?
Joe Gipp: [chuckling] In this neighborhood? Hey, I wouldn’t even get out of the car in this neighborhood.
Brad: Could you drop us off at the nearest mall?
Joe Gipp: A mall? Where y’all think we’re at, Boise, Idaho? Shooo!”–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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476)”Paula Alquist Anton: If I were not mad, I could have helped you. Whatever you had done, I could have pitied and protected you. But because I am mad, I hate you. Because I am mad, I have betrayed you. And because I’m mad, I’m rejoicing in my heart, without a shred of pity, without a shred of regret, watching you go with glory in my heart!”–Gaslight (1944)

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477)”Norma Desmond: They took the idols and smashed them, the Fairbankses, the Gilberts, the Valentinos! And who’ve we got now? Some nobodies!”–Sunset Boulevard (1950)

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478)”Homicide Detective: Can I help you?
Frank Bigelow: I’d like to see the man in charge.
Homicide Detective: In here…
Frank Bigelow: I want to report a murder.
Homicide Captain: Sit down. Where was this murder committed?
Frank Bigelow: San Francisco, last night.
Homicide Captain: Who was murdered?
Frank Bigelow: I was.”–D.O.A. (1950)

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479)”Alan Parrish: [while being sunk in the wooden floor as quicksand] Stop giving me things that come apart!”–Jumanji (1995)

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480)”Eric Liddell: God made countries, God makes kings, and the rules by which they govern. And those rules say that the Sabbath is His. And I for one intend to keep it that way.”–Chariots of Fire (1981)

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481)”Waldo Lydecker: How singularly innocent I look this morning.”–Laura (1944)

Waldo Lybecker Laura Innocent

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482)”Joe Gillis: Audiences don’t know somebody sits down and writes a picture; they think the actors make it up as they go along.”–Sunset Boulevard (1950)

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483)”Tomek Zaleska: That’s the trouble with being innocent – you don’t know what really happened.”–Call Northside 777 (1948)

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484)”Tarquin: Why do so many of your excuses involve Finland?
Rebecca Bloomwood: Because nobody checks up on Finland,Tarkie. “–Confessions of a Shopaholic (2009)

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485)”His Royal Highness,  Edward, Prince of Wales: There are times when we are asked to make sacrifices in the name of that loyalty. And without them our allegiance is worthless. As I see it, for you, this is such a time.
Eric Liddell: Sir, God knows I love my country. But I can’t make that sacrifice. “–Chariots of Fire (1981)

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486)”Albert Collins: Nobody leaves this place without singing the blues.”–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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487)”Gingerbread Man: NO! Not the buttons! Not my gumdrop buttons!”–Shrek (2001)

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488)”Brad: [grabs him by the collar] I’d love to hit you. I’d love to pound on your face!
Mike: Yeah? Go ahead.
Brad: But I won’t. You’re so slimy, I won’t sink to your level.
Daryl: I will.
[kicks Mike]”–Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

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489)”Alan Parrish: Play the game, Sarah.
Sarah Whittle: [whispering] Oh, no, no, no.
Alan Parrish: All right. Just give me the dice, and you can go home. You don’t have to play.
Sarah Whittle: Oh, thank you.
[Sarah gives Alan the dice but moves his hand making Sarah roll as Alan laughs for fun]
Sarah Whittle: [loses it] Oh, my god! How could you do that?
Alan Parrish: It’s the law of the jungle, Sarah. You’ll get used to it.”–Jumanji (1995)

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490)”Mrs. Tarantino: Are you the police?
Elwood: No, ma’am. We’re musicians.”–The Blues Brothers (1980)

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491)”Waldo Lydecker: Love is eternal. It has been the strongest motivation for human actions throughout history. Love is stronger than life. It reaches beyond the dark shadow of death.”–Laura (1944)

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492)”Norma Desmond: Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up.”–Sunset Boulevard (1950)

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493)”Doc: What idiot dressed you in that outfit?
Marty McFly: You did”–Back to the Future Part III (1990)

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494)”Alan Parrish: Okay, it’s my turn. I got it! “Colonel Mustard in the Library with a wrench.”
[chuckles]’Clue’.”–Jumanji (1995)

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495)”Becky: He said hello, and what did you say?
Annie: All I could say was hello…
Becky: It’s a sign.
Annie: It’s a sign that I have watched this movie too many times.”–Sleepless in Seattle (1993)

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496)”Rebecca Bloomwood: They said I was a valued customer. Now they send me hate mail.”–Confessions of a Shopaholic (2009)

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497)”Jonah:[About Sam and Annie] Your hearts are like puzzles with missing pieces. And when you get together, the puzzle’s complete.–Sleepless in Seattle

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498)”Buford “Mad Dog” Tannen: What’s your name, dude?
Marty McFly: Uh, Mar- Eastwood. Clint Eastwood.”–Back to the Future Part III (1990)

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499)”Princess Fiona: [shocked] What kind of knight ARE you?
Shrek: One of a kind.”–Shrek (2001)

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500)”Marty McFly: [arriving in 1955] Oh, this is heavy, Doc. I mean, it’s like I was just here yesterday.
Doc: You were here yesterday, Marty.”–Back to the Future Part II (1989)

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For more of my favorite lines go to Episode IV: A New Favorite Movie Lines List

For more on Back to the Future go to Fashion Show

For more on Shrek go to I Wouldn’t Change You, Darling

For more on Sleepless in Seattle go to Anything Can Happen

For more on Strangers on a Train go to I Wanna Get Off This Ride

Quite A Horror Story: Agatha Christie’s Poirot Hallowe’en Party (2011)

She is…a teller of the tall tales, a boaster, a little liar. So when she claims to have witnessed the murder, nobody believes her. And yet, she is… dead. 

So this was a film done by the BBC based on Agatha Christie’s novel, Hallowe’en Party. I think David Suchet is a perfect Poirot, as he looks just the way I always imagined Poirot to look like. However, something I don’t like about the modern retellings, is that  they tend to change a lot of the plot lines of the novel, and usually not for the better (Third Girl was awful. They didn’t use the best twist from the book). Rarely do I watch the film version before reading the book, which I did here, so I didn’t have the same unpleasantness as seeing them change plot lines that I thought were crucial in the book.

So the film starts out with Poirot’s friend, and mystery writer extraordinaire, Ariadne Oliver helping with a children’s Halloween party. All the kids are playing around, laughing, bobbing for apples, eating candy, etc. A little girl named Joyce starts talking to Oliver, telling her that she once witnessed a murder. Everyone makes fun of her, teasing and insulting her as she tends to always tell “tall tales”. No one believes her.

Later the children are all playing snapdragon, which they make sound so creepy. Instead of playing background music throughout the film, they play the children’s voices chanting the song in unison. It is as creepy as The Crucible scene when the girls are all “possessed”.

After the game is done, they are rounding up the children and discover Joyce missing. She is found drowned in a bucket that was used for bobbing for apples.

Oliver wastes no time at all, but immediately calls in Poirot to solve the case.

Poirot immediately looks into which murders in the town are unsolved, to see which ones have the potential to be the one Joyce saw. Many try to discourage him from doing so, telling him that Joyce was a liar and a storyteller. She did it to feel important and show off. Poirot is firmly decided that whether or not Joyce was telling the truth, someone out there is guilty of murder and thinks Joyce was a witness.

The possibilities of who Joyce might have seen are Mrs. Llewellyn-Smythe, the aunt of Rowena Drake’s late husband, apparently died of a heart attack. Her death is suspicious because of her will, it said that her au pair was to inherit everything over the family. Authorities believe that it was faked by the au pair, Olga Seminoff, who mysteriously disappeared after the forgery was discovered. Other candidates for murder involve Charlotte Benfield, a sixteen-year-old shop assistant found dead of multiple head injuries; Lesley Ferrier, a lawyer’s clerk who was stabbed in the back; and Janet White, a schoolteacher who was strangled.

Which one is the murder Joyce saw? Who committed it? Did Joyce even see a murder occur? Just like The Bad SeedThe Cabinet of Dr. Caligariand The Secret Window, this is one you have to check out for yourself and see where the truth lies.

The only thing I don’t like about this film, is the fact that Poirot disapproves of those who take enjoyment in such a holiday as Halloween. He thinks the macabre is not something you should be so joyous about. Well, I don’t; I love watching horror movies and getting into Halloween. That’s why I did my 31 Tales of Terror and Woe. In fact today marks 11 days left to Halloween! 😀

Here’s today’s scary post. More to come!

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To start Horrorfest from the begining, go to I Don’t Belong in the World

For the previous post, go to I’m No Warrior, I’m an Assistant Pig-Keeper

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For more on murder, go to Camp Blood

For more on Masterpiece Theater, go to A Hunky Helping of Manwich

For more on Halloween parties, go to A River of Candy Corn Runs Through It

For more film adaptions of books, go to I Bid You Welcome

For more on bobbing for apples, go to A Halloween Hello from the Austen Men